Overcoming Bullying and Building Healthy Relationships | Brooke DeBoer

Brooke DeBoer, author of "Living the Free Life" and a dedicated life coach, discusses the lifelong effects of bullying and emotional abuse. Brooke opens up about her own experiences with bullying from elementary school through high school, which led to threats and a paralyzing fear. Despite having supportive parents, the trauma stayed with her into adulthood, impacting her health and relationships.

Brooke shares her healing journey, emphasizing the importance of recognizing one's worth and not feeling the need to prove it to others. She discusses the trauma responses many adopt, such as workaholism and perfectionism, and the necessity of processing pain to move forward. Her book guides readers through this healing process, offering reflection questions and encouraging journaling to help individuals overcome their past and create their desired life.

The conversation delves into the significance of setting boundaries in relationships with friends, family, or romantic partners. Brooke stresses the importance of surrounding oneself with supportive people and learning to identify and let go of toxic relationships. She also highlights the power of coaching and counseling in helping individuals navigate their emotions and achieve their goals. Additionally, Brooke and her family are committed to giving back, with 10% of her book sales going toward a water project in a village in Africa.

How to contact:
https://thebrookedeboer.com/

Transcript

Have you dealt with bullying or emotional abuse

>> Tiffanie: Have you dealt with bullying or emotional abuse? And are you trying to overcome the scars of those so you can unlock your fullest potential to live the life of your dreams? Well, if that is your goal, you are in the right place. This is true Crime Connections. I'm Tiffanie, your host and joining me today is Brooke Debor. She is the author of Living the Free Life and is also a coach. So I want to thank you so much for being here, Brooke.

>> Brooke Deboer: Thank you so much for having me. It's such a pleasure to be here.


So it sounds like you dealt with a lot of bullying in school

>> Tiffanie: So it sounds like you dealt with a lot of bullying, I'm guessing in school.

>> Brooke Deboer: yeah. Basically I was bullied from the time I was in elementary school all the way through every stage of school and all the bullying was different. It depended on it, was mainly with peer groups and different things, mostly by girls. Cause you're pre. that's so nice of you. Thank you so much. Unfortunately, I think that happens and jealousy is an ugly thing and it tends to happen a lot, I think for females. I have three daughters, so I wrote a book recently. I became a Life coach in 2020 and started helping women. Started tuning in to what the needs were and found out that most of our needs are not that different. a lot of us have trauma, whether if it's from school, age, years or relationship stuff, or maybe even childhood things. And it incur. It inspired me to write the book that I released in July, which is called Living the Free Life. And it's all about overcoming bullying, abuse and then taking you through a process to get closer to living the life of your dreams. So, the bullying definitely was tough. Lots of different types of bullying, some threats of physical abuse, but it never turned into that for me in high school it ended up becoming a situation where I was, having death threats. Kids were calling and I was afraid to go to school and my parents had to have the police get involved and trace the calls and figure out who was doing it because it became very scary. You know, I didn't know if somebody was going to follow through on whatever these threats were. And it was fairly paralyzing there for a little bit. And then I ended up. It just really affected me over time and I didn't really know why. I didn't really receive any counseling or help or support for it. I had really loving parents and they helped me navigate it as best as they could. You know, by giving me love and support and helping me through the sad times. And I did have some good friends. So it's weird how we just develop this sort of survival instinct and we just put a tough exterior on. You know, some kids don't get through it that easily. I'm not saying I got through it easily because then it came back to haunt me later in my later life as a mom and wife and dealing with family life, I ended up having a health crisis later because I had stored up so much of the trauma in my nervous system and my response to it, to the broken heart, that's what I call it. I mean, let's call it for what it is. We're not meant to be mistreated or spoken to terribly or abused physically. And I think after so much of it, you just put a protective bubble around yourself. And some people do that by drinking drugs to sort of go into a numbing sort of place. Other people put a protective outer layer on and work all the time or develop perfectionistic tendencies. And for me, that was what I did. I tried to have a tough exterior and to say, I can do this by myself, I can get through this. And I just kept pushing, kept pushing to be accepted by people, to achieve, to accomplish things. And by the time I was, I would say between 30 and 40 years old, I had a health crash and my thyroid just completely tanked and I couldn't really do anything. My body wasn't functioning right. So I didn't seek help, I was forced to. And that's when the beginning of the change happened for me to try to learn a new way of being.

