87. Introducing Civility School

Dolly Parton once said, "You Can't Fail at Being Yourself." Make yourself the best version possible. That is what Civility School is all about.

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No gum. Here we go. Welcome to the Kindness Chronicles where we hope to inject the world with a dose of the Minnesota Nice. It desperately needs. Hello Steve. Hello John. Back in the studio. KG is on assignment, the Minnesota Wild plays tonight. We're experiencing, one day of winter here in the month of February. Yep. They're doling out this one cold day that we get it all, some snow, some cold. I'm going to be in Phoenix this weekend and it's supposed to be warmer in Minnesota than it is in Phoenix. Yeah. It's psychotic, right? This is odd. Yeah. I don't want to complain about it, but I'm preparing for everyone to be complaining about the dry. Summer, right? Is that part of El Nino, dry summer? I don't know. Oh great, there's no water in our lake. Good God. Well, we had a guest that was lined up, but I don't know if they got stuck in the snow. I mean, we do have like a quarter of an inch of snow, so that's a very Good excuse today. That's very possible. So we're gonna just kinda Punt. But first, you've been sick. You've got good pipes tonight. Yes, I have a rich, deep tone right now. Very, very rich, Yeah, I was, uh, I was held up, I think, with COVID. I was just, just knocked out for almost a full week. It was bad. That's no fun. It's a lost weekend. And you didn't take a test? No, I didn't take a test. Just because What's the point? Well, because I knew, I knew, I know how to handle a cold and it wasn't reacting the same way and just all the, all the typical. ailments that come with it. It was just knocked Delta. I slept seriously from like Friday until I didn't get out of bed until Sunday. And once in a while, a little COVID you don't sleep good. So you don't really feel great, I suppose, but I feel great. And I just, I sound a little. Um, I would like to use this opportunity then, because we have this free time, to talk about a new program that we are launching on March 30th at Minnesota Masonic Charities, and I want to bounce some of these ideas off of you. Okay, so I'm listening, and I'm going to give you some reaction. You're going to give me some feedback as to what you think of this. Okay. And those of you that are listening, I often talk about the fact the secrets of masonry. Yeah. I'm gonna let you behind the curtain. What? You're gonna learn some secrets here. Okay. I've gotten approval from the Grand Master that I can talk about this publicly. Are you sure? Do you have to have a knife while we talk? Let's just not talk about those kind of details. But the first question I want to ask you is who would you say is the most influential person in American history? Superman. He's, he's high on the list, but like a real person, an influential person in American history, American history. So I obviously would have to know history and remember history very well to, to have a educated response, but, um, probably, you know, probably, uh, some leadership, think of people that might be on your money. Oh. Okay, so, uh, so Lincoln. Lincoln. I would put him right at the top of the list. Abe's, Abe's up there. So he's a five, he's the five dollar bill. Of course, Alexander Hamilton. Yep. I mean, they did a whole show on him. We know about him, yeah. Yeah. I could rap through that if you want. He's waiting in the wings for you. But let's, uh, who's on the one? Oh, George, George Washington. George Washington, of course. G. W. G. W. was a Mason. You might not have known that. Yes, I did know that because I've been hanging around you for a while now. That's right, and that's like, I talk about Hill Murray, St. Thomas, Masons. No, but I've also been to, to the Masonic, I, I helped. That's right, you did, did some videos for us. Video production and lots of history. So, yeah. I've seen the, I've seen the, the museum. Well, and, and what's interesting about George Washington, and George Washington is sort of, The ideal person to describe what this program is all about because of the way that he lived his life. George Washington, it's well known that he wasn't the greatest military strategist. He wasn't the most, uh, seasoned military leader, but the reason he was the commander of the Continental Army, is that what it's called? I think it was the Continental Army. Anyways, he was the commander, back in the day, was because of the way that he treated people. They said that regardless of your rank, George always made you feel like you mattered. George, paid attention to you, and he treated everybody with, dignity and respect. So how, so that instills A sense of, uh, being listened to, and Yeah, and you want to fight for this guy. leadership, uh, uh, okay. So, so, we use part of the civility school, and we call it civility school because civility is cool. And you will discover that Oh, see how that, see how he does that? You know, that's just creative. I was a marketing major because I couldn't do anything else. You got a button that says that? I should, but I don't. But George is also famous for, back when he was a youth, about 14 years old, he had a penmanship exercise and he copied down, uh, I think it was 140 rules of civility and decent behavior that was written by these Jesuit monks back in 1595. So these French monks, and it was translated into English and George, you know, practicing his penmanship was, he, he, he copied these down and they ended up being published. as part of the Federalist Papers Project. And it was called the Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior by George Washington. 