Pink Money
Pink Money Podcast is a financial education show for LGBTQ+ listeners ready to take control of their money — and their future.
Hosted by Jerry Williams, a veteran financial professional and advocate, each episode delivers smart, practical guidance on budgeting, debt, investing, retirement, estate planning, taxes, and legacy-building.
💬 Real money talk — from a queer perspective.
⚠️ Disclaimer: The Pink Money Podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. It reflects personal opinions and experiences and does not constitute legal, financial, or investment advice. Always seek guidance from a qualified professional regarding your unique situation.
🎵 All music content is credited to the original creators. No copyright ownership is claimed.
© 2025 Jerry Williams | Pink Money Podcast. All rights reserved.
Pink Money
EPS 49 - Women’s Money Roundup: Lasso That Bull & Take Control
So many women are told “don’t worry, he’s taking care of it” — right up until the moment the money’s gone. In this episode, Jerry welcomes back his friend and longtime finance pro Grace for a candid conversation about why women so often feel intimidated around money and how to change that, starting today.
Jerry shares real-life stories: a woman inheriting $200,000 and unsure what to do next, another terrified her brother (with power of attorney) is draining their father’s accounts, and widows who find out after a death that survivor benefits or life insurance were never put in place. Grace adds her own experiences as a shy, non-confrontational woman learning to negotiate for a car, push back on high-commission products, and ask the hard questions advisors don’t always want to answer.
Together they break down red flags when choosing an advisor, what to ask about fees and credentials, why big firms can offer important safeguards, and why “If it’s a good deal today, it’ll still be a good deal tomorrow” is your new favorite line. Whether you’re carrying debt, just starting with $50/month, or managing a larger nest egg, this episode is all about helping women stop feeling scared, start interviewing advisors like a boss, and actively participate in the money decisions that shape their future.
Visit pinkmoneypodcast.com for companion posts and a checklist of smart questions to ask any financial advisor before you sign on the dotted line.
💬 Have a question or comment? Contact Jerry here
The following podcast is for entertainment and educational purposes only. Remember to seek competent tax, legal, and investment advice that is unique to your personal situation. Hey everybody, and welcome to the Pink Money Podcast. I'm your host, Jerry Williams, and we talk about all things related to money from a queer perspective. And today I brought on uh one of my friends who I think she's such a good person to bounce this kind of topic off of off of, which is today I'm gonna be talking about things that are related or specific to women. Doesn't mean anybody can't listen and pick something up, but I'm gonna kind of gear the conversation towards women. How you doing, Grace?
SPEAKER_00:Good. I'm so glad to be here with you.
SPEAKER_03:I'm thrilled that you're here. We haven't spoken for a little while. In fact, I think you know, the first episode that we did, period, was I think about two, maybe even three years ago. Does that sound about right?
SPEAKER_02:It was. Yeah, it was, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:It's been a long time. But you know what? The episodes that I think you did three with me that I can recall. But anyway, those seem to do particularly well. Out of all that I've done. Yeah, they they seem to get a lot of a lot of attention, especially the one that we did about credit. That seems to really do well. I don't I don't mean it must resonate, obviously, with people or otherwise they wouldn't listen. But you know.
SPEAKER_00:Right. That's a big that's a big important topic.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and speaking of of uh back episodes before I forget, if anybody listening wants to go check out back episodes, you can go to the website at www.pinkmoneypodcast, all one word dot com. And then you can go to the website, you can check out the whole entire episode list that goes back there, you know, since the beginning, and you can listen to all of them, some of them, whatever attracts your attention. But there's also stuff on the website that I'm just gonna plug right now, like companion posts that I put up, which are, you know, if I forget something in an episode or I want to talk more about it, then I'll post a companion post and you can find that link. And there's also a lot of other different tabs that you can go on there and check out. So anyway, there's my plug for my website. So check it out. And there's one last thing before I forget as well. There is a new card that I created called a show card. I call it a show card, but you can email it, text it. You know, it has a QR code on it. So if you want to share the podcast with someone, you can do any of those things. Or like I said, I'm not exactly how sure how the QR codes work, but I guess you just take a picture of it with your phone, and I guess you can share it that way. But anyway, it's on there, and you can find that on the about section of the website. So that's that. Anyway, Grace, the reason I wanted to do this particular podcast is I have run into a few people recently, particularly women, like I mentioned, and I've listened to their stories and it's actually bothered me. Bothered me in the sense that I feel like they are very intimidated by handling their own money and being able to direct their own money the way that they see fit. And what I mean by that is I talked to a woman probably in her, I'll say 40s, and then I spoke to another lady, and she was probably, I'll say, in her 70s. So both of them had different stories. In one, the younger one had just inherited, I think, around$200,000, and she wanted to get advice on not from me particularly, but she wanted to get advice on how to invest that money, and she was even thinking about using part of it to open a hair salon. And then the older lady, we were just we struck up a spontaneous conversation, and she was telling me about how she moved over here to Austin, and she moved here because her daughter and her grandchildren were here. But her story really was that her father was very, very ill, and her brother was handling the father's finances, and he was the power of attorney for the dad, and she was very worried that he was gonna mishandle the money from her father, and so she was concerned about him having all that power and her being so far away and not really being able to do much about it. And it sounded like obviously there's a little bit of trust issues there, but then she went on to tell me even more that her husband passed away and her brother-in-law, her brother-in-law took advantage of her. I'm not even sure if it was her ex-husband or husband, but anyway, when he he died, that he took all of our money. And so she was basically left with nothing. I mean, she's on social security, that's how I that's what I took from it. And like I said, now she's facing losing the inheritance from her dad. So both of those are, you know, to me different, obviously different stories, but different situations that really require somebody who's really got your best interests at heart. And I think, like I said, women in particular get taken advantage of. And I don't, you know, I you you and I have both seen that, right? I mean, you've you've seen that plenty of times, I'm sure.