>> Tiffanie: It's so crazy how that stuff does. It stays with you forever until you deal with it. So many times we think, oh, we're, we're fine, we've moved on. Like that was 20 years ago. That's not gonna affect me wrong, right?

>> Brooke Deboer: Mm That's so true. And I think, I think we just have ways of like processing that seem like good things to do. Like you don't wanna be too dramatic or you don't wanna be a victim or. I mean, at least for me, I can only speak for myself. Cause I know there's lots of different ways to respond to trauma and, and you know, like I said, the suicide rate is way too high. And for me I just, I just, I really strove to achieve, to prove my worth rather than knowing my worth. And I think that was quite damaging, to be honest. And until I figured out that there was a difference, you don't have to prove your worth. You are already worthy. You are already. For me, I'm a, I'm a believer. I believe in God, so. Or, you know, I, I believe that we are all created with a divine purpose and God creates is the way we are and we're already good. We don't need to prove. Go out in the world and prove that to everybody. But when you've had abuse, bullying, other forms of mistreatment, it just works on your ability to know that worth. And if you don't get supportive people around you and you don't have healthy ways to process through it, it can be very damaging.

>> Tiffanie: What you just said spoke to me so much when you said you were constantly trying to prove your worth. And you know, I found myself doing the same thing. Like, I gotta show everyone that I am, this, I am that instead of just knowing that I am. And you know, keeping yourself busy, trying to be a perfectionist, all of that. Those are trauma responses.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah. And you know, I mentioned this in the last few podcasts. The other great book for anybody who's gone through trauma is by Jackson Mackenzie, and it's called Whole Again. I actually should probably reach out to this author because it was very impactful for me to read the book. But there is a list of all the trauma responses in there and I wish I had it sitting here right now. Cause I don't have them all memorized. I know for sure what mine was, which was just workaholism, you know, working, achieving, trying to be perfect, trying to be liked, you know, the people pleasing. So that's a very helpful book also. And I talk about these things in my book. I reference his book in my book. And I do take my readers through a process of healing. And I tell my story so that the reader will know they're not alone. And I think there's so much that we put on ourselves when we've gone through something. We don't want to deal with it because we have to then, admit that there is pain there. And then processing the pain is really difficult. But I give you reflection questions at the end of each chapter so that you can process through. And I encourage journaling. And I share my story and how I did it. And I share my pain because I want people to know it's possible to look at your pain, process through it and get to the other side so that you can free yourself to begin looking at creating the life that you want to live.


You talk in the book about what is a healthy relationship

And asking, treating people, I shouldn't even say Asking people to treat you a certain way. It's. We teach people how to treat us by what we accept. And if you know that you're worse, good treatment, you're worth loving treatment, you're worth a, healthy relationship. I also talk in the book about what is a healthy relationship, what isn't, you know, what is, what does a loving connection look like? And then once you know that, then you can take that and that can become your foundation to build upon. And you can say no to the ones who are not healthy and start telling people, I'm, not gonna put up with this. I didn't deserve to be treated like this, you know? Absolutely. Oh, my gosh.

>> Tiffanie: I wish, like, in my 20s, early 30s, I would have known better. I wish I would have known my worth and everything. Because the things that I allowed. And you're so right, people will treat us how we allow them to. If you keep putting up with it, why are they going to change? You know, so it's so important to really be able to identify those things and to say, no, this is not acceptable, and walk away. you're better off alone than dealing with any kind of abuse.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah. And I would like to say and encourage your viewers that there's so many good people out there in the world. But, and I've told my daughter this, when you keep allowing the mistreatment or the manipulation or whatever the negativity is, it could just be a bad fit. You know, like, some people are just not a fit for us in relationships. That doesn't mean they're a bad person or you're a bad person. But if it's not a harmonious connection, it's okay to just let it go. And it doesn't even have to be a contentious thing. Sometimes we have to get really firm and strong with people and stand up and, and say no and say it to their face. But sometimes we just shift what our boundaries are, whether by just, not being available to that person as much or putting, you know, getting clear with ourselves. What kind of boundaries do we need on this relationship? Like, if it's a family member that you can't avoid connecting with or you don't want to cut off a family member, you can put boundaries around it. Like, I even had to set up stuff with friends where, like, if I was going to be around a, somewhat, toxic person or somebody who didn't treat me well and I didn't have a choice that we'd set up funny things either, things to keep me laughing throughout the. Keep my energy good and, like, reminded that I have a support person at home who, like, or one of my friends one time set up, just go into a closet and call me and I'll give you some encouragement. You know, I don't recommend that for really toxic relationships that you can avoid, but if, you know, I mean, there's all kinds of strategies you can use to create boundaries for yourself once you start knowing that you're worthy of good treatment and you know what you want, and you start looking for reciprocal relationships rather than ones where you're giving all the energy and they're giving nothing back or they're giving you a lot of negativity or judgment or criticism or whatever, you know, so it's. It's a process, you know, so don't. I, Also, the other thing I would say is don't expect this to be an overnight fix, but begin doing the work as soon as possible so that. And you can move through it rather quickly if you follow the steps in the book. You know, also, I coach women, so. And again, I told you this was part of my inspiration for writing the book. So sometimes it's helpful to get an advocate if you have something really toxic. Obviously, counseling is always helpful for. And therapy is always helpful for just working through the emotions of becoming emotionally stable. And then a coach helps you take where you're at and helps you move to where you want to be by being an advocate. A, support for you, providing tools, brainstorming for how we can get you from point A to point B, creating an action plan based on your ultimate goal. That type of. And that could be with relationships, career, it could be with your family life, bucket list, items that you want to accomplish. You know, that can be for anything. So often it's helpful to get a coach. I had a coach for two years before I became a coach myself and saw the value in it and thought and knew after having that coaching that this is something I wanted to do, to pay it forward for others because it totally transformed my life.

