The Midsters Podcast

24. Conquer Your Bucket List

October 26, 2022 Season 1 Episode 24
The Midsters Podcast
24. Conquer Your Bucket List
Show Notes Transcript

This week's episode is all about challenging yourself in midlife.  Bucket Lists are a great way to do this - they help us identify goals, experiences, and milestones.  But a lot of us have bucket lists that we are going to get to that elusive future 'someday'.    Tish and Ellen challenge each other to take one thing off their bucket list today - and just do it.  They each share why they picked it, what it means to them, and how they are going to accomplish it. 

Obsessions:
Tish - Tik Toc Buffalo video run to the clouds!
Ellen - Clinique's best-selling lip gloss since 1971 - Black Honey!
The book Ellen mentions on surfing: Rockaway, Surfing Headlong Into A New Life

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Ellen Gustafson:

Welcome back to the Midsters Podcast. I'm Ellen with my co host Tish, and today's episode is all about continuing to challenge yourself. Most of us have a bucket list that we're always going to get to in the future. But today's episode is about attacking that bucket list. Now, rather than put it off to that elusive some day, Tish and I are selecting one item from our bucket lists and challenge each challenging each other to take action today.

Tish Woods:

Ellen, I am so glad that we are dusting off our bucket list and actually talking about this today. And it's really motivated me i It has made me so excited to talk about what I want to do from my bucket list. I can't wait to hear what you're going to pull off your bucket list.

Ellen Gustafson:

I no years in the future when I'm an empty nester when I have more money when I have a partner, you know, putting things off year after year and just like you, I'm happy to dust it off and really take a look at it. But before we get to our selections, let's take a peek at our weekly obsessions. Tish What do you have for me this week?

Tish Woods:

Okay, so my obsession this week was actually a little clip I saw on TikTok about a story about the animal buffaloes you know, I gotta I gotta clarify that being from Buffalo. Not Buffalo, New York. Not Buffalo, New York. But these are where the the buffalo roam. So, in it, I just loved it because it really spoke to what energizes me. So he was talking about how buffalos run towards storms. Right now buffaloes hate storms and they hate rain. They hate getting wet, right? But they have learned that when they see storm clouds, they run towards them. Because they know that if they do that, they will spend the least amount of time in the storm. Okay. But if they run away from the storm clouds, what's going to happen is eventually that those storm clouds are going to catch them. And now they're in the storm longer, right? So I think that we really can learn so much from the Buffalo's difficult times are always going to come our way, right? And we need to instead of avoiding it, stead of putting it on a shelf and you know, putting it to the side. We need to look at it, run at it and and deal with that turmoil and conflict head on, because we're going to spend less time in it if we do it that way.

Ellen Gustafson:

Wow. Okay, I will post the link to that tic toc in our show notes. And I have to say here at midlife I've learned to be so much more direct, just like those buffalo. Good lesson there for us.

Tish Woods:

Yes. Now Ellen, what about you? What is your obsession this week?

Ellen Gustafson:

Well, it always cracks me up because we have such opposite of obsessions. But the weather has finally changed here in Northern California, where it's getting a little humid.

Tish Woods:

It's not a 90 degree fall day anymore.

Ellen Gustafson:

Nope. It is a little cool in the morning and the evening and my lips have gotten chapped and it made me pull out my favorite Clinique black honey lip gloss. Now this is a lip gloss that has been around since 1971. Almost as long as we have it's one of those colors. That just looks good on. Anyone hands down.

Tish Woods:

Now, what's the name of it again?

Ellen Gustafson:

It's called Black honey, black honey.

Tish Woods:

You know Clinique has this amazing ability to come up with colors that just complement everyone's complexion. Yeah, my, my best friend Judy. She for years and years and years, she wore Clinique Pink Chocolate, and I don't care who wore that color. It went with their complexion. And so black honey is not one that I am familiar with. And I gotta go out and try it. You know me and honey.