SPEAKER_00:You know, I I was just as you were telling this story, I was thinking about this is kind of off topic, but you remember when I bought my Camaro and I was so excited, but I was so nervous because it's my first big purchase, the first new car I'm buying. Yeah. And I went to the first dealer and they were kind of, I don't know, the guy let me sit there by myself for like two hours and I ended up not buying the car. And I went to the next dealer and I literally sat in the car for like 10 minutes, looking myself in the mirror, saying, You got this, they're just guys, they can't eat you, you can handle this. And I think about the same way when with so many with just not with finances, but with everything that we face, the intimidation when when we don't know what we're getting into, or the sales pitch that we might have that they might, you know, we might get taken advantage of because of that pitch that we're not prepared for, or that maybe we're inadequate in the knowledge of what we're looking at and how overwhelming it can be. And so yeah, I think all of those things start to come into play in any scenario. But just like you were talking about with especially the one whose brother-in-law is taking advantage of or how horrible.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, but you know, what what do you do? You know, really what do you do? Because, you know, I was thinking, if what would I do if I was in that situation? And I was thinking, well, you know, she could probably call adult protective services and report not necessarily abuse per se, but you know, maybe report the situation and say, I'm worried about him uh mismanaging my father's money because he's incapacitated or unable to do it, you know, whatever the situation is. That may be a way for them to step in and be a third party and go, hey, what are you doing? You know, why are you moving money and taking money out? And where did this money go? That could be that could be one way, you know, not saying that's the best way, but it's a way, you know. I don't know.
SPEAKER_00:I think it'd be the only way that you could get somebody legally involved to be able to handle it because otherwise you're going to court and it's probably going to be too late by the time that you do. So to have someone with the adult protective services, I think that's a a great starting point.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. And you know, the other thing I asked her was, does he have a will? And she said, you know, he doesn't. And she's I can't remember why she told me he didn't, but it doesn't matter. He doesn't. So I told her, you know, there are laws that distribute assets a certain way, and when he passes away, if the brother is the executor of the estate, you know, he has to go get letters of testamentary and he has to, depending on the size of the estate, you know, go through probate court. So there will be somebody overseeing the distribution of the assets, but that still doesn't guarantee that he hasn't spent them, hid them, whatever.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Exactly. So he has access to it now while the dad is still living. He could dwindle it or move it any way he wants to because he has all the control over that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:There's also no way for her to know if he sets up things like POD or TOD, the payable on death, they're transferable on death, yeah. To transfer it to himself outside of a will where a will wouldn't even be relevant. There's no way for her to know any of that.
SPEAKER_03:And and you know, who who's to say if he doesn't forge the dad's signature? You know, could happen.
SPEAKER_00:That's true too. That's true.
SPEAKER_03:You know, I mean, are they really looking? Because, you know, when I think back on, you know, working inside of the business, as I'll say, sounds like show business. I mean, like, you know, the financial business. Um, you know, they're overwhelmed. They're not overwhelmed, that's not the right word, but they've got thousands of things that they're handling on a day in, day out basis. And they try to dot their I's, cross their T's, and be as careful as they can. But, you know, they really don't know what's exactly happening because these people aren't sitting right in front of them, right? So you can't really look them in the eye and you know get a feel for are they, you know, are they doing the right things? Because anybody can call into any financial services company and say, hey, you know, I need these forms for this reason, and they send out the forms, they complete the forms and they send them back and they're signed and everything, and then they act on them. You know, so they don't know who really, really signed it. They weren't there, they didn't see it. And I'm not saying that people are all that shady, but there are a lot of shady things. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And and let's face it, anytime we're dealing with someone else's money, you know, we always talk about how weddings and funerals bring out the crazy in people. So people have all these good intentions, but then as soon as someone passes away, the greed sets in. So also does you know, it matters if this gentleman has power of attorney, if he even has access and control, and then to what extent.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, right. Exactly. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Because it may already be legally set up for him to do that. If it wasn't, then that means somehow he was able to obtain that.
