{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":6.21,"endTime":9.6,"body":"From the University of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":6.21,"endTime":9.6,"body":"California, Irvine, this is UCI"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":9.6,"endTime":14.46,"body":"MIND's Spotlight on Care, the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":9.6,"endTime":14.46,"body":"podcast where we share stories,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":14.64,"endTime":19.08,"body":"experiences, tips and advice on"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":14.64,"endTime":19.08,"body":"caring for loved ones affected"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":19.08,"endTime":21.0,"body":"by Alzheimer's and other"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":19.08,"endTime":21.0,"body":"dementias."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":22.35,"endTime":26.13,"body":"Hello everybody. Welcome to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":22.35,"endTime":26.13,"body":"another episode of Spotlight on"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":26.13,"endTime":30.42,"body":"Care. Virginia and I are really"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":26.13,"endTime":30.42,"body":"excited about this session"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":30.42,"endTime":33.21,"body":"because we're gonna be talking"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":30.42,"endTime":33.21,"body":"about support groups, and we've"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":33.21,"endTime":36.36,"body":"learned over the years how"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":33.21,"endTime":36.36,"body":"incredibly valuable these are,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":36.69,"endTime":38.85,"body":"although Virginia's experience"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":36.69,"endTime":38.85,"body":"that she'll talk a little bit"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":38.85,"endTime":42.69,"body":"about, it wasn't great. Mine was"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":38.85,"endTime":42.69,"body":"incredibly good. And our guest"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":42.69,"endTime":46.23,"body":"is not only a person who"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":42.69,"endTime":46.23,"body":"participated in support groups,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":46.41,"endTime":50.64,"body":"but also someone who runs a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":46.41,"endTime":50.64,"body":"support group. So, we're excited"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":50.64,"endTime":52.44,"body":"to have her here, and I'll"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":50.64,"endTime":52.44,"body":"introduce her in a second."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":52.59,"endTime":54.96,"body":"Virginia, do you have something"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":52.59,"endTime":54.96,"body":"you wanted to add about support"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":54.96,"endTime":55.35,"body":"groups?"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":55.62,"endTime":60.54,"body":"I'd love to Steve. I"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":55.62,"endTime":60.54,"body":"should have tried harder to find"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":60.54,"endTime":66.96,"body":"one. But my first experience was"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":60.54,"endTime":66.96,"body":"not terrific, so that was my"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":66.96,"endTime":71.19,"body":"problem. I decided to join one."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":66.96,"endTime":71.19,"body":"Mom was in assisted living at"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":71.19,"endTime":75.03,"body":"the time, so I could leave her"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":71.19,"endTime":75.03,"body":"and go to a meeting. And I sat"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":75.03,"endTime":78.42,"body":"there, and I was, I don't know,"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":75.03,"endTime":78.42,"body":"I was kind of nervous. They got"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":78.42,"endTime":81.96,"body":"into discussing things and, you"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":78.42,"endTime":81.96,"body":"know, introductions and all"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":81.96,"endTime":85.53,"body":"that. But then I raised my hand"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":81.96,"endTime":85.53,"body":"and I said, I have a question."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":85.92,"endTime":92.07,"body":"What are the last stages like?"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":85.92,"endTime":92.07,"body":"And it was quiet, and the leader"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":92.07,"endTime":95.58,"body":"looked at me, and she goes, \"You"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":92.07,"endTime":95.58,"body":"don't want to know.\" And when I"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":95.58,"endTime":99.81,"body":"left that meeting, I did not"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":95.58,"endTime":99.81,"body":"feel good about that group. It"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":99.81,"endTime":103.59,"body":"wasn't something that made me"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":99.81,"endTime":103.59,"body":"feel like I wanted to go back;"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":103.98,"endTime":108.54,"body":"however, looking back at my"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":103.98,"endTime":108.54,"body":"experience, I should have tried"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":108.57,"endTime":112.83,"body":"finding another group, because I"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":108.57,"endTime":112.83,"body":"really see the benefit now."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":113.07,"endTime":118.08,"body":"Steve has told me how wonderful"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":113.07,"endTime":118.08,"body":"they are. I haven't done a lot"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":118.11,"endTime":122.46,"body":"of research about them, or I"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":118.11,"endTime":122.46,"body":"haven't spoken with that many"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":122.46,"endTime":125.73,"body":"people who have been in one or"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":122.46,"endTime":125.73,"body":"participating in one, but they"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":125.76,"endTime":129.36,"body":"are really wonderful things to"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":125.76,"endTime":129.36,"body":"belong to, and I should have"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":129.36,"endTime":130.08,"body":"tried harder."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":130.949,"endTime":134.129,"body":"So I come from the other"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":130.949,"endTime":134.129,"body":"side of the fence, and I was"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":134.129,"endTime":137.429,"body":"blessed to have a couple of guys"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":134.129,"endTime":137.429,"body":"take me underneath their wing"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":137.429,"endTime":140.939,"body":"and give me some advice. And"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":137.429,"endTime":140.939,"body":"from there, we formed a men's"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":140.939,"endTime":143.639,"body":"group of guys who were"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":140.939,"endTime":143.639,"body":"supporting their wives with"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":143.639,"endTime":146.459,"body":"Alzheimer's. So it was just"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":143.639,"endTime":146.459,"body":"phenomenal. And it went on for"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":146.459,"endTime":150.179,"body":"seven years, and new people"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":146.459,"endTime":150.179,"body":"joined, and some people left,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":150.179,"endTime":153.929,"body":"and eventually we just ran out"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":150.179,"endTime":153.929,"body":"of gas, because everybody had"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":153.929,"endTime":157.589,"body":"lost their wife at that point in"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":153.929,"endTime":157.589,"body":"time. But to a man, anybody"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":157.589,"endTime":159.869,"body":"who'd gone through the groups"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":157.589,"endTime":159.869,"body":"would say it was the best"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":159.869,"endTime":162.839,"body":"experience they ever had,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":159.869,"endTime":162.839,"body":"because there's nothing like"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":162.839,"endTime":166.079,"body":"talking to somebody who's been"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":162.839,"endTime":166.079,"body":"on the same journey, not the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":166.079,"endTime":170.429,"body":"same details, but the same"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":166.079,"endTime":170.429,"body":"journey. So with that in mind,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":170.729,"endTime":174.989,"body":"I'd like to introduce Ruth Ann"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":170.729,"endTime":174.989,"body":"Rousseau, did I pronounce it"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":174.989,"endTime":175.349,"body":"correctly?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":175.35,"endTime":176.01,"body":"You did. Thank you."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":176.04,"endTime":179.64,"body":"Very good. She is a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":176.04,"endTime":179.64,"body":"dedicated caregiver, and she'll"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":179.64,"endTime":182.64,"body":"talk a little bit about how."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":179.64,"endTime":182.64,"body":"She's a support group leader and"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":182.64,"endTime":186.21,"body":"an advocate for those who are on"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":182.64,"endTime":186.21,"body":"the caregiving journey, and more"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":186.21,"endTime":190.23,"body":"importantly, she is an award"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":186.21,"endTime":190.23,"body":"winner for her efforts in"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":190.23,"endTime":194.1,"body":"caregiving. She was named the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":190.23,"endTime":194.1,"body":"Female Caregiver of the Year by"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":194.13,"endTime":197.04,"body":"Alzheimer's Orange County. What"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":194.13,"endTime":197.04,"body":"an honor. Congratulations."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":197.04,"endTime":197.43,"body":"Thank you."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":197.7,"endTime":201.87,"body":"So why don't we just jump"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":197.7,"endTime":201.87,"body":"into: tell us about your role as"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":201.87,"endTime":202.65,"body":"a caregiver."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":203.28,"endTime":205.83,"body":"I think, like most"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":203.28,"endTime":205.83,"body":"people, it just morphed. It"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":205.83,"endTime":209.52,"body":"wasn't a decision that was made,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":205.83,"endTime":209.52,"body":"just being the daughter you kind"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":209.52,"endTime":212.55,"body":"of end up in that role, or very"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":209.52,"endTime":212.55,"body":"often you do. My brother says"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":212.55,"endTime":214.38,"body":"\"It's always up to the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":212.55,"endTime":214.38,"body":"daughters, isn't it?\" Well, no,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":214.38,"endTime":217.98,"body":"but it can happen. But it was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":214.38,"endTime":217.98,"body":"more. My parents spent a lot of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":217.98,"endTime":221.43,"body":"time in other states after I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":217.98,"endTime":221.43,"body":"graduated from high school, and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":221.64,"endTime":224.25,"body":"when they finally moved back to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":221.64,"endTime":224.25,"body":"the area, they landed at some"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":224.25,"endTime":227.43,"body":"point within about 10 miles of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":224.25,"endTime":227.43,"body":"me. So we got to reconnect as"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":227.43,"endTime":231.06,"body":"adults, and it was really nice,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":227.43,"endTime":231.06,"body":"because we didn't spend a lot of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":231.06,"endTime":233.91,"body":"time talking while they were"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":231.06,"endTime":233.91,"body":"gone. And then we started"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":233.94,"endTime":236.22,"body":"Saturday night, game night,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":233.94,"endTime":236.22,"body":"every night, and then we started"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":236.22,"endTime":238.92,"body":"learning about who went to the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":236.22,"endTime":238.92,"body":"doctor. What did you find out?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":238.92,"endTime":243.09,"body":"And I ask a lot of questions."