Cancel Culture Podcast
The Cancel Culture Podcast, the pop culture podcast which discusses and reads out the funny stories you send in. This could be funny moments during sex, your dislikes in a women/man or just funny scenario's which has happened to you. We also discuss trending topics, current world new & social media news, sports news , relationship problems & other trending topics. We are a weekly running podcast with a new episode every Monday
Cancel Culture Podcast
Modern Women still want to be courted
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What if the rules of dating and relationships in 2024 are completely different from what we've been taught? Join us on the Cancer Culture Podcast as we challenge traditional views and explore the new landscape of gender dynamics with our remarkable guests, Sabrina Dubois, a makeup artist and influencer, and Robin, CEO of Incognito Network. Together with Junior Lovu, a private healthcare professional and event manager, we humorously dissect the power play between genders in today's relationships and question if women truly hold the reins in the realm of romance.
As our conversation unfolds, we tackle the changing norms of courtship amid the rise of social media platforms like TikTok and Instagram. With an endless buffet of potential partners just a swipe away, we discuss the impact of having too many choices and how this shift has altered perceptions of masculinity and femininity. From the authenticity of modern dating to the evolving expectations placed on both men and women, we share anecdotes and insights that paint a vivid picture of how traditional roles are being challenged in today's world.
Diving deeper, we confront the superficial nature of contemporary relationships, where income and social media clout often overshadow character and substance. We explore the financial landscape shaped by societal norms, discussing how platforms like OnlyFans have redefined feminine financial independence. Through candid reflections, we emphasize the importance of mutual understanding, trust, and clear communication in fostering genuine connections and meaningful partnerships. Engage with us in this thought-provoking episode as we invite you to reconsider your perspectives on gender roles and relationship dynamics.
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Controversial Views on Relationships and Gender
Speaker 1I'm so sorry to my only fan girls, but there's some people that they're only good at that, because if you take away the male pound from any porn industry crashes straight away.
Speaker 2Take away the female pound. It will continue when women are in their feminine energy. They are the actual, the best support mechanism. I personally think that women shouldn't actually work.
Speaker 4Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 2Book club culture is because of ladies. We can't sleep with you. If you don't let us, you hold the key. No, no, no, no you hold the key.
Speaker 1You guys manipulate us. This skin, this flesh is weak. I am weak. If you touch me, I say to the woman stay celibate and if you want, if you feel horny, touch yourself.
Speaker 3Listen to what you're saying. Listen to what you're saying what?
Speaker 1am I saying Listen to what you're saying. What am I saying? Accusations.
Speaker 3If you are not the one that controls the sex, you are telling him that you're a celibate.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 3Because you're trying to control the sex.
Speaker 2No, no no, no, no, no. He has to stand back. He's got you. He's got you. Welcome back to the Cancer Culture Podcast, where we talk about money, relationship, culture and everything trending. It's Mr Anson here and BK to my left. Boy Back again, man Back again.
Speaker 2You know what yeah what I will say is you had a good show last week, man, it was a good show. Yeah, you know what I mean. I wanted to jump into the screen, but it was a very good show. Man, I feel like I'm rubbing off on you. I feel like I am Defo Key.
Speaker 5Yeah, shout out, key. He flew the flag for you last week. Yeah, man, we was a bit like you know, a bit absent when you were here and I did want to caution you about the mess that I did see when I came in here. I know I'm sorry. Make sure it don't happen again. It is what it is the first time.
Speaker 2Make sure you subscribe to the channel because we're on the road to 10,000 subscribers. Press that subscribe button, turn it on. Subscribe to subscribe, to turn it on subscribe to 11 people and we've got some lovely guests today courtesy of our new recruiter, robin. Shout out, robin, getting in the people, them every single week. We love that. We love it. Some new, new faces, and I think this is what is this two weeks in a row, not only fans, girls. That's crazy.
Speaker 5Yeah, we actually maybe we needed some new life yeah we did some new recruitment for you guys and girls that say oh they only do, only fans.
Speaker 2Well, we don't do we? Yeah well we'll introduce them anyway, so we've got first um. Have you been on the show before?
Speaker 4yeah, you haven't thought so it's been a while back, but yeah okay.
Speaker 2Well, anyway, introduce yourself. You don't know Name, age, what you do for work and relationship status.
Speaker 4My name is Sabrina Dubois. I'm now 32. I'm a makeup artist, host, model and lifestyle influencer or content creator.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 4And single.
Speaker 2Single Okay.
Speaker 4Why do you think?
Speaker 5It's only fair.
Speaker 2She belongs to the street Right, okay, so questions any relation to Daniel Dubois?
Speaker 4No, you asked me this last time I did, I know, but it's you know. No, I could claim it, though.
Speaker 2I'd use it. Use it for your thing. You say it's like my long-lost cousin. Are you cousins? Uh-huh, I'd use it like. Use it for your thing. You say he's like my long-lost cousin. Are you cousins? Aj, aj, do what? Do what? Oh, you don't know about sex fair enough.
Speaker 5Yeah, you definitely can't use it. It's her left hand. She likes the work?
Speaker 2yeah, all right and next, obviously third time on the show yeah, I can't keep myself away.
Speaker 6As you know, I Robin, I'm 20. I was going to knock some years off my age, but I'm 27. And I recruit for you guys and I'm the CEO of Incognito Network. So if you like influencing, check it out.
Speaker 2Make sure you do as well. Relationship status.
Speaker 6The curse. Nah, let's not talk about that, let's keep it moving. Wait, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 5Yes, wait a minute. Yes, wait a minute. Yes, wait a minute.
Speaker 2Yes.
Speaker 6No, wait a minute. Yes, okay, we're going to keep it moving.
Speaker 2We're going to keep it moving, but listen BK, listen the curse.
Speaker 5There is, you didn't push the button. Push the button. Nah, she's. No, she belongs to the streets. It's only fair. It's only fair.
Speaker 2One foot in, alright, fair enough. But listen, remember I told man About the curse that's what I'm saying Moving on to the next person First time on the show. Your name is what do you do for a living Relationship status, please?
Speaker 3My name is Junior Lovu. I work in the private Healthcare sector. I'll keep it there. Brief. I own an events company Called Next Level Promotions. We have an event called Anoche. We have a New Year's party, so feel free to join that. It's a really good event when is it Pulling? Up. She pulls up In home, yeah, in home. Okay, trust me, it's not what you guys think, it's lit.
Speaker 5Alright, I only thought it was lit. But I, what are you lying for?
Speaker 3I'm joking. I have to look at you like hey.
Speaker 2Yeah, I made this whole. Come and try it out.
Speaker 3You won't be pressing that button If I'm here in the country.
Speaker 2I shall come down, all right cool Fair.
Speaker 3When is it? Sorry, I'll look after both of you.
Speaker 2Very good VIP yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3Relationship status. Relationship status Single Single.
Speaker 5You know you're going to be there. All right, sorry, backstage Can he belong to the streets.
Speaker 4Yeah, why doesn't he get a button yeah?
Speaker 3Nah, listen, listen, listen, listen.
Speaker 2You know what? You know what? Because I believe in equality, yeah. She belongs to the streets, because I actually do believe in equality.
Speaker 5That statement said she belongs to the streets. I know, but you're not kidding she belongs to the streets.
Speaker 2You got to improvise.
Speaker 5Isn't he a streets man? No, no, no, he is. That's what I mean, that's what I mean Anyways, and the last yeah, I'm in Last one on the end.
Speaker 2Because technically we paved the streets. That makes sense. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, I mean a lot of them will disagree, but yeah, okay, and on the end, last but not least, hi guys, I'm Rose.
Speaker 1You can find me on Instagram. Talula Victoria. Shout out to myself. Yeah, I specialize in client customer communication via telephone, that's a tongue twister to say I know yeah. I like to keep it classy always, okay, yeah, lifestyle, micro lifestyle influencer.
Speaker 6Okay.
Speaker 1Model as well, and I'm single, but by choice, not ready to mingle, okay.
Speaker 6That's a good answer.
Speaker 2What are you lying for? No one's ever. Single by choice.
Speaker 1I told you, so I debunk this all the time we're here.
Speaker 2Do you know why? Do you know why we're here? Do you know why? Do you know why? Let me let me, ask you me, this is fucking when I say, when I hear that, right the argument I make. So, okay, you know what? What your favorite celebrity? Who is that?
Speaker 3do you have a favorite celebrity? Are you?
Speaker 2are you straight.
Speaker 1Yeah, you're so you like men favorite celebrity, my favorite celebrity um rihanna a male, like someone that you like.
Speaker 2Oh, I fancy him shout out to rama shout out rama yeah, all right, so let's, let's picture this. Then we're going to scenario. So rama dms you, yeah that rama wants to take you out. You'll be trying to wine and dine. You go out, few free dates. Free dates is like your listen roles, listen.
Speaker 5Here's the roles and I want you to be my girl yeah, I want you to be my girl.
Speaker 2And look, 12 months we're getting married. What you gonna say? No? He's lying he's not lying, he's telling the truth. You done a lie detector. He's telling the truth, is it yeah?
Speaker 1don't deal with artists either way.
Speaker 3So you wouldn't date him, no, and you wouldn't get married to him, no, no, I believe it's a good choice, though, thank you what are?
Speaker 2you lying, for I don't believe her at all man.
Speaker 5Do you see her Mate she?
Speaker 1kissed the camera when we mentioned him. Yeah, I love him, though, as an artist.
Speaker 2Would you let him hit then? No, no. So easy girl but you turn him down when he wants to be with you, and you won't let him too. Men like what they can't get oh, that's crazy, that is actually crazy, that's crazy you know what?
Speaker 3you know what we can't. We can't say that's crazy, you know we have only friends for a reason.
Speaker 5Do you know what?
Speaker 2listen. But the thing is right. Right and I I hear your point, but I, I people on to the contrary say you know a lot of the people that can get women go on there. I don't know how true that is, but I believe if you're getting women in real life, you're unlikely to be on OnlyFans. You understand what I mean. So it's the guys that can't get women that were more inclined to be on there. I'm not saying all, but I'm saying most.
Speaker 3But. But I still think that the intangibleness of that is the reason why guys are like that. And if the majority of those guys are doing that and showing the stats, then Well, I don't get it.
Speaker 2No, because the majority of guys are struggling to get women. That's why they're on there.
Speaker 3But then I understand that, but. I'm just saying, if people can't get something or acquire something, they're going to go out their way to try and get it.
Speaker 2No, no, no, but, no, no, no, but her argument. It's more desirable no but her argument is guys want what they can't get. No, no, because if they had a choice between a woman they can't get and a woman they can get, which one they're picking?
Speaker 6They'll pick the one they can get, but they'll still go after the one they want.
Speaker 2But that's a complete different topic. Men like variety, which we know, but I'm saying if pay and watch on TV, which one to pick in Word? All right, then Catch it, bitch, I'm too much man. I'm just, I'm just like yo.
Speaker 4Smashing is one thing and then actually being with him, because I feel like the question was asking like would you marry him and all this stuff.
Speaker 5No, but then he did ask afterwards would she let him hit? I asked both questions.
Speaker 2I personally think both can't be true. But you know what? Fair enough, because, remember, you're saying you won't let him hit because you think set you easy, but then you won't let him marry you either.
Speaker 1I don't believe in marriage in 2024, you don't? No, that's fair. Fair I do fair fair, let's move on.
Deconstructing Modern Dating Norms
Speaker 2I'm going to move on because you've got a question right. You said that we're destroying off-camera. She claimed the Countess Courtish podcast is destroying society. I'd like to know why she came for us.
Speaker 4Yeah, I know it's mad.
Speaker 2Accusations it's mad.
Speaker 4It's crazy, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 6But let's hear what you guys say. So you guys, I've watched the podcast. Men shouldn't chase women. But that's what's wrong with society. Men want to be chased. That's not very manly, is it? We're now creating a society of, like very feminine men, like back in the days when men used to like really get up and go out and you know, like get what they wanted. Nah, they just want their hands holding and being told they're beautiful and of course, we can do that but that's why I've got masculine women.
