The Last Word

When you have the "last word," you often say nothing.

 Grasshopper Notes are the writings from America's Best Known Hypnotherapist John Morgan. His podcasts contain his most responded to essays and blog posts from the past two decades. 

Find the written versions of these podcasts on John's podcasting site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1628038

"The Grasshopper" is the part of you that whispers pearls of wisdom that  seem to pop into your mind from out of the blue. John's essays and blog posts are his interpretations of these "Nips of Nectar." Others have labeled his writings as timeless wisdom. 

Most of the John's writings revolve around self improvement and self help. They address topics like:

• Mindfulness
• Peace of mind
• Creativity
• How to stay in the present moment
• Spirituality
• Behavior improvement

And stories that transform you to a wider sense of awareness that presents more options. And isn't that what we all want, more options? 

John uploads these podcasts on a regular basis. So check back often to hear these podcasts heard around the world. Who wants to be the next person to change? 

Make sure to order a copy of John's new book: WISDOM OF THE GRASSHOPPER – 21 Days to Creativity. These mini-meditations take you inside where all your creative resources live. And you'll come out not only refreshed but recommitted to creating your future. 

It's only $16.95 and available at BLURB.COM at the link below. https://www.blurb.com/b/10239673-wisd...

Also, download John's FREE book INTER RUPTION: The Magic Key To Lasting Change. It's available at John's website  https://GrasshopperNotes.com

Transcript

The Last Word

How many times have we tried to squeeze in the last word? Just one more sentence . . . one more explanation . . . one more justification.

It rarely helps the communication. In fact, in my experience, when we do that, whatever we’re talking about suddenly becomes all about us . . . and the other person in the conversation gets dismissed. At that point it’s not about communication anymore — it’s about ego.

And unless you’re talking to a counselor, a conversation isn’t about you. It's about us.

When we’re solely intent on saying what we have to say, we usually force it into the exchange at exactly the wrong moment. We’re on our timetable, not a shared one. And that compulsive timing tends to deafen the other person . . . because, frankly, we’re throwing up in their ears.

One telltale sign of this is a long soliloquy filled with pap and platitudes — not much real substance — just a one-way defensive agenda.

In the law they call it a justification defense. That means you did what you were accused of . . . but you claim you were justified in doing it.

Ask any attorney you know.

It rarely works.And when we justify having the last word, all we really do is widen the chasm in the conversation. The gap gets bigger, and neither person can get to the other side.

We’ve all done it. But I’m not sure we’ve ever really stopped to notice that it almost never works.

So maybe take stock today. Notice how often the urge comes up to have the last word . . . and see if it actually gets in the way.

Years ago The Grasshopper said something to me that explains all of this . . .

“If you need to be heard and need the last word . . . your communication skills will suffer.”

Final thought: When you have the last word . . . you may end up saying nothing at all.

All the best,

John