TheBLAST Podcast

041.2 - Carl Milliman: God’s Grace in Action [PART 2]

February 25, 2019 Season 5 Episode 2
TheBLAST Podcast
041.2 - Carl Milliman: God’s Grace in Action [PART 2]
Chapters
00:00:00
Introduction
00:00:46
Interview With Carl Milliman
00:13:50
Musical Interlude - Slow Fade by Casting Crowns
00:15:09
FAKE NEWS Update - Every Single Person At Church Clapping On Different Beat
00:16:34
Interview With Carl Milliman (Continued)
00:30:34
Preview of Next Week's Episode
TheBLAST Podcast
041.2 - Carl Milliman: God’s Grace in Action [PART 2]
Feb 25, 2019 Season 5 Episode 2
TheBLAST Podcast / Carl Milliman
There is a tremendous amount of agony and pain in this story, but also there are valuable lessons learned that Carl shares with us.
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

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This is part two of our interview with the pioneer pastor of our church here in Virginia Beach, Carl Milliman. If you haven’t heard the first segment of the interview, make sure you go back and listen to it here.

We pick up the story of Carl Milliman’s testimony as he goes off the spiritual cliff. There is a tremendous amount of agony and pain in this story, but also there are valuable lessons learned that Carl shares with us.

During the break, we hear a timeless classic from Casting Crowns, Slow Fade. Then a hilarious FAKE NEWS article from The Babylon Bee.

Thanks again for listening! 

