{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"startTime":0.55,"endTime":5.3,"body":"Hello, my golf friend, and welcome to Above Par. It's nice to have"},{"startTime":5.3,"endTime":8.582,"body":"you back. I think I say that every time, I need to shake"},{"startTime":8.582,"endTime":10.82,"body":"that up, I'm gonna shake that up next time, I don't know what"},{"startTime":10.82,"endTime":12.48,"body":"I'm gonna say, but I'm gonna shake that up next time."},{"startTime":12.62,"endTime":16.56,"body":"So whether you're listening on the podcast or you're watching me on YouTube,"},{"startTime":16.68,"endTime":20.84,"body":"I would really appreciate a subscribe, a like, a comment, anything that"},{"startTime":20.84,"endTime":24.36,"body":"helps more people find me, and the algorithms get fired up,"},{"startTime":24.36,"endTime":27.82,"body":"whatever they do, it's just so more people can help their golf games"},{"startTime":27.92,"endTime":31.08,"body":"with this information. So if you can do that, I would really appreciate"},{"startTime":31.08,"endTime":36.46,"body":"it. So this topic today is about procrastination, and it really is something"},{"startTime":36.46,"endTime":39.28,"body":"that hits home for me, I knew I was gonna talk about this"},{"startTime":39.28,"endTime":41.96,"body":"topic or this was going to be one of the topics of a"},{"startTime":41.96,"endTime":47.53,"body":"podcast, because when I started this whole podcast, perfectionism had reared"},{"startTime":47.572,"endTime":51.16,"body":"its ugly head for me again, in a big, bad way."},{"startTime":51.32,"endTime":53.58,"body":"I thought I had put it away in a closet, I thought I"},{"startTime":53.58,"endTime":57.06,"body":"would call myself a reform perfectionist, but it came up when I started"},{"startTime":57.06,"endTime":60.18,"body":"to do this podcast. I wanna talk to you today about what is"},{"startTime":60.18,"endTime":65.06,"body":"healthy perfectionism and what is unhealthy perfectionism? Where it doesn't"},{"startTime":65.06,"endTime":67.64,"body":"serve us, I think we can confuse the two of those,"},{"startTime":67.65,"endTime":71.4,"body":"and sometimes we can label things as perfectionist when it's not,"},{"startTime":71.76,"endTime":75.42,"body":"and sometimes we can glorify perfectionism, when it doesn't serve people."},{"startTime":75.74,"endTime":78.0,"body":"And so I wanna talk about the difference between those and how it"},{"startTime":78.0,"endTime":81.48,"body":"shows up in golf, but I do believe this, I believe how you"},{"startTime":81.48,"endTime":84.78,"body":"do one thing, you do everything, so that means that if you're a"},{"startTime":84.78,"endTime":87.8,"body":"perfectionist off the golf course, it's gonna show up on a golf course."},{"startTime":87.8,"endTime":92.08,"body":"You can't separate it. I learned so much from that statement on all"},{"startTime":92.08,"endTime":94.84,"body":"the different things that I did off of the golf course,"},{"startTime":95.04,"endTime":97.74,"body":"where a lot of the reasons why I wasn't playing to my potential"},{"startTime":97.74,"endTime":101.04,"body":"and I wasn't having as much fun, and I was frustrated all the"},{"startTime":101.04,"endTime":104.82,"body":"time with my performance, so it wasn't necessarily about the things that"},{"startTime":104.82,"endTime":108.98,"body":"I was doing on the golf course, but it was about those characteristics"},{"startTime":109.32,"endTime":112.42,"body":"and fears that I had that were everywhere in my life,"},{"startTime":112.42,"endTime":114.9,"body":"and so I wanna talk to you about that today. So some of"},{"startTime":114.9,"endTime":118.76,"body":"the things that we can do besides perfectionism is off the golf course,"},{"startTime":118.76,"endTime":122.48,"body":"it'll show up on the golf course as being overly critical or judgmental,"},{"startTime":122.49,"endTime":128.46,"body":"we might be a people pleaser or a victim or emotional responsibility,"},{"startTime":128.54,"endTime":130.82,"body":"we might not have off the golf course and we're definitely not gonna"},{"startTime":130.82,"endTime":134.46,"body":"have it on the golf course. Emotional control, we might also have just"},{"startTime":134.46,"endTime":137.2,"body":"a low self worth, which will show up on the golf course in"},{"startTime":137.42,"endTime":140.3,"body":"lots of different ways that you're not able to take your best game"},{"startTime":140.3,"endTime":142.74,"body":"out there, you put in all that work, you know you have the"},{"startTime":142.74,"endTime":147.1,"body":"talent and you can't maximize it when you have these different things that"},{"startTime":147.1,"endTime":150.54,"body":"are getting in the way of you performing your best, so perfectionism is"},{"startTime":150.54,"endTime":154.7,"body":"one of them. And I wanna talk about it today. So by definition,"},{"startTime":154.7,"endTime":160.1,"body":"perfectionism is a refusal to accept any standard, short of perfection,"},{"startTime":160.68,"endTime":163.86,"body":"and I think the big two words in there are refusal and then"},{"startTime":163.88,"endTime":166.84,"body":"standard, I think that's the part where we get a little confused because"},{"startTime":166.84,"endTime":170.3,"body":"we can have a high standard, which we