Speaker 6That's why I've got masculine women now Like that's a problem.
Speaker 2This is my rebuttal to that. So I understand your point. I do get that, but you know what the difference is between back then and 2024? Back then, right, if you chased a woman and courted a woman Courted this of the time she likes you, fast forward to 2024. This is 2024. Let's go into a dream. We're in 2024 now. We're in the future, yo, now I see a lot of TikToks, a lot of Instagram stories, women saying you know, oh, yeah, you go and get that free meal, go get it for your food, yeah, so you'll be taking them out. So we're not rewarded for chasing anymore, do you not think that's satire, though?
Speaker 6do you not think you're looking too much into it, because I feel like, do you?
Speaker 3not think wait, wait, what do you mean?
Speaker 2looking too much, no, sorry, just before you go, I'm going to ask one question. Hold your thought, yeah, because I'm coming to you straight after one question and everyone watching who's been on a date with a guy you didn't really like and got free food?
Speaker 4I did, I have, but not for that reason exactly I've sat with them.
Speaker 2So, no, no, wait, remember again, yeah the question was you went on a date with a guy you don't like yeah, right so he's chasing you.
Speaker 4He's doing what you like but that's the whole point of the courtship. If somebody asks me to get to know me, so you've invited me out for a date, we're having dinner. If by the end of that I'm like, ew, I don't like you no, no, before you go on.
Speaker 2So you didn't like him, so you mean physically, yeah, yeah. No, I wouldn't have gone on a date with somebody I do not like, if you didn't like. No, no, no, no. The feminist has been on a date. No, no, no, I'm not a feminist.
Speaker 1I am a feminist, but I'm not a feminist.
Speaker 2All right, fair enough.
Speaker 1What a liar, bro.
Speaker 2Sorry, what was you going to say, bro? I said I'll come straight to you.
Speaker 3No, I don't think it's a satire thing, man, because we live in a society now where everybody's got options.
Speaker 5Too many options.
Speaker 3That's all it is. Guy and the amount of guys that are trying to get girls. You might have 10 guys dm you. You just pick one and say I'm gonna go on a date with this person, I'm gonna give him interest because he's got money. He looks like he's got money. So for me, if you're asking people to chase in that type of environment there's and a man who's high value. He's not going to chase nobody. Yo, let's get more guys on, he's not gonna chase nobody. Could you imagine someone who high value the same way that you sit there and scroll and tick on whichever guy you want to pick? We have the vice versa of someone that's got a good style, got a good job. You have loads of girls that DM you. Why pick the girl that shows you 50-50 interest that's giving you that she's not interested in you.
Speaker 5She's not engaged.
Speaker 1But that's what you guys are like, though.
Speaker 3No, but you're talking about guys, not kids.
Speaker 1How many friends of yours want to be with you, but you don't want to be with them friends.
Speaker 3I mean women friends you guys have friends on them, though no, no, men, don't, men don't friends on but we're not going to take. We're not and take you on a date. I need to distinguish as well, especially to yourself.
Speaker 4I understand, men don't friendzone, we fuckzone.
Speaker 2We don't friendzone? Well, I don't agree, I disagree with that.
Speaker 6I don't agree, maybe not everyone.
Speaker 2But I'm just saying you say, even if you're going to say you're going to put someone in a friendzone if you had the opportunity they probably would sleep with the person.
Speaker 3Nah, do you know what I'm not gonna agree? But that's, that's you. Yeah, but men in general in general.
Speaker 2I'm always speaking in general, so maybe you can't and cool. Most men give an opportunity for their friends.
Speaker 3They'll take the chance right we've proven they won't take you seriously. I don't. I don't think I don't think that should always be looked at as a bad thing. I think why? Because I feel, like every relationship that you have with everybody, there's something that you admire about them. Like you might meet a guy and a guy friend Like another guy's got more money or something like that, and you think yo do you know what? I want to get to know that guy a little bit more. Or that girl's good looking You'd be like she doesn't feel the same way. There's always that, there's always that. Can I ask a question.
Speaker 2I think in my eyes I understand your point. I do understand your point. I'm going to get back to the Chaser thing in a minute because I've got another point about that as well. Yeah, so I'm glad you brought up the man thing. Like he's got more money than you, he's more successful than you. Would like to know what you get out of like being a friend, friend with, like a woman, as a man, because she'll get a lot to be honest with you because I was raised by women, so there's a different element to you know what you can get that from your girl?
Speaker 6hold on, hold on, hold on for a second.
Speaker 5I was raised by women, so there's little elements.
Speaker 3There's women that are in my life, that are my friends and and there's sometimes when I'm going through certain points that we're not taught to speak about certain topics. When I talk to my boys about certain topics that I'm struggling with, it's more of a come on, bro, like it's cool, like when I speak to a woman she'd be like there's some people that I've called when I'm about to quit something. She's asked me where does that emotion come from? Read this let me pray for you that that type of structure of conversation is a whole different structure. Yeah, peace, where there's some people that I have dated and I felt like I wasn't growing that relationship.
Speaker 5And I was making her grow.
Speaker 3But when you're saying that, I get that, because we used to say this as friends. Sometimes we go out with our friends and our girls. Why do I have to end up paying for most of the night, exactly?
Speaker 4Why am I looking after everybody?
Speaker 3Nobody. I'm like it's weird because we all know that we're in a friendship, so I'm like you need to take out money from your pocket. You've asked me to come out Because you're the man.
Speaker 5It doesn't make sense, but that's the thing. Male friends to a female is a man who is basically their hobby, without the benefits.
Speaker 1Yeah, no, I agree, and the thing is, it's a shoulder to frown, but without the sex.
Speaker 5Basically, that's what you would classify. It's a friend zone, but you, you expect them to do all the things that you would expect your own man to do.
Speaker 1No, no, no that's the problem that you men have like okay so you guys will be. Most of the time, guys go for girls with looks, and I'm not gonna lie the girls who have who are good looking, are mostly the ones who are trash. So the girls who are average, as in the sevens on tens, the six on tens, these are the girls who either get friend zones, they get fucked over, so their body counts high, and then you guys are going to complain that women are all trash when that's not our fault.
Speaker 5You know what the problem is. But them sevens and them eights are looking for nines and then tenses, and when they don't get them, nines or them tenses because, their nines and them nines and them tenses are in their own pool y'all get upset now and expect us now, the average guy, to pick up the mess people who's a three thinks they should deserve an eight just because and that's not fair no, just because an eight DM'd them, just because they wanted to smash now they think that everyone else that needs to be up there yeah, I might.
Speaker 3I understand, but then that comes that comes from. This comes from both sides. I'll make it. I'll make it.
Speaker 2I'll make it. I'll make it easy for the lady, like a bit it's game for how you know what your league is. This is how you know it's not the man that you can sleep with. It's the man you can get to commit to you to keep. If he ain't going to commit to you, he's not in your league. Now there is, sometimes there's some. Maybe you think you're better than him and maybe you are better than him, but he didn't want to commit to you. That does happen sometimes.
Speaker 1But for the most level he will commit to you. So just because the 10 wants to sleep with you, don't mean he wants to commit with you.
Speaker 2He probably wants to commit with an eight yeah, that's why I'm single. Yeah, exactly I struggle these days.
Speaker 1Why would you rate yourself out of 10 me? Yeah, I'm gonna say I'm a 10 out of 10, that's it that's the problem, because no one's perfect.
Speaker 2Even if you said nine I would, I would accept what I mean, but the thing is like.
Speaker 1The difference between me and many other people is that I love myself. So if you don't want to accept me as 10 over 10, it's fine.
Speaker 2There's always going to be prettier than me anyways I understand and I'm not putting you down by saying it's not personal. Honestly, I'm not saying you know, I'm not putting you down.
Speaker 4You are, but I'm not I'm not.
Speaker 2Honestly, I'm not. I've literally said this to everybody. Like it doesn't, I don't, I don't think tens exist, because no one's perfect. No, you could argue nine.
Speaker 1Ten doesn't mean you're perfect. It does what's better. What's better than 10? 11?
Speaker 2but it's 10 out of 10 the scale is 10.
Speaker 1It's true. I understand that, but still I will say I'm a 10 out of 10 that's fine, your confidence can be.
Speaker 2But I'm saying like this is what I saying why life can't really be ran off feelings? Because if I have a car, yeah, and I feel like this car is worth a million pounds, when I go to sell it, no one's buying it for a million pounds. So reality tells you that you're not. I mean, reality says that the car is not worth a million. The market, the market nine, picks you up. Who's a 10 man? Okay, I don't know. 10, sorry. And if a nine out of 10 guy to society wives you, then maybe you can say that, because the market dictates if you are a 10 or a nine. I don't believe there is 10 okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 3The market, okay.
Speaker 2We're talking about self-esteem here yeah, that's a different thing, whatever you believe in is cool.
Speaker 3Yeah, self-esteem is different. What is?
Speaker 1a nine. What is the difference out of a nine out of ten or a three out of ten? What do? Beauty is relative. It's really not. It's not. What you find beautiful might not be beautiful for me there is an average.
Speaker 2Yeah, I understand I get your point and I do get what you mean. Some people might find other people attractive and that is true. I'm not disagreeing. But beauty in general. There is a beauty standard in general, as in even if it's not your type, even outside of society, even if it's not your type, you can acknowledge that someone's good looking or beautiful. You might not date them, but we know who the beautiful people are. For instance, I use Lizzo a lot. She might come for me soon If a man had a chance between Lizzo and Beyonce in her prime. Most people are going to say Beyonce is more beautiful.
Speaker 1Lizzo's getting to her prime, though.
Speaker 2I know, but that's why Let the people get into their prime first. I understand, but I'm not disputing that. I'm saying, when you look at someone, if there was two women sticking together, those two who are majority of people picking.
Speaker 3The fact that you have a scale means that it's always going to be that whether you pick it or not, but I do think now, in this day and age, because of how things are so superficial, the fact that you have to think of someone as a 3 or 10 people don't date each other for substance or who that person is you don't date people for character for character and the fact that that person makes you better.
Speaker 3I remember watching last week with my daughter and my mom watching like the movie of Obama, when he met Michelle and she said to him like I think she had said to him, like I will make you president, and it was one of those where you're like what the hell? But when you watch the movie and you watch the engagement and the way she built him as a character and told him to be on there on time, certain things like that, but me I feel like they dated each other because of the character. They challenged each other, they sharpened each other. Do you get what I mean?
Speaker 5I disagree with that, but I feel like now.
Speaker 3Sometimes we might date because of you earn a hundred thousand pounds.
Speaker 2You look great, your Instagram's got ten thousand million followers, but you but you know what the problem is with that, though and this is the thing like women, come on the show.
Speaker 4Men as well.
Speaker 6No, no, no.
Speaker 2Oh, no, no, no, no, I understand, Because you know what I'm going to say, but in general because I can only, really, for the most part I can only really speak from a men's perspective, right? So for me, the people that I see are the ladies like men. We don't want a celebrity. I'm not saying all, but I'm saying men in general. We don't care if you're a celebrity, we don't care if you've got money, we care if we've got money so we can look after you. We don't care. So we're not, we're not hypergamous Back to the chasing thing.
Speaker 2So the reason, the reason buddy, because for in 2024, you don't know what the woman's intention is, she can be using you and you can waste a lot of time. For me, my advice to men would be focus on your purpose. So, if I could, if I could act it out right, you saw me purpose purpose purpose. Oh, a pretty lady hi. She says hi back. Talk to her. She doesn't say hi back purpose, that's it.
Speaker 2That's, that's that's how, that's my advice to guys yeah, so, and for me the other thing sorry, just hold that thought the other thing is because women are more hypergamous now, I think, as in, they want to know what you're earning and you need to be tall and they want someone who's better than for the most part.
