Laugh Until We Fart
Laugh Until We Fart
Season 4 Finale Christmas Special
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Christmas Banter and Gift Exchange
Speaker 1You better believe, so let's get it poppin'.
Speaker 2No more talk Gonna make us laugh until we fartin' Shane August, that's who we want Gonna make us laugh until we fart Shane.
Speaker 3August, that's who we want. Gonna make us laugh until we fart.
Speaker 4To the window, to the wall, till the sweat drops down my balls, until all these bitches crawl. Ah, skeet, skeet, goddamn, gettin' crunk in the club she's workin' I'd like to see them, females, twerking, taking my clothes off, bucking naked. Atl, ho, don't disrespect it. Three, six, nine.
Speaker 8Damn, you're fine.
Speaker 4Hoping she can suck it to me one more time. Bring your ass right over here, ho, and let me see you get low To the window, to the wall, to the sweat drops down my balls, my balls, oh, by golly, skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet, motherfucker.
Speaker 8Goddamn Son of a bitch. To the window, to the wall, oh, there's children. Till the sweat drops down and falls, until all the puppies crawl. Ah, sweet, sweet, gosh, darn, gosh, darn. Is that from Kidz Bop? No, that's from Kidz Bop I like to see them females twerking. Oh my lord.
Speaker 4Taking their clothes off, bucked and naked. Atl ho, don't disrespect it. Oh my Lord, should have played this during Dirty Santa last time. No kidding.
Speaker 6Okay, just this one.
Speaker 4Dirty Santa, see you get low to the window to the wall, Till the sweat drops down my bone. Oh my golly, I'll carol this song Motherfucker God damn.
Speaker 1This is America, you dumb son of a bitch.
Speaker 3Music sheets to this song.
Speaker 8Oh skeet, skeet, oh skeet skeet.
Speaker 2God damn Merry, merry skeet, skeet oh skeet skeet, god damn. Merry, merry Christmas. Ho, ho, ho, ho ho ho, from all of us in Studio, toot and Scoot, you have El Crapitan.
Speaker 9Coming from the North Pole.
Speaker 2You have the born-again virgin slutty co host Taylor Lee In the house. Casey Sue off camera. Hello, and Han Bun. Honey buddy that's joining us on this wonderful season finale episode. Oh, how special.
Speaker 2That is releasing on Christmas Day, so you're welcome audience for the present. So listen to this. If you're already started it and the kids are awake, sorry, you need to kick them out of the room, put them in bed. They need to play with all the fucking new toys or whatever they got. No, let them listen, let them listen, let the boy watch.
Speaker 9That needs to be a sound clip On the board. On the board, let the boy watch.
Speaker 2Oh, I got another opener video for us a sound clip on the board, on the board, let the boy watch. Oh, I got another opener video for us.
Speaker 9Oh boy oh yeah, this one's good, do you see, sawyer? Is that when he's off the side and he's like Mother is going to flip?
Speaker 12Yes, oh my goodness, I can't wait to give this to her Taylor's eyes light up. I was able to find her absolute tap-natch favorite fragrance. Tap-natch An elegance. Oh body man, my body fantasies.
Speaker 6Body fantasy.
Speaker 12Then, secondly, geez, talk about lightning striking twice. I was able to find these Dr Scholl's and Sarah's, and you know she's been wanting this for a long time. This is uh, with the you know, extra arch support and heel cushion as well, and so I'm over the moon over it. I'm at checkout and the young lady who's checking me out, uh, she might not be the only one his teeth glued together.
Speaker 12They're wired chunks. That says I got five extra cbs bucks on it and so with that I was able to get mother a brand new pumice stone. So mother's gonna be very happy, so it's gonna be a good Christmas.
Speaker 3Blessings, blessings it's a spring holiday, cheer he's the best he's actually a comedian and I think he's from Oklahoma.
Speaker 2Is he really I comedian and I think he's from oklahoma, is he really? I think so. Oh, I didn't get that.
Speaker 9I think so, I'm not positive, but I thought he was. I like all of his.
Speaker 3I like all of his characters man's has a calendar, he has a calendar calendar steven stevens. He's unrelated to him. Real name steven stevens. Chris munches, chris munch. That's why he changed it to Steven Stevens.
Speaker 2But I also have a special video that our friends Cam and Melinda sent in the old Ripper Ranch video. Oh boy Ripper Ranch. So let me fire it up real quick.
Speaker 9Fire it up. Fire it up Fire it up.
Speaker 2They got a chicken laying in the egg. You know they saved them from the tornadoes Out of a cloaca. Yeah.
Speaker 9Get it out One good push. Oh my god, gaping.
Speaker 8Gotcha.
Speaker 2That is dirty. You know what I forgot? I forgot to.
Speaker 6We gotta watch it again because I had it on the wrong, we don't have to watch it again.
Speaker 3Video something else gonna happen this time.
Speaker 2No, no no, I just want uh the audience to be able to see it. They got to see this goodness right here and we have to watch it twice. Laying an egg.
Speaker 6Why do I feel like I see Daniel?
Speaker 3doing something like that.
Dirty Santa Drama and Bathroom Banter
Speaker 13Why do you put a whole egg in your mouth like that? That's gross. I wonder if it was hard-boiled Because that came out of a cloaca.
Speaker 3I don't like how he did it well.
Speaker 10He practiced.
Speaker 3That couldn't have happened the first time.
Speaker 2At he practiced. That couldn't have happened the first time. Yeah, at the beginning you're like, okay, this could be a chicken. I've never seen a chicken laying.
Speaker 5I've seen a chicken's cloaca.
Speaker 3What's that?
Speaker 9It's the hole that it has.
Speaker 3Oh, they do have one. Huh, it's just one hole All the business. All the business One line.
Speaker 8One lane, and then we eat them up. All the business A piece of poop shouldn't have eggs come out. All the business One line. Peas poops, eggs. One line, it's one line, and then we eat them up.
Speaker 2I don't know why, but we don't eat the shell though. Hopefully not I don't know, do people?
Speaker 8People probably do. They're fucking weird Like chips.
Speaker 2Or like toenails, they bake them Mouthful of Voyage. Who ate toenails? Some characters in a story I wrote.
Speaker 9That's gross.
Speaker 3That was a fever dream. Just a little snack.
Speaker 2Well let's just play future-wise, because this is not recorded on Christmas. What did everybody get for Christmas? Oh, I got a TV. Oh yeah, you already did get some gifts 55-inch, not recorded on Christmas. What did everybody get for Christmas?
Speaker 8Oh, I got a TV. Yeah, oh yeah, you already did get some gifts 55 inch 55?
Speaker 9Whoa that's pretty big All right, I'll have BJ your anal pillow. Swibbity-wo 55. Wow, what? What? Definitely do those in a very specific order? Oh man, if that.
Speaker 2Hey, hey, you know what Casey's going to be getting quite a few TVs.
Speaker 3For anal, whatever, whatever man, whatever happens. High price to pay for both parties, for both parties.
Speaker 2It does, it, does, it does I mean they're not going to be great TVs. Jordan's not getting any new TVs no, we're good. No, anal, we're good.
Speaker 3No.
Speaker 6TVs. I's not getting any new TVs. No, we're good, no anal.
Speaker 3We're good. No TVs. I don't think either party is interested in new TVs or anal.
Speaker 9I was excited about the TV. I think we're both agreeing on that. Okay, what'd you ask for?
Speaker 3From Santa, anything that he thinks I deserve, which was a 23 Tacoma.
Speaker 2That's what he got for Christmas big boy bought himself a truck that's my. Christmas present that works out, because we haven't gone Christmas shopping yet, so it works out now. Well, you got a truck happy Christmas.
Speaker 9I'm glad we did Dirty Santa early because I got a sack of shit to give out to people, oh yeah.
Speaker 10Jordan was so fucking upset oh, no, I can, oh, because I stole hers no, because she was trying to scheme, and I don't like to scheme oh, what were you?
Speaker 9what were you trying to scheme for?
Speaker 3no, I didn't know it was happening. All I talked about in the past was how I liked the gift. Because I did the, that was my gift what the?
Speaker 3bust a nut and the, the mug and the car I I created, that I felt good about it I made that gift bag and I was like I feel like this is probably gonna be one of the fucking best ones. It's a good one. And so I guess in her mind she was like, and I should have magically known this, yeah, uh, I know I am wrong. Uh, she had whispered to me while we're there and she was like I'm going to take the gift and you can steal it.
Speaker 10Oh, to lock it down.
Speaker 3I don't know, I was like I don't like that. I was like I literally got this because I want someone to have it.
Speaker 12Aw.
Speaker 3I was like I don't think that's weird. I was like I like my family.
Speaker 10I like Dirty Santa.
Speaker 3And I wanted to actually see it be fought over. That's what I wanted to see. And then Jordan just fucking took it, and then I didn't take it, and then she vividly hated me for the rest of the night. Vividly hated you. Vividly and very blatantly. And I was, I don't know, and she's still mad about it Did.
Speaker 9She want the vape.
Speaker 3No, she wanted me to fucking steal it I know but why?
Speaker 9Because she knew that you were proud of it.
Speaker 3Yeah, she thought, when I was talking about how much I liked it, that she thought I wanted it. And so when she whispered to me right then. And there she was like I want to take it, she can steal it. I didn't give a fuck if I got a shitty gift or not. I would have taken a sack of shit. It's Dirty Santa who cares.
Speaker 9I hope you're excited about your stocking. Yeah, sack of shit.
Speaker 3I'll eat some of that stuff. I'll try it. I'll check it out.
Speaker 2Marzipan, should I get it, and we all have to try the mars pan no, hell no what is hungover man?
Speaker 9I have no idea. I thought it was a drug. He's on marsupane.
Speaker 3Oh, he od'd on that marsupane it does sound like a like big pharma company yeah, it definitely sounds like a medication yeah, yeah what kind, what?
Speaker 9what ailment would marsupane as a pharmaceutical be for?
Speaker 3something, something with butts.
Speaker 9Yeah, definitely like hemorrhoidal cream. I feel like you're a nervous. Nancy you know. So you take marzipan, marzipan and it like calms you down.
Speaker 3So it's just Xanax. That's what I was about to say and that name sounds I think it's like a morning, after pill, just take a Mars pan, chill out. Yeah, take a Mars pan, take a Mars dude.
Speaker 9Chill out. Take a Mars bar. Yeah, I did get one of those, though A Mars bar.
Speaker 3And he kept saying I am excited about that and he was freaking me out about it. He kept saying he was like those are real.
Speaker 2Real you mean, they're real so the mars bars from europe are more like a three musketeers than what a mars bar is if you bought one in the states there's normal, I think it's denser.
Speaker 3He hit a world market and just bought a bunch of weird shit world market, yeah, world market genuine. What did you?
Speaker 12end up with.
Speaker 3I ended up with the fucking pasties.
Speaker 8I didn't borrow those and the shooters.
Speaker 9Courtney brought those. Yeah, she put them in.
Speaker 3That was Courtney's gift. Three shooters and fucking nitpads.
Speaker 14What's a shooter?
Speaker 10The shooters, the little shots.
