Hello homemakers and welcome to the Art of Home podcast , where we are exploring how homemakers cultivate a place to belong . I'm your host , allison Weeks . I'm a wife , I'm a mom to four grown kids , granny to two , and I have been practicing the Art of Home for over 30 years . Welcome to all of our regular and new listeners . Thank you for trusting me with some of your valuable time today . If you've heard my intro before , you might have noticed a tiny little detail that was different . I said granny to two . Yep , we are expecting another grandchild in the summer and this past weekend we found out the gender . I'll share more about that in a minute on Allison's update .
Speaker 1Here at the Art of Home , we follow the Titus II model of women learning from and encouraging one another to be keepers of the home , that is , to take seriously the privilege and responsibility of running her household and loving and serving her family and community for the glory of God . We offer weekly podcasts , newsletters and other free resources to equip women in this high and holy calling of homemaking . Make sure you are taking advantage of all the Art of Home resources by following the podcast on your favorite player app , such as Apple or Spotify , and by subscribing to our mailing list . That will keep you in the know about everything that is going on with the Art of Home , primarily through our free weekly newsletter , homemaker Happy Mail . It goes out every Friday morning during regular seasons and it contains detailed show notes , takeaways and resources for that week's episode , as well as other helpful resources and homemaking articles . Sign up for our mailing list at theartofhomepodcastcom slash subscribe . Now it's time for Allison's update , the part of the podcast where I tell you what's been happening in my home and what homemaking resources I am loving lately . This week's update is brought to you by listeners who support the Art of Home through Buy Me a Coffee . Buy Me a Coffee is a virtual tip jar where you can show your appreciation and support for the show by giving a one-time tip or by becoming a Titus II woman supporter . By setting up a recurring tip of $5 per month , titus II women supporters receive access to a weekly audio version of Homemaker Happy Mail . Whichever way you choose to give , I am grateful for your support .
Speaker 1As I mentioned earlier , we had a gender reveal party for Grandbaby number two this weekend , and it's a girl . I was not at all surprised , I just knew it was a girl . But the guesses for Team Boy were definitely in the majority , including my son and daughter-in-law . They were shocked . It was a delightful time with our family and some friends . My son wants to consistently hit a powder-filled baseball for each gender reveal . That's the orderly engineer in him coming out . So we had a baseball themed party , complete with a hot dog bar with fun toppings and cute boxes of popcorn for guests to snack on when they arrived .
Speaker 1It was at the end of a very busy week , and one thing that I've learned over the years of hosting is to do as much as you can ahead of time . Carving out small pockets of time to do one or two preps a few days or even a week or more before the event will save you from an exhausting marathon the day before or the day of . Those advanced preparations are not just limited to food prep . Some of the things that I did ahead of time last week were to assemble the popcorn boxes , set up the drink station minus the drinks , print out the Team Pink or Blue guessing chart , gather up all the paper goods and the utensils that we would need . The bigger the event , the earlier you should start doing some small preparations and you will be less stressed and more at ease to welcome your guests and enjoy the event yourself . So we have an event today .
Speaker 1It's Valentine's Day . Do you have any special plans ? Are you wishing and hoping that your husband has made special plans ? I think Valentine's Day is one of those tricky holidays that can cause sorrow , anger , bitterness because our expectations are not met . I am just speaking from personal experience here . If you found this to be true for yourself , may I give you some advice ? Number one check your expectations . You may not even realize that you have certain expectations around Valentine's Day . Ask yourself and the Lord if you do and whether or not they are realistic and honorable . Number two communicate expectations with your husband . If you really desire to mark this holiday in a special way , you need to tell him that he cannot read your mind . Ask him how he would like to celebrate , brainstorm ideas together and then , number three , coordinate with him or for him . What I mean by that is come up with a plan , and if he doesn't have the brain space or the time to come up with anything , then you take the initiative and plan something . On the Art of Home blog today , I have a list of ideas that you still have time to implement . These are easy to do , mostly free ways that you can celebrate love in your home . Most are applicable to showing love to any family member and a few are specific to husband and wife . Click the Valentine link in the episode description box or go to theartofhomepodcastcom .
Speaker 1Now on to today's show . I'm chatting with seasoned homemaker , lydia Good , about her 47 plus years experience of keeping a home and raising five children . Lydia acquired her homemaking skills from the example of older women and from homec classes in high school and even through college . She is passionate about the Titus II model and she shares how Titus II women ministered to her in the early years of homemaking . Lydia shares about the challenge of their recent move from their home of 32 years in Florida to a new home in Tennessee to be near their son and his family . Through it all , she sees how God has been faithful in every season of her homemaking .
Speaker 1I'll be back at the end of this conversation with a few of my top takeaways and a few reminders for you . Whatever you are applying your hand to as you listen today , I know you will enjoy Lydia's story of home . All right , welcome to the art of home . I am here with my guest , lydia Good , and she is a seasoned homemaker and we're going to hear all about her extensive experience in homemaking , but first I would like her to just say hello to you all . And , lydia , why don't you just tell the audience a little bit about who you are today ? Okay , hello .
Speaker 2Well , I'm a wife and a mother and a grandmother of 14 grandchildren that I dearly love and enjoy . My husband and I have been married about 48 years well , in June this year and we have five adult children and their spouses , who are just wonderful as well . And I'm just been blessed to be a stay-at-home mom . The majority of my homemaking life and until my kids were pretty well grown and the last one was going to high school somewhere along in there , my second daughter was going to college and I had told her . I said , if you'll come back , she was away at school . I said we'll go to college together because she wasn't sure what she wanted to do . So she and I went back and we finished up college together . I think I graduated one quarter before her , so we didn't get to walk together , but we both graduated .
Speaker 2And when I started off I went to a college and it was back when they had a homemaker as a major and that's what I was going to do , and instead I got married after a year of college . And so I always said I spent 25 years in an internship before I went back and of course , the funny thing was after I finished college , the first job that I had . A principal of my daughter's school where she was going to high school it was a small Christian school ran out and said , hey , do you want a job ? And I said in what ? And he said in homec and I said okay . So it took me 25 years to get back to that , but that's kind of been my story and from there I just went on and did a lot of part time teaching and short term . I ended up getting certified in K through six and family and consumer economics , and so I taught that and currently I still have a hybrid home school class at our Christian school here and I teach family life skills right now .
