Single & Struggling – Step 4: Setting SMART Goals That Actually Work

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The following podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Remember to seek competent tax, legal, and investment advice that is unique to your personal situation. Hey everybody. Welcome to the Pink Bunny Podcast. I'm your host, Jerry Williams, and we talk about all things related to money from a queer perspective. And if you've been following along in this uh limited series that I've been doing called Single and Struggling, then you're gonna catch up and find that we're at episode four, I believe. And what we've been doing is trying to find ways to improve our financial situation. And what we've been uh learning is things that we can do that are practical, relatively simple, but easy to follow steps that move you from A to B. And I've been saying all along that we're not looking for perfection, we're just looking for progress. And what we did in episode one is we talked about how do you get started, and we just gather all of our documents, our bills, anything that we've been putting aside or have never opened, and we gather all that and then we sort it, we prioritize it, and that is before we do really anything else. So all we're doing is getting familiar with our situation, right? We're finally getting to see the trees in the forest. And then the second thing that we do is we we have to tackle the most difficult things, so we have to prioritize them by some particular order, and I call this your financial triage. And you're gonna look at things that are in the red zone, so those are the things that have to be handled immediately, those things that are in the yellow zone that are urgent, and those things that are in the blue zone that are not as urgent, and then everything else falls into the black zone. So now we've got a simple order of what we're gonna tackle, and some of these things are gonna be a struggle to get to, but we have to do the best that we can. And I've always been saying as well, rely on AI, whether it's Chat GPT or Gemini or whatever AI you use. I just think it's a good ally in this because you got a lot on your shoulders and need someone to give you the best advice and guidance in terms of how to structure some of these conversations with your creditors that you may not feel comfortable going into. And you don't want to make mistakes and you don't want to go in there scared. You want to have your act together, your I's dotted, and your T's crossed. So now that we've done that, we move on to our next stage, and that is what do we do at this point to break this paycheck by chain paycheck by paycheck cycle? And we start by just marshalling all of our dollars, right? We have to find every single buck that we have and we have to stop spending, period. We don't spend on anything, we have to really account for where our money's going. And so to do that, we stop our spending, like I said, but then we also need to go through our bank statements, etc., and find out where our money's going. And again, you want to do your accounting that says it's going to housing, it's going to my car, it's going to my utilities, my credit cards, everything, right? So we lay everything out. So now we know where our money's going. And this is the part that's pretty sober, right? Sobering, so that you now know, wow, I've got these issues that I need to really figure out. Because we only have so much money and it's only going to go so far. And as I was saying too, right now you probably realize that you are living beyond your means. And like I said, it that was a term that I had heard. I wasn't really sure what that meant. But now that we've gone through step one, two, three, we realize what that means. Yes, we don't have enough money. And there's only way, two ways to get out of this. We have to spend less and bring in more money. That's it. So there's a lot of different ways that we can do that, but just in a nutshell, that's what we have to do. Because we can't continue living paycheck to paycheck, because that's a common way that 60% of Americans live, but that's not normal. And we want to move from this chaotic environment that we're in into a new normal by changing some of our behaviors and habits and realizing that what was working for us before wasn't working. And what we're learning now is we're going to adopt new behaviors and new habits that's going to change how we live today and how we live tomorrow because we're going to use these habits all the time. We're going to learn these new ways of handling our money and handling our life, our financial life, so that we move from A to B to C. And we're going to follow that path of progression. So now here we are, and we've gotten to this point that we probably now need to figure out where we're going. And that is going to be the whole process of laying out our goals. So we've avoided laying out our goals or postpone them. That's probably a better way to say it, because we had other priorities. We couldn't really get to our goals right then and there at the beginning because we had more work to do so that we could just get caught up. We had to cut off the bleeding and we had to tackle the most difficult aspects of our financial life. Like if you're going to be getting kicked out of your apartment or you're going to lose your house or they're going to repossess your car, whatever it is. So we've gotten those red-hot items out of the way, and things have cooled down a little. Hopefully, we were able to get some time and we have found some additional resources that can help you know keep the wolves at bay, you know, and that's really what we wanted to do. So it may not have worked out perfectly, but hey, you work the process and good for you because it takes a lot of effort and it's not easy. And I give you all the props for doing it, and you can pat your own self on the back because that's an amazing job you've done. But we're not done, though, right? We still got more work to do. So here we are, and now what do we do? We have to set really our goals. And what we're going to do is you've always heard smart goals, right? They're specific, they're measurable, they're achievable, they're realistic, and they're time-based. And those are all great things, but I'm just saying that when you're really looking at your goals, you really want to make sure they're in line with what you are trying to achieve because we have our long-term goals, right? Let's