SPEAKER_03:Right. You know, when when my mom, you know, she has dementia and she's 86 now, but a few years back, you know, when I realized things were progressing faster than you know I expected, I made sure that all of her financial estate planning documents were all set up. And including her hesitancy to do a will. And I said, Mom, you know, you have to do it because it's it's that important that the distribution of your assets goes the way that you want. So I literally had to take her to an estate planning attorney and make sure that it was done. Her kind of kicking and screaming, in the sense that a lot of people are very hesitant to do those documents for whatever reasons. You know, they think it it's gonna, you know, hasten their demise, or they just don't want to think about, you know, if I'm not here, how thing it doesn't matter. But I may I had to take that extra step. And it reminds me of getting this lady, and I said, you may have to sort of, I don't want to use the word force, but you know, force dad to do it, you know, because you need to do it. And then even if there is a will that's created, you don't have access to it, right? Maybe it's in a safety deposit box, or you know, the brother-in-law takes it and he hides it, tears it up, whatever. So there has to be like a copy that you have, she, you know, this lady has, or you know, if this person is important to you. And it doesn't mean that that will cannot be overridden by a new one. But it they again they would have to produce a new one. But nevertheless, my whole point is that if it's important to you, then you need to make it important to them. And especially if we're talking about a large amount of money, let's say, you know, a few million or even a million, you know, whatever is important to you. I would say, you know, you need to sort of level with that person, and if you can't get them to do it by them just you telling them, there has to be somebody who has a level of influence maybe over them, and especially do it before they don't they lose their competence, and then that writing of that will just really then didn't do anything because you know they weren't competent to sign it.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And and as we mentioned earlier, not just the will but the other documents, because you can set something up through your bank and it never even goes through the will. But you know, this is something that we hear about all the time with there was a I can't remember the Anna Nicole Smith, was that her name who married the Yeah, the m the old gentleman with lots and lots of money. And of course there that whole thing, the estate wasn't set up the way it should, and there was a fight between the family. So this is something that you hear about often. The unfortunate part is if you're dealing with a lesser amount, then being able to find someone who's going to assist you and take the the things that you have into consideration, I think becomes difficult. So maybe it's the the cost factor, maybe it's the not knowing what to ask, but it becomes a really big deal.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. You know, when I was talking about the the the girl, like I said, who inherited the 200 grand, she even had some, I guess there was some rocky relationships between her and her siblings, and I'm not even sure she got the full amount that she was expecting, but she's lucky she got what she got. I mean 200 grand is still hundred two hundred grand, but sure who knows, you know, again, if there's an executor handle handling the estate and you're not around, who knows what happens to all that, you know, money and the assets that belong to the the estate, you know, who knows? You know, it they could do anything with them. But anyway, um my point that I was trying to tell her and the other lady as well is it really behooves you to speak with somebody who is knowledgeable about these things and getting, and I say say this a lot, but getting a good financial advisor and a good attorney, you know, specific attorney, whatever you need, let's say real estate or estate planning or what have you, you know, is really kind of worth their weight in gold. And you you kind of get what you pay for, but it doesn't mean people are bad if they're quote unquote free, but you just have to realize that, especially if this person's giving you free advice, are they doing it out of the goodness of their heart or because they have some sort of financial interest in you know helping you? You know, and I say like when I talk about going to an investment advisor, and if the first question they ask you is how much money are we talking about, you know, that might be a red flag to me that maybe that person's not really looking out for your best interest, but their best interests.
SPEAKER_00:Exactly. And I think both of us, just from our history, we know that there's different ways that people will make money in this business. And and I'm I think that's great. I'm I'm all for people making money, all for people getting their commission. No problem with that whatsoever. But I do think it's so important that people are with someone they trust because the commission game, especially with insurance products, can be so rewarding for the person selling them and not always in the best interest of the person buying the product. So I think you're absolutely right when the first thing they talk about is money, how large is your estate, what type of investment assets are we talking about, how much coverage do you need? Those are some of the red flags for the cost of what you're gonna be paying them.
SPEAKER_03:And another thing too, like when you said about your vehicle, you know, buying that car. Now, I mean, I know, like you said, everybody's gotta eat, right? But when you go to your doctor, and I say this about this podcast specifically, because people will say, well, what makes money gay? And I'm like, nothing. Nothing makes money gay. It's green, it's green, right? It then nothing's gonna change that. Even if you paint rainbows on it, it makes no difference. You know, it's money. But what is different is how you receive that information, and is it from a trusted source, and is it from somebody who you basically see eye to eye with? So my point being is if you're a woman and you feel intimidated by men and you'd rather work with a woman, ask for one.
SPEAKER_02:There you go.
SPEAKER_03:I mean, just say, hey, uh, you know, I it's not that I dislike you, I don't know you, nothing personal, but is there a woman that has that I would be able to speak to? You know, just like if you go to the doctor, I mean you can choose your choice of you know, physicians or gynecologists or whatever. Pick a woman. I my mom did at all times. She was like, I don't want to go to a man. I'm like, well, go to whoever you like, you know.
SPEAKER_00:Exactly. Just like you said with medical, also, I mean, even when I go to get a massage, the same way. Okay, what do you prefer? It's okay to have a preference, that's all right.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, it all depends on you how you say it. You don't want to be a jerk about it, like, oh, you know, you're a man, I don't like you, you know. You know what I'm saying? There's a will, there's a way, but I'm just saying, yeah, ask for what you want and don't go into that feeling super intimidated because again, it's your money, you know. And you can obviously you can be taken advantage of by a woman as well. But you know, that once you pick that woman, let's say, you still need to do your due diligence and find out and ask the right questions about this person. What is your background like, what's your education like, what kind of clients do you typically help, etc. etc. You know, ask. There's nothing wrong with that.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, you're do do your interview. You're still interviewing them, they're doing you a service. They're you're the one getting the service from them. So they need to fit your criteria, answer your questions, and the moment that you get any pushback or any kind of feeling as if you're bothering them or wasting their time, then let them go. There's there are plenty of people out there that can help you with the different financial goals you're working on.
SPEAKER_03:Right, right. And you know, I remember plenty of times when it didn't happen a lot, but there would be people who you would speak with sometimes and they would ask for, especially, you know, when I first started, people thought, well, this guy sounds really young, you know. And they would say, you know, do you have someone who has a little bit more experience? And I'd say, yeah, you know, but if you want, you know, I can ask you some questions and see if I'm able to help you out if you feel that I'm not doing a good job or you know, not able to get your trust, then sure, I could put you in touch with someone else, you know. That never hurt my feelings at all. I didn't take it. You know, it is what it is.
SPEAKER_00:Do you I figure it's it's just the way that it goes. People with in the especially in the financial business, we expect what I was told was once you have a little bit more of this, and the gentleman post pointed to his gray hair, then your business will come. And I thought, you know, it's it's one of those things that people trust, people who have more experience in the business. Yes. But I also think it also depends on who you know that's doing business. You know, in the sales world, we refer we rely on referrals so often because it's the word of mouth is the best, right?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But I think you can also trust if you know that you know your girlfriend went to this person and was able to get the comfort and the help and the results that they were looking for, then it makes you more comfortable there. So using your community and your network that way is is also beneficial.
SPEAKER_03:For sure, 100%. Because their experience, you know, I hate to say it's kind of like um Yelp, etc. You know, it's not that you have to take it verbatim, but if they've posted all these negative reviews, I think that would be a warning sign to me. So if you're going up to people and they say, steer clear of this, you know, guy, he's you didn't do me good, then I would probably take that to heart and move along.