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Pas:
0:00
Previously heard on TheBLAST Podcast,:
Carl Milliman:
0:02
January, 1981, I went searching for those men that were witnessing and talking about Jesus because the Holy Spirit was after me. So I went to find these guys and really inquire about how could I have what they had. And they were shocked because you know, I was coming after them and find out how to be safe.:
Narrator:
0:28
On this episode of TheBLAST Podcast, Pastor Adam Dragoon and Mr. David Smale are blasting across the interwebs, digging deeper into the practical application of God's word for our lives. Snowflakes, beware we're blasting off on this edition of TheBLAST Podcast.:
Pas:
0:47
As pioneers we can, we can just lock into that goal and that purpose of building the church and prayer life and you know, all, all of those things that we hear preached from the, from the pulpit, but all of those things, building the church is, uh, I don't want to see, it's useless, but it would, it, it's not going to help if we build the church and, and lose our marriage in the process. Right? Right. Is that what I'm, is that accurate, would you say?:
Carl Milliman:
1:15
Yeah, that's, you know, it you're going to have, whether the church, uh, you know, grows or whether it's just a deadly doesn't, you know, or just you and your, your wife and kids, you, you're going to have to still have a marriage. You know, whether you go back in for redirection or whether you go, you know, you survived in the Kingdom of God, you've got to keep your marriage intact. You've gotta, that has to be, you know, she has to know that, that she is an extremely important, um, and it's not just about nickels, noise, and numbers. Right. Right. We always, uh, you know, we, we, we get, uh, stomped on from those departed that, that, you know, that that's all it's about. But that's not what it's about. It's about, you know, love and serving your, your family and your God. Right. And the people of God.:
Pas:
2:26
Yeah. Okay. Well, yeah, that's, that's a fantastic point that we need to remember along the way. And so what I'm interested in is, is you have been through the worst of that and, uh, you know, you, you made a few mistakes and, and we have the incredible privilege of learning from those mistakes. And I guess I just want to, I want to know what the next chapter was at as you, uh, as you watched a marriage fall apart and then what came next?:
Carl Milliman:
2:57
Well, uh, you know, I, I tried to keep my, you know, my salvation intact, um, after my first wife left to she, she left. Um, and you know, different, uh, circumstances of reasons why. And you know, one of the reasons that was, uh, she portrayed was that I was, you know, I was a very mean at times, you know, and, and that's true. I was very mean at times. I was not very calm at times. I was very angry at times. And so you're, you definitely have to watch your, uh, your, your, your tongue and how you speak to your wife and how you speak to your people is being slow to speak and slow to wrath is really, uh, is really what, what point I want to touch on there in is, you know, being careful. Um, so what happened at that time was I, you know, I tried to maintain my salvation and I got a more and more engulfed in my work and my the company that I was working for took me all over the world. So I was flying all over the world. So I wasn't really in churches much as I could, you know, could be. Um, I'd be gone for three to four weeks at a time. And, um, so you mean my involvement in the Kingdom of God just disintegrated. My prayer life disintegrated and I didn't, you know, I didn't spend a lot of time with my children, so it really affected my, my children at that time. And My, you know, my whole outlook on life and ministry and you know, my, my ex-wife blamed the ministry and you definitely don't, you know, you don't want to go down that road. Um, but I stayed in the church there for, uh, four years. Uh, after she left, I stayed in the church trying to, you know, maintain my salvation and it just disintegrated to the point where I, you know, decided that I was gonna I was gonna leave and try to, you know, just, just a little go back, you know, who know, not, not really knowing what I was going to do, but I was just, uh, I was, God got involved with, uh, you know, other people who had left the church. Um, so hanging around, you know, the birds of a feather flock. You know, I was hanging around with the wrong people. Uh, I was going to, you know, getting involved in, in a gambling and drinking and you know, drugs again. And as you know, after, after being a pastor and Preaching and preaching the Gospel and knowing these things and, you know, getting involved in, in more immoral relationships, uh, and, uh, all the things that, you know, we, I preached, um, were I was having to face them and see the reality of, wow, this really is, uh, destroying my life. And I was at a club one night in Tempe, uh, drinking jello shots and smoking stuff and snorting stuff and in an illicit relationship. And I was, went to the house at w actually at the club, there was a, uh, some guys that I was with, some backsliders and there was a big, a big fight broke out. And after, you know, going out to the parking lot, and I'm, the only thing that's going through my head is that somebody in this is going to get killed, could very easily, somebody could just pull out a gun and pop, pop. And, you know, I could, I could be in hell. And so, so fear just gripped my life. Here I am, you know, I have the answer and I'm in the pit. I, when I made it out of there, I got home and the the spirit of God just never, he never left me alone. Always, you know, was I think that the spirit of God was God. God was taking it easy on me. Could have made it a whole lot worse for me. But in that time, the spirit of God just spoke to me that night and said, you know, you might not never have a chance. This might be the last.. This could be the last chance. That I deal with you, I might not never deal with you ever again. Yeah. And so there I was and I'm like, wow. I was like that close to the edge, to the very edge of falling off and never been able to come back and like a reprobate, like, like everything I had preached, everything I knew was at that point, a decision point of was at point of no return. Was I ever going to make it back.That's when I cried out to God that night. Yeah. That night I was, I was wasted out of my brains and the spirit of God was on me that night and I cried out. I cried out to Go:
Pas:
9:32