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":238.92,"endTime":243.09,"body":"Some people say I'm nosy. And it"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":243.09,"endTime":245.43,"body":"turned out I started going on"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":243.09,"endTime":245.43,"body":"doctor appointments with him,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":245.43,"endTime":249.81,"body":"and especially my dad after my"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":245.43,"endTime":249.81,"body":"mom lost her mobility. I guess"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":249.81,"endTime":253.8,"body":"you could put it that way, and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":249.81,"endTime":253.8,"body":"as he started entering the arena"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":253.8,"endTime":256.62,"body":"of Alzheimer's, then I was the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":253.8,"endTime":256.62,"body":"person that would take him and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":256.68,"endTime":259.89,"body":"learn and ask the questions and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":256.68,"endTime":259.89,"body":"do the research. So that's kind"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":259.89,"endTime":262.62,"body":"of how I ended up being because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":259.89,"endTime":262.62,"body":"I was in close proximity."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":263.07,"endTime":265.89,"body":"You actually started"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":263.07,"endTime":265.89,"body":"being a caregiver for your mom,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":265.89,"endTime":269.61,"body":"and your dad was also a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":265.89,"endTime":269.61,"body":"caregiver, and then you morphed"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":269.61,"endTime":272.34,"body":"into being the caregiver for"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":269.61,"endTime":272.34,"body":"your dad. Is that how it went?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":272.82,"endTime":275.61,"body":"Dad was the main"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":272.82,"endTime":275.61,"body":"caregiver for mom. That's kind"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":275.61,"endTime":277.74,"body":"of how that worked for all the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":275.61,"endTime":277.74,"body":"years and that was his"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":277.8,"endTime":280.59,"body":"responsibility, which he took"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":277.8,"endTime":280.59,"body":"very seriously and still does."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":280.98,"endTime":284.28,"body":"And I think when they moved"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":280.98,"endTime":284.28,"body":"closer, he was still caring for"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":284.28,"endTime":287.82,"body":"her. I was trying to care for"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":284.28,"endTime":287.82,"body":"him, to support him caring for"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":287.82,"endTime":291.03,"body":"her. And then we got the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":287.82,"endTime":291.03,"body":"diagnosis, I kind of pushed him"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":291.03,"endTime":293.88,"body":"into getting an evaluation from"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":291.03,"endTime":293.88,"body":"a neurologist. And when that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":293.88,"endTime":296.64,"body":"finally occurred, and it all"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":293.88,"endTime":296.64,"body":"kind of happened in that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":296.64,"endTime":297.3,"body":"sequence."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":297.45,"endTime":299.58,"body":"Well let's talk about"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":297.45,"endTime":299.58,"body":"that. How did you get him to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":299.58,"endTime":302.49,"body":"decide to go in and get a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":299.58,"endTime":302.49,"body":"diagnosis? How'd you work that"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":302.49,"endTime":303.09,"body":"magic?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":303.3,"endTime":304.92,"body":"Well, it took a couple"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":303.3,"endTime":304.92,"body":"years."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":304.92,"endTime":305.28,"body":"Wow."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":305.46,"endTime":307.86,"body":"I had a friend that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":305.46,"endTime":307.86,"body":"worked at a company, a large"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":307.86,"endTime":310.11,"body":"company, and they had a speaker"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":307.86,"endTime":310.11,"body":"come in, who happened to be a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":310.14,"endTime":313.29,"body":"really good, well known"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":310.14,"endTime":313.29,"body":"neurologist, and I think he"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":313.29,"endTime":316.38,"body":"worked with UCI for a while, as"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":313.29,"endTime":316.38,"body":"a matter of fact, and it took a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":316.38,"endTime":318.93,"body":"couple years to get him in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":316.38,"endTime":318.93,"body":"there. We had all noticed dad's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":318.93,"endTime":322.5,"body":"memory was declining, I mean,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":318.93,"endTime":322.5,"body":"like 15-20, years, and we didn't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":322.5,"endTime":324.69,"body":"know if it was just, if it was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":322.5,"endTime":324.69,"body":"something serious, or if it was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":324.69,"endTime":327.45,"body":"just, \"Eh, these aren't things"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":324.69,"endTime":327.45,"body":"that are important to him.\" You"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":327.45,"endTime":330.36,"body":"know, he's an aerospace"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":327.45,"endTime":330.36,"body":"engineer, and he doesn't think"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":330.36,"endTime":334.68,"body":"much about where did the pan go"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":330.36,"endTime":334.68,"body":"when I picked it up. So it was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":334.68,"endTime":337.32,"body":"hard to tell if it was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":334.68,"endTime":337.32,"body":"intentional or if it was just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":337.32,"endTime":338.34,"body":"lack of interest, or what."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":338.55,"endTime":339.63,"body":"Or normal aging."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":339.66,"endTime":342.72,"body":"That too. But now I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":339.66,"endTime":342.72,"body":"hear that normal aging, you're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":342.72,"endTime":344.52,"body":"not supposed to lose your"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":342.72,"endTime":344.52,"body":"memory, so I don't know, I'm"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":344.52,"endTime":347.01,"body":"confused about the whole thing"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":344.52,"endTime":347.01,"body":"still. Mom had a couple of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":347.01,"endTime":350.37,"body":"incidents, and once we got those"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":347.01,"endTime":350.37,"body":"under our belt, and we moved on,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":350.37,"endTime":352.86,"body":"then Dad said, \"Okay, I'm ready"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":350.37,"endTime":352.86,"body":"to go.\" So it took a couple"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":352.86,"endTime":356.37,"body":"years, and then we finally went"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":352.86,"endTime":356.37,"body":"in and talked to the neurologist"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":356.37,"endTime":358.8,"body":"and did the testing where we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":356.37,"endTime":358.8,"body":"indeed found out they did the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":358.8,"endTime":361.83,"body":"spinal fluid test where he said"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":358.8,"endTime":361.83,"body":"there's definitely he's headed"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":361.83,"endTime":364.98,"body":"in that direction. So that's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":361.83,"endTime":364.98,"body":"when I went, \"Okay, let me learn"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":364.98,"endTime":366.93,"body":"about this because I don't know"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":364.98,"endTime":366.93,"body":"anything about it really, other"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":366.93,"endTime":369.12,"body":"than you lose your memory. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":366.93,"endTime":369.12,"body":"don't know what the end looks"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":369.12,"endTime":370.56,"body":"like. I don't know what the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":369.12,"endTime":370.56,"body":"middle looks like.\""},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":370.83,"endTime":373.29,"body":"So where did you start?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":370.83,"endTime":373.29,"body":"Where did you start on your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":373.29,"endTime":373.98,"body":"investigation?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":373.98,"endTime":375.93,"body":"On the internet. That"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":373.98,"endTime":375.93,"body":"was nice that we have that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":375.93,"endTime":378.63,"body":"resource now, whereas maybe"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":375.93,"endTime":378.63,"body":"40-50 years ago, I don't know"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":378.63,"endTime":381.42,"body":"what people did. I just started"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":378.63,"endTime":381.42,"body":"searching, and I can't remember"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":381.45,"endTime":384.93,"body":"the whole process, but I did end"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":381.45,"endTime":384.93,"body":"up trying to find a support"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":384.93,"endTime":387.87,"body":"group, and walking all around"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":384.93,"endTime":387.87,"body":"the Saddleback campus one night"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":387.87,"endTime":392.25,"body":"trying to find the room. Never"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":387.87,"endTime":392.25,"body":"found it. I think I attended two"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":392.25,"endTime":396.3,"body":"different support groups and was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":392.25,"endTime":396.3,"body":"mortified, and I wasn't sure I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":396.3,"endTime":398.82,"body":"would ever go back, because it"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":396.3,"endTime":398.82,"body":"was scary, because you'd hear"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":398.82,"endTime":401.52,"body":"things. First, I don't feel"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":398.82,"endTime":401.52,"body":"comfortable in a group of people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":401.52,"endTime":403.2,"body":"talking, and they say,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":401.52,"endTime":403.2,"body":"\"Introduce yourself.\" And I'm"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":403.2,"endTime":406.14,"body":"like, \"Ah, crud.\" So that was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":403.2,"endTime":406.14,"body":"difficult for me. And then"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":406.14,"endTime":409.26,"body":"hearing the other stages, when"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":406.14,"endTime":409.26,"body":"all I know is Dad's not remember"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":409.26,"endTime":412.95,"body":"everything now. So it was really"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":409.26,"endTime":412.95,"body":"scary. And then I thought, okay,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":412.95,"endTime":415.68,"body":"well, they suggested the savvy"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":412.95,"endTime":415.68,"body":"caregiver course, and I took"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":415.68,"endTime":419.49,"body":"that. And then once I was more"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":415.68,"endTime":419.49,"body":"immersed in it, I just wanted to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":419.49,"endTime":422.19,"body":"learn more, and the support"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":419.49,"endTime":422.19,"body":"groups were highly recommended."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":422.19,"endTime":426.3,"body":"So that's how I started. That's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":422.19,"endTime":426.3,"body":"when COVID hit. There was the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":426.3,"endTime":430.41,"body":"lockdown. So I started back with"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":426.3,"endTime":430.41,"body":"the support groups online, so I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":430.44,"endTime":431.85,"body":"only had to go to two in-person."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":432.03,"endTime":434.7,"body":"What's the difference in"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":432.03,"endTime":434.7,"body":"your estimation of an online"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":434.7,"endTime":438.12,"body":"group versus an in-person group?