WEBVTT 00:00:30.600 --> 00:00:30.800 Well. 00:00:30.800 --> 00:00:33.365 Good morning, Valley View. 00:00:33.365 --> 00:00:36.299 How are you all doing this morning? 00:00:36.299 --> 00:00:40.466 Man, Colby did a phenomenal job last week on this growth series that we're doing, didn’t he? 00:00:40.466 --> 00:00:43.466 Let's give him a shout out on that. 00:00:45.633 --> 00:00:54.600 So if you're just getting here for the first time in the summer or want to know what's going on, we are spending this month and talking about what it means to grow. 00:00:55.133 --> 00:01:02.066 So Colby kicked us off last week and today I get to jump in here. 00:01:02.066 --> 00:01:03.432 Pastor John sends his love. 00:01:03.432 --> 00:01:06.233 He is with his youngest son, Schaeffer. 00:01:06.233 --> 00:01:09.433 They're having a really cool time together this weekend. Went away. 00:01:09.433 --> 00:01:12.033 Just spent some time with him. 00:01:12.033 --> 00:01:25.733 So, you know, one of the fascinating things that I find interesting with this time of year is looking on Facebook at everybody's pictures of their gardens and their yards and the fruit and the produce. 00:01:25.733 --> 00:01:29.965 If you look at Keith's yard over there, he's always got like fresh vegetables. 00:01:29.965 --> 00:01:36.566 And it's fascinating to me how people's yards are all different. 00:01:36.599 --> 00:01:43.733 I live in the West End and if you know anything about the West End, of course the 1937 flood went through there. 00:01:43.733 --> 00:01:48.233 It that area used to flood it before they had all the levees and locks and things like that. 00:01:48.233 --> 00:01:51.066 So our soil is very rich. 00:01:51.066 --> 00:01:57.066 My parents’ soil, on the other hand, they live in South central Kentucky, has a lot of clay. 00:01:57.066 --> 00:02:01.799 And you look at both of them and you go, well, you should be able to grow here what you grow there. 00:02:01.799 --> 00:02:04.132 But that's not the case. 00:02:04.132 --> 00:02:07.132 Different soils produce different fruit. 00:02:07.233 --> 00:02:19.133 So this morning what I want to talk about is what are the two biggest hindrances that I have seen with the body of Christ that hinder growth? 00:02:19.133 --> 00:02:25.599 Because if you know your soil, you know what's going on in your heart, you'll know what you can produce. 00:02:25.599 --> 00:02:27.400 Does that make sense? 00:02:27.400 --> 00:02:34.000 Okay, so the two biggest things that I've seen as a believer is disappointment and unforgiveness. 00:02:36.265 --> 00:02:46.566 Disappointment can lead to discouragement and lack of faith, while unforgiveness can create a barrier between you and God and others around you. 00:02:46.566 --> 00:02:54.765 The different soils in our spiritual life can be the very thing that hinders the fruit. 00:02:54.765 --> 00:02:59.233 See, my parents could try to grow the same stuff I grow in the West End. 00:02:59.233 --> 00:03:07.599 I got banana plants, I got, I don't know, I'm not a, plant expert, but they can't grow those where they live. 00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:11.032 The soil they deal with is that it's clay. 00:03:11.032 --> 00:03:18.366 And if they, it just creates more challenges on trying to produce the same kind of stuff. 00:03:18.366 --> 00:03:23.466 So this morning we're going to jump into the story of Joseph. 00:03:23.532 --> 00:03:34.000 And we're going to highlight the very things that he walked through and how that applies to our life, walking through disappointment and unforgiveness. 00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:39.199 And if I asked you right now around the room, how many of you have forgiven someone? 00:03:39.199 --> 00:03:40.765 Most of y'all could raise your hands. 00:03:40.765 --> 00:03:46.733 But if I'm going to ask you at the end of this message, are there still some people you need to forgive? 00:03:46.733 --> 00:03:49.400 We'll give an opportunity for that also. 00:03:49.400 --> 00:03:55.665 So we're going to kind of summarize Genesis 37 kicks off Joseph was 17 years old. 00:03:56.699 --> 00:04:01.432 If you open your Bibles today, I'm going to kind of summarize, and then we're going to jump over to chapter 40. 00:04:01.432 --> 00:04:03.000 Joseph, 17 years old. 00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:04.733 He's the favorite son. 00:04:04.733 --> 00:04:08.165 Can I just tell y'all parents one little thing I'm learning? Don't have a favorite. 00:04:08.165 --> 00:04:12.300 It just creates a headache because, you know, the youngest is always the favorite. 00:04:12.300 --> 00:04:14.332 I was the oldest, so we got the most consequences. 00:04:14.332 --> 00:04:17.165 So I understand how this really works. 00:04:17.165 --> 00:04:20.432 Joseph, the youngest, 17 years old. 00:04:21.065 --> 00:04:26.565 His father loves him, gives him a coat, coat of many colors. 00:04:26.632 --> 00:04:34.833 He's that brother that goes around, does no work, nothing, and just kind of, hey, mom, dad, brothers aren't doing this right. 00:04:34.833 --> 00:04:36.466 Mom, dad, they need to do this different. 00:04:36.466 --> 00:04:44.399 Mom, dad, I mean, parents, we deal with that already with the way my my, you know, youngest tattles on the middle that then tells on the old, you know. 00:04:45.500 --> 00:04:47.733 So that's Joseph. 00:04:47.733 --> 00:04:50.466 So his brothers are like okay, we've had enough of it. 00:04:50.466 --> 00:04:52.065 Oh and let's throw in there too. 00:04:52.065 --> 00:04:59.033 Joseph has a supernatural gift of dreams, and he likes to share those with the siblings. 