Speaker 1Oh , my goodness . Okay , this is going to be a great conversation . I mean , besides the 40 , almost 48 years experience keeping your own home , that you were a home teacher that's awesome , so I can't wait to hear about that some more . Let's go back even further . Let's go back
to the beginning . Tell me when you feel like you really first became a homemaker .
Speaker 2Well , we were married in 1979 . And I don't know that I even put a label on it as being a homemaker . Back then I was young and inexperienced and at that time it was just like got married and you had a home and you did all the things that you were supposed to do , like cook and clean and I don't know . You know , it just seemed like it came naturally because that's what I'd watch my mom do and what I'd watch other women do , and so I did have a job as well . No-transcript . We started then . We had a small apartment .
Speaker 2I can tell you some stories . This is how probably inexperienced I was and that was like Our little stove in our apartment had a . It was a gas stove , so you had to light it , roll up a piece of napkin , put the , you know , light the napkin and then stick it down in there for that pilot to go . So ever since then I've never wanted to have a gas stove .
Speaker 2But we managed through that , of course , and we did some other really dumb things , like it's like oh , let's get a washer for our house and our apartment up here , and so on the second story of our apartment we brought in a washer and we hooked it up to the sink and that really didn't go real well because it dumped more water into the sink than the sink at all and we thought we'd started Garden and some property behind the apartment and we were given permission to do that and and the only way we knew to water it Was to run a hose outside our second story window to try to water it . So that did not go real well . I'm sure the neighbors all got a good laugh of that . So I kind of feel like my Homemaking has been a lot of trial and error with a lot of silly , inexperienced mistakes , but you know it was a lot of fun along the way .
Speaker 1Oh gosh . Okay , so it sounds like you didn't necessarily have a lot of skills when you became a homemaker , since you said it was a lot of trial and error , what . What was the steepest learning curve ? What skill was really challenging for you and what are some things you did to kind of overcome that , if you can remember ?
Speaker 2Well , it's funny , as I was reading through the questions and thinking about what was the hardest again , I just thought , you know , it just seemed like it was just the natural thing to do . And I have to say , looking back then and Thinking about the question , I did have skills that I didn't even realize . In eighth grade I had a wonderful home at teacher . She was my next door neighbor and she taught us to cook and make cinnamon rolls and how to knit caps and Do things like that in the eighth grade . And then in high school I had another wonderful home act teacher who taught me how to so and to get better at what I was doing . And again , doing things silly and learning things , sometimes the hard way .
Speaker 2My first , one of my first things that I decided to make in her class and I'm not really sure why at this time , but I made my husband a wool sports jacket . However , we lived in Florida . I'm not sure he wasn't my husband at the time . He was , I was dating and I just thought it would be something really cool to do . But I got a lot of experience about how to do a lot of tailoring and she was very patient with me through that process . And so there there was a wool sports jacket .
Speaker 2I think it has long been given to the you know good will but To learn how to line things and do those kind of things , and so the other skills that I learned were my mom always Let us cook at home and you know we cleaned . I don't , I just enjoyed Organization and doing those kind of things and decorating , and so it wasn't like I was a professional , but it was just I kind of enjoyed that and so I would take , I remember taking classes in high school for International cooking and things like that , and then when I went to college for that year I took , you know , other classes in child care and furniture and design and some . So I had some skills and I had great mentors with my mom and my , my to-be mother-in-law and other women that I just saw them bring wonderful potluck dishes to church and , you know , go to their homes and see how they would decorate and things like that , and so it just seemed like a natural thing that you did .
Speaker 1That's so interesting that it's coming from you . You're a different generation than our audience , most of our audience , and this is why this tightest two stuff is so important . Like your perspective at that time was this is just what you do . This is like it felt much more natural , whereas a lot of what I hear from the younger women is it feels it doesn't feel as natural to them . It just doesn't come as naturally they just because they didn't have those examples , for whatever reason lots of different reasons Because they didn't grow up seeing it modeled . They just don't . It seems so foreign to them to do these kinds of things and it's a much deeper learning curve for a lot of different things . Well , that is so . That's so cool to hear about your experience in school . And then so do they even do home ec degrees anymore ? Is that like a thing ?
Speaker 2You know , it kind of got more specialized , whether it was like textiles and Culinary arts and things like that were back when I took it , it was like just a general life skills and we'd kind of hit different things and I Actually was only privileged to teach a home ec one year to a high school class and then again . And then it's come back around again , like I said , where they needed a class in our Christian school this year for the hybrid homeschool and they asked me to do that , and so we've had fun cooking and doing budgeting and we're gonna do some sewing and learn how to Sew on buttons and snaps and make things and just , you know some basic sewing skills for them .
Speaker 1Awesome , I love that . Okay , well , let's talk a little bit about expectations and challenges . How well did the day-to-day reality of being a homemaker and keeping a home match what your expectations , what you thought it was gonna look like ?
Speaker 2Well , I think again back in that time frame , I didn't have a lot of expectations . You know there wasn't a lot of like Google and Things on TV that you were trying to compare with . If I did a lot of , I remember , you know , even Growing up , where I tear pictures out of magazines , you know , and go , oh , I like that room or I like that house or those kind of things . So all of my things were like in a folder of something Instead of on , you know , pinterest or somewhere like that . That's made it so much easier now , and so there wasn't for me . Now I don't know if it was like that for everybody . For me there wasn't that much comparing .