Speaker 6You've got more standards, do you mean?
Speaker 2You can say it's standards, that's fine.
Speaker 4I don't have a problem. I think hypergamous has always been around around. Yeah, I don't have a problem with that?
Speaker 2they can.
Speaker 5That's cool, it's more security, like there's nothing wrong with a woman wanting that to find that security.
Speaker 2But just to finish on the and then I'm gonna, I'm gonna go to you. Yeah, so if you're chasing her because no matter what, if someone's chasing you, subconsciously you think you're better than them, even if you don't realize you're doing it right. And the problem is with chasing a woman is that the woman has to think you're better than her, in my opinion, because of hypergamy. So if she thinks she's better than you more times she's going to leave you, because most of the time they want someone on their level or better. We don't care what. We'll date down. Women don't really. I'm not saying some women might update down in the future, but in general they want to date on their level or above. So if she thinks she's better than you more times she's going to leave you. So that's why I would say for men not to chase.
Gender Dynamics and Modern Expectations
Speaker 4So I wonder I forgot my first well said in terms of the chasing I think like, say, if you initiate a conversation or like you put yourself out there to a woman and then you get the vibe that she thinks she's better, then that's like the role to pull back, right. Right, of course, but if you're not sure in that or you want to work that out, then I think chase, I think. But it works both ways, like both sides, like men use women, women use men, like it's. I think that is like a thing overall in 2024. Like a lot of men because they have so much option.
Speaker 3You've Like a lot of men. I don't think men have options like that. Oh, that's what you think.
Speaker 4Come on Even a lot of men have worked out. You get a little champagne, you do this, you do that, like you know.
Speaker 2How do you buy champagne?
Speaker 4I was going to say Like money or whatever, just put on a show for a minute.
Speaker 2Is it easy to get money?
Speaker 4Is it easy to get money?
Speaker 6I mean like we're in 2020 Money's in the air I'm going
Speaker 3to.
Speaker 5I'm going to Are you guys for real, only women Listen. You know why.
Speaker 2Sorry, I deep this During the show. Let me tell you why. I'm sure you three Earn enough money, right. And I went and as I was going through, like what you do for a living, it just all sounded Like Chinese to me Because as a man I don't even know If I could even Do any of those things like we normally have to do. I'm not saying that it's impossible, but I'm saying like. I'm saying there's power in being a very, very good looking woman, or just not even an average woman.
Speaker 6I mean, last time I came here you asked me to rate myself and I was like a six but even an average woman.
Speaker 2I'm saying there's certain jobs that you lot can do and we cannot do them never but I mean okay with me being a makeup artist.
Speaker 4Some of the best makeup artists in the world are men. They trap the women.
Speaker 2But are they straight?
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 2They are straight.
Speaker 4Yes, they're straight.
Speaker 2I mean that is true, like we are better at most things, then and I think definitely in my field, it's because you didn't slide that in there, didn't you I? Was looking at her.
Speaker 3You looked at her as well.
Speaker 2You were like Because I was looking. Yeah, I was like, I was literally Googling. I was trying to find like something that at the top tier of whatever it is where a woman's there, and I was struggling.
Speaker 3I was genuinely struggling.
Speaker 4Do you mean like in any kind of field, any field, even in OnlyFans, even OnlyFans?
Speaker 3They don Even OnlyFans. They don't do it, but they manage and make the most money. It's crazy. No guys, honestly, do you know? I was reading this book called the Boy Crisis. It's an amazing book, though. It's about being a dad and dads being best present. But the society now, in terms of stats, women earn more than men, ridiculously. They actually do, yeah, they earn more than men and men's opportunities in industries are diminishing because there's more programs to promote women.
Speaker 3Yes, Meaning that men now, most of the time they do not earn nothing compared to their partners. That is true On a high, honest and now, because we still have the society of he should pay for everything type of thing. Sometimes your girl could earn twice your wage and you give all your wage towards taking out and trying to impress her, trying to be a man. And more men are in debt now, yeah, of course More men are in debt trying to do their life.
Speaker 2The only thing that I would say they won't dominate in, or they generally don't, it's probably because they don't go for it. It's like infrastructure jobs yeah, brick layers when you, and earn 10 times what the bricklayer's making. We can't catch up, because we can't do that. Like these jobs that you can get as women, like you're very privileged in 2024. I don't know.
Speaker 3That's what I mean, the feminism thing, that's dead now because you lot are doing better than us.
Speaker 2Women 100%.
Speaker 6You're doing a lot better than us. You mentioned that a girl can earn 20.
Speaker 2But how are we going to make money from people? Unless we're gay wait wait, wait, wait, wait sorry, let her go because she some of the women men have featured a lot of it is with a woman counterpart, so we're still not going to make as much more, and the reason I know that is because if you take away the male pound from any porn industry crashes straight away. Take away the female pound, it can continue. So that's the evidence that it's definitely dominated by men paying.
Speaker 3My thing is why does it have to result in being OnlyFans?
Speaker 4Why is that? The first thing? There's crypto. There's all sorts of different ways.
Speaker 1I understand that, but then again, you need to understand that there's some people that I'm so sorry to my OnlyFan girls, but there's some people that I'm so sorry to my only fan girls, but there's some people that they're only good at that. They say look at what you're good at.
Speaker 3Look at what you're good at and do it.
Speaker 2For me that's not a skill, I do because because that's your opinion though, because a lot of these, a lot of the people, are the only fans, right? If there was a male, they'd be in poverty yeah.
Speaker 1Why should she send a free nude to a guy who just wants to fuck her when she can get money out of her?
Speaker 2You know what, though? Yeah, oh, my God, I'm not yet I'm going to play devil's advocate, though a little bit on it Because I do after interviewing so many, I kind of get it. So it a lot of guys I think. I don't think it's right, but I think a lot of guys. I think and I've always made this comparison, the male comparison to OnlyFans would be selling drugs it's very easy, you don't? Need no talent to do it.
Speaker 2You can just go and buy and then you're in basically it's slightly harder because you need capital to do it, but it's the equivalent right. But at the time you need to have that yo it's. Is it morally correct?
Speaker 1or and other things as well. So what do you understand by morally?
Speaker 2everyone can define what's moral to them I think we have a moral I think, everybody I think every, I think everybody, there's a line yeah I'm gonna come back to you, so I let him go and then I'll challenge why I think there is no, I just I still think that everybody knows what's right and what's wrong and what i't think so.
Speaker 3This is a sick world we live in All right, it's a capitalist world, so if it's going to sell, then we'll push it.
Speaker 2No, but that means they're just going against their morals. They know it's wrong.
Speaker 3They know they're going against their morals If it's going to sell right now.
Speaker 2people do things for money more than anything. And someone was and there was like 10 people and someone's telling the 10 people to push this kid off the cliff. I'm not saying no one would do it, but I'm saying they will all know it's not the right thing to do. Do you understand what I'm saying? I'll give you an example click, sell, right?
Speaker 3people love attention. Now it's all about attention now, right? If a topic is hot, everyone's talking about it. So if it sells, they'll talk about it.
Speaker 3Whether it's negative or positive, as long as they're getting money and it can put food on the table, it's going to be talked about yeah the thing is for each person and I always say this to everybody right, if you don't like a society and don't want to promote that society, it's your job as an individual to hold that value and and and push it up around the people around you and then let them push it to the people around you, and that's the only way you could change the world is in your environment and choose whether what you stand for, because if you don't stand for nothing, you're going to fall for everything. So whenever you see something on news or you see a podcast, someone says something nice, you're going to believe in it. Because you don't stand for nothing, you won't question it. It you won't.
Speaker 1If someone said to you only fans is the best thing in the world, you just jump on it if someone told you that I don't know still, but I think the problem with only fan girls is that they make a decision to join only fans and they don't stick to their decision. If you take accountability of your actions, nothing should bother you. You knew your body was going to be on the internet. Why are you complaining tomorrow, saying, oh, the porn, the industry the corn yeah, the corn industry has abused me, manipulated me.
Speaker 1No, they didn't. You needed the money. You did what you had to do. Stick to it.
Speaker 2It's quite refreshing to hear that from a woman. That's why I said I can't really say I'm a feminist, but I support my girls always.
Speaker 3This is where I think the cloud thing happens.
Speaker 1I think it's when you get to the point where you are willing to do anything to try and be that person, but you don't think about the consequences and then you get there, you think this is not where I want to be because when they get in, when they get in the 10k, 15k, 100k per month, they're balling, of course, okay, yeah because it's instant gratification and in the moment it feels amazing.
Speaker 4I'm not judging, though the thing is.
Speaker 1I'm still not judging it. It's just like stick to what you like, but I guess it's the same with anything.
Speaker 4You can go and get a new job like I might, decide I want to work in McDonald's today and I think everything's amazing. And then I've gone there for a month and I'm like, oh, I hate it like I won't know. I know there's a concept, but I'm saying a lot of people and usually it's a lot like impressionable people that would join on to it, like not knowing the consequences, or if there is consequences.
Speaker 6I don't know. I mean, I feel everyone knows the consequences because it's all over social media. That's the thing. Read the Terms and conditions ladies.
Speaker 1Read the terms and conditions, ladies.
Speaker 4I mean, I think you're allowed to do something.
Speaker 2And have regrets later.
Speaker 3Last thought on this Last thoughts anyone? Guys, I don't think that people know the consequences.
Speaker 4No, no, no In the sense. Let me explain to you why it's fair enough.
Exploring the Notion of Sexiness
Speaker 3Imagine you turn on the TV. Everyone's talking about OnlyFans. In fact, they said OnlyFans earned more than the NBA league Altogether entirely Right OnlyFans, and more than the NBA league all together entirely right. You turn on the TV, you're 18 years old. You see that this girl's making a million pound show in her body.
Speaker 3All you're seeing is her glimmer and glamour, because that's what she's posting on all the things I agree and then you get in there and then you find out how people talk to you no, but listen, you're watching spit to me, you.
Speaker 6You don't see the behind the scenes. All you've got to do is read the comment section.
Speaker 3No, listen. Okay, guys, give me an example, give you guys an example P Diddy. Let's give you guys an example, p Diddy. I'm giving you guys an example Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait.
Speaker 2Where's?
Speaker 5it going.
Speaker 2What in the baby? Oh, it's going down.
Speaker 3No, I'm just saying we've watched him on everything right, We've seen his life, his glimmer, glamour and whatever. And now we hear all these stories coming. Do you guys think you would have known the behind the scenes?
Speaker 2You know, to be fair, a lot of people a lot of people were watching it.
Speaker 3When we were kids, never knew about those stories. We were always glamourised.
Speaker 2I mean sorry people sing that clip where he's dancing behind a guy looking at his head that's just blatant. I don't know how we missed it. To be honest, it's that sheep effect, isn't it?
Speaker 4like where or was it the Mandela effect? You know when, like you keep saying something like and everyone, and he's a saint and the whole world is saying it, you all, believe it and now when we're looking back in hindsight, we're like what?
Speaker 6what's that interview? When he's like women, it's a bit like saying when cheating.
Speaker 1We can only say it's cheating until you get caught. If you're not caught, it's not cheating you just don't know about it.
Speaker 4I think like even relating to that case, and maybe a younger, younger star that's growing up in the industry example, he's gone into it and a couple of other people that have been named like it was glamorized to them, like their parents had put them in that situation and again, it's one of them things until you've gone through it you're not going to know. And I mean that was like I do understand?
Speaker 2I still don't.
Speaker 3Well, I'm going to move the topic on now because I I just want to still say you don't know the consequences sometimes until you're there. I agree. I think it's the same with selling now, but I think it's the same as selling drugs.
Speaker 2You see the cards, you see the and then you go in.
Speaker 1There I am so sorry, but I think we need to stop giving excuses to people. If you want to join, if money drives you, you need to accept. If money drives you, you need to accept that money drives you and you can do what you want. And if you decide to do what you want, it's like people who change their genders and then they regret later. Why are you regretting later? Fair?