140 of those babies. 140. And he got credit for them? Well, he kind of took credit for them. He kind of just moved them. I think this was before copyright was a big deal. Oh, oh, oh. But, uh. Even with the GW. Yeah, it's, it's. Oh, that's cool. It's very cool. we define civility as consistently noticing the needs of others without having to be noticed. And this is perfectly consistent with what we're doing on the Kindness Chronicles. Sure. I always like to describe it, you know, it's more important to be interested than interesting. so George, his life tenets, um, if you read any of the books, can really be boiled down to five things. It's about kindness and respect, it's about courtesy, dignity, honor, and humility. And Freemasonry, which is, uh, you know, was very important to him during his life, Um, Freemasonry is a system of morality veiled in allegory and illustrated by signs and symbols. Now that sounds very mysterious, but I'm gonna tell you a little bit about some of those signs and symbols. They say what's a mason? You know, what is an operative mason? What is a person who is a mason for a living? What do they do? That term has taken on so much mythology, right? It's gotten away from what it actually is. I mean, a Mason is a bricklayer, essentially. And what we use is we use as an allegory some of the tools of a bricklayer to explain, what we are hoping that people that become a member of the fraternity will embrace. The whole idea behind Masonry is to help Men, forgive me, it's a men's organization. Ah. But it's to help men become the best possible version of themselves. Okay. And an example, one of the working tools that we talk about is the 24 inch gauge. So a 24 inch ruler. And what we use that for is it's an allegory for your day. You've got 24 hours in your day. Yep. And if you break those into three equal parts of eight, You know, you should spend eight hours on rest and recovery. You should spend eight hours on your job or your vocation, whatever that might be. And it's really about those other eight hours that's most important. How are you going to use those eight hours in your life? Are you going to be a person that that serves others or are you going to be a person that just serves yourself or some combination thereof? Okay. So, we use the 24 inch gauge. We also use this allegory of, um, you know, imagine yourself as a, as a, as a young person as this rough stone. when you're in high school, you're still trying to figure out, you're going through puberty, trying to figure out what kind of a person that you want to be. But we use this, we use the term rough ashlar, which is another name for a rough stone. And as masons, we're desirous of shaping and polishing ourselves to become the best possible version of ourselves. So, imagine you're this rough stone and what I will explain in, civility school to the young people that attend is, you know, chip away at the sharp edges, chip away at those things that are superfluous. Um, Like work on yourself. Work on yourself. You're judged by the company you keep. Oh yeah. PJ Flex says it perfectly. He says, If you hang out with turds, you're going to end up in turdville. So surround yourself. Such a coach phrase right there. It's such a coach phrase, but surround yourself with people that you're going to be proud to be friends with. People that are making, you know, that are using those eight hours for, uh, Selfless purposes as opposed to selfish purposes. Got it. The working tool that we use for that is a common gavel and a chisel. So you chip away at those rough edges. And again, Symbolism. A lot, it's the symbolism of just chipping away at those things because you gotta get rid of the rough edges before you start polishing and doing those. So your, your civility school training that you're telling me about right now. Yep. You're using Masonic, uh We're gonna sneak the Masonic stuff in. Got it, got it. And essentially what I would say is that Just so you can explain it, because you understand that very well. Similarly to Masonry. Yeah. What Civility School is, is Civility School is a program about civility. Veiled in allegory and illustrated by YouTube videos and storytelling, okay? So got to keep those kids interested, right? You got to meet them where they're at and I think that that having you know showing YouTube videos for starters They don't have to listen to me the whole time and there's so much good content such great content out there people doing cool stuff Starting with kindness and respect, there are so many great videos showing kindness and respect. And if you're a person that looks at those things, the algorithms will catch up with you and you'll get bombarded with those things. I know, you and I are, you know, we see the same videos because we're, we're, we're into this stuff. I know. And it's a good, it's a good like buzz, you get a little fix of uh, oxytocin, like there you go. Yeah, so we did People are People are alright. I can get through the day. We did an exercise back in 2016 when my son was a senior in high school. And, uh, we invited a bunch of kids from his football team to come to civility school and there were juniors and seniors at this thing. Okay, so this is something you've had for a while. So, it was something that we tested out a long time ago. I remember you telling me about this when we first met up. Yeah, and what we did is one of the things that I asked them to do is I asked all the kids to bring their yearbook To the program. Yeah. And they're wondering what's this all about. And I used the movie The Breakfast Club. as an example of, the popularity spectrum. Yeah, you got the range of kids. You got that whole range of kids. So