00:04:59.033 --> 00:05:00.833 That doesn't go over really well. 00:05:00.833 --> 00:05:03.766 Hey, I had a dream that you all were bowing to me. 00:05:03.766 --> 00:05:05.233 Doesn't go over really well. 00:05:05.233 --> 00:05:08.632 So his brothers are like, let's kill him. Let's get rid of him. 00:05:08.632 --> 00:05:14.199 Then an opportunity comes up where they can sell him to some traders that are going through the area. 00:05:14.199 --> 00:05:15.800 So they do that, they sell him. 00:05:15.800 --> 00:05:17.932 He ends up in Egypt. 00:05:17.932 --> 00:05:35.033 He ends up being sold to one of Pharaoh's head people, Potiphar, and he then gets in this place where he thrives in Potiphar's house, but then has to... 00:05:35.199 --> 00:05:40.333 Fight off the advances of his wife. 00:05:40.333 --> 00:05:41.199 And then what happens? 00:05:41.199 --> 00:05:43.733 He ends up in jail. 00:05:43.733 --> 00:05:51.266 How many of you ever felt like everything I try to do right for God, I end up on this end? 00:05:51.266 --> 00:05:53.833 I end up like on the short end of things. 00:05:53.833 --> 00:06:00.500 Every time that I try to make a stand or do what's holy or do this, something bad happens. 00:06:00.500 --> 00:06:07.266 So where I want to pick up is this is Genesis 40, verse 12. 00:06:07.266 --> 00:06:10.266 Here's Joseph, he's in prison. 00:06:11.033 --> 00:06:18.800 And while he's in prison, the Lord promotes him and open doors happen and blessings happen. 00:06:18.800 --> 00:06:22.632 And he gets he gets to be over certain prisoners. 00:06:23.033 --> 00:06:28.565 And one day, two prisoners come to him and say, hey, look, we had some dreams. 00:06:28.565 --> 00:06:29.466 We don't know what's up. 00:06:30.833 --> 00:06:36.500 The cupbearer was thrown in prison and he shares this dream. 00:06:37.899 --> 00:06:39.899 And Joseph interpreted. 00:06:39.899 --> 00:06:42.899 Then the baker shares his dream. 00:06:43.632 --> 00:06:47.399 Joseph interprets that the dreams were. 00:06:47.399 --> 00:06:54.399 Joseph interprets, predicting that the cupbearer would be restored in his position, while the baker would be executed. 00:06:54.399 --> 00:06:55.300 And exactly. 00:06:55.300 --> 00:06:56.766 That's what happened and [Genesis] 40. 00:06:56.766 --> 00:07:00.132 Verse 12 says this this is what dreams mean. Joseph said. 00:07:00.132 --> 00:07:09.466 The three branches, which represents three days, within three days, the Pharaoh will lift you up and restore you to your position as chief cupbearer. 00:07:09.466 --> 00:07:12.233 And please remember me and do me a favor. 00:07:12.233 --> 00:07:18.300 When things go well for you, mention me to Pharaoh so that he might let me out of this place. 00:07:18.300 --> 00:07:24.033 For I was kidnaped from my homeland of the Hebrews, and now I'm here in prison. 00:07:24.033 --> 00:07:26.600 But I did nothing to deserve it. 00:07:28.365 --> 00:07:31.365 I want to hang out here for a minute. 00:07:31.399 --> 00:07:35.199 I personally believe in all of Joseph's story. 00:07:35.199 --> 00:07:41.466 This had to be the hardest season of his life. 00:07:42.100 --> 00:07:48.233 Because it was two years later before the cupbearer ever said anything. 00:07:48.800 --> 00:07:51.800 Two years later. 00:07:53.233 --> 00:07:55.100 Think about that. 00:07:55.100 --> 00:07:57.500 Joseph here, you know, he's like, man, life's been rough. 00:07:57.500 --> 00:07:58.100 Things have been hard. 00:07:58.100 --> 00:07:58.966 I've been sold into slavery. 00:07:58.966 --> 00:08:02.333 I tried, you know, Potiphar’s wife, tried to try to seduce me. 00:08:02.333 --> 00:08:04.233 I said no and end up in prison. 00:08:04.233 --> 00:08:08.833 And two years and then these dreams comes his. 00:08:08.833 --> 00:08:11.300 Sometimes later in Scripture doesn't give us the timeline. 00:08:11.300 --> 00:08:15.132 Sometimes later, he interprets these dreams. 00:08:15.132 --> 00:08:17.665 He kind of starts thinking, Okay, well, maybe things are going to work out. 00:08:17.665 --> 00:08:19.132 Maybe I'm going to get out of this situation. 00:08:19.132 --> 00:08:21.000 Maybe it's going to get easy. 00:08:21.000 --> 00:08:22.500 Maybe I will get out of prison. 00:08:22.500 --> 00:08:23.600 I can return to my home. 00:08:24.665 --> 00:08:29.100 But then it was two over two years later. 00:08:30.966 --> 00:08:33.966 Hope deferred makes the heart sick. 00:08:34.299 --> 00:08:37.299 12. 00:08:39.133 --> 00:08:49.432 I have seen so many believers go through a disappointment, and it be the very thing that hijacks their life or derails them. 00:08:52.732 --> 00:08:56.365 I grew up playing sports all my life. 00:08:56.633 --> 00:08:59.166 Playing basketball, baseball, soccer. 00:08:59.166 --> 00:09:01.633 But basketball was was my go to sport. 00:09:01.633 --> 00:09:03.033 I've broken my ankles. 00:09:03.033 --> 00:09:07.399 I've broken toes, I’ve dislocated fingers, all kinds of injuries. 00:09:07.399 --> 00:09:09.533 And all of them, for the most part, have healed back. 00:09:09.533 --> 00:09:10.899 Right? Except one. 00:09:10.899 --> 00:09:17.899 I was playing in a basketball tournament in college, and I tore my shoulder and I dislocated and tore it. 00:09:17.899 --> 00:09:26.033 I quickly set it in, but I never went through the proper process for it to heal back right. 00:09:26.633 --> 00:09:31.265 In so many times our hearts can be the same way. 00:09:31.265 --> 00:09:32.633 See, I can, I can right now. 00:09:32.633 --> 00:09:33.166 I'm not going to. 00:09:33.166 --> 00:09:38.332 I can pull it in and out of socket because it didn't heal back right. 00:09:38.332 --> 00:09:43.365 And so many times our hearts can be the same thing. 00:09:43.365 --> 00:09:49.000 We go through a disappointment and things just, you know, it didn't work out the way I thought it was. 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:51.533 This didn't happen the way I was praying it was going to do. 00:09:51.533 --> 00:09:55.399 I had planned for this and this didn't work out and this didn't happen. 