perceive to be a good"},{"startTime":170.3,"endTime":173.98,"body":"thing. Right? That is a nice characteristic to have, that you have high"},{"startTime":173.98,"endTime":177.88,"body":"standards, that you're always striving to work harder and improve"},{"startTime":178.66,"endTime":182.32,"body":"a better and higher version of yourself and your golf game,"},{"startTime":182.32,"endTime":184.96,"body":"we have high standards for different things, I think that's a nice trait"},{"startTime":184.96,"endTime":189.96,"body":"to have, in my opinion. But what comes with that is also having"},{"startTime":189.96,"endTime":194.48,"body":"your own back, working hard, but being willing to make mistakes,"},{"startTime":194.9,"endTime":198.56,"body":"be willing to fail and learn from your mistakes, not making them mean"},{"startTime":198.56,"endTime":203.46,"body":"anything about yourself, not connecting your achievement to your identity,"},{"startTime":204.54,"endTime":209.28,"body":"having a little compassion for yourself, having realistic expectations and"},{"startTime":209.3,"endTime":211.46,"body":"on your own abilities and what you can do"},{"startTime":212.38,"endTime":216.4,"body":"and enjoying the ride, the whole process, you just love going through the"},{"startTime":216.4,"endTime":220.4,"body":"process of trying to get to that higher standard. I think that's healthy."},{"startTime":220.62,"endTime":222.6,"body":"I don't think there's anything wrong with that, in my opinion."},{"startTime":223.4,"endTime":230.66,"body":"But perfectionism is that refusal or intolerance for anything short of perfection,"},{"startTime":230.98,"endTime":233.82,"body":"that's where we get into trouble, that's where we've crossed the line,"},{"startTime":234.22,"endTime":237.1,"body":"to where we're in a state where it's not serving us,"},{"startTime":237.44,"endTime":239.66,"body":"and what I mean by not serving us as being that we're not"},{"startTime":239.66,"endTime":241.96,"body":"able to take our best talent out on the golf course,"},{"startTime":241.96,"endTime":246.82,"body":"but also we just feel crappy. Perfectionism is also tied to a lot"},{"startTime":246.82,"endTime":250.8,"body":"of anxiety and stress, and anxiety for sure doesn't serve us,"},{"startTime":250.94,"endTime":254.72,"body":"nobody, you don't wanna live your life in a state of anxiety or"},{"startTime":254.74,"endTime":259.38,"body":"stress, especially on the golf course. And this is a thing that how"},{"startTime":259.38,"endTime":261.94,"body":"it doesn't work with golf so greatly is that golf is not a"},{"startTime":261.94,"endTime":264.8,"body":"game of perfect. I should write a book."},{"startTime":265.48,"endTime":268.78,"body":"So it's just not a perfect game, it can't be... We can't control"},{"startTime":268.78,"endTime":273.54,"body":"bounces, we can't control roles, our lies or divots, or the length of"},{"startTime":273.54,"endTime":277.08,"body":"grass, or the weather, or who we play with, if we're playing in"},{"startTime":277.08,"endTime":280.36,"body":"tournaments, you can if you're playing casual golf. Those things are out"},{"startTime":280.36,"endTime":283.76,"body":"of our control. So it's impossible for the game to be perfect,"},{"startTime":284.5,"endTime":288.76,"body":"even as humans, it's very difficult for us to repeat the same swing"},{"startTime":288.86,"endTime":291.9,"body":"no matter how much we've practiced over and over again, there's"},{"startTime":292.42,"endTime":295.46,"body":"evidence of that just watching the best players in the world who play"},{"startTime":295.46,"endTime":299.56,"body":"in practice every single day since they were probably teens or younger,"},{"startTime":300.16,"endTime":305.76,"body":"make imperfect swings, but when we put that level of perfectionism and wanting"},{"startTime":305.76,"endTime":309.68,"body":"to be perfect on our golf game, that pressure that we put on"},{"startTime":309.68,"endTime":315.26,"body":"ourselves to perform, makes swinging our best damn near impossible."},{"startTime":316.44,"endTime":320.76,"body":"So for me, my first sign of my perfectionism came up in school"},{"startTime":320.76,"endTime":324.42,"body":"where I love to make A's, I enjoyed making an A and then"},{"startTime":324.463,"endTime":329.18,"body":"I became intolerant of making anything other than A's, and I remember making"},{"startTime":329.18,"endTime":332.58,"body":"a poster on the Presidents in high school that"},{"startTime":333.18,"endTime":335.68,"body":"probably included a little bit of artistic skill, which"},{"startTime":336.36,"endTime":340.04,"body":"all I can do is about a stick finger. That's about it."},{"startTime":340.28,"endTime":343.42,"body":"So I really put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure"},{"startTime":343.42,"endTime":347.72,"body":"I did that poster perfectly. I wanted to make sure that I got"},{"startTime":347.72,"endTime":351.18,"body":"the A, I put way too much time into it that I needed"},{"startTime":351.38,"endTime":354.52,"body":"to put into it. It didn't serve me because I put so much"},{"startTime":354.52,"endTime":358.26,"body":"pressure on myself, and I had a lot of anxiety about what was"},{"startTime":358.26,"endTime":362.5,"body":"gonna happen on the subjective grade I was going to get."