you've got, you know, the jocks, you've got the, the princesses, you've got the brainiacs, you've got the people that are the rebels. The outcasts. And then you have the outcasts. And, and in sociology those people are referred to as rejected or neglected people. most of these guys are part of a football team so they're part of something. But I said to him, think about those people that are in your school that aren't a part of something like that. They just don't belong to anything in particular. And maybe that's what they prefer, but usually not. They're figuring themselves out. They don't know where they fit. I would expect, right. Um, so what I ask them to do is pull out their yearbook. Go through their grid and identify, find two or three people that they've either never seen before or that they've just never noticed before. Because chances are, if you haven't noticed them or you haven't seen them, lots of others probably feel the same way. What, what gave you that idea? That's a great idea. I don't know. Just looking at your yearbook? I think about like in a lunchroom, when you're an isolated person, when you're a person that is alone. In a lunchroom, your isolation is more exposed than anywhere in a school. You've got an assigned seat. It's a flag. Yeah, look at me. I'm nobody's Now, I would argue, because I'm married to an introvert I would argue that maybe as an adult, people choose that, but in high school, you're, you're in such a volatile spot. Right? Yeah, you do need connection of somebody, and yeah. Prefrontal cortex is not developed, and it's just, it's an awkward time. Yeah. I don't think anybody So I don't necessarily feel super comfortable as a high school student being alone. So when you go to a new school, and yeah, I went through all that. So what I did is I, exactly, so what I did is I, I challenged these guys to, go back to their school. This was done in August for, you know, the first day of school. And search those people out and just greet them by name. You know the old Dale Carnegie thing that the best sound in the world is the sound of your own name. So just go and reach out and connect with those people and just see what their reaction is. I'm just freaked out some kids. We prepared them for the fact that some people are going to be like, how do you know me? And they're like, well, we go to school together, maybe you don't know me, I'm so and so. So we prepared him for that. And the first day of school, I get a call from one of these students. And the student said, this is one of the guys that was in the program, in the class. And he said, uh, I was searching out this other student, and literally he was the first person I saw when I walked through the door of the school. Super weird. And he's like, I had seen him before, but I never really had paid attention. I didn't even know that he was in my grade. Right. And I just went up to him, and I greeted him by name, and the response was just as you expected, how do you know me? And this kid says to this other student, you're the first person that's called me by name. That's not a teacher. Wow. And when he's telling me the story, you could tell he was pretty emotional about it. So one of the things that he did is he went around the lunchroom for the first couple of weeks of school. And found a bunch of those kids that were essentially sitting alone and brought them all together. They sat at his table, not right with him, but just kind of sat at his table and started conversations with these kids. And most of these kids are introverts, they're shy. But some of those kids to this day have become very good friends. So the idea behind this, this yearbook exercise is one is acknowledging the fact that there are young people in every community, every school, every, that just aren't connected, but probably want to be connected to be connected to somebody. And really, and I think COVID has only amplified those challenges that we have. Well, because of social media is create status with people. And yeah, it's, you're in groups and you, everyone knows what's going on with everybody and yeah, I don't, I can't, I can't even imagine how much more complicated, it serves as a really nice opportunity for people to talk about, ways that they can be kind and it's, it's a very interactive. So, okay. We, I got to go back. No, I'm, I'm, I'm fascinated with this, but when you had those boys over, did they know they were kind of. Did you sign them up or was it just like, Hey, it was kids that it was kids that my son had invited to come over and it wasn't here at my house. We, we did it at, uh, the North star museum of boy scouting and girl scouting. Cause they got a great community room and they're probably 25. Okay. So it was kind of formal about it. It was very formal. Okay. Okay. It was just like, Hey, you guys, uh, bring your yearbooks. I want to do something. I put together this program just cause I'm into this stuff and I clearly had more time on my hands than I needed. You know, what's also funny, John, like I've, we've talked about this many. Many, uh, many shows ago, but you must have been kind of like this in high school. You must have had some recognition of that in high school because you did that for me. I remember the story. Yeah. You were one of the first people that I knew that I met that was in my brother's grade, two years older than me. And so it wasn't any kind of scuffle going on. It wasn't like getting picked on, but it was clear that I didn't know where I was or something. Yeah. And, and you were like, Hey, wait. Who are you? Dan Brown's brother? Like, or you asked me who I was, and you said, Here, I'll show you. Come here. I'll show you where you