Ellen Gustafson:

That's right. That's right. I'll also put a link to the black honey clinic lipglass on our show notes. But before we jump in to talk about our bucket lists, if you're enjoying our podcast, please take a minute to rate and review it, wherever you listen, it would really help us out. And we'd appreciate it right Tish,

Tish Woods:

we're always trying to spread the word. So definitely, we want to hear from you. And you can also share it, there are three little if you do Apple, which most of our listeners do, if you to Apple, there's three little dots at the top corner, right hand corner. And if you click on those, you can actually see a Share button. You can text it to someone, you can put it on your Facebook, you can send it. And my thing is, you know, if you love an episode, or you think an episode would really be helpful to somebody, share it, you know, word of mouth is the best advertisement we can get. So we would appreciate any of it. Thanks, guys. Yeah, that's right. So bucket lists Tish bucket list. You know, I had a really good work friend, Angie Bell. And she was the first person I knew that had an active bucket list. I mean, she was

Ellen Gustafson:

Well, I'm like Angie, I have an active bucket constantly adding things to her bucket list, doing things crossing them off. She, she was one of the most inspirational people in terms of self challenging herself. And I just loved her, she's the one I went to do No Pants on the Train with that was on the bucket list. So I love this idea of a bucket list. And if you don't have one, you really need to get one. Because there's something so powerful about putting something down on paper that you want to do it plants that seed in your thoughts. It, it's more likely for you to accomplish something when you write it down. So Bucket List. But Ellen, I'm list. So I appreciate her very much. And I'm always adding or, dying to hear what is the one thing that you're pulling off you know, learning about an experience that somebody's doing. And I really like them because they really help you that bucket list and putting into reality? figure out like milestones, right? And experiences and it makes it real. So I'm just gonna put it out there that I'm a bucket list person, right? I'm not having to create one, I got one. But I'm just really thinking about this when we decided to do this episode. And there's a couple of travel experiences that I have on my bucket list, two very opposite things. One is walking to Santiago trail in northern Spain, and the other is going to Mount Rushmore. Anyone who knows me knows that I've been dying for some reason to go to Mount Rushmore. But because of the time of year, and me not having much vacation, I decided to pick something that's like a learn. I want to learn something I'm not going anywhere right now, really. So my bucket list challenge is to learn how to dance.

Tish Woods:

Oh, what kind of dancing.

Ellen Gustafson:

Well, I am going to do salsa, and Merengue a because out here in the Bay Area. I think there's a lots of opportunities to do it. Um, lots of clubs, lots of places. But I I just want to say that I've always been envious of people who can dance. And this is my whole life. We have a college friend, just a shout out to Kristen Baker, who has just always been able to dance. Oh, he's been able to amazing, amazing dancer I we used to call her the solid gold dancer back in the day.

Tish Woods:

Now we're really dating ourselves.

Ellen Gustafson:

We are she always had a couple of moves, you know. And the thing about dancing, I think I've always been reluctant to do it. Kind of because I'm by myself. I'm more of a bench, you know, on the bench as I think you'd say Tish. And so I've really thought this would be something good to challenge myself and pull myself out of my comfort zone.

Tish Woods:

Wow. I love that. I love that you're doing that. Now, let me ask you, are you planning to do this just on your own? Did you get someone to do this with you?

Ellen Gustafson:

That's a good question too. I'm going to do this on my own. And I do know of a friend of a friend who recommended a dance studio just a few towns over and she said she had done some west coast swing lessons there. And she went on her own and it was a great experience plenty of women plenty of men And they separate out the couples. So, you know, it's not the kind of awkward thing if you go on your own. So I'm doing this challenge solo.

Tish Woods:

I love that you're, you know, so many times I think, you know, again being single and I am as well, you tend to say will because you don't have anyone to go with, you don't do it that you can. So so you can like these dance studios, you don't have to bring a partner, right?

Ellen Gustafson:

Nope, not at all. And you know me when I commit to something? I'm starting next week.

Tish Woods:

So okay, so you're going next week? You're going on your own? Yeah, I love this. This is awesome.

