Paradoxical Communication

We communicate paradoxically when we say one thing and do another. Find out more about this paradox in this mini podcast.

Grasshopper Notes are the writings from America's Best Known Hypnotherapist John Morgan. His podcasts contain his most responded to essays and blog posts from the past two decades. 

Find the written versions of these podcasts on John's podcasting site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1628038

"The Grasshopper" is the part of you that whispers pearls of wisdom that  seem to pop into your mind from out of the blue. John's essays and blog posts are his interpretations of these "Nips of Nectar." Others have labeled his writings as timeless wisdom. 

Most of the John's writings revolve around self improvement and self help. They address topics like:

• Mindfulness
• Peace of mind
• Creativity
• How to stay in the present moment
• Spirituality
• Behavior improvement

And stories that transform you to a wider sense of awareness that presents more options. And isn't that what we all want, more options? 

John uploads these podcasts on a regular basis. So check back often to hear these podcasts heard around the world. Who wants to be the next person to change? 

Make sure to order a copy of John's new book: WISDOM OF THE GRASSHOPPER – 21 Days to Creativity. These mini-meditations take you inside where all your creative resources live. And you'll come out not only refreshed but recommitted to creating your future. 

It's only $16.95 and available at BLURB.COM at the link below. https://www.blurb.com/b/10239673-wisd...

Also, download John's FREE book INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. It's available at John's website  https://GrasshopperNotes.com

Transcript

Paradoxical Communication 

He was a Renaissance man – Gregory Bateson. And he left us with the concept of “Paradoxical Communication.” For lack of a more detailed explanation, think of someone saying, “Go left” when pointing right. Or as a young person you may have heard this gem: "Do as I say, not as I do."

We’re all really adept at paradoxical communication because we were taught very well by our early care givers. It seems many of us have bought into this fantasy: that we should be judged by our words rather than by our actions. That’s a paradox.

We can’t be taken seriously about our positions if we are standing in another position. If our own shoes hurt, why would we pass them on to someone we care about? Because we don’t realize we’re displaying paradoxical communication.

That’s why“Monkey see, monkey do” is more accurate than “Just do it.” 

The trick to outgrowing anything is to first notice that you're doing it. I can assure you we're all paradoxically communicating; it’s just a matter of degree.

How often do your actions not match up with your words? Do a personal inventory and you’ll be amazed at what you see. It’s like a visit to the attic you haven’t looked at in years.

The sadder news is that we pass on this trait. The ones we care about most are the victims of our fantasy, just as we were the unwitting recipients of a philosophy that looked good on paper, but won’t help us pass the test.

The test in life is getting results. Results are hard to come by when we participate in paradoxical communication.

A productive step to outgrowing paradoxical communication is to immediately stop being an expert on what we talk about, but don’t do. (Think of Oprah on losing weight and keeping it off).

Again, it takes recognition that we're involved in a paradox. Once noticed, we have a better chance of outgrowing a philosophy that keeps us, and those we pass it on to, stuck.

Start small. Just notice one pearl of wisdom that’s still in the oyster that you’re claiming as your own and give it up. 

It will lead you off the slippery road of paradoxical communication, which is loaded with good intentions, onto a road with traction that only leads to good deeds.

All the best,

John