Hello Homemakers , and welcome to the Art of Home podcast , where we are exploring how Homemakers cultivate a place to belong . I'm your host , allison Weeks . I'm a wife , I'm a mom to four grown kids , granny to one baby boy , and I have been practicing the Art of Home for 31 years now . Well , I just got back from a trip to visit family in Florida and there is an army of workers at my house . We are having some landscape fixed , actually in our backyard , just to kind of finish up some things out there that needed to be taken care of , but there's like a bobcat land mover thing going up and down the driveway , so if you hear a lot of noise , that's what's going on back there . I've got suitcases I need to unload . There's guys everywhere doing some stonework and they're chiseling stones outside . It's a little bit chaotic over here , but I needed to get this episode finished up and put out into the interwebs so that it can be ready , and ready for you to download and listen to your first thing in the morning . Today marks week two in season 16 plus and remember , I'm calling it season 16 plus because instead of our normal six , six episode season yes , okay , I'm getting my words mixed up . Instead of our normal six episodes in a season , you will be getting eight episodes this season all of listeners just like you , in all different stages , all different ages of their home making journey , so today's episode is going to be a really great one . There's a lot here .
Speaker 1This is an episode with Nicole Pace . She's an in the trenches mama . She's got two little boys who are just full of energy and keep her very , very busy . She's homeschooling . She is doing all the things , including cooking , basically everything from scratch , because one of her sons has severe allergies , several of which are life threatening , and we do talk quite a bit about that , just how that has impacted her home making life . Nicole has been a great cheerleader for the show for several years . She , I think , found us kind of near the beginning of the art of home podcast when we ran an episode with my friend , lori Mott , who has a special needs child that she is Carly's , in her thirties now and she cares for her full time , and it just read . That episode resonated with Nicole and she reached out just to tell me how impactful it was for her personally and her her story with her son and how it encouraged her so much so , and ever since then I hear from Nicole regularly . She's just , she's a great cheerleader for the show and I just I was so honored to sit down and get to hear her story of home and she has so much great information to share , lots of ideas , lots of inspiration , lots of wisdom , and so I know that you guys are going to be challenged and blessed and encouraged by Nicole's story today .
Speaker 1If you are new here , thank you for tuning in . I am so glad that you found us . We do something here called Homemaker Happy Mail . That is our little weekly newsletter and it goes out every Friday when we are in the midst of a regular season and that is how you can get your hands on detailed show notes for today's episode . And you want to make sure that you get those show notes because Nicole shares so much information with us and I'm going to put as much of that as I can into the newsletter so I can get all of that into your hands . So if you're not signed up , it's very simple , it's totally free . Just hop over to theartofhomepodcastcom slash , subscribe and that will put you on our mailing list and you will get that Homemaker Happy Mail first thing on Friday morning .
Speaker 1Well , I'm going to close it down here and get on with the episode , because it's a little bit longer and I want to make sure that we can get to all of that without taking up too much of your day , but thank you for spending some time with us today . I'm really honored that you chose to do that and you have entrusted this time to us , and I pray that it is time well spent . I know that it will be Whatever you are applying your hands to as you listen today . I know that you will enjoy Nicole's story of home .
Welcome to the art of home . I'm here with my friend , nicole Pace , long time listener . She is an in the trenches homemaker , and we're going to hear all about her story of home . Before we do that , though , nicole , I'm going to just let you say hi and introduce yourself to the audience . Tell us a little bit about who you are today .
Speaker 2Hi , allison , and hello to the listeners . My name is Nicole . As Allison mentioned , I am first and foremost a daughter of the king , and I am also a wife to Shane for six and a half years , mother to two rambunctious and joyful little boys ages three and five , and I'm a proud homemaker and aspiring homesteader .
Speaker 1Ooh , homesteading . That's exciting . Is that a new development or like a long time dream ? Newish , like the last couple of years , okay , so have you taken any steps towards that ? Yet you do have chickens or anything yet .
Speaker 2So we're discussing chickens . We have an egg allergy in the house , so that is a debate right now . We're kind of waiting until he gets old enough to understand the restrictions on that . But the husband has okayed the chickens when the time comes and definitely delved into gardening and making our own products for the home . We make our own laundry soap , we make our own soaps , make our own candles and just like moving more towards self-sufficiency . A lot of cooking and baking Sourdough . We've tackled sourdough this year and succeeded after many failed attempts . Wow , congratulations . I gave up a couple of times . I really didn't think it was ever going to happen , but me and sourdough have made our peace .
Speaker 1Oh good , I'm so glad . Well , I'm sure we're going to talk a lot about all of those things as we get into your story , because I know probably that stems from your journey with allergies in your home and we're going to get to that . But before we do that , let's just go all the way back to the beginning , and why don't you just tell us about when you first became a homemaker ? When do you think that was ? And when you did , did you have any skills ?
Speaker 2I think I first became a homemaker when I first moved out of my parents' house and into my first apartment after college . I really enjoyed crafting my own place . I've always enjoyed hospitality and entertaining , so those are things that I jumped into really quickly . And decorating and just creating a place of my own really early on , that was around when I was about 22 years old , and I did come into it with some skills . My parents were fantastic at teaching us how to clean . Our house was immaculate at all times . I learned every product and trick . I learned how to schedule that cleaning time . I learned how to keep things clean , how to value my things . But even more than that , they were unbelievable entertainers , big into hospitality . I was helping my mom throw these elaborate , beautiful parties my dad too , actually . He was really involved in them as well From a very early age . My mom is a bunco player and they have elaborate themed parties , and so she taught me really early on about loving others through hospitality and food and presentation and decor . So I brought those skills .
Speaker 1I love that . That's awesome that you had that growing up . For those that don't know what bunco is , maybe we could explain what that is .
Speaker 2You might have to explain it , because I'm not allowed to go yet I'm not old enough , really .
Speaker 1What's the parameter ?
Speaker 2She is in a well-oiled machine bunco group . They've been together for 25 years . Oh , wow , yeah , and so the outsiders , I think . Once a year we get invited to a secret . Daughter's can come .
Speaker 1They have to blindfold you . You can't see how to get there .
Speaker 2But it is cool to watch and be a part of . But I've only been once and I didn't really understand the game . Okay , so you might have to explain it .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's a dice game and it's very social because you don't really there's different roles depending on which region you live in , because some people are like they only ever roll for sixes , but you're basically every time you roll you're in groups of four around a table . So it's sort of like a traveling card game would work , but it's with dice and you're always rolling for a certain number or a certain combination of numbers and then you whittle it down to the people who are winning or whatever . At the end , whoever has the most of the number that you were trying to get gets a prize or money . Some people play for money . You all bring 20 bucks at the beginning and then they dole out the money at the end based on the scores . So it's super fun because you don't really have to think too much and so you can talk while you're playing . It's very social .
Speaker 2Yeah , that's what I remember the most , so maybe that's why I never picked up on the rules . Because you were so busy talking there was a lot of social , which was great .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , it is a really fun thing to do with neighborhood groups , though , like it's a great way to meet your neighbors , and so , if anybody's interested , you know that's a great idea that you could show some hospitality by hosting a Bunka group at your home . It's super fun , yeah .
Speaker 2So she actually started it was a neighborhood group and now , after 25 years , they've all moved away . Not a single one of them is still in the neighborhood and they are still together and they take trips together . I mean , it's made some really incredible bonds . So I would encourage anyone who's interested to definitely look into it , because it's something special .
Speaker 1Yeah , that's really cool . Maybe we'll have to put the basic Bunka rules in the newsletter after your episode air for something .
Speaker 2Oh , that'd be fun .
Speaker 1Yeah , okay , so you did have some . Definitely , you knew about hospitality and you knew how to clean . So what was the skill that you had a steep learning curve for ?
