S3, Episode 11: Finding Your Purpose.

Have you ever noticed how often we connect our search for purpose with suffering rather than joy? The quest for meaning might be the most profound existential journey we undertake as humans, yet we frequently overlook the whispers of joy that could guide us toward our calling.

This episode challenges the conventional wisdom that purpose must be forged primarily through hardship. While Viktor Frankl's groundbreaking work "Man's Search for Meaning" rightfully acknowledges how suffering can clarify what matters most, we explore how joy serves as an equally powerful compass. When was the last time you felt fully alive, completely present, utterly yourself? Those moments aren't accidents—they're signposts pointing toward alignment with your deepest purpose.

Drawing from both ancient wisdom and modern insights, we unpack a practical four-step framework for discovering purpose: identifying what brings you genuine joy, recognizing your natural gifts and talents, determining who you're uniquely positioned to serve, and creating sustainable practices that keep you connected to your calling. This approach bridges spiritual traditions with contemporary understanding, showing how purpose emerges at the intersection of delight and service to others.

Whether you've been searching for years or are just beginning to ask the big questions about why you're here, this episode offers a refreshing perspective that honors both the wisdom gained through hardship and the guidance available through joy. Your purpose might not be found solely in what you survive, but equally in what you're called to create. Download our special reflection guide with journal prompts and a purpose-mapping exercise to take this exploration deeper, and remember: you were created for joy, on purpose.

Download your copy of the Joy Based Purpose Toolkit.

https://mysites.therapysites.com/0062436/storage/app/media/joy-based-purpose-journal-toolkit.docx

Transcript

Speaker 1 0:25

Greetings everybody and welcome back to the Counselor's Couch. I'm your host, calvin Williams, licensed professional counselor. You know what's funny? I recently did a Google search for finding your purpose and wow, I mean, there is an abundance of information out there. The book count alone was staggering, not to mention the workshops, the self-guided programs, the podcasts and more. But I'm going to caution you, be careful. There's a lot of external information out there to help you find an internal purpose. So I thought to myself, calvin, why haven't you done an episode on this topic yet? Well, here it is Another grain of sand on the beach of seeking purpose in life. To be honest with you, I've read several of these books in my own search and I think I'm not alone and if you're listening to this episode, then you're probably a fellow searcher. We are not alone. I think the abundance of information out there on this topic is evidence that we're not alone. Now it also tells me that there's a longing for an answer to this question. There's a yearning to understand.

Speaker 1 1:37

I believe our search for purpose is one of the great existential questions of our time. It's right up there with who am I? However, this is not a new trendy topic. Our search for purpose, and our search for meaning started long before Viktor Frankl's book Man's Search for Meaning, where he documents surviving a Nazi concentration camp during World War II, discovering that meaning can be found in suffering. He introduces logotherapy, a form of existential therapy centered on the pursuit of purpose as the core of psychological well-being. Now, for many of us, the search ultimately takes a spiritual direction. Our search for purpose and meaning can often be found in alignment with our faith, our beliefs and our value system. I personally believe that God has a purpose for me. Now, unfortunately, I can't say I've always been in alignment with it. What I do know is that, whether you're sitting under a tree, in a church pew or on a counselor's couch, a significant truth exists we need meaning to survive and even more, to thrive. Human beings need a purpose. In Frankl's book, which I highly recommend for anyone on a personal development journey, he shares that those who endured, those that survived the horrors of concentration camps weren't always the strongest people, but they were often the ones who clung to a sense of purpose, he wrote those that have a why to live can bear almost any how.

Speaker 1 3:17

Now, as I mentioned earlier, the search for purpose and meaning goes way beyond Frankl's teachings. In fact, the Greek philosopher Aristotle pondered the question in his early writings what is the essence of life? And his answer was to serve others and do good. Now compare these to what biblical scripture says in Ephesians, for we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do. It's powerful. Each perspective says we are here for a reason.

Purpose Through Suffering: Viktor Frankl's Perspective

Speaker 1 3:55

So I thought we could unpack the search for purpose and meaning in this episode. Now I hope that you'll have an open mind and cultivate a curiosity in your search for meaning. If you already know your purpose, then I hope this session will ignite an energy in you to act on it. But before we get started, let me remind you again nothing provided in this podcast implies a therapeutic relationship between counselor and client. It is solely for education and entertainment. I hope to empower you to become more self-aware and challenge you to create the life you desire.

