Ep 251 - How Introverts Can Thrive At Public Speaking with guest Kate Gilbert

Are you an introvert who’s ever wondered if public speaking is really for you? In this episode of The Quiet And Strong Podcast, host David Hall welcomes award-winning speaking coach Kate Gilbert to share her expertise and personal journey from self-doubt to stage confidence. Whether you’ve felt nervous in front of an audience or questioned your ability to communicate your message, this conversation will inspire you with practical strategies and fresh perspectives.

Listeners will learn why public speaking is a skill anyone can master, how to tap into the unique strengths of introverts—like imagination and self-reflection—and the real differences between shyness and introversion. Kate Gilbert reveals actionable tips for building confidence, effective preparation techniques, and the power of storytelling to engage any audience. Discover how managing your energy, receiving constructive feedback, and finding your authentic voice can transform your public speaking experience.

If you’re ready to challenge old myths, embrace your natural talents, and gain insight from both Kate Gilbert's coaching and David Hall’s lived experience, this episode is your guide. Tune in, learn to thrive on stage, and be strong.

Episode Link: QuietandStrong.com/251

Kate Gilbert is an award-winning speaking coach with over eight years of experience. Trained as an actor, she spent years performing, writing, and hosting events before launching her business coaching entrepreneurs, academics, business leaders and CEOs of global companies to elevate their presentations, communication, and presence. Kate also delivers talks in communication and performance, hosts public events and speaks regularly on podcasts.

Connect with Kate through her website or on LinkedIn 

Transcript

Kate Gilbert [00:00:00]:
Obviously, my final word is to everyone. Everyone can do public speaking. There are, it's a learned skill and there are ways and sometimes it's mindset things that are blocking us. But once we identify what those are and we get them out of the way, we are free to express, free to get on stage and share our knowledge and our wisdom.

David Hall [00:00:29]:
Hello and welcome to episode 251 of the Quiet and Strong podcast, especially for Introverts. I'm your host, David hall and the creator of quietandstrong.com this is a weekly podcast dedicated to understanding the strengths and needs of introverts along with strategies for success. Introversion is not something to fix, but to be embraced. Normally, we'll air each episode on a Monday. Be sure to subscribe on your favorite platform, leave a review or rating that would mean a lot to me and also help others find the show, tell a friend about the podcast and help get the word out there that introversion is a beautiful thing. Kate Gilbert is an award winning speaking coach with over eight years of experience. Trained as an actor, she spent years performing, writing and hosting events before launching her business, coaching entrepreneurs, academics, business leaders and CEOs of global companies to elevate their presentations, communication and presence. Kate also delivers talks in communication and performance, hosts public events, and speaks regularly on podcasts.

David Hall [00:01:29]:
Kate draws on her passion for writing and performing and her skill of very quickly drawing out people's confidence. Her sessions are practical and holistic, often using meditation and visualization to help our clients get transformative results.

David Hall [00:01:45]:
All right, well, welcome to the Quiet and Strong podcast. Kate. Kate, it's so good to have you on today.

Kate Gilbert [00:01:51]:
It's really great to be here. Thank you, David.

David Hall [00:01:53]:
Yeah, so Kate is in the process of writing a book for public Speaking for Introverts and thought it would be great to have her on and talk about the work she does as a public speaking coach and, you know, especially when it comes to being an introvert. So tell us about the work that you do and how you got to that point.

Kate Gilbert [00:02:11]:
Well, I trained as an actor, first of all, and I think a lot of people assume that because you've done actor job training, you're really confident and it's easier for actors to stand up on stage and do talks and things like that. It was not the case for me and I realized quite early on when I came out of drama school that I actually didn't feel that confident going into auditions even, or sometimes even being on stage. In some ways it's, it's different because when you're acting, you have rehearsed a million times. You know exactly what the words are going to be that come out of your mouth. And you're playing a character, so you're not playing yourself. So when you strip all of that away and you're standing on the stage as you. It actually can feel very vulnerable for. For many actors, actually, because we're not.