Speaker 2Oh my gosh cooking . My poor mom . She tried so hard to get me to learn to cook and to want to learn to cook . I hated it . Growing up , I didn't understand why anyone would spend this much time to prepare a meal that is gone in 12 seconds and then you have to spend an equal amount of time cleaning it up , and I just I could not understand why anyone would do that . But God has used food allergies to sanctify me and train me to be a rather good cook now so , and actually has made me fall in love with it . So cooking was number one , absolute steepest , and then budgeting . We recently moved to the East Texas area from Fort Worth and we kind of decided to start working on a completely debt-free lifestyle . We wanted to get a smaller mortgage , pay it off , and so we , for the first time , have had to stick to a budget , my husband and I both and so that has been a learning curve that we are still navigating .
Speaker 1What are what's maybe a what's been a helpful tool for you in the area of budgeting , like did you do Dave Ramsey or did you what ? What did you guys do ? We did ?
Speaker 2So we actually , when we got married , the day we got back from our honeymoon , we went to our first Dave Ramsey class , and so we actually literally started our marriage with Dave Ramsey and we paid off all of our debt . We were completely debt-free for our entire marriage until my darling baby came . And then , you know , new moms we wanted to buy all the things , and so we did , and so now we're in Dave Ramsey a second time , just retackling those baby steps . So that's been a huge one for us .
Speaker 1Good , I know a lot of people . Well , I've never , we never did that , but I know a lot of people have done it and really , really , it was brought them a lot of value , yeah , okay , well , so who or what would you say has had a big influence on your homemaking ?
Speaker 2A lot of things actually . So my parents I mentioned . They taught me early on about cleaning and entertaining . My aunt Brenda was the kind of homemaker role model that I always looked up to . She was . I would go and spend some time with her during the summers and she had three kids that were the same age as my brother and I and she was the quintessential homemaker . She was always wallpapering a room or she was so crafty she would make like wreaths from scratch and like , do all of these beautiful decorations . She would always cook you know , cookies from scratch and let us help , and so she has definitely always been a huge influence in the homemaking part .
Speaker 2My grandmother was big on hosting the large family gatherings . Our family is ginormous . They're like my big fat Greek wedding and they're equally as loud and boisterous and fun , and I just have such lovely memories growing up with 10 million people around you know , a Thanksgiving table or a Christmas tree . So that the Huga movement a few years ago , which you've had some guests talk about the Huga movement , it's a Scandinavian word that evokes a sense of calm and a sense of peace and just like it's also kind of the sometimes called the slow movement . I discovered it about three years ago and really we really started to adopt that into our lifestyle and that has really influenced our homemaking a lot .
Speaker 2And lastly you , because when I moved here to East Texas two years ago , I found your show and I had some basic skills but I did not have the courage or the knowledge to , or the gumption to , reach out to other women and seek out people to help me learn to sew or quilt or crochet , and you and your show really just encourage me to not be afraid , just reach out and just start something . And I have and I've gained all these skills . So thank you , alison .
Speaker 1You're welcome . Oh , that makes my heart happy . I'm so glad to hear that . What about expectations ? What are some things that surprised you about homemaking ?
Speaker 2Oh , Alison , how hard raising kids was going to be . I was a teacher for 13 years prior to having kids , and a coach , a cheer coach . I've been through the trenches , alison . I've seen some stuff . I was a middle school teacher Wow , I was a theater director , so I saw all three grades . I had kids for multiple years .
Speaker 2I really felt like I had really in the trenches training and I was ready to go for this parenting thing . I had helped to raised my niece , who was the perfect child who just sat quietly and colored and like , followed directions and just took naps lovingly every time you asked her to and I just thought , man , I am such a good parent , I am nailing this . And then I had my two boys , who are the most lovely muddy bundles of energy that have ever walked the earth , and they have really , really pushed me to learn new skills and and to adapt my expectations . So I think that's probably the biggest one . And then the second one is how much I love slow , simple , modest , old-fashioned living .
Speaker 2I was raised in a really wealthy household with , you know , big house and nice .
Speaker 2I got a brand-new car when I was 16 and we really wanted for nothing and and I really thought , going into my adult life , that that was the trajectory I was gonna be on , you know . But with this last move I've really appreciated we decided to . We bought half the square footage that we had in our other house because we wanted , like I said , we wanted it to be debt-free , we wanted it to be smaller . We had a two story home and with babies going up and down the stairs 86,000 times a day was not fun . So we decided to go much smaller and it has been a joy just being that close to my boys and just I could . There's no where I can be in the house where I don't know where they are . I feel so , so confident and so comfortable in my skin here and and I love it . And that surprised me because I really thought you weren't successful unless you were living in this big you know big mansion house and fast-paced DFW area .
Speaker 1So it oh , yes , yes , so you grew up . Did you grow up in in the Dallas-Fort Worth I ?
Speaker 2was raised in , or I was born in Kansas , but I was raised in Southlake , so yeah , right by the Dallas-Fort Worth Airport and it was . I watched it just explode . We came here right before it , it broke open and then it was just super fast , yeah .
Speaker 1So yeah , it is very . It's a . For those that don't know , it's just a rule . I don't even know how to describe Dallas .
Speaker 2It's like a whole other planet it is a thing , and actually it's very different between Dallas and Fort Worth . Those are like two different countries . Oh so , yes , so yeah , dallas is very artsy and up-and-coming and like hip and cool , and Fort Worth is very nostalgic and like art and history and rich like cultural . They're both rich and culture , but it's it's . There are two different worlds , for sure yeah , but it's definitely a .
Speaker 1I mean , there's there's certainly poor sections of these cities , but there's a lot of money . Yeah , there's a lot of money there and , and you know , just that's a kind of maybe an expected lifestyle . Absolutely most people would , would try to attain to there , because that's just what you do . So , yeah , I can . I can imagine how that would have been quite a change for you to do what you're doing now , but I'm glad .
Speaker 1I'm glad that you love it . That's great . Yeah , that's so great because everybody , like we always talk about you need to find what works best for your family right , yeah , yeah yeah , okay . So what's an expectation that you had to let go of for the well-being of yourself and your family ?
Speaker 2oh , pristine cleanness . Cleanliness , excuse me , um , I eat . My husband and I are both extremely clean people and when we got married , everything matched . Everything was beautiful . When we built our first house together before we had kids , we got rid of all of our mishmash marriage early marriage furniture and we bought all matching stuff for the house and it was so beautiful . And then we had kids and toddlers and and that's another thing I learned moving out here you know we bought an older house versus a brand new house that we had built , and just the weight that was lifted off my shoulders of not caring if they , you know , ran into a wall or if they got dirty , muddy , hand prints on stuff , that was a huge weight that I didn't even realize I was carrying . So the cleanliness was a huge one .
Speaker 2And then the other one which I feel like I'm gonna get in trouble for is getting dressed every day , and I know there's a lot of people that have come on your podcast and I know you too advocate for getting dressed and putting on the makeup , and I I love that and I think there's definitely a season and that some people that really do well with that .
Speaker 2For me , I am more stressed about keeping myself looking decent than doing the work that I need to do during the day . So if I get up and I do my makeup and I put up my hair , cute , I'm hot , it's in my face , I'm sweating , I'm smearing my eyeliner and , like I said , I have two muddy boys , and when I say muddy , I mean they spend their time 99% of the time naked and in the mud pit in our backyard and I'm so much we're just always covered , and or I'm baking something and covered head to toe with flour , and so it's just for me , dressing for the life that we are in right now . I have my yoga pants and I found some matching yoga shorts that have pockets , and I got my my mom uniform , my my mom bun , and you know , that's how .
Speaker 2I roll out of bed , and that's how we go as long , look I as long .
Speaker 1I'm not gonna give you any flack for that as long as you are being intention .