SPEAKER_02:Definitely.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and you know, it reminds me that even just yesterday, okay. So I was speaking with a friend of mine who called me and told me I that a friend that we used to work with years and years and years ago, she passed away, and it was very unfortunate. Her daughter couldn't hadn't spoken with her mom and wouldn't house, and her mom was lying there on the floor, and you know, just terrible. But anyway, the point I was making is so he called me and we had that conversation, and then we just continued talking because we hadn't spoken to each other for a while, and he told me that he was gonna be retiring in March and he was gonna be rolling over like$380,000. So, you know, a fairly good-sized chunk of change, right? And he told me that a friend of his referred him or told him, you know, go see this guy, he's really good. And I thought, well, you know, that's a good recommendation, right? But I said, if you'd like, I could take a look at him as well, and it's not and I can give you my opinion. And it's not that I'm, you know, the be all end-all, but I'm just saying there are certain things that I would look for. And so he gave me the name and gave me the name of the firm, and I went and I checked him out through like broker check, and I also read his form ADV, which details really the whole mechanics of the operation and how they charge their fees, etc. And then I gave him my opinion. And when I really told him, I said, there's nothing that really stands out overall and says steer clear of this guy, because he didn't have any violations against him or anything. But what I did look at is the size of the firm and the size of the assets, and they had probably about 700 million, I think, that they were overseeing. But not again, good or bad, it just is what it is. But there were only 10 people working in that firm. That was a big red flag to me. And the principal, the CEO, he had only a series 63. Again, not anything that's bad, right? But when I looked further, he had a real estate broker's license and he had his insurance license. And I was wondering, where's your investment license? Right. And that was also something that stood out to me. Again, doesn't mean that this is a bad person, does not mean that at all. It just meant to me, what did have you been through this whole thing of what are your credentials, right? You know, what do you have a series seven? Have you ever had a series seven? You know, have you worked in this industry? How are you giving advice and guidance to people? You know, if you're managing their money and you're taking a look and you're building a financial investment plan, how are you doing it? And the other thing that stood out to me was this man had been in the business since the late 90s, so that means he probably had to be in his good 60s, 70s, probably. And I thought you're probably not gonna be speaking to this man directly, and even if you are, you're probably not gonna get his full attention even with$380,000. You know, he's and I also looked at he had multiple financial firms that in different different states. And I thought, how are you able to manage all these different firms and you're doing it with just 10 people and you're overseeing$800 million, whatever, and then someone comes to you with this amount of money, and they give you, you know, I'm I want to roll this money over. I'm just saying you're not gonna get that man's attention, okay? No, you're just not. And there again, it's not saying he's a bad person, not at all, or that's a bad firm, not at all. I'm saying this may not be the right firm for you. That's what I'm saying. Plus, when I looked at the fees, it was fees on top of fees on top of fees.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my goodness.
SPEAKER_03:And that was right there in the ADV, right there. I just looked at it and I copied all this stuff and I gave it to him and I bullet pointed, you know, my thoughts. But I just said, hey man, what I would recommend is you check out other people and other firms. And his custodian was Charles Schwab. And I'm this sounds like a commercial. I'm not trying to sound like a commercial, but I said, if he's using Charles Schwab, why don't you just go directly to Charles Schwab? Go to the source. You know, what's the point of having somebody layer fees on top of fees when you can go directly to the horse and jump on? Right. Anyway, that's my thoughts.
SPEAKER_00:That happens so many times. And especially with that amount of money, it's a big amount of money, but it's not the amount of money that's making them their their greatest commission. And so they they get you in the door, and then a couple years go by and you somebody asks you what's happening with your investments, and you don't know, you haven't heard from them, and you haven't had the annual review like you should, and you just kind of get left on the wayside. So it's a very big deal to look at all those details and see how much attention and what the expectations are for you.
SPEAKER_03:Well, and I want to say they had about 2,000 clients roughly, and about 400 of them were characterized as high net worth. So you know out of that 2,000 people, only those high net worth people are really getting the the time and attention of those people. They're right. The rest of them are not. There's no way that 10 people can do an annual review on 2,000 people. Not happening. Not happening.
SPEAKER_00:And I even know this from my one of my very, very first jobs. We won't say the name, but we learned an 18-page script, and I had a financial degree, but some of the coworkers, one of them was a she was getting a degree for a vet tech, so nothing even to do with money. We learned this script, and then we go out and fill the script to people, and we just try to accumulate assets and of course sell lots of life insurance the whole life because it pays more and anyway or index life, I should have said, 'cause it it pays better commission. And so by the end of my six months there, I thought, I'm not doing financial planning. I am just doing sales and accumulation, and I don't feel like people are getting better for what we're providing. So it's a it's a huge thing in the industry that you and I have the experience of seeing on the back end of how people are actually taking care of once they get in the door versus the sales it takes to get them there.
SPEAKER_03:Well, you know, I remember when we had a I had a book of about 300 clients. And that doesn't sound like a lot, right? But when you're expected to have an annual review of even 300 people, there are only 365 days in the year. And you've got a you've got a lot of things to do. It doesn't sound like it would be that difficult, but it it is. It is hard.
SPEAKER_00:You know, there's a lot that should go into it.
SPEAKER_03:Exactly. And so, you know, I all I'm saying is if you're looking to speak to someone on a regular basis or at least once a year, that's not gonna be the person, you know, with ten people on board. It's not.
SPEAKER_00:So the other thing you mentioned was all the additional fees. And so once again, I'm I'm not opposed to fees. I think it's important that everybody gets paid, but there are certain fees that are going to be added on, and then certain ones that are gonna go above and beyond and don't really become necessary. So knowing the different level of fees, knowing that the different category of fees, I think that's important too, to know what you're what you can expect based on the fee that you're paying.