Kate Gilbert [00:02:57]:
We're not really used to that. We're used to putting on a cloak in some ways, or a mask even of a different character. So it's quite a different experience. And I think when I came out of drama school, I thought, oh, my goodness. Because. Because part of the job is a lot about networking. So you're often out at, you know, watching plays, meeting casting directors, trying to, you know, schmooze with directors and other people so that you get cast in things. And I found that really, really difficult.

Kate Gilbert [00:03:24]:
And I saw other people, probably more extroverted characters, doing that really well. And I really noticed that that was something I really struggled with. So I went on a bit of a journey myself to kind of find out, how can I learn confidence and what can I do? And I went. And I think I did lots of courses. In fact, I probably did too many courses. But I kept looking for the next big thing that was going to help me to feel really confident and comfortable on stages.

David Hall [00:03:54]:
Yeah, we're going to get into that. You're going to share what you know about that. You know, we bust myths on this show. And it's funny you mentioned you're an actor. A lot of people think, well, introverts can't be actors. And, you know, it's like, there's a Smith that we don't like to perform. And I'm not. I'm no actor, but I loved doing this podcast.

David Hall [00:04:16]:
I love giving speeches and so, you know, a form of performance. Tell us about that. What is the myth that introverts can't be actors or comedians or fill in the blank?

Kate Gilbert [00:04:27]:
I think it's really funny because there's actual statistics out there that are. Is the. The percentage of introverts in the industry of acting, even in Hollywood, is a lot higher than you would think. There's something. And I, you know, you've probably touched on this many times. There was something really beautiful about the mind of an introvert. I know for myself, I spent a lot of time on my own as a child, and what I did in that time was I went into my imagination and I made up plays and I made up stories and I sang songs to myself. And I really honed my imagination through that alone time.

Kate Gilbert [00:05:04]:
And so actually there are many actors who are actors because they've also honed their imagination to such an extent. So it's not really unfamiliar to find introverts. And in fact many of them are the perfect people to be in a creative, in the creative industries, in a creative role.

David Hall [00:05:21]:
Yeah, that's beautiful. I love that. And it's, it's, that's a gift that many introverts have. We have these great imaginations and we can come up with great ideas or do well in performances and in all of that. So I love that.

Kate Gilbert [00:05:38]:
And there's obviously the myth that, you know, introverts are shy, you know, they're the wallflowers. But I, I'm like, I love getting up on stage. I actually now, especially in my 40s, I feel more at home on stage than any anywhere else sometimes because I get to express myself through creativity. And that's an absolute passion of mine. And I think that's what drives many people to get on stage and to. Or be in films and be performers. So the shyness can go and be replaced by that passion and that desire to want to express yourself creatively. And I, yeah, I think that as, particularly in my younger years, I remember at school and I went to my careers advisor when I was about 15, 16 and they said, so what do you want to do, Kate, for work experience? I said, I want to go and work in a theater because I'm going to be an actress.

Kate Gilbert [00:06:32]:
And they said, oh, I don't think that's a good idea for you. Why don't we put you in like surveying or something instead? And that's actually what I went and did for my work experience. Just trundling around in a hard hat and boots thinking, what on earth am I doing here? But it was assumed because I was so quiet and shy that that would not be a job that I could do. And I think that was definitely the opinion, you know, 20, 30 years ago. And it probably maybe still is for, for some, some people that, that you need that extroversion to be able to be public facing.

David Hall [00:07:09]:
Yeah, it still exists and that's why I do the show. So.

Kate Gilbert [00:07:12]:
Right. So there we go.

David Hall [00:07:14]:
And you know, it's funny because sometimes people think introverts and introversion and shyness are the same. But I know shy extroverts, it's just shyness as you lack confidence. I also know some very outspoken and confident introverts. And you know, you said it well, it's like introverts have deep, you know, deep imaginations and they go into their, you know, the inner world a lot more and great stuff comes from that. But yeah, if you are shy, you don't have to stay that way. And we're going to definitely talk about things that you do or help people do to overcome shyness and gain confidence. But they're shy.