},{"startTime":363.2,"endTime":365.5,"body":"Now maybe it did serve me in a way that I ended up"},{"startTime":365.5,"endTime":368.18,"body":"skipping a year high school because I was such a perfectionist and"},{"startTime":369.04,"endTime":371.44,"body":"made good grades. Did that serve me? I don't know,"},{"startTime":372.62,"endTime":375.84,"body":"maybe... Maybe I excelled a little bit quicker than other people,"},{"startTime":376.22,"endTime":379.44,"body":"but it did come at a cost, I remember that being one of"},{"startTime":379.44,"endTime":382.1,"body":"the big moments that sticks out in my head as the first signs"},{"startTime":382.1,"endTime":386.54,"body":"of my perfectionism, and it showed up on the golf course for sure."},{"startTime":386.54,"endTime":390.38,"body":"As I competed in college and I went on to play professional golf,"},{"startTime":390.58,"endTime":396.7,"body":"I became very intolerant of making mistakes, I wanted to play perfect rounds,"},{"startTime":397.28,"endTime":401.18,"body":"and that put pressure on myself to not make any mistakes."},{"startTime":401.8,"endTime":405.24,"body":"It's impossible to perform. I did not perform my best for sure."},{"startTime":406.6,"endTime":409.4,"body":"But this is the thing we get to define perfect, right?"},{"startTime":409.4,"endTime":411.62,"body":"I got to define, perfect. What it is for me."},{"startTime":412.86,"endTime":416.52,"body":"At what point was that poster good enough for me to submit?"},{"startTime":417.84,"endTime":419.52,"body":"At what point was I willing to sit there and go,"},{"startTime":419.66,"endTime":421.08,"body":"\"This is as good as it's gonna get."},{"startTime":421.96,"endTime":424.28,"body":"And I'm gonna go ahead and turn it in.\" That happened with my"},{"startTime":424.28,"endTime":428.04,"body":"podcast, I re did the first couple of podcasts,"},{"startTime":429.46,"endTime":433.38,"body":"that's when perfections came back out. The first one, I think I recorded"},{"startTime":433.38,"endTime":436.64,"body":"it like eight times, I was not satisfied with any of it, and"},{"startTime":436.82,"endTime":439.24,"body":"it took me a while, I'm just gonna be honest for me to"},{"startTime":439.25,"endTime":443.7,"body":"notice, \"Oh boy, my perfectionism is back out,\" and the reason that I"},{"startTime":443.7,"endTime":448.02,"body":"didn't wanna hit upload or send or put it out into the universe"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":448.02,"endTime":450.98,"body":"I had a tremendous fear of it not being perfect."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":452.16,"endTime":454.9,"body":"I reined that back in, once I noticed what was going on."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":455.56,"endTime":458.32,"body":"I had to be willing to put out B work,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":458.98,"endTime":462.42,"body":"go ahead and send it out there, be okay with all my rights"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":462.42,"endTime":465.88,"body":"and my ums and you knows. I edit, if you watch some of"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":465.88,"endTime":470.9,"body":"my earlier YouTube, when I recorded them on YouTube, it's so spliced up"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":470.9,"endTime":472.92,"body":"because I edited the heck out of it,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":473.9,"endTime":476.36,"body":"I was trying to make it as perfect as I could."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":476.92,"endTime":480.38,"body":"It was exhausting. I had so much anxiety and pressure over those first"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":481.56,"endTime":485.0,"body":"episodes... And this is the thing too. I think in golf,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":485.0,"endTime":488.38,"body":"what happens is, I don't think technology has survived us so well,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":488.38,"endTime":492.62,"body":"and I think it's bred a lot of perfectionists, like TrackMan, people are"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":492.62,"endTime":497.08,"body":"just so obsessed with the numbers of TrackMan. I have a love hate"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":497.08,"endTime":501.36,"body":"relationship with TrackMan and technology, just to be certain and clear"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":501.36,"endTime":504.72,"body":"here. I think it serves a purpose, but it's a tool,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":504.9,"endTime":508.56,"body":"it is not an indicator of your ability to perform and score,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":509.6,"endTime":512.1,"body":"and we use it as that, we use it as being,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":512.1,"endTime":515.36,"body":"if my numbers are good, then I'm good, then I'm gonna excel,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":515.92,"endTime":519.24,"body":"and that you work and work and work towards having these beautiful numbers"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":519.24,"endTime":521.74,"body":"which can't break an egg, and I remember I was at a