Speaker 2I guess are feeling like I had to live up to a certain thing . And you know , when we got married we didn't have a lot of money and we we made shelves out of Boards and concrete blocks to put our little tiny TV on , and my husband made the coffee table out of rough-sound cedar and Somewhere that table is probably still an existence . I mean , it was the sturdiest thing and had the biggest bolts . It wasn't pretty but it was strong and sturdy and he made it , you know , an end table like that and you know , we just did a lot of things like having hand-me-downs when we started from our parents and Things like that . So I , when you ask about expectation is hard for me to think back and I just , you know , again , it just seemed like that was the natural thing that you did and you , it was exciting to have a home and this was our home and and so it was . It was now my turn to decorate and do the things that I wanted to do in the way we could do it .
Speaker 1Well , what are some practical things that you did over the years
, especially as your family grew , to manage the household ? Because sometimes , when I sometimes the answer I get to that last question about expectations is I wasn't expecting , like , how challenging it was going to be to manage all the things and to make sure that you know I can cook dinner , but is it all going to come out at the same time ? And when do I do the laundry and when do I ? So it's always helpful , I think , for listeners to hear , whatever stage the woman is in , about different systems that you've implemented over the years and what , what worked well and what really didn't work well at all , just to manage things .
Speaker 2Okay , well , that's very true and that did asking it that way , in the sense that I like things very organized and I'm an organizer and so when things are not like somewhat organized , I my mind fields cluttered and so I I had that was a big challenge with five children , their ten years between the oldest and youngest , so there was always Nursing or pregnancy or some . I felt like you know , it's been a decade with that and while you're nursing and pregnant and having small children and sometimes homeschooling with that later on , it's just , you know how do I do this and I don't remember if somebody had told me or if I came across it or what , but I think the name of the book was something like sidetracked home executives was way back in the day , and the way that they had you do set your organization up is You'd take three by five cards and you'd write down every task that you would do and they gave you a list in the book of ideas and things that should be done Daily , weekly , monthly . You know things I hadn't even thought about monthly , like , oh , you actually Dust the baseboards every month . You know I'm like , oh , okay , I'll add that one and and then it would had you time each thing that you did , and so it was such an eye-opener to me because , you know , a lot of times I think your mind just gets so cluttered and overwhelmed of thinking I don't have time for this . It's just , when am I gonna fit this in ? Oh , the dishes are dirty in the sink again and I would just kick it to that , you know . But when you do the task and it was like , oh , that took like six minutes from start to finish yeah , I can do that , you know , that's not that long , it's not overwhelming . So it kind of helped me break it down bite by bite and to go oh , these things really aren't that Monumental as they are in my mind , you know .
Speaker 2And and of course it is hard with small children and you , you know Things come up and you know somebody gets sick , or you know somebody has a diaper that needs to be changed , or you know just all the things that happen with small children . But at the same time it kind of gave me that clarity of mind that went okay , I've got six minutes , I can back in the living room , you know , and straighten it up . And it also talked about things like , you know , putting things in a basket at the end of the day , so everything's not just all over the floor and trying to get that put up by the end of the day . So I think that was one of the biggest things that helped me .
Speaker 2I think I still have maybe have my file box around from all those years ago . But it kind of becomes a habit after a while To where you don't need . Oh , I put my card from Monday now I'm gonna put it back at the end of the week . You know those kind of things . So it kind of just becomes one of those things you should start doing and realizing I've got a few minutes , I can get this done .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , I love , I love those kind of tools that are helpful to . It's like how do you eat an elephant right , one bite at a time , because it can feel like an elephant . It just like weighing you down , because there's I think it's just the stacking of all the tasks , combined with the interruptions that come with having lots of children underfoot . It just it can be overwhelming .
Speaker 1Yeah , so I , you are speaking my language , I know exactly what you're talking about and I did something similar to that with writing everything down and how long does this actually take ? And that is a really good eye-opening exercise to do , because we we've built it up so much in our brain . Just the procrastinating and putting it off , because it feels like I'm never gonna have time to do this and we could have just done the thing like it , you know , yeah , so that's a really great tip . Thanks for sharing that . Well , what about challenges ? Any ? Any special challenges that you've had to face as a homemaker that you know really stand out in your memory , and what did God teach you through that ?
Speaker 2Well , I think that challenges yet sure are like trying to facilitate schedules for that many people and when some are driving or they're not driving yet and you've got four soccer games in one day , and a lot of those were challenges . And so with a larger family , you learn to try to pick and choose . You can't do it all and you can't be everywhere . It seemed like when all four of them were playing soccer and the littleest one wasn't , but there were four playing soccer I'd run from field to field but I'd missed every time . Somebody had made a play . Did you see it ? No , and I'd run to the next one . Did you see it ? No ?
Speaker 2And so it was like do you love soccer ? Is this really what we need to be doing all day on a Saturday ? Or do you really love basketball ? Or let's pick things that you really like that we can focus on . And so we've had horses , we've been in sports , we love outdoors , and so probably a big challenge which is just trying to figure out how to manage and I think that's what's so neat about being a homemaker is that when you sit down and think about it , you really are an executive in your home . You are doing an amazing job moms out there , if you're managing all of these things that you have to do and I think , just like anything else , it takes practice and prayer and just realizing what is the best thing for our family and then not feeling like you have to keep up or do what everybody else is doing , or just join everything because it might be great for somebody else but not for your family .
Speaker 1Right , oh , that's so good . We talk a lot about flexibility on the show and because it might be good for you in a particular season , and then your season changes and something happens and you add another baby or somebody graduates , or some life change happens and then you have to reassess . So we're always talking about set your values and figure out what your values and priorities are for the season of life that you're in and then make your schedule and your rhythms reflect that . But it's gonna be changing all the time because a family is like an organism it's always changing and things are always happening and circumstances are changing .
Speaker 1So I love that you talked about sports and particularly with large family living and you're trying to figure out how can we make this work , because we don't wanna just say , well , nobody's doing anything , right , right , but you have to really be intentional the more people you add to the family to say , okay , I can only be at so many places at one time and I need to be able to say to each child what is really important to you , like , what do you love ? Let's pick the thing that you really love and let's focus on that . But that's a hard conversation sometimes for people to have because they feel like they're letting their child down or they don't wanna . You know they don't wanna , I don't know . They just don't wanna make the wrong decision , I suppose . So how did your kids , how did that work for you when you had those conversations with them , like were they pretty receptive to ? Did they have to , like , drop out of something or decide to drop out of one thing in order to do something else ? I'm just curious .
