Scott & Ally on Demand

My man's body wash

7 Mountains Media

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0:00 | 4:15
SPEAKER_03

May I ask you a question about your bathroom?

unknown

Yes.

SPEAKER_03

I mean we've already discussed the fact that your breakfast smells like a steamed turd. So um but it tastes so good. I know. You know what? Certain things sometimes just have a smell that's different from the taste. And it's just one of those things.

SPEAKER_02

I think it's the feta cheese. Feta kind of has like a feezie smell.

SPEAKER_03

I am not a feta guy. Is there an alternate I can go with if I decide to try your recipe other than feta?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, Parmesan? Feta. Parmesan.

SPEAKER_03

Parmesan, Parmigan.

SPEAKER_02

Whatever you want.

SPEAKER_03

Parmesan from the Italian restaurant. Parmigian. All right, back to your bathroom. So um when you're showering.

SPEAKER_02

Yes. Did that this morning. Oh thank you. You're welcome.

SPEAKER_03

When you shower. Did I wash my hair? No. No. Well, that I I didn't even I don't even ask after 20 years. It's been four times in 20 years you've washed your hair. So uh Zach obviously spends some time at your house. Yes. Almost to the transition point, not quite yet, to being there all the time.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, he spends the night probably, I would say three, four nights a week.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, you're getting there, right? Yeah. So uh does he already have body wash and stuff in the shop?

SPEAKER_02

No, and do you want to know what? And do you want to know what? What he really needs to bring over his own body wash because I've got my elite top tier TJ Maxx body wash.

SPEAKER_03

Hit miss on whether it's on the shelf next week.

SPEAKER_02

But I've got two beautiful smells. One of them is Brazil nut, because that's my summer smell. And then when I if I ever take a shower right before bed, and this is more of my winter smell, but still it's there, it's the peppermint lavender eucalyptus up your butthole. I don't remember the name of it. And he's been going for that one. So I I picked up the bottle the other day because I just was curious because I don't know what he uses while he's in there, but I I can see that he hasn't brought his over. Uh-huh. So I pick up the pepper lavender. Peppender lavender. Eucalyptus up your butthole. And that bottle, that bitch is almost gone.

SPEAKER_03

I'm like cutting through it, huh?

SPEAKER_02

Well, you're closer. You go to TJ Maxx and you go get me another bottle.

SPEAKER_03

He'll never find it. He walk- you walk into TJ Maxx, a guy just all automatically goes brrrrr. They have one little section for guys at TJ Maxx up in the front there.

SPEAKER_02

Which I do love because it's got every stocking stuffer known to man.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, it's like, oh good, I get a boxer and a pair of boxers and pair and a belt. Yes. That's all I can ever find.

SPEAKER_02

Sometimes you can really get some awesome like Nike socks and things like that.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I mean, the socks, the the boxers and the belts are are in prime, you know, shape. Other than that, he's walking around in the store, I got a frying pan for sale.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, I gotta something on the frying pants. Here in a second.

SPEAKER_03

This is a guy in a in a TJ bag. So I want a bracket chips. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Is that a pickled pig's foot?

SPEAKER_02

Get the dull pickle pork rinds that you get at the front, and he's like, why am I standing here? I'll go start the car. Okay, bye. Get me out of here fast, fast, fast.

SPEAKER_03

Do you find that since he's using your lady-leaning body wash, that it's changing him into a woman?

SPEAKER_02

Well, he's a very sensitive soul anyway.

SPEAKER_03

Oh god, no wonder he uses yours and not brings his. But button but um I don't want her to see my oil of Olay.

SPEAKER_02

Well, it's weird because I really I wish he would use his because I love I think he wears game day because he'll even say if if I ever smell him, I'm like, oh, you smell so good. And he's like, game day.

SPEAKER_03

Game day.

SPEAKER_02

Huh, huh? He doesn't do that.

SPEAKER_03

What a huddle. Uh so uh listen to this lady. She has a theory.

SPEAKER_00

I accidentally used my husband's body wash in the shower this morning, and I already feel myself leaving my socks everywhere, forgetting my keys in my wallet, mo needing to mow the lawn every five minutes and talk about weed and feed and making Home Depot runs.

SPEAKER_01

And suddenly you're driving better and you have a logical way of thinking.

SPEAKER_02

I have absolutely had to use Guy body wash sometimes. If I uh I've never actually I've never spent the night at Zach's house.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, well.

SPEAKER_02

And I've been there, but never.

SPEAKER_03

If you have everything, why would you go there?

SPEAKER_02

Exactly. But I've been to my best friend's house and I have forgotten my, you know, I or I just didn't have anything with me. I wasn't expecting to spend the night. And I do like it. Yeah. But at the same time, I'm like, man, I'm sexy. Game day. Game day.