Mirror, Mirror on the Wall - Why Every School Leader Needs a Coach After All

Welcome to School Leader Soundbites, a podcast dedicated to empowering K-12 leaders with the latest insights and strategies in marketing and communications! Today, we are discussing Mirror, Mirror on the Wall - Why Every School Leader Needs a Coach After All!

Why coaching?
-We need a safe space to reflect and accountability partners
-We need to be preventing burnout and modeling for our staff

What coaches are NOT:
-Therapists, not clinically trained to deal with mental health or physiological issues but can be a good compliment to this therapy
-Do not share attorney-client privilege, so be mindful of what that looks like

What coaches ARE:
-Coaches give us a mirror which will help you see what your leadership looks like to others
-Gives an opportunity in a reflective space to have conversations about mindsets
-Provide safe, honest feedback for continuous mindset growth

Strategic Thinking :
-Coaches help you sharpen decision-making skills
-They are willing to have conversations about navigating complex issues, playing devil’s advocate to help you think through your response
-A strong coach is your accountability partner 

If you need any assistance with this, head to veronicavsopher.com. If you want more info, please contact me or drop questions in the comments and be sure to share this episode with your colleagues! If you have any questions or suggestions for future topics, I'm here to listen. Thanks for tuning in to School Leader Soundbites.

