Moments to Ponder
Pondering is a lost practice today.
The idea that we might actually take a few moments to think deeply about anything seems indulgent in our busy, full schedules. Yet, our souls crave rest and space to breathe, process our lives, choices, and walk with Jesus. I invite you to join me fora few moments to take in Scripture and take away a few thoughts to ponder throughout your day.
Moments to Ponder
Episode 9: When Love Rewrites the Rules (Colossians 3:18-4:1)
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Welcome to Episode 9 with a look into Colossians 3:18-4:1.
From ruling to relationships.
From control to conversations.
From fear to love.
I encourage you to get comfy, breathe, and spend a couple minutes in quiet before we begin. Afterwards, take a few moments to ponder.
0:06 Welcome And Purpose
0:29 The Road With No Rules
2:34 Freedom Through Boundaries
2:56 Paul’s New “Road Rules”
3:28 First‑Century Household Context
4:50 Mutual Love In Marriage
6:29 Rethinking “Submit” And Agape
7:24 Children, Parents, And Kind Authority
9:13 Countercultural Choices At Home
10:18 Integrity At Work And Service
12:20 Masters, Justice, And Equality
12:55 The Clothes Of Love And Character
14:13 Hard Cases And Wise Discernment
14:51 Awe, Wonder, And A Blessing
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Hi friends, I'm Betsy, and I want to welcome you to Moments to Ponder. This podcast is designed to help you spend a few moments in God's Word and take away something to ponder. I pray that you are encouraged and find some insight in our time together today. This is episode 9. Imagine this with me. Your state has declared that there will no longer be any rules on the road. You have complete freedom to choose to drive wherever, however, at any age, speed, or direction that you like. 80 on a side street? No problem. No seatbelt? Your choice. Don't feel like driving? Your 10-year-old can step in. You get the picture. Well imagine then one day two guys happen to turn their cars down the same road at the same time, one going north, the other going south. They end up facing each other, and because one has chosen to drive on the left side of the road, while the other chose to drive on the right, they crash in a head-on accident. Now let's assume they're not hurt, but they are angry and frustrated. What happens? Their conversation might be like this. Why are you driving on this side of the road? Why can't I? Well, people always drive on this side of the road. It's not a law. I can do what I want. When the police arrive, can they do anything? Not really, because each driver can do whatever they want. There's freedom to choose. One's choice caused the accident with the other, and now both have damage to pay for. We can see that the freedom of one driver led to the lack of freedom for another. And as observers, we can probably all agree that we need some kind of rules for the road, some ground rules, so to speak, so that we can drive without chaos, accidents, and death. Freedom to choose sounds so nice, but a road with rules is actually more freeing if you think about it. Yeah, there's still some choices, but which side of the road, speed limits, stop signs, and lights, they help keep accidents and chaos at bay. Rules create a way for everyone to be free to get to where they want to go while also living within the boundaries of how to get there. Where am I going with this? As we move into the verses for today, Paul has some new road rules for these new believers, some new ways they need to go. As followers of Jesus, he wants to help them get to where they want to go, which is to be more like Jesus. But to do so, they have some new boundaries to help them stay on track as they get there. Paul is going to speak into their lives, their families, their marriages, their work. Their lives in Christ require some new choices in each of these areas. And much like speed limits and stop signs, these rules will actually bring them freedom if they're willing to live within the boundaries. Now, this is an important part of Paul's letter because he knows he's asking them to live differently where the rubber meets the road, and it's going to be different than the people around them. To understand the gravity of what Paul writes, we need to have a little first-century cultural lesson. In a Roman household, it was ruled by the man of the house. Marriages were arranged, women were subjects, and children were often seen and not heard. It was fully patriarchal, which meant the man of the house literally had the power of life and death over his wife, kids, household servants, and slaves. He set the belief system for all who lived under his rule, and everyone was expected to live that way. His word was law, and much of life was lived in fear of what he might do. Earlier in his letter, Paul wrote about relationships in society and the breaking of the social and economic boundaries. He said there's no ethnicity, no economic differences, everyone can come to Jesus. That alone would have been controversial, but now he's going to meddle in their homes. He will speak into the relationships that form their lives, their family, both spouses and children, and the people that they worked with or for. Underneath it all, he's calling them to love each other on a level that they are not familiar with, and he knows this will be hard. We begin in chapter 3 of verse 18. Let every wife be supportive and tenderly devoted to her husband, for this is a beautiful illustration of our devotion to Christ. Let every husband be filled with cherishing love for his wife and never be insensitive toward her. Okay, this is a big deal, even though today it might not seem to be. Paul is teaching them that their relationship should reflect their relationship with Jesus. So for a wife to choose to be devoted and supportive of her husband would have been a whole new idea, which reflects the humility of Jesus. In most cases, a wife wouldn't have chosen her husband. So to choose to support and be devoted to him might have been a new thought. And for a husband to cherish his wife and listen to her, it would have been like, what's love got to do with it? Paul is telling them, you are partners. Her words matter because she matters. And this reflects the value that Jesus places on everyone, along with the characteristics of gentleness and kindness. Imagine how different a Roman home would be if the man of the house cherished his wife and walked as a partner with her as she chose to support and love her husband. Paul is comparing a husband and wife's relationship to our relationship with Jesus. We choose to love him. He cherishes us. It's a beautiful thing, yet so often these verses get sidetracked by a word found in many translations. The word is submit. Many translations use this word when speaking of the wife's role, and