SPEAKER_03:Right. Yeah, and you know, one thing that I will say, and I don't know, I use Chat GPT for a lot of things. I just adore it. I really, really do. I ask it such crazy questions. You know, I was talking to it yesterday. I don't even know if you call it talking to it, but I do. And I'm asking it how, you know, how do how did people speak, you know, what did they sound like in the early 1900s? Why? I don't know. It just said they wanted to know, and I said, tell me how they spoke. You know, did they have an accent or you know, did they use the same type of uh sentence structure that we do today? I don't even know. But anyway, I have the craziest conversations with it, but that's okay because they're not gonna judge me, and I'm not embarrassed. I'm no one's gonna see it or hear it till I tell someone, tell everybody I'm asking questions like that. But my point really is you could take if you go to broker check, like I said, and you look at their form ADV and it doesn't mean anything to you, copy that damn thing and throw it into J J chat GPT, ask it to summarize it for you. Say if I have in I know they can't 100% do it. Let's say you you're like, I'm gonna roll over 380,000 to this place. You know, what kind of fees am I gonna look at? They don't really know because they don't know what kind of portfolio is gonna be constructed for you. But my point is that they could summarize for you. In everyday language, the type of fees that you could expect. And that's where again when I looked at it, I saw you're going to have fees from the investment products over there at Schwab, okay, that you're not necessarily going to see. There's not like they're going to send you a bill, but there's those underlying fees, the expenses that keep these funds running. And again, it depends on what they put you into. But then you're going to have the management fees on top of it from this firm. And typically it's you know from one to two percent. The higher you go to two percent, then the obviously the lot more you're paying. But you know, there are certain structures that can be structures. That's not what I really meant. But there are certain investments that you could get into that are very, very low cost or even quote unquote no cost. But that really you have to really work with somebody who knows what they're doing. And if you get to somebody that's not working on commission and strictly receives a salary, they could put you into some of these products that are going to be very beneficial to you in terms of keeping more money in your pocket. So like you just said, everybody's got to eat, but that doesn't mean you have to feed that bear. You know, there's a lot of different ways to go about it, but you really want to ask when you're talking with whomever you're this is uh the advisor, how do you get paid? And then can you put me in a very low-cost fee structure? Because I want to pay the least amount of fees possible. You gotta ask for what you want, and it doesn't hurt to ask.
SPEAKER_00:It does not, and I think that how you get paid is one of the best questions. And I'm with you. I use ChatGPT, I think it's my my new bestie, unfortunately, sad to admit. But you can also ask it for questions to ask, right? So I had I had a friend who she's almost at retirement, she's got a very large sum in her retirement account, and some company had come in to speak with their team, and they had offered, of course, to roll over a portion of this, and there weren't going to be any fees, and and this it's just sending red flags, alarm bells everywhere for me. So I tell her, ask this and ask this, and I said, and ask them if if I can fit in on the call with you next time you're gonna go.
SPEAKER_02:There you go.
SPEAKER_00:And they didn't like that. Absolutely for some reason that they were not happy about that, and then all of a sudden, oh yeah, we we do charge fees, and oh yeah, oh the offer. And I thought this is really sad. It makes me sad for her because she didn't know she's not a finance person, she doesn't know, she doesn't know what she doesn't know. That's what you and I do, right? Right. Just luckily that she had reached out, but you've you've got to ask the questions of of how you get paid, ask Chat GPT, what other questions am I needing to know? What other things do I need to ask? What do I need to look for? Because being aware is really how you're gonna make the best decisions.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and you know, there's so many different titles that advisors have, right? They could be planners, CFPs, they could be, you know, investment reps. There's a million different titles that they have, you know, coaches, etc. I don't know. You know, it's it's difficult to really ascertain sometimes what kind of person you're actually speaking with if you don't know. When you say lawyer, pretty much you know what a lawyer does, right? But then they're they're divided. You know, I don't do this, I only do corporate law, I only do, you know, family law, la la la la la. You know, just doctors the same thing, right? But financial, I'd say advisors kind of have that same similar setup. You don't really, really know what their specialty is by just grabbing their title, but sometimes it can be helpful, you know, it depends.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Well, and even with the word advisor, I'm not sure that there's any kind of requirement that goes into that. I don't personally watch TikTok, but I see some of the videos through other streaming themes, and there seem to be a lot of TikTok financial advisors who, in my opinion, are giving awful advice. Every once in a while it's good stuff, but that word advisor sounds like they're knowledgeable, but it doesn't mean that they have any kind of ability, experience, or actual education to be able to give the advice that they're giving.
SPEAKER_03:Absolutely. And like I said earlier, you have every right to ask. You know, you should be asking what is your experience, what is your education, what type of licensing do you have? You know, do your interview, do your due diligence. That's a whole five, ten minute conversation that may teach you a whole lot. A whole lot. And like I said, if you're a woman, a woman or a man, but especially, you know, women, in the sense that I think about situations where when I worked a lot with military families and military wives, and very often they would say, I handle all the day-to-day, you know, a pain of the bills, etc. But my husband handles all the investments. Or he's deployed right now, so I handle everything. But once he's back, he takes control. Or older ladies, I've never handled this before. My husband did all this. Right. You know, those are plenty of situations where, in my opinion, women are setting themselves up, you know, for failure because you're not involved in something that you really should be involved in. And again, you shouldn't be intimidated by anybody, even if it's your husband, you know, or what have you, your spouse. You know, you should be able to get in there and do it and not not be able to feel excluded because it's really going to hurt you when you don't know these things and you're not paying attention and the money is mismanaged. And like we said earlier, then it's too late. You know, you really need to get in there and keep the boat on the right track.