gotta go. You pointed out something for me. You helped me through that. The fact that you remembered that. And I said to my brother, Who is that? Who is John Schweitzer? He goes, Oh, he's a really great guy. Why? Oh, nice. Thanks, Dan. I said, Why? Because he helped me today for no reason. So. Very similar. So you must have had that kind of awareness as a kid. One of the things Senior in high school. One of the things, and this is very embarrassing, and I think I mentioned it maybe once or twice in the podcast, but one of the things that I would do in the bathroom Well, hold on. Yeah, I'm gonna get there. No, I would, I would study my yearbook. Okay. Because I wanted to know people's names. Huh. And, like, I tried to make a point of walking down the hall and saying hello to as many people as I could. And do you think some of that was, you, you got a good buzz out of it because people Totally. And, and people Totally. And part of it was, I mean, part of it was, I was a politician. Yeah. Frickin born that way. No, I, I mean, it was It's, it's very odd, but I did, I felt like I connected with a lot of people and I enjoyed it. I'm sure there's people out there that think I was a dick in high school, but no, I, no, I think it comes out, you do it, you handle it right. But it's such an interesting thing that you were kind of keyed that in that way right away. So then you had this class for these kids. So I had these, the class, that was your first time you, you put this little thing together. Yeah. I put together this. What was your goal? A lot of these guys were football players. And one of the things that we talked about was sportsmanship, you know, sportsmanship is a way of showing, honor in the way that you conduct yourself. And I said to him, and I said, this is going to be a damn good football team, and they were. They didn't lose a game during the regular season. And I said there's going to be a lot of touchdowns scored and we played this video as one example of Barry Sanders scoring touchdowns. Yeah. And what did Barry Sanders do every time he'd score a touchdown? He'd hand the ball to the ref. Yeah. He didn't, you know, he didn't jump around like a lunatic. He didn't draw. attention to himself. He's doing his job. He just did his job and he realized, and as Barry Sanders always talked about, he's like there were eleven guys on the field that helped me score that touchdown. That's not my touchdown, that's our touchdown. Yeah. So I explained that to these guys. Did it sink in a little bit? Absolutely. That's cool. Sure enough. I mean, you know, there was some celebration but for the most part um, TJ Tumbleson and Jalen Fry and uh, there were Those were the guys that scored probably the most, Andy Voyan, guys that scored the most touchdowns, Graham DeVore. When they'd score a touchdown, they'd just go flip the ball to the ref and go back to the huddle. And it's an era of celebration for those. That era was definitely the kids, uh, the, the, the major athletes of the time were all creating video game, you know. Absolutely. Routines and everything. So, yeah, so to, to teach them to do that and make them see how cool it is to not do that. That's exactly right. Civility is cool. It's, it's showing them. Oh, and the button. And, you should, we should, we should make buttons. How about t shirts? Um, but they really, they, they, for starters, it was a really good team. And they crushed the opponents, uh, up until they got to the state tournament. And there were so many touchdowns scored. As I mentioned before, Jack was a quarterback, not to be confused with the quarterback of the football team. Our team was so good that Jack played probably as many downs. Because they had a nice cushion. We had a big cushion at halftime, and the coaches, like, for starters, I don't want to step on the necks of these guys, because Dave Metzel, Dave Metzel is that kind of guy. Like, he is All about kindness and civility and just a wonderful coach. Yeah. Um. But, Jack and this Drew Selman got, to split the time in the second half of damn near every single game. That's cool. Anthony Praml was the starting quarterback and he deserved to be the starting quarterback. He was a very talented athlete. The point of all this is when you're a person on a team, not only do you represent yourself, you represent your team, but you represent your family, you represent your school, you represent your community. And there was kind of this funny buzz, like people were seeing that they were doing this. Well, fast forward a couple of weeks, and I got a call from a couple of athletic directors. Bill Lechner from Hill Murray, and the athletic director from North St. Paul High School, and there was one more, and forgive me for not remembering. But they said, something's going on over there, what are you doing? And we organized a, essentially a civility school for the whole Metro East Conference. And I asked each one of these activities slash athletic directors, send to this thing your version of influencers that would check the boxes of a breakfast club. I don't want a whole bunch of athletes necessarily. Let's have athletes, people from the band, people that are academic achievers, the whole thing. Send them all, and we're gonna go through this program. Another thing that we showed, for sportsmanship, if you have an opportunity, if you're near your, your Computer. there's a tennis player named Jack Sock. And Jack Sock, we've talked about him before. There's a video of him playing against, Leighton Hewitt. I think it's like at the Australian Open or something like that. Leighton Hewitt serves the ball. The side there, the line judge calls it out, Jack Sox says, add Ozan