00:09:55.399 --> 00:10:07.500 And then what happens is instead of healing back normal, instead of believing for God to do the things that he's promised, promised in His Word, promise for our family, what he's spoken over our lives, just maybe he will. 00:10:07.500 --> 00:10:08.299 Maybe he won't. 00:10:08.299 --> 00:10:19.633 And what sometimes even happens is we even twist our theology and our perspective of him so that we don't feel that disappointment again. 00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:23.932 Even yesterday, I dealt with something. 00:10:23.932 --> 00:10:30.133 Adrienne and I dealt with the situation, and I was like, really, God, the day before, I'm going to speak on this. 00:10:30.133 --> 00:10:33.100 I was so mad. 00:10:33.100 --> 00:10:34.799 I really was like, no, no, no, no, no. 00:10:34.799 --> 00:10:40.332 And it was somebody that we were working with on a situation and they did a 180 on us. 00:10:40.365 --> 00:10:45.133 Oh, and I was like, no, not before I speak on this. 00:10:45.432 --> 00:10:47.033 I had to deal with my own heart. 00:10:47.033 --> 00:10:53.832 It took me yesterday afternoon and all morning to deal with my heart because. 00:10:54.133 --> 00:11:00.566 I don't want to heal back unhealthy in my heart with that hurt. 00:11:02.533 --> 00:11:07.932 And what happens a lot of times is this disappointment leads to despair. 00:11:08.799 --> 00:11:16.865 Despair leads to withholding, withholding trust, withholding love, withholding worship. 00:11:18.832 --> 00:11:23.633 That's why sometimes on Sunday mornings, we do songs like defender, refiner. 00:11:25.932 --> 00:11:26.332 There. 00:11:26.332 --> 00:11:41.200 So that the Spirit of God, the Holy Spirit, can come in and gently massage your heart in the places of disappointment so that you can lift up praise and adoration from a healed perspective. 00:11:44.700 --> 00:11:48.332 For me, yesterday I was getting over a little bit of sickness. 00:11:48.332 --> 00:11:52.432 I had to get on the bike and just go for a ride just to work some stuff out with the Lord. 00:11:52.432 --> 00:12:06.600 And then this morning I had to hide in my office and just worship through it because I was like, God, I don't want to withhold anything from you, and I don't want to withhold anything from others, and I want to be able to trust you, and I want to be able to obey you. 00:12:09.232 --> 00:12:16.832 But if I don't let you heal this area of my heart right, I'm going to add disappointment. 00:12:16.832 --> 00:12:22.799 And I'm going to take my expectation of you moving in my life. 00:12:24.365 --> 00:12:29.666 I really believe there's different ones of you in here that have been through really hard situations. 00:12:30.966 --> 00:12:32.832 And you've stuffed the emotion. 00:12:32.832 --> 00:12:34.899 You've stuffed the pain. 00:12:34.899 --> 00:12:35.633 And guess what? 00:12:35.633 --> 00:12:44.033 The soil of your heart isn't allowing the fruit to come forth that you were called to bring. 00:12:44.566 --> 00:12:51.332 Because it needs some tender love and care from the Holy Spirit to come in there. 00:12:54.533 --> 00:12:55.432 And I get it. 00:12:55.432 --> 00:12:58.432 It's hard. It hurts. 00:12:58.732 --> 00:13:05.066 But there's a loving father that wants to show you that you can trust him. 00:13:05.932 --> 00:13:12.865 I believe the two years while Joseph waited were also his refining years. 00:13:13.865 --> 00:13:21.566 I believe that was the time that God was like, look, man, I have something for you, but we've got to deal with some stuff. 00:13:21.566 --> 00:13:22.432 It doesn't say that. 00:13:22.432 --> 00:13:24.033 That's Andrew's interpretation. 00:13:24.033 --> 00:13:26.466 Let me make clear that's my interpretation there. 00:13:26.466 --> 00:13:31.232 Those were the times where he's like, look, I've got plans for you. 00:13:31.232 --> 00:13:36.399 Those dreams you had, those hard to come forth, but you need to be refined so that you can handle that. 00:13:36.399 --> 00:13:39.399 You need to have a healing of your heart. 00:13:39.666 --> 00:13:41.033 And we'll see that in just a minute. 00:13:41.033 --> 00:13:43.166 How that how that actually did take place. 00:13:43.166 --> 00:13:48.365 But I believe those were the critical times. 00:13:49.066 --> 00:13:56.765 And can I just tell you this morning too God wants you to heal from disappointment. 00:13:59.700 --> 00:14:01.732 God wants you to heal from disappointment. 00:14:03.265 --> 00:14:06.232 One of my best friends called me last week. 00:14:06.232 --> 00:14:12.466 His sister died from cancer and we'd been praying and standing together. 00:14:12.466 --> 00:14:16.666 He sent me in the text afterwards he goes, I need to call you later to process it. 00:14:16.666 --> 00:14:23.232 I said, absolutely, because he has seen people healed from cancer. 00:14:23.232 --> 00:14:25.832 He has prayed and watched miracles take place. 00:14:25.832 --> 00:14:27.332 Why did his sister die? 00:14:27.332 --> 00:14:40.000 I don't know, it's okay to say I don't know, but I know my friend and we're going to process that truth together over the phone, and we're going to remember the truth of who God is, that he is a healer. 00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:46.700 That even when we don't understand what's going on, we can stand on the truth, even when it doesn't make sense. 00:14:46.700 --> 00:14:47.899 We can stand on the truth. 00:14:47.899 --> 00:14:51.166 Even when it doesn't feel good. 00:14:51.166 --> 00:14:56.000 We can stand on the truth because we want our hearts to be healthy and whole. 00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:59.265 We want the soil of our heart to bring forth fruit. 00:14:59.265 --> 00:15:01.332 We want to see the miracles happen. 