Do the sex . I'm Annette Benedetti , host of the podcast formerly known as Locker Room Talkin' Shots . The show has a new name Talk Sex with Annette , but at its core , this is still your locker room . It's where we strip away shame , get curious and speak the unspoken about sex , kink , dating , pleasure and desire . Around here , nothing's off limits . Pleasure and desire Around here , nothing's off limits . These are the kinds of conversations we save for our boldest group chats , our most trusted friends and , of course , the women's locker room . Think raw , honest and sometimes unapologetically raunchy . If you've been here from the beginning , thank you , and if you're new , welcome to my podcast , where desire meets disruption and pleasure becomes power . Now let's talk about sex Cheers .
Speaker 1Today's Talk Sex with Annette topic is what to do before sex . So she's already craving you If you want her so turned on , she's practically pulling you into the bedroom . It starts way before you've ever touched her . The best sex starts hours before you touch her and most people men in particular miss that entirely . And if you are skipping this part , you are setting yourself up for sex . That's maybe , maybe good , but never unforgettable . Most guys think foreplay is a few minutes of kissing right before sex . Big mistake , the kind of foreplay that makes her crave you begins the moment she walks
in the door and oftentimes hours and hours before . And look , I'm not talking about vague , be romantic advice . I'm talking about moves backed by real science dopamine , oxytocin and , of course , what I've learned from coaching men , especially on how to create sexual anticipation so strong she's the one reaching for you . By the end of this , you'll have a step-by-step blueprint for building that craving the science behind why it works so you can do it with confidence . And the biggest before sex mistakes that kill her desire instantly , so you never make them again . But before we dive in , I want to remind you that I'm over on OnlyFans and there I'm sharing my sex and intimacy how-tos , demonstrations and audio guided self-pleasure meditations all so you can start having better sex and intimacy tonight and , of course , more orgasms . And you can also find me over on Substack doing a whole bunch of the same , and you can find me in both places under my handle at TalkSexWithAnette . And , of course , you could scroll down to the links in the description of this episode and you're going to be able to find me wherever you want to find me . I'm looking forward to seeing you there .
Speaker 1Look if you want her craving you before sex , you need to know exactly what to do and what will kill the mood . So let's dive in . Let's talk about how to make her crave you before you even touch her Cheers . Step one to the blueprint to how to make her crave you before sex is understanding the science . If you understand the brain , you can control the bedroom . Your goal before sex isn't just to turn her on , it's to create something called anticipatory pleasure , the sweet spot between wanting and having . We all know that sweet spot . We want to be there and we want to get her there . When you build anticipation , her brain releases dopamine . This is the chemical that makes her think about you , want you , and chase the reward . At the same time , oxytocin , the bonding hormone , rises from shared eye contact ,
touch and connection . Dopamine makes her want you , oxytocin makes her trust . You get both going and she'll crave you on every level . When dopamine and oxytocin rise together , you're priming her to respond to you faster and more intensely once things turn physical . So step two to the blueprint to making her crave you before you have sex is you've got to start hours before you see her . If you wait until you're in the bedroom to turn her . You're already too late . The craving starts long before you're in the same room .
Speaker 1First , send her mental trigger . Midday , send something short and non-explicit . For example , that look you gave me last night that was dangerous . Or don't make plans tonight . I've got something in mind . If you want her thinking about you all day , plant the fantasy and let her imagination do the work . This works because her brain fills in the blanks with her version of the fantasy , and the fantasies we create for ourselves are far more powerful than the ones we're given .
Speaker 1So step three for the blueprint for making her crave , you before sex is tap into her senses . Say I keep thinking about how you smelled last time or the way your skin felt under my hands is driving me crazy . Trigger her senses and her body will react before you've even touched . Her Sensory memory is so strong that when you reference a smell , a texture or even a sound , her brain reactivates the original memory and her body can physically respond in real time . So what not to do ? Don't send unsolicited explicit pics . You know the ones I'm talking about . They can kill anticipation . Don't double text If she doesn't reply right away . It shifts you from confident to needy , and here's why that's a problem . Neediness and over-persistence creates pressure . Pressure triggers the release of cortisol , your body's main stress hormone , and cortisol and sexual desire do not mix well . Elevated stress hormones literally block the brain's arousal pathways . Nothing kills craving faster than pressure . Stress shuts down arousal .