Speaker 1You're being intentional about why you choose that way , and that's the difference between just sort of falling into slovenliness , yeah , of like , I just hate my life and I don't want to even bother . Like , why even bother ? Because you know that's coming from a place of almost like desperation and in depression , rather than no , I know that my dress is probably gonna get ruined by the mud from the mud pit , so I'm gonna like focus on other things . Yeah , totally fine , all right , totally .
Speaker 2Alison . Seal of approval . I can , yeah soundly tonight no , oh my gosh .
Speaker 1No , okay , but thank you for your honesty . I really appreciate that we gotta be real here . Okay , let's talk about those lovely
balls of mud and noise . Let's talk about parenting . So I mean , it definitely sounds like we already know that the addition of the kids have brought challenges and an enrichment . So let's just talk a little bit about that . How , how has bringing your boys into your family brought challenges and enrichments to your home making ?
Speaker 2it just completely shifted my priorities . You know that all the things I thought that mattered just do not matter , and things like the food allergies you know what starts as a death sentence in your mind has been used by God to teach me how to cook and teach me how to fall in love with cooking , and so that has completely enriched my home . Making my son off also suffers from some special needs and and that those struggles have been incredibly sanctifying , really , just calling me to fall on my knees and ask for God's help and God's direction , and he's constantly refining me , and so that's been huge . Another thing is the , the slow living , you know , with kids .
Speaker 2As an educator , I had a lot of thoughts about what I wanted my kids education to look like and what I didn't want it to look like , and we felt really drawn to the Montessori philosophy very slow , very hands-on , it's pure materials , you know just it's not loud plastic toys , it's not loud music and bright colors , it's , it's just very soft and delicate and that has all really enriched our home making , because it's kind of , it's kind of bloomed and that really is how our whole life has has become engulfed in that . It's it's gotten slow , it's gotten soft , it's gotten holistic . So all of those things came about because of the kids because , like I said , I was a completely different person with completely different ideas before they came along yeah , that's interesting .
Speaker 1So are you planning on homeschooling ? We do homeschool , yes . So I was looking at their back , at their oh , they're three and five . Okay , so you have like a kindergarten , or is he is ?
Speaker 2technically a kindergartner . I've been homeschooling him with Montessori . So in Montessori you really kind of start at three , and one of the challenges of food allergies is he has so many . He was rejected from every Montessori school we tried to put him in they just said we can't keep him safe . And you know , being the mama bear type a that I was , I was like my child will not be denied his Montessori education . So we sold all of our office furniture and I created for him a Montessori school in our home and so he's been doing that since he was three .
Speaker 2And then when we moved here , we shifted away from Montessori . We still do a lot of Montessori concepts , but we did adopt some more traditional curriculum to help with reading and math concepts , because it's , you know , being an educator , I want to make sure we're really nailing those concepts . And then my three-year-old is just starting homeschool this year and he's so excited because he couldn't wait to be three , because I said you start homeschool at three and so every day for a year he was like am I three ? He is now three and he has gotten to start homeschool .
Speaker 1That's awesome , cool , okay . Well , now what about with their participation in the homemaking side of things ? How are you encouraging them and how do they get to help you in your practice of the art ?
Speaker 2yeah . So that kind of like harkens back to the Montessori stuff as well . It's very hands-on life skills , so they're involved in everything . I mean , if I'm vacuuming , I'll vacuum a couple strokes to show them what to do and then I literally let them vacuum and they love it . It's not indentured servitude . I promise they love it . And we've taught them how to clean and squeegee windows . We've taught them how to unload the dishwasher , how to fold laundry , and they love every minute of it . They feel valued and they feel like they're participating in our home .
Speaker 2But the biggest part is cooking . They love to cook , especially my youngest . He latched on to cooking . He's really very passionate about it and so I almost never cook without him . He wants to help with every single meal and we we got all the tools . The again Montessori suppliers give you things like small plastic knives and we taught them those skills early on . So my kids know how to peel carrot . My three-year-old knows how to peel a carrot . My five-year-old knows how to chop vegetables and can do those with adapted tools . You know I'm not giving him a butcher knife , but adapted tools . He can . He can help do that prep without hardly any help from me . So they're , they're becoming very self-sufficient because they've been alongside me the whole time .
Speaker 1I love that , so okay . So there's . I have a couple questions . So there's Montessori specific tools for , for even training kids in household things yes , so the the three to six .
Speaker 2So Montessori concept with schooling is it's mixed-stage group . So the first stage group is three to six years old . They're all in the same classroom together and it's all about life skills . So they don't teach . They may teach some academic concepts at that level , but it's not going to look anything like you're thinking of . But the three to six classes almost entirely based on life skills . So yeah , there are suppliers like I can't thank him , I think one's called Montessori resources and there's several different ones but and they make things like child-sized .
Speaker 2So my children have used child-sized glass plates since they were very young and there's a lot of people . Even my husband was like , what are you doing with the glass plates ? And Maria Montessori , who came up with the Montessori philosophy she really encouraged parents and and people who work with children to allow them to be themselves and that they will . They will gather the necessary skills just innately . So like when I handed my children a glass plate , they were delicate with the glass plate and I have rambunctious , crazy boys like no , not to say that things haven't gotten broken on accident , but I mean they've been really very good with the stuff with the knives .
Speaker 2We started with a little crinkle cutter with a handle . At maybe two years old I mean very early , like one and a half two years old in the high chair they'd get a banana and I give them the little crinkle cutter , which cannot in any way hurt them , and they just experiment . And then , once they're a little older , you know , I teach them how to hold the banana and how to make slices , and then we move up from there and so , yeah , the Montessori places have all kinds of child-sized , real tools to help with that . They have brooms and dust pans and mops and they have squeegees and squirt bottles , and so , yeah , we've , we've incorporated those things into our homes . So my kids basically have a child-sized set of everything that I have that is awesome .
Speaker 1I had no idea that they had all of those resources . Well , maybe I'll definitely want to get some recommendations from you and we can also put that in the new shirt notes for people to look into that as well . So okay , let's talk about priorities . So what are some practical steps that you take to set and keep your priorities in order , making time for God , your marriage , your health and all ?
Speaker 2of that , I had to shift my thinking a lot . So the quiet time has always been really important to me and it has always felt really clunky in my household since babies came . It was easy when I had little babies because I was nursing at all hours of the night so I was constantly reading my Bible and I kind of had that time . Once they stopped nursing and started walking , time just disappeared and so for a few years it's felt really clunky . When we moved here , and really just the last year or so , I realized that my kids do absolutely their best during the day if we start the day outside playing doing something physical . So my kids love to ride bikes . Oh , that's another thing with the Mono , sorry . We started doing a balance bike with my oldest when he was like one and a half and he was riding without training wheels by four so so the balance bike is the one that doesn't have .
Speaker 1It doesn't have pedals , and they just yeah , yeah , um little things like that .
Speaker 2But so they love to ride their bikes and so I have just started taking all of my quiet time resources . I have a little basket , take it out to my front porch with my coffee and their hour long play time out front is my quiet time . And so I've , and I figured out like that's a huge blessing that I didn't even realize was there , because I love being outside , I love they don't bother me because they're engulfed in their own play , they're getting physical , they're getting nature , they're getting that natural sunlight and all that stuff , and so it's a win win , win . So adjusting how I think about what certain things should look like like a quiet time . You know , a lot of people get up really early . Our house is so small , as I mentioned , that our bedrooms are right next to the living room . If I turn on a light it's gonna shine through their bedroom and they will be up , and so that didn't work for me , so I had to figure out something else .