if you want to challenge it. And the crowd just kind of Why in the world would a, would a tennis champion negate his own play? Exactly. In fact, here, I'm just going to play this so you can listen to the audio. Got it already. Get your mic down in there. There we go. He said that was in if you want to challenge it. And the whole crowd is like, yeah, they're going crazy. He says, go ahead, challenge it. And Leighton Hughes is like, no, no. You know what? I'm going to challenge it. The Brits are just, no the Australians are just freaking out. So they're waiting for it. And they show the Otherwise he's going to look like a goose, and I think he's confident when he goes into it. Let's see the results, and it is in. So they show the video, and People go crazy. They go crazy, and that type of sportsmanship is so rare, so rare, that it was one of the lead stories on the Today Show the next day. That's how I found out about this. Leave it to tennis, too. This video, well, and the point is, so here's what's interesting. I read somewhere that in a five Set match. There are like 300 points contested during a typical five set match. That was one stupid point. Yeah. Jack Sock, which is an unfortunate name, um, but he will, like these videos have been viewed 15 million times. Well, thanks to you promoting them all the time. I'm promoting the hell out of it. Absolutely. Yes, that is a great example. What I was going to say is, this civility school has already been tested. I mean, you've So, yeah, we did it. You've done this years ago. Yeah, and it was very, it was very fun. And it was just kind of a, we actually took off, we obviously did it for the whole region. Well, we did it for the Metro East Conference, so there were ten schools that attended. And that was actually where we asked the students to fill out the first, Selfless Scholar nominations. Okay. We invited the kids, guys like Scott Berg and Marty Rathmanner and some of those guys all chipped in some money so we'd have some money for the scholarship, which is now, we've taken it over at Masonic Charities because, We have access to, to those kind of funds, we also, discussed the topic of dignity and the power of an apology and the power of, uh, of forgiveness. And this is the video that we played for that. And I'm going to play this. This was from, uh, ABC News, Diane Sawyer, a few years back. And we turn now and shift tones to the topic that, well, it was nearly impossible to find any place where people weren't buzzing about it today. We are talking about the missed call in Detroit, denying pitcher Armando Galarraga a perfect game. Beyond the debate, should that call be overturned? Should baseball finally adopt instant replay? We saw something more important happening on the field, and here's John Berman with that. Ground ball, right side. It was a bad, bad call. He's out! Oh, he's safe! Utter disbelief on the face of pitcher Armando Galarraga. Denied a perfect game. A feat accomplished by only 20 other pitchers ever. Denied because umpire Jim Joyce called the runner safe on what was clearly an out. You can see the tag on the bag well before the runner gets there. It would have been the last out. Why is call was extraordinarily bad, what followed was simply extraordinary. In a game of barrel chests and big tempers, umpire Jim Joyce apologized. This is a history call. And I kicked s t out of it. And there's nobody that feels worse than I do. And I took a perfect game away from that kid over there that worked his a off all night. And 28 year old Galarraga, with every right to gripe, did everything he could to make Joyce feel better. Nobody's perfect. Nobody's perfect. Everybody makes mistakes. And at the game today, a moment of supreme sportsmanship. The two men at home plate. You could see Joyce wipe the tears from his eyes. And from the fans, the support I got today was, I, I, I'll be honest with you, I missed the eye. Baseball's commissioner said today there is no dispute that last night's game should have ended differently. And he promised to review expanding the use of instant replay in baseball. But he will not reverse the blown call. There is virtually no precedent for that in baseball. This game will never be forgotten. This game will be talked about forever. You might say that one man missed the chance to be perfect, but two men seized the chance to be good. And being good in life trumps being perfect in baseball. Pretty good story. Yeah. Serves as a vehicle for getting people to talk about opportunities in their lives where, people make mistakes. Yeah, forgiveness. Forgiveness and, an apology. It's amazing. I always think back to, when the steroid thing happened in baseball. Mm hmm. And all of these players were denying that they, that they did steroid, steroids. And a pitcher for the Yankees named Andy Pettit, he came right out and he said, I took them. He said, I needed a competitive advantage. Yeah, they're all happening, so, they're all doing it. And, and I, I took them. And he was very apologetic about it. And people never mention Andy Pettit when they talk about Jose Canseco and Mark McGuire and Barry Bonds. No one ever mentions Andy Pettit because he just acknowledged that he screwed up. He kind of got himself out of it by being honest, being real. Right, and society appreciates that. So we, we spend some time talking about that kind of stuff. Okay, um, now, now, a comment, right? Yeah. Now, in the civility school, you might have some people who don't know sports as well. Correct. Do you have any other videos that aren't sports? We have a whole bunch of videos that aren't sports. That's my only comment so far. We do a piece on manners and etiquette. Alright. And