Ellen Gustafson:

Yeah. And I, I really, always, you know, think about when I was young, really young. I did tap and jazz and ballet. I think like everybody I did Bhutan, you know, and I think about that fondly. You know, we've we've often talked about how good it is to think about what you enjoyed when you were young, and kind of pull that back up into your life. And so I think dancing is one of those things that I really reflected on. And, you know, I think I'm going to surprise some of our friends and bust out a few moves here at some point of this.

Tish Woods:

Now, you know, I'm all about like, the whole experience. Are you gonna get an outfit in the good shoes?

Ellen Gustafson:

You know, it's all about the outfit.

Tish Woods:

For me, it is I don't know, I don't know about anyone else always about the outfit. I mean, gosh,

Ellen Gustafson:

I'm gonna have to go the first time. I don't even know what the outfit would be. But you bet on getting the outfit.

Tish Woods:

Something's got to have ruffles. It's got to be like a skirt with ruffles that that's in my mind. I don't know why

Ellen Gustafson:

And to shoe with the heel.

Tish Woods:

Okay, so you've already got you're good. You're going next week? Yeah. And how long are these lessons? There?

Ellen Gustafson:

We're about an hour and 15 minutes. And you know, I thought it's a group lesson, I thought that I might need to start with a couple of private lessons because I'm so nervous about how bad I could be. But I'm just diving in I figure other people are really beginners there, too. And so I think on our next podcast, I can come back and report to everybody how my first salsa lesson went.

Tish Woods:

So what do you think the biggest challenge for you is going to be walking into that first lesson?

Ellen Gustafson:

I think it's going to be there alone. You know, not a friend, not a you know, a dance partner. But really just, you know, being alone. It's the fear of the unknown. I think as soon as I get there, and I experience it, I'll feel super comfortable. But yeah, I have a little bit of nervousness around that.

Tish Woods:

So you're like the buffalo in the storm. You see, you see the storm cloud, you see the class over there. And you're gonna you're just going to charge on through it. I love it.

Ellen Gustafson:

It's so true. It's something about me. So Challenge accepted.

Tish Woods:

I love that. Now, when is the last time you took a dance lesson?

Ellen Gustafson:

I think I was four or five.

Tish Woods:

And when when's the last time you went dancing?

Ellen Gustafson:

It's been way too long. You know, I feel so much joy when we used to go out dancing. And even I have a friend here who moves the furniture out of her living room and has some, you know, funk dance parties? I've done that a few times are just, yeah, nothing. It's like some good funk music and an empty wooden floor. And we can just go for hours laughing with that, but I have not done a proper you know, like a dance class in forever. So I think there's something to dancing. It's it's really primal. And it just, it brings so much energy. The dancing brings so much good energy and vibes.

Tish Woods:

Absolutely. I'm so excited for you. Not just the you know, challenging yourself getting out of your comfort zone. Another great form of exercise, but a great way to meet new people. You know, I just love that, that you're going to have that experience.

Ellen Gustafson:

Well thanks Tish. Now I have to say I cannot wait to hear what is on your bucket list challenge.

Tish Woods:

Okay, so I think You're not going to be a surprise on what it is. But my bucket list is, I have, for a very long time, wanted to learn how to surf. So you know that, yeah, so I'm going to be doing that. And for me, it's not just an activity. For me, it's truly this this zen experience of becoming one with the ocean, one with the sea, to be on a board and be part of the power of that wave, as it's cresting and moving towards the beach. There's just something incredibly spiritual about it. That drives me to want to be be able to do that. So on now, for me, it's not going to be as easy as I think with you going to

Ellen Gustafson:

your studio down the street, right? Yeah, the studio

Tish Woods:

mine is going to take a couple pieces to get me prepared to be able to do this. So I have really spent the last two years working on my physical and mental motional health all around. And I just have gotten into this unbelievably happy place in feeling physically good and stuff. But there are still a few areas that I need to work on. And I've known this for a little bit. And, and I knew I really need to start working on my core, like more strength, and my flexibility. So I knew the kind of the next steps for me, were getting in the gym working with weights, and to start doing yoga. And I've been talking about it and I you know, that's it, this taking this on on the bucket list is going to push me to do these other things. Because for me, surfing is the epitome of reaching all these health goals, right, where it comes together,

Ellen Gustafson:

and you're reaching it on the water, which is the place that's very spiritual for you.