Speaker 2Other priorities date nights . We , when we moved to East Texas , we left all of our family behind in the FW and out here there really aren't any babysitters there's . Out here people have really big families and so a lot of priority is spent staying at home , so there's not a lot of call for babysitters and there's not a lot of people doing it . So we didn't have a babysitter for two years , and so we had to come up with creative date ideas . So we did things like writing a bunch of silly ideas on sticks and then drawing a stick and having an in-home date night . You know we do things like . We purchased online country dancing lessons so we can country dance in the hall . That's my husband's idea . He's very romantic . That's so fun . Yeah , I hope that doesn't embarrass him . I don't think any of his bro friends are gonna be listening to this , so I think it's okay . Probably not but yeah .
Speaker 2So we did things like that to prioritize date nights when we didn't have anyone to help us . And then health . I had to just ask for time . My husband is not a morning person and it's kind of been difficult to find time to work out on my own . But recently I just asked him . I said look , I know that this is not your real house . Like first thing in the morning , I just need an hour . And he was so gracious and supportive . He's like okay , I can make this work for you . So having the courage to ask for it has been huge , because I think as homemakers sometimes we feel like we have to do everything and we have to do it ourselves and that we don't wanna burden our husband or like oh , he has to go to work all day , so I don't wanna make him get up an hour earlier . But I felt like it was contributing to our household in a much more positive way that I started with a walker going to the gym or whatever and I got myself in the right headspace . It helps everybody . So Absolutely .
Speaker 1That's very well said , thanks .
Speaker 2And then the last thing is we with school . As I mentioned , we home school , and I told you my son has special needs . One of the things that I learned in teaching in the public schools is sometimes you have to take things off the page . So when we are doing workbook , he struggles with ADHD , and so sitting and getting is not something that he loves to do , and so we oftentimes I have to be creative and think of ways I can do the same concept in a way that is physical , in a way that is off the page , and so , for instance , one of our lessons last week was it had piano keys on the page and they were supposed to quote play the piano while touching the letters , and I was like no , we're not gonna do that . So I got a dry erase and wrote the letters on our actual piano and he had him get up and actually play and make the sound , and so little things like that have helped to prioritize his learning by also meeting his needs where he needs me to meet him .
Speaker 1Yeah , man , these are fabulous ideas . I love that . I love your getting out in the morning with the boys and letting them do their outside play time while you do your quiet time . That is so smart .
Speaker 2It's huge . It's huge for we've seen huge dividends with it , with the ADHD , letting him start and getting that physical and that sensory first thing .
Speaker 1It's a game changer . Okay , well , I'm guessing maybe you're limiting media pretty seriously in your house . I don't know , I could be wrong , Based on your philosophy of learning and then the special needs that your son is dealing with . But just what is your approach ? Do you allow media in your home ? How do you personally deal with your consumption of media , social media , all of that ?
Speaker 2Well , my personal consumption of media is very love hate . I delete all my socials daily and then reinstall them the next day . I definitely struggle with addiction , and so I've really had to try to figure out ways that I can be on there in a health way or in a healthy way , excuse me . So one of the things I did with my socials is I curate my feeds so that I ensure that everything I see is life-giving . I have unfollowed anyone who is negative , anyone who is not giving me something that will improve my life . I unfollowed which I love about Instagram because you can completely curate that feed . So my Instagram is all homesteaders , homemakers , godly women and homeschoolers . So everything I see is an inspiration . And if there's ever anything that sneaks in , like , there's the whole quote , unquote real mom movement , where there's a lot of negativity about husbands and kids and how hard things are like . That's absolutely true , but I don't need to see that on my feed because that just fuels my own tendency towards negativity , and so I unfollow those things and I don't allow those things in my headspace because it's easy to go to man , yeah , my job is really hard . My job is 17 hours a day , like . Yeah , of course it is , but I don't wanna prescribe to that from social media as well . So , and I don't allow negativity on like my Facebook , I don't any comments that are in any way negative or cutting down me or anything like that immediately deleted and I'll have a private conversation with that person . Just say like , look , I don't want that on my page . So that's how I handle my media For my kids .
Speaker 2We are extremely strict about media . We they don't have . They have a tablet . We bought , as I mentioned , all of our families in DFW , so we do have long car rides . That's the only time my kids are permitted tablets . Or my son also has quite a few doctor's appointments . So helping with doctor's appointments , wait times , that's where the tablets come in , but that what's on it is extremely restricted to educational content only , and TV is where I think people would say I'm the most insane . We're very strict about content . My son , because of the way his mind works , he gravitates towards sometimes the negative things in shows , and so we don't do any villains , we don't do any disrespectful language , we don't do words like stupid or idiot or so . It's actually really hard because even G rated I don't know if I'm allowed to say brand names , but there's a streaming service . It's very popular for okay , yeah , you can say it .
Speaker 1We're not sponsored here , say whatever you want .
Speaker 2Disney is just really disappointed me in my parenthood because I grew up with Disney and I thought I'm gonna back before streaming .
Speaker 2In the olden days we had DVDs and I thought my kids will own every Disney DVD and I just have been so disappointed with Lilo and Stitch like what a cute little show . And that was our very first quote unquote . Bad word was stupid head and he learned that from Lilo and Stitch and so we really don't allow . I mean , we're pretty , pretty , pretty crazy strict about what they watch . We don't allow romance . I don't want any media influencing what my kids think about romance . I think I was very influenced by the princess , prince dynamic and I just . Disney has no place in teaching my children about Godly love so fast , paced and loud . We're very touchy about visual and audio stimuli Because of his ADHD and even Shane and I as adults , we are very protective of what we allow in our own minds .
Speaker 2You know the Bible says to guard your hearts and minds . We don't do any horror . We don't do crime shows , murder shows . We don't do gratuitous nudity or sex . You know all those things just tend to . They just start the wheels spinning and it's not again . It's not life giving . If it's not life giving , we try not to put it in , because my husband is a big proponent of what you put in is what you get out , and he's great at the leadership on that .
Speaker 1So yeah , that's good . Yeah , there's a verse that I've always sort of held in my heart regarding this thing , exactly what you're talking about . I can't , I don't remember the address , but it says I will walk blamelessly before the Lord in my house , I will not set before my eyes any vile thing . Oh , I love that . Yeah , that's the translation . I memorized it in , because to me that so speaks to what we're talking about . Like it really matters what you set before your eyes and before your children's eyes .
Speaker 1As far as our desire to walk blamelessly before the Lord in our homes .
Okay , okay , let's switch over to Temptations and Challenges , because we're already kind of there . But first I wanna ask you for your personal journey as a homemaker . What of the following , which one of these three did you struggle or do you struggle with the most , and what has God taught you through that ? So A is comparison to other women . B I am just a homemaker . Just a homemaker , it's not a real job . Or C superwoman trying to do everything .
Speaker 2I wiggle between A and C , but I am a recovering people pleaser so I definitely have to sway with A , that I'm comparing to other people , especially other moms , moms with kids that don't have special needs and family members .
Speaker 2You know , if you don't have a food allergy kid , if you don't have a special needs kid , you just don't understand .
Speaker 2And my child will never fit in the box of everyone else's child .
Speaker 2And that's been a really hard struggle for me because I took a lot of that on myself , like I'm not doing a good enough job as a mother , otherwise my kid would be doing this and I think and of course for two or three years you have no idea that there's something bigger going on there . You know he was only diagnosed with ADHD two years ago and he's five . So I mean , you start to see things and you start to wonder and people start to say well , you know that's not normal and you always have this pit in your stomach but you still always blame yourself as a mom or at least I did and just like why is my kid having these temper tantrums all the time ? Why is my kid biting ? Why is my kid hitting and all these other kids are not doing these things , and so those comparisons absolutely wrecked me and I'm still working on it constantly . But the how kids should be has been like a constant thing that hangs over my head of expectations that I'm battling against .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 1I think , whatever , I don't know that . This is probably the most common one . People say that they struggle with it's between A and C and most of us can say at one time or another we do have to fight comparison constantly , actually , and whether you're dealing with a situation like you or just comparing how your kid is behaving in any situation or the choices that your teenager is making or whatever , it's so easy to look at what other people are doing , but again , you're comparing their outsize to your insides , like you're comparing what you see on the surface in that family or in that child's behavior out in public , but you don't know what's going on behind closed doors , right , I mean like you really don't know . And so that's why comparison is just , it's insidious , because it's never a fair comparison . It's never a fair comparison , no matter what . We shouldn't compare anyway , but it's never a fair comparison .