Well, thank God. I want to just take a pause there because I just want to remind every single person who's listening to this that this is not what I'm trying to say, that this, this is not something that's impossible for you to go through. We oftentimes, we hear the rosy stories of how faith, how we were able to endure through temptation. You know, and we can pat ourselves on the back. But this testimony that we're hearing tonight, look to him who thinks he let him take heed lest he fall lest he fall. And what Carl, what you were going through at that time, it is so close to any one of us. And you know, you had gone through a situation that wasn't entirely your fault, but it led to one decision to another and it led you down that path. And I am wary. I'm very careful. I try to be careful to realize that, you know, I am not that far away from that, from that position that you were in. As long as a, I keep making right decisions then, then thank God he keeps me in His grace, but you know, just a few decisions can lead to that same place that you are in. Wouldn't you say that that's an important thing for, for us to remember?:
Carl Milliman:
11:03
I just want to say again, if there's anybody listening to this and maybe some of these things or you can concur with them, you can see maybe some of these things in your life. I would say pay attention now and start to fix those things and go to your past or go to your headship and begin to cry out to God and say, God, I need to fix some of these things. I need to fix my character. I need to fix my heart here. I need to pay attention to my marriage. I need to pay attention here because things can very easily come unglued because there is no real devil that he wants to kill and steal and destroy your life or your marriage.:
Pas:
11:55
And one of the things that's destroying so many people is pornography because this is the kind of thing that, that you can hide and you can conceal it from everybody else. And people, I mean, I've, I've had a couple of people just within the last month that have come to me and confessed that they're, they're having a problem with this. And, and you know, you can, uh, you know, you see him coming into church and you know, acting like all is okay, but on the inside, totally just being defeated. And, uh, and, and so what you're saying is so good because, uh, because just a little bit of reaching out for help, just, just one courageous step of confession can change all of that and can put someone back on the right track.:
Carl Milliman:
12:43
Right? And that's where we see the little leaven that leavens the who lump and he who is without sin cast the first stone. We've all easily beset us. You've got to pay attention to them and take dominion over them because they will, they will beat you. The devil will beat you down and he'll put you in a corner and he'll back you into this corner where you will feel like nobody will listen to you. You're defeated. You're, you can do this. You can't serve God. You can't live right, and that's all a lie from hell. It's just corrupted because you can't, you can recover, you can be restored, you can be healed. And that's the whole Gospel.:
Pas:
13:32
Yes, and that's exactly what we want to talk about when we were going to take a little break right here. We'll give our audience a chance to catch up and as soon as we come back from the break, that's what we want to hear. Next is the story of your redemption and restoration. So hang on, hang tight with us. We'll be right back on TheBLAST Podcast.:
Pas:
15:11
This week's article from the Babylon bee is called every single person at church clapping on a different beat. WARREN, OH—Multiple sources at Bethlehem Community Church confirmed that every single person at the church was clapping on a different beat throughout the entire worship set Sunday morning. As the first upbeat worship song began, congregants started clapping along cheerily, but the horrified worship band suddenly realized that not a single person could get their claps to match up with one another. "I'm not even sure how that's possible," one analyst said in watching a video of the service. "With hundreds of churchgoers in attendance, you'd think at least one or two of them would match up." "It's a fascinating phenomenon," he added. Sure enough, careful study of footage of the event revealed that through all six worship songs, every single church member seemed to be clapping on an entirely different---and entirely random---beat. Further study revealed that not a single person was clapping on the correct beat, sources confirmed at publishing time.:
Pas:
16:31
Let me back to TheBLAST Podcast tonight. We, uh, are here with Carl Millman, who has just told us an incredible story, but it's not over. We thank God it's not over. Yeah, we're, we're, we're like at halftime now. We're coming back for the second half, which is the good half, I think.:
:
16:51
I mean, well, I mean, all of this took place. It was probably mid nineties, if I've got my timeline right. Is that correct Carl?:
Carl Milliman:
17:01
Well, yeah, the ministry coming back in to Chandler was, yeah, in 1995, and then 1997 was when my marriage came unglued. Uh, completely, uh, divorce in 97. So you're talking about, you know, like 20 years ago.:
:
17:35
I mean, the fact that we're talking to you tonight and 2018 is a great indicator that something changed along the way and we'd love to hear how that took place. It started on that night when you kinda came to the end of yourself, like that son radical son, and cried out to God for redemption. And so this is where the Gospel is so interesting because the same gospel that saved you in a w I think you said 1979 from your sins is exactly this. Oh, 1981 is this is the same gospel that redeemed you. And we'd love to hear how that took place.:
Carl Milliman:
18:22
Crying out to God. There was a man that I had stayed in touch with them through the years. His name is nick, was a very, very, uh, uh, so grateful for this man that down through the years he stayed a friend with me, even in my, uh, turmoil of divorce and backsliding. Uh, he was still a friend. He, we would, he would call me up for coffee and just to let me know that he was a friend, that he was there for me. And, um, so, so it was his heart and his, uh, Barnabas kind of a heart that he has for people that really affected my life in those times. And I knew who to call. Um, because, and I just want to make a point here that people who, who are, who are, uh, separated from God, um, they, they, they're, um, the, one of the key things that the people of God can do is, you know, now, and then you need to reach out to those people. You need to touch base with them and let them know that you love them and you care for them. And it's not, not completely isolate and shut them out, have a redemptive heart, because that's what I knew who to call. I knew who really cared and I knew who I could talk to. And so that's what I did. I, I went, I went looking for him. I went, you know, like what must I do back to the Kingdom of God. What can I do? What do I gotta do? And so it was that conversation with him calling him up. He was looking for me. Actually, it's a time because, uh, I was doing plumbing for him and, and I, I was, I had done plumbing for him during the times of all of my chaos. Um, and so he was looking for me for plumbing, but I was looking for him because I just wanted to get my heart right. I needed somebody who they would pray with me. And so, uh, he, you know, with, uh, teaming up together, we made a call to, you know, to pastor Campbell. And we had talked with both Pastor Campbell and Pastor Aulson of the Tempe Church. And at that time I had, uh, I had met, uh, a young lady from that was, had gone through divorce, uh, from the Chandler Church. I had known her for quite some time. And, um, we, we had gotten married and so we had made the decision that, you know, we were going to find our way back no matter what. No matter what it takes, we were going to find our way back to God's will and God's plan for our lives. And so we, we talk with Pastor Campbell, we talked with pastor Aulson and a, it was a joint decision that we could go into the Tempe church and start over again, start fresh there, in the Tempe church. And that was in March of, uh, 2002 that you went into the Chandler church or into the Tempe church in March of 2002.:
:
22:24
Gosh. What a miracle.:
Carl Milliman:
22:27
And so at that point, you know, we, I was still, you know, I was still a mess. Um, you know, after losing everything and losing my mind in my wife, Sylvia had lost her marriage. And you know, uh, so, so it was, it was, it was a mess, um, to say the least. And so coming back in, coming into the Tempe Church was, was difficult because we didn't know very many people. We didn't fit in very well. And sometimes I think that one of the, one of the major issues is that I could address rate here is it's, you know, it's part of the church's responsibility of members of the congregation to really reach out and to, to befriend and to love those people that have destroyed their lives and they just want to, to, uh, they just to, to find their place and find their heart and be accepted and to, to be restored and to be healed. And it's so critical to, to reach out to those people because they're, they're, um, they're a mess. Believe me, their a mess. And they just want friends. They just want to know that people care for them and, and that they can, they can, you know, find their place and it'd be healed. And so, uh, my first couple of years they're coming back in. If it didn't go that well because, uh, my own, you, you pick up a lot of things if you backslide, you pick up a lot of crud. You pick up a lot of, uh, they latch onto you. Things that don't easily get off of you. They, they stick to you and, and you pick up things that are instilled in your spirit, in your, in your mind. And that the sin, you know, I didn't... a lot of the reason why I struggled the first two years was that I didn't get involved. I didn't let things go. I still hung on to, you know, some of those old relationships of friends that were backsliders and people that were going to the casinos and drinking beer and, you know, and the partying and things, you know, I didn't cut off those relationships right away. And because they were family, they were, they were, they were, they were family that had backslidden. Uh, primarily. And you know, with, um, my wife's family members that had been in the Chandler church, had back slidden. And so hanging around with those kinds of people, we're the only people that we knew. So we, we hung around with them and did things, you know, so, so it took, it took some time, uh, of, of, uh, really, you know, facing the music and, uh, you know, getting in under the preaching of the word of God to, to, to be washed, to be sanctified, to be, you know, to be healed. And I think it, you know, it, it could have, it could have been easier if I had to let go and not allowed those things, but it could have been easier too, if I had, you know, some, some people that really reached out to me and you know, Nick, nick did, Nick Rice did, he reached out to me and helped me, a couple of families in theTempe church started to, you know, take us in and befriend us. And really starting to pay attention. But I want to say one thing here that helped me the most I would say is when I met with, uh, my pastor and he, he reached out, he came to our house and he sat down with us and he started to really probe us and you know, ask us some serious questions about, you know, what, what were we going to do where we, I'm going to just hit and miss where we going to just be, you know, come into church on Sunday morning and, and jet out of before anybody could ever say anything to us or were we serious about, uh, being healed and being restored. And, um, so that, that, that meeting where he came to our house was, this was a turning point. It was one of the major turning points. Um, another major turning point I want to say is when I made a decision that I was going to, um, get my prayer life back in order, I was going to, I was going to start to pray every day, even if it was for five or 10 minutes a day of praying and reading my Bible that I was going to get back to some of those basics of just, uh, saying God. I, you know, I'm sorry. And really just pouring my heart out. God, I want to be healed. I want to be restored. I want, I want, I want to make heaven my home. And so just crying out to God, uh, you know, making time every day to, to pray. It was that those were two major turning points was the relationship and some, you know, surrendering to, to the headship that God placed me, God put me there and surrendering and submitting to my headship and prayer and crying out to God. Uh, those things. From that point on, it was like turning a page, turning a chapter in my life and, and my, my marriage and my pastor was able to get to work with me then and, and helped me fixed, help, help, help him, God fix things. And, and, and my life, they didn't my marriage. And so with all the, with all the kids, I had, you know, four daughters from my first marriage and my, my new wife had five children from her previous marriage. So we're at nine kids, the Brady bunch. And it was, it was very difficult, you know, it was very, very, extremely difficult.:
David Smale:
30:26
On the next episode of TheBLAST Podcast,:
Carl Milliman:
30:29
they had invested, you know, thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars into pioneering years of Virginia Beach. And you know, so there was a lot of shame when I, when I had to face my brother and then I had to face the music facing. There's the, in the shame of it, I had to go to pasture Campbell and Shay to him. Pastor Campbell, I'm, you know, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I've done.:
Narrator:
31:00
Thanks for listening to TheBLAST Podcast. If you like what you heard, please leave us a review on iTunes and share with someone who will love it. If you don't like what you've heard, forget we said anything. Sign up to receive new episodes or listen to previous ones on our website, the [inaudible] dot org until next time, live for God. Use your brain. Read Your Bible, Love Your family. Listen to your pastor. Pay your tithe, and don't be stupid.:
Introduction
Interview With Carl Milliman
Interview With Carl Milliman (Continued)
Preview of Next Week's Episode
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