say I want to retire at 65, I want to buy a new house, I want to buy a car in cash, whatever it is. Those are real long-term aspirational goals. Nothing wrong with that. Go ahead. If you want to dream, dream big. But we also have our more immediate goals, right? Where we need to get ourselves out of debt, we need to build an emergency fund, and we need to start structuring our deployment of our money in a way that's going to benefit us because we know we're losing money and we know some of the pain points, let's say 50% of my income is going to my housing, is unsustainable, so I got to make some changes. Gotta make some changes because I can't keep that up. It's not possible. So now that we're gonna identify these parts of our life that we want to change, let's set those goals. So let's say you've determined you have, I don't know, six thousand dollars in credit card debt, and maybe you have a personal loan for a couple grand, and maybe you have your obviously your car loan, and you know, maybe there's other people you owe money to or other institutions that you have that you owe their money as well. Okay. So again, the best way, in my opinion, is to dump all this into your AI, your chat GPT, and get specific with the balance, the minimum payment, the interest rate, and the institution so that it can all be organized and then it can create a payoff schedule for you. Now, does it know how much you pay for rent or your how much your mortgage is? No. So you need to feed that. And does it know how much your income is? No. You need to feed that. Are you gonna give it your gross income? You could do that, okay. But we probably want to give it our net after taxes, okay, because that's really what we have that goes into our bank. And as I said before, too, if we're contributing to our 401k, we want to put that into the mix as well, because it is possible that we may need to put that on hold till we get ourselves straightened out. But nevertheless, we feed all this information in there so that we can again strategically deploy our dollars to the greatest degree that we can. And remember, we need to first keep a roof over our head. We have to make sure that our transportation is set so we can get back and forth to work. And then we want to make sure that inside of our four walls that we live in a comfortable environment. So we have to have heat and water and air, all those good things. You may not need air if you're not in Texas, but in Texas, you need air. You will not survive the summer without air. So bake that into it, and all the other things that go into it. Now, again, I've said this too food is a variable expense because you can spend a lot on food or you can spend the minimum amount on food, and we are probably going to shoot for the minimum for the time being. And I'm speaking to most people again as a single person, but again, if you're a single mom, single dad, what have you, then you have those additional responsibilities and you just have to work with that as well. And you can feed as much information into this system as you want so that it can help guide you and create this strategy. Now, so what let's say are we gonna do if 50% of our income is housing? So we want to say I expect to move myself into a housing environment that costs me, let's say, no more than 25% of my current income. Now we're not looking down the road saying I'm gonna get a raise in six months. We're gonna not look that far down the road and hope that we get that raise. Okay, we're just gonna deal with what actually comes in today. So if we let's say we're trying to get that down to that more manageable level, there's a lot of different ways that we can do that, right? And I'm gonna leave all those ways up to you because you know what you have to do, you have to find a housing environment that fits your your goal. That's really what I'm trying to say. Because we can continue on the path that we're on, which is gonna get us nowhere, or we've got to make these changes that's gonna improve our life, and that's what we want. So everything that I just told you, all these goals that you create, make sure that again they're within a realistic time frame. And I believe that ChatGPT will be able to help you with that because you can say, I want to pay all my debt off within, let's say, three years, okay, and that may be achievable, but it may not be. So let's say that your interest rates are just they're just too high, and they're gonna continue to eat away at your plan. And interest, as I mentioned, is just really setting money on fire because it doesn't go anywhere, it doesn't help you. You're just feeding money to these companies freely. You're just saying, hey, take my money, go ahead, I don't need it. And you that's not really the mindset that you want. You want to say, All this money is mine, and if I choose to give you any money, that's because I deem it necessary and worthy, but we're definitely not there. So one way that you could do this is you could probably go to a place like consumer credit counseling. So the reason I say that is because what they will help you do is give them all that information, but then they can go negotiate with your creditors, and they can either reduce your interest rate or get it completely knocked off. And then they will put you on a payoff schedule that's really based on your income that is affordable, and they will just base more or less bundle it into one payment for you. Now that's far and away better than you having, I don't know, eight different people, eight different credit cards, like you know, the banks of personal loans, all that good stuff. Okay, right? Who doesn't want that? Now that may mean, again, you're not gonna get out of debt in two years, three years, it may be more five years. I don't know. That's where you really need to work with them to figure out what works. But can you imagine if you've just been sweating bullets because of all these um collection calls and all these letters you're getting, and all of that's just now off your shoulders. Does that mean, wow, I can go spend? Of course not, right? Do we want to go back to where we were? No, because that's not helpful. So we are gonna stick to this plan and we're gonna work the plan. Now I'm gonna say this as well. If you find that you're in a situation that is basically untenable, and that can be any number of things, it is possible that you may need to go see an attorney and speak with them about the possibilities of bankruptcy. And