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":434.7,"endTime":438.12,"body":"Are they significant enough?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":438.54,"endTime":441.0,"body":"They were significant"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":438.54,"endTime":441.0,"body":"enough for me, because I work 40"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":441.0,"endTime":444.45,"body":"hours a week, so my time is"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":441.0,"endTime":444.45,"body":"limited. I'm working from home"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":444.45,"endTime":448.62,"body":"now because of COVID, and I can"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":444.45,"endTime":448.62,"body":"access the online support group"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":448.62,"endTime":451.47,"body":"much easier than taking a half"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":448.62,"endTime":451.47,"body":"hour to drive somewhere, having"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":451.47,"endTime":454.44,"body":"the group and then coming home."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":451.47,"endTime":454.44,"body":"So access is much better for me,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":454.71,"endTime":457.56,"body":"and I felt a little bit because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":454.71,"endTime":457.56,"body":"I'm nervous. I'm an introvert"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":457.56,"endTime":461.91,"body":"and a shy person, I'm more apt"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":457.56,"endTime":461.91,"body":"to participate online. At first,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":461.91,"endTime":464.61,"body":"it wasn't easy, but I'm more apt"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":461.91,"endTime":464.61,"body":"to participate online, I think"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":464.61,"endTime":466.77,"body":"now because there's that little"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":464.61,"endTime":466.77,"body":"separation."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":466.98,"endTime":470.58,"body":"So that's interesting."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":466.98,"endTime":470.58,"body":"Your response would be, both"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":470.58,"endTime":471.96,"body":"have their advantages."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":471.96,"endTime":472.47,"body":"Absolutely."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":472.59,"endTime":475.65,"body":"There's something"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":472.59,"endTime":475.65,"body":"valuable, maybe with online for"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":475.65,"endTime":478.89,"body":"people who are don't have the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":475.65,"endTime":478.89,"body":"time or a little bit more"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":478.89,"endTime":482.64,"body":"retiring in terms of their"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":478.89,"endTime":482.64,"body":"nature, might not want to go to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":482.64,"endTime":485.34,"body":"a group and find it less"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":482.64,"endTime":485.34,"body":"intimidating to be with someone"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":485.34,"endTime":488.43,"body":"online, but you still feel like"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":485.34,"endTime":488.43,"body":"you get enough interaction."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":488.61,"endTime":490.68,"body":"Oh yeah, and you get"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":488.61,"endTime":490.68,"body":"to be really good friends with"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":490.68,"endTime":493.29,"body":"some of the people because you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":490.68,"endTime":493.29,"body":"have something in common and you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":493.32,"endTime":496.95,"body":"find other interests. I'm not"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":493.32,"endTime":496.95,"body":"saying that I would prefer"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":496.98,"endTime":499.83,"body":"online right now, because of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":496.98,"endTime":499.83,"body":"time limitations and whatnot."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":500.1,"endTime":502.65,"body":"The only reason why I'm not"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":500.1,"endTime":502.65,"body":"going to in-person is because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":502.65,"endTime":505.35,"body":"online is being offered. I think"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":502.65,"endTime":505.35,"body":"it was the timing of the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":505.35,"endTime":508.62,"body":"shutdown. I had gone to two"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":505.35,"endTime":508.62,"body":"shutdown and then that was all"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":508.62,"endTime":511.56,"body":"that was offered for a while. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":508.62,"endTime":511.56,"body":"never have pursued an in-person"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":511.59,"endTime":514.74,"body":"since then. Just because I have"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":511.59,"endTime":514.74,"body":"my group, I have my tribe."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":514.98,"endTime":517.98,"body":"That might have been a"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":514.98,"endTime":517.98,"body":"fix for me. It wasn't available"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":517.98,"endTime":520.29,"body":"then; the internet was hardly"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":517.98,"endTime":520.29,"body":"available."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":520.289,"endTime":520.979,"body":"Exactly."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":521.01,"endTime":523.23,"body":"That might have been"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":521.01,"endTime":523.23,"body":"something that I would have"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":523.23,"endTime":525.48,"body":"gotten benefit from that. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":525.75,"endTime":528.93,"body":"So you use this word"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":525.75,"endTime":528.93,"body":"\"tribe\", and I heard it before"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":528.93,"endTime":532.41,"body":"doing some research on support"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":528.93,"endTime":532.41,"body":"groups. When you say tribe, what"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":532.41,"endTime":535.11,"body":"does that mean? What's the vibe"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":532.41,"endTime":535.11,"body":"that's going on?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":535.26,"endTime":537.33,"body":"For me, it's just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":535.26,"endTime":537.33,"body":"people that are in the soup with"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":537.33,"endTime":539.79,"body":"you. They're in the trenches."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":537.33,"endTime":539.79,"body":"Everybody's got a different"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":539.79,"endTime":543.24,"body":"experience. Everybody's person"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":539.79,"endTime":543.24,"body":"is a different level. But every"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":543.24,"endTime":546.0,"body":"time somebody shares, you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":543.24,"endTime":546.0,"body":"remember it later, it's like,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":546.0,"endTime":549.42,"body":"\"Oh, I remember when so-and-so"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":546.0,"endTime":549.42,"body":"said such-and-such. I can either"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":549.42,"endTime":552.81,"body":"go to her as a resource, or I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":549.42,"endTime":552.81,"body":"can research it myself, because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":552.81,"endTime":556.8,"body":"now I have an idea of what to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":552.81,"endTime":556.8,"body":"do. To me, tribe is a group of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":556.8,"endTime":558.48,"body":"peers who support each other."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":559.11,"endTime":561.36,"body":"You said something"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":559.11,"endTime":561.36,"body":"important, so your group"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":561.57,"endTime":565.38,"body":"actually participates with each"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":561.57,"endTime":565.38,"body":"other outside of just the online"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":565.38,"endTime":565.62,"body":"group."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":565.83,"endTime":568.35,"body":"Sometimes we do, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":565.83,"endTime":568.35,"body":"just depending. We don't meet as"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":568.35,"endTime":570.6,"body":"a group. We've tried a couple of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":568.35,"endTime":570.6,"body":"times. It's just too hard to get"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":570.6,"endTime":573.63,"body":"that many people together."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":570.6,"endTime":573.63,"body":"Caregivers are busy- full time"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":573.63,"endTime":576.69,"body":"caregivers. My parents are being"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":573.63,"endTime":576.69,"body":"taken care of. I just kind of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":576.69,"endTime":579.36,"body":"oversee at this point. So yeah,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":576.69,"endTime":579.36,"body":"we don't get together,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":579.72,"endTime":583.05,"body":"one-on-one yes, but not"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":579.72,"endTime":583.05,"body":"necessarily full group. But we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":583.05,"endTime":585.87,"body":"do get together, there are some"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":583.05,"endTime":585.87,"body":"field trips -I call them field"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":585.87,"endTime":587.88,"body":"trips anyway- with the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":585.87,"endTime":587.88,"body":"Alzheimer's Orange County, they"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":587.88,"endTime":590.19,"body":"do specific things where you can"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":587.88,"endTime":590.19,"body":"go whale watching for an"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":590.19,"endTime":593.79,"body":"afternoon. It's a respite for"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":590.19,"endTime":593.79,"body":"caregivers, or it's something"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":593.79,"endTime":594.6,"body":"different every time."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":594.81,"endTime":597.45,"body":"Cool. This is just a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":594.81,"endTime":597.45,"body":"quick question about your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":597.45,"endTime":600.99,"body":"caregiving. How have your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":597.45,"endTime":600.99,"body":"siblings and you work together?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":601.14,"endTime":602.4,"body":"How's that been for you?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":602.55,"endTime":603.48,"body":"I'm really lucky."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":603.51,"endTime":603.81,"body":"Oh."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":603.84,"endTime":606.09,"body":"Yeah, I'm really lucky"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":603.84,"endTime":606.09,"body":"because I hear horror stories."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":606.57,"endTime":609.3,"body":"I've got two older brothers, and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":606.57,"endTime":609.3,"body":"one lives in Washington and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":609.3,"endTime":612.18,"body":"one's in Texas. And anytime"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":609.3,"endTime":612.18,"body":"anything goes wrong with my"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":612.18,"endTime":615.78,"body":"parents, they want to know but"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":612.18,"endTime":615.78,"body":"at my own pace, because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":615.78,"endTime":617.91,"body":"sometimes you're in the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":615.78,"endTime":617.91,"body":"hospital, you're doing stuff,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":617.91,"endTime":620.55,"body":"and you just don't have the time"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":617.91,"endTime":620.55,"body":"for three or four days to speed"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":620.55,"endTime":623.64,"body":"on things, and then they're fine"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":620.55,"endTime":623.64,"body":"sitting down for a zoom call,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":623.91,"endTime":626.94,"body":"talking about ideas, just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":623.91,"endTime":626.94,"body":"supporting me, and they're real"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":626.94,"endTime":629.97,"body":"careful about, how can we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":626.94,"endTime":629.97,"body":"support you in this? And they're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":629.97,"endTime":633.3,"body":"far away. Turns out, one of my"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":629.97,"endTime":633.3,"body":"brothers, the one in Texas, is"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":633.3,"endTime":636.57,"body":"now caring for my dad. His"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":633.3,"endTime":636.57,"body":"wife's a CNA, and we moved him"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":636.57,"endTime":640.17,"body":"there. We ran across a couple of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":636.57,"endTime":640.17,"body":"problems that we couldn't solve"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":640.17,"endTime":643.38,"body":"here, and it just worked. I miss"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":640.17,"endTime":643.38,"body":"him a lot, but I wanted him to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":643.38,"endTime":645.72,"body":"be in a home where people love"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":643.38,"endTime":645.72,"body":"him and we'll take good care of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":645.72,"endTime":646.95,"body":"him, and I can trust that and-"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":646.98,"endTime":649.5,"body":"What was that like for"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":646.98,"endTime":649.5,"body":"you, to have him move?