Kate Gilbert [00:07:48]:
So shy isn't the right word, Possibly not the right. I guess, yeah. Lack of confidence. I suppose that that's what that can come down to. And that's the thing I struggle with sometimes when I think about introversion, even with myself, I'm like, am I an introvert or have I just got a lack of. Have I had a lack of confidence? You know. But I've definitely have some traits of introversion and I think, you know, needing time on my own quite a lot to recharge and also going into my imagination a lot as well. Definitely something that I did when I was younger, when I was growing up.

David Hall [00:08:24]:
Yeah. So how did you get into public speaking?

Kate Gilbert [00:08:27]:
So I. One of the things that I did when I was looking for these courses to learn, how do you become more confident? Is I, I on this course called the Leadership of Mastery. The mastery of leadership and self expression. And at the end of the course there was an open mic night and I had been writing because I'd always written and I'd written some poetry songs actually and someone said to me, why don't you get up on the open mic and perform them? And I was kind of like, well, no, I don't think so. I haven't performed them. No one's heard them before. And my friend said, yes, but you've just done this self expression, a leadership course, so you should be able to do it now. So, so I did, I challenged myself.

Kate Gilbert [00:09:06]:
I got up there and I did this song and someone came up to me afterwards and said, oh, it was so. It was so beautiful. Please go and share that with everybody. Like people need to hear your, your. Your work. And that gave me a different sense of purpose than just thinking, oh my God, I'm up here having all these physical sensations and this uncomfort. This discomfort of being up there. It became more about I have something to give that people want to hear.

Kate Gilbert [00:09:34]:
And that became a stronger purpose and the way. A way that I got to stage. So throughout my 20s I performed a lot in cabarets and small, small theaters and events performing these poetry songs. And at one point someone came over to me and said, Kate, the, the compares not here. They're late. I don't know if they're going to make it. Do you think you could step in? And again, my shot, my shyness or my lack of confidence stepped in and was like thinking, no way. Oh, my God, how terrifying.

Kate Gilbert [00:10:07]:
But again, I was like, yeah, I will. Because I looked around and there were only. All the other performers were male. And I was like, I'm the only woman here. I need to stand up for women and be a voice for women as well. So I said yes. And I did it. And I actually did it really well.

Kate Gilbert [00:10:20]:
I surprised myself. People thought it was quite funny. And I came off going, okay, that is something I can do. And so then I did more of that. I did a lot more hosting and presenting. And later in my life, when I was teaching in schools, teaching young people acting, I was asked if I would teach them public speaking, which was on the. The lambda syllabus that I was teaching at the time. And I said yes.

Kate Gilbert [00:10:47]:
And I figured out how to teach it through working with those young people. It was a success, thankfully. And I worked in that school for three years, and I taught hundreds of young people how to create speeches, how to speak confidently, and how to use their voices. And that's really how I got into public speaking. And when I left there, I thought, what kind of, what am I going to do now? And I remember my brother saying to me, why don't you teach adults how to do public speaking? And I thought, because it's not the same as children, but actually wasn't. There wasn't a huge amount of difference in terms of the things that I was teaching and the training that I had received myself through my own actor training to that that was transferable and that I could use equally with adults as. As with young people.

David Hall [00:11:33]:
Yeah.

Kate Gilbert [00:11:34]:
And yeah.

David Hall [00:11:35]:
And I love that someone gave you encouragement. Hey, you have some great things to share. And I think for me, that's. That's been important. And sometimes we have to tell ourselves that there's a reason why you're giving this presentation or speech because you important to share. So let's talk about that. How do people gain confidence when it's lacking?

Kate Gilbert [00:11:55]:
There's a few ways. I would say the biggest way for me I found was, was. And people are going to hate me for saying this, but it was actually just to get up there and do it. It really was feel the fear and do it anyway. And then when you come off stage, it's not about berating yourself and going, I didn't do this. And I didn't do that, and that sounded awful. I. I think the way to build your confidence is to get off stage even if it bombed, and go, oh, my God, well done.

