do the sex . Welcome to Masturbation Monday with me , annette Benedetti , your host for Locker Room Talk and Chats . This is your invitation to join me for coffee in bed and a candid conversation about the masturbation practice I'm developing to support my mental , physical and emotional health and help manifest my dreams . Masturbation Monday is a guide to self-pleasure , better sex and using the power of the pussy to open new doors to a better life . Today's topic is kinks . For the normal guy . These are five beginner-friendly ways to blow her mind that you're going to love too .
Speaker 1This
episode is listener , requested , expert approved and naughty . But make it nice . You know what I love ? I love it when men ask how they can expand their sexual repertoire so that they can be better , more adventurous lovers . Not just how to last longer or what moves gets her off the fastest , but how to actually step out of the conventional or vanilla zone and into the wild world of kink and pleasure , without feeling like they need to sign a sex contract or suddenly grow a man bun and start calling women goddesses . Not that there's anything wrong with that . You don't need to be kinky , you just need to be curious . This episode is for you . My curious , very normal guy who DM'd me and said that he was ready
to venture out of the common and into kinks for the average Joe . You are in the right place Today .
Speaker 1I'm walking you through five kinks that are beginner-friendly , science-backed because she secretly really really wants to experience these and guaranteed to spice things up without freaking you out . These are kinks she wants to try but probably won't ask for . Down of what it is a real myth that you probably believed . Easy , low pressure ways to try it , the stats and psychology behind why it works . And toy recommendations , because , well , I love tools for pleasure . And don't worry , if you are subscribed to my e-newsletter or my sub stack , then you will be receiving a article that is full of all of these toys and the discounts go along with them . And I'm going to take this opportunity to remind you that I am over on OnlyFans and there I am sharing my sex how-tos and demonstrations , also some audio , guided self-pleasure meditations and so much more to help you start having better sex tonight . You can find me there by my handle at TalkSexWithAnnette . You can also find me on Substack handle at talk sex with annette . You can also find me on substack at talk sex with annette . And , of course , scroll down to the notes in this podcast episode , where you will have all the links to find me everywhere you want to . This episode doesn't require leather pants , but it will provide you with better orgasms .
Speaker 1So if you are ready to take your bedroom game from basic to bold , let's get ready to talk about sex Cheers . Let's dive in with kink . Number one for the curious but conventional guy , it's the praise kink . Let's ease into this with something you're probably already halfway doing the praise kink . One well-timed , good girl can do more than an hour of thrusting . So what is it ? It's using affirming , sexy language to turn your partner on . Not , you're pretty , but you're making me so hard right now . Not good job , but you're such a good girl when you take me like that , it's confident , it's hot and it builds serious connection . So the myth that goes along with this is praise is just emotional fluff . Nope , according to a 2021 Kinsey Institute survey , 74% of women said verbal affirmation during sex increased their arousal and orgasm intensity , especially when the tone was dominant .
Speaker 1So how to try it ? Start during foreplay . Say things like you're doing so good for me , or I love watching your body respond to me , or me , or I love watching your body respond to me or no one else has ever gotten me this hard . Sometimes little white lies are okay . Then turn it up . You take me so well . Or look at you begging for more Dirty . Talk isn't just about what you say , it's about how you say it . So what toy can you pair with this ? To turn up the heat ? Try a satin blindfold and add in a little bit of sensory deprivation . She won't be able to see you , but she'll feel every word Kink . Number two for the average Joe anal play for her or for you . I know the thought of anal play makes many normal guys sweaty , and not in the good way . But once we debunk the myths it becomes a whole new world of pleasure . Look , you're not gay for liking anal , you're just built for it .
Speaker 1Anal play is a broad , broad topic . It consists of stimulating the anus or prostate using fingers , a cock , toys or a tongue . You can do it to her , she can do it to you . Either way it can result in incredible orgasms . There's so many myths around this . One , but maybe the most common is if I like anal , it makes me gay
Wrong . One , but maybe the most common is if I like anal , it makes me gay Wrong . Sexual orientation is about who you're attracted to , not where you like to be touched . Another myth is women don't enjoy . Actually , one in three women afford to enjoying anal play when it's done with consent , communication and lots of lube . So why it's hot ? The male G-spot , aka the prostate , is located just inside the anus and when stimulated , the most intense orgasm of your life well , it might be up there . Anal play can cause stronger , longer , more full-bodied orgasms . For her , anal stimulation increases pleasure on the vaginal walls , the internal clitoris and the G-spot , creating double the intensity .
Speaker 1So how do you get into it ? For her , start outside . Use lots of lube , go slow and pair it with clit stimulation . For you , try rooming external massage on the perineum or a small plug . So here are some toys you can pair with it . For her , try the B-Vibe Snug Plug . 2 . For you , we're going to start with the B-Vibe Novice Plug . It's small and it's sexy . Note I have done a full podcast episode on anal play . I'm going to link them below and send them out in my e-newsletters . It's great for beginners . It walks you through some of the basic starter things you can try all the way to the wild and you got to really be willing stuff .
Speaker 1Kink number three for men who are ready to go from dad mode to dom is light restraint , aka bondage . If you've ever had the urge to pin her wrists , you've already had a taste of this one . What is it ? It's bondage using handcuffs , rope or straps to restrict movement and build anticipation . It gives you control , slows things down and makes every sensation feel electric . When she can't't move , every touch hits differently . So what's a myth we need to debunk with this one ? Bondage is only for hardcore kinksters . Nope , 58% of people who identify as vanilla say they fantasize about being tied up .