Speaker 2you know that's actually a fair point from seven years old you can make a decision.
Speaker 1You know what you're doing, you know what's good, you know what's right well, yeah.
Speaker 2So basically what I'm gonna do every week now is, um, because sometimes I have these thoughts, I have these thoughts and I'm just like yo. It kind of makes sense. And then I would like the panel to kind of like to involve themselves. Yeah to say whether my thought pattern. Yeah, so this is what I thought. I'm just going to go into it, because what I can't think is down.
Speaker 2Yeah, so I was thinking and I was thinking and say things yeah, and I was walking around and I'm saying now on the women's side, like I actually think that because there's a lot of arguments about you know, women are not sex objects and all this kind of thing right, but I actually think that a majority of women actually want to be sex objects, love it yeah, I genuinely think that's true and I'll, because I've seen what showed me.
Speaker 2I went on Instagram, right, and I've seen a few women like basically saying, yo, modesty can't be sex. And I was like I wonder what this looks like. And they're showing like different outfits and I'm like yo, they look nice. Do you know what I'm trying to say? So that just proves that you actually don't need to be half naked to still look good, right. And then I was walking around the gym. This is in the gym. I'm looking at all the men like they're just normally wearing, like normal jogging buttons, nothing's out. And you know, we're just working out and and my argument is, is that I, I personally think that men work harder in the gym. They're stronger, so they're doing more and you know, and probably sweating more. Most of the people I've seen there don't I'm not saying everybody, but most people I see go in.
Speaker 2Might take a little selfie then go on the ladies side and yeah, we just work out in normal clothes. And then I'm looking at a lot of the like literally it's like you're wearing nothing and I'm not, like I'm just. I just want to look straight Like I don't want to get accused of anything but like, literally you're not wearing anything. You're basically like nothing.
Speaker 5It's like bra and pants. Every man in the gym knows that feeling when you find your fixed spot and you just keep looking at it.
Speaker 2Clearly, you must know if people are going to look at you. Yeah, Because it's a bit strange to be honest with you. It's like people are going to look at you in that way because you're showing everything.
Speaker 1I mean, okay, I'm going to say something that might be very different Controversial, here we go. Yeah, so the thing is about me is like I love my body, right? So if I feel good in an outfit, whether you look at me, I'm going to wear it. So now people can see me dressed and they're going to be like oh, she wants all the attention in the world. No, I don't. I feel sexy in that dress and I'm going to wear it, period, period.
Speaker 2I understand your point and I've heard this quite a lot, I think one like 300 women on the show.
Speaker 3So, yeah.
Speaker 2So what I would say to that is a desert island and there was no one else around and you had a tracksuit and next to it you hung up a sexy skirt, sexy outfit, skin showing high heels and makeup. You've even got a makeup table there it's a weird island but it's there yeah which one are you gonna? Yeah, which one are you gonna? Okay, not even a desert, normal, like a stranded in an island. Which one would you pick?
Speaker 1In between, like the sexy outfit and.
Speaker 2Would you even consider the sexy outfit?
Speaker 1I will consider the weather before the outfit.
Speaker 5Yeah, Ranging weather. It's sexy outfit weather. It's sexy outfit weather.
Speaker 4Then you'd wear the sexy outfit.
Speaker 5I'll wear the sexy outfit.
Speaker 1Why not?
Speaker 2You'll buy yourself, by the way.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, I will.
Speaker 2So you're telling me.
Speaker 4You're gonna sit there and do your makeup. You can look over your lip. Oh, it's okay.
Speaker 5Let me prod the. Let me prod the. Oh my God, cool, cool.
Speaker 2Let me prod the logic a little bit more. Yeah, cause I'm assuming you want to feel sexy all the time. Right? Who doesn't want to feel sexy all the time?
Speaker 4Period All right, yeah Go queen, we know that it's all right. Yeah, go queen. It's not possible to do this all the time I feel like for you, sexy is like my arse.
Speaker 2Wearing makeup. Is that sexy? Yeah, yeah, all right. So this is my question, maybe what you feel like.
Speaker 4Sometimes I feel sexy without makeup. I understand Slay Slay, go queen, I get it.
Speaker 3I hear it.
Speaker 2So if you just wear the sexy one, I mean I do sometimes you do sexy all the time.
Speaker 1Oh, and then we hear the some some time.
Speaker 4No, the thing is, if I put makeup before, going to sleep, I'm going to like, but I do put it on routine to feel sexy. No, you got that. You got that. No, no, no, it doesn't, it won't.
Speaker 1You got that I sleep with white sheets, babe, so. But, don't you want to feel sexy all the time? No, but I'm not when I'm sleeping.
Speaker 4It's for you.
Speaker 5I have a routine. It's for you. Hold on hold, on hold. On. Go on, robin, sorry.
Speaker 6So like, of course we want to feel sexy all the time, but sometimes you can't do what you want to do, Do you know? What I mean, if I do everything I wanted to do, I'd be in prison, exactly also that sexy is like to the individual and to the circumstance period.
Speaker 4So for me, like I'll do my little night time routine. I'll even like put a little perfume in my hair, put some music on before I get into bed, because in the moment, me getting into bed, that's what's sexy for me getting into bed, compared to my morning routine.
Speaker 2Also, are we categorising different sexes?
Speaker 5yeah, you know what? That's what I'm saying, that's what I'm trying to say like I can't keep up.
Speaker 4I can't keep up, then do you? Know what, and then another time you guys are going to be like oh, we're going to not muddle this thing, stuff like that, hold on, do you know?
Speaker 3what yeah?
Speaker 5in your question. No, I'm sorry. Like sexy men of mine just jumping into bed, it's not that much sexy. Do you know what it is?
Speaker 4A shower brushing my teeth, a little body butter.
Speaker 5Yeah, I do that too. Just, you know, a bit of cream in it, fair enough.
Speaker 3What was you going to say? I'm thinking of the basic level of your thought. Yeah, yeah, I think all of us, as humans, just want to be seen.
Speaker 2That's not my point. I think everybody does.
Speaker 3Everybody wants to be seen, whether it's dressed up or whatever. But the guys whether we wear a chain or drive a certain car, no, but the thing is everybody wants to be noticed, but you know what the thing is Because we are a relationship being the guys would admit that.
Speaker 2The guys would admit yo. When I get a, when I'm wearing my grey tracksuit, I want to be seen.
Speaker 4You didn't ask that question.
Speaker 1But for some reason you said you're doing it for yourself.
Speaker 4Yeah, You're doing it for yourself.
Speaker 1Okay, let me tell you this as well I love attention.
Speaker 3Me too, I love it. All women love attention.
Speaker 4No, no, no, no. I affirm the fact that I love attention. She actually admitted it.
Speaker 1Women love attention. I love when I look good and someone's going to tell me oh girl, you look good. Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 6I prefer attention from women than men, to be honest with you.
Speaker 4I like all of it.
Speaker 6I don't care Like if a woman no if a woman like says to me oh, you look really nice. I actually prefer it from a man.
Speaker 2Yeah, because you're all in no it's not no, she's my girl Bitch.
Speaker 5I feel like you guys need to switch up the girls that come up to you.
Speaker 6Do you know how? No, no, no you know how Listen.
Speaker 3Girls are never honest with you. I'm not just about to say that.
Speaker 2I'm going to say something, man. Sorry, sorry, it's not about that. No, we don't know what you guys are like.
Speaker 3No, no, come and tell us the truth about your gal yeah, and we still be like yo you feel like that?
Speaker 2this is what I would say, I mean yeah, maybe some do, I don't. I think sometimes I'm a bit so if your girls put on bare weight, you just say well, you look fat.
Speaker 4I don't say it like that. I might say would you like to come to the gym with me? Or, you know, I'll sweet talk it a little bit, but I'm not an enabler, I'm not that, and I think tough love is the strongest kind of love?
Speaker 5would you agree that most women are enablers?
Speaker 4I think some can be catch it bitch accusations.
Speaker 3That's where body confidence comes from body. What is it?
Speaker 2positivity positivity, whatever you call it but you know what's funny about that as well it's crazy, you know there's no body positivity for men. There's none.
Speaker 1There is. There is when you have money.
Speaker 2From the what I'm saying for the when they have money.
Speaker 5Listen listen, let me tell you no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no, no, no, no no no, no, I hear I
Speaker 1hear every most fat people I see. I hear him call himself curvy no, the thing is just because we live in a defensive world, everyone just feels defensive you can't call things the way they are, but I'm not arguing.
Speaker 2I'm not arguing the reason why it's said. I'm saying it's said, but I'm saying on the man's side, you're just fat that's it.
Speaker 4You're just short. That's not necessarily like derogative. You're just broke. That's it.
Speaker 2There's no you're not, you're not. You're not financially challenged, you're broke.
Speaker 1That's it. I think broke is financially challenged.
Speaker 2No, but the point is. The point is, though, all the men don't sit down and go you know what guys? You know what, guys? I think we're all financially challenged. Yeah, no, we, no, we don't.
Speaker 3We sit down and say yo, bro, we need to make some money. Do you know what? Do you know what? I think we had a group chat thing with our boys. Yeah, we were asking each other. We said, let's rate each other, who's dateable and who's least dateable.
Speaker 6We have a hierarchy.
Speaker 3And let me tell you something. The honesty that came out of those conversations was Is it?
Speaker 4not constructive criticism, though?
Speaker 2No, we don't.
Speaker 3But the thing about it is the fact that we meet you where you are. It's up to you where you want to go from there.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3You can accept whether that's who you are and you're happy with that.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 3We're just telling you what we think. That's it.
Speaker 2That's all that we're doing.
Speaker 5You've given us a platform too. It doesn. This is our evaluation.
Speaker 3It's up to you where you go from it, but if you are there, someone like being sugarcoated. There was no sugarcoat there, of course not Man's told you that you was undateable.
Speaker 2Bro, it's brutal. Oh, you was dateable. You was dateable. Your friends will tell you you're fat, you're broke, you're ugly you don't get no.
Speaker 1gal you your priorities straight.
Speaker 2I'd rather hear the truth. If I'm completely honest, yeah, same we do.
Speaker 4But what I would say, just to touch on something the reason why From Basics High though.
Speaker 2The reason why on the show I don't, because for me, I would tell guys. This is my advice to guys again. What I would say is this Don't listen to what women say, never, yeah, just listen to what women say Never.
Speaker 2Yeah, just just look at what they do. It's similar to men as well, and I'll get onto that. Just look at what they do. So for me I hear it all the time People come on the show I just want a nice guy. I don't care about height, I don't care about money. No, then I look at your ex and he's six foot four. I want a nice guy, but you're sleeping with the drug dealers, the drug dealer.
Speaker 2So we, because men, we adapt to the market. So once upon a time, let's go into the dream world Back in the day.
Speaker 4I've got so much to say.
Speaker 3I've got so much to say. I love that statement. Men, we adapt to the market.
Speaker 2We adapt to the market and is what used to be pussy. If you want this, you need this period. If you don't have this, there's no this do you know? What we did.
Speaker 1We married that fast forward 2024 afterwards, cheated afterwards. Hold on, no, that's not everybody remember what the rule is.
Speaker 3you're just throwing out the, but hold on. What's the rule is? You're just saying this, you're just throwing out there, but hold on what's the rule.
Speaker 2Remember what the rule is. The rule is no ring, no what.
Speaker 5No pussy, there you go Right.
Speaker 2So if every woman had that rule, who's he sleeping with?
Speaker 1That's the rule I have anyway. But who's he sleeping?
Speaker 2with If the majority had that rule. Who's he sleeping with? What's?
Speaker 5happening. Who's he sleeping with no one Book up coach.
Speaker 2It's because of ladies, we can't sleep with you if you don't let us. You hold the key. No, no, no, no. You hold the key.
Speaker 1You hold the key. No, no, no, that's not fair. Listen, hold on.
Speaker 3Listen, guys, it's facts. Women hold on sex, men control relationships.