Christmas"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":521.74,"endTime":526.18,"body":"party, this poor guy. Okay, so I had a couple of glasses of wine me,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":526.18,"endTime":532.0,"body":"so my humor gets a little sassier or we had been having conversations"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":532.0,"endTime":535.56,"body":"about him working so hard on his TrackMan numbers, and so he wanted"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":535.56,"endTime":537.86,"body":"to give me his results at the end of the season,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":537.86,"endTime":540.02,"body":"and next time I saw him was at this Christmas party,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":540.3,"endTime":543.1,"body":"and he said to me, he's like, \"Kathy,\" he goes, \"My TrackMan, numbers"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":543.1,"endTime":546.14,"body":"have gone from this, this and this to this, and they have improved"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":546.14,"endTime":549.96,"body":"whatever indicators he was wanting to share with me, they improved so much"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":549.96,"endTime":553.9,"body":"and it's unbelievable, like all my lessons have been paying off and it's"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":553.9,"endTime":556.52,"body":"just amazing.\" And I said, \"That is so great. I'm like,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":556.52,"endTime":559.7,"body":"That's so good for you. So what is your handicap gone down?\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":559.86,"endTime":564.58,"body":"Right? Now, keep in mind, he's probably at high teens on his handicap,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":564.92,"endTime":568.1,"body":"and he looked at me lik e I stole his puppy,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":569.72,"endTime":572.56,"body":"and he just is... The eyes got really big and his face kinda"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":572.56,"endTime":575.8,"body":"dropped, his mouth opened a little bit, and he just stared me like"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":575.8,"endTime":577.74,"body":"he had this epiphany at the same time"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":578.26,"endTime":582.28,"body":"that he said, \"Well, my handicap hasn't gone down at all,\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":582.28,"endTime":585.54,"body":"but his TrackMan numbers are great, and he was obsessed all year about"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":585.54,"endTime":589.54,"body":"his TrackMan numbers. So TrackMan, while I think it's fun and it can"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":589.54,"endTime":593.08,"body":"be a great tool. It's definitely not an indicator of your ability to"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":593.08,"endTime":596.24,"body":"perform or if your handicap is gonna go down. So I think some"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":596.24,"endTime":599.92,"body":"of the technology that we can do, while it has a purpose,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":599.92,"endTime":602.92,"body":"it can also breed some perfectionists, 'cause I know a lot of people"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":602.92,"endTime":606.14,"body":"who are very obsessed with what their numbers are out there,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":607.12,"endTime":612.1,"body":"and that is, that's intolerance to be anything other than perfect."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":613.26,"endTime":615.78,"body":"So Brene Brown, if you don't know who she is using an American"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":615.78,"endTime":618.52,"body":"researcher and she's written some books, one of them is \"The Gifts of"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":618.52,"endTime":621.9,"body":"Imperfection,\" and she's a quote about perfectionists that I wanna read"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":621.9,"endTime":625.48,"body":"you from her data and her research. She said, \"What emerged for me"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":625.48,"endTime":629.5,"body":"in the data is that perfectionism is not about striving for excellence or"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":629.5,"endTime":633.9,"body":"healthy striving, it's a way of thinking and feeling that says this,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":634.84,"endTime":639.44,"body":"'If I look perfect, do it perfect, work perfect and live perfect,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":639.82,"endTime":645.56,"body":"I can avoid or minimize shame, blame and judgment'\". And that's really what"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":645.56,"endTime":649.24,"body":"it's about. Perfectionism is a fear of failure, a fear of disappointment,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":649.24,"endTime":653.54,"body":"a fear of rejection, we're intolerant of feeling that,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":654.2,"endTime":657.74,"body":"whether it's how we're going to treat ourselves or we're worried what other"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":657.74,"endTime":662.18,"body":"people are going to think. Right, that's why when you have a healthy"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":662.18,"endTime":667.12,"body":"standard of reaching high standards, rather, right, then you have your own"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":667.12,"endTime":672.7,"body":"back, you don't have a fear of making mistakes. That's the big difference,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":672.71,"endTime":676.14,"body":"Brene goes on to say that, \"Perfectionism is the ultimate fear.