00:15:01.332 --> 00:15:07.865 We want to walk up to the next situation and say, this might not have happend last time, but I'm standing and believing this time. 00:15:07.865 --> 00:15:10.600 Amen. 00:15:10.600 --> 00:15:16.399 All right, let's jump over to Genesis 45. 00:15:18.265 --> 00:15:26.399 I love how this section right here really displays the transformation that happened to Joseph's heart. 00:15:26.399 --> 00:15:29.399 Joseph could stand it no longer. 00:15:29.633 --> 00:15:34.200 There were many people in the room, and he said to his attendants, out all of you. 00:15:34.200 --> 00:15:39.066 So he was alone with his brothers when he told them who he was. 00:15:39.066 --> 00:15:41.533 Then they broke down and wept. 00:15:41.533 --> 00:15:47.500 He wept so loudly that the Egyptians could hear him, and the word of it quickly carried to pharaoh's palace. 00:15:47.500 --> 00:15:52.299 I love that he's like, look everybody out, everybody out, out, out! Leave me alone with them. 00:15:52.299 --> 00:15:53.765 Leave me alone with them. 00:15:53.765 --> 00:15:55.799 Could you imagine his interpreter? 00:15:55.799 --> 00:15:56.200 He's. 00:15:56.200 --> 00:15:58.332 Let's just visualize this. Here's Joseph. 00:15:58.332 --> 00:15:59.432 He's in Egyptian garb. 00:15:59.432 --> 00:16:00.533 He's got an interpreter. 00:16:00.533 --> 00:16:02.566 I don't know if they were speaking Hebrew or whatever. 00:16:02.566 --> 00:16:05.299 And he's saying whatever to him, and he's speaking to him. 00:16:05.299 --> 00:16:08.033 And then he's just like, out, I want everybody out of the room. 00:16:08.033 --> 00:16:09.966 Leave me alone with them. 00:16:09.966 --> 00:16:15.033 I am Joseph, he said to his brothers, is my father still alive? 00:16:15.033 --> 00:16:17.200 But his brothers were speechless. 00:16:17.200 --> 00:16:21.700 They were stunned to realize that Joseph was standing there in front of them. 00:16:21.700 --> 00:16:24.066 Please come closer, he said to them. 00:16:24.066 --> 00:16:30.533 So they came closer and he said again, I am Joseph, your brother, whom you sold into slavery in Egypt. 00:16:30.533 --> 00:16:36.000 But don't be upset, and don't be angry with yourselves for selling me into this place. 00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:40.899 It was God that sent me here ahead of you to preserve your lives. 00:16:40.899 --> 00:16:49.432 This famine that has ravaged the land for two years will last five more years, and there will be neither plowing, no, nor harvesting. 00:16:49.432 --> 00:16:55.133 God has sent me ahead of you to keep you and your families alive and to preserve many survivors. 00:16:55.133 --> 00:16:58.133 So it is God who sent me here, not you. 00:16:59.033 --> 00:17:06.865 And he is the one who made me an advisor to Pharaoh, the manager of his entire palace and the governor in all of Egypt. 00:17:08.432 --> 00:17:13.665 Now hurry back to my father and tell him, this is what your son Joseph said. 00:17:13.665 --> 00:17:17.365 God has made me master over all the land of Egypt. 00:17:17.365 --> 00:17:28.700 So come down to me immediately, so you can live in the region of Goshen, where you can be near me with all your children and grandchildren, your flocks, herds and everything. 00:17:28.700 --> 00:17:33.465 I will take care of you there, for there's still five years of famine ahead of us. 00:17:33.465 --> 00:17:37.299 Otherwise you and your household animals will starve. 00:17:38.032 --> 00:17:45.200 Then Joseph added, look and see for yourselves, and see my brother Benjamin, that I am really Joseph. 00:17:45.200 --> 00:17:49.066 Go tell my father about my honored position here in Egypt. 00:17:49.066 --> 00:17:54.365 Describe for him everything you have seen, and then bring my father here quickly. 00:17:58.432 --> 00:18:02.633 Joseph models for us six points of forgiveness. 00:18:02.633 --> 00:18:06.032 And I want to highlight these this morning. 00:18:06.566 --> 00:18:10.333 How do you know you've really forgiven someone? 00:18:10.732 --> 00:18:17.232 Again, I could ask and people would say, hey, you know, I've got a story or I've got this situation, I've got that. 00:18:17.232 --> 00:18:23.032 This morning I want to list six points from that passage of Scripture. 00:18:23.032 --> 00:18:30.232 Point number one, you don't talk about what they did to you. 00:18:30.732 --> 00:18:33.732 That is the first. 00:18:34.432 --> 00:18:36.865 That you've know you’ve forgiven them. 00:18:36.865 --> 00:18:38.066 I mean, think about this situation. 00:18:38.066 --> 00:18:41.066 Here's Joseph. 00:18:41.333 --> 00:18:42.766 He could have said whatever. 00:18:42.766 --> 00:18:45.766 He's the prime minister of Egypt. 00:18:45.766 --> 00:18:48.032 He could have said whatever. 00:18:48.032 --> 00:18:50.732 No, he had everybody leave the room. 00:18:50.732 --> 00:18:51.500 Leave me alone. 00:18:51.500 --> 00:18:56.099 Because thinking about this, he goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah. 00:18:57.133 --> 00:18:57.532 Come on. 00:18:57.532 --> 00:18:59.333 Who's, who's the oldest sibling right here? 00:18:59.333 --> 00:19:00.932 Any oldest? Yes. 00:19:00.932 --> 00:19:02.232 Come on. 00:19:02.232 --> 00:19:05.165 We know we know when we can leverage a situation. 00:19:05.165 --> 00:19:06.500 We were the instigators. 00:19:08.532 --> 00:19:12.000 Joseph was like oh the tables have turned. 00:19:12.000 --> 00:19:14.633 The tables have turned. 00:19:14.633 --> 00:19:16.000 Nope. 00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:19.000 He had everybody leave. 00:19:19.500 --> 00:19:21.299 It's been 22 years. 00:19:21.299 --> 00:19:22.532 He's like, let me show you. 00:19:22.532 --> 00:19:23.900 Let me give you a little taste of the pain. 00:19:23.900 --> 00:19:29.299 No, he wanted nobody in the room, not even the interpreters. 00:19:29.299 --> 00:19:32.066 You don't talk about what they did to you. 00:19:32.066 --> 00:19:35.566 That is the first unforgiveness. 