>> Tiffanie: So don't you find, like, even me doing this podcast and talking to people, like, I'm literally going on this journey with my guests, with my listeners, and I. I find out new things about myself all the time. And I'm like, oh, my God, I can go ahead. And I can identify with that. And it's empowering to be like, see, I wasn't crazy. Because that's the one thing you always hear is you're crazy. And it's like, no, but I wasn't. And it validates you.

>> Brooke Deboer: I can't tell you how many times somebody I was dating or a friend told me that I was crazy when I was sharing my emotions. And I think this is a really big problem because we don't take time to acknowledge each other's feelings. And then people like myself and you, we end up stuffing our feelings or feeling like there's something wrong with us. And I think it's really, really important to get around people who take time to listen to your feelings. And once you have that. Like, for instance, when I met my husband, it was transformative for me. It took a little while to trust it to be honest, because he never made me feel judged. There were a few. You know, I had to share some of my past with him, and I was. There was a lot of shame there. And, you know. Cause I hadn't worked through it all the way yet. I hadn't written about my story or gone to counseling yet, really, when I met him. And he never made me feel like I was wrong or bad for things, choices that I had made. He always just accepted me for who I was, and he saw my heart and he listened and he cared and he treated me with love and respect. So I hope that my story can serve as hope for women, especially that are in relationships where they're not getting that kind of love and respect, because it is out there. But you have to. It's like a weeding the garden. You know, you have to. As you're dating or going through relationships, you have to love yourself enough to. To notice how somebody makes you feel. And if it's crappy, then it's okay to take, pull the wheeze and let it go. You know, I think sometimes people are.

>> Tiffanie: Like, so scared to be alone that they'd rather stay in hell. And it's like, no, you. You deserve so much better than that.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah, well, and I've always. I tell my daughters this all the time. You're creating space when you release a relationship that is toxic or negative to you and not reciprocal again, those are kind of my little. What is it? A tagline or words that I use when I'm talking with them or even my clients, even myself. when you release that, you're creating space for other people to walk into your life. So much of our energy is tied up in relationships that are unhealthy, that are sapping and sucking our energy dry because the, you know, for whatever reason, again, doesn't mean they're a bad person. It just means Maybe they have some work to do before they can be in relationship with you or anybody else. And a lot of people don't choose to do the work. So then you end up taking on the work of the other person and taking on their energy, which then prevents you from attracting the people that m. Match your energy. So the most important thing is to get your energy right, get your heart right, and then you're going to attract. I, really believe in this, the law of attraction. And I, I believe that when we're healthy and our energy is good and in a, ah, we're able to be grateful and joyful and passionate about what it is we're doing, we're going to attract people who are at that same level. But if we're in shame, fear, negativity, beating, ourselves up, for things of the past or whatever we do, and I think women do it especially a lot, we're going to attract somebody else that has that same energy. So it's important to do the work and not be afraid to be alone to do the work.