the manners and etiquette thing is actually kind of fun because, it's everything from, how do you conduct yourself on a date? dating etiquette. Yeah. And we teach them old school dating etiquette. get in the door for your date. So there's an age range for this thing? This is, you know, usually like middle school and high school students. And you know, but it's Formidable time. Yeah. it's when your brain is, discovering these things. And there are things that many people teach at home. Yeah. Um, many people don't, which is sad. Yeah. but it's certainly not something that they have time to teach in school because they're, Trying to teach, uh, just trying to get through. Yeah. They're trying to chase scores, you know what I mean? They get evaluated based on the scores. But one example that, uh, that I use is we taught the kids that, if you're at dinner with a date and your date gets up to like, go to the restroom, you should stand up and when they come back, you should stand up again. Yeah. And they come back. So these guys, uh, there was a group of like 10 couples that, that, that went to this homecoming dinner. Yeah. Uh, in the fall of 2016. After they'd taken some civilies, right? And four of the 10 guys in the group had all gone through it and they were all prepared for this. Yeah. The minute one of the gals got up. They all, the four of them popped up and so the girls freaked out like, what the hell? Well, everybody was like, what are you doing? And these guys, it's so super unheard of, but it was one of those things where. These guys, because their peers weren't aware of it, they kind of felt like they had one option. It's not cool, yeah. And then when they came back, they popped up again, and by the end of the dinner, they were all doing it. It's a little tongue in cheek, but also It's, it's totally tongue in cheek, but it's, it's acknowledging The fact that, there is a way to conduct yourself. Respect and manners, and yeah. And, of course, in the crowd, there are people that are like, what if the, the gals are, are offended by the fact that we're treating them like this? Yeah. And my response to that was, You don't want to date that person. Like, if a person gets mad at you for getting the door for them, it's time to look elsewhere. True. Seriously. That's a, that's a, quite a sign of like In fact, in fact, have you ever seen the movie, um, A Bronx Tale? I love that movie. Love that movie. Yeah. When Chaz, Paul, and Terry tells the, the kid. I'm surprised we haven't talked, do we talk about that with KG yet? I don't think we did. Oh, it's classic. But you, you remember the sign of a woman that you want to date is you get the door for, and if she reaches across and unlocks the door for you, that's a woman worth keeping. And he gets the door for this gal. And he's slow motion, slow motion. Yes. Open it. She opens it up and he's walking across the back and he gets this look on his face. Like, yes, this is a good one. Does that kid look like a young Robert De Niro or what he does? You know what happened to that guy? What happened? He got, uh, he, he was involved in a murder. He's in prison. Oh boy. Yeah. His, uh, I can't think of what the actor's name is, but yeah, I mean, he was in a bunch of good movies. Cologio. Cologio. Cologio. C is what they called him. Yeah, C. Um. That's a great movie. It was a great movie. So, that's part of your assignment is to, uh, to go check that out. Yeah. So, anyways, um. Okay. So. So, we do use some non sports videos. Yes, indeed. Uh, hey, no, nothing wrong with sports videos. I'm, I'm, actually, I really appreciate them. No. But sometimes it's nice to. If it's not, if it's all sports, then it's, you know. Yeah, I mean, there's, we use some clips from the Breakfast Club. There are some teachable moments in the Breakfast Club that are just classic. You know, there's one, uh, there's one scene where, um, John Bender, remember John Bender? Yeah. Who was played by Judd Hirsch, I think is it? Or Judd? No, Judd Nelson. Judd Nelson. Judd Hirsch is a little older. Yeah, he's the guy from Taxi. Alex Rieger. Alex Rieger. Oh my God, we're old. Anyways, Judd Nelson, is talking to Molly Ringwald, who's the princess, and they're talking about the clubs that she's in, and they're mostly social clubs, then he looks at Michael Anthony Hall, who plays the Brainiac and says, Are you in any clubs? And he says, Well, yeah, we're, I'm, I'm in math club and You know, we talk about properties of math, and I'm in physics club, and Bender, looks at Molly Ringwald and says, So, he's In some clubs that are social, sad, but social. And, acknowledging the fact that, people are going to have different interests and to just be respectful of the fact that people are involved in those things. And, you know, right now we live in a world that is totally politicized, right? I mean, it's everywhere. And one of the things in masonry, You cannot talk politics. It's against the rules. You're in big trouble if you do. Yeah. To the point where you can get kicked out of the lodge. That's amazing for you know, middle aged and elderly men that are in these clubs like to not have to get involved in it. You know, they do a little bit. But they would never do it like in an open lodge. It's just, it's just sort of this understanding. Okay, so is that the same kind of thing with civility school? You're kind of saying, does that tie in where it's just, don't get involved in And I think that, we live in such a divisive world right now. My advice or our advice to these young people is look for the common ground, look for the commonalities as opposed to the differences. Yeah. And just be respectful of the fact that people aren't going to have