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":649.95,"endTime":651.96,"body":"Really difficult. It"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":649.95,"endTime":651.96,"body":"was really difficult to come to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":651.96,"endTime":654.9,"body":"the decision, because that was a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":651.96,"endTime":654.9,"body":"real out of the box thought. And"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":654.9,"endTime":657.3,"body":"when I thought about it, it's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":654.9,"endTime":657.3,"body":"like, \"Oh gosh. Okay, well,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":657.3,"endTime":659.64,"body":"let's see if I can get one"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":657.3,"endTime":659.64,"body":"brother on board before we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":659.64,"endTime":663.0,"body":"approached them.\" Just a lot of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":659.64,"endTime":663.0,"body":"coordination. My sister in law"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":663.0,"endTime":666.0,"body":"is a CNA. How can we give her an"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":663.0,"endTime":666.0,"body":"income so that she can quit her"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":666.0,"endTime":669.3,"body":"job and take care of dad? Will"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":666.0,"endTime":669.3,"body":"their house accommodate it?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":669.3,"endTime":671.25,"body":"They're in a very small house"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":669.3,"endTime":671.25,"body":"right now. How do we get him"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":671.25,"endTime":674.58,"body":"there without him going off the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":671.25,"endTime":674.58,"body":"deep end? Is mom going to be on"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":674.58,"endTime":676.53,"body":"board with this? Because these"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":674.58,"endTime":676.53,"body":"two have been married for, what,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":676.53,"endTime":679.56,"body":"68 years, or something like"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":676.53,"endTime":679.56,"body":"that. It was just all the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":679.56,"endTime":682.5,"body":"details. And then he was in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":679.56,"endTime":682.5,"body":"skilled nursing at the time, so"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":682.68,"endTime":687.6,"body":"how to actually choreograph the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":682.68,"endTime":687.6,"body":"whole thing was daunting, but"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":687.63,"endTime":691.32,"body":"like I said, I had my brothers"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":687.63,"endTime":691.32,"body":"in my court, and mom was on"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":691.32,"endTime":694.35,"body":"board. She thought the idea was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":691.32,"endTime":694.35,"body":"a little funny at first, to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":694.35,"endTime":697.2,"body":"think about it for a couple days"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":694.35,"endTime":697.2,"body":"and we'll rejoin and get back to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":697.2,"endTime":700.8,"body":"it. And we got it to work. He"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":697.2,"endTime":700.8,"body":"wants to come home, but he also"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":701.04,"endTime":704.31,"body":"knows that he's well taken care"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":701.04,"endTime":704.31,"body":"of. He loves where he is. People"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":704.31,"endTime":706.38,"body":"tell him he loves him all the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":704.31,"endTime":706.38,"body":"time. They've got a dog, which"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":706.38,"endTime":709.14,"body":"he just which was the saving"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":706.38,"endTime":709.14,"body":"grace, actually, when he saw"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":709.14,"endTime":711.45,"body":"that dog, because that dog will"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":709.14,"endTime":711.45,"body":"pull him out of a meltdown."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":711.72,"endTime":715.08,"body":"Because when he first got there,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":711.72,"endTime":715.08,"body":"he was really melting down, a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":715.08,"endTime":715.47,"body":"little bit."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":716.04,"endTime":719.04,"body":"Upset about having left"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":716.04,"endTime":719.04,"body":"his wife, or upset about the new"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":719.04,"endTime":719.58,"body":"environment.?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":719.58,"endTime":721.41,"body":"No, most of it was, he"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":719.58,"endTime":721.41,"body":"didn't know where he was. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":721.41,"endTime":725.19,"body":"mean, after he realized he was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":721.41,"endTime":725.19,"body":"somewhere, he was upset. You"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":725.19,"endTime":728.4,"body":"know, it's things like that,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":725.19,"endTime":728.4,"body":"large events can throw people in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":728.4,"endTime":731.49,"body":"the deep end for a while, people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":728.4,"endTime":731.49,"body":"with dementia, and it did, and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":731.49,"endTime":735.18,"body":"it took a while, and he's so"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":731.49,"endTime":735.18,"body":"much better than where he was. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":735.18,"endTime":737.01,"body":"thought we were going to lose"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":735.18,"endTime":737.01,"body":"him in skilled nursing, because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":737.01,"endTime":740.76,"body":"he just wasn't participating in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":737.01,"endTime":740.76,"body":"his own care. So he's back up to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":740.76,"endTime":743.07,"body":"where he needs to be, and I'm"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":740.76,"endTime":743.07,"body":"happy about that."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":743.37,"endTime":746.37,"body":"That's unusual. Usually,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":743.37,"endTime":746.37,"body":"if the trend starts down, it"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":746.37,"endTime":747.24,"body":"doesn't come back."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":747.24,"endTime":748.05,"body":"That's why. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":748.17,"endTime":751.56,"body":"That's terrific news."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":748.17,"endTime":751.56,"body":"Well, let's go back to your role"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":751.59,"endTime":754.38,"body":"in the support group. What was"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":751.59,"endTime":754.38,"body":"it like in the beginning for"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":754.38,"endTime":757.5,"body":"you? You said it was a little"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":754.38,"endTime":757.5,"body":"difficult talking. How did you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":757.5,"endTime":758.49,"body":"find your voice?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":758.73,"endTime":761.49,"body":"I just tried. I mean,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":758.73,"endTime":761.49,"body":"I thought, well, these people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":761.49,"endTime":764.1,"body":"are all putting their stuff out"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":761.49,"endTime":764.1,"body":"there, so I'll put my stuff out"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":764.1,"endTime":766.83,"body":"there and see how it goes. When"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":764.1,"endTime":766.83,"body":"I first started with the group,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":766.83,"endTime":770.43,"body":"it was, introduce yourself and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":766.83,"endTime":770.43,"body":"tell us what your role is. And I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":770.43,"endTime":772.8,"body":"always felt like, and I've said"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":770.43,"endTime":772.8,"body":"this before, I don't feel like a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":772.8,"endTime":775.62,"body":"caregiver, because I don't live"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":772.8,"endTime":775.62,"body":"with my person. Most people live"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":775.62,"endTime":778.44,"body":"with their loved one that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":775.62,"endTime":778.44,"body":"they're caring for. And to me,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":778.98,"endTime":783.09,"body":"that's hard, that's full time,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":778.98,"endTime":783.09,"body":"that's 24/7. So I don't feel"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":783.09,"endTime":784.65,"body":"like I'm one of them."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":784.89,"endTime":786.54,"body":"You're still a"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":784.89,"endTime":786.54,"body":"caregiver, though."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":786.78,"endTime":789.3,"body":"I get that, but it's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":786.78,"endTime":789.3,"body":"different when you gotta listen"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":789.3,"endTime":791.25,"body":"for footsteps in middle of the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":789.3,"endTime":791.25,"body":"night, and when you've got to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":791.25,"endTime":793.77,"body":"make sure the front door is not"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":791.25,"endTime":793.77,"body":"being open and things like that."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":794.07,"endTime":797.49,"body":"I'm lucky that my parents moved"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":794.07,"endTime":797.49,"body":"to a continuing care facility"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":797.67,"endTime":801.78,"body":"probably six years ago, so lot"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":797.67,"endTime":801.78,"body":"of things are taken care of that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":801.78,"endTime":805.2,"body":"I don't need to think about. So"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":801.78,"endTime":805.2,"body":"as far as me getting back to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":805.2,"endTime":808.71,"body":"your question about talking in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":805.2,"endTime":808.71,"body":"the group, I'm still"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":808.71,"endTime":811.32,"body":"uncomfortable to tell you the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":808.71,"endTime":811.32,"body":"truth, because I feel funny"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":811.32,"endTime":814.8,"body":"talking about myself with people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":811.32,"endTime":814.8,"body":"that are really in the trenches."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":815.07,"endTime":817.35,"body":"Okay, well, that's a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":815.07,"endTime":817.35,"body":"great segue into, what are the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":817.35,"endTime":821.01,"body":"dynamics of a group? How does it"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":817.35,"endTime":821.01,"body":"work? How do you make sure that"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":821.01,"endTime":823.56,"body":"everybody gets a chance to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":821.01,"endTime":823.56,"body":"participate?