Speaker 1So well , I want to talk more . I want to make sure that you have time . We've alluded to this a lot , talking about your son struggles with special needs and diet , and this is the special challenges section of this section of the questions , and I want to give you some time to talk about just a little bit about your journey there and how that's led you to start this business , and some of the other things that we wanted to cover in this topic , sure .
Speaker 2So , like I said in the last question , my son struggles with ADHD . I also feel that there's something else there that we haven't found yet . He was diagnosed at three , which is the earliest the most psychologists will do testing , and there were some tests that came back kind of inconclusive , because at that stage it's so hard to determine what's toddler behavior , what's something more , and so we are going to be having him re-evaluated this year . But we do have the ADHD diagnosis and I think the thing that's so hard about that is people are so much more understanding and loving to people who have special needs . That you can see . You know , if my son was in a wheelchair or had leg braces or had a walking stick , you know I think there would be so much more grace .
Speaker 2But ADHD is blown off often as that's just a bad kid or those parents are really bad parents , and I am . This is how God has sanctified me , because I was one of the worst culprits , I as a teacher , when I had quote , unquote those kids , I just thought my gosh if their parents would stop feeding them sugar for breakfast , my gosh if they would stop feeding them video games and letting them stay up all night . We did everything right , allison . My kids did not watch a commercial on TV until they were two years old . We have never done sugar , we have never done dyes , we have adhered to bedtimes since birth and still we have this child . And people don't give grace for tantrums or big feelings or physical expression of feelings , and they can be extremely hurtful and judgmental and sometimes I mean straight up cruel . People have called my child sick , damaged , broken . We've had close family members that have said there's something really wrong with him and you are doing a bad job , you are just not handling it right . They shun him or treat him with disdain just for having special needs and , like I said , these are sort of the silent special needs that you can't see . So that's been really hard . But I've had to learn . It's been sanctifying for me because I've had to learn that that little boy and his heart are all that matters to me . And if I have to cut ties or hold people at arm's length in order to ensure he never feels like he's not enough , I will do it without a second thought and as a people pleaser . That has been something that has really changed me and that has been kind of a blessing in disguise and his needs have really drawn me closer to God , because it is impossible in my own strength . So that's our first big challenge .
Speaker 2And then , of course , the food allergies . So when he was nine years old , nine months old , he was rushed to the hospital in anaphylaxis and actually it was terrifying because we had just moved into a new neighborhood and we had given him eggs for the first time , we were just starting to wean him off breast milk and I was all alone and I made him scrambled eggs , because I mean , who doesn't give their babies scrambled eggs as a first food ? You know , he did not want to eat it . He cried and cried but , as a quote good mother , I wanted to make sure he tried to bite and he immediately puffed up and turned beet red in his entire body and I called 911 and we were on a county line and the two counties dispatches were arguing over who was gonna come get us . And meanwhile I have this nine month old who is not got very much time , and so I threw him in the car I drove very illegally and I got him to the hospital and they grabbed him and they shot him with epinephrine and they saved his life .
Speaker 2But that was my first bout with food allergies and after that , a few months later , we went to the allergy testing and they determined he had 14 food allergies and most of them were life threatening , and that is a death sentence . When you get that diagnosis that you think about . My son is never gonna get to go to the ice cream truck . My son will never get to go for pizza after his baseball game . When he gets his first kiss , my first thought is gonna be oh my gosh , did she have nuts ? What did she eat ?
Speaker 1What did ?
Speaker 2she eat , and those are the things that people don't even realize . That's a constant , it's 100% of the time . Never turns off fear . And that's been a huge challenge and for the first year it was debilitating . I mean , we had reactions all the time . As I said , no schools would take him . I had to quit my job , the daycare wouldn't take him . We couldn't . We had to stop going to church for three years because he would go to the nursery and put a toy in his mouth . Then another kid had to put in their mouth and immediately have a reaction . We get called that a church . So it was really hard .
Speaker 2But over time God really just gave me the strength to pursue this with trust and just little by little I started figuring out . How do I make foods for him , first of all , how do I feed him ? How do I keep him alive , because 14 is just really , really hard . And then how do I not only keep him alive but how do I make sure he never feels less and excluded ? We couldn't go to birthday parties or Christmas dinner or anything like that , and so I had to learn okay , what do I need to do on my part to make sure that he gets what he needs but can still participate . And so I started doing things like making cupcakes ahead of time that were safe for him and freezing them . So whenever we got a birthday invite , we popped it out of the freezer , frosted it . He had his own special birthday cake . I would call ahead to the mom and say , okay , what are you serving at this birthday party ? And then I would make him a meal that was identical to the foods that are served , but safe , so that he could participate . And so all of those things have truly made me adapt and grow and have strengthened me on every level . So it's been amazing . I mean that sounds weird to say , but it's been a huge blessing in disguise .
Speaker 2And then now I'm moving to empowering him and educating him . He's five years old and before anyone feeds him anything , he'll say I can't eat , that I have food allergies . Or he'll say have you talked to my mom ? Is that safe ? And he pretends to read labels . He's just now reading , he's just starting to read , but he will look at food and like stare at the label and be like , cause he knows what's safe in the house . And he's like mom , this is safe for me . And I'll be like yes , it is Good job checking the label . So now we're moving to empowerment and advocating , and it's encouraged me to start this business .
Speaker 2So I just started this new business . It's called Serenity Farms . It is a top nine allergen-free bakery and natural gifts store . It's a cottage setup , so it is local to the East Texas Tyler area , cause we're not allowed to ship , but we have a website and I'll send you the link to that . But we offer cupcakes and cakes and pies and cookies and things like I never had . So I had to make everything from scratch . But if I could go to a bakery that I knew was safe and with a baker who was in this with me that I could trust , I would have given them all my money . I would have been like I will pay you whatever , but it's also mine's very affordable , but I just was so desperate for that and so I've created this because of him and I just hope that it can help bless other families .
Speaker 1So that's so the top nine allergies . What do you know ? What are those ? I ?
Speaker 2do so . It's peanuts , milk , soy , egg , shellfish , fish , wheat tree , nuts and sesame . So that is all of our products , unless otherwise denoted , are all top nine free , so they're not only gluten free , but they're also vegan , which means no eggs , no butter , and we're also really committed to wholesome foods . So we don't use seed oils , we don't use artificial sweeteners , everything's natural . So we also have some sugar free offerings for a diabetics or , like my son , we don't do any sugar with him , so we make everything with agave nectar , which does not spike your blood sugar . So instead of using something like honey or maple syrup , which are great natural sweeteners , but all those still spike your blood sugar , similar to sugar . So we're just really committed to providing things for people so that , for instance , my mom could go and pick up a pie for Thanksgiving and have it there for him , and that's one less thing that I have to take care of while I'm getting everyone ready to travel three hours to get to Thanksgiving and with all my other dishes , and so that's what we hope to provide .
Speaker 1Yeah , oh , that's such a wonderful service and I mean , like you said , unfortunately you can't ship outside of your area because it's a cottage industry , but if you live in the area , of course we'll put the link so people can get in touch with you and get their hands on some of your offerings . But also do your homework and look for those people in your area , If anybody's doing something like this . We had one bakery in my area that ended up . They didn't make it , so , unfortunately , people like we need to support these businesses because it is very niche , but more and more and more and more kids are having these kinds of allergies , and so if we can support these businesses , I think it's just awesome . So if you have somebody in your community that's doing something like this and you're not in the East Texas area so you can't get Nicole's stuff , definitely go look up those people and support those businesses for sure .