If you get help like counseling or that kind of support, then you'll start learning

But you don't have to be alone alone, because I can't tell you, I advocate with my clients. My kids get help. Every single one of my children and I feel we have a pretty healthy. I'm not a perfect mother, but we have a pretty healthy life. We have a mom and dad at home and a nice life, you know. But every single one of my girls has gotten counseling. I've gotten counseling. My husband and I have gotten marriage counseling to just sit and process and kind of work things through. I've received life coaching. All my kids have had some form of it too, because I know that it works and it's okay to ask for help. So you don't really have to be alone. You might be alone temporarily. Like you won't have the comfort of the other person in the relationship. But if you get help like counseling or that kind of support, then you'll start learning how to seek friendship and relationship connection that is healthy. And then you'll have it back, but in a healthier way so that you're free to be who you are. So, and I believe two people, I've learned this somewhere, I wish I could reference it. But 2/2 don't equal a whole, right? In relationships. So if two half people that are not whole and healed and know that they're whole and healed really will come together and create kind of a codependency because it's almost inevitable because you're just, you're looking to the other person to fill up whatever that half is. And so, and I think a lot of us do that and that fear of being alone kind of puts us in that situation, you know. But if you can imagine two whole people, like two circles coming together and joining, then it, it just makes a, better. Everything's better because you're just there to support and encourage each other to be more vibrant and shine brighter than developing a codependency where you're having to need each other. Do you know what I'm saying?

>> Tiffanie: Oh, a hundred percent. no one ever is going to fill your cup up for you. No, you have to do it yourself. And I want to say that even goes for friendships, especially when you are on this journey of self discovery and self improvement. You're going to realize you're going to outgrow some of your friends because they're not growing with you. And it's very important to see that and to know that that's okay. Don't stop your growth because your best friend might be your best friend for 30, 40 years, but if they're not where you need them to be, unfortunately they are holding you down. And it's sad, but it happens.

>> Brooke Deboer: And it can be very sad. I've had to mourn the loss of friendship and I'm getting better because I'm getting better at identifying the qualities I'm looking for early on so it doesn't get so deep or codependent, you know, and then having to cut the ties. I've had to do that a few times with female relationships and romantic relationships, but so I'm not going to downplay how hard that is to let go of somebody. It's like mourning the loss of somebody passing away because they were a big part of your life and there are memories there and there's fun. And with every negative relationship I've had or dysfunctional one, there's always been really funny or fun parts of that relationship that were hard to let go of. You know, it was hard to imagine not laughing with this person or doing the things that we love to do together. But at the end of the day, if it's pulling you down, you know, and your self esteem or self worth is being affected and you, you don't feel you have to hide part of yourself or not be fully who you are because maybe they'll be mad at you or whatever. I mean, for me it was a lot of jealousy, I think, type stuff, stuff and like, or control, like they would want to be the dominant one. And I Couldn't really say, when you find yourself editing yourself too much, you know, with somebody because you don't want to shine too bright because they might not like that, then I'd say get out. Because you just supposed to be exactly. Authentically bright, shiny, you like, we're meant to shine and there shouldn't be competition because in my mind, at least in my training and what my experience has been, I believe God creates us all uniquely and individually as a part of a grand master puzzle. And for me, that's my belief. That's not your belief. That's okay too. But I, just on a practical level, I believe there's enough room for everybody and we can all work together to help each other shine. And I hope that the work that I do helps women support other women because it's been real difficult for me to find supporters as I support others and disappointing, you know, and I'd like to see that change for women.

>> Tiffanie: Absolutely. We need to stand together. Like, you know, scrolling on social media, sometimes you'll see like those posts and it's like one woman should not put down another woman for doing the same thing. It's time that you, you lift them up with you. Like, there's enough out there for all of us to be doing what we're doing and still shine. Like, just because if person A is doing the same thing as person B doesn't mean that you have to put them down. Like, oh, let's lift each other up. Let's work as a team. Or you know, just encourage each other to keep going because everyone's going to have shitty days and you need that in life instead of people constantly trying to put you down.


At the end of your book, you have self reflection

And one thing that I love about your book is at the end you have self reflection. And I feel like that, that right there is probably right where it needs to be because I think that's empowering in itself. Because you read your whole chapter, then you're like, oh shit, let me, let me actually really think about this. And ah, that's, that's great.