Speaker 3And so yeah, obviously it, it was like anybody who wants these please? Take them I wanted them I'm not gonna fucking use them, so I put them on the table I don't know who ended up taking them.
Speaker 13I don't even know you were pretty fucking drunk, I don't even know where our gifts are.
Speaker 3I remember, I think they're in his truck I remember when I was leaving, you were still. I felt like you'd been on the massage chair for like three fucking hours and, as I was leaving, I can't remember what you said to me, but, legitimately, I've never heard you talk like that.
Speaker 10I have, I might. I'm just saying no, you were full on.
Speaker 3You were full on Slurring, drunk slur talk and I just remember being like.
Speaker 10Did you throw up?
Speaker 12No and I told him the way to get home. Mary, do your happy.
Speaker 10Chrysler, Happy Chrysler. I told him how to get home and I don't even remember driving home, but he was like you gave me perfect directions home.
Speaker 3You know your way drunk or not, I do. Jordan was convinced I was going to throw up when I got home she didn't want me going to bed.
Speaker 6I didn't throw up.
Speaker 3Because it has happened a couple times and I go throw up. Yeah Well, yeah, I don't like that, but that didn't happen this time.
Speaker 9Well, because the only place that the room doesn't spin when you're drunk is the bathroom. Yeah, the bedroom spins worse than anywhere else. Yeah, you have to go to the bathroom.
Speaker 3I'm going to have to full on disagree with that.
Speaker 9Oh no, Then you've never been in a good bathroom. I've been high on drugs and not drunk off of alcohol, so I don't know. But the bathroom is a tavern of matrix entry.
Speaker 3It is not matrix it's not good. It's not good why, I don't know, you get in a bathroom and it's just a isolated area to freak the fuck out oh no, I love the bathroom if I'm too drunk because it's cold in there, like the tile is cold. I mean I've had some, some nights just donutting around the toilet, just some you just you, just lay across you just lay with it. You snuggle with the bottom of the toilet yeah and then every once in a while.
Speaker 2Yeah, if you had a bidet you could wash your mouth out that's disgusting why it's just water. I have a butthole, so close.
Speaker 3Well, I have a theory in my head that no matter what kind of bidet it is, it's getting shit splattered back onto it 100% If you don't clean it.
Speaker 9Peek-a-matter.
Speaker 3I know when you guys are cleaning bidets, I clean it.
Speaker 9Every time we clean the toilet, we scrub that thing down.
Speaker 3Shout out to you, shout out to.
Speaker 9Peek-a-matter.
Speaker 2Nostal wash.
Speaker 3What are you telling me you would go drink water out of?
Speaker 13your bidet.
Speaker 3Just take a little.
Speaker 13Only if you had to.
Speaker 3Only if.
Speaker 13I had to.
Speaker 3Yeah, but you would.
Speaker 13Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't no matter how many times you cleaned it.
Speaker 9I saw your peas all over my toilet. I'm not Teach that boy how to piss I don't have a wiener Put Cheerios in there, Help me yeah that.
Speaker 3I don't know why they immediately kind of irritated me. I'm like somebody get this boy to piss right, come on. If he was ever in my house and pissed on the toilet, I'd be like bro, come here, we're going to go piss together.
Speaker 9Pee in the toilet, hold it.
Speaker 3Well, first First trick I don't know. What do you say? I don't know.
Speaker 2First thing you tell him to do is, when he's about to pee, spread the dick lips.
Speaker 3Ew, he doesn't have to fucking do that yet. Do that yet.
Speaker 2Yeah, he does.
Speaker 3I don't know. I could have gotten misinformation about that.
Speaker 2Why are y'all spreading your dick?
Speaker 3lips.
Speaker 2Because those little, the little pee pee hole.
Speaker 3That's what creates From sweating and everything.
Speaker 2A side spray Can stick together, and so if you don't do a pre empt, of strike and spread the dick lips.
Speaker 10Do you spread your vagina?
Speaker 9lips.
Speaker 2You'll do this.
Speaker 9I pee just fine without spreading my urethra, me too.
Speaker 2That's where you get the 90 degree turn, and then it's he's trying to over correct and then it's just a super soaker everywhere.
Speaker 3Maybe he's getting, maybe he's starting to getcorrect and then it's just a super soaker everywhere. Maybe he's starting to get little kid boners. Now Don't say that. Of course he is. He can't handle it. He can't figure out what to do with it. Of course he is.
Speaker 2How old is he? Ten.
Speaker 3Yeah, he is. He's going to start pissing on the shower curtain at some point.
Speaker 2Shower curtain. That's the first thing. I first thing it could go anywhere. And then what I do is because, no matter how much you wiggle and dance, the last two drops always go in your pants, and so I do all that. But then I take a couple of pieces of toilet paper dab your dick and I dab the tip I have always, always and maybe have.
Speaker 3Uh, maybe we got a peepee problem, but I've always just hit it with a little bit of TP after a pee pee, obviously not when I'm at work sometimes I'll trick.
Speaker 2The dick is what I call it trick the dick.
Speaker 9I've literally never heard you say that. Well cause, I don't tell you about it?
Speaker 2hey, honey, I'm tricking it and then I act like I'm putting my wiener away and then pull it right back out. A few more drops come out.
Speaker 6Trick the dick.
Speaker 2So that's what he needs to be taught To trick the dick.
Speaker 3Hey, buddy, you're 10, now you gotta start tricking this thing.
Speaker 2Spread the dick lips and then do the dick trick.
Speaker 9And I think it makes sense for dudes to at least dab off after they pee. Because girls have to wipe after they pee. It's the same thing that's happening.
Speaker 3Well, yeah, because a guy that pees and he doesn't wipe, you're just laying it in a little layer of pee-pee again it's gross. It's gross. I'm a neat freak, though. That genuinely does gross me.
Speaker 6I mean you get.
Speaker 2You get weirded out when you put your wiener back in and you get a good little dribble going in. You're like oh, I peed rub it around.
Speaker 3Rub it around that might show through.
Speaker 2I better like dry it off rub it. Oh yeah, that's what you like, that they have the air blower, hand dryers so you can funnel and dry that off.
Speaker 13I didn't know having a wiener was so complicated.
Bathroom Etiquette and Music Preferences
Speaker 2What I hate are those Dyson blade hand things.
Speaker 9Oh, yeah, right.
Speaker 2In some bathrooms.
Speaker 3It's the Dyson ones they might be, gross, gross, but I feel like they work really well yeah, but like there was a study done, how much spread the? It just goes everywhere.
Speaker 2It just spreads piss and shit particles everywhere and so one day I'm using one and I'm like putting my hands.
Speaker 3That's putting your dick in and out of it. You're was dry and not done.
Speaker 2No, I didn't have to do it that time. But I was doing this, and it's blowing so hard that water came back and hit my face.
Speaker 9You got pink eye. Ew Peep-poop-poop-pee water on you. You just pee-peed in your own face.
Speaker 2And so I kicked it and ran out.
Speaker 3See. The thing about men, though, is that, no matter what you got, piss and fecal matter on the bottom of your shoes or your boots, that's just the way it works in a men's bathroom. I don't know about a women's bathroom.
Speaker 9Of course they do.
Speaker 3Women's bathrooms are gross, but I feel like I've heard that women's bathrooms are disgusting, and that's another weird.
Speaker 9Thing that freaks me the fuck out. Why are they so nasty?
Speaker 3It depends on like why are y'all so nasty? Girls are nasty in the bathroom. Just go in there and just fully, fully release 100.
Speaker 2I have video footage that we're gonna see.
Speaker 10I feel like some old like grams and place like that had the worst bathrooms. People just pee all over the floor because you're drunk it's so gross vomit and tampons yes, the tampons.
Speaker 9Tampons like literally everywhere. Why is that?
Speaker 3a thing too, though that and maybe this is just I'm too much of like a I don't know. I don't know why. Why would a woman flush a tampon?
Speaker 2you shouldn't, because it can stop up pipes well, no shit that's what I'm saying yeah is why why would anybody in their right mind even?
Speaker 6think that's okay.
Speaker 9It's like a kid flushing a toy down the toilet.
Speaker 3They don't want the blood to drip when they're putting it into the trash can, but you're in the woman's restroom. That should be normal.
Speaker 9It doesn't make it less gross For blood to be on the floor. You're grossed out about that, about blood on the floor.
Speaker 3It's pussy blood that all of you have.
Speaker 9Ew.
Speaker 3I don't enjoy my own pussy blood. I'm not saying it has to be enjoyed but like no, I'm grossed out what what are we having for dinner?
Speaker 13do you have a certain stall you always go to when you go to the bathroom? Yes, hell, yeah, I do.
Speaker 2I do too, the handicap one if it's open.
Speaker 10Yeah, I'm not going in the first stall. Never, because if somebody comes in, killed. I'm going to go to the first one Now sometimes that's how she's thinking Not comfortable Sometimes in a guy's bathroom.
Speaker 2I will go into the first stall Because typically, Typically, guys will go to the last stalls.
Speaker 10So if I'm in the last stall.
Speaker 2No doubt they're going to take the stall right next to me, so if I get the first one, they'll go a couple down you don't want to be right next door.
Speaker 9Yeah, I usually try to get the closest to the handicapped, if not the handicapped stall.
Speaker 3Are you conscientious about it? Yeah, you don't want to see somebody in a wheelchair rolling there.
Speaker 9They're like oh, oh yeah, like I don't want to be the asshole that like comes out of the handicapped stall to see someone in a wheelchair fucking waiting I'm waiting for that day.
Speaker 3Yeah, I want it to happen. So bad I just want to be shitting in there and just immediately walk out and be like sorry about it.
Speaker 2Someone someone was in the other one before couldn't hold it but yeah, I hold it, but yeah, I don't. I like the rhythm, I don't want a shit neighbor, and that also goes to like See, I love a shit neighbor. Well, if it's a brother or a son, that's fun, because you can.
Speaker 3Stranger is so much better.
Speaker 2But there's an unwritten rule when there's multiple urinals, you don't go right next to someone. Oh yeah, If there's other urinals it's weird, I can't stand it when a stranger, especially goes right next to you and then wants to try to fucking talk to you Amen and it's like, look, we both have our dicks in our hand. I don't want to conversate right now.
Speaker 9What if it's one of the like where the urinals have the dividers between, but it's not like a stall with a door?
Speaker 10Oh, your head's like a little divider.
Speaker 9Yeah.
Speaker 2You can still see them, but like you're not just, if they don't talk to me, it's okay, but there's a lot of guys that don't know. Are there the uh?
Speaker 8etiquette etiquette what?
Speaker 5do?
Speaker 8they say how's the weather?
Speaker 6yeah, yeah, I've got bad etiquette. You do you talk? I just like to, so how's your day going? You talk to people well because, it's.
Speaker 2It's a strange environment. It's funny if, like it's funny to me, someone was doing it kind of jokingly.
Speaker 3Oh, they don't know, but there's a lot of people that just like, so what'd? You think of the movie? Like I don't want to my favorite thing is, since I travel a lot for work, a lot of the gas stations we'd go to, you know, there's always like a fucking tractor supply newspaper, that's like framed above the urinal or like love and so yeah, yeah, loves will have their catalog, so it's just like trucker shit should.