Speaker 2Or move to East Texas , or then you can Right .
Speaker 1I did want to . Texas is awesome we love it .
Speaker 2Yeah , it is . I did want to shout out if you're in the DFW area , dallas and Fort Worth have vegan , a vegan restaurant called the Spiral Diner , and they're not all top nine free , but they do provide vegan offerings , which means no eggs and no dairy , and so they were a great option for us before we knew about the other things .
Cool , cool , that's good . Thanks for mentioning that . Okay , before we move on from this section , I want to give you an opportunity to shout out the Teal Pumpkin Project , because your interview is gonna air a couple of weeks before Halloween , so tell us about that and what that's all about .
Speaker 2Yes , of course . So the Teal Pumpkin Project is something started by FAIR , which is the Food Allergy Research and Education Company , and they wanted to be inclusive . Halloween is one of the most difficult time for kids with food allergies , because 90% of the mass market candy on the market is going to include at least one of those top nine allergens and everyone wants to get the quote good stuff . So they get those mass market things and , you know , our kids just either can't even go trick or treating or have to come home and then throw out all that candy and it's devastating . There's lots of different things you can do , but we chose to promote the Teal Pumpkin Project and there's a website that Alison will post and it gives you , like lists of alternative things that you can hand out , things like tattoos or stickers or tiny trinkets or pencils or glow in the dark skulls or spider rings . Those are some really inexpensive options that you can get that you can hand out in addition to your candy . That would be inclusive to people with food allergies and it's called the Teal Pumpkin Project because often these offerings are either placed in the Teal Pumpkin or like pulled out of a Teal Pumpkin , so that that's kind of the color of the allergy , families can recognize and know that that's what it is .
Speaker 2My child carries a Teal Pumpkin when he trick or treats so I alert my neighbors . Like my son is coming around , he has a Teal Pumpkin . That's how you'll know he'll need his special stuff and there's also posters you can post on your house that are posters of a Teal Pumpkin . That will let families know that you are participating . A really good resource for this is Oriental Trading Company . They have exceptionally inexpensive mass quantities of things like spider rings and stickers and stuff you can get , I mean , for literally a couple of dollars , like a hundred pack of stuff to just throw in a bucket . So I wanted to just bring awareness to that because I don't think people it's just something you don't think about if you don't have an allergy kid and if it's one small way that you can include someone that wouldn't be included normally , it's so appreciated by the families .
Speaker 1Oh , absolutely , and that's really cool . I had heard a little bit about that and I'm guessing that maybe . I love that they have resources , like you could post something on your door or by your front door so people know . But , like in our neighborhood , on the Nextdoor app , they have like a Candy Map function every year so that you can sign up for you can put your house on the Candy Map . It works great in our neighborhood because we're kind of all spread out so we're not like house after house after house right next to each other . But anyway , I'm wondering if they have a function or some way that we could denote this is a Teal Pumpkin house , so on . Can you have people sign up for it or how does that ?
Speaker 2work , yeah . So on the FAIR website they have a global map or like a world map , and it has you can put in your location . You can add your house to it . And I'd also encourage you , if you are an allergy family , go talk to your HOA if you have one , because we moved into a brand new housing edition 500 rooftops and I just was like I'm just gonna put this out there to the HOA and see what happens . They ran with it and every single one of those houses participated from that year on .
Speaker 2So be an advocate for your kid if you have an allergy kid I've also . I don't live in an HOA neighborhood now . I sent out flyers last year . I just printed up FAIR also has flyers that you can post and I printed the information on one side and the flyer on the other , and so they could just take that one piece of paper , stick it on their door and know exactly what to do . So I encourage you families , don't just keep your kids at home if they wanna participate . Become an advocate , their resources available and get this movement going further so that we can be inclusive .
Speaker 1Yeah , oh , I absolutely agree . This is an area where inclusivity is a good thing . Yeah , I mean , we might , like we might . Some of us may be tempted to internally roll our eyes if we're like , okay , we got allergies , what really you know . But I would hope that by hearing your story today , people would recognize these are literally your son has 14 life-threatening allergies . It's not you know something where it's more of a preference that I just kind of don't want him to eat this . No , like literally , he can't eat this or he will die . Yes , yes , so maybe just having a little bit more compassion and doing whatever you can to help those kids have a great experience , whatever the holiday is , so that's really good . I'm glad we got to bring that up . Thank you for sharing that with their audience .
Speaker 1Okay , let's move on to hospitality . I would love to know what are some practical ways that you show hospitality in your home making , since you have such a rich legacy of that in your family .
Speaker 2Well , right now , food , food is my love language . I'm very , I very much enjoy bringing people food . I we , because of this stage in our life , we don't often have people over . I definitely am looking forward to the season where we can entertain more . My house is never in welcoming shape for me to do a lot of entertaining and I do invite people in , but I invite people in that I know , no know me and you know I welcome them into my mess . But I don't do as much entertaining as I wish I would at this season . But we will . We will definitely be entertaining in seasons where we're in a little bit older with our kids , but food is my jam .
Speaker 1Yes , yes , absolutely . How do you think home making helps to build communities ?
Speaker 2I think it puts people and relationships at the center . It prioritizes others over yourself , which is what Christ calls us to do . I mean , I could sleep in a few more minutes and just throw some cereal in a bowl , or I could choose to get up and make them pancakes and let them help and pour into them a little bit first thing in the morning . My husband is a fully capable adult who can make his own coffee , but you know , I like making it for him , I like bringing it to him and saying good morning to him and letting him know . That's one little way I can show him how much I love him . So I think it just prioritizes people and others .
Speaker 1Yes , absolutely , that's
great . Okay , I'm gonna ask you some questions and you can tell me as much of a story as you want or just give me a short answer . It's up to you . What is your biggest home making fail ? So , far .
Speaker 2Oh man , okay , so I know you have gluten-free in your family , so mine happens to be a gluten-free . Because of all the allergies , gluten-free , I think , is the hardest , and so before we knew my son needed to be gluten-free . I had a friend with celiac and I was like I am going to make her this beautiful strawberry gluten-free bread , and if you're not familiar with gluten-free bread , the texture and the density is very different and you also have to treat it differently in the area of refrigeration , which I didn't know . So I presented this dear friend of our family with a rancid , moldy I don't even know what gross strawberry bread wrapped beautifully a week earlier . A week earlier , allison , I just need you to do the math on that . Yeah , my beautiful strawberry bread . And she opened it and , bless our heart , she didn't even wince when she smelled it and she was like thank you , it's beautiful . So that was definitely one of them .
Speaker 2And then my second is . So my husband and I were vegan before I got pregnant for a little while , and we decided that we needed to share that with our family , and it was my mother and law's birthday , and so I made her a vegan cake with vegan frosting , and this was the grossest thing I have . My family literally like so , my husband's family . That's the story that initiated me into the family . Like that is the story that will forever be . My legacy in that family is my mother-in-law's vegan birthday cake , because it was disgusting .
Speaker 1But now I was like now are they like really , nicole , really you're gonna have a bakery and you're basically making vegan stuff again .
Speaker 2So okay , let me say that was many years ago and I've gotten really good at it .
Speaker 1Well , I mean , I would hope so , if you're gonna open a bakery , Okay so let's let tell me about a win . What's the reason he'll making wins ?
Speaker 2Oh , learning to cook for my kiddo . I can make everything , anything allergy free except macaroni and cheese .
Speaker 1There are a ton of macaroni and cheese recipes out there .
Speaker 2They're just not good , and that's my life goal is to figure out how to make allergy free . Back in cheese that tastes good .