that has been misused over and over. The word submit, hippitaso, in the Greek, actually means to yield to another, to voluntarily cooperate. Paul is asking wives to voluntarily choose their husbands, while in turn holding husbands accountable to love like Jesus. The word he used here is agapo, which is a form of agape, and it means to love dearly. Basically, Paul is saying, you need to love one another. As a Christ follower, Jesus is the head of our home. He sets the belief system, and Jesus says, love one another, be patient and kind, protect and trust. These words of Paul aren't a voice against women or a pass to men. It's a call to mutual love, which would have been very countercultural in the transactional marriage world of their day. And with these boundaries in place to love and cherish each other, the couple was freed from abuse, divorce, fear. Verse 20. Paul goes on to say, let the children respect and pay attention to their parents in everything, for this pleases our Lord Jesus. And fathers, don't have unrealistic expectations for your children, or else they may become discouraged. Now I'm sure Paul had some people in mind here as he wrote this. But for us, think about it. Parents that are wearing the robes of gentleness, kindness, mercy, and compassion would naturally be called to show their children the same thing. Today, parents are the number one influence in the lives of their kids, and I'm sure it was the same then. And what better influence than parents who love and live like Jesus? A household would go from ruling to relationships, from control to conversations, from fear to love. Can you even imagine how different that home would be for those children? It would have been radical then. And for some, I know this would be radical today. Countercultural is hard. Even today, a family that chooses to push against culture by, say, not allowing smartphones until they're 16 or limiting what their kids are allowed to be involved in. It's seen so differently, and we don't like to be different. The area of expectations is hard. And I'm sure we can all think of parents who are really hard on their kids or kids that disrespect their parents. I know there are wives who don't support their husbands and husbands that don't cherish their wives. But Paul is saying, as followers of Jesus, we are called to something different. We are made new in him, and we need to live like that even in our homes. Paul isn't judging them, he's calling them forward into something new, to love in such a way that it impacts our relationships in our lives and helps others see Jesus in us. Verse 22, he goes on: let every employee listen well and follow the instructions of their employer, not just when their employers are watching and not in pretense, but faithful in all things. For we are to live our lives with pure hearts in the constant awe and wonder of our Lord God. Put your heart and soul into every activity you do, as though you are doing it for the Lord Himself and not merely for others. How we live with the people in our lives matters. And how we work matters too. Putting our hearts and souls into what we do, no matter if people are watching or not, being faithful in all things, this is integrity. And it matters because we are his reflection in this world. Cultural pressure is hard, but your integrity and character, they're the testament of who you are in Jesus. In verse 11 of chapter 2, Paul had told the church that Christ is for everyone no matter their station. Thus he includes this piece on slaves and servants. Now, the Passion Translation that I just read uses the word employee, but in the Greek it's slave or servant. Slavery of that time was a mix of war captives, the poor, criminals, debtors, and those born into slavery. Paul couldn't just say, every slave should be free. As nice as that sounds, and as wonderful, it would have been impossible in that world at that time. So Paul speaks in guidance. He calls Christ following slaves to live for Jesus in spite of their circumstances. He tells them to do their work as if for Jesus himself and to have integrity in the process. I can't even imagine how hard that would be. It's hard to do that today, and we're not slaves. But then Paul went on to give them some hope. He says, For we know that we will receive a reward, an inheritance from the Lord, as we serve the Lord Yahweh, the anointed one. A disciple will be repaid for what he has learned and followed, for God pays no attention to the titles or prestige of men. The hope of inheritance, the wonder of serving because of who Jesus is. God looks at the heart. Now, as with marriage, as Paul spoke to both husband and wife, he goes on to speak to the masters and owners as he spoke to slaves. So if a master was a Christ follower, God had standards. Chapter 4, verse 1. Employers, treat your workers with equality and justice, as you know that you also have a Lord and Master in heaven who is watching you. These are new road rules. Love one another. Masters, be just and kind, and see those you have in your household as people, as equals in the Lord. They have value. Love them. Love your wife. Love your husband. Love your kids. Love your parents. Love those you serve. Love those you lead. This kind of love isn't normal. It isn't easy or simple or whatever. And it isn't always what we would choose. But it is how Jesus calls us to live. And to love in this way does have boundaries. We need to do what's right, which gets back to the list earlier in the chapter. We need to put on compassion, humility, kindness, gentleness, patience, forgiving each other. If we really lived into this type of love, it would naturally affect our relationships. It would naturally change our character and it would permeate our home and our workplaces. Or how when it comes to these guidelines for Paul? I mean, what if my spouse is abusive or addicted? What if my parents are super controlling? What if my boss is unfair? What if my employee is a mess? It's in these times that we need to ask for discernment and courage, put on our robes of compassion, but also just and do what we need to do. Loving one another does not make us a doormat. Jesus was no pushover, but he loved. Dear one. In the middle of these verses, Paul makes a statement. For we are to live our lives with pure hearts in the constant awe and wonder of our Lord God. I'm sure I haven't attained this level of living, but what an incredible thought to ponder. When we keep in mind how much He gave for us, how much we are loved, and focus our hearts on the wonder of God, it changes us. It changes how we live. May your day be filled with wonder at how loved you are by the God of the universe. May you be filled with awe at his deep desire for you. And may you seize the opportunities to cherish and love well those that God has placed in your life. Amen.