Conversation with Canada Expat Abdulla

In this episode, Yemen-born Abdulla talks about finding travel opportunities by befriending strangers, using your travel experiences in your office environment, and getting through the days during COVID shutdowns.

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Transcript

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[00:00:00] [00:00:00] Nyra: [00:00:00] The number one question I get about being an expat is how does one live and work abroad? So I created it this podcast to share with you the ways in which you can unlock your own expert lifestyle and find out all of the different ways that my guests have used their passports as a catalyst for unlocking the adventure. That is the ex-pat lifestyle. So come on, let's push through those barriers that have been standing in your way and globally connect. 

[00:00:29] We're in the midst of COVID we're in midst of quarantine. We bought to be put on, I think, on another, stay-at-home mandate, New Jersey and which is where I'm at right now, quarantining with my mother and two other senior citizens in the house. And you know, I have to say the first round was pretty hard. Well, I don't think there's no real adjustment, you know, you just it’s like being in prison. Like nobody, you know, gets used to prison. You know what I'm saying? You just learn to adjust, and you learn, find ways to manage your time and stay occupied and stay, you know, function.

[00:01:10] Yeah, yeah. Productivity. Yeah. You have to be productive. Right. So with that said, Take us through a day, an Abdullah quarantine day. If you want to, if you want to go down memory lane, you could ask, you can share, you know, a day in the life living in.Abudabi

[00:01:39]Abdulla: [00:01:39] No, I initially started with the whole the whole what? Okay. We can't go out. We can't have, we can't. We can't do much of the normal things we used to do. So [00:02:00] how can I save, how can I keep my sanity? And, you know, the immediate instinct was join courses, join workshops. Well, I, my family and that's quarantined together, and it was kind of fortunate also to have my nephew born just in the beginning of it.

[00:02:20] It gave me a sense of sense of being in a parental leave. So a day a day was wake up in the morning, chat with my family about the world where we are. And we try not to talk about COVID we try to make it. So, so we talked about how, you know, how our family treat is, how does it look like now? Any other topic than that?

[00:02:43] Yeah. Yeah. And it was very insightful. I didn't know that I had that much, that many family members and we know sometimes we just go on Instagram or Google and find out jokes. And we, I just call out jokes all morning for two hours. So that's how I started. 

[00:03:05] They're not happy campers in the morning. They don't like this.

[00:03:11] Nyra: [00:03:11] Hey, been learning about up there, like the joke. Have you learned anything new? Like, have you learned anything new about your family? or yourself, please do share. 

[00:03:28]Abdulla: [00:03:28] We can tolerate each other. There was also a question for me cause you know, I've grown up away from them for a long time. Yeah. And I was wondering how would that work if we have to be locked up in the same house for months and months?

[00:03:43] And I guess now I have the answer. I think we all have the answers don't, you we 

[00:03:47] Nyra: [00:03:47] it's a little bit, a little bit. 

[00:03:49] Abdulla: [00:03:49] I try to make it interesting. I couldn't leave the house. 

[00:03:53] Nyra: [00:03:53] Oh, that's okay. 

[00:03:55] Abdulla: [00:03:55] Yeah. My nephew has the flu. [00:04:00] Oh yeah. So, we're staying home now. 

[00:04:03] Nyra: [00:04:03] Okay. 

[00:04:05] Abdulla: [00:04:05] I'm showing you something. I don't show it to people. My own desk, office, and genuinely, this is how, okay. Maybe it has more papers. I removed the papers, but then, but then this is how it looks like I always have my, I always have my two flags. My two honors flags always have my pictures, but this is, this is not just pictures that we can go through.

[00:04:32] And we can, we can look at it if you want, but usually have like pictures that I've taken from my own trips as my background. Cause whenever I'm in stress, whenever I'm in stress mode and this is my work zone, right? So this is the zone where I focused on things and whenever I'm stressed and takes over me. And just when escape, all I have to do is minimize. Minimize the window and I'm in a different world. I go back in memory, 

[00:04:56] Nyra: [00:04:56] I see you have three pictures there. 