Speaker 4Get him? No, no, no. Men control relationships? No, no, andrew, what Wait? No, no, no.
Speaker 6Wait, wait wait, what are you guys talking about?
Speaker 2What did you just say?
Speaker 4I'm going to say that anything like that predominantly influences us nowadays, or at least the upcoming years has been from a man, yeah. So if a woman feels that like they need to give it up or this hook up society. It's because a man's constructed it.
Speaker 3No, it's not. Tell me how. Hold on, hold, on hold on.
Speaker 2Hold on for a second.
Navigating Consent and Expectations
Speaker 3Hold on for a second for you to hold on for you to say that right? If it was that case, then the OnlyFans people that were making more money would be male no, no, no, but it is.
Speaker 6It's the men managing them, but OnlyFans why is that?
Speaker 4it's for a man's pleasure, onlyfans. It's for a man's pleasure.
Speaker 6Remember we've been approached by a lot of men so basically what you're saying trying to get us to pass them on women. I understand, I hear what.
Speaker 2I hear what. I hear what you're saying. Go on. Women are easily to influence, so you need a man to lead you no, yes, yes, yes, I agree, I agree, I disagree you're very easily influenced.
Speaker 6I disagree but that's okay and that's okay but then what's wrong with you guys? Why are you influencing?
Speaker 3us.
Speaker 1It's a bad way the problem with you no no, no by you, men, by you, men, I'm going to tell you why, robin, there's always going to be.
Speaker 2I'm going to tell you why Because of feminism.
Speaker 4What? Because of feminism. Oh my God, what do you mean?
Speaker 2Who promotes this? I don't need no man. Gold, queen, slave, body count don't matter, don't need to get married.
Speaker 1I don't let you have sex so what happens when I go on a date with a guy and I tell him straight I hope you're not trying to sleep with me, and he's like no, I would never force you to do anything. I would never force you. Go like trust me, I respect consent, is everything about me. And then something happened. I'm waiting for the ebay, so, okay, let's go up to my, to my bedroom, and he starts touching me.
Speaker 2Someone who said hold on, let me get up, please, sorry. Let me tell you why. No, no, no wait. Let me tell you why no, no, no.
Speaker 1Why would he do that? If the whole thing was, I would never force you let me you guys manipulate, us manipulate us, and then when? We give into the manipulation because, listen, this, this, this skin, this flesh is weak. I am weak. If you touch me, I might put myself in a situation I understand.
Speaker 2No, but, no, no, but this is what I'm saying, though, listen listen, listen this is, I get it. I hear your point, are you nearly?
Speaker 1there I get. I understand. I'm talking about boys anyway, I'm not talking about men watch.
Speaker 2Okay, I understand. Let me tell you the reason why. Because the first thing is for the most part. My two points are the first things for the most part yeah we know that you've slept with I'm not saying you, but in general you've probably slept with a guy on the first night or slept with him after the club, okay. So when you're saying that to us, we're like the chances are she's not a virgin and she's probably slept with someone after the club, okay.
Speaker 2So when you're saying that to us we're like the chances are she's not a virgin and she's probably slept with someone after the club, before I understand. And because women are not forward like you're not very forward to like yo, let's fuck. Some are, but most are not. Yeah, you want plausible deniability? Yeah, Right, so any? So for us we can't really listen. I'm a firm believer that women should be firm and no means no.
Speaker 3I'm a firm believer of that.
Speaker 2But a lot of women are too scared to say no, and I think you need to be firm and say no.
Speaker 1And men except no, no means no. Stay celibate and touch yourselves. Stay celibate and touch yourselves, because if you touch yourself, you're not increasing your body.
Speaker 2But then that's why she's saying like example, if she was like what? Oh no, read it out, google, it was were you just not having sex with someone.
Speaker 1No, because celibacy means no sex, which I understand. You can say that to the guy that's approaching you I am celibate, but then in the night you can touch yourself.
Speaker 6That's a celibacy sorry, I just want to challenge, I just want to know that, sorry hold that, hold that, hold that, for let me just challenge that.
Speaker 2Let me just challenge that, because you're already sorry, you're already contradicting yourself and I'm gonna tell you let me tell you why? Because you said to the guy I hope you're not trying to sleep with me tonight. But then when he touched you you gave in, so that means what you're saying wasn't true, if you was adamant about it, no, no, no.
Speaker 4What I'm saying is that's what I said to ladies.
Speaker 1I say to the woman stay celibate and if you want, if you feel horny touch yourself. Listen to what you're saying.
Speaker 3Listen to what you're saying.
Speaker 1What am I saying? Listen to what you're saying. What?
Speaker 3am I saying? I'm not saying it.
Speaker 2If you are not the one that controls the sex, you are telling him that you're a celibate because you're trying to control the sex.
Speaker 3No, no, no. He has to stand you. He's got you. He's got you, he's got you.
Speaker 2He's got you.
Speaker 3And then the part that you're making me laugh if you know that you don't want to be that person and you want to present yourself in that way, take accountability. Why did you go to the room?
Speaker 2Facts, facts, get him, get him. I didn't go to the room, though.
Speaker 3I'm just saying you go to the room I'm weak.
Speaker 4No, but I don't think so. No, no, no, wait, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. I hear you, junior.
Speaker 1I hear you Hold on.
Speaker 3No sex, no masturbating, no TV no, what name it? But let me tell you guys something Every time I was put in a predicament where I knew I would fall, I would leave. But you're a man.
Speaker 2No, no, no.
Speaker 3I think that's every human being, there's every human being. If you're a drug addict, yeah, and you know, if I enter this drug room.
Speaker 2Yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 4I'm going to leave.
Speaker 2Okay, I get that.
Speaker 4There should be a level of discernment. But if just say you've been in the company of a guy all night and he is that like wolf in sheep's clothing and you can't tell that he's been an absolute gentleman, you feel real safe and secure, and he's just like do you know what Does that?
Speaker 2does that mean you have to sleep with him? No, so then what are you on about? You accepted to go to his place because he wasn't there.
Speaker 4You're saying about like. Basically, you're essentially saying we should have a discernment of like. Why should we go to the room if we don't want to be in these situations? But if you've been in a guy's company and he's presenting himself as the perfect gentleman which a lot of them do- of course because we have to preach, they're gonna lure you.
Speaker 3This wasn't my point they're gonna lure you.
Speaker 4So we're saying if you're sat, okay, on a lovely day. Let's say it's cold out tonight and we've all been sat on a nice day and I've ordered the Uber, so why don't you come wait in, it's cold outside and if you've been a gentleman and there's no danger radar. Why would you not do that?
Speaker 2can I ask you two questions? What do men want most of the time? Sex, yeah, that's not my point, guys.
Speaker 4But then that's so what. That's why I say I want millions all the time. I don't want a bank, no, but my point is this is the thing.
Speaker 2No, no, I can get that. Facts All right. So if you sat in a room full of millions and you could take all the millions, and there was no consequence.
Speaker 4But we're in a society of questions. No, it's the same thing you want millions.
Speaker 2If you get opportunity to get millions, you're going to take it.
Speaker 3Sabrina, this was my point.
Speaker 4If you give, opportunity to get sex, you're going to take it, but imagine if it is. No it's not because it's not free yet. Sorry, no, no, no.
Speaker 2Have you gone into a situation where you didn't trying to sleep with them, but you was. Then you ended up in a position where you did. Has that happened?
Speaker 1Yeah, Sorry mom, Sorry dad.
Speaker 3Listen this never happened my point my point for Sabrina's this side of the conversation. Why are you lying?
Speaker 5Why are you lying my point from?
Speaker 3Sabrina's situation was. It's not the fact that someone might try and manipulate you to get in that situation. She was saying that she knows that she's weak in the sense that if you touch me, I am going to do something. What I'm trying to say to you, like if you're standing for a certain character trait and you know that me being in this bed with you might make me do what I'm not supposed to do, you would not put yourself so for me, so for me it's the part where I'm saying to you where you're like, oh, someone might manipulate you.
Speaker 3That's not the key point.
Speaker 4The key point for me is you can say whatever you want to say.
Speaker 3I'm not coming in that room because I know me as a person and I'm not going to then when I come in that room and something happens, I'm going to take a countermeasure.
Speaker 4If I come in there, I'm going to fuck you.
Speaker 5If I come in there, I'm going to fuck you, you've got the streets. I can't lie.
Speaker 2I can't lie. He's got you Speaking to the mic, because I can't hear what you're saying.
Speaker 1But the thing is right. What I'm saying is If you know you're weak Like myself, I won't even find myself.
Speaker 4In your room. Do you get what I? That's my point. That's my point. Okay, I misread it, but then again, celibacy, as I said saying you're celibate is just to tell the guy.
Speaker 1So he's turned off.
Speaker 4Now if he's only here for fucking around he's going to move on.
Speaker 1He's not going to message you, no more because he's going to look for the next target.
Speaker 2You're going to see that. Not necessarily.
Speaker 3That's when you know he's a man's whore At the same time what you said, though you control the sex, you still control the sex.
Speaker 1Control the sex in? What do you mean?
Speaker 3You're the one that has to say it.
Speaker 1Oh, okay, no worries, but I just don't put myself in a situation where he can even talk about sex.
Speaker 2So are you conceding that you control the sex? You control the sex, catch it bitch. So back to my, so, back to my, so, back to my, so, back to my original point. Without this, there's nothing you would achieve with.
Speaker 4What did we just talk about? What did you say? I'm confused About this on the finger.
Speaker 2Yeah, because the equation is this this, no sorry, this plus this equals this. Can I just say something Without this?
Speaker 6none this who ends relationships.
Speaker 2Most of the time, women.
Speaker 6So like no, no, who ends relationships?
Speaker 3Women Most of the time women.
Speaker 6Yeah. So when you all say oh men.
Speaker 3Exactly when a woman ends a relationship with another guy is to date another guy. That's not fair.
Speaker 6No no, no, it's not, no, it's not, no, it's not. Oh, no, no, it's not. I would, I would, I would, I can't downgrade, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1I cannot downgrade, I am sorry.
Speaker 4I'm sorry, there's no way I can downgrade.
Speaker 2Why are you melting, even if it doesn't apply to you? Women, don't date down.
Speaker 4No we don't. No, we don't. So if you're leaving, if you do that.
Speaker 2that's why I'm saying why you think you're better, Because if you believe that this guy if you think that this is the best guy and you see him as a guy, you are not going nowhere. Through the money, through the cheating, through everything, you're not leaving. But if you think that you're better than him, you will leave.
Speaker 4I'm telling you, Hi Bergamot.
Speaker 1I normally date if I see potential in someone it doesn't necessarily
Speaker 6mean yeah, not you I get that, but I see potential in people I can be like okay.
Speaker 2But guess what, Robin?
Speaker 5You are Robin, let's just say're a unicorn.
Speaker 2You are a unicorn and you are special.
Traditional Gender Roles in Dating
Speaker 3But in general you are the exception of the rule. Yeah, women don't think like that. You don't understand it.
Speaker 4No, but I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
Speaker 3What's wrong with women?
Speaker 4dating up and men dating down.
Speaker 6Nothing. You're not leveling each other out right Nothing, but we are the true lovers.
Speaker 4That's my point. We are the true lovers. You know why?
Speaker 2because, let me tell you why they're the true lovers, because we will date down. We don't care what you've got because, your sorted roles are different because, you're sorted.
Speaker 1You're not looking for a woman to come and sort you hold on.
Speaker 4Sorry, let her finish, go on I said, the roles are different you can date down, because you're not looking for a woman brings is entirely different. Like in most circumstances, ideally the man's like the man of the house, breadwinner, all that blah, blah, blah so realistically it doesn't really like matter what like dating down if you like for the matter, but if you're if women are arguing and a lot of women are if you're arguing for equality, not me not you yeah, because we've got a sofa full of unicorns, that's fine but in general, if you're arguing for equality, you can't have both so if you want, equality there should be no dating down.
