JT Joey and the Bulletproof for BJJ team. Want to thank all of you for tuning in and supporting the podcast. Now you'll get to kick back , relax, and enjoy as you listen to some of the funniest moments from 2023, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Speaker 2:Better listen very carefully. A good martial artist does not become tense, but ready. Essentially at this point, the fight is over so you pretty much flow with the goal . Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limit this power? I'm ready.
Speaker 3:So every week we put out multiple episodes to help you on your jiujitsu journey. Now, it's a privilege for us to be in this position, but we want to ask one thing from you. And this is a very small gesture on your part, but it means the world to us. Simply hit the follow or subscribe button on whichever platform you enjoy this podcast on. It means the world to us. Thank you. It's hard. Jujitsu is really hard, and if you are not resilient, you will not last. Yeah. If you're not resilient, you will not last. Resilient <laugh> . Hashtag stay Brazilian <laugh> <laugh> Food section . Hydrolite Hydrolite. But hydrolite is pretty weak. Yeah . I gotta put two of those bad boys in water. And then I actually even get, I'll do three up the bum. That's the way. Absorb it. And <laugh> Salty rim. Huh? <laugh> The margarita Boy. <laugh> . Bulletproof submission only. Bulletproof submission only. Oof . Joey and JT Exhibition Match <laugh>. Everyone . That's the match. Everyone came round to see . Yeah . <laugh> . Joey's going. Nogi. I'll wear a Gee . <laugh> . Yeah. <laugh> . Joe Rogan. We can talk about podcasting, giving some advice. <laugh> . It'll be good. We'll be there. I can see you doing nose beers with Joe right now. <laugh> , bro . I can see me. What kind of beers are these anyway? <laugh>. <laugh> . They'll be me . Was this a pay lale , man , my heart rate's really high . <laugh> . God , can I tell the backstory, please. So the backstory is JT is a mad professor when it comes to building new things. And one of the things we build , and we're very good at building is, is training programs Right? For, for y'all . Now, here's the thing is that we've built more, way more programs than exist on our app. Yes. And it's just because we're like, oh , what about this? What about this? This would be sick . But we realized , actually, this is confusing a lot of people. So we decided let's just keep it at this for now. And, you know, refine and, and it's , and add things strategically of time. Anyway, JT iss like, bro , I built a sandbag program, <laugh>. And I'm like, dude, you know, great. Amazing one day. But right now not a lot of people have access to sandbags. I don't see it being a hyper , you know? And he agreed , like , yeah, okay. But he is , but actually I put it on the group. So we have our community shout out to our, our Facebook community, and I put a poll and I was like , what do you guys want to see? What , what , what program would you like to say? Say , I put like , uh, grip strength, neck strength , uh, I think Gas Tank. And I put sandbag in there and I'm like, everybody's gonna say sandbags. <laugh> . It was the lowest ranking . No , I like , oh , like two people were like, sure . No one . Everyone's like, yeah , a grip's sick. You know , like no one said sandbag in Joe's. Like, they don't want it. And I , I don't think I said anything. But then , you know , he did . But then surely a couple of months later, JT iss like, and I just wanna get this sandbag program. I'm like, bro, you saw the poll . People don't give a. He's like, god, it's so good. It's so good. Some lucky humans probably jts like other Facebook account pipes up on the group the other day and says, Hey Joey, jt, what do you guys think about sandbag training for BJJ <laugh> ? I was like, here we go. The floodgates are open. Now I do know some of those guys. Shout out Sambo community and also the Restless , uh, I'm actually a level one Australian certified Sambo coach. I just want you to know that <laugh> I did. I attended a two day workshop. What? I attended a two day workshop. How , how have you never brought this up before? I am . So there was a guy , uh, a Russian guy named Dmitri. Okay. Little dude. Sure. A little ball of energy. Classic Russian accent. Like just cool guy. Yep . Turned up when I was a blue belt, I think turned up at the gym that I was at the Dojo. Right. And was like, I am here to build Sambo community here in Australia. I'm running coaches course. Bring all of your students to course and you will become so , and my coach was like, well , we might learn some cool takedowns or some. Let's go. Yep . And so we paid like 150 bucks each or whatever. Yeah . We did this two day thing. They taught us some and then we got a certificate. It's like, you are now never one Certifi somebo coach. Nice. And I think he held a couple of comps and now he was trying to like, start