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":823.8,"endTime":826.86,"body":"The groups that I've"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":823.8,"endTime":826.86,"body":"been involved in, with other"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":826.86,"endTime":830.13,"body":"leaders, with other"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":826.86,"endTime":830.13,"body":"facilitators, we kind of do our"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":830.13,"endTime":832.47,"body":"group the same way because I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":830.13,"endTime":832.47,"body":"didn't have any experience doing"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":832.47,"endTime":835.71,"body":"it any other way, and it's the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":832.47,"endTime":835.71,"body":"same people that were in that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":835.71,"endTime":838.11,"body":"group that morphed into our"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":835.71,"endTime":838.11,"body":"group. The only reason we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":838.17,"endTime":841.08,"body":"morphed into our group is"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":838.17,"endTime":841.08,"body":"because one of their people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":841.08,"endTime":844.47,"body":"retired, so we only got them two"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":841.08,"endTime":844.47,"body":"Fridays a month instead of four"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":844.47,"endTime":846.87,"body":"Fridays a month. And there was a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":844.47,"endTime":846.87,"body":"need- I think it was probably"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":846.87,"endTime":849.42,"body":"around the holidays. We just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":846.87,"endTime":849.42,"body":"decided we kind of really wanted"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":849.45,"endTime":852.66,"body":"this group every Friday, so we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":849.45,"endTime":852.66,"body":"just picked up the other"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":852.66,"endTime":856.05,"body":"Fridays. And I didn't volunteer,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":852.66,"endTime":856.05,"body":"I was kind of nominated to be"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":856.05,"endTime":856.86,"body":"the person."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":857.76,"endTime":858.84,"body":"That's a compliment."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":858.84,"endTime":861.84,"body":"Well, I don't know if"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":858.84,"endTime":861.84,"body":"it was you talk enough already,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":861.84,"endTime":863.25,"body":"so you might as well just-"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":863.28,"endTime":865.71,"body":"Now, wait a minute. This"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":863.28,"endTime":865.71,"body":"is the same person that says she"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":865.71,"endTime":867.24,"body":"was nervous talking-"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":867.27,"endTime":867.54,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":867.54,"endTime":870.33,"body":"Now you've got elected"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":867.54,"endTime":870.33,"body":"into a position as a group"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":870.33,"endTime":872.16,"body":"leader, because you talk too"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":870.33,"endTime":872.16,"body":"much?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":872.19,"endTime":875.49,"body":"And I'm still"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":872.19,"endTime":875.49,"body":"uncomfortable, but as far as"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":875.52,"endTime":878.28,"body":"making sure everybody gets their"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":875.52,"endTime":878.28,"body":"turn, we just kind of patterned"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":878.28,"endTime":880.83,"body":"it. I was hoping it would be"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":878.28,"endTime":880.83,"body":"more conversational in our"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":880.83,"endTime":884.19,"body":"group, and we are a little more"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":880.83,"endTime":884.19,"body":"flexible in that area, but we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":884.19,"endTime":887.19,"body":"really do run it like whoever"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":884.19,"endTime":887.19,"body":"signed on to zoom at first. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":887.19,"endTime":890.73,"body":"would just make a list in order,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":887.19,"endTime":890.73,"body":"and we make sure, and I check in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":890.73,"endTime":893.31,"body":"periodically,or I'm trying to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":890.73,"endTime":893.31,"body":"check in. Does anybody need to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":893.31,"endTime":895.59,"body":"leave early? Should we have you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":893.31,"endTime":895.59,"body":"go first, kind of a thing."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":895.86,"endTime":898.62,"body":"That's really the only thing we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":895.86,"endTime":898.62,"body":"do, other than keep track of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":898.62,"endTime":901.29,"body":"when people got in and making"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":898.62,"endTime":901.29,"body":"sure everybody gets time. '"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":901.44,"endTime":904.68,"body":"How do you encourage"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":901.44,"endTime":904.68,"body":"someone like you or when you are"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":904.68,"endTime":907.86,"body":"on a first group to come and"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":904.68,"endTime":907.86,"body":"speak and feel comfortable?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":908.16,"endTime":910.92,"body":"I think by the time"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":908.16,"endTime":910.92,"body":"people get to our small group,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":911.16,"endTime":914.1,"body":"they've already been in the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":911.16,"endTime":914.1,"body":"other group. We haven't really"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":914.13,"endTime":917.19,"body":"had anybody come into our group"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":914.13,"endTime":917.19,"body":"that hasn't been in another"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":917.19,"endTime":918.87,"body":"group before. So I guess."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":919.08,"endTime":921.42,"body":"Well, how about when you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":919.08,"endTime":921.42,"body":"were in the large group. How did"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":921.42,"endTime":924.75,"body":"you see other people who"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":921.42,"endTime":924.75,"body":"followed you start to find their"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":924.75,"endTime":925.26,"body":"voice?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":925.53,"endTime":927.99,"body":"I think you just watch"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":925.53,"endTime":927.99,"body":"other people, and you listen,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":927.99,"endTime":931.14,"body":"and you realize that everybody's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":927.99,"endTime":931.14,"body":"there doing the same thing. Very"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":931.14,"endTime":934.56,"body":"often if we have somebody new in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":931.14,"endTime":934.56,"body":"the group, we all introduce"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":934.56,"endTime":937.44,"body":"ourselves and give a little,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":934.56,"endTime":937.44,"body":"very slight background of who"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":937.44,"endTime":940.38,"body":"we're caring for and how that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":937.44,"endTime":940.38,"body":"came. You know, that way the new"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":940.38,"endTime":944.1,"body":"person gets to know us, and then"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":940.38,"endTime":944.1,"body":"they probably feel comfortable"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":944.1,"endTime":945.63,"body":"sharing a little bit too."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":945.81,"endTime":949.11,"body":"Yeah, I found myself- I'm"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":945.81,"endTime":949.11,"body":"a little bit more outgoing than"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":949.11,"endTime":949.74,"body":"you might be-"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":949.77,"endTime":950.37,"body":"Oh, yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":951.69,"endTime":957.18,"body":"But I felt like it didn't"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":951.69,"endTime":957.18,"body":"work if people didn't share, and"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":957.18,"endTime":961.53,"body":"I had to be careful not to share"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":957.18,"endTime":961.53,"body":"too much. But I think it was if"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":961.53,"endTime":964.8,"body":"the dynamic is the group, if you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":961.53,"endTime":964.8,"body":"don't talk and you don't"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":964.8,"endTime":968.34,"body":"participate, then you can't"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":964.8,"endTime":968.34,"body":"really make everybody else feel"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":968.34,"endTime":970.59,"body":"comfortable about it. It's a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":968.34,"endTime":970.59,"body":"dynamic that starts when"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":970.59,"endTime":973.74,"body":"everybody gets involved. Did you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":970.59,"endTime":973.74,"body":"find that to be the case?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":974.28,"endTime":977.49,"body":"I think the group"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":974.28,"endTime":977.49,"body":"works when the group is all"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":977.49,"endTime":980.34,"body":"sharing, because then you can"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":977.49,"endTime":980.34,"body":"all trust, you know, everybody's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":980.34,"endTime":983.67,"body":"talking, everybody's giving"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":980.34,"endTime":983.67,"body":"their opinions and views and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":983.67,"endTime":987.48,"body":"their story. So a group won't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":983.67,"endTime":987.48,"body":"work if only one or two people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":987.48,"endTime":989.04,"body":"talk. Is that what you're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":987.48,"endTime":989.04,"body":"saying?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":989.34,"endTime":992.37,"body":"Well, I meant, I think as"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":989.34,"endTime":992.37,"body":"a person who's participating in"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":992.37,"endTime":996.18,"body":"a group, you should go into a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":992.37,"endTime":996.18,"body":"group with a sense that, \"Okay,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":996.63,"endTime":1000.14,"body":"I'vegot to be prepared to share"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":996.63,"endTime":1000.14,"body":"when it's comfortable. And the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1000.14,"endTime":1002.96,"body":"longer I'm in the group, the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1000.14,"endTime":1002.96,"body":"more comfortable I'll be, but I"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1002.96,"endTime":1006.05,"body":"can't just participate in the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1002.96,"endTime":1006.05,"body":"group.\"  And we never said that"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1006.05,"endTime":1006.68,"body":"to anybody-"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1006.71,"endTime":1007.07,"body":"Right."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1007.07,"endTime":1010.28,"body":"-that you have to talk."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1007.07,"endTime":1010.28,"body":"But I think it became part of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1010.31,"endTime":1013.73,"body":"second nature, which is like,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1010.31,"endTime":1013.73,"body":"you know, peer group, maybe a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1013.73,"endTime":1017.12,"body":"little bit. And I was curious"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1013.73,"endTime":1017.12,"body":"whether or not your groups were"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1017.12,"endTime":1018.08,"body":"operating that way."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1018.44,"endTime":1021.47,"body":"I think that when you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1018.44,"endTime":1021.47,"body":"are finally in an environment"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1021.47,"endTime":1025.04,"body":"where everybody has an idea of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1021.47,"endTime":1025.04,"body":"what you're going through. It's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1025.13,"endTime":1028.43,"body":"morecomforting. Out in the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1025.13,"endTime":1028.43,"body":"general world, people don't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1028.43,"endTime":1031.88,"body":"really, people don't get it. So"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1028.43,"endTime":1031.88,"body":"you're hesitant to bring stuff"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1031.88,"endTime":1034.13,"body":"up, because they ask questions"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1031.88,"endTime":1034.13,"body":"like \"Well, couldn't you just..\""},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1034.13,"endTime":1037.4,"body":"And you're like, \"No, and I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1034.13,"endTime":1037.4,"body":"don't want to explain why,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1037.43,"endTime":1041.06,"body":"because it's too long.