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Today's show is brought to you by Independence Day, celebrating America's three favorite things. Freedom, alcohol, and explosives.

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A noisemaker right here, boys. Whoa! It is our Friday. Oh my god. Can I tell you, besides the fact that I have to tell you that we have this going on. Mega Hato! Can I tell you yesterday uh a little bit about what happened, why I was not here?

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Oh, I thought you were going on the garbage plate world tour in Rochester.

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Did not do that, but something that we talked about about a week ago did rip through my mind yesterday. And I'm gonna set the world straight on that if I get there in this segment. If I get there, it might be a minute.

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It'll be other segments, which are always on demand, by the way.

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And always today, all over the place. This is our Friday. We have three days off. You don't know what you're gonna hear, but you'll have three days to forget about it, unless you listen on demand, in which case you can complain later.

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Then forget about it. Forget about it. Yeah, yeah. Forget about it.

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Just for the transparency factor of this, but without giving too much information.

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So mobotomy.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

Yes. Uh Tiffany uh and and and the colonoscopy at the same time. They went top and bottom and met in the middle. It was great. I was like, uh, anywho. So Tiffany has a few medical things, nothing that's going to like take her life or or end her life early. Good.

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But it's how would I get my diet coke fixed?

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You and any minute now we're gonna hear, do you guys get breakfast yet? And that'll mean a diet coke will show up.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

You just know how it works. Um, can I pause for one second? Well, sure. I'm sorry, but this is really important. So Tiffany uh loves Diet Coke, I love Diet Coke, and she'll come in to visit. I don't know how you have managed this, but she brought you breakfast this week. And I was like, wow, he has it dang good. Oh, I do. So she anytime she visits, she brings a Diet Coke. So now let me say this Dollar Tree. I saw this on TikTok last night. Dollar Tree has Diet Coke merchandise. Haven't actually seen it with my own two eyeballs, but come on now.

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It's a hot commod right now. Yes, every single time. And I just abbreviated a word for you, the commod.

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So anybody else who's a Diet Coke girly, find it and please DM me. But I'm not sure if you're not.

SPEAKER_01 2:14

I'm looking for a keychain that says Diet Coke. Looks like an old hotel room or motel keychain, you know, the the chain. You know, the kind of weird diamond-y looking thing.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

Yeah, I think I got that at a Hobby Lobby, but I do want to see what Dollar Tree has. Okay. Back to back to Tiffany uh has some some stuff, but it's not gonna kill her.

SPEAKER_01 2:33

No, and she does an extremely good job of advocating for herself in the medical uh well, I mean, because she's in the business too. I think she does an exceptional job of advocating and going further than the average person would. A lot of times you go to the doctor, you know that you're, you know, your arm's hanging on by a thread, and they're like, Oh, give it two weeks, and you're gonna be like, okay, the doctor said two weeks. Right. But in reality, you're like, it's hanging on by a thread here. Should I get a second opinion?

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Well, you know your body more than anyone else.

SPEAKER_01 3:00

So she uh she actually this was so interesting. She had gotten a referral to get genetic testing.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

And this is fascinating because I she doesn't think her mommy's her mommy?

SPEAKER_01 3:13

No, one of the questions. And it was a long questionnaire. One of the questions, and I I can't I can't be serious at a doctor's office. Oh, really? No, I can't. And and I even get a speaking to from, and it's not just Tiffany, it's been anybody in my life. I'll get a talking to because I can't hold it together.

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Are you talking to the guy next to you in the waiting room? Like, hey, do you have a excuse me, something just fell on my foot?

SPEAKER_01 3:37

Oh, okay. So I you here for that, Goiter? I I cannot, yeah. I no, I'm in there. And this was where it was interesting. The questionnaire that they go through, super likely, it must have been about a half hour of questions, but they go so deep. Then at the end, and I'll I'll come back to I told you I got the lobotomy and the proc and the colonoscopy met in the middle. Uh so they yeah, so they go through all this stuff. Then this other girl comes in and she goes, Okay, you qualify for genetic testing. Now, this is a really interesting field. We believe there to be about 22,000 genes that are our roadmap. We've got about 11,000 of them that we know of, and we've got, you know, X amount that are mastered, and then they're gonna test like 94 of them for her. And I I even told the girl, I go, Does she the master gene? You you you think I go, you think about this. This was the lady from the the clinic after very thorough. I mean, like questions I guarantee you've never been asked by a doctor. Can you give me one or no? Yeah, I'm gonna come to the one that that really almost got me in trouble. And uh and and and I go, you think about this. This technology is so new. It really was after the second world war that they would have even started the beginning stages to figure out this science. So we're talking under a hundred years, and we've come that far. She goes, it's incredible. She goes, if you want a career of lifetime of learning, this is the career to be in.

SPEAKER_00 5:05

Oh, that's so funny. I mean, think about even like whenever I listen to my true crime stuff, DNA testing came way later. I mean, it's it's essentially new science. It is.

SPEAKER_01 5:12

Okay, so it was fascinating. So, one of the questions on the questionnaire Are your mother and father of any blood relation?

SPEAKER_00 5:22

I can honestly tell you, my parents aren't, even though my dad is from West Virginia, but I do know somebody who it was like their six cousins once removed or something. I don't know. Something stupid like that.

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So after that question comes up, uh huh, which is a clear no, yeah. What does Scott do? Yeah, I got it. I I can't stay quiet. I can't stay serious. I go, well, if that answer was yes, I'm betting this uh testing would be over with real quick, we'd know the answer.