\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":676.82,"endTime":679.51,"body":"She says that, \"People who are walking around as perfectionist, they're"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":679.52,"endTime":682.6,"body":"ultimately afraid that the world is going to see them for who they"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":682.6,"endTime":686.98,"body":"really are, and they won't measure up.\" It's so interesting,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":687.92,"endTime":690.88,"body":"right? We have so many fears around the game of golf,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":691.3,"endTime":695.62,"body":"really fears of making mistakes, fears of being disappointing, maybe people"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":695.62,"endTime":700.68,"body":"who are supporting you, fears of other people judging you for your score,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":701.38,"endTime":704.94,"body":"or where you hit a golf ball when you're teeing off in front"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":704.94,"endTime":707.16,"body":"of other people, we have so much fear about what they'll think about"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":707.16,"endTime":713.58,"body":"where that ball went, all of that is so restrictive for us being"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":713.58,"endTime":716.0,"body":"able to take our best swings on the golf course,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":716.66,"endTime":719.98,"body":"it's such an opposite what we're afraid of doing, we're doing,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":720.4,"endTime":722.6,"body":"because we can't possibly take our best swings."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":724.26,"endTime":726.46,"body":"I remember I coached this girl in college and"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":727.5,"endTime":729.36,"body":"she told me that she said All she wanted to do is play"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":729.36,"endTime":732.22,"body":"a perfect rounder golf, she just wants to play... Perfect. Perfectly."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":733.02,"endTime":737.76,"body":"Whatever is perfect. And I said, \"Okay.\" I said, \"Let's define perfect."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":738.2,"endTime":740.56,"body":"Let's start that, or we're on the first call, tummy, tell me what"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":740.56,"endTime":742.82,"body":"your round looks like, what does... Define perfect.\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":743.4,"endTime":745.88,"body":"She said, \"Well, I hit most of the balls in the fairway,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":746.44,"endTime":748.88,"body":"and then I hit it on the green,\" I said, \"What club you"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":748.89,"endTime":750.88,"body":"hit in?\" She goes, \"Seven iron for the most part,\" I said,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":750.88,"endTime":752.652,"body":"\"Okay, so where are you hitting it?\" She goes, \"You know, in the"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":752.7,"endTime":757.48,"body":"close... 10, 15 feet.\" And I said, \"Okay, great.\" And she said,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":757.48,"endTime":760.26,"body":"\"And then what's the rest around look like?\" And she goes, \"When I chip,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":760.26,"endTime":762.32,"body":"I'm chipping it in close.\" I said, \"Well, wait a minute."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":763.14,"endTime":767.24,"body":"It's like you're chipping, that means you missed a green.\" And I said, \"That's"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":767.24,"endTime":770.7,"body":"not perfect.\" She was like, \"Well, yeah, I'm gonna miss some greens.\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":770.7,"endTime":772.6,"body":"I'm like, \"You are? I'm like, Who says?"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":773.26,"endTime":776.86,"body":"Perfect is technically, in golf, is really holing every second shot,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":778.08,"endTime":780.62,"body":"and if you're long enough, maybe holing them on par fives,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":780.9,"endTime":783.86,"body":"so for double eagles, depending on how far you hit it.