Find me at: https://www.veronicavsopher.com/

Social: @VeronicaVSopher

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Transcript

Veronica Sopher: 0:00

Veronica, hello, hello and welcome to School Leader Soundbites. I'm your host, Veronica Sopher And I have the honor ofcoming to you every week, dropping new episodes of our podcast where we talk about school communications, public relations, marketing and advertising. So if you are looking for some content on how to improve your school district's visibility strategy, you have found the right place. I come to you every week with more than 20 years of experience in school communications, and I love talking about all the things you need to know to improve your school district's presence in your community. So let's go ahead and get this episode started, but before we do, don't forget to hit subscribe. We don't want you to miss any episodes of school leader sound bites. And if you're watching on YouTube or Facebook, drop us some comments. All right. So let's start talking about coaching. Now, coaching before COVID was a little bit different than post COVID. So I remember before COVID, there were a few superintendents and leaders that I was working with or friends with who were really utilizing coaching from an executive level perspective. In other words, they had found executive coaches who were helping them on their leadership journeys, who were helping them to become better communicators, more reflective, and it was really making the difference. In fact, I think that those of us who had coaching before COVID were more successful, if that's possible, during COVID and all those transitions, than those of us who were not. But regardless, we all made it through that transition or that period of time, and now we're in the K 12 space dealing with issues that are completely different, way more volatile and really dependent on what's happening at the national level. So we know that national politics play a huge part in people's tones and their reaction and how we engage with each other, and this absolutely trickles down onto the campus level. So as you're thinking about how you are nurturing and guiding your campus leaders, whether it's principals or assistant principals or dealing with folks at Central Office, the thing that we know that everyone needs the most is an advocate in their learning. We need a safe space to reflect on ourselves, on the work that we're doing, on the way we are communicating, on the way we are project managing. Those are all things that we need to be improving on. And I think everyone would agree with that. We also need a place where there's some personalized development. We need these the safe feedback loops that are going to help us grow. We need to focus on a continuous mindset. We need accountability partners in every space that we're in, and we need to make sure that we're preventing burnout, because we know that's one of the things that a lot of us struggled with in that leadership role. And more than anything, we need to be modeling for our staff. So let's take a step back and talk about what coaches are and what they're not. First, let me start with what coaches are not. Coaches are not therapists. They are not clinically trained to deal with mental health issues or some of those more physiologically connected issues that you might be struggling with, maybe anxiety. But coaching can complement any type of therapy that you're already getting, or support medical support that you're that you're already getting. So if you are in the market for a coach, make sure you have that conversation with them. It's really important to be open and honest. And the other thing I will tell you is that coaches also don't share that doctor patient privilege or the attorney client privilege. So if you are working with the coach, be mindful of what that looks like. And I always tell people who are looking for a coach that there's a couple things to look for. Number one, the type of training that they've gone through, whatever type of certification that they have, because there's a lots of good ones that are out there. You just want to make sure it's one that works for you. Works for you. And if it's important to you, then maybe find a coach that has been in the K 12 space, because they'll know the battles that you have been fighting against and the struggles that you've been having to feel torn within, and the types of environment that you're working in. So if that's important to you then find an executive coach or a professional coach that is has been in the K 12 space. Now that's not to say that there aren't really great coaches that are not in the K 12 space, and I can tell you for from experience that I've had two phenomenal coaches, one from the K 12 space, and one who was not. And I learned and grew in working with both of them, and it made a huge difference, not only in my own mindset, but in the way that I led and managed teams. Superintendents, as you are onboarding you leaders into your system, remember that we can all use a thought partner, especially as we are on. Into a new district or into a new role, having a thought partner there to just bounce ideas off of and get some one on one. Coaching is crucial to optimizing your leader, especially as we deal with budget crunches and polarizing narratives in our community. If you want to learn more about our thought partner Alliance, then make sure you click the link below to give your team that extra support they need with the thought partner Alliance. Now let's go back to reflective space and what that means. Coaches give us a mirror, and that's important. They help us see what it is that other people are seeing, because we might have an impression of what it is we look like, how we sound like, or how we're coming across, and a good coach will hold that mirror up to you so that you can see what other people are seeing, and it may be on point or it may not be what you thought it was. And so they help you have that conversation without judgment and in a way that helps you identify goals and strategies to shift the way you are coming across. You know, it's all about mindset. I often think about that story that you might have heard speakers talk about sometimes, where two brothers on Christmas day were coming downstairs and they were all excited to open their presents, and the one brother sees a pile of manure, and he's just so frustrated and angry and mad at Santa Claus for this pile of manure that's underneath their tree, and he's angry and upset. And the other brother sees the exact same thing and says, Wow, this means there must be a pony nearby. So it is the glass half empty, half full conversation, and we do have the ability to shift how we think about conversations, and so working with the coach gives you an opportunity in that reflective space to have some of those conversations. And really, at the end of the day, it's about professional, personalized development, right? Every learner has our own unique style of learning. Some of us need to hear things over and over. Some of us need an additional time to process feedback that's been given to us. Some of us are visual learners. Some of us are auditory learners. So when you're working with a really good coach, they can tap into how you learn best and help have these conversations in a way that will really move your learning further faster, right? So it's that personalized development that's what you need to be looking for in a coach, and then, of course, that continuous mindset. As educators, we're lifelong learners. We talk about it all the time. We publicly say that our students, whether through a graduate Profile of a Graduate or whatever type of document we