Speaker 2Not necessarily , you know , did they have to drop out ? I mean , of course , if we'd started something , that was always like for us it was like we need to finish what we start . You know , even if you don't like it once you get into it , you need to go ahead and finish . You know we're in this now , and so I think we just tried to find and help them , you know , kind of find what they wanted to do , and in the process of that we were homeschooling on and off to talk about flexibility because , you know , one year I might have a baby , you know , and so somebody might go back to school and then , you know , a couple of years later these might be home but somebody else might go , you know .
Speaker 2So we were trying to always figure that and at the time it was hard because you know you feel like everybody's kind of thinking what's wrong with you , why don't you ? Just , you know , and it's like , well , we're trying to figure out the best for every child and finances . Of course , even back in that day it was expensive private school or if you were doing that . And so my kids have all been , you know , we've had different experiences of public , private and homeschooling , and it was just trying to be flexible and hear the Lord every year as to what that child needed .
Speaker 1Yeah , that's a good role of thumb . Okay , let's talk about relationships and hospitality
for a little bit . How did you invite your kids into participating in the homemaking with you ?
Speaker 2Well , everybody had chores , you know . I don't know if that's you know what you're thinking or the question is right there , but everybody had chores that they did . We use as grownups . Sometimes we kind of laugh , you know , and they'd go oh yeah , we know what family time is . That means we're all working on something together on Saturday , you know , and we usually would have , you know it's . You know , ever so often there'd be a project where it would be outside . You know , we'd all work outside together to clear something . Or you know , hey , everybody , come in here , we're gonna paint the back porch today . You know , many hands make light work , so let's conquer that out and then we'll move on , go do other things . But you know , and they helped me inside the house with dishes , with cooking , with , you know , cleaning and different things . So they were just pretty involved .
Speaker 2And as far as hospitality goes , we always had people at our house . Friends were always welcome . We had lots of people at our table and lots of kids in a above ground pool in the backyard . That would , you know , make that circle around and do that whirlpool and that small above ground pool and just enjoyed having people over . We really , we really did not just kids but adults and groups from church , and so God blessed us with a home that was very open and a lot of space , and so it was just , you know , wonderful to be able to have people over and share meals and just share life with , and I think some of my favorite memories are just standing around my island in the kitchen and talking , you know , to people that would be in .
Speaker 1Was it a lot of your kids' friends coming or other families , or just like both A lot ?
Speaker 2of both . Yeah , yeah , we tried to do . Having five kids , you're gonna have a lot of friends in and then try to do things like from church , whether it's ladies groups or just Sunday school groups or you know , different parties and things like that . Yeah .
Speaker 1Love that . How do you feel like homemaking helps to build up community ?
Speaker 2Well , I really think the family is a foundation of our society and , just as far as homemaking , what an important God-given role we have , you know , to be able to take care of our home and , just , you know , show the love of Christ , you know , as we minister out of our home and raise our children . It's just such an important kind of had a lot of loss of words for right now , but it's just so , it's just very important . Home and hospitality and how we we utilize that and show the love of Christ to others through that .
Speaker 1It's a tool . I like that you use the word utilize , because I think we often don't think about our homes and the care of our homes and then the extension of that outward to other people as a tool that is in our tool belt to use for doing kingdom work , like spreading the gospel and telling people about Jesus , even if we just show the love and not necessarily , you know , giving gospel presentations , but just being the hands and feet of Jesus . We have our homes at our disposal to use as a tool for that and that's a really powerful tool because so many people don't have that and they they just long to be in a home and in an environment where they feel welcome and they feel like they belong .
Speaker 2I was very blessed as a young mom in our church and I feel like being involved in a church and family life , groups , whatever it may be , is so important . But we had older women and I remember our pastor one time saying to us one Sunday you know , everybody needs a mentor . And so I just went and asked one of the older ladies at that time . I said , will you mentor me ? And she was like yeah , and so we would meet every week . For we did that for I don't know how long long time and she would just encourage me . She would invite me into her life .
Speaker 2I felt like I knew her kids , even though they were grown and not living there . She would just encourage me and being a mom and a mother and how to parent , she was just amazing and she would spend that time with me . You know that she would give that time to me come pick me up . A lot of times and many times she would just minister to me about just how much God loved me and how important you know what I was doing was . And there were other women in the church that did the same thing . They would have classes and , and you know , invite the women to come and they would talk on practical things . You know just how to love your husband , how to raise your kids , how to discipline , how to pray , you know , and so we were very blessed during that time to be in that situation where these women , and godly women , just poured their lives into so many of us , and and I have more to tell you about that later with the tightest two moms . But you know .
Speaker 1I'm so excited that we're we're focusing in on this because the listeners know this is like my , this is my mantra , this is what I say all the time . This podcast is kind of like a doorway into what I want them to go do exactly what you just said . And I want to find women in person and say , hey , would you mentor me , would you let me glean wisdom from you and sit at your feet ? And , and I want to learn , I want to watch and see how you've handled , I want to hear your stories . That's what . That's what we're trying to model here on this show , to give them a taste for that , to go find it in their own communities . So , yes , that is what I want to talk about .
Speaker 1Okay , so I know we'll get to that in a minute , but I want to talk a little bit about home making seasons
and I'd love to know what was the most difficult transition for you , because we've already said , homemaking and home life is always changing , so we have to be flexible and the seasons of home making change as far as what our responsibilities are and all of that . So what was a real hard transition for you and how did you grow through it ? What did the Lord teach you and how did you handle it ?