00:19:35.566 --> 00:19:37.299 There are two exceptions. 00:19:37.299 --> 00:19:40.299 The first legal. 00:19:41.032 --> 00:19:49.432 If someone did a form of legal abuse or some other form of of anything illegal, you need to talk about it. Okay. 00:19:49.432 --> 00:19:50.599 Let me make that very clear. 00:19:50.599 --> 00:19:52.799 If there's abuse, you need to talk about it. 00:19:52.799 --> 00:19:53.599 You need to deal with it. 00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:55.266 You need to report to authorities. 00:19:55.266 --> 00:20:01.066 And the second is if you have somebody to keep you accountable to point you towards truth. 00:20:03.232 --> 00:20:14.299 I know I've been through some situations, and I've had to share with a couple close people in my life to be reminders of truth, not plate, not people that you just vent and throw your stuff at. 00:20:14.299 --> 00:20:18.099 No, you need people that are going to be like, hey, let me point you to truth. 00:20:18.099 --> 00:20:20.532 Hey, this is how he's handled the situation. 00:20:20.532 --> 00:20:21.532 God's word. 00:20:21.532 --> 00:20:23.400 This is how you handle this. This way. 00:20:23.400 --> 00:20:25.965 This is how you handle that, that way. 00:20:25.965 --> 00:20:32.232 So the first sign that you know you have fully forgiven is you don't talk about it. 00:20:32.232 --> 00:20:33.833 You do, however, talk about it to the Lord. 00:20:33.833 --> 00:20:38.932 Psalm 142 you pour out the pain of your heart to the Lord. 00:20:38.932 --> 00:20:41.599 He needs to be the first person you go to. 00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:50.566 I'll be honest, I'm a verbal processor and a lot of times I want to just process what I'm thinking and what I'm struggling with. 00:20:50.566 --> 00:20:52.165 Before I go to the Lord. 00:20:52.165 --> 00:20:57.400 My wife reminds me that that's not the way you do it, and I'm grateful she does. 00:20:57.400 --> 00:20:59.032 But I am a verbal processor. 00:20:59.032 --> 00:21:02.432 But I have to get that out to the Lord first. 00:21:02.432 --> 00:21:04.465 I have to express the pain. 00:21:04.465 --> 00:21:09.599 David does it all through the Psalms and that is what he wants to do for us. 00:21:11.200 --> 00:21:12.932 Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord. 00:21:12.932 --> 00:21:15.833 It's not my job. 00:21:15.833 --> 00:21:17.165 You don't talk about it. 00:21:17.165 --> 00:21:18.566 Point 2. 00:21:18.566 --> 00:21:20.865 Don't let them be afraid of you. 00:21:20.865 --> 00:21:21.865 What did Joseph do? 00:21:21.865 --> 00:21:23.633 Hey! Come close, come close. 00:21:23.633 --> 00:21:24.365 Hey, hey. 00:21:24.365 --> 00:21:25.566 I'm. You know, come close. 00:21:25.566 --> 00:21:27.766 They're like. Whoa, wait. What? 00:21:27.766 --> 00:21:29.099 We thought we got rid of you. 00:21:29.099 --> 00:21:30.232 No, come close. 00:21:34.032 --> 00:21:36.833 You don't let them be afraid of you. 00:21:36.833 --> 00:21:39.365 When you have really forgiven you. 00:21:39.365 --> 00:21:41.700 Don't let them be afraid of you. 00:21:41.700 --> 00:21:44.232 Spouses, husbands, wives. 00:21:44.232 --> 00:21:48.266 We can work on that when our spouse does something. 00:21:48.266 --> 00:21:50.232 Ooh, how we harboring that? 00:21:50.232 --> 00:21:51.432 How do we want to handle that? 00:21:51.432 --> 00:21:54.432 are there walls? 00:21:55.865 --> 00:21:58.232 Parents to children. 00:21:58.232 --> 00:22:00.432 Don't let them be afraid of you. 00:22:00.432 --> 00:22:03.365 Hey, I'm speaking of myself on this, too, okay? So just. 00:22:03.365 --> 00:22:04.133 I'm not. 00:22:04.133 --> 00:22:05.665 I'm taking this in. 00:22:05.665 --> 00:22:08.365 I just spent a lot of time in prayer over this today. 00:22:08.365 --> 00:22:11.365 You don't want them afraid of you. 00:22:13.232 --> 00:22:15.232 Point number three. 00:22:15.232 --> 00:22:18.232 You don't tell them what they did. 00:22:18.465 --> 00:22:20.599 Boundaries are done in love. 00:22:20.599 --> 00:22:22.232 Walls are done in fear. 00:22:22.232 --> 00:22:27.799 If you tell them what they did, it's in a safe [place] and the right time. 00:22:27.799 --> 00:22:28.099 Okay? 00:22:30.232 --> 00:22:32.532 My wife, Adrienne and I, we talk about that a lot of. 00:22:32.532 --> 00:22:35.232 Are you up to date on your forgiveness? 00:22:35.232 --> 00:22:38.266 There's things I do that offend her and bother her. 00:22:38.266 --> 00:22:39.766 Probably all the time. 00:22:39.766 --> 00:22:42.766 My personality can be all over the place. 00:22:44.165 --> 00:22:45.532 She has to constantly forgive. 00:22:45.532 --> 00:22:46.432 I have to forgive. 00:22:46.432 --> 00:22:47.133 I'm human. 00:22:47.133 --> 00:22:48.133 I'm a parent. 00:22:48.133 --> 00:22:51.566 A lot of times it's like we never bring up what we forgave about. 00:22:51.566 --> 00:22:52.932 We just forgive. 00:22:52.932 --> 00:22:53.732 We forgive. 00:22:53.732 --> 00:22:55.700 We trust the Lord with it. We forgive. 00:22:55.700 --> 00:22:57.532 We let it go. 00:22:57.532 --> 00:23:00.566 Joseph modeled that. He didn't go, Hey, you don't know where? 00:23:00.566 --> 00:23:02.133 No, he said, what did he say? 00:23:02.133 --> 00:23:04.665 Guess what? God sent me ahead of you. 00:23:04.665 --> 00:23:06.066 He didn't even bring up prison. 00:23:06.066 --> 00:23:09.066 He didn't bring up the accusations dealing with Potiphar's wife. 00:23:09.066 --> 00:23:10.165 He didn't bring up all the pain. 00:23:10.165 --> 00:23:12.200 He didn't bring up all the trials, you know, bring up man. 00:23:12.200 --> 00:23:12.766 You don't understand. 00:23:12.766 --> 00:23:14.000 I was in prison for this long. 00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:17.000 No, he said God sent me ahead of you. 00:23:17.032 --> 00:23:18.066 Isn't this awesome? 