From Conflict To Connection

How responding can change conflict into connection.

 Grasshopper Notes are the writings from America's Best Known Hypnotherapist John Morgan. His podcasts contain his most responded to essays and blog posts from the past two decades. 

Find the written versions of these podcasts on John's podcasting site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1628038

"The Grasshopper" is the part of you that whispers pearls of wisdom that  seem to pop into your mind from out of the blue. John's essays and blog posts are his interpretations of these "Nips of Nectar." Others have labeled his writings as timeless wisdom. 

Most of the John's writings revolve around self improvement and self help. They address topics like:

• Mindfulness
• Peace of mind
• Creativity
• How to stay in the present moment
• Spirituality
• Behavior improvement

And stories that transform you to a wider sense of awareness that presents more options. And isn't that what we all want, more options? 

John uploads these podcasts on a regular basis. So check back often to hear these podcasts heard around the world. Who wants to be the next person to change? 

Make sure to order a copy of John's new book: WISDOM OF THE GRASSHOPPER – 21 Days to Creativity. These mini-meditations take you inside where all your creative resources live. And you'll come out not only refreshed but recommitted to creating your future. 

It's only $16.95 and available at BLURB.COM at the link below. https://www.blurb.com/b/10239673-wisd...

Also, download John's FREE book INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. It's available at John's website  https://GrasshopperNotes.com

Transcript

From Conflict To Connection

One of the phrases I used in my seminars — and in my book INTER RUPTION — is this:

 “No creativity comes from a reaction. Only predictability.”

Now, don’t take my word for it. Test it.

Do you know someone whose reaction you can predict every single time?

If you’re married, you don’t even have to think about it. You know this fact intimately.

You say “X” . . . and like clockwork, they say “Y.”

Every time.

And here’s the kicker — you know this about them . . . and they know it about you.

It’s automatic. Conditioned. A reflex reaction to a familiar stimulus. It happens instantly . . . without thought.

Unless — and this is the turning point — you catch it.

Unless you notice your reaction before you robotically deliver it.

In that moment, you see something almost comical: your hand puppet is about to react to their hand puppet.

And you’re not even on the stage.

You’ve defaulted to one well-worn groove. It feels like the only possible way to respond — even though you know, intellectually, it’s tired. Predictable. Not working.

That’s when you need a creative intervention.

That’s when RESPONSE comes in to save the day.

When you feel that predictable reaction rising up, throw in the clutch. Interrupt what you’re about to say.

Just pause.

That interruption becomes a wedge between stimulus and reaction.

And in the space you create — something new can arise.

A response.

Viktor Frankl said it beautifully:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

That space? That’s the gold.

And if we’re being honest, don’t we all want to be the stimulus — not the predictable reaction?

It can happen.

But only when you choose a response instead.

When you pause long enough for something fresh to arise, you’ll surprise yourself. You won’t go down the same stale trail.

And here’s the bonus: when you interrupt your predictable behavior, you throw a monkey wrench into the exchange.

The other person feels it.

They notice something new is coming from you . . . and they respond differently.

Just like that, you’ve opened a new chapter in the conversation.

Freshness enters.

And instead of predictably engaging your wrath, you find yourself on a different path.

Does it take practice? Absolutely.

Reacting is easy. Responding takes awareness.

But if you want to run on a new track, this is how you lay it.

Pause.

Create space.

Choose.

All the best,
John