Kate Gilbert [00:12:26]:
Well done for getting yourself up there and doing something that was out of your comfort zone. And the next time it's going to be a bit easier. And I think the mistake that some people make is that they have a bad experience and they go, okay, it's not for me. I'm not a good public speaker, therefore that's not something I do and I will not do that again. But most great public speakers have started somewhere and they probably bombed at least once. And the difference between them and someone who didn't carry on is that they just got up and they tried it again. And so it really is a lot about actually taking the action, because you can read a book about it. And as you.

Kate Gilbert [00:13:07]:
As we will talk about, I'm writing a book about it. But the theory is great and it's really, really helpful, but if you're not actually practicing, you won't. You won't get anywhere. It's. It's really through action. Confidence is on the other side of action. It doesn't come before. And I think that's a real key to remember for people and just to be really gentle with yourself as you guide yourself doing, through doing something that's actually very confronting for lots of people.

Kate Gilbert [00:13:38]:
And, and I'd like to, you know, say that nobody is alone if they think they're someone that can't do public speaking or they get so nervous because I've had clients come to me who have been sick before they go onto stage, who have been in floods of tears, who have had uncontrollable shakes on stage, who have nearly lost their jobs because they weren't doing a good job at public speaking. And I have helped them through mindset work as well as technique to completely transform that to a point where they would go on stage and then call me the next day and go, oh, my God. It was a completely different experience. I actually enjoyed it. People came up to me afterwards, they wanted to know more about what I was doing, and they had a successful and a positive experience with it. So I absolutely believe and know I can say pretty much a hundred percent that everybody can do it and everybody can get to a point where it's almost enjoyable, which may surprise people.

David Hall [00:14:35]:
Right. And I love how you start with appreciating yourself. You know, start with the positive. And I also say, I think a gift that introverts all share is reflection, and we can think about, okay, I did a great job there. If I did it again, you know, what would I do differently? And along with that, something that I've used that you were talking about is, I'm not perfect, but nobody else is either. Nobody listening to me is perfect. No.

Kate Gilbert [00:15:07]:
And we're so critical of ourselves. I. I had a client this week, and he'd sent me some videos to watch of him speaking. And I was thinking, oh, he's not that bad, actually. Like, why is he coming? He's not that bad. And then when I spoke to him, he had a whole load of ideas about why it was terrible. And I kind of said, well, what did you think was good about it? And he picked up on, like, one thing. And it's just a real example of how, in our minds, we are so much more critical of ourselves than we are actually perceived by other people.

Kate Gilbert [00:15:40]:
We are literally our own worst enemies for things like this. And I think it is worth asking people in the audience afterwards, you know, not just how did I do, but was I loud enough? You know, you can ask some specific questions, so then you know what you have to work on. Did I look visibly nervous? Did my message come across clearly? Did. Did you get lost at any points? You know, did I. Did I seem like I had passion when I was speaking? And then we kind of know, okay, that's fine. If we seem like we didn't have passion, no problem. Next time I'm going to figure out, how do I bring that passion into what I'm saying as a. As a focus and a way to improve over time.

David Hall [00:16:23]:
Yeah. And you're also saying, you know, start. And that's. That can be an important thing. And, you know, I. When I was younger, I definitely was terr. I couldn't imagine myself doing something like this podcast or giving a speech. And I'm going on five years on the podcast, and I say, I'd like to think I was just brilliant with episode number one, but I know over time I've just gotten so much more comfortable and better with the whole thing.

David Hall [00:16:55]:
But you have to start somewhere.

Kate Gilbert [00:16:59]:
Yeah, absolutely. And I remember when I did my first online video. So, you know, as coaches and people with business, we often. We have to do videos to promote ourselves. And I. It was in the lockdown, and suddenly everything had gone online, and I was like, oh, my goodness, I can't rely on being out there and being charming, you know, being in the room with people. So how am I going to find my audience? And Connect with them. And I noticed a lot of other coaches and consultants were doing videos of themselves and putting them online.

