The Intent Of Hurt

Did someone hurt your feelings just to spite you? If you believe that, you'll hang on to hurt for a long time, maybe a lifetime.

Grasshopper Notes are the writings from America's Best Known Hypnotherapist John Morgan. His podcasts contain his most responded to essays and blog posts from the past two decades. 

Find the written versions of these podcasts on John's podcasting site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1628038

"The Grasshopper" is the part of you that whispers pearls of wisdom that  seem to pop into your mind from out of the blue. John's essays and blog posts are his interpretations of these "Nips of Nectar." Others have labeled his writings as timeless wisdom. 

Most of the John's writings revolve around self improvement and self help. They address topics like:

• Mindfulness
• Peace of mind
• Creativity
• How to stay in the present moment
• Spirituality
• Behavior improvement

And stories that transform you to a wider sense of awareness that presents more options. And isn't that what we all want, more options? 

John uploads these podcasts on a regular basis. So check back often to hear these podcasts heard around the world. Who wants to be the next person to change? 

Make sure to order a copy of John's new book: WISDOM OF THE GRASSHOPPER – 21 Days to Creativity. These mini-meditations take you inside where all your creative resources live. And you'll come out not only refreshed but recommitted to creating your future. 

It's only $16.95 and available at BLURB.COM at the link below. https://www.blurb.com/b/10239673-wisd...

Also, download John's FREE book INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. It's available at John's website  https://GrasshopperNotes.com

Transcript

The Intent Of Hurt 

I was exploring some hurtful feelings some years ago when The Grasshopper offered this: “Hurt is your reaction, not someone else’s intent.”

The guy who flipped you off in traffic had no intent of hurting your feelings when he woke up that morning, but there you are attempting to assign your hurt away, to a stranger who’s driven away.

It’s OK that we hurt; it proves we’re human. It’s the next step that keeps hurt in place: making our hurt feelings someone else’s fault or intent.

Seriously, did your high school sweetheart break up with you just to hurt your feelings? They moved on for some other reason other than to spite you, but we may hang on to the notion that they purposely hurt us. 

Hurt needs your permission to linger, and one of the biggest permissions we give it is to make it someone else’s fault. We rarely take the time to own our hurt. It is ours but we attempt to convince ourselves that someone else holds the deed.

Assigning scapegoats can go on for a lifetime, if we let it. Better to notice that you’re hurting and feel that hurt without ascribing a reason for it. Reasoning takes you out of your body and into your head where we can concoct more stories about why we’re hurting and keep the cycle alive.

Stories are our attempt to go around the pain of hurt. There is only one way past hurt: to go through it. That means feeling it fully which leads to metabolization and helps it fade away.

Time doesn’t heal all wounds if you don’t accept ownership of them.

A stimulus may always exist: a date on the calendar, a photograph, a smell, a memory that just pops into mind, or any number of reminders. Our hurt reaction will diminish over time if we take the time to recognize our internal upset and give it the time of day. That means to feel it fully rather than attempt to chase it or ascribe it away.

Here’s a question worth exploring: What is your intent? Are you going to react to hurt and assign it away or will you own it and feel it and alleviate its sway?

All the best,

John