Speaker 1 4:29

Counseling can help you overcome challenges, enhance your relationships and develop skills to create the life you desire. Counseling can help you overcome challenges, enhance your relationships and develop skills to lead the life you want. If you are considering therapy, then please reach out to a trained, licensed professional in your community. If you are interested in seeking counseling in the Monroe Louisiana area, or if you live anywhere in Louisiana and you are interested in participating in teletherapy with state-approved professionals, then contact the providers at HealthPoint Center. Change starts here. Psychology and Counseling Services. Healthpoint is a collaboration of independent professionals who are dedicated to improving your quality of life and guiding you on a positive path toward change. That's HealthPoint Center, located at 1818 Avenue of America, monroe, louisiana. So call today to inquire about services providers or book an appointment at area code 318-998-2700.

Speaker 1 5:23

Well, it's that time again. So pull up a cushion, kick off your shoes and grab a cup of coffee. Let's get started with the session. So what is your purpose? If you've asked yourself this question, well then you may be going through something, but of course that's a loaded statement, because I once heard a speaker say we are either going through something, been through something, or we're about to go through something. The truth of that statement still resonates with me. It's not about the something, it really is about the journey. For me, it's about how I go through it.

Speaker 1 6:02

Unfortunately, the question we are contemplating today lends itself more to the why of life. I believe it's a natural reaction to ask why, especially as we're going through something difficult, do you ever notice how you don't ask it when you're going through something pleasant or joyful? I guess very few people ask why did I win that lottery, or why did I get that promotion or raise? Our search for an understanding of why often comes when we struggle or experience something unpleasant why did this happen to me? Why didn't I get the raise? I guess it's natural, but it's also disappointing that we often attach our exploration of purpose and meaning to a struggle or suffering. So why do we so often tie our search for meaning and purpose to our suffering, and can we instead find purpose through joy? Well, let's begin with the obvious, because it's the most universally felt Suffering, pain, grief, loss.

Speaker 1 7:10

These are the places where many of us first become seekers. Now, why is that? Well, for one thing, suffering demands an answer. It disrupts the flow of our lives in a way that joy doesn't. It grabs us by the collar and says hey, wake up, pay attention to me. When things are going well, we rarely ask deep existential questions, but when things fall apart, our minds start racing, grasping for meaning, for comfort, for context. This isn't weakness, it's survival. It's how we process trauma and reassemble our identities when they've been shattered.

Speaker 1 7:48

Viktor Frankl wrote when we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourself. Frankl believed that humans could endure incredible suffering if they had a why, a reason to get up, a reason to go on, which is why his book remains one of the most powerful examples of how the soul can rise above circumstances. From a counseling perspective, I see this all the time People who come to therapy not because they're seeking purpose, but because they're suffering. And in the work we uncover that the suffering is often a signal not of brokenness but of longing, A longing to reconnect with something meaningful. It's no coincidence that some of the most profound biblical figures Job, david, paul discovered their purpose not in spite of their suffering, but through it. The Apostle Paul writes in the book of Romans we also glory in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character and character hope. Now, paul isn't glorifying pain for its own sake. He's pointing out the transformation that pain can create.

Why We Connect Purpose to Pain

Speaker 1 9:05

Suffering strips away the illusion of control, it reveals what we actually value, and it often brings us face-to-face with God in a way that comfort can't. But here's the thing Purpose doesn't have to be born in agony. So let's pull in some neuroscience for a moment. Our brains are wired to seek patterns and narratives, especially in times of distress. The prefrontal cortex, our center for reasoning, kicks in when we're trying to make sense of chaos. It's not just emotion driving us to ask why, it's biology, but here's the twist the same systems that help us find meaning in suffering can help us find meaning in joy if we train them to. And this is where we shift, because joy, unlike suffering, doesn't always demand explanation. It doesn't scream, it whispers, it slips in quietly and it's often unnoticed.