\""},{"speaker":"was","startTime":784.16,"endTime":790.28,"body":"Right? That's technically perfect. It's not possible. I don't know. Maybe?"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":790.28,"endTime":795.9,"body":"Is it possible? It's never been done. The odds are so remote"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":797.14,"endTime":801.56,"body":"of that ever happening. So the point here is that we define perfect."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":802.68,"endTime":805.62,"body":"You get to define perfect. I get to define it. When I"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":806.2,"endTime":809.86,"body":"turned in that poster, I got to define which version of my first"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":809.86,"endTime":815.6,"body":"podcast was good enough to upload it to the platform I got to decide."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":816.08,"endTime":819.24,"body":"You get to decide what's perfect, she decided what was perfect,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":819.24,"endTime":822.72,"body":"which was so interesting, which was allowing her to make a certain number"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":822.72,"endTime":826.48,"body":"of bogies. I've had other clients who told me that anything under 80"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":826.48,"endTime":833.58,"body":"is perfect, so interesting. It's so interesting that it's really about how"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":833.58,"endTime":838.24,"body":"we decide what is perfect and that we're willing not to beat ourselves"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":838.24,"endTime":842.32,"body":"up over that, that we won't judge ourselves for anything worse than that,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":844.18,"endTime":846.92,"body":"but the more pressure that you put on yourself"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":847.84,"endTime":851.16,"body":"to play \"Perfect Golf,\" you can't play \"Perfect Golf,\" it's impossible,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":851.52,"endTime":854.68,"body":"it's impossible for you to swing your best when you have that pressure"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":854.68,"endTime":858.34,"body":"on yourself not to make a mistake. What if you could go out"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":858.34,"endTime":862.1,"body":"and just really be super tolerant of your mistakes? And enjoy the process,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":862.1,"endTime":865.4,"body":"enjoy figuring out how to make a par or birdie from a missed"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":865.4,"endTime":869.04,"body":"shot where you could have your own back the whole way around and"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":869.04,"endTime":872.7,"body":"enjoy the round and have fun, and no matter what you score,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":872.7,"endTime":876.64,"body":"it wasn't relevant to your self worth or your identity or any of"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":876.64,"endTime":880.32,"body":"it, wouldn't the game be so much more fun? Wouldn't you play so"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":880.32,"endTime":884.36,"body":"much better? Is just something that I want to shed some light on."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":884.36,"endTime":887.1,"body":"I want you to notice where perfectionism is showing up for you"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":887.92,"endTime":891.58,"body":"off the golf course and on the golf course, notice that how it"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":891.58,"endTime":894.56,"body":"is a fear, it's a fear of failure, a fear of disappointment,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":894.56,"endTime":899.44,"body":"of rejection of people judging you. Of you judging yourself,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":900.6,"endTime":904.48,"body":"which boils down to really your identity, your identity"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":905.2,"endTime":909.56,"body":"as a golfer, your identity and self worth, because the greater that is,"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":909.76,"endTime":912.85,"body":"the more tolerant you are of other people judging yourself, the more..."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":912.885,"endTime":915.52,"body":"And you'll have your own back, the more you'll be willing to make"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":915.52,"endTime":918.54,"body":"mistakes and fail, and when you can do that..."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":919.16,"endTime":922.06,"body":"You can play your best golf. So I hope this helps my friend."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":922.4,"endTime":924.06,"body":"Alright, best luck, I'll see you next week."},{"speaker":"was","startTime":925.22,"endTime":928.2,"body":"And if you get a chance, please make sure that you subscribe like"},{"speaker":"was","startTime":928.2,"endTime":929.68,"body":"or comment... Alright, I appreciate it."}]}