SPEAKER_00:Uh two different and and especially if if you're married, your spouse should want you to have a better understanding. You know, from just like you mentioned, your friend just passed away. You know, my friend passed away a few months ago. It can happen at any point in time. We know that we know that life can end at any point in time. So it's not even something we need to think about just for the elderly. It's something we just need to be able to have a handle on. So from the absolute basic of knowing your credit, knowing your budget and where your money goes, knowing what your debt looks like, knowing what types of assets you have investment-wise, whether it's stocks or mutual funds or bonds, knowing the value of your house, and then knowing what the plan is in the event that one of you were to pass away, or hopefully not, and in the event of retirement. So just being able to have all of that and have a clear understanding of that will help you to be able to move and navigate what you need to. But every piece of that is important to be able to understand.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, that's you're 100% right. And you just reminded me of a situation. I remember sitting down with this married couple, and we were, you know, time we were doing a whole overview of everything, right? That they had and all that. And one of the recommendations that I made, based on the interview, because we got it, we got down in the weeds, like, you know, who works and you know what kind of job you have and how long does it last, you know, all those things. And anyway, I made a recommendation to this couple of a total amount of insurance that they needed to carry on the husband. And I could see in his face immediately, he was like, No way, no way, I'm not doing it. And I kind of turned to the towards the wife, and she just was like looking at me, kind of giving him side eye, and she didn't say anything. And in my mind, I'm thinking, if I'm in your shoes and I heard what I just heard, I would say, listen up, buddy, we're signing that application right here, right now, because you kick off. I just realized through this guy, I'm gonna be left in the poor house, and that's not how I'm not gonna be left destitute because you don't want to do this. Get let's get this application going right here, right now, because you know it's not something that can just get in place today, and you're never gonna be basically younger or healthier than you are today.
SPEAKER_01:Exactly.
SPEAKER_03:You need to, that's my thought, you know, because I'm like, you have to have some self-protection. And just because your husband doesn't want to pay for it, well, you're gonna pay for it, buddy. You know, I'm not going into this. Yeah. Because again, look at this lady I just mentioned, you know, the brother absconded with all the funds and she's on just social security. You don't want to be left in that situation. No way. No. When you can do something about it. I don't care if you know it leads to a divorce. I'm gonna say, before we get divorced, man, I'm taking out a policy.
SPEAKER_00:And it goes in the decree that it saves with my name. Yeah. Absolutely. Unfortunately, being in the business, we hear this story too many times. I remember talking to a lady who had just lost her husband and she'd gotten a quote for life insurance, but he was overweight and they thought it cost too much. And so they didn't buy it. And six months later he had a heart attack at the dining room table. There you go. And so we understand it's expensive. It's not necessarily insurance is not something that everybody needs to have a whole lot of. Some people need a lot of it. All depends on your situation. But if you need it, oh my goodness, you definitely have to find every which way to make it happen because unfortunately we have these stories we could talk about for days.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. And again, I could just go on and on and on. I I again just what came to mind is I remember this woman late in life, her husband actually died on the toilet, believe it or not.
SPEAKER_00:But didn't that happen to Elvis?
SPEAKER_03:I think he did. Anyway, he uh he kicks off. Lo and behold, guess what she found out? That he did have he he declined the survivor benefits on his pension. Yeah. Because he wanted more money, you know, monthly.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, to pay out. Yes.
SPEAKER_03:And I'm like, where were you, lady? I mean, seriously, where were you when this was happening? She probably didn't know.
SPEAKER_00:And probably not because and she's thinking he's taking care of it all.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and he just screwed her. Well, you know what I mean. She financially anyway.
SPEAKER_02:The better times.
SPEAKER_03:But yeah, I mean, those are that's not the time you want to find out that there's no more money coming your way.
SPEAKER_00:You know, it's really not.
SPEAKER_03:It is horrible.
SPEAKER_00:So you you bring up such a good point about how it's so it's so important, no matter who you are, it's if you're in a relationship. Well, if you're even if you're not, you need to know where your money goes. But if you're in a relationship to be participating at. So even if the other person handles it, participate so that you know. Obviously, if you're single, you need to know where your money goes so you can make those good decisions, but also putting in a plan and that goes trust on both sides. And if there's intimidation there, then that's all the more reason to find a professional to help you. And at this day and age, I mean, there's so many calculators and tools and resources that we can use, and then you have all the questions we talked about that you can ask to professionals to see who can help you the best. There's really no reason not to have everything in place.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and going back to my friend, like I said, with the the company he asked me to check out, you know, if I say this a lot, and I'm gonna say it again. I always recommend a large company. And the reason why, just like when I told him there's only 10 people working at this firm, there's a lack of continuity, a lack of bench strength. You need to go to a large company because if this ends up being a burning made-off situation, your money's gone, you're not getting it back, the chances of you ever recovering are so slim. If you're with a huge company in the I Oh, it sounds like a commercial, I gotta find more companies, but let's say the Vanguard and the you know Schwab Fidelity, blah, blah, blah. Any of those companies can withstand that kind of mismanagement, embezzlement, etc. If your money is taken by some hook or crook, your chances of getting it back are high. You will probably never be at a loss because it's a huge company. Plus, you're gonna have that continuity. If you your one advisor who you've been working with up and leaves for whatever reason, dies, retires, quits. There's somebody else that's gonna fill right back in. And so you're not gonna have to go, I got to recreate this whole relationship, etc. You know, they're gonna be able to pick right back up. And so that's just my personal belief. I'm not saying that small firms are bad, I'm not, or medium firms, whatever you want to call them. Many people with this firm, you know, the 10 people probably suit them just fine. That wouldn't make me feel good, but if you feel good, whatever, it's your money. But if you ask for my recommendation, I'm gonna say go to a big firm. I don't know. What are your thoughts?