Speaker 2I think the hardest transition for me was empty nest . I know when you are a mom and that's what you've done for years and years and your children have been around , they've been underfoot , you've enjoyed them and you've loved them . You've lived life with them and I by no means want to make my life sound like it was perfect . We had our share of problems , we had our share of difficulties and many , many areas , but just watching God's faithfulness through it all and just the relationships that we have , and then when they all moved away , it was just hard because they all moved out of state and far away from us , and so it took me a long time . I really struggled with , like Lord , why are they so far away and why can't we be near them ? And what did I do wrong that they all moved away ? Well , they got married and they married people from other states and started their own families . But in that process , I think what the Lord did to me is that he just taught me that he is always my first love , that he will take care of my children , he will take care of my grandchildren , he will take care of me , he will take care of my husband and he will provide for me what I need , and in the place that he puts me , I just need to bloom where I'm planted . We've heard that saying , and so it was just then realizing that , and that wasn't overnight . That took me quite a while .
Speaker 2Then I was able to start reaching out and start joining up with groups , start figuring out well , what do you want me to do now , lord ?
Speaker 2And working part-time , teaching part-time , started doing other things . Where do you want me to be , lord ? What do you want me to do ?
Speaker 2And in that , god has blessed us so much in the fact that , I mean , we probably see our children three or four times a year and they still live far away from us , although now we're in Tennessee and we're near my son and his family , so we see them pretty often . They're down the street from us but still get to see my daughters , and God has just blessed us with being able to travel and be part of their lives . And even though they were far away , I think some of the sweetest memories are when we were living in Florida and the kids were younger and we would do grandparents camp and they would come and stay two or three weeks and we'd go to the beach and play with them and go to places where they would climb walls and jump and of course I was still a little younger and could do all of that with them but just having times of making crafts and playing games , and those are very precious memories for me .
Speaker 1Oh , that's wonderful . Yeah , I think there's sweetness in that . In the change of our seasons we say goodbye . It's always bittersweet because we say goodbye to one season and all that came with that , but that opens us up to say hello and welcome in different blessings that come with the next season , and I love that I'm just entering that season right now . So had an empty nest for a couple of years and now we're welcoming our second grandbaby soon . Yes , I heard that so excited .
Speaker 1Yes , yes , we are distantly related , lydia and I so her sister is Alma Wakefield , who was a guest way back in our very first season of the Art of Home , and Alma is grandmother to my daughter-in-law , so that's how we're connected . Okay , what about right now , in the season that you're in , what does homemaking look like for you ? How are you growing , still challenging yourself to grow in this area ?
Speaker 2Well , it's been very different and this has been somewhat of a difficult season that I've been having to learn to grow through as well .
Speaker 2We sold our home that we had been in in Florida for over 32 years and of course , that home had all the memories of all my five children growing up there , had the marks on the ceiling where they threw the ball or you know all of those things .
Speaker 2So we moved from that home and we kind of it was kind of one of those things where we knew we were , we felt like God was calling us to do it , but at the same time I really felt like I heard God say I'm sending you to a place you don't know . And so we spent about 16 months trying to travel around , trying to figure out where we're going to land , what we were going to do , and we ended up with the COVID season , of course , and so that kind of put a damper on being able to buy a home . For a while . Everything we would look at would already be bought or had so many bids on it . So we kind of bought a house site unseen , and it was up the street from our son , and it worked out and we were , oh , we finally got a house after you know , moving around that much and renting a place out on a farm which we loved , you know , and just doing different things , it was kind of time to .
Speaker 2My husband was ready to settle down particularly , and so it's just been harder in the sense that , you know , everybody talks about what's the word scaling back or you know , downsizing that's the word , and I found for me because I loved being hospitable and having people in my home that it's been really hard for me to downsize and I have really been having to work through pride and going back to okay , now , if I could do that when I was young in an apartment , what's keeping me from doing it now , if I ? I know I had a big kitchen and I had a big island and you know all the room for everybody to be in my home , okay , but what's keeping me from doing it now , you know , and so that has been kind of a difficult season to transition into , because that's part of what I love doing , and so downsizing means less space , and so you've got to find places to put things . And how do I get organized in this space ? And if I turn my computer around right now , you'd be like , oh , you haven't figured that out yet and I haven't . I'm still working on it because I still love my things , like having my sewing machine out and having places for all of those things , so I can make those crafts or those little outfits for my granddaughter at Christmas , you know . And so that has been a harder transition than what I thought it would be .
Speaker 2For me it's this downsizing stage , but again it's saying goodbye to one thing , like you said , and saying hello to another , and in that God has opened up here just amazing relationships . And again it was choosing to bloom where you're planted and so getting involved , getting involved in women's groups at church , getting involved in exercise with ladies , being involved , you know , with maybe some kind of ministry we go down and help with , or just being involved and being present where we're at and letting God use us to love other people rather than waiting for them to come to us . Because when you're new and you don't have children , that kind of are that buffer , that kind of move you into that new space . It's a little more difficult you find out when you're older to move somewhere new . And how do I ? You know ?
Speaker 1transition into this .
Speaker 2Nobody knows who I am .
Speaker 1They don't even know I have children , yeah , but talking about moving from where you've been planted for such a long time and being willing to say goodbye to what you're used to , and I'm thinking too about the downsizing thing I'm like , oh , but Lord , because I love to do hospitality and I love it when I can have all my chickies , you know , under my roof and there's a bed for everybody and there's enough plates for everybody and all of that kind of thing . So to think , if the Lord asks us to let go of that for something else , can I say yes to him ? I think it's going to be really hard , because even just thinking about letting go of some of the some of the things just for other reasons , I'm like , oh , I don't want to let go of that . So I love that point that you made that we need to be willing to hold our thing , hold things loosely , because you asked that question . Well , I could do it when I had a little bitty apartment , so why can't I do it ? You know , like , what's the difference ? That's a really good question to ask .
Speaker 1And then the other thing you said about being willing to get out and get involved even if you don't have kids , because they do kind of naturally draw you out because you got it .
Speaker 1If they're in school , you know you get to know people in their school or the Sunday school class or whatever . Our kids tend to help us transition in the new places , just by default . But if you're doing that on your own it is harder , for sure , and I think even for the , even for the homemaker who's in a place that she's familiar with and has children at home , it's still because we're at home all the time . It's very tempting to just kind of Circle the wagons and just stay home and just we're just gonna be with one another and we're not gonna get out and Be a part of society . And I do understand you know home is first , your priority is first to your home and your family . But we can't just hold up and , you know , be hermits in our house . So I Do think it's important to get out there and get involved in it's amazing what God opens up to .