>> Brooke Deboer: I think one of the best things we can do for each other too is ask each other questions. And not just surface questions. Not just like, what are you gonna wear when you go out tonight? Or whatever. But like, how are you doing really? How do you feel about that? You know, I have a best friend now and I feel like I've earned her because, I mean like, I've not allowed myself to be around really healthy people. And I actually very specifically m. I made A list of the friendships I wanted to attract. And I also looked at myself. Am I being that friend? And when she came into my life, I. It changed everything for me because we can have a conversation, and she will ask me real questions, and she'll stop me if we're moving too quickly through a topic to make sure she understands how I feel and helps me process through things. It's real conversation. It's like deep and good and authentic. And I've. I've always felt support and love from her. And so again, I'm gonna say there are these people out there, but it's important that you ask for it and you know that's what you're. You want and that it's. That is possible. Even when you've had a lot of really negative relationships or abuse or bullying, it's hard to believe. It's hard to trust anybody, number one. And number two, it's hard to believe that there are people out there like that. So.

>> Tiffanie: But I also feel like you attract it. Like, if you stay in negativity, what do you expect to get back? Like, you're gonna keep attracting more negativity now when you want more positivity and stuff like that, that's when more positive things start coming your way. You gotta switch your mind, your mindset. Yeah. Mind shift. Mindset.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah. And I think. Ask your. Asking yourself, like you said, with reflection. Like, when you go to spend time with a group of girls, let's say, or just a group of friends, it doesn't have to be just girls. Ask yourself after, how did that feel? Was I able to be myself? Was it a joyful experience? Did I feel like we were getting caught up into gossip or negativity, or there was weird energy, or did it feel like something I'd like to. To do again? I think a lot of us just are creatures of habit, and we. We hang out with the people that we've hung out with forever, too, because it's just what we know. And again, maybe afraid to be separate from the group or be alone. But if you're being honest with yourself and you're asking and you're clear about what it is that you truly want, and you're giving yourself the time and the space to envision what it is that you want and how you want to feel. You know, most of us don't do that. Like, a lot of us will put down a bucket list. You know, we'll say, I want to travel to Italy. I want to, like, learn how to play guitar. I want To, I don't know, whatever might be on. I want to jump out of an airplane and go skydiving. Whatever it is that's on your bucket list. That's fine. Those are all great experiences. But what about putting on your list? Like, I would like to attract reciprocal relationships, friends who truly support me and who, who are there to cheer me on when I'm trying to do something that I'm a little bit afraid to do or put myself out there. Somebody who will not judge me if I make a mistake and who will accept me back and forgive me. You know, I mean, whatever you're. Everybody has a little different requirement, but I'm pretty sure a lot of us would like those qualities in a friend. So it starts with knowing that you deserve it and then asking for it and, and then looking for those qualities and being honest. is that the crowd I'm with or do I need to make a, a change?

>> Tiffanie: But make sure you're being that person too, Beck.

>> Brooke Deboer: That's right.

>> Tiffanie: It's.

>> Brooke Deboer: That's a big one. Yeah. You're talking about attracting. If you're going to attract that, it's important to be that. So if you're looking to be, to have a, romantic relationship, you. It's great to write all the qualities of what you're looking for, not just looks. A lot of people stop there. There's like, oh, I want a tall, dark and handsome man or whatever it is. But good to put the qualities, but then also to go, okay, what kind of person would I need to be to attract that kind of person that I'm looking to have in my experience. So.

>> Tiffanie: Absolutely. And I'd also like to point out for people who are being bullied, there's usually a reason for that. The people who are bullying you hate themselves. They hate their lives. They're insecure, they're jealous, and there's something wrong with them. It's not you. So do not take what these people say as they mean anything, because they're, they don't. They're meaningless. They're doing it to hurt you on purpose to make themselves feel better.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah, it's interesting. I just read something yesterday and it was about that if you're being mistreated in some way, rather than taking it personally, recognize that this person does not have the tools. If they knew better, they would do better. Now that does not mean that you should stick around to put up with it, but it is, I think, easier if we can release the person and just. You're like, again, like I said, it doesn't have to be contentious. Sometimes we have to get tough and might even have to say some big words just to make the break. But like, you can release the person and just pray for them or send good light or energy, whatever your belief system is. You know, you can send love out to anybody, but you don't have to have them in your life.


If you're being bullied or abused, I firmly suggest that you reach out for help

And you don't have to take it personally either, because hurt people, hurt people. Ah.

>> Tiffanie: that's my motto. Yeah, it's true. It is so true. People don't know what to do with what they're feeling inside, so they project it. And sometimes in the most awful ways. You got the school shootings and, oh, my God, all this, all that is is hurt people reacting.