even that word carries a real negative connotation because once it's on your credit report, it stays there for 10 years and it has far-reaching effects. Maybe a lot of people don't really make them very aware. People I'm trying to say that a lot of people do it freely and shouldn't. They should really give it a lot of thought because, again, it has very harmful effects, and it depends on what you do. What I mean is let's say that you're in the military and you have a security clearance, that could be easily rescinded. Or let's say you want to go get a job in a bank as a teller, that might not happen. Anything that requires you handling money, that is, or you could be compromised, that's what they think. That if somebody has money that they can dangle in front of you, if you're financially compromised, then you're gonna make those decisions in favor of the money. I'm not saying I agree with that, I'm just pointing out the reality of the world we live in. So it can really affect your job. And also, let's say if you want to buy a house, then you're also going to have to deal with the fact that you've declared bankruptcy and you're gonna have to tell the lenders. I uh I you know I declared bankruptcy a year ago, two years ago, five years ago, whatever it was. So, not that it's embarrassing, okay? That get that out of the way. That's that's not a part that of this that we care about. You may find it embarrassing, but we don't care about that. Well, because the part here is that this is financially putting you upright. This is getting you really where you need to be. It is a tool that we can use if we deem it necessary, but we don't go into it willy-nilly. We definitely need to really decide if it's gonna be in our best interests, and we have really no other escape route. So we want to try these other things first, other than just going to the attorney saying, hey, you know, uh for$300 I can file bankruptcy, let's do it. No, no, we don't we don't want to do that. So again, thought goes into this before we go down that path. So let's leave that there. I think I've said enough about it, and I'm not even going, I'm not even gonna go into the different types of bankruptcy because again, you really need to seek legal advice to determine the different types and one that you may pick over another. So there's a couple different ones that are relevant to the individual, but again, you really need to get some good solid advice before you go down that path. So let's set that aside and say we're gonna just do the consumer credit counseling. And now that we've got some basic goals set, you know, of getting out of debt, creating an emergency fund. And speaking of an emergency fund, that is really something that we have to tackle first as well, because we cannot find ourselves broke. We really need to have a pot of money that we could rely on if things go south. What I mean by that, let's say that you find yourself laid off. Let's say you find yourself, you know, you have fired, they they downsize and they let you go. So you need some kind of cash cushion to hold you up during this time frame. They say three to six months worth of living expenses. It really just depends on your personal situation. More cash is better than less cash. So you've got all these obligations, but what you need to do is create that one first. And it sounds a little strange, but you have to. Now, even saving money can be tricky sometimes because people don't want to do it. I really don't know why people don't want to do it. I think it's because you feel like you have these other obligations and that you're not important, but you are an obligation to yourself. And so if you have to pay a creditor, pay yourself because you're a creditor too, and that is important. Now, you may not be able to give yourself a hundred dollars out of every paycheck, but you could do something strategically like a dollar a day, that's a way to get you started, and that's a way to build up that you know muscle, that savings muscle. Now, if let's say that's kind of not possible based on the way that you get paid, then you know, if you do have things to sell, or you take up gig work, the DoorDash, the Uber, or some writing gig, or any number of those things that bring in some money, that can be your means to, you know, do 50 bucks a week or whatever it is, whatever it is. Try to make it consistent because that consistency is gonna build that muscle. And even if you're doing small amounts of money, it's doing something, and that will continue to grow and grow and grow, and that's what we want. We want you to get into this habit of saying, I've got to pay myself first. It doesn't mean you pay yourself everything, but I've got to build, I've got to put some money aside for me. And that$30 goes and grows into 60, you know, on and on and on and on. And that's what we want. And we're gonna continue to do that basically forever. That is gonna be a habit that we now use forever. We're never gonna do that. We're never gonna stop doing that. We're not gonna skip us, we're gonna continue to do it. Sure, there could be some week or some situation that you absolutely cannot, but for the most part, we're gonna pay ourselves first. And that's just how it goes. Pay yourself first, build that emergency fund, it's that important. So I think that I'm gonna leave it there because you've got a little bit of work to do, and that's okay. You've made it this far, you've done a lot of work, right? And we did step one, we did step two, we did step three, and now we're at step four. So we're gonna keep building because we're not 100% where we want to be. There's a couple more things I want to give you, but I don't want to overload you with everything. And I think as you go through this series, I think that if you really put it put in the effort to do the steps correctly, you're gonna find that you're gonna be successful. Again, probably not perfect, but that is okay. We're not perfect people, we are a work in progress, and that's okay. There's no problem in that. So give yourself all the support that you need. Reach out to others if you need support. Happy to help you anyway, shape, or can't any way, shape, or form I can. You can reach me through my website. I think there's links all over the place. Anyway, continue to listen to the series and reach out to other people if you think that they're in need and point them this way. I would appreciate it. I thank you for listening, and I will talk to you next time.