00:23:22.965 --> 00:23:24.932 Point number four. 00:23:24.932 --> 00:23:27.932 You let them save face. 00:23:28.465 --> 00:23:38.165 Dale Carnegie's book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, says that if you let another person save face, you've got a friend for life. 00:23:38.333 --> 00:23:41.032 You let them save face. 00:23:41.032 --> 00:23:44.032 I had a situation a couple of years ago. 00:23:46.032 --> 00:23:49.032 And, I was dealing with a leader. 00:23:50.032 --> 00:23:51.532 Nobody connected to Valley View. 00:23:51.532 --> 00:23:52.732 You would never know this person. 00:23:52.732 --> 00:24:04.965 So let me bring clarity there. I was, dealing with a leader that handled a situation poorly, and it was a leader that I had to interact with on a very regular basis. 00:24:06.965 --> 00:24:14.133 And the way they handled this situation, they handled it out of fear and just reacted. 00:24:14.133 --> 00:24:18.200 And it was a it was a very messy situation. 00:24:19.200 --> 00:24:27.865 And I remember in the process that the Lord was like, keep your love on, keep your love on towards them, keep your love on towards him. 00:24:27.865 --> 00:24:36.700 Love them, love them even when they're acting out, even when they love them, love them. 00:24:37.665 --> 00:24:43.400 One day, eventually, later on, there was full reconciliation. 00:24:43.400 --> 00:24:48.000 And let me say this forgiveness and reconciliation are two different things. 00:24:48.000 --> 00:24:50.599 Okay? 00:24:50.599 --> 00:24:51.400 You have to forgive. 00:24:51.400 --> 00:24:52.665 It says you have to forgive and bless. 00:24:52.665 --> 00:24:55.066 But reconciliation looks different. 00:24:55.066 --> 00:25:00.865 If your best friend had an affair with your spouse, she probably should not go on vacation with him. 00:25:00.865 --> 00:25:03.865 But you do have to forgive. 00:25:04.766 --> 00:25:05.566 You have to bless. 00:25:05.566 --> 00:25:06.965 You have to let go. 00:25:06.965 --> 00:25:14.566 But in this situation that I was in, I had to forgive and I had to forgive constantly. 00:25:15.266 --> 00:25:18.099 But it required humility on the front end and humility on the back end. 00:25:18.099 --> 00:25:21.365 Because when the reconciliation process took place, eventually. 00:25:24.066 --> 00:25:35.532 I, I had to trust the Lord with the process and let the Lord handled it, handle it, because my nature would've been like, oh, see, I was right. 00:25:35.532 --> 00:25:37.299 You were wrong. 00:25:37.299 --> 00:25:39.799 But I had a choice. 00:25:39.799 --> 00:25:44.732 Did I want judgment or did I want revival in the relationship? 00:25:47.232 --> 00:25:55.133 And choosing revival in the relationship has brought long lasting fruit after that situation. 00:25:56.133 --> 00:26:01.766 The real issue becomes, how much do you want the presence of God? 00:26:01.766 --> 00:26:05.266 Don't be surprised at the people that you really have to forgive down deeper. 00:26:05.266 --> 00:26:13.932 A leader, a pastor, a teacher, a coach, a parent, me, someone. 00:26:16.965 --> 00:26:19.799 But how much do you want the presence of God? 00:26:19.799 --> 00:26:24.532 How much are you longing for his presence? 00:26:29.032 --> 00:26:30.865 You don't bring up the issue. 00:26:30.865 --> 00:26:35.633 You let them save face and you give them the opportunity to forgive themselves. 00:26:41.900 --> 00:26:47.932 You protect them against their offense, their darkest secret. 00:26:48.232 --> 00:26:51.232 You know God does that with us. 00:26:52.465 --> 00:26:55.066 His mercies are new every morning. 00:26:55.066 --> 00:26:57.232 Great is His faithfulness. 00:26:57.232 --> 00:27:00.532 He cast the sins as far as from the east to the west. 00:27:00.532 --> 00:27:06.599 He removes everything that we bring to him in repentance. 00:27:06.599 --> 00:27:09.599 So why do we want to do it with others? 00:27:10.599 --> 00:27:13.599 Why do we try to hold on to it? 00:27:14.532 --> 00:27:18.799 Why do we want to bring it up where it's shaming? 00:27:21.865 --> 00:27:22.965 And total forgiveness. 00:27:22.965 --> 00:27:25.965 Point number six is a life sentence. 00:27:28.432 --> 00:27:32.333 It's like a pill you have to take daily to live. 00:27:34.500 --> 00:27:38.766 How many times does it say in the New Testament you forgive? 00:27:38.865 --> 00:27:41.865 Say it. 00:27:42.133 --> 00:27:47.700 Yes, I remember I had a situation when I was a youth pastor. 00:27:47.700 --> 00:27:55.299 I had a kid in my youth group that was battling, a sexual addiction. 00:27:55.299 --> 00:28:00.133 He was seeing a therapist three times a week, was not getting any breakthrough. 00:28:00.133 --> 00:28:06.266 And I remember we got to talking and, I said, hey, tell tell me your story. 00:28:06.266 --> 00:28:09.032 His mom finally brought him to my office. 00:28:09.032 --> 00:28:10.732 We started talking like, what's going on? 00:28:10.732 --> 00:28:18.633 What's your story in conversation, found out that he was abused by his father. 00:28:18.633 --> 00:28:19.133 That's what. 00:28:19.133 --> 00:28:21.865 Have you ever...ever forgiven him? 00:28:21.865 --> 00:28:25.165 Well, No, no, no. 00:28:25.365 --> 00:28:26.732 Okay. 00:28:26.732 --> 00:28:31.932 I said, can we invite Holy Spirit in and let me walk through that with you? 00:28:32.165 --> 00:28:35.700 I said, yeah, so we had a moment. 00:28:35.700 --> 00:28:41.032 We prayed together instantly free from sexual addiction. 00:28:42.400 --> 00:28:45.400 Six months later. 00:28:45.700 --> 00:28:49.865 I get a call, I'm struggling again, said, hey, what's up? 00:28:49.865 --> 00:28:51.965 You know, where we at? 00:28:51.965 --> 00:29:00.500 He said, well, I had a I had a visit from my father I hadn't seen in six months and everything kind of okay. 00:29:00.500 --> 00:29:03.099 He picked up that unforgiveness. 