create about the learners in our district, we literally outline growth mindset as part of it, and sometimes we even do that when we talk about what our employees should be doing and how they should be operating in our district. So we have to practice what we preach. We have to continuously be looking at ways to make improvement, adapting and learning to what's happening, because things are moving quickly. You know, in the state of Texas, where I'm based, out of our legislature meets every two years, and we have to quickly adapt to legislation that's changing. We have to shift our processes. And sometimes it's a pretty heavy lift, and more times than not, it's not funded. So those unfunded mandates can really challenge what it is we're doing, and so we have to have a continuous growth mindset when we're looking at some of those bigger projects that we have to take on. And then I mentioned safe feedback loops, and what a good coach will do is offer honest feedback that is confidential in the setting, and it allows leaders to really tackle some of our own blind spots that we might have and adjust the approach that we want to take without risking our reputation. And so if you are working on your communication style, this is a great place to practice how you deliver that communication and share survey results that you might be getting from your team or the people that you lead, and really digesting it and figuring out how you can make improvements in a way that helps you see that there's an opportunity for growth and that there is light at the end of the tunnel, because we are not Always set in our ways, and we know that dendrites can be we can go in and we can shift the way we think about things and the way that we process information, and so it's just a matter of retraining our brain and having crucial conversations that will make such a huge difference. So now let's talk about some of the strategic thinking that comes along when you're working with a coach. Coaches help you sharpen those decision making skills, and they are willing to have conversations about really complex issues, navigating complex issues, playing difficult devils advocate, challenging some of your initial thoughts and positions on a time. Topic, just so you can really think through all of the variables that might come up with an issue that you're thinking about. So having that thought partner really someone who's strategic, who's willing to listen to what you have to say, and then help you think through all the pitfalls or all of the challenges or responses or rebuttals that might come with that sometimes we need somebody to step outside of the conversation so that we have confidence while we're inside the conversation to restructure it and make it more efficient and more effective. And really, at the end of the day, a good, strong coach is a is your accountability partner, right? It's the person who said, Now, you said you were going to do this by this date. We wrote down these goals. We're tracking it, and let's identify if you're moving the needle. And so whether you're looking at improving your campus culture or your district culture, or implementing a new initiative, the accountability partner will look at those benchmarks that you've set and decide if you are keeping your word, and if there is some opportunity for you to refocus your efforts, maybe you have, maybe you missed a deadline, and it's okay to miss a deadline, but you've got to be able to go back and recalibrate and say, Okay, now, what are we going to do to get this project back on track and make sure that we are putting together a process that's going to make a difference and is going to be effective. And that's really hard to do when you are balancing a lot of balls in the air, and as a superintendent or an executive a cabinet member or even a campus leader, sometimes the biggest concern is burnout, and we all want to prevent burnout. Coaching helps you identify what some of those boundaries are, so that you're taking care of yourself, right? You're prioritizing your self care. You're avoiding burnout. You know when there are high stakes issues coming up? You know when things are going to be emotionally draining and there's going to be a lot of demand from the campus and some of your staff. So helping you plan ahead. And you know, a great example of that is when I was doing a lot of traveling, my coach said, Okay, you're going to be on the road for about 15 days and only home for two. What are you going to do to make sure you are taking care of yourself? Are you going to be building in dedicated email time. Are you going to build in some of your nutrition and what that what that's going to look like? Oh, you're going to a couple of conferences. Let's make sure you pick restaurants where you're going to be taking some of your clients. And I look at the menu ahead of time so you know what's going to be a good option, right? Because when you're tired and you're exhausted, sometimes you don't make the best choices. But one of my favorite things that my coach had me do was identify the physical toll on my body as I was traveling from district to district, and I built in chiropractic adjustments and massages, and it made a world of difference, because then I could show up at the district I was supposed to show up in fully refreshed and ready to engage high energy and pouring all of myself into the training that I was doing in that district. And so making sure that you have a system in place to prevent burnout is going to be key to your success. So a good coach will make sure you're doing that. And then I talked about modeling for staff, and that's really the one that's most important. By actively engaging in coaching, you're setting a great example for all of your staff at every level, your office staff, your teachers, your principals, everyone that that is in your system, you're showing them that seeking growth opportunities is healthy. It's productive, it makes a difference, and it can really shift the entire energy of a campus and or a department. So modeling that type of behavior is going to make a huge difference on your leadership journey. So if you don't have a coach, I highly recommend you look for one. I know a lot of the state organizations have coaching models built in if you are a school administrator, and there's a lot of places that you can do some research and find out where people have got their coaching certifications. And of course, if you're looking for a coach, I highly recommend you check out some my blog posts so you can learn about how I coach and the way that I focus a lot of my sessions. So more information on that can be found at Veronica V sopher.com so I hope this information was helpful to you. Leaders. Don't forget, if you don't have a coach, be open to getting one. For not only you, but for those that you lead. You want to provide a reflective space for people with some personalized development. It's all about that continuous growth mindset, having a safe place for feedback, and having a thought partner who is doing some of that strategic thinking along with you, and being an accountability partner. That's really important, because at the end of the day, we want to prevent burnout, and model for our staff what it looks like to be coachable. So with that, I'm going to wrap up this episode of School Leader Soundbites. If you are listening on the podcast, make sure you hit subscribe. We don't want you to miss any episodes of School Leader Soundbites. And if you are watching on YouTube or Facebook, drop some comments. I would love to connect. Be sure to reach out to me at veronicavsopher.com and if you are looking for a coach, make sure you reach out. We'll talk to you soon.