Speaker 2You should date a man down, it's just whoever you link with. But there's a reason the broke guys don't get novelty most of the time and the rich guys get all of it they do get pussy.
Speaker 1They just need to look for broke pussy as well. No, no, no, no, no, no. Do you know why? No, no, no, no.
Speaker 3Because a woman's not looking for a broke pussy. They want to look for someone who's going to look after them.
Speaker 4It's not even necessarily looking after it's like just say if I'm, struggling. If I'm struggling and ideally I'm looking at a man for leadership, it doesn't have to be like a mansion and you have millions. I just need you to either be a little bit better or massively better, because I can't be struggling and struggling with you. What?
Speaker 1like literally how much did you make today?
Speaker 4let me, let me just make this clear, because I've said a lot of, because I've said a lot of negative, I can be a full like relaxed woman with my brain switched off, because even like sat here right now, I've got a hundred of things going up, but as if, if a man is looking after that in what way I see fit, then I can come and just be in my feminine and look after him.
Speaker 2I completely agree with that. So I'm going to put this out there, because I've said some, a lot, a lot of negative things you people might say, even though it's true there's a lot of negative things. Personally, when women are in their feminine energy, the best. Sorry, why did you have to do it?
Speaker 4I was like I was, I was there you're getting there, you can carry on, it's fine. No, you can, we were listening. Yeah, when they're in their feminine energy.
Speaker 2Yeah, they are the actual, the best support mechanism but, you, but you have to be a support mechanism, and I'll tell you why. I personally don't think that you handle stress very well I've seen it I don't, especially certain times of the month, and even still, I think there's only one week. Yeah, I was reading that there's only one week where your hormones are normal.
Speaker 2The rest of that other month your hormones are not normal yeah and then so there's one week where you're actually very motivated and you know, maybe not you, because we've got unicorns, as I said, for most, most of the time, you know, there's one month where you're you're 100, you're productive at our best and another three.
Speaker 3You're not, no, you know because I work. I work in the medical field. Every time when someone's a unicorn, as you say, we call it like there's a rule to. There's a law that everyone follows, but there's always an exception to the rule, of course. So we always say, there's always that one that doesn't follow the trail. But you can't build a thesis on exception of the rule, that's fair.
Speaker 1That's why I'm rare.
Speaker 2I personally think Go on. Say what you're going to say Go on, drop it I personally think get him that women shouldn't actually work.
Speaker 4I was going to say, yeah, that is what I'm working for.
Speaker 3I don't you know what you know, what I don't know? I didn't expect that reaction right but because these guys want to stay at home.
Speaker 2I want to be at home and that's cool everybody guys want to stay at home and that's cool.
Speaker 3Don't get me wrong Even.
Speaker 2I would like to stay at home. I would too. Don't get me wrong. I think you should have the choice to.
Speaker 3And I think you should work electively.
Speaker 2And if you, want to take two weeks off because you got crabs or whatever. You should.
Speaker 4I think that's the last man. You know why. You know why.
Speaker 2Because we bought into what you told us, that you want equality, you want to work. So we're like let's give them what they want.
Speaker 6Do you know what I see? Do you know what I see? I see potential men. Sorry, let her go, let her go, sorry. I like a real traditional man personally, so that's usually I'm like, oh, I'm listening.
Speaker 2But are you traditional, though? That's the problem.
Speaker 4Yeah, that's the issue If you want a traditional man you have to be a traditional man.
Speaker 2Do you guys understand what you say? That's the fact, do you?
Speaker 3understand the words when you say I am traditional.
Speaker 5No, I think that's what it is.
Speaker 3No, you're not understanding what I mean.
Speaker 6Do you understand, like cooking and cleaning tradition okay, a virgin Mary, that's what you mean, but obviously we're in 2024, no one's a virgin Mary.
Speaker 2So then guys want you to work.
Navigating Relationship Roles and Expectations
Speaker 1I am so guys want you to work, I am please, let's not, let's not mix everyone.
Speaker 6I like one that doesn't like doing, that's like working towards me, not working. But I like to have my own money as well.
Speaker 3But then you guys are not understanding like for when I think traditional, no clubbing, it's so hard yeah, that's no clubbing, that's fucked to be honest, traditional back in the day. When you think about back in the day we're talking 2014 this woman lived at home with her parents with her parents.
Speaker 3She worked in the house for her parents she had no goals, and for her husband no ambitions only thing that she worked towards was to look good for the future husband for the husband for a future husband that her parents were going to pick for her as they saw fit.
Speaker 4But that's then we're in 2020 when you guys think traditional yo my view of tradition. This is what I'd say. Being traditional is having like a providing man, a man that goes and works and does all of that and let's say my predominant roles are the cooking, cleaning and all of this, but if I wanted to go out and work we could go out together.
Speaker 4We could go out together, but it's like me working isn't like, oh, I've got to do this to come and pay the bills. It's just so I can do, and maybe that means me taking care of all my extra, I'm up for that. But you just said about the clubbing.
Speaker 2It would be in the sense of if that's part of our lifestyle yeah, if that's part of our lifestyle, oh, you can go. Oh, yeah, I like that. If that's part of our lifestyle, you can go clubbing with your man, that's fine. Yeah, not by yourself, though.
Speaker 3Yeah, no, no, if you met your husband, I'd let my man go out a relationship.
Speaker 4I'm not really on the clubbing scene.
Speaker 3Not really On a birthday. I am no on a birthday or things like that. Fair enough for birthdays. That's just my perspective. Do you know what it is?
Speaker 4I think there's certain areas that you're not in when you're in a relationship. So I don't know about clubbing or sitting and watching.
Speaker 2Netflix at home Is your man club would you mean?
Speaker 4do you think it's the same thing?
Speaker 1it's never the same. In what way would you mean?
Speaker 4so do you think it's the same thing?
Speaker 2because you're saying I'm aware it's a sorry guys yeah, so you're you going to the club and him going to the club? So if he went to the club and you don't go to the club, would you think that's unfair?
Speaker 4if he went to the club, and I don't go, yeah, yeah, because he's told me I can't go are they kids in this situation.
Speaker 2Yeah, well, we either one you don't want to go, or he said you can't go he can go if he wants to go even if he said you can't go no, if he said I can't go, no oh, so it's equality. You won.
Speaker 4That's what I'm saying yeah, no, oh. So you want, so wait. You don't want to wear it, so wait so you don't want him to so you don't want him to. You want him to pay all seem fair. But then that's the social aspect, like if he's going to go out clubbing, why can't?
Speaker 6I go because it's not the same thing.
Speaker 4That's my point, I think that's like that's between each individual relationship. That's something that should be discussed.
Speaker 2I got the manly is if he's, if he's saying that you're able to go, that's fine, but I would you be upset with that.
Speaker 4Well, probably a little bit yeah.
Speaker 2So you think that because you can't go, he shouldn't go? Yeah, so you want equality is what I'm saying. No, no no, no, you're saying you do. Do you know what? Wait, hold on, wait, wait, because I need to. That's not equality, no.
Speaker 4Because for me, that's just a preference 15 relationships.
Speaker 2So the woman is the homemaker no, but do you, do you want to be led? Yeah, do you trust the guy to lead you? Well, ideally, yeah. Do you trust what the guy? Do you trust what the leader is saying to you? Yeah, is the right thing to do. He's actually the leader.
Speaker 4So if you're, if I have a discernment like and okay, if you phrase it like that, then fine. If I feel him enough to be like the person I'm married to and I'm moving with, I'd, I guess, trust that he has a good reason to say that so you wouldn't throw a tantrum, no more. I'd still have a tantrum it doesn't mean I'm doing anything about it?
Speaker 2Nearly, she's not ready yet. My point is this, the point that I would say to the women if you have, so if he, says to you you don't want you to go to the club, because there are reasons why we say not to go to the club and there's reasons why it's not the same. When you go out, men are going to approach you. You're drinking alcohol. I'm not saying anything will happen, but you actually are in somewhat danger for men.
Speaker 4It's not the same thing, no, but it's likewise. You're not in danger, but you're definitely to get approached, no matter what you do yeah, but then you should trust me that that's not a thing.
Speaker 2No, but andrew tate said this once right, and I agree with it. Right? He said he's got a lamborghini, yeah, and he said just because it's got locks on it and no one can break in, should we just sit there and watch someone try and break it?
Speaker 4No, I'm not saying that, but I think there's a discernment that you should be able to trust each other first.
Speaker 2Anyone ever touch your bottom while you've been out.
Speaker 4Maybe when I was younger, but nobody would dare do that now.
Speaker 2Okay, because you'll fix them. So you turn around mouth off, it's all about.
Speaker 5Sabrina right.
Speaker 4So he touches you.
Speaker 2You turn around, you give him a mouth, he slaps you. Then what?
Speaker 1And I call my mate.
Speaker 2I cry Exactly. So now I have to come down to the club. I'm talking about this. I've got to come down to the club. I don't know who this guy is. He might have a knife. I get into a confrontation.
Speaker 4I get accidentally stabbed and then die Just because you went to the club. But that's not just because of the club. That's going to happen anywhere that is potential have you not seen just sitting on the London subway?
Speaker 2that stuff happens. That stuff happens. It's unlikely, though you guys listen more likely in a club.
Speaker 3You see the conversation you're having now. This is how I look at things like. For me, I feel like there's a society way of thinking about how relationships should be like, and there's how your relationship should be like.
Speaker 4Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3And when you get to that stage, there's no one word answer, there's no gray and white.
Speaker 5There is what works for your relationship, your beaks.
Speaker 2The only problem in those situations the Tiki's kicked him.
Speaker 3Nice no.
Speaker 4Look at his face. I told you Don't take the Tiki.
Speaker 2No it's not. Look at his face.
Speaker 3I told him don't take the tiki?
Speaker 2No, but like do you know why? Don't take the tiki.
Speaker 4Do you know why Do?
Speaker 3you know why? Do you know why? I think for me, growing up so I used to be like a youth leader in the church. I used to follow my pastor into like marriage counseling sessions, and what you learn in that whole spectrum Is no relationships the same. No one requires the same. No one is a giver more or taker more, but there's always a problem when no one knows when they stand or what role they play, or someone is Giving too much and someone is taking too much. I agree with that. So for me, in in my perspective, from watching all these things and even me in my situations, is I've always said to someone like, if you feel like this is making you feel worse than you are as a person, then I would rather you step away from it. And if I feel like I feel like I'm getting worse from the person, then and if I feel like I feel like I'm getting worse from the person, I'll step away from it. But we have to have agreed where we want this to go.
Speaker 3You have to know, because you know what I said to you, the boys we're talking about who should be in a relationship and who shouldn't. I used to say to the boys I said if the girl that you pick does not align with your purpose that you see in your mind, then allow it.
Speaker 1You're wasting time Because? For then, allow it, because for me there's two decisions you make in life.
Speaker 3The two big decisions is what religion or faith you believe in, because that determines who you might be, and the woman you marry, because those are the two things that will ruin your life to the pits of hell.
Speaker 2I get that, but the point I was trying to make is this if you're a traditional woman and you believe in men leading, then be led.
Speaker 6Are you going to let an idiot lead you off a cliff? Are you going to fight? That's what I mean. You can't just let anyone.
Speaker 2No, but you're skipping steps, Sorry. So hold on. You're skipping steps because you've already picked him. Don't pick him if he's not a good leader.
Speaker 4What I'd say say to you. So example before I've even married somebody to make these decisions for me, we've already had discussions to like, so that's not a surprise, whether about me going to the club or not going to the club, that's a discussion we've already had, and whether I'm happy about it or not, or vice versa. But, that being said, I would pick a secure partner and I'd hope you'd have security in me as well.
Speaker 2It's back to security. How that that work.
Speaker 4So let's go on to a dream world.
Speaker 2It's a club thing. We can use a different example. Yeah, your man comes to you. He says I think we should move to Thailand. I got us you don't need to worry Like we should go to Thailand. Would you go with him?