00:29:03.099 --> 00:29:06.099 Forgiveness is a life sentence. 00:29:06.432 --> 00:29:09.432 Forgiveness is an everyday thing. 00:29:11.633 --> 00:29:20.400 14 - 15, if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly father will also forgive you. 00:29:20.400 --> 00:29:27.566 But if you do not forgive others trespasses, neither will your father forgive your trespasses. 00:29:30.932 --> 00:29:44.200 The two biggest things that I've seen as a believer is disappointment and unforgiveness are the things that steal the growth of a believer's life. 00:29:44.200 --> 00:29:50.099 Disappointment can derail the believer, and they lose the trajectory in the path that God has called them to. 00:29:50.099 --> 00:30:02.365 They lose the opportunity to step into the influence that God wants to put them in, because their heart stays in the place of disappointment and despair, and then they withhold, thinking they'll never get out of that pit. 00:30:02.365 --> 00:30:07.333 And unforgiveness is the very thing that robs the soil of our heart. 00:30:09.266 --> 00:30:14.865 So here's what I want to do this morning after listing those six things. 00:30:15.400 --> 00:30:18.400 You don't talk about what they did. 00:30:18.599 --> 00:30:21.365 You don't let them be afraid of you. 00:30:21.365 --> 00:30:23.032 You don't tell them what they did. 00:30:23.032 --> 00:30:26.932 You let them save face and you protect against their secrets. 00:30:26.932 --> 00:30:29.299 Total forgiveness, again, is a life sentence. 00:30:29.299 --> 00:30:39.599 When you hear those six things, how many people would say, you know, someone comes to mind that I need to forgive? 00:30:39.599 --> 00:30:44.566 Someone comes to mind that I haven't really fully released. 00:30:44.566 --> 00:30:49.200 Or on the other side, you may say, dude, you don't know the pain I've been through. 00:30:49.200 --> 00:30:51.133 You don't know the disappointment I've walked through. 00:30:51.133 --> 00:30:53.766 You don't know the hardships I've been through. 00:30:53.766 --> 00:30:57.232 And my heart is still in that place and is never fully recovered. 00:30:57.232 --> 00:31:00.900 And let me just say, I know this is a very, very, very sensitive topic. 00:31:02.333 --> 00:31:06.200 It could be the loss of a loved one. 00:31:07.032 --> 00:31:09.833 It could be a divorce. 00:31:09.833 --> 00:31:12.000 It could be the list goes on. 00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:15.965 It could be a pastor that failed, a leader that failed. 00:31:18.066 --> 00:31:23.299 But if you're here this morning and you want to say, hey, Lord. 00:31:24.266 --> 00:31:24.833 I'm. 00:31:24.833 --> 00:31:27.833 I want my soil of my heart to be good. 00:31:28.165 --> 00:31:30.865 I want the labor and the stuff that I put into it. 00:31:30.865 --> 00:31:33.532 The time I'm in the word to produce this fruit. 00:31:33.532 --> 00:31:36.599 But I've still got some stuff in there that's hindering it. 00:31:36.599 --> 00:31:37.865 And you want to break that? 00:31:37.865 --> 00:31:40.432 Break free from that. 00:31:40.432 --> 00:31:41.665 I want to pray for you. 00:31:41.665 --> 00:31:45.532 So let's go ahead and close our eyes around the room. 00:31:47.000 --> 00:31:51.532 If you're here this morning, I'm going to I'm going to ask two questions. 00:31:52.365 --> 00:32:03.865 If you're here this morning and your heart still needs healing from a place of disappointment, raise your hand. 00:32:03.865 --> 00:32:04.833 Okay. 00:32:04.833 --> 00:32:07.833 All right. 00:32:08.200 --> 00:32:11.200 So a lot of hands. 00:32:12.965 --> 00:32:18.633 If you're here this morning and you would say, Andrew. 00:32:19.299 --> 00:32:23.633 People are popping into my head that I need to forgive. 00:32:23.633 --> 00:32:25.165 Lift your hand. 00:32:25.165 --> 00:32:31.900 Okay, here's how I want to handle this next, next moment. 00:32:38.032 --> 00:32:41.865 I'm going to pray for you in both areas. 00:32:41.865 --> 00:32:43.932 But if you raised your hand, nobody looking around. 00:32:43.932 --> 00:32:47.365 I'm going to ask you to just stand to your feet. 00:32:47.432 --> 00:32:48.833 Go ahead. 00:32:48.833 --> 00:32:49.900 Okay. 00:32:49.900 --> 00:32:52.165 Come on. Yes. 00:32:52.165 --> 00:32:54.000 All around the room. 00:32:54.000 --> 00:32:55.700 Come on. 00:32:55.700 --> 00:32:57.232 This is a moment between you and God. 00:32:57.232 --> 00:33:00.766 I'm not trying to conjure something up or manipulate you or anything like this. 00:33:00.766 --> 00:33:02.965 I care for you and want you free. 00:33:05.865 --> 00:33:08.766 Okay. 00:33:08.766 --> 00:33:12.665 So let's pray into the first part first. 00:33:12.665 --> 00:33:14.799 Nobody's going to know why you stood. 00:33:14.799 --> 00:33:17.799 This is between you and God. 00:33:22.432 --> 00:33:29.200 I'm going to pray over the disappointment area first, and then I'm going to have y'all repeat after me on the on the prayer forgiveness. 00:33:29.200 --> 00:33:32.200 Heavenly father. 00:33:34.365 --> 00:33:42.432 With your tender loving care come into our heart and heal the wounds of disappointment this morning. 00:33:42.432 --> 00:33:51.000 With your tender loving care come to the areas of our heart that we have faced disappointment and would you go there and minister to us? 00:33:51.000 --> 00:34:01.165 Would you show us how you've been with this through all the pain, all the heartache and all the frustrations? 00:34:03.299 --> 00:34:06.532 Would you please just show us this morning? 00:34:06.799 --> 00:34:11.632 We invite Holy Spirit, comforter into that to comfort our hearts. 00:34:11.632 --> 00:34:15.699 And we pray the balm of Gilead that would bring healing to those areas of our hearts. 00:34:15.699 --> 00:34:17.032 And our minds. This morning. 00:34:19.065 --> 00:34:24.233 You're a loving father who doesn't abandon or forget. 