a fire. You know , you get it going and , um, evidently didn't really go anywhere, but , but you know, one of the great New South Wales Sambo coaches is still here. <laugh> <laugh> . Cool. Hey , that's interesting. It sounds like a , a money raising scheme, but that's fine. <laugh> . But this is what I wanted to say. Relevant to the franchises, I believe Lineage mattered when there was sacred knowledge. Yes. It was like, and it was back in, it was pre-internet days where a lot of the came out. So there was no way to verify, right? No. So, and you had that, like you look at , um, Mac Dojo life and stuff. Sure. Martial arts was full of these charlatans who were like, still kind of is. I'm a , uh, you know, hyper color belt in Shin wsu . You know what I mean? pay me and I'll teach you the ways kind of thing. <laugh> . Yeah , a hundred percent . And so in a way that was jiujitsu were like, well, hey, we actually have this lineage thing where you can trace back every, you can trace back someone's belt. And that was very important then. It was. And, and I definitely believed that it certain, there was certain eras where certain gyms, oh . Woo . you up, bro. <laugh> my God . It's ah , tiger cloth . Ah , Panther Fetty. My goodness. I did a bit of kungfu back in the day. I know. What's up? Strong Panther fist right there. We'd love to hear it. I'll tell you a good one. Please. I'll tell you a good one. This was this, I got two. First was my , uh, my sister <laugh> . I'm Matt , I'm at home. I'm a , I think , I think I'm a blue belt. Right? I love how this starts. We're in the kitchen and uh , I'm like, fbe , you know, show me some jiu-jitsu. Like, where's it at? You know? I like try and teach her some when we're hang out . She's my older sister. And , um, my, we're in the kitchen. My mom's there, my sister . We're sit , we're at a table. Sister and I on this side, mom's on that side. So we get up and like feed puts her long , like skinny little bony arms around my neck. And I'm like, okay, cool. Yep . So hand inside the elbow. Nice now. Yep . Just line that elbow up. Like I'm just finessing it. And then I'm like, yeah , get it there. Cool. Now just give it a little squeeze. Yeah , give it a little squeeze. That's it. That's it. I'll, I'll tap when , and then I wake up and I'm looking, my sister's head is looking down at me, <laugh> and her head's upside down, and she's kind of giggling nervously, <laugh> in a bit of shock. And I'm like, whoa , whoa. And I look around and I'm lying on the floor. Wow. And my head's in her lap. She's like cradling my head. And I kind of look over to the table and my mom is crying <laugh> , because all, all my mom has seen is that my sister's applying this choke under my tuition. Yep . And then my eyes kind of flicker back and then I pass out and go, you're gone . And my sister is like, oh. Lowers me into her lap. And they don't know what the going on. Mom thought she'd just watch her baby boy get killed. You are dead. Yeah. And I was like, and she's like, did I just choke you out? And I'm like, ah . Yes. You're running away from a , uh, I don't know , attacker. A giant bear or an attacker. And you jump up to a branch and you have to try and get up. And this is actually like part of your answer, like, to get up there versus, holy, I've just gotta hang here until I fatigue and then fall down and die. Like, you know, you can now actually move up the tree or climb the wall to get into the festival. Whatever you're trying to do. You know, running away from security Yeah . From the festival <laugh> , which a note on that pullups are what's gonna save you, right? Yes . That's right . Because if you're trying to climb a fence, you can't chin up. Yeah . You can't go on it . You can only go overhead . Our new festival season program coming out this summer, <laugh>, get your pingers, get your mates, get your shirts off. Let's go get your pull-ups. Let's go right on that. I had the funniest little exchange in our small group the other day. Okay. Yep . So there's , there's five crew that trained with me in the mornings. Bulletproof crew, all Juujitsu players, and , uh, Pillen , shout out to Pillen , one of our boys. Yeah . mp great , great brown belt. He has these scars on his forearm that I've never kind of, I've noticed him , I've never asked about. I was like, bro , what , what's do with that? And he is like, oh . I , I went through a window when I was, when I was like 12, I think he said he was right or something, or young or a teenager. And , um, I'm like, what happened ? He said, oh , someone broke into my house and I was wrestling them. Oh, whoa . And I went through the window and I'm like, holy. Whoa dude. And , uh, he said, yeah, we lived in Glebe, right? And like, break-ins were a real thing. And I'm like, bro, that's so funny because another fellow in our group, Sammy Yeah . Who's been on the Jungle Brothers podcast, he also grew up in Glebe. Right. And