Speaker 2I need a cd I always love.
Speaker 3I'll be that dude. I'll see somebody pissing right next to him and immediately gauge the goofiest thing on the catalog and be like fucking 39.99 for a Bluetooth headset bud. No, sean, I'd become an entirely different person when I enter the bathroom.
Speaker 2I would know someone was jokingly doing that if they did that, but that's not what they're doing to me. They're just like for real.
Speaker 3They want to talk to you about how goddamn hot it is outside. Maybe they think you're hot.
Speaker 9So in I feel like every gas station women's stall there's the sign in English and Spanish that basically says are you safe, are you in danger? Are you being held against your?
Speaker 6will.
Speaker 9It's like the human sex trafficking hotline Plus three times in a row if you're being trafficked, but do you guys have those in the men's bathroom?
Speaker 3I don't think so Well why would they I?
Speaker 10don't think so. Nobody still has them.
Speaker 3I'm trying to think of a fucked up joke of like if you're harboring somebody, turn it off.
Speaker 9It'd be. Hey, just so you know, your bitch has a number on her bathroom. Stall right now.
Speaker 3Yeah, you go into the men's bathroom and it's like your woman's in stall three, yeah, creepy, she flushed three times in a row. No, that's what's in men's bathrooms is just. If you're in a, like good example. If you're in a loves, it's just the fucking loves catalog. But what I find hilarious, it's framed. Yeah, it's in a glass, framed thing like they couldn't nail to the wall above
Speaker 6the urinal.
Speaker 3This is just what men want to look at when they're pissing.
Speaker 2You think you know what they do.
Speaker 9I do every time they give me something to look at they don't want them to get boners while they pee, because then that's unruly.
Speaker 2Then you get piss everywhere it's hard to pee with a boner. Did you say fit for a king?
Speaker 9yeah, fit for a king. Yeah, fit for a king, well, all right. Well, all right mean the one true king, jesus christ.
Speaker 2Happy birthday, jesus happy holidays I think I think I found dan's tiktok, our brother, dan I think I found a stick talking Lordy.
Speaker 9This is going to be awful. Do you think Daniel's autistic?
Speaker 7Yeah, Fucking ready, will, let's?
Speaker 6go buddy. I feel like a fucking uncircumcised.
Speaker 7It's so fucking cold, it's fucking free. Are you fucking ready? Stop the fucking music? Will Stop the fucking music? Rise and shine, you silly motherfuckers. Your attitude and your grit, not your intelligence, will determine how fucking far you go and fucking life.
Speaker 3Get off your fucking ass car salesman's are pieces of shit. That is that is absolutely dan's alarm clock every morning.
Speaker 2I think that, yeah, that's his alarm clock that morning.
Speaker 9I think that, yeah, that's his alarm clock. That's what he wakes up to.
Speaker 2If Dan was one of those public speakers, like motivational speaker that's his entry music.
Speaker 3That's him For sure, I just imagine, that's how he walks out of his office at work Just immediately.
Speaker 9You silly motherfucker I think that should be his music when he comes out of the office bathroom.
Speaker 2Some ACDC.
Speaker 9What if everybody had a song that played when they leave the bathroom? What would yours be? I don't know. It's raining man. Oh God, you coming Mine would be like Bulls on Parade.
Speaker 3That's pretty good. I like that one.
Speaker 2Mine would be Chocolate Rain. Let me think I don't know the title of the song, though. Seven Mary Three. They have a song about talking about down by the water. What is it called down by the?
Speaker 3give me a second water's edge. Water's edge water's edge down by the water's edge, hiding there by the shahoo dead. I'm holding back to not release that.
Speaker 2I'm lying. Why are you holding back? Because there's no need for me to fucking let her rip, dude. I'm surprised back to not release that tired smile on my face right now.
Speaker 3Why are you holding back? Fucking let her rip dude, I'm surprised. I didn't know that song when that shit is ingrained in my soul because of you.
Speaker 9That's on your. What Are they? Song From Dad playlist.
Speaker 2Because there's like a million of those in my head.
Speaker 3True, well then you need to add more to that playlist, because there's not a million songs on there.
Speaker 2That's true. Well, there's some songs that I listen to that you don't want to listen to. Like what. Like there's some 80s music one time we were driving in the car and it was like we built this city we built shit city on rock and roll it looks at me, it goes. Why do you listen to this? Get hard man Get hard and I said I said I don't know, it just makes me happy Like I don't know what it is.
Speaker 3It makes me happy. There's so many songs on playlists that you know it'll be going from heavy metal, and then, just all of a sudden, it's so, so, so kiss me and it just starts playing and I, and then just all of a sudden, it's so, so, so kiss me that just
Speaker 2starts playing and I'm like, yeah, six cents on the richard, I enjoy it. I enjoy it. Damn out to it. It does make me feel good.
Speaker 3That's why it just made me happy, just happy song it's just weird genres of rock from back in the day that I'm like, just like hair rock hair bands I'm just like how, at any point in time, were these dudes able to do what they did, like Like Motley Crue? Yeah, they're fucking stupid. Some of the worst music I've ever heard in my entire life.
Speaker 13It was just the time, and it was the time. It was the time.
Speaker 2It's just not good music. I just don't feel like it translates to the day. What about Death Leopard Pour some sugar on me.
Speaker 8No, it's so terrible.
Speaker 10I like Guns N'.
Speaker 3Roses too, I like Brett Michaels. I like to show. I like to show that's how I knew who he was.
Speaker 9Oh, god, rock of Love.
Speaker 6I'm a weirdo for some reality TV.
Speaker 3I do like trash TV because during that time it was Rock of Love and Flavor of Love.
Speaker 9That was my favorite, like trash tv, because during that trash tv.
Speaker 10During that time it was rock of love and flavor that was my favorite disgusting my.
Speaker 2What about near 90, john bovie?
Speaker 9shut up, don't talk about him. I hate him. He's the worst. Fucking. Hate that guy. You don't like bon john bovie. I don't like bon john bovie or his cousin john bon jovi oh fuck well it's like a.
Speaker 2Garth Brooks and a.
Speaker 9Chris Gaines type thing it's.
Speaker 2Jon Bon Jovi and then a Bon Jon Bovie.
Speaker 9I loved the Chris Gaines CD. You what I listened to it nonstop, probably the only one.
Speaker 6Is that Country or something?
Speaker 3No, it was Garth Brooks and his emo alter ego, oh my lord, chris Gaines is Garth Brooks and his emo alter ego. Oh my Lord, chris Gaines is Garth Brooks.
Speaker 9Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3Is Garth Brooks, the one who passed away recently.
Speaker 9No, that's Toby.
Speaker 3Keith, oh yeah.
Speaker 9Garth Brooks from UConn Oklahoma, and now he lives up in Claremore.
Speaker 5He went to Stillwater.
Speaker 3Does Chris Gaines still come around?
Speaker 6No, he disappeared they had Chris Gaines still come around? No, he disappeared. They had.
Speaker 9Chris Gaines, as a Chris Gaines is the one that murdered people, chris.
Speaker 5Gaines, we're the buddies, chris.
Speaker 2They had Chris Gaines as a musical guest on Saturday Night Live. Yeah, they did that.
Speaker 9They did, yeah, they had, because you know, like the musical guest will sing, will do two spots on Saturday Night Live.
Speaker 3One was Garth brooks, one was garth brooks and one was chris games in the wig and everything came out.
Speaker 9The wig, yes, the eyeliner I'm gonna have to youtube.
Speaker 3So I feel like I've seen pictures of that and I thought it was just like fake editing, no, and he it looks like. Yeah, I didn't think it was real.
Speaker 9I remember, like the whole thing about it, they said, was that, um, it was going to be like a character in a movie or something I don't know, and so he wrote the album for that character or something. So he was trying to live the part.
Speaker 2I mean, the Brinley wig looks better than that Chris Gaines wig, absolutely For sure.
Speaker 9But the music was really good. I really liked it. I loved that CD and it's not on Spotify.
Speaker 3You can only find it on YouTube.
Speaker 2That's how you know it's fucking bad.
Speaker 8Here's some news jurassic pet 3 breaking news is getting a theatrical release in taiwan in russia nice, we rented it, the kids- watched
Speaker 3it vladimir putin.
Speaker 9That's scary they watched it again. Yeah, they rented it.
Speaker 3What do the communists want with that?
Speaker 9Dinosaurs. They want to find out how the Americans found the dino portal.
Speaker 3They all just want to harvest the green suit screen.
Speaker 6I mean, if it gets me work.
Speaker 2If it gets me work, it gets me work. You know what I mean.
Speaker 9You do look like a comrade.
Speaker 8I do. I wish I could do that accent.
Speaker 2Mother Russia.
Speaker 5Yeah, you can't do Russian.
Speaker 2I can't do.
Speaker 7Russian, you can't do Russian.
Speaker 3It's just country Russian.
Speaker 9Comrade, comrade, comrade. Good job, comrade Comrade.
Speaker 3Comrade.
Speaker 2Good job. It's disgusting. Thank you. What'd you get for Christmas?
Speaker 9Back to that.
Speaker 2I'm just bringing it back around.
Speaker 10She got a pleather suit. That's right. That's right, a pleather.
Speaker 9Full pleather suit Jump chute, jump chute. Nope Full head to toe. Head to toe, leather full pleather, jump chute jump chute.
Speaker 6Nope, full pleather chute head to toe leather.
Speaker 3Leather ghillie suit, gimp suit ghillie suit fanny pack concealed carry holsters oh my god, I have to tell you this story.
Speaker 10This shit was wild whose name did you draw what?
Speaker 3no, I can't tell you this. Hey, let's talk about it. You almost got me.
Speaker 9I'm trying to sneak that in there, guys almost got me I tell people so bad so we went to I already forgot who I have we went to lunch the other day and we were at this place called madison's, which is like a home country cooking place, and there was a tall, skinny old man. He reminded me of the dancing old guy look that you like good on tiktok guy oh, what the silver hair?
Speaker 9yeah, silver hair dancer, guy like skinny, he like yeah, he's like he's got the hips that move when he tries to sing and it's not good joey bro that guy bro. So he looked like a really tall joey bro. Um, he was wearing starched jeans that were too big, a black tank top that was too small and tucked in a really fine belt and a six shooter on his hip cowboy style yeah, but it was like a it, so it was on his left hip, but it was facing the wrong way, so it would be a cross draw.
Speaker 9Yep, he looked badass amazing bad ash man I saw a video I saw a
Speaker 2video that joey bro did on his tiktok. You know he's always talking about. I mean, if you no, I don't know he talks about going to nashville and like doing meet and greets and he came out with a song.
Speaker 9Oh my God, Is it on Spotify?
Speaker 2If that's on Spotify and Chris Gaines isn't, I'll see if I can find it real quick.
Speaker 3You got to find it on SoundCloud.
Speaker 2He had a video of him in Nashville and I can't remember which. It was like one of the famous singers bars, but I can't remember which. It was like one of the famous singer's bars, but I can't remember who it was. And he's doing that stupid dancing to some song and no one knows who. He is Shocker. And so the comments were just blasting him like yeah, you talk about being famous and no one knows who you are.