Speaker 1 10:08

Which brings us to the next question why don't we treat joy like a gateway to purpose? Well, there's a few reasons. First of all, joy is often perceived as fleeting. It doesn't feel like it has the same emotional weight as suffering. Another thing is our culture glorifies the struggle. We're told that only what's earned through pain is meaningful. And finally, I believe we don't pause to reflect on what feels good. It passes through us too quickly to study. But here's the truth Joy is a teacher too. In fact, joy is one of the most honest indicators of what matters to you. I mean, think about it. When do you feel most alive, most connected, most yourself. These aren't accidents, they're signals, they're clues.

Speaker 1 11:03

In Christianity we often treat joy as a reward for righteousness or something that comes only after enduring pain. But biblically, joy is not just an outcome, it's a calling, it's a fruit of the Spirit. In Nehemiah 8, verse 10, scriptures say the joy of the Lord is our strength. The psalmist wrote in chapter 16, verse 11, you make known to me the path of life. In your presence there is fullness of joy. Joy is not a side effect, it's a signal that we are in alignment with God's presence.

Joy as a Pathway to Purpose

Speaker 1 11:39

Jay Shetty, former monk and author of Think Like a Monk and Eight Rules of Love, says purpose is passion in service of others. That's beautiful and it also aligns with the biblical model of service and calling. God doesn't just call us to endure, he calls us to create, restore, build and bless. Jesus even said in the book of John 10, verse 10, I have come that they may have life and have it to the full. That includes suffering, yes, but also celebration, intimacy and fulfillment. So in searching for your purpose, consider that the things that light you up, when paired with a desire to help, heal or uplift others, become a powerful force for meaning. But let's take that deeper Now. Shetty introduces a powerful concept from ancient Hindu tradition called Dharma your natural calling, the intersection of your gifts, your joy and the world's needs.

Speaker 1 12:45

Well, in the Christian context we might call this spiritual gifting or God's will for your life. Paul writes in Romans we have different gifts according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is serving well, then serve. If it's teaching, then teach. Joy often accompanies the use of those gifts. When you're walking in your calling, it feels right, not just morally, but emotionally, spiritually and even physically. That feeling, that's alignment, that's purpose in action.

Speaker 1 13:23

Now, if you really want to understand purpose, well, let's look at the life of Jesus. You know, we often think of Christ as a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief, and yes, that's true. But we forget. Jesus also celebrated. He went to weddings, he shared meals, he told stories, he laughed with children, he loved deeply His life, held both sorrow and joy, because both are sacred. Hebrews 12, verse 2, says For the joy set before him. He endured the cross Not instead of joy, but because of joy. His suffering was purposeful, because it was connected to a larger vision of redemption and restoration. So too with us.

Speaker 1 14:13

The question isn't just what pain have you survived, it's also what joy are you being invited to create, to share and to protect? Now let's go back to Jay Shetty's work for a moment. He talks about ritualizing joy, building it into your day intentionally. Well, biblical scripture affirms this too. In the Old Testament, god instructed his people to celebrate regularly Sabbaths, feasts, festivals. These weren't optional, these were spiritual commands. Why? Because joy keeps us grounded, it reminds us who we are, it reconnects us to God's goodness. When we practice joy consistently, through gratitude, service, presence, we are obeying God's design for us. Now here's a reflection I often offer in therapy what if joy isn't a bonus in life but a guidepost? Now I want you to sit with that question for a moment. Where does your joy guide you?

Speaker 1 15:21

To help understand this concept, let's gently challenge the belief that purpose must come through pain. Can suffering lead to growth? Absolutely? But biblically we also see purpose come through vision in Nehemiah, through favor in the book of Esther, through obedience with Noah and through delight, david dancing before the Lord in 2 Samuel. Joy has just as much spiritual depth as grief. When we pay attention, you don't have to wait for a breakdown to begin building a meaningful life. Purpose is often portrayed as something we stumble into after suffering, but what if it could also be cultivated intentionally through joy, spiritual gifting and daily alignment with God's design? Now Jay Shetty suggests purpose arises when passion meets service, where your joy intersects with the needs of others. Well, the Bible echoes this, emphasizing that your gifts are not just for you. They're meant to bless others and to glorify God. Well, let's walk through a deeper four-step framework, based on Shetty's work that may be useful in helping you find your purpose.