Speaker 1That would be so hard because you can't even like make the . You can't make like the cashew cream stuff because he can't have that . What would you even use for a base ?
Speaker 2So there's there's a lot of vegan recipes that mix vegetables like potatoes and carrots and like other vegetables to kind of create that umami . But it's not good . I mean , I'm just gonna be honest , it's not . It's definitely not macaroni and cheese . So , yeah , that is . That is a sadness , because that's one of my joys in life is macaroni and cheese . But I will work on it until the day that I die and if I figure it out , you'll be the first to know . I'm going to send you the recipe . Okay , okay , good .
Speaker 1Thank you , I would love that . Okay , so how about a home making product or resource that you're loving right now ?
Speaker 2Okay , so , as you can tell , I'm long winded . I'm going to try to make this short , but I do have a little bit of a list for you , because I couldn't please not down .
Speaker 2Okay , so the first thing is ollie pop . So I used to really enjoy a white claw in the evenings , especially in the summer , which is an alcoholic beverage , and I was really convicted lately that I don't need to be drinking an alcoholic beverage every evening and so I kind of set out to find something that would mimic . I'm not a mocktail person , I'm not , and the fake wines and stuff all have weird things and don't make me feel comfortable . But ollie pop is a soda that has prebiotics and it's made with like plant fiber and it tastes really good and I mix it with a teaspoon of that calm powder you know it's that magnesium powder and I make myself a little ollie pop cocktail at night and so it calms you with minerals , with the magnesium , and it tastes just like a white claw and it's good for you . It's got prebiotics , plant fiber . So that is my nightly little ollie pop cocktail . That's my , that's my newest find .
Speaker 2And then I noticed that I was so obsessed with scrolling Instagram because of the feeling that it gave me the serenity of like . Like I said , all my Instagram is like homemakers and homesteaders set to this , like beautiful acoustic music , like sunsets over a farm , and I was like , how can I create that in my house ? And so I have recently been playing acoustic piano playlists in the background of my house . This might be like a duh and people are like , yeah , we've been doing that forever , but this is new to me .
Speaker 2And there's an artist I wanted to share because I expected . When I found him , I thought , oh my gosh , this guy is probably huge and like whatever I found him , he's brand new , and so his name is Vaughn Mayor . It's spelled V-O-N-T-M-E-R . He has the most beautiful piano music on Spotify . So everyone go and listen to his music . It is the perfect background homemaking music Like and there's never , you know . Sometimes you turn on like an acoustic piano and all of a sudden there'll be like some jazz that comes in there . It's like you're like I didn't need that , I just wanted it to be calm . So he's always very mellow , just very beautiful , and I love him . So that's my other one , and then my favorite devotional in the history of my life that I have just found . I just ordered it for the third time and I'm working through it for the third time because it's the best . It's called Walking with God in the Season of Motherhood and it's by Melissa B Krueger .
Speaker 2She's the best and this has been a game changer for my motherhood journey and even if you're not a mother , it really draws connections between your relationship with the father and really helps you switch your focus to like , hey , when this person is annoying you or when this person is constantly doing things you've asked them not to do , you're just like that to the father and so I just love that devotional . So that is like my favorite devotional all the time that I had to share . Yes , absolutely .
Speaker 1Those are fantastic . Thank you , you're welcome . Okay , how about a hack or a tip ? That you love to use around the house .
Speaker 2In true fashion . I have two . Okay , I'm going to go quick . So first of all , it's clothing bundles . So , as I mentioned , I have young kids , but they are capable my five year olds capable of dressing himself . We're working on it with my three year old . But to make things easier for them and me , I will take their shirt , put a matching pair of shorts and their underwear and socks and fold it all up together in a bundle and then I put that in their drawer and so when I tell them to go get dressed , they don't have to go to different drawers and match and do all the things , they just go and pull out their little clothing bundle for that day . So that is one little hack , and then the other one .
Speaker 2You might have to edit this if this isn't like safe , but I have started thawing my hamburger in a Ziploc bag , so I used to put it in like a bowl and fill it with water , you know , and change out the water every 30 minutes , but I was always annoyed that it was floating to the top . If you put it in a bag and you suck out all the air , the water surrounds the meat . Are you like the like everybody does ? This Is , this is a thing .
Speaker 1No , no one knows Okay .
Speaker 2I'm like , no , this is good , yeah . So I just take the pack of meat , so I use meat that is it's like freshness sealed , like what's it called Vacuum packed . I use vacuum packed meat . So I just take the entire vacuum pack , I toss it in a Ziploc gallon baggie , fill it to the top with water , take out the air , and then it thaws so much faster because it's surrounding the meat and I don't have to flip it , got it .
Speaker 1Got it .
Speaker 2Yes , so that is a good idea . I just discovered that .
Speaker 1You can also , if you have like a steak to thaw or like a roast or something . You might know this already . You can put it on a cast iron skillet and it will thaw much , much faster .
Speaker 2Interesting .
Speaker 1Like take it something about the heat transfer . Because of the cast iron it does a heat transfer . And yeah , that's what my husband told me .
Speaker 2So do you just like fill the cast iron with water ?
Speaker 1Nope , no water , no water required .
Speaker 2You just put it on the cast iron pan .
Speaker 1And it'll not like like just on the counter , not on the stove , yeah , yeah , a cold cast iron pan and you just put the meat on there .
Speaker 1If it's like a pack of hand , this is how I do my hamburger meat . If I forgot to take it out , if it's just like a pack of hamburger meat , I won't take it out of the pack , I'll just stick it . Although if you take it out of the plastic , if you can , it will thaw even faster because the meat is directly in contact with that metal . But , like right now I am thawing a chuck roast because I forgot to take it out and so I took it out of the package and it's just sitting on top of the cast iron and then when we get done talking , I'm going to go downstairs and I'm going to flip it over . Yeah , so that's . I mean , it's frozen and it's not hot in my house and I will say the disclaimer you guys do your own homework and be wise and do at your own risk , but anyway , yeah , so that's a good . I like that one , though , about putting it in the baggie , with the water inside the baggie , that's really yeah .
Speaker 2I do that with frozen chicken breasts too .
Speaker 1And I was just thinking that I bet that would work good with chicken , because the same thing happens where it rises to the top of the bowl and I usually have to like stick . I just put something heavy on top of it to hold it down .
Speaker 2I got sick of washing two dishes because I would get a bowl and put water in the bowl and put the second bowl on top of the first bowl and smash it . I know I know I was like this is ridiculous .
Speaker 1Wait , whatever works . Okay , tell me about your signature dish , if you have one .
Speaker 2I have two . I have Instant Pot Ribs and an Instant Pot Pot Roast . That are show stoppers and I will share the recipes with you because they are . My husband brags about them and I'm like , babe , it's so easy . Like my ribs take I don't know five minutes to prep and put them in the Instant Pot .
Speaker 1So how long make them amazing they ? How long ? How long do they cook in the Instant Pot ?
Speaker 2So it's so , it's a 28 minute cook time , that's what you said it for .
Speaker 1Yeah , okay , but it has to get to pressure .
Speaker 2So yeah , which is usually like an additional 20 minutes , and then it has to naturally release for 25 minutes . So you really start Like an hour . Yeah , you really start . I start like a half an hour and a half in advance just to make sure , because then there's like a little bit of broiling time afterwards and there's like some little one minute things that you do in between brushing on barbecue and stuff like that . But but that's a really good recipe and the pot roast is just . The pot roast is a little more involved . When you see the recipes are the first time you make the recipe it's going to seem intense , but after you do it once it goes way fast . So I just want to add that before you post them .
Speaker 1Yeah , okay ,
okay , those are great . That sounds awesome . I can't wait to see those . Okay , we're going to talk about the art of home a little bit . We're winding it down here how do you see homemaking as an art and where do you find beauty in the art of homemaking ?