\" So I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1037.43,"endTime":1041.06,"body":"think when you're in a group"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1041.06,"endTime":1043.28,"body":"where people get it, it's a lot"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1041.06,"endTime":1043.28,"body":"different."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1043.579,"endTime":1046.069,"body":"Speaking about getting"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1043.579,"endTime":1046.069,"body":"it, what's some of the most"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1046.069,"endTime":1050.059,"body":"challenging conversations that"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1046.069,"endTime":1050.059,"body":"you've had, either in your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1050.089,"endTime":1052.729,"body":"larger group when you first"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1050.089,"endTime":1052.729,"body":"joined or in running a group?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1053.18,"endTime":1056.27,"body":"Well just talking"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1053.18,"endTime":1056.27,"body":"about death, talking about when"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1056.27,"endTime":1060.05,"body":"to take people off certain"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1056.27,"endTime":1060.05,"body":"medications, is that the right"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1060.05,"endTime":1064.55,"body":"thing to do is it not? Guilt"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1060.05,"endTime":1064.55,"body":"about maybe making that decision"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1064.61,"endTime":1068.06,"body":"or not making the decision."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1064.61,"endTime":1068.06,"body":"Feelings of loneliness when"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1068.3,"endTime":1070.55,"body":"you've got somebody sitting"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1068.3,"endTime":1070.55,"body":"right next to you."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1070.94,"endTime":1074.06,"body":"Spouses,there's a lot of spouses"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1070.94,"endTime":1074.06,"body":"in our group, and I can't even"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1074.06,"endTime":1076.67,"body":"imagine what that's like, the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1074.06,"endTime":1076.67,"body":"whole role has changed. I'm just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1076.67,"endTime":1080.21,"body":"really fascinated by watching"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1076.67,"endTime":1080.21,"body":"the men, because the men in my"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1080.21,"endTime":1084.35,"body":"group are from a generation"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1080.21,"endTime":1084.35,"body":"where not that far back, but a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1084.35,"endTime":1087.74,"body":"generation where typically the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1084.35,"endTime":1087.74,"body":"man was earning the money, the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1087.74,"endTime":1090.5,"body":"wife was more a supportive role."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1087.74,"endTime":1090.5,"body":"I don't know if I can say that?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1090.53,"endTime":1090.92,"body":"Sure you can."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1090.92,"endTime":1092.57,"body":"But you know what I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1090.92,"endTime":1092.57,"body":"mean? They're not necessarily"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1092.57,"endTime":1096.83,"body":"the nurturer, and now they have"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1092.57,"endTime":1096.83,"body":"come to be a nurturer. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1096.83,"endTime":1100.52,"body":"fascinated, and I see the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1096.83,"endTime":1100.52,"body":"transition, then you have to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1100.52,"endTime":1104.75,"body":"tell them, \"Gosh, I'm so, so"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1100.52,"endTime":1104.75,"body":"excited to see you, because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1104.75,"endTime":1107.63,"body":"you're making this journey all"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1104.75,"endTime":1107.63,"body":"by yourself, and you're figuring"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1107.63,"endTime":1110.18,"body":"it out.\" Because you see people"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1107.63,"endTime":1110.18,"body":"that are, you know, they first"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1110.18,"endTime":1112.43,"body":"get in, or they first encounter"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1110.18,"endTime":1112.43,"body":"something, and it's rigid."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1112.52,"endTime":1114.77,"body":"\"Well, she needs to be taking"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1112.52,"endTime":1114.77,"body":"her pills at this time, and she"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1114.77,"endTime":1117.68,"body":"needs to take a nap..\" And then"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1114.77,"endTime":1117.68,"body":"they learn, and everybody's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1117.68,"endTime":1120.08,"body":"happier if you can be a little"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1117.68,"endTime":1120.08,"body":"more flexible."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1120.53,"endTime":1124.64,"body":"Didn't you find it"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1120.53,"endTime":1124.64,"body":"took a little while to get men"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1124.67,"endTime":1130.1,"body":"to share as much as probably"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1124.67,"endTime":1130.1,"body":"women are. Women share more"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1130.1,"endTime":1131.81,"body":"easily, it seems to me."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1131.93,"endTime":1134.84,"body":"Well actually, I started"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1131.93,"endTime":1134.84,"body":"in a women's group at the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1134.87,"endTime":1137.99,"body":"facility. Oh, I shouldn't say a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1134.87,"endTime":1137.99,"body":"women's group. It was just me"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1138.05,"endTime":1141.53,"body":"and only other women who came. I"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1138.05,"endTime":1141.53,"body":"don't think it was designated as"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1141.56,"endTime":1145.16,"body":"a woman's group. Yeah, I think"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1141.56,"endTime":1145.16,"body":"that was easier for them to talk"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1145.16,"endTime":1148.25,"body":"about their own personal"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1145.16,"endTime":1148.25,"body":"situation. I think for guys,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1148.25,"endTime":1151.1,"body":"that's the hardest thing,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1148.25,"endTime":1151.1,"body":"they're comfortable. We used to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1151.1,"endTime":1154.79,"body":"laugh in our group because there"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1151.1,"endTime":1154.79,"body":"was a newbie. He would only talk"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1154.82,"endTime":1158.09,"body":"about his wife and the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1154.82,"endTime":1158.09,"body":"situation. He would never talk"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1158.09,"endTime":1161.99,"body":"about himself. Getting guys to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1158.09,"endTime":1161.99,"body":"unload about their own personal"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1161.99,"endTime":1165.68,"body":"feelings and situations was"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1161.99,"endTime":1165.68,"body":"hard. Once that was broken,I"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1165.95,"endTime":1167.96,"body":"think guys felt much more"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1165.95,"endTime":1167.96,"body":"comfortable."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1168.2,"endTime":1168.77,"body":"Interesting."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1168.95,"endTime":1170.42,"body":"I'm glad you said"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1168.95,"endTime":1170.42,"body":"that. I'm going to pay more"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1170.42,"endTime":1171.95,"body":"attention to that, but you're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1170.42,"endTime":1171.95,"body":"right."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1172.25,"endTime":1174.89,"body":"Well we all learn in"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1172.25,"endTime":1174.89,"body":"different ways. Speaking of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1174.89,"endTime":1178.37,"body":"learning, I want to cover a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1174.89,"endTime":1178.37,"body":"couple of key questions. How was"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1178.37,"endTime":1181.91,"body":"joining a support group changed"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1178.37,"endTime":1181.91,"body":"your approach to caregiving?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1182.09,"endTime":1184.76,"body":"Well, I'm not as"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1182.09,"endTime":1184.76,"body":"scared. I mean thinking about"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1184.76,"endTime":1188.09,"body":"outcomes and whatnot, because I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1184.76,"endTime":1188.09,"body":"feel like there's path or"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1188.09,"endTime":1190.82,"body":"there's resources. Everybody"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1188.09,"endTime":1190.82,"body":"brings something else to the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1190.82,"endTime":1194.06,"body":"table. It's not just where we"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1190.82,"endTime":1194.06,"body":"started with Alzheimer's Orange"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1194.06,"endTime":1196.91,"body":"County. Everybody reaches out to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1194.06,"endTime":1196.91,"body":"different resources, and we all"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1196.91,"endTime":1200.42,"body":"become a community of resources."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1196.91,"endTime":1200.42,"body":"How has it changed? It'schanged,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1200.42,"endTime":1203.27,"body":"because I just basically feel a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1200.42,"endTime":1203.27,"body":"little more confident in the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1203.27,"endTime":1207.17,"body":"whole process, instead of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1203.27,"endTime":1207.17,"body":"wondering, \"What the heck? Okay,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1207.17,"endTime":1210.05,"body":"well, I'll try this, or I'll try"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1207.17,"endTime":1210.05,"body":"that.\" I can approach it more"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1210.05,"endTime":1212.9,"body":"intelligently, if that makes any"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1210.05,"endTime":1212.9,"body":"sense at all. Feels more"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1212.9,"endTime":1215.96,"body":"intelligently. It may not look"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1212.9,"endTime":1215.96,"body":"like it, but it feels like it."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1216.71,"endTime":1219.92,"body":"You used the word"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1216.71,"endTime":1219.92,"body":"confidence. And I think you.. I"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1219.92,"endTime":1221.72,"body":"was like, \"What am I in for?\""},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1221.81,"endTime":1222.14,"body":"Exactly."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1222.14,"endTime":1224.81,"body":"I had no idea. And the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1222.14,"endTime":1224.81,"body":"more I talked to other people,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1224.81,"endTime":1227.84,"body":"the more I realized that, you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1224.81,"endTime":1227.84,"body":"know, I wasn't doing such a bad"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1227.84,"endTime":1232.58,"body":"job. And I gave my confidence to"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1227.84,"endTime":1232.58,"body":"me about feeling like I could"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1232.58,"endTime":1236.09,"body":"move forward. And as it"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1232.58,"endTime":1236.09,"body":"progressed, I knew a little bit"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1236.09,"endTime":1239.48,"body":"more about what was coming,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1236.09,"endTime":1239.48,"body":"which was helpful. So I think"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1239.48,"endTime":1242.51,"body":"confidence is a big thing that"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1239.48,"endTime":1242.51,"body":"you get from a support group."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1242.75,"endTime":1245.87,"body":"I watch people that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1242.75,"endTime":1245.87,"body":"come in to the big group, the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1245.87,"endTime":1250.55,"body":"first group, and they're usually"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1245.87,"endTime":1250.55,"body":"at their wit's end because they"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1250.55,"endTime":1253.13,"body":"haven't had the resources and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1250.55,"endTime":1253.13,"body":"they haven't had the support."