SPEAKER_00:You bring up another point though. If if you do prefer a smaller firm or if it's somebody that you know that you know you want to give them a chance, then make sure that question is there. What is the continuity like? If tomorrow for whatever reason you're not here, what happens to me? What happens to who's taking care of me, who's reviewing my accounts, who's taking care of my investments, ask the questions and make sure that that's something you're comfortable with before going that route.
SPEAKER_03:Right. Yeah. And you know, just like the whole Bernie Madoff thing, too, those statements that they were receiving were just completely doctored. They were meaningless and useless. And you don't know that either, really, because again, you don't know what kind of auditing has taken place, you don't know who's counting their what accounting firm they're using, if they're even using an outside accounting firm. You know, those are all things that I think about, again, when you're looking at and trying to evaluate who's going to be helping you, you don't have to worry about that in these great big large companies, right? Not not that they can't go under, of course, we've seen that many times before, but again, the chances of that happening are significantly lower with the large company.
SPEAKER_00:That's a good point. The audits are usually more often and and larger audits, so that's definitely definitely something to consider.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Yeah. Well, I kind of feel like I'm beating a horse, but anyway, I just I just really, like I said, had these two interactions at least. I've had, you know, it happens to me all the time. But, you know, just really got my wheels turning. And like I said, when I think about women, I don't want you to feel that you can't ask for what you need and get what you want.
SPEAKER_00:Right.
SPEAKER_03:Shit.
SPEAKER_00:I I feel the same. I feel the same way. Like I said, with the when I went to buy that car, I was just so intimidated and so scared. I didn't know what I didn't know, and I just knew that these salesmen were gonna make me pay for something I didn't need. Because I'm you know, well, you know me, I'm non-confrontational and I'm kind of a little bit shy. So we have to make sure with our money. We exactly not stupid, just a little bit scared, a little bit intimidated. So we have to be the same way when it comes to our finances. Make sure you ask the questions, be confident in asking the questions. And you know, when you first meet someone, you can even say, I have three appointments set up with financial planners, advisors, whatever the word is, and then say, These are the questions I'm asking, and I'll get back to you after my third one. That gives you an out so that you don't have to sign the paper. In fact, I was just reading something about consumer awareness today, and they were saying if the deal is good enough today, it'll be good tomorrow. If it's not good tomorrow, it's not good today. So if they're if they're forcing you, you gotta sign on the line, you gotta do it, still not a question for you. Seriously. So so just tell them, you know, you're interviewing people for this and go to the chat GPT, our bestie, and see what kind of questions you should ask, and and then give yourself the confidence because remember they're taking care of you, not the other way around. And if someone was coming to you for service, you would want them to feel confident in what you're providing.
SPEAKER_03:Right.
SPEAKER_00:So make sure you're confident in what they're providing as well.
SPEAKER_03:And you know, one of the things that you said that I really liked is when you threw out to that person, tell them, you know, I'm gonna invite a friend of mine to sit in with us, and she's you know, a CFP or you know, whatever. And if they hesitate or balk or you know, then you right away know, move along. That's not the right person for you. Not exactly. Why do they what do they have to hide? Why would they be shy or embarrassed? They shouldn't be, right? They'd say you're gonna be able to do that.
SPEAKER_00:And if anything changes, right? If anything changes, like how they told my friend it wouldn't be a charge, oh, but then come to find out after six months there'd be a charge. If any of that changes, you're dealing with Shady already.
SPEAKER_02:So Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So just continue. That's right. Like Jerry said earlier, there's so many different designations and licenses out there. So I would say also to think about what it is that you're you're looking for. For example, if you're looking for someone to help you with credit and debt and budgeting, there's certain people that do specifically that. If you're looking for someone to manage your retirement accounts, there are people specifically for that. If you want to look at the big picture, the overall plan specifically for that. So think about each aspect and make sure you're going to the right person who can navigate what you're looking into.
SPEAKER_03:Absolutely. Yeah. And, you know, again, there's certain things that they cannot do and should not be doing and should steer clear of. And what I mean by that is they your investment advisor shouldn't really be giving you legal advice. They might lead you down that path and suggest a few things, but you know, if you need a will, you need a will. They're not going to create a, they should not create a will for you, right?
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_03:Same thing with, you know, if they're trying to give you something that's outside of the realm of their world that they don't have a license or background or experience. And even if they say that I can do that, I would be very hesitant to go to a one's one-stop do-all kind of a person. Nobody is really like that. Nobody. Right.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and taxes and legal, that's that's huge. But both of those are out of the scope of a lot of financial quote unquote advisors. They're p pieces that we might give tidbits on, but they're different worlds. So it's a very, very important that they're not overstepping.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and you know, when you're talking about a financial plan, there's so many different areas that they touch on, you know, from insurance to, like I said, taxes, retirement planning, et cetera, that they have their arms really wrapped around the the big scheme of things. But often when you start, you know, narrowing it down, you know, when you're talking about, let's say, homeowners insurance, property and casualties, et cetera, that's generally outside of the realm of their world. And they may kind of take a high-level look and make sure you're covered with, let's say, an umbrella policy, et cetera. But they are not really going to be probably the person that writes that policy for you and does a whole review of your coverages on your auto insurance. You know, probably not. So those are again are just a couple of examples of being someone very specific. And when you're talking about taxes, Lord knows there's just so much in that world that again, I even myself, I try to stay abreast of it. And it's challenging because things are changing so fast all the time. And it's so broad, there's so much. Anyway.
SPEAKER_00:You know, something else I wanted to mention briefly is a lot of times when people talk to me about their money, they feel that they're should not go to someone because they don't have here, I'm using my quotes again, enough money. And so I would say to you that if you if you have no money, if you're in debt and you need to speak with someone to help you out of that, do that. Get the get the assistance. There's people out there that can help you to get back on the right path. Or if you have five thousand dollars or fifty thousand dollars, never think about do you have enough to speak with a financial person? You have enough. Your whole financial situation is enough. So whether that means improving what you have or if you have a high net worth and you just want to make sure it's managed properly, I wouldn't think of terms of do you have enough to speak with someone because you do.