he was telling stories on our podcast about when they used to break into houses and, <laugh> . And I'm like, I'm like, bro , he might've been the guy that broke into your house. <laugh> , that was so funny. And so did they then just, did you just have an EBI overtime match? I was like, boys, yeah, let's settle it right now. You want my Vegas story about the prohibition cocktails. So I'm in Vegas, I'm there for a Buck's weekend. This was some years ago. Years ago. I met up , there was a , it was a girl that I met years before Bondi, Joey in my, in my prime stage . I know Joey. And we hung out and whatever. Anyway , she's golden era Joey, I , I know, I know that she lives in Vegas. And so I , I touch base with her and she's like, Hey, let's get, I'm only there for a weekend, but she's like, let's get together on the Sunday night. Let's get together on the Sunday night. We'll go out for some drinks and then , uh, you can crash at my joint <laugh>. And so I'm <laugh> . And so I'm like, all right , sounds great. So I had this big weekend with, you know , the Bucks Group and whatever it was mad fun . But , um, we meet up and I'm like, Hey, what have you been up to? You know, catching up. She's like, oh , I'm working as a mixologist. And I'm like, mixologist. I'm like, what the a mixologist? She's like, oh , I make cocktails. And I'm like, okay guys. Oh , bartender. Right on . Yeah . I'm like all sick. I'm like , there's a thing going on here. And , uh, she's like, yeah, it's so cool. Like started talking about mixing drinks and whatever. And I'm like, oh wow. This is obviously like, something's very important to her. Anyway. She's like , um, hey, let's, let's go to this nearby bar. I've got some, I've got a friend that works at this place and we'll go get a drink. I'm like, cool, let's go. So we get to this bar and it's , it's at The Cosmopolitan, which is where we caught up . Yeah, we did. We went a DCC , right. A DCC . It was cool. Yeah . Yeah . That was where , where we met up in, in Vegas. Brought back a lot of memories. So anyway, we're at the Cosmo and we sit down at this bar and fella comes over bar two , he's like, Hey, what's up? And he like knew her and she's like, Hey, it's my friend Joey. And we , she's like, Hey, can we get a couple cocktails? And uh , guy's like, yeah, what do you guys want? And she said , um, I don't know what's cool, you know? And he's like, oh , I'm really digging, like prohibition style cocktails at the moment. So like, just hard liquor, no mixes, you know? And I'm like, that sounds cool, you know? Okay, sure. She's like, go for it. So he comes back with like two highballs that were just, I'm like, I'm like, holy. <laugh> like, what is it ? You know , like, what is not in this? Right. Just put putting a hole, burning a hole through the table . So we drink the thing and then , uh, she's like, let's move on. We'll go, there's another bar here in the Cosmo, which is the bar that we met at. Right. And , uh, with the big chandeliers and. Yeah. It's nice. Yeah. And , uh, so she's like, let's go then . So we go there and uh , she's got a mate that works at the place. Of course. We sit down, fella comes over, Hey, what do you guys want? She's like, I don't know what's cool. He's like, I'm really digging prohibition style cocktails at the moment. And she's like, oh yeah, I'm totally down with that. He's like, I sought you guys out. I'm like, man, dude. Comes up with another high ball full of. Oh God. We made it to like, I think we hit like four bars. Oh my God . And every had the same story. Oh my God. And I'm like, bro, can I just get some lemonade or some coke? Can we some So water some space out . Yeah. Like it was, I couldn't handle it, you know? Oh God. That's rough. So anyway, I'm not gonna take you guys through the rest of the night. No, but it got messy. And uh, that was probably like, that was probably, yeah. The time where I've last felt abused by alcohol. <laugh> just Joey didn't abuse alcohol. It abused him. Yeah. Got me. Good god . <laugh> . And now what are we doing? We're having an old fashioned , no . Yeah. So old mates like prohibition style . Yeah . We're like, yeah , we hit that prohibition stuff . We've been there before. Let's go. Me and a mate, Steve, we had eaten a couple of bars. The chocolate bars had like six or seven pieces. Well , how's the quantity? We , we ate like one or two. Dunno . Uh , our mate's just like, Hey, these has got mushrooms. If you guys wanna have it, they're there for you . Oh, wow . We're there. We had a couple of , yeah , we're like , go on , let's, let's eat some. So we ate a couple. Another buddy of ours, Omar, Dutch boy Omar , uh, turned up and was like, Hey, just wanted to see what you guys are doing tonight. What's going on? We're like, oh man, we just like had some of the mushy chocolate. He's like, oh. How much did you have? <laugh> ? We're like , we had two blocks. And he's like, bro, that. Okay, let's