Speaker 1This
one's more common than you think . So how can you dip your toe in the water with this one ? Start by using silky wrist restraints or an under the bed restraint system . Try verbal restraint Don't move , keep your hands above your head . Simple commands like that can evoke a strong reaction in both of you . Add in sensory play , blindfold her , then slowly tease with fingers , tongue or a vibe . There are so many toys that you can pair with this one , but for starters , get an under the bed restraint kit . It's really cool because you can leave it there , tuck the restraints in and nobody will even know that you've gone from conventional to kinky will even know that you've gone from conventional to kinky . Want to level it up even more . Get a tickler or a feather wand to add in some sensory play . All right , kink . Four for the normal guy .
Speaker 1Power dynamic play , with or without role play , ready to explore control , but not quite ready for costumes and characters ? Well , you don't have to be . So what is it ? Power dynamic play is about who's in control . One person leads and the other submits . Being dominant doesn't mean being a dick , it means being decisive . You can add role play boss , employee , teacher , student or you can do it as yourselves , with commanding language and energy .
Speaker 1So here are some myths that go along with this one . I need to be dramatic or good at improv ? Nope , the hottest power play often happens when you're just being
you , but more intentional and more in control . And look the stats back it up 65% of women fantasize about being dominated . 58% say they want their partner to initiate more sexually . That's a lot of women .
Speaker 1So how are you going to give it a try ? Let's start with no role play . Take the lead Simply give her commands . Say , take off your clothes , take them off slowly . Give her rules , say you're not allowed to come until I say You're not allowed to touch me there , until I tell you , touch me here , grab a hold of it , squeeze , use control words on your knees , say please , now , thank you . So how do you try it with role play ? Just tell her tonight I'm the boss , you're my secretary , use your space , the desk , the kitchen , the doorway it all becomes a stage . So what kind of toys can you pair with this ? Start with something like a faux leather collar . There are also role play prompt cards that you can buy . That can help you dip your toe in the water . Want to level it up and make her really happy ? Buy her some costume lingerie so she can get in the mood and play the part that you want her to play . All right , kink number five . Step into your daddy era . No diapers , all dominance .
Speaker 1We're talking spank and punishment . This one's a classic , but there's more to it than just a slap on the ass . Punishment doesn't have to hurt , it just has to build tension . So what is it ? Spanking equals impact , play . Punishment equals erotic control . It could be spanking or teasing , denial or rules she has to follow . So what is a myth that goes along with this one ? A . The most common is that it's degrading . Nope , with consent and care , punishment can be incredibly arousing .
Punishment can be incredibly arousing , emotionally releasing and even bonding . And look the stats back it up 57% of women enjoy being spanked . 35% say that they've fantasized about erotic punishment Again . That's a lot of women who want to experience this .
Speaker 1So how do you dip your toe in the water ? An easy way to start is by giving her a spanking during doggy style , or level it up with some over the knee punishment . You can also add rules If you squirm again , I'll have to start over . Another great approach is to spank and then praise Good girl , you took that so well , all right . Non-spanking punishment options there's orgasm denial for those women who orgasm easily . Give her a solid not . Yet you can also do some edging . Bring her close , then back off and repeat . Add in restraints , tie her up , touch her everywhere except for where she wants to be touched . You can also use verbal control . Tell her things like you have to ask before you come . There are so many toys you can pair with this one . Get a mini paddle , a flogger For the clip play . Consider the Womanizer Premium 2 . It provides that pleasure . Air tech that is going to bring her close to that orgasm You're going to deny her . You can also level it up with a butt plug for some combo play .
Speaker 1All right , I've given you five kinks for the normal guy , but I'm going to give you some bonus material here . Your bonus is stack your kink , spank her , then praise her for some punishment . Plus praise , kink , tie her up , whisper how wet she is , then role play . You've got restraint , plus dirty talk and dom energy . Try combining an anal plug plus restraint and then praise , throw in a spanking . We're looking at triple orgasm territory now .
Speaker 1You don't need more moves , you just need more layers . Look , kink doesn't have to be extreme , it just has to be intentional . You don't need more moves , you just need more layers . Look , kink doesn't have to be extreme , it just has to be intentional . You don't need whips or contracts or leather pants unless you want them . You need curiosity , communication and a little courage . These five kinks they're not just fun , they're effective . They build anticipation , deepen connection and take your sex life from good to holy shit . What just happened ? Try one , try two , combine a few and look if you need a cheerleader to support you through the process of trying out these kinks , or you're just looking for someone to help guide you through and support you through your own pleasure or sexual intimacy journey .
Speaker 1My books are open . I am offering pleasure and sex and intimacy coaching . You can find out more about that when you go to my website at TalkSexWithAnette . Of course , I always love to receive your questions and get you the answers that you are looking for . So if you listen to this episode and anything comes up for you , feel free to reach out to me . You can , of course , drop a comment below this video on
my YouTube channel , which is at TalkSexWithAnnette . You can DM me . You can scroll down to the link below and you're going to find my speak pipe . Send me a voice note . Of course , you can always email me at Annette at talk sex with annettecom . So until next time I'll see y'all in the locker room . Good luck getting kinky cheers .