Speaker 9It's just some old dude just busting a move busting a nut I think he's a hottie.
Speaker 13He probably got a few dms from some old single ladies, so he thinks he's old single ladies, old single ladies, so he thinks he's like you know, his tiktok lives are just full of them oh my god, it it's on Spotify.
Speaker 9No, yeah, but Chris Gaines isn't.
Speaker 3How long is this song? I won't play it. Well, no, I was just curious how long this song is.
Speaker 2Three minutes 13 seconds.
Speaker 3Wow, I don't know if it's going to be like a minute long or like seven minutes long.
Speaker 7Some guys fall for 12 point buff In the woods. I don't know if it's going to be like a minute long or like seven minutes long. That's all I'm going to play.
Speaker 9That needs to go on your twang and bang.
Speaker 3Yeah, I was already going to say, unfortunately that probably will go on one of my plays that's going on twang and bang and his.
Speaker 10Does it have a video, no his little cover to the single.
Speaker 2What does he have? Is him in a cut-off shirt holding a pair of nunchucks? Those are nunchucks, I couldn't tell Near his face.
Speaker 9I thought it was a clear net.
Speaker 3I thought it was too.
Speaker 9Yeah, I thought it was a clear net. Oh my.
Speaker 3God, there it is though. Nice.
Speaker 9Bassman, bassman, and he can, really, he can really what.
Speaker 6Use the nunchuck.
Speaker 3He can really nunchuck, he can really chuck it.
Speaker 12He can chuck none. Yeah, it's pretty good.
Speaker 2So yeah, Joey Bro's on Spotify, but not Chris Gaines.
Speaker 9That's upsetting, because Chris Gaines is.
Speaker 2Where are the bodies, Chris?
Speaker 9Yeah, he was. It was great, my 12 or 13-year-old emotional self. He was like, really I was listening to.
Speaker 13Dixie Chicks on the way over here.
Speaker 9You can't say that anymore.
Speaker 13Dixie Chicks, they're the chicks, I can say say that anymore, dixie Chicks.
Speaker 9They're the Chicks. I can say what I want.
Speaker 3Wait, did they actually change their name? Yeah, because Dixie is racist, chicksie Dix. Something about slavery, something about the South.
Speaker 6So stupid.
Speaker 9There's a whole. Well, I listened to it.
Speaker 6She listened to the Dixie.
Speaker 2Chicks.
Speaker 3Yeah, not the chick. So how stoked are you about the truck? Pick them up, truck.
Speaker 9Oh, I'm pretty stoked, pretty stoked, a little weird right now. Oh, you gotta get that tag though.
Speaker 3Well, that's what's nice too, is that? Well, with the new, whatever they call it, you know my, my tag just uh came right off of the old, uh kia yeah, I'm gonna pay the yeah, and I have 30 days to pay it, it'll still be probably extremely fucking expensive.
Speaker 2I think they extended it, didn't they have a new law now?
Speaker 9I thought they extended it to 60 days.
Speaker 3Well, they had the dealership to always tell you 30 days. But I mean you could ride around with that motherfucker for a year.
Speaker 9That's one of our favorite games is paper tax, which one you can see that's the longest out of date.
Speaker 12There's some pretty bad ones out there. Well, and what's cool?
Speaker 3about it too, though People don't care anymore, they don't have like. You're not getting taxed on it Every day, you don't pay it or some shit. And if you do they have a cap on?
Speaker 2it, so we'll only go.
Speaker 3It's a flat late fee, that's the late fee. So if you're six months out of date of getting it, or three years, $200 or whatever. It is that flat rate.
Speaker 2It's the same. I had a buddy that get in it or three years, $200 or whatever. It is that flat rate, it's the same. Yeah, I had a buddy that got, like one of those Nissan Leafs, the all electrical ones. Your buddy. This was like your buddy, this was like. But he also has an FJ Cruiser.
Speaker 3I mean, I bought a Kia Rio.
Speaker 9And he just got it to.
Speaker 2He just got it to zip around town instead of taking his FJ Cruiser everywhere. But he had that car for years, never tagged it. See, there's people that do it, there's people that do it. But I also think it's ridiculous that you're going to the dealership, you might have put a down payment down or you've traded in your vehicle, and they expect you to pay in 30 days the sum of money, that they don't tell you what it's going to be until you go to the tag agency and they're like oh, $2,000.
Speaker 3Oh shit, Half the shit we have to pay as human beings is just fucking stupid.
Speaker 10Like property taxes.
Speaker 3I hate that. Grandparents let me know every time.
Speaker 2I hate property taxes like yeah, I'm sure it fucking sucks, especially because their, their values probably went up with everything that's been built around them now.
Speaker 9So yeah, what did you get for Christmas?
Speaker 3Yeah, I got not a new car or a new truck, you don't need one you got the boo. I do have the boo.
Speaker 2The boo is awesome, I guess. For Christmas I finally booked a project through Chris Freehofer, so that was one of my goals for the year and I barely made it, but I did. And that commercial is Huh.
Speaker 9That's your present To himself.
Speaker 2I mean it's a good present, it's a pretty good present.
Speaker 9It's a good present.
Speaker 2But it's for Husky Liners. You need one which he might get some for his truck.
Speaker 8Who knows, I don't know. Yeah, you might need a Husky Liner If I get like a discount code or something, yeah, but, yeah, they make like rubberized mats for trucks and cars and stuff.
Speaker 3Custom design car mats.
Speaker 2I filmed it just a couple of days ago.
Speaker 5So now, this truck is awesome with this lighter in it.
Speaker 9He was a welder.
Speaker 2It's a national commercial. Oh my god. So you will see this pretty mug, even if you are in Detroit.
Speaker 9Yep, for all of you are in Detroit.
Speaker 2Yep.
Speaker 9For all of our listeners in Detroit.
Speaker 2City.
Speaker 9Or in San.
Speaker 2Diego and I did a commercial for a car lot up in Tulsa. That was several months ago.
Speaker 9Yeah.
Speaker 2Earlier this year and I just had a Facebook friend post on my wall hey, I just saw you in a commercial. Did he poke you first?
Speaker 6No, he didn't use the poke feature, I think, so right, I'm going to poke everyone on my friend's list.
Speaker 2Go do it now. Yeah, just poke everyone.
Speaker 9You've been poked. God, that was so creepy.
Speaker 10I know. Remember that you get a notification.
Speaker 5It's like been poked god that was so creepy.
Speaker 3I don't remember that you get a notification. Yes, like wesley poked you. Yeah, I was. I was poking bitches, I'm telling jordan.
Speaker 9I'm telling jordan I probably poked her. It's just like the weirdest thing, because, like, like, all I can picture is like the weird kid in class that like really has no social skills. He's blue.
Speaker 5You're just like like really has no social skills. They eat glue and you're just like Prank.
Speaker 2Hi, hey, hi.
Speaker 9I don't want to say hi, but I'll do that Poke chew.
Speaker 3Oh, it's not what it means, dad, yeah, oh sorry, definitely not now.
Speaker 2Insertion Y'all ready for some talks? Penetration I'm ready for some talks Because we got some.
Speaker 9Penetration. I'm ready for some talks.
Speaker 6Tacos.
Speaker 3I'm worried.
Speaker 9Oh boy, get it. Granny, granny, you're going to fall down oh no, oh my God, that's a concussion. Broke her wrist, hit her head. That was a broken hip.
Speaker 3I'm worried about her.
Speaker 7Hey, you can't park there, fuck you, fuck you.
Speaker 3This is some of my favorite videos. This is some of my favorite videos.
Speaker 2I want to say it to someone so bad. This was Taylor and Nicolette last night trying to go caroling.
Speaker 7Hey oh shit.
Speaker 2There's Taylor in the golf cart. She still has a phone in her hand.
Speaker 7Come on, let's go Christmas caroling Guys you pussies oh no, it's going to go away.
Speaker 2Oh, I got to press the brake. Here we go.
Speaker 3Oh no, she about drunk as hell.
Speaker 5She did the exact same movement. Look how sunburned she is. I just ran into your house.
Speaker 3It's not even her house.
Speaker 14It's not even her house I was going to say what the hell just happened.
Speaker 8I ran Carol again. She was so calm about it.
Speaker 9Yes, I'm fine, I tried to back up when there's rain, there's thunder.
Speaker 2I think that was Dan and Sheik you can hear the bees pollinating oh my god, that's me it's so
Speaker 3good, why she shit herself?
Speaker 8Why, why?
Speaker 5Someone in here.
Speaker 8Someone in here.
Speaker 3Someone in here? Oh, that's disgusting. Why is he commenting?
Speaker 2yeah and then that was dan at mom's house.
Speaker 9It was after she cleared the whole room. I love it when y'all fight. Violence turns me on turns me on.
Speaker 10Those are weird.
Crazy Car Accident and Meth Discussion
Speaker 2Oh god, oh no hey, you can't park there. You sold me a lemon oh I like this guy here's dad I'm drunk, you drunk.
Speaker 14Yeah, I wasn't supposed to get drunk today, but I am. I wasn't supposed to get drunk today, fuck it. I told myself I wasn't going to get drunk today, but here I am.
Speaker 3Here I am that is David, that is Grandpa. What are you?
Speaker 13going to do.
Speaker 10What are you going to do? What are you going to do? That was Dad and Jeff at the concert 100% india.
Speaker 8That was dad and jeff at the concert 100 walked out and they were like you will only hear the food you're most craving right now penis.
Speaker 2It sounded like timmy penis. It did sound like timmy it's accurate.
Speaker 9What are those Wieners?
Speaker 8Your pussy stinks your pussy stinks, your pussy stinks, your pussy stinks.
Speaker 7Feminine wash.
Speaker 8Feminine wash Feminine, wash Feminine. Wash Whyine Feminine. Why is it so good though it takes the smell away.
Speaker 9Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, y'all posse style God damn.
Speaker 5Two Marines tag team me in my car last night. Oh, had this monster that smelled like a foxhole in Iran when they were done clapping these poopy cheeks.
Speaker 14Poopy cheeks.
Speaker 10I didn't forget to wipe. That's what their tongues were for.
Speaker 14Please book a cameo.
Speaker 10Link in bio.
Speaker 9What the fuck is wrong with you, do you pay extra for her to not have teeth? What did?
Speaker 14you just say you were going to do to me.
Speaker 8I'm going to punch you in the asshole. I'm going to punch you in the asshole.
Speaker 2I'm in the middle of it all. First of all, let me preface this video with there are fucking adults like this.
Speaker 3Yeah, showcasing it right here.
Speaker 2Right here Like.
Speaker 3I can't believe this video is real.
Speaker 2There are people that fucking act this way Grown child Blows my mind.
Speaker 3Grown child.
Speaker 2I have food in my car. I have food in my car. I have food in my car. I'm on an, an uber eats. I've got to make this.
Speaker 3They did a three dollar tip. They need their taco bell. This is sorry.
Speaker 8This is one of those situations where I fully support police brutality Beat the fuck out of that bitch Body, slam her, fuck that woman Pull that taser out.
Speaker 2Oh my god Rip.
Speaker 3Taylor said body slam her, leave me alone.
Speaker 2Leave me alone. You need to get me you need to fucking get me.
