Let Yourself Be Upset

Upsets are the topic of this week's Grasshopper Notes essay from John Morgan for the week of May 19th.

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Transcript

Let Yourself Be Upset

Have you ever been upset when you had to do something you didn’t want to do? If you answered “no,” you’re not human. You must be AI. 

It’s pretty universal that feelings of upset accompany a task you don’t want to do?

If those feeling persist throughout the execution of this necessary action, you’ll prolong your project exponentially. Not only that, you’ll feel miserable the whole way through.

So let’s pretend you’re faced with an arduous duty. Let’s make it simple: you have to fold and stow multiple loads of laundry. Not glamorous. Not exciting. Definitely not fun.

Let’s further add, If you don’t do it, it won’t get done.

Now you’re pissed. “I could be out in my garden in the fresh air. Instead, I’m stuck in here surrounded by piles of socks and that weird chemical smell from dryer sheets.” The longer that internal drama goes on, the longer your angst will stay in place, and the longer your chore will take.

What to do?

Have your ranting moment. Let that part of you have its say. Don’t try to ignore it because it refuses to be ignored, and will loudly remain banging on your door.

That means to notice the upset. Most people don’t. They continue to stew about what they don’t want to do.

Say something like this to yourself instead: “I have upset feelings within me.” Notice the period after that sentence. Don’t add any cause to the upset like . . . “I’m upset because I have to fold this mountain of laundry.” That addition won’t subtract your distress.

Noticing and giving credence to those feelings will. Let that thunderstorm have its full say, and soon after brighter feelings will come your way. 

This doesn’t mean you’ll fall in love with folding piles of laundry. It means you won’t prolong your task by wallowing in dread, which makes your whole body feel like it’s dead.

Once your feelings are acknowledged and fully felt, then you can give your full focus to the project at hand, and do it in accelerated time, instead of being delayed by an unending whine.

Upsets are part of life. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to shorten its strife.

All the best,

John