[00:04:59] Abdulla: [00:04:59] I got to two, but I've got this one, which I didn't take. This is the only piece of support that I have. And you can't see it from there, but it's the only piece of work that I have that that is not something that I've worked on or I've shot. But I like it because it reminds me. Funny enough, it was taken in Japan or it was drawn in Japan and I've been to Japan, but it doesn't remind me of Japan. It reminds me of Mumbai. 

[00:05:26] Nyra: [00:05:26] It reminds you of Mumbai

[00:05:29] Abdulla: [00:05:29] Mumbai has got those dark alleys at night. It's such a hustle and bustle city, but then just around the Taj Mahal hotel, it goes really quiet. And all you hear is the sound of the rain and a monsoon. And that's when I went there, and it just has a vivid memory of it. And I keep it there because it reminds me of India. My first hiking trip, my first hiking trip was in India. 

[00:05:57] Nyra: [00:05:57] You don't hear Very often. At least [00:06:00] I haven't heard often, even in my travels, I know people that have traveled to India, I've traveled to India. And there's just so much, you can spend like 45 days in India and still not have seen all of India. Right. But You never see people put pictures up unless they're like a native of India. Like, you know, it's not like, look at India, you might have here's the mountain that I climbed its me in the ocean. And 

[00:06:26] Abdulla: [00:06:26] I always had that picture of India that it's just slums and maybe a few metropolitans, but then, but then that was my, that was the end of it. I did, I didn't expect to see Tea Valley that. That looks exactly like Switzerland to somewhere in Europe. I didn't expect that that was such a surprise to me. And then when I went up North, you could see the Himalayas, the beginning tale of the Himalayas right after passing by through Pakistan. And it's even just more breathtaking, you know, you stand, stand in front of them.

[00:06:58] You have no words to describe, but yeah, if India has such a big variety of scenery, it's insane. Crazy is that none of it is. Or not, not a lot of it is brought from outside India. So the Tea valleys that you see in Southern India are tea leaves that were brought from China by the British or during the British and that's when they start to grow them. And now they're, they're, they're, they're one of the top key exporters in the world, Indian tea, 

[00:07:29] Nyra: [00:07:29] Indian tea. You know, I learned a lot about spices when I was there. Yeah. You know, I was, I went to Goa and went to the spice, was it the spice farm or spice plantation or something like that. I don't know. But you go there, and they take you on this tour of all the different spices. You know, what a cinnamon tree looks like and blah, blah, blah. But then he asks you questions that what is India known for? And it was black pepper. 

[00:08:00] [00:08:00] Abdulla: [00:08:00] Oh really? 

[00:08:01] Nyra: [00:08:01] It was people and I asked this question on Facebook and everybody kept saying Curry. I was like, yeah, well, that's what we think. We know India for but its pepper. Can you imagine? 

[00:08:12] Abdulla: [00:08:12] Interesting because you see everything there. It's, it's they are so blessed with such good land. They can plant anything they want. 

[00:08:20] Nyra: [00:08:20] They sure can. 

[00:08:22]Abdulla: [00:08:22] Banana trees, endless, endless land of banana trees, mango trees, and so fresh and tasty.

[00:08:30] Nyra: [00:08:30] I like the Mango, like they had, like, I had like the stringy. Mangoes, you know, that's like biggest all gets caught up in stuff. No, it's like when you bite in, it's like this very whole and attached fruit, but it's so sweet. 

[00:08:47] Abdulla: [00:08:47] Did you ever, did you ever get the experience of being served in a banana leaf?

[00:08:59] Nyra: [00:08:59] I'm so happy. You are the third person i interviewed. And I do think you're interesting. I just think your journey is interesting and you're a young guy and you've just got more time, more and more. If I may ask. How old are you now? 

[00:09:22] Francesca: [00:09:22] I'm 33 years old. I just turned 33, three months ago. 

[00:09:24] Nyra: [00:09:24] Yes, the baby. 

[00:09:26] Abdulla: [00:09:26] I know, you must have thought 38 or something by the way I speak, but yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, it's kind of funny because when I was a kid, people thought that I was at least 10 years older than I am. So I always got away with certain things like going to certain movies or going to certain places. And it was fine. It always worked right. I remember even first year in university you know; I think I was just the month before turning 18 or something like that. And there was a rule about being 18 to buy cigarettes.