Speaker 8And then what's funny. Can I get my Uber Eats?
Speaker 2She was bringing me my food.
Speaker 3Can I me my food? I actually came here. I knew she was gonna be late. She's delivering, right over here.
Speaker 9Just can I have my food?
Speaker 2I tracked it on the app but they always call someone like a dad, a boyfriend, a husband and they're like you need to get here now like what are they gonna do?
Speaker 3teleport and what are they doing?
Speaker 2They're busy.
Speaker 14So what happened?
Speaker 11Mom leg turned and was car in front of me and all of a sudden I got hit from behind. Okay, and then I pulled over here All right?
Speaker 4What's your inspiration?
Speaker 8here, kayla. I'm in front of Pickett's Inn. Kayla, what happened? Get here now. These cops are pissing me off.
Speaker 2Kayla you're not going anywhere. You're not going anywhere. You're not going anywhere. The cops are pissing her off.
Speaker 11Where are you going Stop, you're going to be detained. Stop, stop, detain her.
Speaker 7He wasn't in the green light, there's no action.
Speaker 8Why are you yelling why? Are you yelling Because I you freaking out. Why are you yelling?
Speaker 2Because I'm in the middle of work, because the cops aren't in the middle of work, like they wanted to do this.
Speaker 7Well, you're not going anywhere. I'm not going anywhere. Chris, get over here. I'm not going anywhere, you need to get here now.
Speaker 3That was her boyfriend or husband.
Speaker 8They're pin.
Speaker 2Now let's see what the car looks like. It's not that bad. Yeah, I need to see who's gonna start. Look at the hood, those hoods, damn it in like it's not fucked, I mean you're in a Honda Fit, what do you expect?
Speaker 8I need to see that I'm not, then can you start it. Then can you start it.
Speaker 9I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm breaking down. Can?
Speaker 8you please.
Speaker 5The cops are trying to arrest me. That other cop is like what the fuck's happening?
Speaker 2Yeah, but this is great.
Speaker 8Oh, my God.
Speaker 10Detective Sire baby.
Speaker 9Please, no, he's like what do you do?
Speaker 8Get here now. Please Get here now.
Speaker 3This is just an accident. It's not even like a crime.
Speaker 2No no.
Speaker 6She's gonna get it.
Speaker 7She's gonna get it. I didn't do anything. I didn't get it. I didn't do anything. Get out of the street.
Speaker 2I didn't do anything wrong. I just rear-ended somebody, but I didn't do anything wrong.
Speaker 3I mean, I feel that I feel, it. I'm just like come on, Chill out.
Speaker 7My life is over.
Speaker 5I have a she's like come on, chill out, my life is over.
Speaker 3I have a den in my Honda Fit, so here's the other side of mental health.
Speaker 2Here we go.
Speaker 3Is this a fucking fuzzy?
Speaker 10Is he a worm?
Speaker 3No, that's a fuzzy right there.
Speaker 10Or a furry.
Speaker 4I was saying fuzzy, oh no.
Speaker 8Meow right there, or furry? I was saying furry, oh no, is he stuck?
Speaker 1Is he?
Speaker 9handicapped.
Speaker 13I think so, oh no.
Speaker 9Why does he have a Chucky Finster wig on?
Speaker 8Oh shit.
Speaker 9That's a butt plug, ah.
Speaker 8I know I shouldn't, but I'm genuinely fucking disgusted.
Speaker 5Why are they filming? I know I shouldn't, but I'm genuinely fucking disgusted. I'm just robbing people.
Speaker 3Why are they filming? See, I'm just like, do your thing.
Speaker 6Why do you got to put it on the?
Speaker 3internet.
Speaker 9People are so weird.
Speaker 2And his shirt says nope, nope. Oh, this is great. I think they ought to take out break dancing and put this in the Olympics. Oh yeah, football.
Speaker 16This is not your average game of football, but the rules are the same, except for one small detail. You have to dance at all times.
Speaker 6Oh.
Speaker 16When the match is over, you get points for both goals and your overall dance performance. What the fuck, so you can actually win a match points for both goals and your overall dance performance. What the fuck, so you can actually win a match despite scoring fewer goals than your opponent?
Speaker 13Some gay person made that up. That's gay sport.
Speaker 3Certified gay Gay. How are there so many people there watching, Watching?
Speaker 9right. Are you kidding me? If there was something that said downtown Oklahoma City today dance and football, I'd be like fuck, yeah, I want to watch that. I want to get high as shit and go watch it.
Speaker 6You're right.
Speaker 8They're all skinny, though, so it's good for your physique Because you're always moving.
Speaker 9Oh, get the walk when are they at?
Speaker 2These are different matches and they all have a ton of people at them.
Speaker 3This is obviously not an American. Yeah, this is.
Speaker 9Europe, yeah, speeded.
Speaker 3This is France, and can you do like private dance-offs?
Speaker 9Yeah. Well they're guarding each other. Boom Ooh, get it Look at the short shorts.
Speaker 13I like it.
Speaker 9How do you dance? Oh and kick. Look at that, look at this wiener.
Speaker 2Nice that's a good move. You gotta go. Why are you on your tippy toes?
Speaker 13they're dancing oh, the teeth. So this motherfucker wakes me up and tells me to brush my mop that I did not brush.
Speaker 2She also didn't brush them.
Speaker 3Honey we're going to McDonald's.
Speaker 2And this guy definitely doesn't help her out with dental care.
Speaker 13Brush them off, okay, and get dressed that I did not get dressed, okay. And takes me out in the middle of fucking everybody and got in their mama and asked me to marry him.
Speaker 2Oh my god and then he flips the camera off asked me to marry him I wish him oh god stop rapping it.
Speaker 9Why the ears stop?
Speaker 2it not for me, dog I I I um here's the thing I think she, she, she comes with a smell. She definitely puts patchouli Patchouli, sandalwood.
Speaker 9BO BO, totally down. If women don't want to shave, they don't want to take care of their eyebrows, they don't want to shave their legs, their armpits, like that's fine, that's fine. But your unibrow, but like don't put barrettes in them, Glitter. Well, people are into that, I guess. I guess, that's a kink for somebody.
Speaker 13Yeah.
Speaker 9It's me playing basketball, oh.
Self-Defense Lessons and Unexpected Birth
Speaker 2It's me playing basketball. Oh shit, oh yeah. Yeah, dude, you see.
Speaker 7I don't smoke Okay.
Speaker 9Anymore.
Speaker 7I don't drink.
Speaker 9Yeah, you do.
Speaker 7I don't Do drugs Anymore. I practice all the time.
Speaker 13When you don't smoke, you don't drink, you know you can have something like this Okay, see that Cadillac Escalade.
Speaker 14Yeah.
Speaker 2Is that really a?
Speaker 3Cadillac.
Speaker 6And you see my trailer house in the background.
Speaker 13Six Mustangs.
Speaker 12Six Mustangs, suzuki and this is what you can have if you don't drink you don't smoke Mustangs, Six Mustangs Suzuki.
Speaker 6And this is what you can have if you don't drink you don't smoke and you don't do drugs.
Speaker 2You can do this right here.
Speaker 3A hundred percent. An Oklahoman and I for real, would fucking put money on it.
Speaker 9Yeah, well, it's Sewell. You got the badge on that bottom left.
Speaker 6It wasn't just here, it's Tulsa yeah.
Speaker 2Wow, there's something else in here in the background. Just hold on.
Speaker 3I'm real proud.
Speaker 13You know what I'm saying? I do.
Speaker 2Sure when you don't do drugs.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 13You don't smoke.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 13And you don't drink.
Speaker 3He's high on meth. Right now.
Speaker 14Yeah, he definitely does drugs 100%, and then you can walk around with nice hats on.
Speaker 13Okay, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2Uh-huh, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 13Nice clothes, nice clothes, leather trench coat.
Speaker 2Yeah, that's right here Starts. Look at the black tarp in the background. Oh boy, you don't drink, you don't smoke, you don't do drugs. You can live in a trailer house that has a wall out that you have to put a black tarp in. Yeah, right there.
Speaker 9Oh yeah, yeah, Because that's where the meth lab, that was the meth lab. Look.
Speaker 2Yeah, and he's got a balcony accessible via aluminum ladder, via. So don't do drugs, don't it's?
Speaker 3a good message. I wish I would have saw that video when I was 13.
Speaker 9Your life could have been in a different place.
Speaker 3right now, I could have been in Cadillacs trench coats and scary hats. Right now.
Speaker 9Whoa.
Speaker 6Was he the?
Speaker 15replacement for the DARE program.
Speaker 9He can't walk right now, hey.
Speaker 5Whoa.
Speaker 8Whoa.
Speaker 7Whoa.
Speaker 2Whoa Flexing.
Speaker 3Very normal.
Speaker 1Now this next video, the start of this next one. I love this dude Stoic, stoic. Okay, larry Dickham here again Larry Dickham. From my custom-built dojo to teach you guys another lesson on some shit you probably didn't know how to do because I wasn't there to teach you, but now I am here.
Speaker 3Today's lesson is how to properly defend yourself against a short person.
Speaker 1A short person.
Speaker 9I'm going to let you know if this would work, because we all know short people like to talk more shit.
Speaker 1I don't know what it is about being short, but they be talking a lot of shit we do. What do I mean by short? Anybody who is under this is for me considered a short person Heel heel, heel, heel, heel heel. Anywhere in between. You are considered a short person, so your ass can get it. Your ass can get it. Let's say you're out up in the club, you got your little drink, you're trying to holler at something that's passing by or whatever.
Speaker 1Then the shark motherfucker come up to you and talk some shit, which he usually do. What you want to do is put your drink down on the stool Don't put it on top of the bar, because somebody put some shit in there. Then you wake up with your ass tore out. Put it down in a safe house. You turn to the shark motherfucker and be like hey brother, I know you come here to have a good time and I came here to have a good time. I ain't really want no trouble. So you leave him until five cents of security. When you put your hand on top of his head, as if you're saying goodbye, brother, it was nice seeing you you give him one of these elbows it's called the turbo elbow To the front of his skull and your elbow coming out the back of his skull. He ain't going to want no more. After that, your problem is solved. Or step two what you can do is be like hey brother, I know you can't have a good time and I can't have a good time. Let's just part ways and go on about our business.
Speaker 1Just so happens, you came to the club with a pot of grits. What Uncooked? Uncooked With the grits in the bowl. Heat that shit up. Tell Uncooked Put the grits in the bowl. Heat that shit up. Tell the bartender and the private to do it for you. You heat them grits up. What the fuck? You get that shit nice and hot. Then you Go in, go in. Go in, you splash his motherfucking face with them hot ass grits. While you splash his face with them hot ass grits, he goes. My eyes, my eyes. You give him another one of these Turbo elbow number two. You're going to have no problems with that shit, motherfucker.
Speaker 5Oh, my God.
Speaker 9I want to take his class.
Speaker 5I win. I had a baby in the car. What, oh my gosh.
Speaker 9That is Sammy. It's the best first story ever. She's just walking around. Why are you not walking into a hospital?
Speaker 2She's going to explode.