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1253.52,"endTime":1256.52,"body":"It's nice to see them feel a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1253.52,"endTime":1256.52,"body":"sense of comfort and a light at"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1256.52,"endTime":1257.9,"body":"the end of the tunnel kind of a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1256.52,"endTime":1257.9,"body":"thing."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1258.02,"endTime":1260.48,"body":"Let's explain so our"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1258.02,"endTime":1260.48,"body":"audience understands when you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1260.48,"endTime":1264.05,"body":"talk about the big group, that's"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1260.48,"endTime":1264.05,"body":"the main online group that's"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1264.05,"endTime":1265.31,"body":"meeting twice a month?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1265.34,"endTime":1265.94,"body":"Yes."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1266.0,"endTime":1270.17,"body":"And then your group, your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1266.0,"endTime":1270.17,"body":"smaller group, is meeting the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1270.17,"endTime":1271.37,"body":"other two times a month."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1271.4,"endTime":1273.44,"body":"Or three, depending if"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1271.4,"endTime":1273.44,"body":"there's three Fridays, yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1273.59,"endTime":1275.03,"body":"Wow, that's a lot of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1273.59,"endTime":1275.03,"body":"meetings."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1275.06,"endTime":1275.72,"body":"It is a lot."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1275.81,"endTime":1277.4,"body":"Wait, they're"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1275.81,"endTime":1277.4,"body":"different groups."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1277.49,"endTime":1278.3,"body":"It's a subgroup."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1278.45,"endTime":1280.37,"body":"It's a subgroup, okay."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1280.58,"endTime":1281.57,"body":"Would that be a fair"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1280.58,"endTime":1281.57,"body":"statement?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1281.57,"endTime":1284.6,"body":"Yeah, because all the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1281.57,"endTime":1284.6,"body":"people in the small subgroup"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1284.66,"endTime":1287.0,"body":"basically came from the bigger"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1284.66,"endTime":1287.0,"body":"group. You know, we didn't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1287.0,"endTime":1290.78,"body":"recruit people, although there's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1287.0,"endTime":1290.78,"body":"no reason why we can't. It just"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1290.78,"endTime":1293.24,"body":"happened that way, and it, I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1290.78,"endTime":1293.24,"body":"don't want it to get big,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1293.24,"endTime":1296.33,"body":"because it's just me, and I'm"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1293.24,"endTime":1296.33,"body":"not a professional facilitator."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1296.33,"endTime":1296.87,"body":"I'm just like-"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1296.87,"endTime":1298.4,"body":"What's the number of"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1296.87,"endTime":1298.4,"body":"people?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1298.43,"endTime":1301.49,"body":"We can have, 7 to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1298.43,"endTime":1301.49,"body":"13/14, something like that."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1301.49,"endTime":1301.82,"body":"Okay?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1302.09,"endTime":1303.98,"body":"And sometimes in the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1302.09,"endTime":1303.98,"body":"big group, they have two"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1303.98,"endTime":1306.56,"body":"facilitators running that group."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1303.98,"endTime":1306.56,"body":"Now, sometimes they have to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1306.56,"endTime":1308.93,"body":"split it in half because they're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1306.56,"endTime":1308.93,"body":"afraid not everybody will get a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1308.93,"endTime":1312.68,"body":"chance to share. So we start out"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1308.93,"endTime":1312.68,"body":"together, then they split it in"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1312.68,"endTime":1314.48,"body":"half, and then we all come back"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1312.68,"endTime":1314.48,"body":"at the end."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1315.5,"endTime":1318.08,"body":"That's cool. Were you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1315.5,"endTime":1318.08,"body":"ever afraid of breaking down"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1318.08,"endTime":1319.34,"body":"emotionally in your group?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1319.67,"endTime":1320.57,"body":"I don't think so."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1320.84,"endTime":1321.32,"body":"Did you?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1321.53,"endTime":1322.4,"body":"I think I have."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1322.67,"endTime":1323.54,"body":"And what was that like?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1323.66,"endTime":1327.17,"body":"I can't even- it was a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1323.66,"endTime":1327.17,"body":"non event if it happened. That's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1327.17,"endTime":1328.25,"body":"not something I'm scared of."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1328.25,"endTime":1328.49,"body":"Did you cry?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1328.64,"endTime":1332.51,"body":"I may have probably,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1328.64,"endTime":1332.51,"body":"I'm a crier, so probably, or at"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1332.51,"endTime":1334.16,"body":"least, teared up or something."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1332.51,"endTime":1334.16,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1334.43,"endTime":1337.34,"body":"Is it okay, in your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1334.43,"endTime":1337.34,"body":"estimation? Do others cry?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1337.43,"endTime":1337.85,"body":"Yeah."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1338.12,"endTime":1338.87,"body":"Is it healthy?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1339.14,"endTime":1342.17,"body":"I think so. To"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1339.14,"endTime":1342.17,"body":"release. I think it's important"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1342.17,"endTime":1345.71,"body":"for other people to see you get"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1342.17,"endTime":1345.71,"body":"emotional too, or angry or"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1345.71,"endTime":1346.55,"body":"anything else."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1346.76,"endTime":1349.28,"body":"Okay, let's talk about"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1346.76,"endTime":1349.28,"body":"some advice to caregivers."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1349.28,"endTime":1353.12,"body":"You're doing a great job, by the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1349.28,"endTime":1353.12,"body":"way. What would you wish you had"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1353.12,"endTime":1356.99,"body":"known earlier about the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1353.12,"endTime":1356.99,"body":"caregiving journey that you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1356.99,"endTime":1359.9,"body":"learned in any fashion, but"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1356.99,"endTime":1359.9,"body":"maybe as a part of the group?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1360.26,"endTime":1362.51,"body":"That there's help out"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1360.26,"endTime":1362.51,"body":"there, that you don't have to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1362.51,"endTime":1365.87,"body":"feel alone. Really nice if you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1362.51,"endTime":1365.87,"body":"have family members who are"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1365.87,"endTime":1368.51,"body":"interested in helping, because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1365.87,"endTime":1368.51,"body":"I've seen where that hasn't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1368.51,"endTime":1371.39,"body":"happened, and it's so sad when"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1368.51,"endTime":1371.39,"body":"people have to fight their"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1371.39,"endTime":1374.03,"body":"family members just to get the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1371.39,"endTime":1374.03,"body":"best for their person, their"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1374.03,"endTime":1374.57,"body":"loved one."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1374.81,"endTime":1376.76,"body":"Yeah we spoke a little"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1374.81,"endTime":1376.76,"body":"bit about that. I'm not gonna go"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1376.76,"endTime":1380.24,"body":"down that hole, because that's a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1376.76,"endTime":1380.24,"body":"dark hole. Well, you're"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1380.24,"endTime":1384.08,"body":"caregiving indirectly for your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1380.24,"endTime":1384.08,"body":"dad now, but you're still"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1384.08,"endTime":1387.32,"body":"caregiving for your mom, right?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1384.08,"endTime":1387.32,"body":"So it doesn't go away."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1387.35,"endTime":1389.27,"body":"It doesn't go away"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1387.35,"endTime":1389.27,"body":"because there's surgeries and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1389.27,"endTime":1391.67,"body":"there's pancreatitis, there's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1389.27,"endTime":1391.67,"body":"all kinds of things that happen,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1391.67,"endTime":1394.55,"body":"and when they hit boom, boom,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1391.67,"endTime":1394.55,"body":"boom, you don't have a time to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1394.55,"endTime":1395.24,"body":"catch your breath."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1399.11,"endTime":1402.02,"body":"What advice would you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1399.11,"endTime":1402.02,"body":"give to caregivers who are"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1402.02,"endTime":1403.73,"body":"hesitant to join a group?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1403.97,"endTime":1406.73,"body":"Give it a try. It's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1403.97,"endTime":1406.73,"body":"the only way to do it is to jump"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1406.73,"endTime":1407.66,"body":"in and give it a try."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1407.84,"endTime":1409.61,"body":"Anything else that you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1407.84,"endTime":1409.61,"body":"would say about it?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1409.76,"endTime":1412.7,"body":"Try and be honest, try"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1409.76,"endTime":1412.7,"body":"and share. Listen to what other"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1412.7,"endTime":1415.04,"body":"people are saying, because it"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1412.7,"endTime":1415.04,"body":"will help you at some point down"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1415.04,"endTime":1419.27,"body":"the line, probably, and just be"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1415.04,"endTime":1419.27,"body":"open, be open to the experience."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1419.72,"endTime":1421.7,"body":"I was going to ask you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1419.72,"endTime":1421.7,"body":"this question, because I watched"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1421.7,"endTime":1425.06,"body":"a guy in our group feel the same"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1421.7,"endTime":1425.06,"body":"way you did, overwhelmed. The"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1425.06,"endTime":1428.6,"body":"group was a very active group at"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1425.06,"endTime":1428.6,"body":"the time he joined, and he was a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1428.6,"endTime":1432.05,"body":"note taker, and he was busy"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1428.6,"endTime":1432.05,"body":"writing notes, and at the end of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1432.05,"endTime":1435.05,"body":"it, you could just see him close"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1432.05,"endTime":1435.05,"body":"up, not only his book, but"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1435.05,"endTime":1438.92,"body":"almost his mind. Like, I'm out"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1435.05,"endTime":1438.92,"body":"of my element. I'm overwhelmed."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1439.1,"endTime":1441.62,"body":"You feel any of those feelings?"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1439.1,"endTime":1441.62,"body":"Did you see that happen in your"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1441.62,"endTime":1442.07,"body":"groups?