Speaker 2When I came here , my grandson had started in a private school here and so I was like , well , I'll just look at that , maybe I'll sub . And I walked in and Started talking to the principal . The school had just started up and she's like we have a job for you . And so I have been doing their hybrid homeschool program . This is my third year now and love every minute .
Speaker 2I work with the most godly wonderful Women that are just it's just inspiring , because they they have a vision for this school and they love the Lord and , you know , keeps me young , being around Younger moms and younger people and and are being able to be with children . And so God has used that to Help me not feel like a stranger here , because I've met parents and families through that , so you never know what God has in store for you . And in the next season and yes , you do just need to Hold things lightly because , yes , I do I have all those plates somewhere that most of them weren't given away , but you know it's a new season with something different happening , but it also doesn't mean and that's where for me , I just I keep coming back and saying , lord , just help me not to be Prideful that I won't open my home . Help me not to be fearful . Help me not to be , you know , thinking , oh , I can't do this because it's , you know , so much more downsized than it was . You know , use me .
Speaker 1Use me where I'm at you know that's good , that's a good word . Okay ,
I want to do a little quick answer , sort of rapid-fire Section , about tasks , home making tasks . Now We've already heard some some good fails from you that you shared at the beginning of the episode .
Speaker 2But there you go , share with , share with me what ?
Speaker 1what is a real standout home making fail in your mind ?
Speaker 2One of the other ones that I remember is taking a lasagna to a potluck and all the kids were over in the corner going oh what you know ? And apparently it's I had dumped sugar in it , I don't know . They were like this is the sweetest , most awful thing . So you hate to do wrong on a potluck . I did wrong on a pot and I mean I make a good lasagna . I don't know what happened , but it's that's kind of embarrassing at a potluck and everybody's like who made this ?
Speaker 1You could have just like , left your dish and just not claimed I Was terrible , wasn't it my ?
Speaker 2kids probably would have said my mom .
Speaker 1Okay , how about a memorable home making achievement ?
Speaker 2oh , you know , I was thinking about this woman as I was looking through the questions and I think for me personally Because I love to decorate and and I love home stuff , always have One several years ago I got into real estate and I sold houses for about five years and love doing that .
Speaker 2While I was doing that in Florida and With that wanted to do home staging , so got certified in home staging and so I mean I just enjoyed the whole home decorating and all of that . So At one point I started painting furniture , when that was , you know , first came in and that was so fun to go around and just find old pieces that Needed some love and care and some paint and some just some fix up or some new handles , and I just loved watching them come to life and then that people would actually buy them . You know it was just like , wow , this would . So that was just kind of a fun thing for me . I , you know not that it was important or , you know , really big and it was it's probably over I don't know , three or four years . And then my husband and I got where it's like I think we're too old to deliver furniture Like you need to find a hobby that's not so heavy .
Speaker 1Oh , that's funny . Okay , how about your favorite home making tip or hack ?
Speaker 2Oh , that was a hard one . I Really couldn't come up with something like that that I could come up with the top of my head . I guess my hack would be I always garage-selled or thrift stored , you know , and I love doing it . I still do to this day . Sometimes that's my problem with downsizing , because when you downsize and you already don't have space and you're still loving that , what do I do with this stuff ? So ? But I've always done that since the kids were small and God has provided Amazing things that for our family and I felt like , you know , I could decorate my home on a Shoe string budget and I could have the best things and just turn them into something else or use them in another way . Yes , oh , I know an epic fail what I've written now . That wallpaper in the 80s , ducks and geese Border all over our new home , yeah , and then later I had to take it all , scrape it off .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , wallpaper , yeah , country , country , geese With , usually with bows on them or bonnets or yes , why did I do that ?
Speaker 2I don't know .
Speaker 1Okay , so yes , yes , thrifting . I've always been a thrifter to and thrifted , because it was just easier to keep Three boys in blue jeans if we went and thrifted them , because it was crazy expensive they anyway . So we are big fans of thrifting in my household and thrifting is having its moment now . It's like it's very popular on the internet . Everybody is finally realized . I don't know if it's because everything is so expensive , new now , everything . Everybody has gotten on the thrifting train and I'm very happy about that . So , alright , how about a Homemaking tool or product that you could not live without ?
Speaker 2well , it is a Pot strainer . It had a handle on it and it was metal and about half circle with slits in it . You put it on the side of your pot to drain the water off . I have had it since my shower in 1979 , when they gave me a kitchen shower , and I have used it probably almost daily for 48 years . So I think that's the one Wow that's good yeah so like restraining pasta or any , yeah , yeah .
Speaker 2Anything you boil , new that's instead of a dumping it into one of those strainers or colanders , it just goes . It sits right on the side of the pan and you just hold it with the handle and your pot and that's so cool .
Speaker 1I'm sure they probably make something like that . They probably do look that up . Okay , how about your signature dish ? What are you famous for ?
Speaker 2Uh , chicken pot pie and meatloaf , oh yeah .
Speaker 1I just had a chicken pot pie and the last week . The lady whose interview I was last week . Okay , tell me about your . I want to hear how you do meatloaf , because I I find that a lot of people do very different things with meatloaf .
Speaker 2Okay , well , I got this from my mother-in-law and it is Use pepper each farm stuffing and cream a mushroom soup .
Speaker 1Oh with . Okay , now I've heard the stuffing , but not the stuffing and the soup . Okay .
Speaker 2Yeah , and then you saute onions and celery and and then you cover it , put it on a . Oh , what are they called ? It's a Broiler pan that has a slits in it .
Speaker 1Oh , so you don't put it in a loaf pan , no , you like any of the oil or grease it's on , it drains off .
Speaker 2Oh , that's really cover it until the last 10 minutes and you take it off and it's covered with ketchup on the top . And you know , one time I even had one of my friends kids come over and ask me if they could get my recipe , for they were going to make it for their girlfriend for Valentine's because it was their favorite dish . That's what she wanted .