Speaker 10She don't need one, I have probably filmed this video like six times now. I am so nervous, so please bear with me. I talk really fast when I'm anxious. I just I want to answer some questions. Hop on here. Hi, first off, my name is Sam. I'm the mom that had her baby in the car that car on the way to my birth location.
Speaker 7so I was not birthing in a hospital.
Speaker 10That's why I was not going to the hospital. That's why we didn't go to the hospital we were headed to my midwife. Um, I live in a pretty small house and we didn't have enough room in there to have. My intended birth was a water birth, so we we decided on an alternate location, which we were so lucky to be able to get, and birth at, almost birth at, but have the birth at. We just didn't quite make it there.
Speaker 2That was it. She just birthed in the car, just like walked in the house.
Speaker 9Oh, I like this one.
Speaker 8Try not to be a cunt. It's Christmas, oh, I like this one.
Speaker 7They're sweet, adelines Sing us a tale notes of stone Done by your presence. Love the oxman show. Pick a box.
Speaker 8Take me, Terry, have another sherry. Try not to be a cunt.
Speaker 7Try not to be a cunt. Open the ring, it's hot, slam up the lable. Try not to be a cunt. C-u-n-t. Cuntity, cuntity, cunt.
Speaker 9Can we carol that one? Can we carol that one? Yeah, I'll carol that one. Cuntity, cuntity, cunt, cuntity, cuntity, cunt.
Speaker 2Dropping her off have fun calling me oh the show's over here.
Speaker 3Some of these guys fingered me, picking them up Whoa.
Speaker 9Whoa, what did she say? What did she?
Speaker 3say Whoa.
Speaker 10All right, have fun. Call me if you need me. All right, some of these guys fingered me.
Speaker 5Some of these guys fingered me.
Speaker 2And he's just like huh.
Speaker 5He's like oh no, all right.
Speaker 9Some of these guys fingered me.
Speaker 2This is from the dog show. Oh he packing on Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3Swing it.
Speaker 9Look at that.
Speaker 6Those are some old man balls. Why is his?
Speaker 9dick on the ground.
Speaker 7Oh my.
Speaker 8God, Boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing oh he's kicking up.
Speaker 2There's Taylor's next tattoo.
Speaker 9Hey, take that to your tattoo artist.
Speaker 1There, honey, I'm running it up Bingo tear.
Speaker 7Put it in reverse Tear.
Speaker 9Put it in reverse. Oh shit, oh shit, not at the Goodwill.
Speaker 2Tear. This is. This is grandma at the nursing home. Y'all having lunch Lunch. Lunch Tear.
Speaker 8That person gets hot. Oh my god, oh shit, murdering. What's going on, tear? Oh my God, I'm murdering. What's going on, terry, terry?
Speaker 2That's fantastic.
Speaker 3That's a manslaughter. What?
Speaker 7Are you a gay? Mm-hmm, congratulations. This means you can wear my new design.
Speaker 1It's gay time let's have a crash on the gender and do nozzling with the homos, Also in lesbian version and queer version Queer and do nozzling with the homos.
Speaker 3What the hell? Why do I want that?
Speaker 1I think your mom ate my doorbell because her breath smells like my ding dong Ho, ho, Ho ho.
Speaker 3Why was the video? Just his mouth, my ding dong.
Speaker 8Oh, no Can you jingle your bells.
Speaker 9No, oh dear Lord, just do this, Don't do it. Is she putting a cassette tape in?
Speaker 2Yeah, Eight track.
Speaker 7Stroke of my liquor suck on my cock.
Speaker 8Stroke my lick my suck on my cock Wrong one Hucky.
Speaker 2Laughing at videos of firefighters rescuing in reverse, so they're putting the little shits back in the burning house. Hey, get him.
Speaker 9Get him up in there now. Yeet him in. He's laughing so hard. Oh, I love this. I had to put this one in here.
Speaker 10Why do we need this much?
Speaker 7fire for three Shit, fuck. No, don't go fast. Don't go fast, jack. Stop, stop, stop.
Speaker 2He takes a breath Stop.
Speaker 9Ah, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. He takes a breath.
Speaker 3I don't know.
Speaker 9See, that's the good, wholesome trouble you should have been getting into my brain automatically unlike 98% of other people, I fucking hate those videos.
Speaker 3I find zero enjoyment, zero laughter. They're fucking dumb. Unlike 98% of other people, I fucking hate those videos. I find zero enjoyment, zero laughter. They're fucking dumb. I don't know, because something's fucking wrong with me.
Speaker 9It's wholesome. I fucking hate it. You don't like it because it's wholesome.
Speaker 3I'm looking at it practically like you're an idiot.
Speaker 9You're dumb.
Speaker 3Why would you do that to any sort of vehicle? Get out of there with all those cups of water.
Speaker 2From a new truck. I wouldn't let it happen in my fucking Rio.
Speaker 3Get the fuck out of here with six cups of open water.
Speaker 2You're like, hey, I'm getting ready to trade this bitch in, let's do it. Let's do it Never.
Speaker 6No, it would never happen.
Speaker 3Not once Lids only.
Speaker 13Lids only.
Speaker 2Thanksgiving is almost here, yeah, so.
Speaker 8I missed this video at.
Speaker 2Thanksgiving, and so now we're just early for Thanksgiving 2025.
Speaker 5So that's what this is. It's time to eat all the turkey and trimmings. It's time to feel fat. It's time to be thankful for your friends and family. Quit dieting.
Speaker 9Does she think she's good or is this a joke? Quit dieting. Quit dieting. I'm trying to be nice, you don't have to be. She put it out there Quit dieting.
Speaker 2I mean, have you started? I mean, for a day, enjoy the food that's on the table, quit dieting, I mean have you started.
Speaker 5I mean what? Enjoy the food that's on the table. Feel fat. Be thankful for your friends and family. Be thankful for your fans.
Speaker 2What's the strap on her?
Speaker 3I don't know, it's all I've been looking at.
Speaker 5Be thankful for your health. Be thankful for everything. Be thankful for your health. Be thankful for everything. Be thankful for a roof over your head.
Speaker 2Why are we, she said, be thankful for everything, but she keeps?
Speaker 9Are you talking about the thing that's on her thigh? I don't think that's a strap. I think that's part of her leggings.
Speaker 3It does not look like it.
Speaker 9It looks like it's dangling. While she's not bouncing, I want to try to read her shirt. A wise woman once said fuck it fuck this shit. Oh yeah, and she lived happily ever after because some people don't I'm gonna make you one it's time to be grateful for everything.
Speaker 5Thanksgiving is almost here. Thanksgiving is almost here.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's almost here thanksgiving from me.
Speaker 5Why?
Speaker 3is she leaning?
Speaker 9why are you so aggressive?
Speaker 3somebody said something in the background. I feel like I heard somebody say something.
Speaker 2It's her wife that.
Speaker 3You know you Get off TikTok.
Speaker 2That doesn't. Doesn't help that doesn't look fully like a woman. I think it's a dude Anyway 10-4.
Speaker 1This is almost embarrassing. We were sitting here and we just realized we've got eat cop on our ball Yum, eat cop and the word yum right beside of it. So somebody here eat some yummy cop. Come on, come on.
Speaker 9Come on, that's great. That was a good one. That's the shit.
Speaker 4No, no, no, no, no, no, no no.
Workplace Complaints and Confrontation
Speaker 9Well, let's see Honey, hello, what do I do? The buttons do not work. She pressed the stuffer Screws. Oh no, that makes me sad. Someone help the old people.
Speaker 3That's how I feel with a lot of technology actually you are her.
Speaker 10Word of the day is beaver burp, an expulsion of air from a vagina Also known as a muff puff.
Speaker 9It's called a queef Beaver burp.
Speaker 2Beaver burp.
Speaker 9Beaver burp.
Speaker 3He was pretty stoked to let us know that.
Speaker 11I will not pay for a woman's funeral unless she's my wife.
Speaker 12Fair enough.
Speaker 11If she is just my girlfriend, then I will not be paying for her funeral. Okay, if she is just my girlfriend, it is not my responsibility to bear the financial burden of laying her to rest. He killed his girlfriend.
Speaker 2Let me tell you something you're not gonna have to worry about it, yeah, yeah, because she's dead, he's not getting a girlfriend. He already did, he would have to get a could also first also wait.
Speaker 9Is this a? Is this a concern raised by the populace?
Speaker 2yeah, yeah, I'm sure he's asked all the time.
Speaker 3I'm more on your point now For my hundred percent there's a female version of him out there, and they found each other.
Speaker 2Oh, 100% yeah no doubt she's like I will not.
Speaker 11They're not paying for each other's females, for my, boyfriend, her parents and the rest of her family should bear the financial burden of laying her to rest. If she is just my girlfriend and not my wife, what business do I have paying for her funeral?
Speaker 9none, none, you're well, my god people are so weird thank you, tom cruise none. Why is his mouth like that?
Speaker 6without the rest of his face moving.
Speaker 7Getting it.
Speaker 9Sorry.
Speaker 2That is weird. That's a church right there.
Speaker 9God bless.
Speaker 2All right.
Speaker 6All right, all right.
Speaker 2Get the fuck out of there. Yeah, so here we go. Women's bathroom.
Speaker 9I'm not backing down with it. So here we go. Women's bathroom. I'm not backing down with it, Mm-hmm.
Speaker 3That's me when I wipe.
Speaker 14I tooted.
Speaker 9Oh, my God, I don't have a phone, probably, I thought. I had a play. She's on the phone. That's, casey.
Speaker 2Sometimes you do that Every time she pees, she poops, not every time she's backwards, not every time. Usually every time you poop you pee?
Speaker 9No, not on the phone, but she's backwards. I pooted, I pooted.
Speaker 2I didn't know I had to go potty, potty, potty potty.
Speaker 9But if I had that in the chamber I would know that I need to yeah that doesn't sneak up on you like that.
Speaker 5Oh no.
Speaker 3Why did you do this? I don't like how it looks like she's leaning forward. No, I can't get my eyes off of it.
Speaker 2So are those diabetic compression socks, so what I like to notice about these videos are things in the background.
Speaker 3Yeah, they're disgusting.
Speaker 2So there's a walker in the doorway of one bedroom and one of those little stool things that have a potty in it, yeah. Toilet chair yeah.
Speaker 5I'm one hot woman. I'm very attractive and I'm very sexy too. I'm one hot woman. I get everybody wet and wild for me no Were there bear hose wings. One hot woman.
Speaker 9It's on.
Speaker 5I drive everybody wild and they end up leaving their partners for me.
Speaker 3That was a good rhyme, that was a bar.
Speaker 5That was a good bar.
Speaker 3I'm one hot woman.
Speaker 5I'm one hot woman. Ain't I sexy y'all?
Speaker 3Ain't I sexy y'all? Ain't that sexy y'all? See it's good and healthy to have a positive mindset about yourself, self-confidence, absolutely but that's delirium.
Speaker 5Delirium.
Speaker 2Delulu. Exactly like the guy that's a kitty cat yeah 100% Same. Yeah, same same, same scenario, but now you have a new jingle for your hot date.
Speaker 6One hot woman, you should have walked in and sang that I am going to Over chicken. Alfredo, there should be a.
Speaker 13I'm so ready.