SPEAKER_03:That's such a good point. You're absolutely right. Because I tell people all the time, even if you're just starting out and let's say the most you can do is 50 bucks a month. Okay. You know, let's work with that and let's do something and have them lay you out a plan, you know, to to help you invest that, but also make sure that you've dotted your I's, crossed your T's, you're putting you're not putting the cart before the horse, you know, you've laid a good solid foundation, getting your debt, all that control. You know what I'm saying? That those are important conversations to have. And if you feel like your brain is swimming in mud, you know, because it feels just too overwhelming, get a professional's help. They should be able to help you. They really should.
SPEAKER_00:They should. But again You know, Jerry, when I first started with my CFP, I when I was first studying for CFP, of course, I was I was just a baby, I didn't know much about anything. But I knew that I needed a Roth IRA because they harped on that.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But at the time, of course, we didn't have internet and all that fun stuff. So I knew I needed this thing, but I didn't know how to get one.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So I'm like, okay, well, I'm supposed to do twenty dollars a month, but I don't know how to get this thing. Now we have so many resources on how to get the tools. There's so many resources on even calculators to show if you invest fifty dollars a month for the next ten years at eight percent, how much will you have? There's ways to see how that will actually give you a long-term benefit that you don't really see because you're thinking 50 isn't enough. So like Jerry said, looking at each of the aspects and starting the plan and starting the steps is really important.
SPEAKER_03:Right, right. And you know, going back to the type of advisor, you know, there are even though someone has their shingle out and says that they're a financial advisor, some advisors won't help you again because they will probably if if let's say they're like, yeah, the minimum has to be like a million dollars for me to help you. Okay. Yeah, I don't have that. Move along. Yeah, there's somebody else, you know, again, or as one more time, call a large company because they have people on staff that are on the phones that are licensed, that are good, that are salaried, and they will help you, you know, with your fifty dollars a month. No problem. Right. Yeah, and if you're embarrassed, that's okay. Don't put them on FaceTime.
SPEAKER_00:And you know, when you call those large firms, because you know, our experience is well, it's I mean, in 30 minutes, you could go from saying, Oh, I have fifty dollars a month I should do something with, and then you call them a 50 or 30 minutes later, it's all set up. Yeah. And then every month it's going. I mean, it's not like you're gonna spend years on this, it's just 15, 20, 30 minutes, and then that's a wrap. And now you have an investment account or emergency fund or whatever it is going.
SPEAKER_03:Right. Or a plan to get out of debt, and then plus a plan to save and you know, all those good things. And again, maybe you don't even buy an investment product right now because it's not the right time. That's good advice in and of itself. You know, there's nothing wrong with that. You know, when the timing's right, then you'll get into that whatever it is, you know. So, like I said, if it's good advice today, it should be good advice tomorrow. You know, nothing wrong with that, nothing wrong with that.
SPEAKER_00:Well, it's all it's all important and it all flows together to the the long thing to long-term goal, but each of the steps is important.
SPEAKER_03:Right. And again, I know that this was an episode I wanted to tailor specifically to women, like I said, but I think that this also serves in broad aspects as well. Like everybody could learn something from this, right? So you don't necessarily, but again, I think that women just bringing this back home particularly feel intimidated handling money sometimes or speaking with someone about their money sometimes. Right. And you shouldn't be. You really, really, really shouldn't be. No way.
SPEAKER_00:And if you are talking to someone and you feel that way, then go to the next one.
SPEAKER_03:There you go. Move on.
SPEAKER_00:The person should make you feel very comfortable.
SPEAKER_03:That's it. That's how I feel. And you feel the same way. We're on the same page. Well, if you have questions or comments or you want to, you know, tell us about your situation, drop me a line. Go on to www.pinkbunnypodcast.com and you can leave a comment or you could sign up and you can there's lots of ways that you can find entertainment and information on the site. Uh the blog that I write is kind of crazy about anything and everything, but like I said, take a look at the companion posts. They're very, very helpful in my mind because again, they're a lot more detailed. And in fact, like what we're talking about right now, I think that I will put a companion post out there about some of the top questions you should be asking a financial advisor, which again will be very helpful. And you could use that as a basis for your interview when you're talking with someone.
SPEAKER_02:Anything else you want to add?
SPEAKER_00:I can't I can't think of anything right now. I think it's important to really talk to whoever you're wanting to help with your situation, make sure you feel comfortable. Ask about the fees, ask the questions, really interview them to make sure that you're at the best place for yourself or whatever it is that you're working on, and make sure you participate, especially if you're in a relationship where the other person is handling the the money, find out, make sure you know all the aspects. It's good to work on that together anyway.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. And you know, one last thing I'm gonna throw out, it's separate, but if you are a woman and you found found this interesting and maybe you want to put yourself in the shoes of being a financial advisor, go for it. You know, go and get licensed, trained, get hired, you know, the whole whole nine yards, do it. I don't think there's enough women in this field to begin with. But again, don't feel that this is a field that's not for you. It is 100% for you. Do it.
SPEAKER_00:Perfect.
SPEAKER_03:Well, thank you so much for being with me today. I think your insights and your information is just extremely helpful. And I I hope that a lot of people uh walk away from this feeling very empowered, you know, by the conversation we had and that they're able to take the bull by the horns or lasso that cow or whatever it is.
SPEAKER_00:I I hope so too. I appreciate you having me, Jerry. It's always good to spend time with you.
SPEAKER_03:Absolutely. Well, we will talk to you next time.