[00:10:00] [00:10:00] And someone had stopped me outside the group, convenience store in university convenience store and asked me if I can buy them one. So it always kind of helped me 

[00:10:11] Nyra: [00:10:11] nice 

[00:10:12] Abdulla: [00:10:12] I always took the adventure road. 

[00:10:16] Nyra: [00:10:16] Age is kind of like this funny thing, like, you know People, all people look to see or get a gauge of what you, how old you are to make a determine, or make a decision, how they're going to talk to you and treat you and approach you. And I've had, you know, a mix experience around that. I don't know if you have 

[00:10:39] Abdulla: [00:10:39] yes, yes, yes, absolutely. I mean, people. They wait for two things. The moment they see you, that's the first impression, the moment you open up your mouth, the second impression, and it's usually the first impression, there'll be a, there'll be two kinds either. They'll judge you quickly and take advantage of it or, you know, send somebody else or stay away from you for a little while just to feel you out. So, you know, you don't like one of the main criticisms that I face is I'm not that approachable. Until I opened up my mouth, the moment people see me, they don't think they can approach me. They do. They're worried. They're anxious. 

[00:11:20] Nyra: [00:11:20] How did we meet> Was that a function? 

[00:11:25] Abdulla: [00:11:25] I think it was the woman's that film intelligent in UAE. Wasn't it? Or a festival? 

[00:11:30] Nyra: [00:11:30] Maybe it was, I just know it was yeah, it was probably one of those functions and we just started talking, I think it was on the couch and it was like somebody else there was like a group conversation, right.

[00:11:40] Abdulla: [00:11:40] Yeah. Yeah. I think it so early being back my days when I became back to UAE

[00:11:48] Nyra: [00:11:48] it was nice there? 

[00:11:50] Abdulla: [00:11:50] Yes. 

[00:11:54] Nyra: [00:11:54] we were trio? Or four? Dabs.[word not clear]

[00:12:03] [00:12:00] I had some friends that work, you know, just, you know, just act, but like the old fogy in the group, you know, it was like, God, these fellows they're so young, you don't like, but that's like, 

[00:12:18] Abdulla: [00:12:18] you want to explore. You just came from the U S weren't you in the us before, 

[00:12:24] Nyra: [00:12:24] UAE was my first experience.

[00:12:26] Abdulla: [00:12:26] First experience, right. We felt a responsibility to take care of you. You went to China? 

[00:12:37] Nyra: [00:12:37] Yeah. Well, believe me, it wasn't your fault. It was just time. I was just like, I needed a new experience, but you know what. I learned so much in that six years. And I made so many great connections with people. And I still engaged. Obviously, if I can just text you and say, Hey, look, you know, let's have, I'd love to be there in person.

[00:13:02]Abdulla: [00:13:02] But now with, with everything used to be that if I live, if you live somewhere, cause you know, I lived in multiple places around the world. So. You know, it used to be that if I leave a certain place and go somewhere else, that's it. You say goodbye, you cry, you cry, you call your tears and you shut your three tears and then you move on, you move online. And by the time you get to see that person again, you're probably 20 years, 15 years, 10 years into it. Now I know I speak to my friend in Paris and then after that I hang up and then I speak to my friend in New York or in, in Egypt. And. We're just little less worried about traveling, more worried about connecting.

[00:13:42] Nyra: [00:13:42] Right, right, right. Exactly. Exactly. And so this is my, this is like my service to my, my little community on, on Facebook and, you know, and I'm going to post this up on YouTube, but to say, Hey look, you know, [00:14:00] Your, your, your circle could be so it's so much larger than just arm’s length or even community distance. Right? So you know, this, all these interesting people all over the planet, and they're looking for you to connect with them. You're interesting. They're interesting, too interesting. People need to come together. You know what I'm saying? And even if you think you're not interesting, you know, because you're intermingling, it's like that spice that you blend with another spice that you didn't know how it was going to go.

[00:14:30] And then you go. Holy crap. This is like the new shit. You know what I'm saying? My tastes bud is like exploding, you know. Yeah. That's it. Right. So we're all these different spices, you know, looking to find, you know, some new creations, you know, I take everything comes back to food with me, so just know we might have some more food references when this is all over 

[00:14:53] I tell you food is half the trouble for me.