Kate Gilbert [00:17:27]:
And I thought, okay, that's what I need to do. And it literally took me, not joking, it took me three days from start to when I posted that video, because the first one I was like, oh God, I couldn't put that up. And then there was the fear of it. Then there was the judgments of what's everyone going to think when they see this? And then there was like, I'm a public speaking coach, I'm supposed to be brilliant this. But I, it was the first time I'd done it, so I was like, can I put this video out there? Then I had to send it around to all my friends, you know, and eventually I did. And now I can put the camera on. I hardly even need to rehearse myself anymore because I've got so much practice at doing it and so, so good at watching it back and being able to be self critical in a way that helps me to improve for the next time in a positive way rather than kind of putting myself down. I'm like, okay, I could do this better next time I could do that.

Kate Gilbert [00:18:17]:
I'll try that, I'll try it this way. And just building up gradually. But yeah, giving myself the space to, to do better and to be okay with not being amazing the first time.

David Hall [00:18:30]:
So you're saying that you believe pretty much everybody can get better and become good public speakers?

Kate Gilbert [00:18:37]:
Yeah, it is. And I know this through acting as well. You can train your voice, you can understand what's happening with your body language, you can change the way that you stand on stage, you can change the way that you enter the stage, you can change your energy when you come into the space and when you learn those things, that you can have some control over all of that or take control over those elements, it changes the way that you come across to your audience. And of course you can also look at things like using stories in your presentation. How do you start your presentation? Because all of these things as well, they are techniques and there's structures and there's frameworks that you can use that are, I would say, quite successful. And the difference is that when it lands better with the audience, the feedback you get, even just on looking at their face and feeling the energy in the room is very different. And when you get that, you start to have that experience from your presentations, your mind starts going, oh, okay, I can do this, I actually can do this. Well, but it can all be, it's it's learned skills.

Kate Gilbert [00:19:51]:
It's not. I don't know if anyone's actually born an amazing public speaker. I think probably very few people are, but I do think there probably are some. And I remember years ago teaching, debating in a primary school and these girls, it was an all girls school. They, some of them were incredible speakers and at the time I just remember thinking, how on earth are they so good? They must have been born this way. So I think there probably are some, but I think generally for most of us it's a learned skill and it's a practicing and it's a doing thing.

David Hall [00:20:35]:
Yeah, for sure. And you mentioned storytelling. Let's dive into that a bit more. Why is storytelling important? How can we prepare our stories and plug in the right stories?

Kate Gilbert [00:20:48]:
Storytelling has been around forever. That's how we've always shared experiences and news and messages and how we've learned. Often we learn through other people's experience and we kind of look for that because it makes more sense to us to learn rather than be told. Don't do that. If you told me a story about someone who had done that and what happened to them, I would be much more likely not to do something than just being told. Don't do that. So stories are more powerful in terms of humans actually taking action from our words than just giving us some data points or some facts or telling us what we should or shouldn't do. It's more effective when we can actually, when it's emotive and we can feel something.

Kate Gilbert [00:21:38]:
Stories are great because they also create pictures in our minds and pictures are sticky for our memories as well. So I think stories are great. I think people are using them more and more in public speaking. And also they're just more entertaining and if we can entertain our audience at any point, we're much more likely to keep their, maintain their attention and keep their, their interest in, in what it is that we're, we're talking about.

David Hall [00:22:07]:
Do you have any advice for people gathering their stories?

Kate Gilbert [00:22:11]:
Oh, you know, just trying to think because someone did a story the other day that was. I kind of remember what it was now, but it was so unrelated to their work. It was a personal story, it was completely unrelated. But they had, they had woven in in such a way that it made the point, it really made the point stand out of what they were saying. It made it really, really clear. I wish I could remember what it was. But your story. You see, we're constantly creating stories.

Kate Gilbert [00:22:46]:
I've created stories today just, just, you know, by meeting Someone by having a meal that I really liked, by a conversation I may have had with someone on the street as I passed by. We. We have stories. Stories are being created constantly in our lives. Some of those stories are going to really stand up out and be memorable. Those stories are often really good stories to use in some way. Often with stories in our life, we can find a theme, and it could be a theme of resilience, or it could be a theme of shame, even. Any of these themes that often come up in.