Speaker 1So it's like that's cool . Can you share that recipe with with us ? If I , maybe you ?
Speaker 2know if I could come up with it in my head , because I've done it for so many years . I don't even know if it's written down .
Speaker 1Well , if you can like ballpark , you know the amounts , and then we'll , we'll get it , we'll get it actually we'll all write it down and format it and everything , and we'll get that to the audience in the newsletter . That'd be great . Okay , let's talk about the art of home . So how do you see homemaking as an art
and where do you find beauty in homemaking ?
Speaker 2Oh , the most beautiful thing is when your adult children love you and they love the Lord , and you are standing behind them in church and they're having , you know , their arms are raised in praise and worship , and you're watching your grandkids and they are too , and so that's probably , to me , the most beautiful thing of homemaking . And then , as far as the home itself , it's just such an art because , goodness , everything you do is creative .
Speaker 2You know you're either creating management of some kind , or you're creating , decorating , and you know cooking , sewing , you know just taking care of nursing , you know , whatever it might be , it's just , it's just a there's no , there's nothing else that I know like it . You can go and you can do a job and you can be professional in that job , but in this job you have to be a mini professional in all of so many areas .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , yeah , absolutely yeah . You're always creating either an environment with the decor or an environment with , like , the music you play , or you know the books you read together , or the words you speak , or you're creating management . I like that . I like that Thinking about it as a creative endeavor .
Speaker 2Speaking of music , I was sharing this with the mom life table the other day that back in the day when our kids were growing up , we would , we had that intercom in the house , you know system , so I could turn it on every morning and we'd turn it on to the Christian radio station to wake up to . But we also had tapes probably even cassette but CD of scripture tapes . So we would play scripture tapes a lot in the car when we were going places and so you know my adult kids will laugh and you know you can say a scripture and they can , they can start singing yes , and I love that and so passing that on to my grandchildren .
Speaker 2There are many out there now , but it just , it's so peaceful and so calming just to have the word in your house .
Speaker 1Oh yeah , I absolutely agree . And now there's there's no excuse . Ladies , you have Spotify . I mean , you can just pull up anything , Don't have to have the tapes or the CDs . That's a great , that's a great tip . So what is one thing about homemaking that you are thankful for ?
Speaker 2I'm just so thankful that God has given me the privilege to do this . Wow , that could make me want to cry . I have just the most beautiful , wonderful family . Like I said , we are far from without problems , but we have been saved by the grace of God and it's just such a privilege to see adult children who love the Lord and serve him and and when my children , grandchildren , are baptized . And you know there's another generation that you see that wants to walk with the Lord and and then you know that you know all the time you put into this is is worth every bit of it . And even for parents whose children who may have gone astray or be in a rebellious state , you know , continue to pray . We all go through those seasons with , if we did ourselves , probably our children do you know ? Our grandchildren probably will . But continue to pray , continue to pray over them and speak the word over them and love them the way Jesus loves them .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , absolutely . I second that . Well , what's I want to talk about ? Titus to women .
This is something that's very dear to your heart and you can share with us about your experience with that and then also share with us what's an award of encouragement that you would give to the younger women coming behind you .
Speaker 2Okay , Well , titus to . We started a group actually called Titus to back in the 80s a friend of mine . We would get on the phone , you know , every day , back before you could text and do all those things , and I think we would just kind of check in on each other . We both had larger families and we'd be like how's your day going ? You know , you know , how'd you handle this today ? Or this is what happened today , you know . And so we spent a lot of time talking like that . And then one day my friend said , you know , if we're all , if we're going through these things and we're trying to find answers I bet there's a lot of moms out there who are and she said , I think we need to start something . And so , you know , I was like , okay , you know , let's do it . And so we felt like first , I think , we talked about a newsletter or something . I don't think that ever came to fruition , but that the main thing was , as we said , well , let's get some older women and see if they'll mentor us . And so we asked a dear lady in our church Mary Jo was her name if she would come and mentor us on a monthly basis . We got together , and so the first , tightest two was at my house . We had tables set up all over my back porch and , goodness I think there were about 40 women that came . So , yeah , everybody was looking for something , you know , to be encouraged in , I think , and that group continued on for years .
Speaker 2Mary Jo led that group for years . In fact , she was the type of woman she was such an encouragement and just such an amazing woman of God . She would invite us over . We would go over and just sit with her and she would just share the Lord with us . You felt free to just to tell her what's going on in your life , you know , and she would just always point us back to the scripture . She would do things like she would have weekly groups in for breakfast , you know , and just sit and chat with them . And we would laugh because she had one red velvet chair in her living room and we were like , oh man , you're in the red velvet chair , you're in the hot seat , she's going to ask you those questions and she's not going to let you go until you know God gets a hold of you . You know , and you were , like you know , surrendered in that area and she did it in such a loving way . We laughed about that , but she just loved us to Jesus . And there were several women .
Speaker 2Not only did she do that , she started a ministry back in the 80s with the tightest two moms and they would go and decorate homes . This was long before anything came up on TV , this was long before HGTV . And she would go into a home you could invite her to come in . She would go into a home and in 24 hours she would redecorate and your whole home . She would rearrange furniture , she would paint walls , make curtains . It was a team , it wasn't just her , but she would go in and pray over that home . The team would come in and then people like me who were younger moms , whenever we could , we'd go and volunteer and just spend all day and we would , you know , clean for this , whoever it was , we'd clean , we'd organize with .
Speaker 2Curtains were being made , wall wallpaper was being put up at the time . But there was also something else that she did . Back in that time we had a shop in our town that was a sheet shop . That was like a remnant . They weren't finished out . So they were big , huge king , queen twin and they were patterned like you couldn't , wouldn't believe back in the 80s , I mean , and so she started stapling these to the wall and so we did that and she would make back in that time it was like canopies you would put over the beds with these things . I mean we would sell miles of ruffles and just you know all that kind of stuff to go with this .
Speaker 1Yes , yes , the height of the height of Laura Ashley , stuff , yeah .