[00:14:55] Hey. Hey. Hey. Talk about it. Talk about it. First of all, you said you lived in several different places, break down where you've lived and then tell me, and then we can get into the foodie stuff. 

[00:15:11] Abdulla: [00:15:11] Okay. Well, I traveled because I've been to, UAE I've been to I lived in Egypt for a while. I lived in Canada for a while and I was born and raised in UAE. So natively from Yemen. My parents are Yemen, but I was born and raised in UAE. That's where I spent most of my life and I pursued education Egypt during high school. And then later for university in Canada and afterwards, I decided to come back to Abu Dhabi and that's where I am right now. Yeah, but I mean, look, you know, each country, each in Egypt, I've lived in Cairo , Giza.

[00:15:51]And in Canada all over the place. Such a big country.

[00:15:57] Nyra: [00:15:57] Okay, go ahead. Giza [00:16:00] is just But 

[00:16:05] Abdulla: [00:16:05] you can have little what do you call them? Emojis? Japanese show you don't want to sound like the left tracks and the sound effects. 

[00:16:19] Nyra: [00:16:19] No, we're not going there now. We're going to keep it very organic, very organic with all the screw ups and everything. So keep it, just keep it real. So, so like, I would have asked you this later, but I'm going to ask you now. Why do you travel? Why travel, why? 

[00:16:46] Abdulla: [00:16:46] It started as seeking education. That's what it started as, but it'd be honest right after it came out right after I came back to UAE, it became about, about connecting with the people around me. So I looked at the guy who lifts the gate open and the parking lot at work. And I walk to say hi to him for the past two, three years.

[00:17:07] And I don't know who he is. What's his name, where he's from? And I asked him, where are you from? He said, Nepal, actually, actually the moment, the day that I asked him, he quit your job, his job. Ah, so I said, one day, maybe I'll visit you in Nepal. And I did. And that's how it started is that, and I loved it. I love that you welcome me Nepal. We went through everything there showed me everything. And I, I love the fact that now I understand so much about their culture and about who are these people around me. What makes them, who they are, because, you know, UAE is such a melting pot for everyone.

[00:17:50] I can't say in all honesty that I know anything about, everyone else I grew up in such a close circle that I know the people that I've grown, you know, the cultures that I was surrounded by [00:18:00] were probably Iran, Egyptian. And of course, UAE culture. That's pretty much it. What we’re talking about at least 170 more that I have zero knowledge off there. Here I have zero knowledge and you know; my next ones should be somewhere more in Asia. I want to continue exploring Africa just for that reason. know, who are surrounding me. Cause then you start, you start not only learning. Learning how to know they live their lives, but it humbles you a lot more.

[00:18:34] It makes you more of a decent human to know what went through this person to get to this position or to get to this place and to fight this fight for his family back home, whatever. And what can you do to help them? Or if anything. Just make the life a little less, happy, less, more happier. So, so that's what it is. Just maybe, maybe, maybe spread joy. Spin. Are you happy? Are you happy now? 

[00:19:06] Nyra: [00:19:06] I am happy. There are some moments where even when I'm feeling down. But if I think about it, it's like I'm alive. Right. And I have, I have my limbs are I get, I, I tap into what I need to be grateful for, which are the fundamental things, you know, I'm not what I've produced. But I do feel it's not the source of my happiness. Like, you know, the fact that I still get to try every day to Get my vision out on a certain thing, or, you know, just to pursue something, you know, somebody today didn't get that chance today was their last day for whatever. However, that looks like, you know, and I don't have that.

[00:19:53] That has not happened to me. That's I need to be happy and grateful for that. So gratitude and happiness kind of go together. [00:20:00] I want it to say something about what you just said, which I think is very important. And I want to make sure that I highlight this is that you said the guy that was working at the gate some gate right? 