Kate Gilbert [00:23:22]:
When we're talking about our work or we're. We're doing a presentation, sometimes we can find a really good story from our own lives that will be a good example of that. I know that Steve Jobs does a brilliant speech, which is kind of his origin story of how he got to where he was. And it is just three stories of his life sewn together. And you can see the seeds and how they're all woven and sewn together. And it's the most beautiful example of trust, I think, just trusting yourself and going with what comes and making the most of every opportunity, even when you don't know why you're doing it. So, you know, it's trying to find a theme and your message and then thinking, what stories do I have that are examples of this? So everyone has stories in their lives and sometimes it can be very simple, very short stories, and sometimes they can be more meaningful and more elaborate. But I think if you look at people, places, events, all of these things, if you just think funny stories as well, accidents sometimes can be great stories.

Kate Gilbert [00:24:32]:
Yeah. Or all of. If you think about it in those times, you can probably think, oh, actually, yeah, if I think about a person in my life, I have got a good story about them. So it's trying to, you know, find your stories. Haven't. Do a little bit of digging, do a little bit of creative exploration. Exploration and try and unearth some really good stories that would work alongside a theme or a point that you want to make.

David Hall [00:24:55]:
Yeah. So storytelling is definitely a piece of connecting and engaging with your audience. Do you have other tips on connecting and engaging with your audience?

Kate Gilbert [00:25:05]:
Eye contact, that's a really big one. And it's actually really hard. And I think potentially for introverts, it's quite hard to make eye contact. It feels very uncomfortable. It feels. I think, you know, one thing about introverts is we get overstimulated and looking into someone's eyes, there can be a whole world of sensitivity that we can pick up just by actually making eye contact. And for some people, it's very overstimulating. It can be very overwhelming.

Kate Gilbert [00:25:36]:
But it's also the thing that creates connection between human beings. And if somebody feels in the audience that the eye contact is not being made, they won't feel seen or validated and therefore they will start to question, why should they be there? Why should they give their time to someone who is not giving them attention through eye contact? It's a really, really good way to connect with your audience. And even if it feels uncomfortable, I say start getting used to it. You know, one of those things, you know, just think, okay, in this, ask people, did I make eye contact afterwards? That's another thing you can ask. And if they say, not really, then think, okay, next time, in my next presentation, I'm going to make sure I look at at least five people in my audience and spend a moment with each of those and just build up. Because it can be uncomfortable, but it becomes less uncomfortable the more that we do it. We kind of break through a barrier with it and then it becomes normal.

David Hall [00:26:41]:
Yeah. And then how do introverts best prepare? And does that look any different for extroverts?

Kate Gilbert [00:26:49]:
I think it does probably look different for extroverts, but again, we can't really generalize because everyone's got different stuff going on. For introverts, I would say, what's. Some people like to go and wing it when they get up there. And I, and I, I say to most people, unless you're a real seasoned speaker, unless you just have that much trust and faith in yourself that you can show up on any stage and just start speaking and it land with your audience, please, please, please prepare. Because not only is it making it harder for you, it can actually waste the time and attention that your audience is giving you as well. If you go into a rambling story or you get lost or you don't quite hit your marks or get your message across clearly, then people are going to be going out wondering why they came and. And that's the danger of trying to wing it. That's why preparation is so important.

Kate Gilbert [00:27:46]:
And for introverts, I, yeah, I absolutely, I prepare all the time. I will also rehearse it. I recommend rehearsing it out loud. You can look into a mirror, some people think, look into a mirror. You can do that for your body language, just to see that you're, you know, you're not closing up your body language, that you're not tensing yourself. You can also record yourself. Sometimes it's good to record yourself. And listen to a bat as well to see if your voice is alive, whether it's got intonation in it, where, where it goes up and down, you know, and it has melody to it or, or if it's kind of flatlining and quite monotone, that's a really useful exercise.