>> Brooke Deboer: So that's so. Yeah. And our world needs so much more love. So if. If you can. I, I. If you're being bullied or abused, I firmly suggest that you reach out for help and get out of that situation. And. But from afar, if you can do the work of forgiveness by releasing the person and knowing that they are a hurt person and that's why they do what they do, it doesn't mean you have to go be around them or do anything for them anymore. You'll be, I believe, you know, I pray through those to know what the next action steps are to take. Other, people may not pray or know how to do it that way, but you can. If you're in a safe place with safe, supportive people, you can release those people with love and hope that they get help, you know, but you don't need to be the help for them. Nope.

>> Tiffanie: You do not need to stand by and watch that train wreck. Don't do it.

>> Brooke Deboer: I tried to do that way too many times. I like, even I. I'll say it, I think I was playing God. I didn't know I was, but I was trying to be the one to, like, save them or help them or. I thought, you know, and that was. That was not right. What I needed to do is work on myself, what I could control, get the support that I needed and be that person, focus on the person I wanted to be and let that person do their work. Because everybody has to do their own work. They don't have to, but hopefully they choose to.

>> Tiffanie: Nobody can do that homework for you?

>> Brooke Deboer: No, not. Not at all. Well, if somebody wanted to work with.

>> Tiffanie: You, how would they find you from your website?

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah, you can DM me. Ah, @ Instagram. I'm at Freebrook. The word free And Brooke, that's my handle. Or you can go to my website, dbrookdeboer.com and there's a little form there you can fill out and send me a message. And then I. How I work is I like to meet people and talk with them on zoom or phone call first, tell them how I work, what the process looks like, find out what they need first, what their goals are and things like that. And then that way, if it's a fit, we move forward and work together. And I have lots of different ways, packages or single sessions or whatever. Also, the book is, you know, if coaching isn't affordable to you at this time, I'm happy to. The first call is free anyway. So, you know, but if coaching isn't affordable, the book really has a really good process in it. And if combined with the free guide that I offer on the website, just buying the book will help you get a great start at healing and getting to a place where you can start to begin to move forward. So. And the book's available on amp? Yeah, on Amazon right now. And I'm creating an audiobook. It's not quite ready, but I do have the ebook and paperback and hardback on Amazon.

>> Tiffanie: Go all with your VAT sales.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yeah. It's exciting.

>> Tiffanie: It is exciting. Absolutely. I'm going to make sure I put all links in the show notes. So anyone who is ready to take that next step, all they got to do is scroll on down and then they can click the link and find you.

>> Brooke Deboer: Thank you.


10% of the book sales are going to a water project in Africa

And one thing, if you don't mind me just adding something else. It's very exciting. My husband and I and my family again. I have three daughters. We went to Africa last year and the year before. We fell in love with the village there of people, amazing, joyful people, that need water. They don't have water. So 10% of the book sales are going to a water project. We've raised almost $80,000 so far. We're working with two nonprofits, one which will install the water system. it's spring fed and we're digging a trench. It's 6km. So it's the women and children that carry the water. They don't have great shoes. They walk on dirt and gravel roads where wild animals are. Very unsafe situation and very arduous and difficult in the heat and everything. They carry the heavy water 12 kilometers a day. So we want to help them. So we have organized a GoFundMe and 10% of the proceeds of the book also go to the project. Oh I love that.

>> Tiffanie: That is great.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yes.

>> Tiffanie: Anything to help other people, especially. Oh, that sounds horrible. Walking barefoot like that with all that water.

>> Brooke Deboer: they are so strong and so joyful. They were such an inspiration to me. I. I came back from there knowing that I could do way more than I thought I could before just by watching them. And I realized this is a situation. They don't have a choice, you know? So this is just what they do. It's part of their life. But my husband and I learned, so much that we wanted to give back when we came back from there, so. And our girls, too, so.

>> Tiffanie: I love that. I love it.

>> Brooke Deboer: Thank you.

>> Tiffanie: Good. It's got a purpose. All different ways.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yes. Well, we are very, very much into empowering people. Women and children specifically. But anybody. It'll make a happier world.

>> Tiffanie: So that's what we need.

>> Brooke Deboer: Yes.


It's never too late to change your life, Brooke says

All right.

>> Tiffanie: Well, I want to thank you so much for being here, Brooke. This was a pleasure. And I hope people got something out of this. It's never too late to change your life. Never.

>> Brooke Deboer: Right? Never too late. Thank you so much. It was my pleasure to be here today.