Tish Woods:

It's very spiritual. There's something and and I've heard this many times, that there's something about hearing the waves at the beach, that resets your body's chemistry, that the body gets into hearing that rhythm of the waves. And that's why you always feel more peaceful at the beach. As you walk along the ocean, it's very peaceful experience for people because their bodies are resetting to that the natural rhythm of the waves. That's what I heard, I've always felt it. Something always draws me to the beach. So this is a huge challenge for me. And I think it's really going to be the epitome of reaching all of these goals. Because it's all about the pop up.

Ellen Gustafson:

That's about the pop up. Well, I was gonna say when you were out here with your son, Liam, about a year and a half ago, he did a few surf lessons that we watched from, from the beach from from the sand, and I could tell how much you really wanted to surf Tish. And I think we noticed with him that part, it's all about the pop up, right, it's all about the pop up, it's having that balance, and having that strength and that core strength to go from that laying position on the board to having your feet under you. And, you know, pushing yourself up and and popping your feet underneath you.

Tish Woods:

It's gonna be important to me, at least,

Ellen Gustafson:

I hear Yeah. You know, my book group read a book a couple years ago called Rockaway. And it's by an author who was going through a divorce. She lived, I believe in Brooklyn, and learned how to surf in Rockaway, New York right outside of outside of Brooklyn. And I'm, I'm hearing so many parallels to what you're saying today. And so I just sent you the book, I think you'll get it in a few days,

Tish Woods:

I'm getting it in the mail,

Ellen Gustafson:

you are getting it in the mail, because I think it'll be really inspirational to you to kind of track her journey. But I'm curious to see where do you think you're going to start surfing?

Tish Woods:

Okay, so that's going to be I was trying to make that decision. So kind of Eat Pray Love experience, I guess. Right? Right. All the the Goddess Retreats and again focused on women and some of their excursions start at $2,000 which is not bad considering all the other things that you get with it. So Trinity group becoming empty nesters next year.

Ellen Gustafson:

I think it sounds great. And I think you know you had me at Bali if I could say away. I mean, Tish, this is such a kind of a coming together of everything you've been working for around your physical, your mental health, and also how much you love travel and adventure.

Tish Woods:

Yeah, exactly. I think this marries all these things. And like I said, in the last few years, I've really had this, this soul searching journey where I become one with the waves.

Ellen Gustafson:

As you said, I love that. I hope you'll keep us all kind of posted on your journey and your progress. I think we'll check in with you. And do take that pop up video. We can go ahead and put that on our Facebook page too. Okay, I'm going to for sure. So I think we're saying let's do it. Don't put it off. Make that bucket list something for today. Right?

Tish Woods:

Make that bucket list. Think about what's on your bucket list. If you don't have one, start one. Think about what is it maybe from your youth, maybe you know those dance lessons when you were younger. Maybe it's something new maybe it's something a friend of yours does. What is some And what is that going to be for you, let us inspire you come along with this, this, you know, inspirational ride that we're all on. This is the time to do it, you know. And I think when we do these things to you know, especially those of us that are moms, our kids see this, they see that we are, you know, still pushing ourselves pushing the envelope,

Ellen Gustafson:

still growing, still learning,

Tish Woods:

always, always, and hopefully inspires them to do that for the rest of their lives as well.

Ellen Gustafson:

Excellent. Well, I hope our Midsters do put what their bucket list items are on our Facebook page. And remember, guys, if you're enjoying the podcast, as we said earlier, you can subscribe to it. You can rate it or you can review and in your review, leave a comment about something you'd like us to talk about. But I'd like to say till next time Midsters

Tish Woods:

Till next time Midsters