Kate Gilbert [00:28:25]:
So, yeah, I do think, I do think introverts particularly, it's really, really helpful for us to plan it, not over plan because that can exhaust us as well. And often we have jobs alongside having to give a presentation and we can't give weeks and months to it. So don't over prepare and, and, and hurt yourself and take too much time doing it. I think the, the main thing is to make sure you're clear on who your audience is, what they need, what your key message to them is, and then put it into some kind of structure with a beginning and middle and end and then rehearse and rehearse out loud. And if you can find a kind friend or partner or someone who's going to watch and listen, listen to it for you.

David Hall [00:29:14]:
Yeah, yeah, definitely. Like you, like you said, there's so many different, there's so many different personality factors. I focus on introversion, extroversion because there's so much misunderstanding. But when it comes to preparation, find what works for you and do that. You know, you might have a friend and they might prepare completely differently. Find what works for you and, and, and do that preparation.

Kate Gilbert [00:29:41]:
Yeah, absolutely. And in the constraints of how, how much time you have, how much energy you have as well. I recently did a talk, it was in the style of a TED talk, actually. It was a nine minute talk. And it got to, I, I finished writing it about three days before the actual event, which I wouldn't recommend. So if you've got a big talk like that, and it was quite an important talk, I would probably take three months. I would, I would recommend to other people to take three months. I did it in three weeks.

Kate Gilbert [00:30:10]:
But then I've done this a lot and I know what I'm doing, but that's not something I would recommend. So I gave myself three, three days to learn it. It was three pages of dialogue, nine minutes. And I, after rehearsing it through about two or three times, I was mentally exhausted and I thought to myself, I could speak, spend my whole day. The day before, I could spend my whole day just going over this, rehearsing it again and again and again. And I thought, actually what I know I need is energy for tomorrow, so I'm going to rehearse it twice. Then I'm going to look through it, take it a little bit section by section and then I'm going to go and rest. I'm going to go and get a coffee or I'm going to go for a run and do something that, that will energize me so that when I wake up I feel good.

Kate Gilbert [00:30:58]:
Not spent, not having spent a whole day exhausting my brain going over and over these three pages of words and dialogue so that, you know, I wasn't tired the next day. So particularly as introverts, I think it's about managing your energy. And I. The other point that I would make on that is that if you have a presentation or something important coming up that you, you know, you need energy for, be really plan your days before, make sure you haven't crammed them full. Make sure you haven't done loads of socializing because you don't want to. You need your tank to be full, not on empty. And I often find as well, if I've done a lot of networking, a lot of socializing, if I've hosted a lot of events and I haven't given myself space where I've got an evening off to have a bath, to spend some time on my own processing everything that's happened, I will really struggle to go and do something the day after if I've got to, because it takes a lot of energy to be on a stage. I don't know if anyone who's listening has ever done teaching, but when you teach and teachers will say this when they get home, they are so exhausted because being in front of a lot of people, you are giving your energy and they are like energy vampires.

Kate Gilbert [00:32:20]:
They are taking it. So expect to be very tired after a presentation. It's not just the preparation that kind of takes more energy than you would normally give, but also actually the act of standing on a stage and delivering something to many people will be draining. For extroverts, it could be completely different for them. Maybe they're on an absolute high afterwards for weeks afterwards. I always find after I've done a show, I've hosted a big event. I hosted a big event to 800 people back in July. And the next day I wouldn't get out of bed.

Kate Gilbert [00:32:59]:
I was zapped, completely zapped. But I, that's, I, that's me. I know I need to clear my diary sometimes the next day, if it's a, if it's a really big event.

David Hall [00:33:07]:
Yeah, that's so key. And I think those are some of the key Things for me is learning how to prepare, you know, telling yourself you got this and you're. There's a reason why you're doing it. But then managing your energy is so important. It's. You brought up teachers. I've had some great teachers on this show that are introverts. And yeah, you know, they love what they're doing, they love the teaching part, but they need a break and they need to plan.

David Hall [00:33:32]:
You know, like, one teacher would come in early before everybody else to set, set aside time. Or maybe a different teacher would stay later, but with some quiet or, you know, look at their prep periods. So there's so many things and like, yeah, go ahead.