the same Opinions is you do. Yeah. And when you go down that road, all it does is it creates, you know, we talk, we've talked about this many times, but like Facebook on Facebook, the people that you're connected with are referred to as friends, their Facebook friends. Yeah. Okay. Don't be political on Facebook. Don't be that guy because what you're doing is you're probably alienating half of the people that are your friends. Yeah. social media can be a place where you can blow up a career if you post the wrong thing on social media. Yeah. But beyond blowing up a career, it's, it's alienating people that are supposedly your friends. Yep. Or as Joey Tribbiani would say, supposedly are your friends. It's a friend's, a friend's reference. Yeah, we haven't come up with a Seinfeld one yet. I'm sure we will before this, uh, this, oh my god. Yeah, we're going here. Look at the time. Um, but anyway, the, the, the reason I'm, I'm talking about this and for the two of you that are still listening, Um, if you have any, We're signing up for class. If you have any suggestions, On things that you think it would be important to cover. And I've, you know, I've been talking about this as I've been out visiting with people when I was down in Florida. So you're kind of restarting this idea? We're restarting it. Okay. So we're gonna, we're gonna launch it and here's why. Yeah. So in a Masonic Lodge, when you ask people, you know, there's a Masonic Lodge in White Bear over by the McDonald's on 61. Yeah. Do you know about that Lodge? Um. Probably not. But when you ask people that are aware of that Lodge, what is that Lodge known for? Pancake breakfasts. Really? Yep. That's, it's like there's so much more that goes on in that place. Yeah. Than pancake breakfasts. It's about this kind of stuff. It's, conversations about how can you be a better version of yourself. Yeah. And. Most of the young people that will come to this will be coming because their parents have suggested it. And they're people that probably already are aware of a lot of these things. And are living this. It's just, I think it's fun to have a place where young people can talk about this stuff. And my experience, the two times that we did it, seven or eight years ago, Was very positive. I mean, the kids really kind of digged it. They got, is it dig it, dig it, they dug it, they dug it. Yeah. Right. Oh, daddy. Oh yeah. Well, I think also, um, yes, I would imagine kids are craving stuff like this. Something that's actually outside of their stupid, you know, lives of, you know, social media and like, you know, their phones and all that, like something that actually teaches them something about. How to be with people. But we don't want to completely abandon social media. And to me, YouTube is an example of social media. this is a place where you can consume this kind of stuff. These stories are out there. There's all kinds of stories. There's this wonderful story. Again, it's a sports story of this wrestler who was undefeated and he was wrestling another guy that was undefeated. So the crusher versus the mad dog, the chump. No, not those kind of wrestlers. Actual, like, really high school wrestlers. Real wrestlers. Got it. And the one, uh, young man, uh, was losing. He was down like eight to five in points. And the guy that he was wrestling with dislocated his elbow. So the guy that was losing, when they restarted. He could have just pinned this guy in a second. Because he knew he had a weakness. He had a weakness. He's hurt, yeah. But instead, he just laid there and let the other guy win on points. And the crowd went absolutely wild. Because, and then they interviewed him afterwards and he's like, I was losing, he was beating me, it just wouldn't have been right for me. In fact, you know who Steve Hartman is? So Steve Hartman is a guy on CBS that does these human interest stories. And Steve Hartman, this was a Steve Hartman story. Yes. And, uh, I could play the video for you, but I've played enough videos for, um, I'll probably get in trouble for, uh, copyright infringement. But, the humility. That it took to do that, he could have continued to be an undefeated wrestler. And he said, I probably look kind of weak doing it. And Steve Hartman's like, he goes, that was the greatest strength I've ever seen out of an athlete to, to do what was right. And even the referee started applauding. this is how you're to conduct yourself. Just super, very cool. Maybe it's more sportsman school than civility school, but no, because you, you. I like the manners aspect for young people. Especially, you know, they're going to have chances to go to formal dinners and things like that for proms and that's great to give them things like that. Yeah, and we talk about things, everything from, when you start your day, make your bed. There's that great book, first comma, make your bed. You've accomplished something that day. It's something you have control over. We talk about the fact that, if you're at a dinner party, And people are wrapping up their food. Be the guy that starts clearing the plates. Be the guy that does that. Now, and you might edit this out, but John Sweeney has a book. Oh yeah. About this similar. It's it's in my bathroom. I know. And I, I, I subscribed to him. Another book in my bathroom. We gotta have a, we should maybe talk to him. Cause it's a brave new workshop. Is that what he is? John Sweeney. And it's, it's not called civility, but it's, it's. It's like civility is in the title rules to life and and and those are the simple things and it's it's great It's like little tips every day that he gives you and it's it's all common sense stuff, but it's just reminders of ways to To chip away