Speaker 1Step four
for the blueprint to making her crave you before sex is make the first moments count . The first five minutes you are with her set the tone for everything that happens next . When you greet her , hold her gaze , smile slowly and pause just for a beat before you kiss her . That half second pause before you kiss her that's pure sexual tension . That pause works because it builds dopamine . You're delaying gratification just enough to make her brain want the reward more . Step five to making her crave you before sex is touch with intention . Guide her through a door with a light touch on her lower back . Just thinking about that it makes me squirm . Let your fingers graze hers just a moment longer . When you hand her something , the lightest , most intentional touches will make her body want more of you . Those subtle touches activate her parasympathetic nervous system , the part responsible for relaxation and receptivity , that state where arousal flourishes . All right , now we're getting to the good stuff .
Speaker 1Step six to making her crave you for intimacy is show her you see , her Notice and acknowledge her choices her lipstick shade , her hairstyle , her perfume . When she feels seen beyond her body , your desire becomes irresistible . This kind of attention creates an emotional connection , and emotional connection primes the brain to release more oxytocin , making her more open to intimacy . Here's what not to do . Don't grab her sexually right away . It's jarring and it can create tension instead of desire . Don't talk about work , stress or bills . It pulls her brain into problem-solving mode , which suppresses arousal . Don't greet her while staring at your phone . It sends the message you're distracted and unavailable . Presence is one of the biggest turn-ons you have , so don't blow it by staring at your phone .
Speaker 1Step seven to making her crave you before intimacy is slow it down before you start . This is the moment that turns sex into I need you now . Sit close , let your knees touch and hold her gaze . If you want a little pro move , slide one of your knees in between hers and really connect . That is hot . It sends shivers down my spine just thinking about it . The slower you go now , the hotter it gets later . Slowing down increases contrast , so when you finally escalate , the shift feels electrifying .
Speaker 1Step eight to the blueprint for making her crave you before intimacy is use the whisper , lean in
and whisper in her ear . I've been thinking about this all day . I want to take my time with you . A whisper at her ear is primal . It bypasses her brain and goes straight to her body . Whispers are intimate because they activate the vagus nerve , which connects directly to pleasure and relaxation responses in the brain .
Speaker 1Step nine of the blueprint to making her crave you before intimacy is make her close the gap . Pull back just slightly and let her move in to kiss you . Pull back just slightly and let her move in to kiss you . When she's the one closing the distance , she's chasing you and craving you more . That subtle shift puts her into pursuit mode , which ramps up dopamine even more . What not to do here ? Don't rush to undress her . Don't ignore her cues and pace . Moving too fast creates performance pressure and again , that releases cortisol which shuts down the sexual desire . If you ignore her pace , you break the spell you've just created . So here we are at step 10 of the blueprint for making her crave you before intimacy .
Speaker 1Keep the energy alive between encounters . People who keep women craving them . Don't just turn it on for the night . They live it every day . Look at her with the curiosity you had when you first met . Make her laugh before you . Make her moan Be consistent so she knows this is always the experience she gets with you . When she knows you'll bring this energy every time , she'll start craving you on site and hours before Before sex .
Speaker 1Buildup is a secret to sex that she can't stop thinking about . Show up for the buildup and that's why she'll want you again and again and again when you get this right . She's not just waiting for sex , she's replaying every moment leading up to it in her mind over and over . So tonight don't just show up for the act , show up for the buildup . And when you're ready to take it even further , watch my episode what to Do After Sex to Make Her Crave you Even More . So go and give this a try and then report back and tell me how it goes for you .
Speaker 1If you have questions or comments about this episode , please feel free to drop a note in the comment section if you're on my YouTube channel at
TalkSexWithAnnette , if you're an audio listener , of course , you can go over to my YouTube channel and you can comment there , or you can email me at Annette at TalkSexWithAnnette . If you are an audio listener , of course you can go over to my YouTube channel and you can comment there , or you can email me at annette at talksexwithannettecom . Send me your questions , your comments , your thoughts and , of course , if you are looking for a cheerleader , a wing woman , someone to coach you through your intimate encounters or in your own journey to experience more pleasure yourself , my books are open . You can find out more about that at TalkSucksWithAnnettecom . Of course you can email me , dm me . I'd love to help you out . Okay , listeners , until next time I'll see you in the locker room . Cheers .