Answering Yourself

Looking for answers? You won't find them in your head. Find out more in this mini podcast from John Morgan.

Grasshopper Notes are the writings from America's Best Known Hypnotherapist John Morgan. His podcasts contain his most responded to essays and blog posts from the past two decades. 

Find the written versions of these podcasts on John's podcasting site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1628038

"The Grasshopper" is the part of you that whispers pearls of wisdom that  seem to pop into your mind from out of the blue. John's essays and blog posts are his interpretations of these "Nips of Nectar." Others have labeled his writings as timeless wisdom. 

Most of the John's writings revolve around self improvement and self help. They address topics like:

• Mindfulness
• Peace of mind
• Creativity
• How to stay in the present moment
• Spirituality
• Behavior improvement

And stories that transform you to a wider sense of awareness that presents more options. And isn't that what we all want, more options? 

John uploads these podcasts on a regular basis. So check back often to hear these podcasts heard around the world. Who wants to be the next person to change? 

Make sure to order a copy of John's new book: WISDOM OF THE GRASSHOPPER – 21 Days to Creativity. These mini-meditations take you inside where all your creative resources live. And you'll come out not only refreshed but recommitted to creating your future. 

It's only $16.95 and available at BLURB.COM at the link below. https://www.blurb.com/b/10239673-wisd...

Also, download John's FREE book INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. It's available at John's website  https://GrasshopperNotes.com

Transcript

Answering Yourself

I'm sure you know a person who answers a question the same way every time? “Did you get a haircut?” “Nope, got ’em all cut.” I’m sure that was funny the first time I heard it but now it has all the functionality of scented toilet paper.

Have you ever notice we seem to answer our own questions in the same way? We make a statement to ourselves or ask a question of ourselves and then we answer. The answer may not be the same words every time, like a worn out joke, but there is a patterned sameness about it.

I wonder if you can remember a time when you wanted to ask something of someone but never asked because you went to the land of make believe – inside your head – to have a conversation. It may have gone something like this: “I wonder if I should ask Sally to dance. She’ll never want to dance with me. She dances with all the boys on the football team and I’m in the poster club.” That’s called hallucinating.

You may have asked yourself: “Why am I so fat?" And your answer was, "because you eat like you have two assholes. You’ll never get thinner, so why even try?” This is a movie script that you’ve written and acted out so often, that the lines come to you automatically.

You may have a troublesome thought come back to you time after time. And each time, you give it the same response. What if you gave it no response at all?

Suppose your recurring thought is something like, “I’m not as good of a parent as I should be.” Notice that you'll fashion some sort of answer to that statement, and that answer will be almost identical to the answer you have given every time before. Then it turns into a full blown conversation inside your head with a predictable script. It’s like seeing yet another chase scene in an action movie. It does nothing for you.

What would happen if your answer to a recurring thought was nothing more than an observation? What if you just observed the thought without retort? You'd begin to end the war inside your head.

The next time you have a bothersome, recurring thought come to you (stimulus), choose this response: “I’m noticing I’m having the thought about being a bad parent.” That’s it – No beating yourself up about having the thought, no engaging in debate as to the accuracy of the thought, no denying the thought, no justification of the thought – Just pure observation in a factual manner. The minute you answer yourself, you engage in another battle that is winless and it leaves its carnage in your thoughts and feelings.

You have enough experience to know that your mind will bait you again. You now have a new way to respond – no response at all – just an observation.

The observation is most useful when you’re dispassionate like Sgt. Joe Friday in Dragnet – “Just the facts, ma’am.” If you say, “Damn it, I’m having the awful thought about being a bad parent again for the umpteenth time.” That’s not an observation but a condemnation. Leave the exasperation out of your observation.

The benefit to observing rather than answering is twofold:

1. The war stops.
2. The thought comes back less often.

This will take some training of your mind and the results are very peaceful.

Since I began this mini podcast with a tired, old joke, it only seems fitting to end with one.

One person tells their psychiatrist, “I must be crazy because I talk to myself.” The doctor says, “You’re only crazy if you answer yourself.”

All the best,

John