Kate Gilbert [00:33:47]:
You're absolutely. With preparation. I'm just thinking for myself now as well. When I used to teach, and I used to teach acting and public speaking and I would do the same, I'd get in early or I'd stay a bit later. So that I knew it actually gave me confidence to know I've. I've got a framework. I know what I'm going to be doing in the morning. I've also been in the situations where I've.

Kate Gilbert [00:34:07]:
I've turned up somewhere and they go, you're doing this now. And you go, you're in that room. And I'm like, okay, cool, I've got it. I've got the confidence. I'm going to use my creativity and my energy, my spontaneity, and it's going to be a good challenge for me. I kind of do like that as well. But if it's something that's important and often as soon as I get, you know, if I get. If someone asked me to do a workshop for them, for example, the moment I come off the call, I will, probably that day I will start putting an outline of some ideas down and then I might not do it because I quite like to do things with a bit of pressure.

Kate Gilbert [00:34:37]:
So I'll leave it for a few weeks and then I'll probably start working on it the week before or something. But I can relax because I know I've got a framework. I know I've already got that in place. So I don't know if that's all introverts, but I think actually having that planning, knowing that you've got something in place gives us that extra boost of confidence.

David Hall [00:34:59]:
Yeah, I do something similar. So I prepare the outline and think about what I want to say, you know, as soon as I can. But then in the days leading up to the presentation, I get new ideas and try and Capture those as I get them, like, oh, you should tell this story or you should say this. And so, you know, again, letting our introvert brains do do their work.

Kate Gilbert [00:35:20]:
That's it. And they are wonderfully creative and I've certainly done talks before where I've thought of something on the way there and I've used it and I, and I've really enjoyed that because it's been spontaneous and you know, when you can be spontaneous on stage, it's so refreshing. It's refreshing for the audience as well. But it does take that level of knowing that you're safe to be up there and that comes through experience, I think.

David Hall [00:35:48]:
Yeah. Kate, this has been a brilliant conversation. Is there anything else you want to share today?

Kate Gilbert [00:35:54]:
I don't think so, only that I have my book but that's going to be coming out hopefully next year and I'm going to be putting in all of my insight from, from kind of being shy and underconfident as a young person to finding my confidence and working with hundreds, maybe thousands of people now actually who've also, also had that fear of getting, getting on stage and that lack of confidence and have overcome it. So that's all going, that's going, all going in the book. And obviously my final word is to everyone, everyone can do public speaking. There are, it's a learned skill and there are ways and sometimes it's mindset things that are blocking us, but once we identify what those are and we get them out of the way, we are free to express, free to get on stage and share our knowledge and our wisdom.

David Hall [00:36:42]:
Yeah, beautifully said and we'll look forward to your book. Where can people currently find out about the great work that you do?

Kate Gilbert [00:36:51]:
Sure. So I'm, my website is kategilbert.co.uk I'm also on LinkedIn. You can find me on there. Kate Gilbert, public speaking coach and speaker. I'm on Instagram as well. KateGilbert talks. So yeah, any of those ways. Follow me.

Kate Gilbert [00:37:06]:
I'm often doing workshops online things as well, so yeah, and I do one to ones and workshops and speaking events.

David Hall [00:37:14]:
All right, well thanks again.

Kate Gilbert [00:37:16]:
Yeah, it's been a pleasure. Thank you for having me.

David Hall [00:37:18]:
David, thank you so much for joining me. I appreciate you. I hope you take the time to explore other episodes and learn from other amazing guests. Remember, if you're interested in getting to know yourself better, there is now a free Typefinder personality assessment on the Quiet and Strong website. This free assessment will give you a brief report including the four letter Myers Briggs Code. I'LL add a link in the show notes and I'd love to connect with you. Reach out to daviduyandstrong.com or check out the quietandstrong.com website, which includes blog posts and links to social media for Quiet and strong and much more. Send me topics or guests you would like to see on the show.

David Hall [00:38:00]:
So many great things about being an introvert and so we need those to be understood. Get to know your introverted strengths and needs and be strong.