[00:20:14] Okay. So how many of us in life ever get curious about what is considered somebody who's in a position that is deep? Like who gives a shit? You know what I'm saying? But, but. You know what I'm saying? Like that says something about you, but then in another country, put in a context in another country, when you have all these different cultures blending and you go that somebody has something to offer, you know what I'm saying? No matter what position they're in and you made, you made an intentional choice to go to this person and connect with them and say, Hey, where are you from? I don't know anything about Nepal. I'm coming to see you. Yeah. Like I went to [word not clear]in China and the girl was not from there she’s from Mongolia.

[00:21:03] I said, oh shit, I'm coming to see you. You know what I'm saying? You from, you she called me for marriage, oh my gosh, I didn't get to go. I didn't go to her wedding, you know, because of the timing, but Mongolia on the list, you know what I'm saying? For sure. And so that kind of, you know, Just being curious about somebody else.

[00:21:20] Here's what I want to take. Cause I'm sure you've had so many different cultural connections that you've made just by stepping out there. How has it affected your work, your life? Like how does it move in? Like give me an example. I want like a tangible example. Cause I think lots of people don't know just how it happens.

[00:21:42] Abdulla: [00:21:42] You know how many people are probably going through shit days and say nothing. It's a lot, it's a lot, especially this year, but even normal days, it's a lot. And just a simple word [00:22:00] of hello. And they're in their language kind of shifts the world around. It makes them feel safe, familiar. And, you know, it makes them happier. It makes them willing to give you more or be happy for you or try to seek to be to reciprocate that, that, that, that, that exchange. Now I'm not saying go use it, take it to your advantage or anything like that. I'm not saying that all i am saying is it it's one more person outside your circle.

[00:22:32] Who's giving you a perspective. So next time when I'm dealing, let's say with somebody from that same culture, but in a different position, and he's arguing against me on a certain deal or a certain work requirement. I know exactly where he comes from. It increases my chance of reaching some, somewhere in the middle where we're both happy, where we both have an understanding where we both can deliver what we want, but it's communication. It's just communication. And a lot of times we don't know how to communicate people. I can remember a certain nationality every time I speak to them, they tell me you're a liar.

[00:23:13] Why would I lie? Why would I tell you a lie? Why I'm being dead serious? They'll tell me i am a liar. They don't believe my tone. They anyone, because that's in their culture. That's their culture. If someone speaks that way or certain, certain methods and their style of talking, or it means they're hiding something or it means they're there, or they're being a little shifty there and I give them that impression, but that's how I speak. That's how I train myself. And it seems to work fine with most people, but it's just, it peculiar with that specific side of the world. They, there. All right now, [word not clear]

[00:23:57] Nyra: [00:23:57] for those who are listening or [00:24:00] hearing that term for the first time, Levant, L E V a N T. Explain what, what Levant is. 

[00:24:07] Abdulla: [00:24:07] Levant are the countries that are Northern middle East. So Jordan Jordan, Palestine, Syria, Lebanon 

[00:24:19] Nyra: [00:24:19] yeah. And it's funny. I didn't even know that span across those four countries. I just knew I just associate Levant with Lebanon. Right. You know, now describe the group because this group of people have, are, are regarded as a certain specific group, you know, or they have certain attributes and they have certain characteristics that are considered almost desirable, you know, but I'd laughed about the lying part because, and I don't want to seem offensive, but you know, Lebanese caught up as liars. And I just thought that chuckle, that was like,

[00:25:09] Abdulla: [00:25:09] I give you that they're straight shooters. 

[00:25:11] Nyra: [00:25:11] Yeah. Yeah. Well, Hey. 

[00:25:14] Abdulla: [00:25:14] Yeah, they go straight up to the point, which is, which is something you gotta admire. Yeah. 

[00:25:19] Nyra: [00:25:19] Yeah. I love shooting from the hip. I'm the advocate for that for sure. Yeah. Yeah. 

[00:25:25] Abdulla: [00:25:25] They're yeah, they get to the bottom of it. And what else to say? It's actually one of the parts of the middle East that I would like to say that I've interacted enough with, but not really. Because the last that it, you got to remember that, or I would said it to you before, but I lived in UAE up until a certain age and I left at a very young age. So once I left and I went to Egypt, it's not like the UAE where you find many nationalities, it's mostly Egyptians.