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1442.28,"endTime":1445.97,"body":"I felt that way myself"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1442.28,"endTime":1445.97,"body":"in the first two that I went to,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1446.0,"endTime":1450.74,"body":"I tried again. I tried again. I"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1446.0,"endTime":1450.74,"body":"just I've been in therapy myself"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1450.74,"endTime":1454.19,"body":"before, and the first time is"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1450.74,"endTime":1454.19,"body":"always awkward and weird, but if"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1454.19,"endTime":1457.52,"body":"you feel like you want to reach"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1454.19,"endTime":1457.52,"body":"out for help, you just kind of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1457.52,"endTime":1460.16,"body":"have to keep trying until you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1457.52,"endTime":1460.16,"body":"find something that works. Might"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1460.16,"endTime":1462.2,"body":"not be the right group. Maybe"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1460.16,"endTime":1462.2,"body":"you need to try a different"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1462.2,"endTime":1464.87,"body":"group. Maybe you need to do an"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1462.2,"endTime":1464.87,"body":"online you know, there's so many"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1464.87,"endTime":1467.81,"body":"different ways to get help or"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1464.87,"endTime":1467.81,"body":"get support. There's so many"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1467.81,"endTime":1470.84,"body":"different support groups that if"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1467.81,"endTime":1470.84,"body":"one doesn't work, try another"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1470.84,"endTime":1473.63,"body":"one, because it's worth it. You"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1470.84,"endTime":1473.63,"body":"learn so much."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1473.96,"endTime":1476.0,"body":"Ruth Ann, you talked a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1473.96,"endTime":1476.0,"body":"great deal with lots of good"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1476.0,"endTime":1479.03,"body":"information about support"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1476.0,"endTime":1479.03,"body":"groups. But if you had to think"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1479.03,"endTime":1482.09,"body":"in just a caregiver itself, what"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1479.03,"endTime":1482.09,"body":"piece of advice would you give"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1482.09,"endTime":1483.05,"body":"to caregivers?"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1483.38,"endTime":1486.08,"body":"The advice I would"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1483.38,"endTime":1486.08,"body":"give would be to be open to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1486.08,"endTime":1489.44,"body":"learning as much as you can"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1486.08,"endTime":1489.44,"body":"about whatever situation you're"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1489.44,"endTime":1492.71,"body":"going through, but mostly to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1489.44,"endTime":1492.71,"body":"take care of yourself. It's"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1492.71,"endTime":1495.62,"body":"something that I find great"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1492.71,"endTime":1495.62,"body":"difficulty in. I've been sick a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1495.62,"endTime":1498.38,"body":"lot in the last few months"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1495.62,"endTime":1498.38,"body":"because I'm not taking care of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1498.38,"endTime":1502.52,"body":"myself. Can't live on protein"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1498.38,"endTime":1502.52,"body":"bars and peanuts and lack of"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1502.52,"endTime":1506.3,"body":"sleep for very long. I've tried."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1502.52,"endTime":1506.3,"body":"I know it's hard to do because"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1506.3,"endTime":1509.24,"body":"you think you can weather the"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1506.3,"endTime":1509.24,"body":"storm, but there's always"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1509.24,"endTime":1513.17,"body":"another storm. There's always a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1509.24,"endTime":1513.17,"body":"reason to put yourself last, and"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1513.44,"endTime":1517.49,"body":"it's harder to do than to say."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1513.44,"endTime":1517.49,"body":"But if you can put yourself at"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1517.49,"endTime":1520.16,"body":"least somewhere up on that"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1517.49,"endTime":1520.16,"body":"ladder instead of at the bottom"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1520.16,"endTime":1521.66,"body":"rung, you'll do much better."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1522.02,"endTime":1524.84,"body":"Well, I think that's a"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1522.02,"endTime":1524.84,"body":"pretty good concluding comment."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1525.98,"endTime":1527.69,"body":"Virginia, any last comments?"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1527.72,"endTime":1530.72,"body":"Well this just"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1527.72,"endTime":1530.72,"body":"confirms my thoughts that I"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1530.72,"endTime":1534.68,"body":"should have searched out more"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1530.72,"endTime":1534.68,"body":"different support groups. If"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1534.68,"endTime":1537.71,"body":"that one wasn't a fit for me,"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1534.68,"endTime":1537.71,"body":"there was probably one out there"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1537.71,"endTime":1540.11,"body":"that would have been and I would"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1537.71,"endTime":1540.11,"body":"have benefited."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1540.38,"endTime":1542.84,"body":"I can understand your"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1540.38,"endTime":1542.84,"body":"hesitancy to try again, though,"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1542.84,"endTime":1546.83,"body":"because I felt the way you did."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1542.84,"endTime":1546.83,"body":"It's not that the fit wasn't"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1546.83,"endTime":1548.87,"body":"right, it's the content was"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1546.83,"endTime":1548.87,"body":"frightening."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1549.02,"endTime":1549.86,"body":"It was frightening."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1549.89,"endTime":1552.5,"body":"There wouldn't be any"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1549.89,"endTime":1552.5,"body":"reason to reach out again if you"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1552.5,"endTime":1555.35,"body":"expected the content to be"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1552.5,"endTime":1555.35,"body":"frightening still. Just a"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1555.35,"endTime":1556.34,"body":"different group, right?"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1556.58,"endTime":1557.15,"body":"Right, right."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1557.15,"endTime":1559.46,"body":"You kind of have to"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1557.15,"endTime":1559.46,"body":"advocate for yourself. I guess"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1559.46,"endTime":1561.74,"body":"it's really what you need to do."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1559.46,"endTime":1561.74,"body":"And I don't think caregivers do"},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1561.74,"endTime":1562.31,"body":"that much."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1562.73,"endTime":1564.95,"body":"Yeah, I think that that's"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1562.73,"endTime":1564.95,"body":"an important point that you're"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1564.95,"endTime":1569.63,"body":"making, that the group is can be"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1564.95,"endTime":1569.63,"body":"challenging and can be helpful,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1569.84,"endTime":1573.74,"body":"and it's getting over the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1569.84,"endTime":1573.74,"body":"challenging parts to get to the"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1573.74,"endTime":1577.64,"body":"help, and the help far exceeds"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1573.74,"endTime":1577.64,"body":"the initial challenges you'll"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1577.64,"endTime":1581.03,"body":"feel potentially but understand"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1577.64,"endTime":1581.03,"body":"that it might be a little bit"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1581.09,"endTime":1583.52,"body":"because you're entering"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1581.09,"endTime":1583.52,"body":"something that's already going"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1583.52,"endTime":1586.91,"body":"on, but the help is so much"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1583.52,"endTime":1586.91,"body":"greater than the challenge."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1587.12,"endTime":1590.63,"body":"Well, thank you again. Ruth Ann,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1587.12,"endTime":1590.63,"body":"you were spectacular."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1590.63,"endTime":1591.59,"body":"Thank you so much."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1591.62,"endTime":1592.25,"body":"You're very welcome."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1592.25,"endTime":1594.5,"body":"Really, really"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1592.25,"endTime":1594.5,"body":"interesting information and very"},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1594.5,"endTime":1594.92,"body":"helpful."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1595.01,"endTime":1595.55,"body":"Thank you."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1595.7,"endTime":1599.78,"body":"I just wanted to mention"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1595.7,"endTime":1599.78,"body":"that Virginia and I are always"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1599.78,"endTime":1603.32,"body":"interested in topics that you"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1599.78,"endTime":1603.32,"body":"might have. I think this is"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1603.32,"endTime":1608.15,"body":"number 47 of podcasts that we've"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1603.32,"endTime":1608.15,"body":"done, and it's available"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1608.15,"endTime":1611.81,"body":"everywhere. Spotlight on Care is"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1608.15,"endTime":1611.81,"body":"available through all sorts of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1611.81,"endTime":1616.01,"body":"podcast services. And now we"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1611.81,"endTime":1616.01,"body":"have a YouTube page, and you can"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1616.01,"endTime":1620.18,"body":"go to that page and subscribe,"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1616.01,"endTime":1620.18,"body":"and we'll be informing you about"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1620.18,"endTime":1624.05,"body":"new podcasts that come up, just"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1620.18,"endTime":1624.05,"body":"in case you might miss them. So"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1624.08,"endTime":1627.29,"body":"thanks for taking the time and"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1624.08,"endTime":1627.29,"body":"listening to us and again. Thank"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1627.29,"endTime":1628.97,"body":"you. Ruth Ann, you were really"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1627.29,"endTime":1628.97,"body":"good."},{"speaker":"Ruth Ann","startTime":1629.18,"endTime":1629.93,"body":"Thank you very much."},{"speaker":"Virginia","startTime":1629.96,"endTime":1630.56,"body":"Thanks Ruth Ann."},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1631.37,"endTime":1633.92,"body":"Spotlight on Care is"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1631.37,"endTime":1633.92,"body":"produced by the University of"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1633.92,"endTime":1637.01,"body":"California, Irvine, Institute on"},{"speaker":"Steve","startTime":1633.92,"endTime":1637.01,"body":"Memory Impairments and"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1637.01,"endTime":1641.33,"body":"UCI"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1637.01,"endTime":1641.33,"body":"MIND. Interviews focus on"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1641.33,"endTime":1644.75,"body":"personal caregiving journeys,"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1641.33,"endTime":1644.75,"body":"and may not represent the views"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1644.75,"endTime":1648.29,"body":"of UCI MIND. Individuals"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1644.75,"endTime":1648.29,"body":"concerned about cognitive"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1648.29,"endTime":1651.62,"body":"disorders, prevention or"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1648.29,"endTime":1651.62,"body":"treatment should seek expert"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1651.62,"endTime":1654.89,"body":"diagnosis and care. Please"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1651.62,"endTime":1654.89,"body":"subscribe to the Spotlight on"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1654.89,"endTime":1658.28,"body":"Care podcast wherever you"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1654.89,"endTime":1658.28,"body":"listen. For more information,"},{"speaker":"Neurological Disorders","startTime":1658.31,"endTime":1661.88,"body":"visit mind.uci.edu."}]}