Speaker 2And she wouldn't leave until it was done . You know , and it was just an amazing transformation . She blessed I mean hundreds of families through this ministry that she started and she kind of took me under her wing as one of her daughters through the years . You know that's , you know a adoptive daughter there in the area and so I could just go to her home anytime , knock on the door and go . I'm here . You know I need you , you know I have .
Speaker 2I have a wonderful mom too , but my mom didn't live in the town there with me and so you know I would , or I just go visit with her . You know she just had a wealth of information , but she would go and stay at these homes and with these teams and we would just work all day long . And I was privileged to be able to be part of that at times when I could go , and they even traveled to other churches . It was such the ministry became so known . Our church in Titusville , florida , had a retreat center and women would . Women would come to the retreats and then they would have open houses so they could kind of train other women how to do this and how to decorate and how to help other people and it was just an amazing ministry , I mean just she .
Speaker 1Okay , so she had the Titus 2 ministry , that where she had everybody come to your . You had the one at your house first .
Speaker 2That was a monthly meeting of young moms and that was the older women teaching the younger women .
Speaker 1And y'all did , and that carried on for years . Yes , and then as an offshoot , like a secondary part of the ministry , she would do this design stuff like decorating and all that . Yes , now Alma talked about something very similar . Were you guys in the same town at this time ?
Speaker 2We were Okay , yeah , we both lived in the same town for a while .
Speaker 1This sounds familiar because when she told me about it I was like , are you kidding me ? Because you know . She said you could like sign up and these women would come to your house and they would show you what to do and how to decorate and do all these things .
Speaker 2I mean they would come and do floral arrangements . Women would just come and spend all day and , just , you know , make your home beautiful . And it wasn't one room , you know , it was like the whole house . It was just an amazing ministry God just gave her .
Speaker 1How was it funded ?
Speaker 2I thought you would ask that . You know , she said she told me many times she said I'd never took money for this . God always provided what we needed . And she said people just would donate things . And just she , her , her way of saying it was , and many times with us as young moms , it's like she said I grew up in the depression and you just learned to make do . And so she would call , say that you know , and she would go into a house and she would just , might , take something from one room that didn't seem very , you know , interesting and put it somewhere else . And it was like there it is the same thing , but it just just totally different right there . How did you do that , you know ? So she would use what the people had and then they would bring in things that had been donated and all of that . And so she did that , I think , up until the time she couldn't walk anymore .
Speaker 1Oh , my goodness , wow . This is a really , this is a really good testimony and endorsement for making those connections in real life , because we have now it's , you know , 2024 , we have YouTube University . That's fine , there's , there's room for that , but there's also you're missing out on something when you don't learn from people in real life , like face to face , because there's a component there that you just , you just can't get over the internet . So this is great .
Speaker 2Well , that's so true because none of these women that I you know took me in and mentored me . None of them just did it for the sake of doing or teaching me something . They also taught me about the Lord . They taught me how to be a wife , they taught me how to be a mom . They taught me how to , you know , step out and try new things that I've never done before . Just , they were just such an encouragement . And no , you don't get that off of YouTube . You get the basics , but you don't get real life with somebody who's walked it and can share and , you know , pass that on to you . I love that .
Speaker 1Okay , so what's a what's a word as we close here ? What's a word of encouragement or Advice , or warning or whatever that you would like to give those younger women listening ?
Speaker 2I probably say there's still older women out there who would love to be part of a younger woman's life , and Sometimes older women , as older women were just as Fearful maybe of asking or saying , hey , can I help you ? Because we kind of feel like man . Youtube does know everything and I don't think I know that much . You know what do I have to offer ? You can look it up and find that on . You know anything . You know and probably get better information than what I could give you .
Speaker 2You know , it's kind of how I think some of the older ones of us feel , but you know there's still relationships to be had . We learned from the younger women . I learned so much from like these younger women that I work with at school and Different ones in in our Bible study group . When we sit at a table or I decorate for one of the ladies meetings with them , I mean I had never done a balloon arch before . So the last two years I've learned how to do that with younger women . Yeah , they're great , and so so we learned from from the younger as well , as I think we still have some things , or we hope we have some things that we can share , that Maybe , if it's not just how to , it's more . This is what God's done in my life , and he has been fateful . He has been fateful and he will be fateful to all generations . And let me just share with you what God has done . You know , there's hope , there's hope .
Speaker 1I love that . Well , Lydia , thank you so much for sharing your story of home with us . This has been really delightful .
Speaker 2Well , thank you for having me .
Speaker 1You're welcome . Thank you so much for listening to this homemaker portrait of Lydia good . I hope it has encouraged and inspired you and that you can take a couple of nuggets of wisdom from Lydia and apply them in your own practice of the art of home . My top takeaways from this conversation are number one I really admire Lydia for having the courage to say yes to the Lord , give up what is familiar and comfortable and Step into the unknown , both of the empty nest and of moving to a different state in a different part of the country . She can do that , and so can I , with confidence because of what she does know about God . She said he taught me that he is always my first love and he will take care of my children , my grandchildren , my husband and everything else . He will provide what I need so I can bloom where I'm planted . This echoes Matthew 633 . But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness , and all these things will be added to you as well .
Speaker 1My second takeaway is how Lydia described the art of homemaking . Everything you do is creating . You are either creating management of some kind , or you're creating decor or food , or you're sewing something , or , as we've discussed before here , you're creating an atmosphere with your words and your attitude . It's all part of cultivating a place to belong and I , like Lydia , and just so thankful that God has given me the privilege of doing this creative cultivation . If you have found value in today's episode , you can say thank you by sharing the art of home with a friend , leaving us a rating and a review on your listening app and supporting the art of home ministry through buy me a coffee , either as a one-time tip or a monthly Titus to woman supporter . Thank you so much for all of your support , helpful reviews and kind messages . I appreciate all of you . That's it for this episode of the art of home . Be sure to sign up for homemaker happy mail and I will be back next week with a brand new homemaker portrait . Until then , keep practicing your art of making a home .