Speaker 9It's so good there should be like a, like, a, a sing off between her and Geraldine.
Speaker 2Geraldine all the way she will kick her ass. Oh, my God, this one's so good, I love this. Oh, and the reason I love this.
Speaker 9Why Black?
Speaker 2people. No, I do love black people, wait.
Speaker 9You have one black friend.
Speaker 6I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 9Ron, you have one black friend, ron.
Speaker 2I had a little incident where I had to go back into a store and lay into a guy that was an employee of the store Lay into a guy that was an employee of the store. Because one employee came up to me and Casey mainly Casey and said hey, my coworker, thanks. You find it was a student of yours, but she's embarrassed and she kind of ran off. So just let you know that she's in here hiding somewhere.
Speaker 9And if you see her say hi, yeah, say hi, all right, yeah, normal Sweet Right.
Speaker 2So former student just let you know that she's in here hiding somewhere and if you see her, say hi, yeah, say hi. All right, yeah, normal, sweet right.
Speaker 2So former student, it's fine and so casey does, finds her and says hey, hi knows her name and said that and told me that we had a great relationship in school. She was a great student. Yeah, we were Blah, blah, blah. So she does that. We make a purchase. But just a couple of minutes before that, that kid was going to check us out but his fellow employee he wasn't even a manager.
Speaker 9Oh I didn't know that.
Speaker 2So this guy walks up to him and is like almost nose to nose and he was like I told you about doing that. Stop bullying people. This is the second time I've worked with you that you've done that to somebody and you're going to stop and like walks off.
Speaker 9And the kid that told me, like hey, your former student is over there, she wants to say hi, but she's too embarrassed Is a kid, a high school kid. This other employee is a whole grown ass man. Whole grown ass adult man Fucking little dick and I couldn't let it go Good, good for you.
Speaker 2You shouldn't.
Speaker 3I thought I was about to let it go. Good, good for you.
Speaker 2I thought I was about to let it go. I walked out, I get in the car, we start driving. And I said I can't, I can't, I don't like people like that, and I turned right around.
Speaker 3And I went back and I walked in. He drove the car through the front doors.
Speaker 2And that's our next video and I asked that kid. I was like, hey, where's that guy that chewed you out? Have him come up here. And he was like, oh okay, and so went and got the guy and I just chewed his ass.
Speaker 3Listen, fucker.
Speaker 6What store is this DC Comics?
Speaker 3We were pissed really, yeah, I'll go in there and put a dude in a headlock right now and I was like what are you?
Speaker 9he's a nerdy, skinny little white dude with long hair. Fuck him up. And I was like what are you doing?
Speaker 2I was like you know, this young man was just is being respectful, having a good time, and he let someone know that they had a former student here. Like you, came up to this young man and were intimidating, and a thing that bothers me is that you did it five feet away from customers.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah like if you wanted to have that talk and you took him around the corner I'm none the wiser, no one would have known. But you did it in front of customers, and not only just a customer, but the customers that were in that situation. And yeah, yeah, and oh my god, I just chewed his ass. And then some other short little fat fuck walks up because I tell this guy. I said, look, employees have a right to have a safe um work environment free of intimidation. And what you did? You were nose to nose with him and I heard the way you talked. And then this fat little fuck goes well, isn't that what you're doing to him? And I looked and I was like who the fuck are you? Yeah, bitch, just a customer.
Speaker 2And I was like oh, oh well, I might have to start doing it to you, yeah, and then he goes. Well, maybe you need to learn to pick your battles. And I looked at him and I went. Maybe you need to learn that spooky and I and the kid should have fought him, the kid like that got reprimanded or whatever.
Speaker 9He's standing there like this is great.
Speaker 3He's like what the fuck?
Speaker 9I'm probably going to get fired if it's worth it.
Speaker 2People suck, yeah, yeah, people suck. But you know what? I didn't play the intro to that, so now we'll play the intro to this.
Speaker 9Are we not watching this video? Huh, oh yeah, the fuck. Sorry. Are we not watching this video? Huh, oh yeah, the fuck, hey do you know what's happening.
Speaker 15Get your shit together, man, I'm lost. I'm lost. There we go.
Speaker 4Hey, how you doing, how you doing Hi, what can I help you?
Speaker 15My name, agent Ratliff, with OSHA Cares, diversity Affairs, id number 33712. And I was coming here looking for see a lead, mr Lee, right here. Okay, I'm coming out here to go over some complaints. You have an office. You want to go over these complaints.
Speaker 13No, I'm not the one to talk to. I don't have any idea what this is about.
Speaker 15Your name on this list. It say, right here, y'all need to humble yourself because y'all don't know shit. Y'all be talking about people behind their back. Anson in the receptionist is fucking and getting high at work. It say y'all racist as fuck. Y' is getting high at work. They say y'all racist as y'all ain't. And everybody wish nick was still here. Now. Who is nick? He said what are you talking about? These are complaints that will file on behalf of the company. What address do you have?
Speaker 922, 22, 17 rock chapel road that's us, give me more information about you and what is she doing this is recorded first of all, you need to calm your attitude down, man.
Speaker 15Yeah, I don't like the attitude. You come out here loud and when I came in, nobody. Nobody greeted me.
Speaker 15There's the door buddy, there's the door, buddy. Nah, you get your ass up out of here. All y'all. Y'all is racist because nobody greeted me when I came in this motherfucker for a for a company. I am the cop no one give a fuck about. Y'all is racist because nobody greeted me when I came in this motherfucker For a company. I am the cop. No one give a fuck about. Y'all calling no cops. Oh shit, racist Tony get him.
Speaker 7You heard what he said Get him.
Speaker 15He said get your black ass out of here. We got it on camera. He just said get your black ass out of here. You don't speak to negative. Okay, what's your name, sir John? My name is Agent Ratliff with OSHA Cares, diversity Affairs, and we was coming in here to go over some complaints about.
Speaker 15Mr Lee, fat lady right here, get the fuck off. Get the fuck off and your ass is getting fired. You don't act like that while you're on the fucking clock. Hey, she's fucking clock, it don't matter, I'll shut all this shit down. He just said get your black ass out of here and it's on camera. And we.
Speaker 14That's a fucking lawsuit yes, he did.
Speaker 3We got it on camera, motherfucker.
Speaker 2Motherfucker Damn, he was poofed, he like so of course that's not like a real. Oh yeah, that's his poof, he like, so of course that's not like a real oh yeah, so you're, anything that's his, but I think he takes like people reach out to him and say, hey, this place fired me, but they are fucking awful yeah, and send him all these complaints and then he goes in and does that shit.
Speaker 8It's so funny that's so silly Is that Molly.
Speaker 3It's beautiful.
Speaker 9Molly or Solly are one of those. Definitely Molly. Yeah, ma Ma, you're dying to doble up for me. You need an answer.
Speaker 14Mama. Mama, you're starting to double up on me. You need an answer.
Speaker 12Mama.
Speaker 14Well, it doesn't know how. I get curious, right. I looked up on Google. How does the baby come out? Mom, you have to do that eight times Eight, sweet. Well, it doesn't know how you stretch a rubber band and it breaks. Do that eight times Eight. We Come on. Don't know how you scratch a rubber band and it breaks. If you scratch it too far and it breaks, is that what happened? Did I have to put it back together, or what happened?
Speaker 6What happened?
Boundaries and New Year's Resolutions
Speaker 14Or did they just leave it open and say that she'll be back next year? Mom, you did it eight, eight, eight times. I just thought the baby came right out your stomach. Okay, but I'm going to go finish getting ready and we're going to talk about this later.
Speaker 6Eight times. Eight times.
Speaker 14Eight times. I'm curious. And do we look the same? I love you even more. I admire you. I love you even more. Oh, no.
Speaker 6Shake.
Speaker 4Up Fancy Good boy, up Good boy.
Speaker 10Set Show your wiener.
Speaker 8What Show your wiener that's?
Speaker 3great, that's great.
Speaker 5Oh no.
Speaker 10Imagine.
Speaker 14Oh god.
Speaker 5You're in the car and these big naturals are just float around in this blouse just clamoring for a hammering from your mouth and dong.
Speaker 10Well, mama's jugs need to suck and mama needs some money. So so click the link in my bio and book a cameo. What?
Speaker 7the fuck is wrong with her.
Speaker 3I'm convinced already two videos. She has an OnlyFans.
Speaker 9Oh, 100%, people pay for it.
Speaker 2Do we get a cameo of her for Dan for his birthday?
Speaker 9Yes.
Speaker 2Clamorin' for a hammering beaver burps back beaver burp it's called a queef.
Speaker 8Oh yeah, clef bachelors, it's hot in here it is hot. Good morning Julia, julia turn on the fans.
Speaker 1She's got a big beaver.
Speaker 9Coochie lips. Are you going to put it on the screen? Sweetie P, are you going to put it on the screen? I don't know, maybe we're going to see, can we take a pee-pee pause, a pee-pee pause A pee-pee pause. Yeah, I need a pee-pee.
Speaker 8Okay, break time, get it girl we are back.
Speaker 5Pee-pee party.
Speaker 2So here we go, tech Talk.
Speaker 8Bachelors, let's go. Oh no, what the hell.
Speaker 3Number one contender.
Speaker 8Oh.
Speaker 2And you know what Number one contender, oh, ah, oh. And you know what A bubble he can kind of blow a bubble.
Speaker 10God, he actually had one tooth. What?
Speaker 3Even there was a couple in there.
Speaker 10Can your vagina be too wet? Oh, 100%.
Speaker 6Uh-uh, here's how Ah.
Speaker 8Kudos to that guy he's a winner.
Speaker 3That was good oh no we have for peace.
Speaker 7Let's try a little more dancing here's part of the song why does he have three recliners and why don't they match?
Speaker 2I think it's two recliners and a couch.
Speaker 9I didn't see the side. I love how the dog is just like Jesus.
Speaker 5Christ Fuck.
Speaker 9Jim again.
Speaker 2Dean is dancing.
Speaker 9I don't even call him dad, is that Jeff?
Speaker 8He's on his.
Speaker 3No, this is what Jordan sees every night.
Speaker 9Is this you getting into bed To this song?
Speaker 2Yeah, To this song.
Speaker 3When I'm home I pretty much dance everywhere I go.
Speaker 9He's really proud of his moves. Right now I have a silly move and I'm fucking proud of mine.
Speaker 3I like this guy, I like him a lot.
Speaker 6Oh, there he is Good lipstick, bud Get it.
Speaker 10Well, he likes to have a good time.
Speaker 9There's something He'll take you out dancing.
Speaker 2He's got a lot of keys and he knows where they are. He's a dog guy I. He's got a lot of keys.
Speaker 9He's got a lot of keys.
Speaker 2Doors, and he knows where they are.
Speaker 9He's a dog guy, dog guy. I think he's a Chiefs fan.
Speaker 2Looks like a Chiefs blanket over there.
Speaker 3He's a Swifty Okay okay, he's a Swifty.
Speaker 9It says go Taylor's boyfriend.
Speaker 3I had to show it again.
Speaker 9It's going to be too wet. He really is the best I really like that guy.
Speaker 3You should have plugged in a video of yourself doing that?