Speaker 4Yes. Yeah, I don't see why not, and so I had absolutely like there was a big reason that I couldn't yeah and if he said to not go to the club and you wanted to go, would you go?
Speaker 2no, if what sorry if he said not to go to the club and you wanted to go, would you go?
Speaker 4I'd have to pick the battles. What if it was absolutely no? Can you see the problem?
Speaker 2no, the what I'm saying, it's a petty argument. No, hear what I'm saying, the reason why.
Speaker 4Why would he want me to go to the club because the man, the man I would pick, would not be insecure. No, it's not about insecurity, no, and he's not going to be scared about dangers that happen all over the world. Wait, wait, wait. And I'm saying it because I'm not a big club girl, I'm just saying it's a petty argument.
Speaker 2The point I'm trying to make, is that I said the Thailand thing because most of them want to go on holiday and they want the sun, so that's fair enough. You probably would go.
Speaker 4What I'm saying is, if you want to be a leader, you have to be, a follower regardless of how you feel about it, but I'm not just going to take anything for nothing.
Speaker 2It's not me relocating Do you trust him Relocating?
Speaker 1Yes, I do so then, trust him.
Speaker 4It's not about not trusting If you're just saying something to be petty.
Speaker 2She's been waiting for a while.
Speaker 4Sorry.
Speaker 1Thank you Sorry.
Speaker 2Sorry.
Speaker 1For example right, I'm an authoritative woman, right, but I need an alpha male, right? Oh, so you're masculine. Wait, wait, wait, no, no, no, no. Start again More or less.
Speaker 5She's a masculine woman. You're authoritative.
Speaker 1From the core. I'm a masculine woman.
Speaker 5You're authoritative, no, no no, yeah so from the core.
Speaker 1I'm a masculine woman, but deep down I just want to be a feminine woman. That's what I want to be.
Speaker 1Right, so I need a lead in like an alpha male, right. So I believe in following my man. Now, the reason why I'm single out of choice is because I'm not ready to commit to certain things over the times, like I'm 21, I'm a young girl, but over the relationships I realized that there's a lot of things that I didn't look from the male perspective. Do you get what I mean, as in what you guys said. Basically, if my man says don't go to the club, my future husband, as I like to say on my yeah. So if my future husband tells me don't go to the club, I'm sorry I'm not going to the club.
Speaker 1And this is me being very honest, because I have learned from my mistakes and a lot of times, when someone tells you don't go and you go, you realize why they were telling you not to go. Do you get what I mean? But where I feel the problem lies is when you met me, you know I was a girl who's always outside. I'm a lifestyle influencer, so I do go outside, right? So if I'm telling you let's go out, or you want to go out with your mates and you're not bringing me and you're telling me you stay at home, let's say today, if it's one day, fair enough. My mind it becomes a habit. All the time you stay at home, you stay it. All the time you stay at home, you stay at home. There's no kids. Let me just put the, because I feel like you guys are putting this context into your own context. There's no kids, so there's no kids whose context?
Speaker 1you guys are putting it in your favor as in like you guys. If there's kids let's say we have five-year-old kids Of course I won't leave my kids at home in the name of a club. What's in the club? That like, do you get what I mean? But if there's no kids and you're telling me one, two, three times, stay at home. Is there a mistress at the club that you're trying to see? Yeah, can I ask you?
Speaker 2a question Wait, let me respond. So, the club thing. This is the way I see it, because you can't have both. So the way I see it is this we're either traditional and I'm the leader and what I say goes, or we're equal, it's all equality and it's 50-50 everything.
Speaker 1No, no, no, that's not fair. No, I'm saying that's not. Why is it on extreme?
Speaker 2Wait wait wait, let me just clarify what I mean. Yeah, when I say what I say goals, right, if you're a good leader, right, you're going to take your subordinates' opinion on board. That's what good leaders do. So when I say what I say, goals, there might be a point.
Speaker 4point because at some point right. But they lead by example. So a leader wouldn't go to the club and say you can't go to the club Period. No, but the difference is.
Speaker 2Is that, unfortunately, I understand? I say this all the time men and women are not the same. So it's not the same.
Speaker 4No but something like a nightclub is not a dire thing.
Speaker 3But it's not the same. It's, if you were like.
Speaker 4if you were like, do you know what? I'm quitting alcohol today, this is what's going to be beneficial to me. Can you please support me on this journey? And that's a whole different conversation. Why?
Speaker 1are you, even with a woman?
Speaker 6As a man. Why do you need to?
Speaker 4be a girl you want to be like but you can't do this, but I can.
Speaker 3Do you know what? I understand what you're saying? I'm a lead in my industry. One thing that holds you in high regards and respect from everybody in an industry is when you are a man of integrity. And people watch you act a certain way.
Speaker 5So when you tell someone, you don't do something.
Speaker 3The reason why they believe you is because they see you working it, and it works out.
Speaker 5So for me.
Speaker 3I'm just saying if you're going to tell somebody to not do something. You lead by example. And if she?
Speaker 4wants to go to the club.
Speaker 6That's a fair point.
Speaker 3So for me, I'm just saying but if you're going to tell, somebody to not do something, and you give the explanation, you lead by example, and if she wants to go to the club, you take her with you so she can see how you lead an example in that industry. That way you don't have to stress, because when she sees you in that environment, she'll be like you know what, like you know what. I don't even want to come. It's fine, stay at home, I'll stay at home, because I have seen
Speaker 4you conduct?
Speaker 2yourself, I get it. I get it. Slay queen yeah yeah, all right.
Speaker 6So why do you need to be at the club? No, hold on, wait, wait, wait.
Speaker 2We need to go and get some milk. It's 11pm, tes, okay, but I'm gonna tell you.
Speaker 4Not to walk in the dark, cause it's not the same. So I can walk in the dark, but that's a Wait, wait, wait, that's a necessity.
Speaker 6Alright, I just wanna go shop and get something.
Speaker 2It's not even necessary.
Speaker 6Why do you wanna be? Why do you wanna be at the club?
Speaker 2No, no, no.
Speaker 4Hold on, no, but no but hear what I'm saying?
Speaker 2No, no, no, but Hold on, wait, wait, wait, no, no, it's an example, forget a necessity. There's something. We want to go to the shop, just want to get something from the shop, not a necessity. We don't have to go. But yo, we want to have a drink tonight. Yeah, as an example, hold on wait, we want to have a drink tonight. As an example, I'm not going to send you to the shop at 11 o'clock at. Do that I'm gonna do, because that's my point now listen.
Speaker 2I actually agree what you're saying. I understand the leader thing and yeah, I get all that, but some people lead slight in slight different ways. I'm saying if you pick your leader, you have to listen okay so I'm saying so to go, if you so no, no but the point is is that the reason I'm? Telling you not to go. It's because it's dangerous and I don't want to put you in that danger. But I will go it's two different things.
Speaker 4But then why do you need to go to the club not?
Speaker 2to the shop. Why do you need to go?
Speaker 1it's the same thing, though.
Speaker 2Hold on wait no, but the thing is we don't need to go? No, regardless it's still a no.
Speaker 6No, wait, wait, wait, wait wait, wait Junior wait, wait, wait, it's the club.
Speaker 2That's fine, but I'm saying, if you want traditional, you have your leader.
Speaker 4And if you believe in him, I wouldn't pick a leader that makes such silly, like that's just Super posturous.
Speaker 5How dare he tell me?
Speaker 3It's crazy, do you?
Speaker 5know, what.
Speaker 2Do you?
Speaker 6know what A woman that chooses a man that wants to go to the club is a woman that makes bad Guys.
Speaker 3it's not about Hold on, gina wait, I understand.
Speaker 2Well, basically, what you want is a leader that will do everything that you want them to do.
Speaker 4No, not what I want. That's not what I want. The minute he says, the minute he tells you.
Speaker 2The minute he tells you something that you don't want to do, it's a problem.
Speaker 4No, because that is petty, telling me I can't walk to the shop even though I want to, very late at night that is. I can process it and be like you know what fine. He wants to keep me safe, right, I understand that, but me wanting to.
Speaker 2So what's the difference between that and the club?
Speaker 4Because the club is a one If you don't go to the club.
Speaker 2So is the alcohol at night. Everyone at 11 o'clock, wait the alcohol at. I'm telling you not to go but you don't mind that, because we want some alcohol because that's a necessity stop for a second, stop for a second wait, no sorry.
Speaker 3I need to get everyone else on the end.
Speaker 1So I understand what Sabrina is saying, right, but I just disagree a bit to one point. It's like Tesco's and the club is two different things. Like tesco, there's no alcohol and tesco is him going to the like, him going to tesco in the night and me not going. It's kind of like a gesture as in. I don't want you to be outside, I don't want you to be like this. It's a bad world we live in. Do you get? Anything can happen. At least he can defend himself. Do you get what I mean? Now the club. As I said, if you are in a relationship and your man is telling you not to go to the club, fair enough, first time you can just stay off, don't go to the club. But if it comes one, two, three times he's going out with his friends to the club and he keeps on telling you don't go to the club, my head start popping up. Why can't I go to the pub? Cheeks are clapping at me.
Speaker 3Do you get what I'm saying? No, no, this is what I was trying to explain in my industry. Guys, when people are watching you and they look at you as a leader, they look at every move you make.
Speaker 1So bring your woman.
Speaker 3When you move, when you tell people to follow you, yeah, they have to have a reason to follow you and your way has to prove to be legitimate type of thing. Right, let's say you tell people not to do something, but you keep doing it. They're asking you as my leader, I should follow you.
Speaker 4You're going to the club. Why am I not following you there? Yeah, can I?
Speaker 3use an example.
Speaker 3Hold on, I'm just giving you an example. You said about the shops example. Right yeah, you said about the shops, for example. Right yeah, I could say to her let's go to the shops together, let's go get drinks, because we want drinks Right now as a leader Don't worry, it's night, I got you. But the thing is we both want drinks, so I'm leading you To the drinks Type of thing. So for me, to you guys, it's more of the Sense of like, if you're going to someone, else there's no one that's going to believe you when you're contradicting what you're saying.
Speaker 3Well, what I will say because if you're saying that, if you're saying that there's men that are going to chat to her, she's got something there's women that are going to chat to you.
Speaker 2Let me tell you if you're that man of high caliber if you're that man of high caliber, you will get better.
Speaker 4Women, don't go and chat. Like I said, wave a little champagne, but all people are coming over fair enough. My issue isn't being told not to go to the club. That is fine, but don't tell me not to do something and then go do something that isn't a necessity. Okay, do you understand?
Speaker 2let's go to a duo. Let's calm it down. Give me heat. I'll use me as an example. Please use you in my workplace.
Speaker 2yeah, my employees, I tell them your phone's not allowed. Now I have my phone on me and I use it whenever I want, but I'm the boss Now I'm not saying that to take the. There's a reason why I've got the phone. But the point is they don't know the reason. But I'm on call and there's a reason why I've got the phone. But if you have to explain everything, you don't always have to explain everything to the people underneath you, do you know?
Speaker 3what I'm trying to say, so I'm saying no but the point I'm trying to.
Speaker 2No, it's all leadership things.
Speaker 5I'm simply saying no, no, no, I'm saying to you this my instructions to you is not to use your phone.
Speaker 4I'll use my phone.
Speaker 5Yeah, in a work environment, because you're the boss man.
Speaker 4But guys, what's it say in the relationship of?
Speaker 2the bus, what is your logic about going to the class? The point I was trying to make is that, because I actually I wouldn't necessarily do that, because there is a slight unfairness to it, I get it, but my point I was trying to make is that you should follow the person who you've picked to lead you or even if you don't agree or if it's got to the point where no one can agree and you think you know this is not the person, this is not the right person to leave me, then leave, that's fine.