Speaker 1 16:38

Step one what brings you joy? Psalm 37, verse 4, says Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. This verse isn't a formula for getting what you want. It's an invitation to let delight guide your direction. So ask yourself what activities make you feel energized instead of drained. What moments do you lose track of time because you're just so engaged? And finally, what brings a quiet sense of rightness, like you're exactly where you're supposed to be. Joy isn't selfish. It's often a spiritual compass pointing toward the space where you're most available to serve. So consider this reflection prompt what are three moments from the past month that brought you unexpected joy or deep satisfaction? And write your responses down for a deeper reflection.

Speaker 1 17:41

Step two what are your spiritual gifts and natural strengths? Romans 12, verse 6, says we have different gifts according to the grace given to each of us. Some of us are wired to teach others, to comfort. Some build, lead, write, organize, encourage. These talents aren't accidents. They're your toolkit for purpose. Now, how to identify your gifts? First, ask yourself what do people thank you for repeatedly? Next, what comes easily to you that's hard for others? And next, what activities make you feel spiritually awake when you're doing them? Now you can also take a spiritual gifts assessment or talk with a mentor or a pastor who knows you well. But I want to give you a biblical reminder Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others. And this is from 1 Peter, 4, verse 10. Now grab your notebook.

Speaker 1 18:42

Your reflection prompt for step two is what are five talents or qualities others have consistently affirmed in you? Now step three ask yourself who can you serve with this? Mark, chapter 12, verse 31. Love your neighbor as yourself. Joy and gifting alone aren't enough to create purpose. Service is the key that transforms talent into calling.

Speaker 1 19:10

Scripture often reminds us that true greatness comes through service. So ask yourself who needs what you naturally offer? Where does your joy solve someone else's problem? And which causes or communities break your heart or fire you up? God designed you not just to feel good but to do good. Our biblical example here comes from Esther, chapter 4, verse 14. Esther's beauty and position weren't for self-exaltation. They were, for such a time as this, her purpose awakened, when she realized who her gifts were meant to serve. So a reflection prompt who is already being blessed, comforted, helped or healed by your presence, even in the smallest of ways? Finally, step four how can you make it consistent and sustainable? Galatians 6, verse 9,.

Speaker 1 20:17

Purpose is not just a revelation, it's a discipline. The same is true in faith. Good intentions must be followed by steady obedience. It's not about massive impact overnight. It's about consistency, showing up in your calling, daily, weekly, faithfully. So ask yourself how can I create a space in my life to practice my purpose regularly? What rhythms or habits support this work? What boundaries or distractions need to be addressed? You know, jesus modeled this perfectly. He didn't just perform miracles on stages. He walked dusty roads, taught in quiet homes, and he lived his purpose in ordinary moments. Our reflection prompt here is what is a small, simple, regular practice that could help you stay rooted in your purpose.

Speaker 1 21:15

Now, if you've carried the belief that suffering is the only place purpose can be found, I invite you to lay that burden down. Yes, pain has wisdom, but so does peace. Yes, suffering shapes us, but so does peace. Yes, suffering shapes us, but so does celebration. Joy isn't the opposite of purpose. It's often the evidence of it. Now, as you listen for God's voice, don't just tune your ear to the pain. Listen for the laughter, the goosebumps, the moments of awe and connection. Those are important too, because in the end, your purpose might not be found in the things you survive, but in the things you're called to create.

Speaker 1 21:59

Thanks for spending time with me today on the Counselor's Couch. If this episode stirred something in you, then share it with somebody who needs the reminder that joy is spiritual, that purpose can be peaceful and that God's voice is present in both our tears and our laughter. Now, if you want to go deeper, I've created a reflection guide with journal prompts and a purpose mapping exercise based on everything that we just discussed today, including the scripture and that four-step framework from Shetty. You can find that linked in the show notes. Click on that and you can download a copy of that. Until next time, be well, be encouraged and remember you were created for joy, on purpose.

Speaker 1 22:40

And today I want to leave you with a quote from the Stoic philosopher Epictetus what is your profession? From the Stoic philosopher Epictetus, what is your profession? Being a human being? This is a grounding reminder that our purpose isn't always tied to status or achievement, but to showing up fully, ethically and compassionately. Remember, folks, life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. You are not alone. You're more capable than you will ever know, so embrace it. Live intentionally, love daily and laugh often. Do your best today and become what you can, because the world needs you.

Speaker 1 23:15

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