Speaker 8Yeah, that's right. Yes, he's in the bath he's our favorite I hushed off I hushed off.
Speaker 12Uh-oh, looks like it's tubbing season again. Oh no, I got mine all blown up Hot tubbing. I'm sorry about all the steam, because it got pretty hot in here. I was hoping maybe you could throw on your suit and drop by for a little dip A little dip.
Speaker 5Mother's about to get out, so Ew, I was hoping for one more.
Speaker 6I was hoping for one more Mother.
Speaker 5Maybe you could bring some caps out to get out. So Ew oh the mother.
Speaker 12Maybe you could bring some caps out. Caps out, I'll bring the inflatable board games, our water-resistant checkers. I win, I gotta go on another date. You win, I gotta go on another date.
Speaker 8So will you?
Speaker 7the way I win.
Speaker 12Anyways, if that sounds interesting to you, then please just let me know, let me know, let me know, blessings, blessings.
Speaker 3It makes me feel like I need to.
Speaker 9I love him.
Speaker 3Just tear the worms out of my brain.
Speaker 9This is a small person, it's a sick chest hat dude.
Speaker 7You tattooed on. My brother Got it for a pack of cigarettes.
Speaker 3That was it, that was it.
Speaker 13Oh, no, hey ladies, red lightning here.
Speaker 5Red lightning.
Speaker 13I'm sorry, red lightning.
Speaker 9He has a rash Ew, and it looks like a lightning bolt Ew, I don't like it. I don't know why.
Speaker 8I can't take it.
Speaker 3He got his nickname Red Lightning because he has rashes all over his body.
Speaker 9Look how cute and demure he is with his figure on his chin.
Speaker 8Hey, ladies.
Speaker 1The bio that you're taking but there's only one issue your boyfriend's, not me. So when you get bored of your relationship, come holler at me, okay.
Speaker 3He's fucking butt naked. He's got no clothes on.
Speaker 9There's no shot. Maybe his rash is on the inside of his butt, cheek Right above the coin seal.
Speaker 13I'm not looking for it.
Speaker 2He'll show you. You'll have to put the ointment on it.
Speaker 3I hate that segment, dude.
Speaker 13I hate that segment.
Speaker 9Sigh of.
Speaker 2Well, I hope everyone.
Speaker 9Does Steven Stevenson win?
Speaker 2Oh yeah.
Speaker 6What's his name?
Speaker 10Steven Stevens the funny bald guy.
Speaker 6The wet vagina guy.
Speaker 9He was funny, he knew what he was doing.
Speaker 2Get her wet.
Speaker 9He's original.
Speaker 3Genuine.
Speaker 13I like a sense of humor.
Speaker 8Happy birthday, Jesus.
Speaker 3Happy holidays.
Speaker 2So since we won't, since we'll be taking our little break, we won't have anything for New Year's. Let's talk real quick about New Year's resolutions.
Speaker 10Mine is to set boundaries, oh that's a good one are you being serious, you're joking no
Speaker 2okay, with who?
Speaker 13anyone, everyone anytime I feel like I need to that's good, because I'm a pushover that's good, that's good personal growth boundaries
Speaker 2you're gonna grow a set of balls yeah, yeah, get them finally full balls not half yeah not a half sack, yeah, full sack, like that basset hound.
Speaker 10Yeah, now that I'm a mature 41-year-old woman, oh, oh God.
Speaker 9You're damn near to Benapals. I know I'm going to grow balls. Tell me how it goes. It's not fun, hunter.
Speaker 3What's yours, son bun, I mean, I guess.
Speaker 13Pay that truck off.
Speaker 9I used to try not to be a dickhead, like on purpose, you mean.
Speaker 3Naturally it's not on purpose, it just happens.
Speaker 9That's what I'm saying. It's who I am.
Speaker 3I think, and I don't like it.
Speaker 9Oh, okay, so be more aware of your dickheadish tendencies.
Speaker 3Yes, be more aware that I'm kind of constantly an asshole, your DH tendencies yeah.
Speaker 13Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3Okay, yeah.
Speaker 9We'll see how it goes, see how long it lasts. You're going to laugh and I need you to just keep it to yourself. Oh, okay.
Speaker 3You're most.
Speaker 9Damn it. I don't do a resolution, but I do a word for the year. Okay. This last year's word was consistency. Okay, and that did not go at all you know, what you're fired.
Speaker 2Okay, so this year's consistency again.
Speaker 9So no, this year's word is time, okay, time and it. For me it means like one trying to work on being on time. What's going on? Here, I don't know what that's like being on time but also making time for the things that I really enjoy. Fuck, you guys are doing good, thank you. So my word for 2025 is time, time.
Speaker 10Ever fleeting.
Speaker 2And that's my theme song for the year. Mine's going to be a little bit of the same, kind of a repeat of book it. Well, of course I want that book it but getting auditions in earlier you've been talked about before. You've been better about that in the last couple months I've been better, but not there's last couple months I've been better, but not there's room for improvement.
Speaker 9Is there anything outside of the acting?
Speaker 2No, lose weight, and I know that is very cliche.
Speaker 9Will you tell the story of why you want?
Speaker 2to lose weight.
Speaker 13I need to work out.
Speaker 9Why you want to get healthy, why you want to get fit. Tell the story.
Speaker 3I thought I was going to say so he can always ensure that he can beat the shit out of me. No cause I would love to get fit, just to look at him and be like look, dude, you gotta realize it, I can fucking take ya, I'm saying that I can't do that now so maybe if I got swole swole, you would have no other choice but to just say here I'm throwing the white flag. That doesn't make you tougher. Well, no, I never said that he's your dad. Oh, I believe in dad strength.
Speaker 6I believe dad strength is a real thing, I think it's a very real thing.
Speaker 9I think Gunny can beat up your dad. I mean he does.
Speaker 2You don't even have to push him hard, just get him a little off balance Catch him on his shoulder.
Speaker 3Run around in circles. Every year he loses more balance. Well, now Every year.
Speaker 2Well now, okay, I'll tell you why I want to seriously get in better health and shape. Is God this is? It almost goes into like conspiracy land, but that's where you live. But, it's not You'll understand my apologies, so I was watching another podcast last week, the Sean Ryan Show.
Speaker 3Oh God, it creates too much anxiety and disdain for the government. I can't listen.
Speaker 2But there is a lady and I'm sorry I forget her name Sarah.
Speaker 3Sarah, yes.
Speaker 2Sarah Adams? I think yes, and she is. She knows too much she's involved with the intelligence community. She knows too much she's involved with the intelligence community. And she was talking about how Al Qaeda has taken a new role and they're more of a governing type of terrorist organization that is now working with the Taliban, isis, hamas, all these other ones. She talked about how they assisted in the planning of what happened in Israel. I forget the date of that. Was it October? Something I can't remember, something I can't remember, but anyway, what she further said was they believe there are at least a thousand of these members of this terrorist network in the us right now oh, I.
Speaker 5Yeah.
Speaker 2That they know they're planning something, and they don't know, though, if it's 2025, 2026. But there's going to be stuff that happens supposedly in Europe, attacking embassies, but also and they had a certain word for it, maybe they called it the homeland, or something like who knows what they're going to do that's still 20 terrorists that are looking to take out anything and everything they can. They will be fighting to the death. So you want to fight, and so be ready to fall. I just feel like I I need to be able to to do that, and I think it's. I need something to motivate me past this mental block I have with whether it's working out or whatever. Um, with all of my hernias, my knee I do have a mental block about working out that I'm going to.
Christmas Wishes and New Year's Resolutions
Speaker 2I'm going to hurt myself again, cause and I'm sure there's a lot of veterans that deal with this that when they start like a training program, there's a switch that flips and you just go hardcore into what you're doing and I'm afraid that switch is going to flip again and I'm going to do something. I'm going to hurt myself. So I need something else to motivate me.
Speaker 3And so fighting terrorists is how.
Speaker 8I'm going to get skinny Fear and conspiracy is going to get me Fight some people.
Speaker 2But I think it's something we have to be aware of.
Speaker 6And I think more than anything.
Speaker 2I think sometimes we don't pay attention to our surroundings enough, and that goes with everyday life. You know there's human trafficking. Even in the States is happening today.
Speaker 9Yeah, the signs are in our bathrooms.
Speaker 2And I just feel like a lot of people lose that their sense of their surroundings, knowing when something's off.
Speaker 9You sound like your mom, I know.
Speaker 2And I don't like that. Trust me, I don't like that.
Speaker 9Oh, Hunter's shaking his head at you right now.
Speaker 3But it's because I'm just weird and I don't know what to say.
Speaker 2I've been deployed I've been deployed to places where those kind of things happen, right where, where bad people do bad things to innocent people. So it does happen. It happens a lot of places around the world and we're not immune to that. So when's?
Speaker 3the stay frosty that's a fight let's say when's the laugh?
Speaker 9until we fart part of this I was about to say sorry guys, I really thought it was about aliens.
Speaker 3I forgot that it was about terrorists I know damn my dad's like I just want to stay in my driveway.
Speaker 9We're talking about aliens yeah because aliens live in the ocean oh man, I'm ready for a bug hunt.
Speaker 2I guess technically the terrorists are aliens in our country, I mean true.
Speaker 9Oh God, ew, but sorry to get serious. Oh my God, she started it, she started it Make a fart joke already, let's see now we watched enough videos.
Speaker 3But anyway, penis. I hope everybody has a wonderful christmas. Buy ammo, new year. Buy ammo, get chest rigs, get armor plates go on a walk, get your cardio.
Speaker 2Uh, smoke a cigarette. Watch your diet. Smoke a cigarette. Diet is the most important one we'll probably have ice cream after this, but it's not the new year yet yeah, and if you're gonna smoke a cigarette, smoke a light or no smoke a marlboro black, no cowboy killer that's
Speaker 3always a joke at work that I'll get done like digging out a structure or some shit like that and you know you're fucking sweat and you're like give me a water. Oh, it's time for smoke. Time for smoke you were just digging out like a fucking hole what about a cools?
Speaker 10or a new port.
Speaker 3Hells yeah, man no menthols around here, buddy okay, merry christmas, merry christmas happy holidays let's play them out with this song is it Geraldine?
Speaker 5Fuck my, fuck my, fuck my butt.
Speaker 4To the window, to the wall, till the sweat drops down my balls, until all these bitches crawl. Ah, skeet, skeet, god damn, getting crunk in the club. She's working. I'd like to see them, females, twerking, taking their clothes off, bucking naked. Atl, ho, don't disrespect it. Three, six, nine down, she finds Hoping she can suck it to me one more time. Bring your ass right over here, ho, and let me see you get low To the window, to the wall, till the sweat drops down my balls. Oh, by golly, skeet, skeet, motherfucker, got down.
Speaker 8To the window, to the wall, till the sweat drops down and falls, Until all the puppies crawl. Ah, sweet, sweet gosh darn.
Speaker 4Gattin' crunk in the club she's workin working. I like to see them, females, twerking, taking their clothes off, bucked and naked. Atl, ho, don't disrespect it. Three, six, nine down, she fine, hoping she can sock it to me one more time. Bring your ass right over here, ho, and let me see you get low. Thank you.
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