Speaker 2But you can't have both is the point I was making now my solution would be because if I, if I, my girl, wouldn't go to the club, I would say I'd prefer you to go to the bar, I, I'll even pay, but the club no all right and that's fair. No, that's something you guys have discussed beforehand, so what you're saying.
Navigating Equality and Relationship Dynamics
Speaker 4How I would take it is an abuse of power. If somebody's saying I can do this but you can't, I feel like that's an abuse of power because there isn't a real reasoning, because you just don't want to accept the reason however, that would have been something you would have discussed before and that would have been my choice to continue a relationship if I had.
Speaker 6How many men get stabbed in the club, though? It's actually more unsafe for you guys.
Speaker 2We can navigate around certain things Wait what?
Speaker 3How is that even a point? How often do you see people get stabbed in the club? No men. I'm asking you, hold on how often do you see men get stabbed in the club?
Speaker 6Have you heard of shutting him? That's why it's called shutting him.
Speaker 3But my question to you is how regular do you hear?
Speaker 1I think it's very childish for a man to go to a club. Even he has a woman, though.
Speaker 3I mean he's going for his friends at that point.
Speaker 1That's what I was saying. His friends are single.
Speaker 2The thing is, though, the truth is if he's a proper guy who's you probably don't go to the club.
Speaker 4Yeah, that's the truth. Thank you for telling us the truth, and I would say that on both parts. I say that on both parts, but my point, again, my point, I was making is that if you chose him to lead you, you should listen but don't abuse power.
Speaker 2Be careful what you wish for, but remember there's always going to be things that you don't agree with. You've got to understand that there has to be that leads and that's if you want a guy, you need.
Speaker 4I like a drink. But if he was like I'm on this journey, I don't want a drink. I want you to support me. You're not going to hear anything come out of my mouth. But if you're going to be like I'm going to the club but you're staying at home, I think that's an abuse of power, just putting that out there and the thing is, I think you guys choose where.
Speaker 1Okay, yeah, that's very true, that's very true. But what I'm trying to say, bitch, yeah, what I'm trying to say is like sorry, sorry, sorry, go on, sorry, because we need to, because you know it's getting that label.
Speaker 3Yeah, I know I'm sorry.
Speaker 1I'm sorry, I know so I'm joking, joking, I'm messing around I'm joking, sorry, I just wanted to lie in the up a bit. I'm sorry. Yeah, no worries, but for me equality of sex is a big part of it.
Speaker 2I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you guys are taking a piss now. I'm sorry.
Speaker 5Equality of sex.
Speaker 1I'm genuinely sorry, now I'm not going to do it again. It's all about equality, sorry, go. Example I'm saying an example right Now. If I'm asking him to pay for all of these things, definitely I'm not asking him to come. And I don't know. The baby's crying at night. Oh babe, come and carry the baby. I will do that, honey. I will do that, honey. You come back from home. You're tired, babe. I will heat hot water for you. I'm going out in the morning, the same way you are. We come back at the same time. Then, all of a sudden, I have to cook for you, I have to clean for you, I have to take care of the kids while you're sleeping.
Speaker 2I disagree with that. That's what a lot of men do that's what equality of sex. They do and I disagree with that.
Speaker 1I 50-50, it's 50-50 yeah but 50-50 can be like you're paying, I'm working physically but, guys, this is what. I said to you guys everything is like it's relative to the individual yeah, I have a.
Speaker 3I have a.
Speaker 1I have a daughter would you like her to work for a man?
Speaker 3stop for a second? No, exactly.
Speaker 2I hope I don't get a daughter, honestly.
Speaker 3I have a daughter. I'll give you guys a prime example.
Speaker 1Shout out to Junior's daughter we love you.
Speaker 3You got a lot of work, bro Her growing up. I wanted to be around her, I wanted to change the diaper, Of course, I wanted to carry her, I wanted to sleep next to her and I used to do those type of chores cook with her, clean for her feed or whatever. And I think this is where I was trying to explain. Was it's so hard when you are trying to put things in a box, in the sense, like men?
Speaker 2should be like this.
Speaker 3Women should be like this. Sometimes a guy wants to be involved in that person's no, but you know the difference is.
Speaker 2This is the hard, you know the difference is. It's life? No, but you know what the difference is. This is the hard part. You know what the difference is. It's elective.
Speaker 6It is elective. So you can do it if you want to Same with the working. They can do it if they want to but someone should have responsibility of it but if you do the last thing I'm going to say.
Speaker 2if you want Listen, if you want a guy to, I have to work and do nothing. I'm telling you now you need to shut up and sit down.
Speaker 3That's all I'm saying.
Speaker 2That's what I'm going to do so if he says don't go to the club you're not going to the club.
Speaker 1That's all I'm saying. That's why I'm single by choice. If you want that guy, I'm telling you it's not about that's why I'm saying you feel yes, I do, and I'm expressing, and I'm expressing that okay please.
Speaker 4I'm in a relationship ideally I wouldn't expect either of us to be in the club. That's how I feel I'm in a relationship, because we've got other things to be doing. However, I don't know if they no.
Speaker 1You have a future A future to build.
Speaker 4If he turned around and, like I will say again and said you cannot go to the club, but I am, yeah, I'm not going to, I'm in a relationship is, if I don't know, it's my friend's 30th birthday and they're hosting it in a club. Ideally, hopefully, we'd go together. But if not, you go out for your boys, I go out for my girls' birthdays and special occasions.
Speaker 2So you don't believe that it's right for him to do that To do what?
Speaker 5Call to the club that no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You see, no, no, no, that's not leading, that's not leading you guys know what that is not leading.
Speaker 2So the person being led, he will not be the leader.
Speaker 6The person being led Tell the person who's leading, how to lead. No, he will not be the leader we choose. No, that's not the leader I choose.
Speaker 2Yeah, so you're going to find a guy that does all these things that you say, Because I heard you talk about diamonds and all that. So you want a guy who can pay for all that pay for the rent, pay for the bills, your lifestyle sorted. And then on top of that, you also want an equal say.
Speaker 4I don't want an equal say, but I just don't want an abuse of power? No, okay.
Speaker 1It's an abuse of power.
Speaker 2So every once in a while.
Speaker 5No, no or humans.
Speaker 3You know what? Sit down. You know your example? Yeah, sit down, no way.
Speaker 2You're having an abuse of power. You know why? Why?
Speaker 1Because, you would be using what?
Speaker 4you wouldn't want them to do to you?
Speaker 1No, no, no, you would be using. No way You'd be using.
Speaker 2You'd be using yeah, for can pay for all your bills. That's an abuse of power.
Speaker 4Wait, hold on. That's an abuse of power.
Speaker 6How dare you?
Speaker 2lose your looks to get him to pay for everything. Abuse of power.
Speaker 3Pay your share. Stop In our culture.
Speaker 1You guys use it to your own context.
Speaker 4If he's your man, who is he? Don't argue with me.
Speaker 3Hold on, hold on, stop, stop To be fair that last thing was a joke.
Speaker 2I hope it was. That's what I thought. I thought, obviously you know what it is yeah.
Speaker 3When you guys say stuff like someone should do everything you say it sounds like a.
Speaker 4I'm not a dummy a slave situation.
Speaker 1It's giving them an address. I understand.
Speaker 3I'm not a dummy but even when you book your master you can still ask questions so it's the way it's delivered.
Speaker 5Your delivery is the lie Delivery. You know why.
Speaker 3Do you know why? Do you know why? If someone picked you and they think that you're good at leading cool fair, whatever, but the way you're delivering it is kind of like you're saying you have no option and people like to abuse found men. And that sounds like slavery.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 5It's Alright. So, lee, please do not walk in front of that car, yeah, because it may ruin you over, I know, because it does the tone.
Speaker 2Policing is mad. Yo. There's a fucking car. Get out of the way, get out of the way of the car.
Speaker 4Don't talk to me like that Get out of the way of the car, but that's like saying Don't step out the front door Because you're going to get hit by a bus.
Speaker 2No, but it's saying that the town policing is mad.
Speaker 3So it's the way he says it. It's not what he said yeah, but that's what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 2She's like obviously so you don't care what he said, we're on council culture no, but she don't care what he said, she just cares about how he says it, the way you're delivering.
Speaker 6It is interpreted as you're saying about delivery. Would you choose a man to be your leader who says that I am using some extremes.
Speaker 5I'm purposely doing that.
Speaker 3Yeah, yeah of course but do you get my point? Yeah, we get your point. Final year leader do you think religion is still relevant?
Speaker 1yes, very yeah, and god forbid those who don't believe in god can we just get, can we?
Speaker 2I'm out for you people. Sorry so hold. Can we get? Can we get? Sorry, so hold on. Can we get? Can we get clear and concise answers, starting with yourself in the end?
Speaker 1As in, if religion is still accurate. Yes, if you don't believe in God, I think you have no purpose in this life. You will never be happy. You only believe in facts and this world is such a defensive justifiable like you need to believe in god.
Speaker 3God is the source of happiness. All right, geez, I've read the bible four times back to front. Okay, crazy brother, um, I believe in god, and I believe believing in god has made my life better amen, oh for me. To anybody else, I would say um, find your path. I don't want to say whether it's bad or good, but find your path. Okay, I believe in god.
Speaker 6I don't want to say whether it's bad or good, but find your path, Period. I believe in God. You don't have to believe in God, but look at the people that don't. Their life is a mess. They're doing all sorts to themselves that's not for me to choose but they're not happy. Fair point.
Speaker 4Yeah, I definitely think religion is still relevant today, but it's maybe not pronounced in all the traditional ways Like you've got spirituality. Why are you laughing? Yes, spirituality, sabrina.
Speaker 2You know why.
Speaker 1Because in my head you know why.
Speaker 2Do you know why? Sorry, because I was going to ask her yeah. I was going to say yo.
Speaker 4What were you going to ask me?
Speaker 2I was going to ask you if God told you not to go to the club.
Speaker 4God wouldn't say that to me. Oh my god, he loves me.
Speaker 2You would listen, that's the thing and you should look at your man as God. But anyways, let's wrap it up you see, so I ended on that, so listen our last words. This is all I want you to do. I want you to say how you think the show went, and then I want you to plug any social media that you may have. We'll start with Lisa.
Speaker 4Yeah, I think the show was good. I think it was funny, entertaining, and you can find me on the socials at MissSabrinaDubois.
Speaker 6I always enjoy the show, you guys, oh God you guys. I always get a little bit lit by the end.
Speaker 2But yeah, my socials are Robin with a Y, mccoy spot, m-u-k-o-y-i and if you want to get on the show, drop her a DM she's so important to you, the recruiter.
Speaker 5That's why I'm here yes, me too you can't get in unless you go for her alright period period period.
Speaker 3I want to say thank you for everyone for having me you guys have been great guests. Thank you for everyone for having me. You guys have been great guests. Thank you, robin, for inviting me and thank you to the other people on the other side for looking after me. What do you think about Tiki? It's okay, it's not that bad. I like it Stupid, damn.
Speaker 5But yeah listen.
Speaker 3Okay, on the social side, if you want to come to my events, follow me on Junior Unlove, which is N-T-L-O-V-U. Hull, and if you want to just follow me as a person, it's Junior Unlove. N-t-l-o-v-u. He's putting himself out there. She belongs to the streets no, I belong to the streets. I'm just a cool guy.
Speaker 1I like people onion hi, this is my first podcast. I really loved it. Um, thank you for having me. I hope I'm gonna come again, but you guys need to set your priorities straight. Look for money and don't look for a relationship if you don't love yourself. If you love yourself, then you can look for a relationship. I'm talula victoria. That's me yeah.
Speaker 2So if you've been watching this far into the show it's been almost two hours and if you've been watching this far, it makes no sense not subscribing and liking the video. Obviously, press that button, turn it from subscribe to subscribe. Turn it from subscribe to praise jesus and uh amen. If you want anything or want to add any comments or you disagree with anything that anyone said today, leave a comment. And yeah, it's been a long show. That's the end.
Speaker 5We love y'all peace.