do it. And so he brought us back into the kitchen. He grabbed the , he's like, we eat the whole thing. Oh. He's like, we're here tonight. We do it. Finish the bars. I eat a whole one. Wow. So we're like, oh , Omar's the , he's , he was the godfather. Wow. He knew all the substances, had all the connections. Omar's instruction was, we can't leave the house. We need to just chill here. Okay. We need to create a haven for ourself. Okay. So we can like, set the lounge room up. So our three couches, we have a table in the middle, put some bread , uh, got some like, I think some Coke, salt , like soda, whatever, like as a , as a drink. Some water. We had cigarettes. We had a couple of joints. He's like, now we have everything we need. <laugh> . If we can chill that music on. And then we just chill back. And I remember , uh, I was a smoker at the time, so we're like, oh , let's go outside for a cigarette. Nothing had come on yet. And we're sitting just on the stoop, just outside the front door. I'm smoking a ciggy and uh , Omar and Steve are there next to me. And we're just chilling. And it was in like rural country where my mate's house was. So there's not many cars that pass by anyway. Nothing happens. And a few minutes later Steve pops up. He's like, did you guys see that man? Oh my . I look at each other and we're like, bro , nothing happened. <laugh> . And he's like, oh. <laugh> . And I was , and then I remember at that moment I looked at my cigarette and I had like half a ciggy left. And all I remember is that we were like laughing at Steve and the that, the thing that didn't happen that he thought he saw him there . And it was like 45 minutes later and I still got like, like a third of the cigarette. And I'm like. Like time had just slowed down. Yeah . So quickly. Time distortion. Yeah. I was like, holy man. And then, so yeah , we hung out, we're in the house and you know, it was a long night. went off. It culminated in Omar's mother, calling him at like 5:00 AM to tell him that Omar's wife had gone into labor. Oh wow . And that she needed to be, oh , Omar need to come pick his mom up, take her to the hospital because they , they were having , she was having her first grandchild. What ? <laugh> ? She was high as. <laugh> . Oh my God. Yeah . That was good. Wow. He tried to take us to the hospital with him. We're like, bro, we can't do it. We can't. We stay here. You go. Yeah , you have to come with me, man. We're like, no bro. You go, what a beast . Yeah. He's tripping on his first child. He bro smacked the outta him when he got to hospital. Of course. Course. Wow. Cruel irony. The mushroom chocolates came from his brother originally. <laugh> , there you go. At this time I was just, got my blue belt and just got back from Brazil. Probably had about what, six or seven words in Portuguese by this stage? 2009. Probably more than I do now. No , minus the tooth. So I was single at this time and I was going out, I was out with some friends. Yeah. We'd been to Big Mouth , which is a famous kind of bar cafe on the corner in St . Kilda. Been to a few places, no kick outs, but like, you know, the vibe dies down. You go somewhere else, you walk and there it's like 2:00 AM and definitely drunk. Totally drunk. And I didn't even want to be at McDonald's. I was like, there was a girl there. And I was like, oh , I think I've got a chance <laugh> . So I'm just like, yeah, you , oh , you're gonna McDonald's. I So are those guys. I love McDonald's. Yeah, McDonald's is great. No , but you know, you do what you can. We are there and we are with some Irish boys. I believe it was Sean and Owen, but his name was spelled like Karen , like C-A-I-R-I guy . Nickname . Yeah. But it was Sean . It was Sean . Yeah . Sean and I , and they were funny as hell. They were just rattling off intelligible Irish. But they were cool. While they were cool with me. I was cool with 'em . So they were kind of part of our group and we were near the front of the line, but someone had pulled a trolley up and was, there was a trunk girl in the trolley, sitting in the trolley. And she's saying, I'm trolley Molly. I'm trolley molly. <laugh> <laugh> . Like just, you know, the messiest scenario. You can imagine, you know, shoes off. Random guy peeing in a bush, or not that much in the bush. Yeah . Or in view of everyone. Someone's thrown up over there and everybody just trying to get some food. Classic Aussie sidewalk stuff. Oh God. Disgusting. Disgusting. I feel embarrassed to kind of admit. Anyway, I didn't know it. But these two boys, Owen and Karen , Sean , they could man, these , these guys were down a bang. And anyway, we're just standing there and someone threw a half empty cup of like a large Macca's cup of ice that had half melted. Oh right . Like someone had must have drunk it earlier and kind of left it there. And that people were just kind of like half riding , like give yourself food, like just hanging