[00:25:55] And even if you've seen non-Egyptians, they were originally Egyptian, or they had an Egyptian mother or had [00:26:00] Egyptian dad at some point. All right. And that's why they're in Egypt. So and even when I say Canada, Canada is multicultural for sure. But then everyone has this there are Sweden[word not clear]Canadian culture or Canadian norm.

[00:26:13] So it's really in UAE where do you find those multicultural segments in the society, but they haven't mixed. They're still their own, they're still their own identity. They're still how you would find it back home. Right. And, you know, as, as the country kind of  evolves, you're going to see the mix a little bit more and they have started to, we can see it now, more in society what I've done with that story, with that and I've done it also with somebody from Tanzania and someone from China. So I just say, I'm going to be there in your country if I say those words count on it 

[00:26:46] Nyra: [00:26:46] count on it. I love that. I love that. So. I'm going to ask you first of all, what does expat mean to you? A lot of people don't know what, what is it what do you think is the definition of an expat? If you were to give it a definition, what do you think the definition of an ex-pat is 

[00:27:05] Abdulla: [00:27:05] someone away from home? For various social economic. Political reasons that would be my best guess. 

[00:27:15] Yeah. But it's temporary and it's, and it's a characteristic it's temporary. So it's not supposed to be, it's not a lifelong do achieve lifelong plan. It's I don't know if it's also exploring other cultures. It's not really about that. I don't think so. It's not about integration. I think it's more just about serving a certain purpose, very specific purpose in your life and somewhere else, not here.

[00:27:47] Nyra: [00:27:47] Hm that's that's powerful. Yeah. Serving a purpose in your life somewhere else. I love that. That's a good definition. Really is. Because I think [00:28:00] oftentimes, you know, some people come and go to other countries, not with that in mind, they're looking to take and not really seeking to contribute. Right. Although sometimes that's what ends up happening, ends up happening because that's the only way you can be, there is you have to contribute, you know? And so but I think what they, the takeaway is that. Much much, much is required too much is given much is required. Right? You ever heard that statement?

[00:28:34] That saying, Oh yeah, too much, too much is given much is required. You know, so to all the good life, the good life say much it's required of you and , you know, and I think for ex-pat life what's required is that you, you know, you are there you're required person. You're there to contribute. And you have to actively be thinking along those lines, contribution and contribution in a way that kind of brings all of us together.

[00:29:03] Abdulla: [00:29:03] Yeah. you know. Countries are actually starting to evolve, to accept that reality is that, you know, those talents you get, they're already there in your land. They know who they are, you know who they are. They're, they're already contributing to that society. So a lot of countries are now presenting those opportunities for them to stay longer. And that's changing, changing then, you know, say 10 years or 20 years ago when ex-pat just meant literally temporary worker, that's it. 

[00:29:36] Nyra: [00:29:36] Right, right. It's temporary. And just short-term and I would even challenge the idea of home because I've also don't you, would you say that home is where you decide home to be. You know, you think your, where you were born is where you kind of consider that home. And what is 

[00:29:58] Abdulla: [00:29:58] that I stay home is [00:30:00] where you feel most familiar in the most comfortable. So, you know Yemeni by, by region. But I wasn't born there. I wasn't raised there. I don't know anyone there. I was born into the UAE, so I consider home to be Abudhabi the UAE? Canada is verging on that. Because I stayed there for a long time or I lived there in for a long time. But UAE definitely more just because of I've been here for a long, long time. I understand the society, the way it functions and the way I can help it. And the way it can help me and not just me, many others.

[00:30:32] So and, and also in a world where people are, are mixed now. So you find Haitian dad with an Egyptian or those friends are telling me I am 4% Polish, 2%, whatever. And 3% I'm like, okay. And they're so serious about it. Right. And I think, I think the word home is very convoluted. If you take it in its literal sense. But if you take it in its meaningful sense, you can, you can say just home is where you're most familiar with.

[00:31:10]It makes a lot of definitions, easy. Cause if, if you're familiar with it, then you know it better than anywhere else. Right. You belong to it and it belongs to you.

[00:31:21]Nyra: [00:31:21] It belongs to you. I love it. 

[00:31:24] Abdulla: [00:31:24] You got all the right answers. It's coming from personal experience.