Speaker 2I see it as an art , because you're always perfecting your technique , you're always mastering your craft , and it is such a gift and a blessing to watch the love , the knowledge , the environment that your efforts are creating , that your own hands are crafting on a daily or hourly basis , and I just think it's such a beautiful thing to dedicate your life to making other people feel loved Like again . That's what Christ does for us . He taught us , he trained us , he showed us how to love , and we're called to do and be that for other believers , especially if we have kids . So I just I can't think of anything more precious and beautiful .
Speaker 1Yes , I love that . You're always mastering your craft . That's exactly the idea behind the name of this show . It's an art and you have to practice it . Yeah , okay , tell me something about homemaking that you're thankful for .
Speaker 2Number one is the sanctification . I've talked about that , how it slows me down . It's brought me to the feet of the father and just complete release . I'm a control freak type A and God , I think , has such a sense of humor and I think he's just used every challenge that I've had to grow me in ways I didn't even know I needed to be grown . Oh yeah , sometimes painfully .
Speaker 1Yes , yes , yes , definitely All right , let's talk to the other women . I want to talk first to the older women and then we'll say something to the younger women . So how can older women help your generation thrive in your practice of the art of home ?
Speaker 2I wish they would share their knowledge more freely and boldly with us , but without judgment , and I know that's a tall order and really a delicate dance , and I think you know , as an older woman it would be harder to determine , like , what that looks like for each person that you're coming in contact with .
Speaker 2But one thing I wish I knew is how hard it is . There's so much noise right now in motherhood Bottle feed , breast feed , do baby food , do baby lead weaning , put the baby on the back , put the baby on the stomach . Everything you do is going to kill your baby , everything you do is going to ruin them forever and we're being pulled into a million ways and told that everything is a life and death choice . That is a lot of pressure , that is too much to have in our brains and I just think that that's , that's something that mothers are going through now that they've never had to deal with on that level . Before . You know you had the mothers and the grandmothers and the aunts and the friends and all those opinions flying at you , but now you have infinite amounts of information , and that's , that's a lot .
Speaker 2So that's one thing that I want to communicate . And then the other thing is that the way we're choosing to do things now is not a passive , aggressive way of accusing earlier generations of doing it incorrectly . I think that a lot of times , you know , if we do something different than our moms or grandmothers , or our mother in laws or whatever aunts did , it can come off as like Well , no , I now know you know the research behind it , and my family will be laughing at this because I'm the queen of the phrase oh no , there's research to say that dot , dot , dot . And so I think . But I think it's just like , just like their generation , everyone was doing the best they could with what they had at the time . And now , as I mentioned , we have everything at our disposal , we have every test , every data piece , and so we're just trying to do the best that we can to , and it's not a commentary on how we were raised or how you're raising your kids . So that's something else I wanted to share . Yes , amen .
Speaker 1Those are great , great points . All right , talk to the younger women listening . What advice or encouragement would you give those women who are coming behind you ?
Speaker 2Girls . There is no such thing as the right way to do things . There is no such thing as an expert in homemaking . We're all dealing with people and every person is different . Every child is different and the techniques and the blogs and the books and the podcasts are just normal everyday people sharing what worked for them in their specific circumstances . Try things and if they don't work for you , dump them . It doesn't mean you're deficient . It means you haven't found what works for your family and that everything is not as urgent as society is trying to force us to believe .
Speaker 2I did sleep training with my oldest at five months because good mothers ensure that their babies are getting proper sleep and they train their babies to sleep on a schedule .
Speaker 2And if you don't , your baby is going to be chronically tired and never learn how to self-soothe and never learn how to sleep and have mental and academic deficiencies and on and on .
Speaker 2But this will be the biggest regret in my life , honestly , because it was psychologically and emotionally scarring to us both . We hired someone who forced us to do cry it out . It was totally inappropriate for our child . We didn't know he had special needs at the time , but we forced it anyways and we'll spend the rest of our lives on doing that damage because we didn't trust ourselves . And when we were laying in the other room crying you know listening to him cry we should have just got up and said you know what , I know what's right for my baby , I know what's right for my family . And so that's what I want to say to the younger women is you are the expert . Period Doesn't mean don't ask advice of more seasoned homemakers and women , but at the end of the day , you are going to know what's right in your heart and in your guts and I encourage them to have the courage to follow that .
Speaker 1Yeah , absolutely . I think it's the difference between seeking wisdom and seeking information . Yes , we have so much information available to us today and it's coming at us from all directions , but what we can do as far as seeking the Lord in all of this is ask him to give us wisdom and to desire wisdom , and then that will help us . You know , make those choices when we're faced with situations like that , where it seems like , oh , this is what the experts say , but I don't know , this doesn't feel right with me .
Speaker 2Yeah , wisdom , wisdom is a good thing , and I think , remember that the enemy is the master of fear and so , and especially new moms , new homemakers , new home schoolers , it just swirls around us constantly . That's the enemy . That's the enemy trying to take away future warriors for God's kingdom , and you know , in building the home and building your family . So keep that in mind and fight through that fear and trust in God to lead you .
Speaker 1Those are good words to close on , nicole . This has been such a delightful conversation . I'm so glad that we got to sit down and talk today , and I've enjoyed hearing your story of home so much . Thank you for being here .
Speaker 2Thank you so much , alison , it has been a true honor .
Speaker 1Thank you so much for listening to this homemaker portrait of , in the trenches , a homemaker , nicole Pace . I hope you've been inspired and encouraged by Nicole's story of home . I know that I have . I learned so much . I was challenged by the words that she had to give to the older women and to the younger women . I particularly loved that part of our conversation , just hearing Nicole's passion and her just bold words to say hey , you know , there is a lot being thrown at homemakers right now and we need to first of all give each other grace and support one another rather than be offended by one another or comparing to one another or all of those things that we tend to do . And then we also need to check our hearts for fear . We need to make sure that we are not being motivated by fear and unfortunately a lot of that information that's out there it uses fear . They're using fear to try to motivate you to make the choice to buy the thing , or , you know , buy the program or buy the , whatever it is . They're trying to sell you . And I'm not saying that all the things out there are bad , but when you feel fear creeping into your spirit , when you're scrolling and you see that ad or you see that news story and you find that fear is what is primarily motivating you , that's a good indication that the enemy is at work and you need to bring that to Jesus and you need to leave that with him , because he has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity , but a spirit of power and of love and of a sound mind . So , like we talked about , ask for wisdom and trust the Lord and do not let fear paralyze you , because fear over every single little decision that we have to make as homemakers and we have to make a lot of them every single day and if we're finding that fear is creeping into every decision that we're making , that is going to make us ineffective in the calling that God has put before us and fear is not the way that we want to go about our daily tasks , because it's a terrible , it's a terrible master and will sabotage your homemaking every single time . So walk in faith and in confidence , not fear . Okay , well , that is it for this week's episode .
Speaker 1A couple of quick reminders sign up for the newsletter so that you can get your hands on all of the resources that Nicole shared with us today . Go to the art of home podcastcom slash , subscribe , and if you have found value in this episode , would you consider saying thank you in a couple of different ways . The first and most important thing you can do is you can share this episode with a homemaker that you know who would value this kind of content , who would be encouraged and inspired by stories like Nicole's . The second thing that you can do is leave us a rating and a review on your podcast listening app . And then , finally , if you would like to support the show financially , you can leave us a tip it's a one time gift in our virtual tip jar .
Speaker 1Buy me a coffee . Tips are given in $5 increments and you can buy us one coffee , two , three , five , 10 , as many as you would like . Just go to buy me a coffeecom slash the art of home . That's all for this episode . I will be back next week with a brand new homemaker portrait of a listener just like you . Until then , keep practicing your art of making a home .