out. And someone just threw it at the front of the line. I think they were trying to throw it at the service window. Right. Fair. Yeah. And it hit Sean in the back of the head <laugh> . And he's like, what ? And snaps around dude's like, oh , you like, kind of caught out. Like I was kind of slightly bigger white Aussie dude. But he was like, oh , your head's in the way, <laugh> dude. It was just on trolley. Molly got pushed into me like, they just shoved this trolley. Molly got used as a weapon. She was sitting in the trolley and they just shoved the trolley into us and just smashed me in the back. And then it was just kind of on, because like Owen and Sean were like, nah , we're doing this. They just, they're skinny Irish dudes. They're swinging kicking. I was like, oh, it's on. And then dude just came for me and I was like , uh oh . I didn't even know the guy. He is just some very, very built islander guy. And I was like, oh my goodness, this is not gonna end well. He went to swing and I shot the double, it was just like an instinct. He went to swing, I just dropped, I hit the double, but I landed him and myself really hard on my knee, on like, on tiles, McDonald's tiles. And bruised the outta my right knee so I could barely stand up. So I landed him, he's kind of down. And then he just kicked me in the face and I was like, oh . And I was like drunk and now concussed. So I'm like, oh God, it's getting bad. I , I think Sean even punched me <laugh> , like it was absolute Millie and the chick , the chick in the Charlie's like, save, save Charlie Moley . He saved Charlie Moy . No way. She's just stuck. She's just losing it. It's chaos. So there's like three guys there, big white guy , um, islander guy and another miscellaneous ratty dude. And Sean Owen myself. And then other people are getting upset 'cause they're getting bumped. So I kicked , um, big white mate in the nuts and he fell back into a group of girls. Then their mates were like, you guys, you're up the line. We came from McDonald's, they jumped in. And I was like, oh no. So it was just, it was a total mess. Like , I can't say I used a lot of juujitsu other than I did do a bit of a foot trip, dude fell down some stairs and hurt himself. I was stoked. Um, <laugh> . And then it was , I , I eventually kind of fought my way out of the middle of it and then I was kind of outside of it watching it . And the Irish boys are in there going hard. Wow. And then the cops came and then the Irish boys kind of were like, oh . And then they saw me and they're like, bro, come with us. We'll go. And then the cops followed us and they arrested us. Oh , so you guys got pinched, dude . So then we end up at the buddy cop shop in um, St . Kilda. It's the big , like just off to the side. It's the biggest cop shop in the area. Turns out Sean was a lawyer. I didn't even know these. They were just like loose Irish boys. These were mates of yours? Or you just met 'em night ? No , just met 'em. 'cause they were with the girl who I was trying to kind of get with. Yeah . But she'd kind of disappeared and then I ended up with them. But they were pretty good at fighting. So anyway, we're there, they got us in the interview room room. They're like, are you boys? You know, public whatever, disturbance list stuff. And he's, and Sean's just really gone from drunk Ladd to No , I think you , uh, you'd be reviewing that videotape, wouldn't you? <laugh> ? And he is like, oh no, we've got you on tape. He's like, show's the tape. I don't believe you. You're gonna let us go. And they were like the cop , he had the cops shook. They're like, what? He's like, show us the tape . You can't hold us. You didn't have any evidence. You just showed up late . Why'd you pinch us? We weren't even fighting <laugh>. And the cops had nothing man. They were just, he just went from being the loosest dude to being like laser focused and just lawyer skills. It was like drunk Irish suits, <laugh> . He just got real serious. And I was like, my God. I , I initially, I was like, God, the Irish boys have got me in trouble, but whatever. It turned out to be a total Trump card. They ended up after about 45 minutes. 'cause he was just like, poison , don't say anything. So they tried to interview us separately. He's like , just don't say anything. And then they ended up letting us go. So then we are going on. And I was like, man, this has been a night. I'm going home. And Sean and Owen were like, no , we're going back. What's up ? I was like, what? We're done boys. You've been arrested. No , no, no. We're good. And they just rolled on shook hands. You two are legends. Thank you. See you later. I limped home. I had this massive fat edema on my kneecap. Oh yeah. It was like a jellyfish hanging off the front of my knee. Oh , brutal. And uh , yeah, just my neck was jacked up for getting kicked in the face and yeah, just drunk and concussed. Wow. Yeah. You're not Brazilian. You're not .