and see chip away using my words. Yeah You want to polish, and here's why. The bottom line is we use the square and a compass and we use a level, I talk about meeting on the level, I've mentioned that before, and the whole idea is, if you are the most, uh, polished version of yourself, When you're in a group with a group of people that are also polished versions of themselves when you apply The cement of brotherly love you're going to create a much stronger Structure you're going to create a much stronger society Because people are aspiring to be the best version of themselves and we are brought together By the cement of, uh, of, of connection. Connection. That's cool. It really is. The more perfect the stones are, the more perfect the, and more strong this structure is going to be. And it's, I think it's a perfect allegory for society. The more people that chip away at those rough edges and. meet with others on the level, it just creates a stronger, stronger connection and stronger society. And that's all I have to say about that. I like it. I like it. I don't, I don't have any criticism of it. I've heard some of this before. I think it's an awesome idea. I think you're a great person to present this because I'm sure you do it with humor and with, uh, Try. With a fun kind of angle because you know, you know kind of what you're trying to get out of people and Um, it's sort of an entertainer in you is, is, would be a, nobody loves to hear himself talk more than me. Um, and it's very true, but it's fun. It's not just me that's putting it on. There's a couple, there's a guy named Reed Endersby and this, this guy from Germany named Marcus Mueller. We all kind of divvy up what we're doing. But. Generally speaking, it's, it's meant to be fun, it's meant to be conversational, it's meant to meet young people where they're at by using social media. I have mentioned on this, uh, you know, that many people say that social media is one of the biggest Problems in society, but I also think that social media can be one of the greatest, um, assets for changing the way that we think. Yeah. It's all about what your algorithms are. True. If your algorithms are to watch, you know, people getting beat up, yeah. That's one thing. But if your algorithms are, to watch videos of of soldiers coming back. Yeah. I mean, I could watch that people Healing Dog be helping dogs, people, people that are doing, uh, kind. Acts for people that are, they, they go, Hey, you know, can I borrow a dollar? I'm going to, I'm hungry. And they go, well, hold on. They get some money and they go, why'd you do that? Like, oh, clearly you need a dollar. And then you got Mr. Beast. You know who Mr. Beast is? I know about him. Yeah. So Mr. Beast will do that and, he will have somebody that looks homeless asking somebody who also might look homeless for a dollar. Yeah. And if they give him a dollar, Mr. Beast will go over and give him 10, 000. That kind of stuff. It's, it's crazy. It is. And it's because it's, it's kind of, it's not just about like, damn, I got this bunch of cash now, but I'm seen. Someone saw me and I did something. Uh, out of the goodness, of my kind heart to help somebody who clearly asked for it. that's a pure good act of someone. That's so cool. And getting rewarded for that is, it's fun to watch. Right, it's, and again, you and I, you know, we Saps. Send each other videos like, I already saw that one, you know. Give me something to work with here. Yeah. Alright, so, if you, uh, are interested, if you have a high school aged person In your life. Junior high or high school? Junior high or high school. It's gonna be March 30th, unfortunately, it's kind of mostly geared towards guys, but, you know, everyone is welcome, all are welcome here, March 30th from 10 until noon at the Masonic Heritage Center. We've got a big auditorium. And this one is a test run, and what we're looking for is feedback. What did they like? What didn't they like? What should we have more of? What should we have less of? I think that there's some great stuff to be learned in there, but we want this to appeal to young people. Not just to us old guys that, you know, the way it used to be. Yeah, damn it. You kids gotta be good. Damn you kids. So, anyway. And if you have any suggestions, you can reach out to, uh, one of your friends here on Facebook. Friends. Or you can, uh, reach out to me on LinkedIn or Steve on LinkedIn and just, uh, One of the suggestions that I got was, we should encourage young men to not wear hats indoors. And my response was, well, why is that? just because. Yeah. that is old school. This is how I look at it. You never know who's watching, right? Yeah. And to a, a very small percentage of people, if you take your hat off when you go indoors and the person that is, like, gonna hire you or somebody that you're trying to impress. Sees you do that, that could be the biggest difference maker. It's like the That's true. It's like the girl opening the lock for the guy in the uh, in the Bronx Tale. Yeah. Those little things are in, are triggering in a good way for people. It's telling of your character. It really is. Yeah. And again, it might not apply to 95 percent of the population, but for that 5 percent, Joe Suchere, we talk about Suchere. Yeah. He gets mad when people wear their hats indoors. Remember Bum Phillips, the football coach for the Houston Oilers back in the day? So, he always wore a cowboy hat unless they were playing indoors. He never wore a hat when he was playing indoors, when the team was playing indoors, like in a dome. Yeah, there's some I just think it's cool. Yeah. And if people don't like it, they can go piss up a rope. And with that, off we go.