00:34:25.132 --> 00:34:29.532 So father, we pray over that right now. 00:34:31.032 --> 00:34:32.800 You're tender loving care. 00:34:32.800 --> 00:34:37.199 Your mercies over every area of the heart. 00:34:37.432 --> 00:34:40.733 And if you're if you're here right now, there's a there's there's people standing all around. 00:34:40.733 --> 00:34:42.032 Nobody's looking around. 00:34:42.032 --> 00:34:44.932 If you if someone else has popped into your head, I'm going to give you five seconds. 00:34:44.932 --> 00:34:47.099 And you need to stand and forgive them. 00:34:47.099 --> 00:34:54.500 I'm going to ask one, two, three. 00:34:54.500 --> 00:34:54.833 Stand. 00:34:54.833 --> 00:34:57.833 If you've got to forgive someone. Four. 00:34:58.500 --> 00:35:00.432 Five. 00:35:00.432 --> 00:35:01.300 Okay. 00:35:01.300 --> 00:35:03.333 More people are standing. 00:35:03.333 --> 00:35:06.333 All right, here's what I want you to do. 00:35:06.432 --> 00:35:08.032 I'm going to have you repeat after me. 00:35:08.032 --> 00:35:12.632 And then when I say the name of who you have to forgive, I want you to say it. 00:35:12.632 --> 00:35:14.132 You can say it quietly to yourself. 00:35:16.400 --> 00:35:19.465 I had to do this in my office this morning before I came up here. 00:35:19.465 --> 00:35:22.465 Okay? This doesn't. 00:35:22.465 --> 00:35:23.800 It's not right or wrong. 00:35:23.800 --> 00:35:25.599 Better than this is called life. 00:35:25.599 --> 00:35:27.599 This is called Christianity. 00:35:27.599 --> 00:35:28.932 This is what we do. 00:35:28.932 --> 00:35:31.932 We forgive. 00:35:32.565 --> 00:35:43.432 And even if it's just the first layer this morning, the first part of the onion being peeled back, it's that breakthrough. 00:35:46.900 --> 00:35:49.900 So I'm going to say, father, I forgive. 00:35:49.965 --> 00:35:51.432 And you repeat, father, I forgive. 00:35:51.432 --> 00:35:54.432 And then you say that name. 00:35:55.032 --> 00:35:58.032 Father, I forgive. 00:36:00.500 --> 00:36:03.500 You say the name. 00:36:08.666 --> 00:36:09.365 Repeat after me. 00:36:09.365 --> 00:36:09.833 The rest of it. 00:36:09.833 --> 00:36:11.932 Everybody in the congregation together. 00:36:11.932 --> 00:36:18.565 I trust you to handle that. 00:36:20.065 --> 00:36:25.699 Forgive me, in my judgment, towards that person. 00:36:29.300 --> 00:36:36.365 I trust you to handle it. 00:36:40.132 --> 00:36:46.800 I bless them and release them. 00:36:54.300 --> 00:36:56.333 Help me to forgive from my heart. 00:37:02.199 --> 00:37:05.632 Thank you Jesus. 00:37:08.465 --> 00:37:11.465 You can be seated. 00:37:15.199 --> 00:37:22.965 And the story of Joseph 17 years later, after his -- I think it was 17 or 15 years later, after his father dies. 00:37:22.965 --> 00:37:28.500 His brothers come to him and go, hey, you're going to get rid of us now, out of fear. 00:37:28.500 --> 00:37:33.500 Joseph's like, no, I forgave you, I forgave you from that day forward. 00:37:34.900 --> 00:37:47.365 I got the really cool opportunity of spending time with the ministry team this week with Colby, Lauren, Pastor John and can I say that we care for this church so much and we want to see you grow. 00:37:47.365 --> 00:37:54.932 That was a big part of our conversation, and we want to see anything that hinders the love of the father from those areas of growth in our hearts. 00:37:54.932 --> 00:37:55.365 Amen. 00:37:56.500 --> 00:38:04.365 So when you leave today, I want you to just meditate on that - Lord, who pops into my mind that I need to forgive? 00:38:04.365 --> 00:38:06.733 And one time, and one thing too, that happens for me. 00:38:06.733 --> 00:38:07.932 Everybody's different. 00:38:07.932 --> 00:38:11.565 Sometimes when I have forgiven someone, he shows me a picture. 00:38:11.565 --> 00:38:21.000 I see them differently, where he shows me something that I know, that I know that I've forgiven that person, and I'm going to believe he does the same for you this morning. 00:38:21.000 --> 00:38:22.699 So let me pray a prayer of blessing. 00:38:22.699 --> 00:38:25.699 Let's all stand to our feet. 00:38:26.932 --> 00:38:30.865 I want to pray a prayer of blessing over this house. 00:38:31.565 --> 00:38:41.032 If you just want to receive, get in the posture position right now and let the goodness of the father be poured out on you this morning. 00:38:41.032 --> 00:38:43.266 So, father, I bless this house. 00:38:43.266 --> 00:38:44.766 I bless this house. 00:38:44.766 --> 00:38:47.333 I bless this house in the name of Jesus. 00:38:47.333 --> 00:38:50.099 I bless this house in the name of Jesus. 00:38:50.099 --> 00:38:55.666 Lord, we thank you that you care for us so much that you have your rod and your staff. 00:38:55.666 --> 00:38:58.099 One is there to correct, the other is there to protect. 00:38:58.099 --> 00:39:08.565 And Lord, we thank you so much that you love us so much that you would send your son so that we'd have a personal relationship with you. 00:39:08.565 --> 00:39:13.833 So right now, I thank you for this house, Lord, that you would bless this whole house coming and going. 00:39:13.833 --> 00:39:15.632 You would bless them financially. 00:39:15.632 --> 00:39:23.432 You would help remember and remove anything that is hindering love in their life, Lord, that they could be a blessing to the community, a blessing to their family. 00:39:23.432 --> 00:39:29.132 And so, father, we just thank you Lord for a complete blessing from heaven above. 00:39:29.132 --> 00:39:30.565 We love you, Jesus. 00:39:31.599 --> 00:39:33.766 Amen, Amen, Amen. 00:39:33.766 --> 00:39:36.132 Well, church family, we love you. 00:39:36.132 --> 00:39:38.333 Have an awesome day. 00:39:38.333 --> 00:39:39.233 We'll see you next week. 00:39:39.233 --> 00:39:42.266 I'll be down front if someone needs some more prayer. 00:39:42.266 --> 00:39:42.800 Love you all.