What makes reconciliation possible

Genesis 45: 1-8 [1 of 2 ]

It’s east to get angry and it even easier to hold a grudge and be unforgiving. It is easy to become angry when somebody has wronged you. It’s easy to be angry and even bitter. Bitterness can lead to us becoming alienated from other people. Modern day psychologists say that one of the biggest causes of anxiety is people becoming isolated from other people. Alienation produces apprehension, anxiety which then often grows into having a hostile attitude to other people which in turn leads to being even more alienated making reconciliation can become almost impossible.

So, what is it that can make reconciliation possible, even when you’re angry and bitter, unforgiving, apprehensive, or anxious? How is it possible for you to even want to be reconciled when you’re stuck in that kind of a frame of mind? 

I think the answer to that question can be found in scripture in the life of a man who experienced a hideous, horrible injustice and the way he handled it. What it says about the way he handled it, can teach us how to handle those kinds of injustices that tend to make us angry and bitter and how we can be able to manage those kinds of negative emotions.

I’m talking, of course, about Joseph in the Book of Genesis. Today we are beginning to look at Genesis Chapter 45 and looking at the basis for reconciliation that we have witnessed in these last few chapters. Before we launch out on what will probably be a couple of days spent in this chapter, let me just very briefly review what has happened up to this point. It’s very important that you understand the several chapters before this, so that you can understand what’s going on in this chapter. As you recall, Joseph had eleven brothers and when they were younger, they were jealous of him, and they decided to get rid of him. To make a rather long story short, they sold him to a of slave traders headed to Egypt and he ended up in Egypt where he became a slave. 

To make the next episode really short, once a slave, he got thrown into jail and then through some interesting turns of event, he rose from prisoner, the Prime Minister. Zero to hero in a single day, appointed to the second highest in the land of Egypt, only subject to Pharoah himself. In his early life he had a dream, and in that dream, he predicted he would rise to this sort of position, and we see in this story how it came to pass. In order to rise to this position, he had interpreted a dream Pharaoh had had which meant that there would be seven years of plenty in the land of Egypt, and after that there would be 7 years of famine. 

So sure enough, there was seven years of plenty, and it was Joseph who put in place the plan whereby they should store food during the good times to prepare for the next seven years of famine. When the famine hit, his brothers still back in Canaan were sent by their father down to Egypt to buy food and they ended up before Joseph. The same brother that had sold him into slavery, but they did not recognize Joseph because at the time, he looked like an Egyptian and he spoke through an interpreter. He was dressed in garb of the Egyptian, and the last thing they expected to see was they brother from 20+ years earlier as a high official in Egypt, and furthermore, they had concluded that years before he probably had died. Through an interesting series of events, he kept one of the brothers, in Egypt and sent the others back, and the father became very skeptical of sending anybody back to retrieve that brother because he’s afraid he might lose more of his children to slavery in Egypt, but then the famine got so severe Jacob finally said, alright, go back, and got us some food. When they come back, another long series of events take place, but the bottom line of that story is, here are these brothers, all standing before Joseph again and they don’t know who he is now.  One of them, Judah, has promised his father that he would bring. Benjamin back but Joseph has set Benjamin up for a supposed theft and now they’re standing before Joseph with the possibility of having to return without Benjamin. But then a dramatic thing happens.

Before we begin looking at Chapter 45, I want you to look at the concluding verses of Chapter 44 again. Verse 33 says, and Judah is speaking now. 

 “Now then, please let your servant remain here as my lord’s slave in place of the boy, and let the boy return with his brothers. How can I go back to my father if the boy is not with me? No! Do not let me see the misery that would come on my father.”

(Genesis 44: 33-34)

He’s already told Joseph that if the brothers go back to Canaan without Benjamin, it will kill their father. So, Judah steps up and says, I’ll tell you what. I’ll become your slave. Keep me, just send Benjamin back. I promise my father I’d get Benjamin back to him, so keep me and please send Benjamin back. Now keep in mind these are the same brothers that sold Joseph into slavery. Joseph had every right to be angry with them. It would have been natural if he had been bitter against them.  He could have been vindictive and punished them. But what Judah offered to do really got to him. Here he sees these jealous brothers who originally sold him into slavery, now they have completely demonstrated there here and in recent events their trustworthiness, and their repentance. And now, going way beyond that, one of them is willing to sacrifice himself to protect his brother. This action of Judah prompts an overwhelming response from Joseph

Then Joseph could no longer control himself before all his attendants, and he cried out, “Have everyone leave my presence!” So, there was no one with Joseph when he made himself known to his brothers. And he wept so loudly that the Egyptians heard him, and Pharaoh’s household heard about it.  Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph! Is my father still living?” But his brothers were not able to answer him, because they were terrified at his presence.

(Genesis 45: 1-3)

So, at last Joseph makes himself known to them.  It has been suggested that he probably was speaking Hebrew to them now, so that was unmistakable what he was saying and who he really was. Also, for him not only say I am Joseph, but ask, how is our father doing, would have given the game away? He knew that his father was still alive because he asked that earlier, but he brings it up again, indicating what he wants to know if he is well enough to travel so he can be reconciled with him. The brothers are dumbfounded. They thought this guy was dead years ago and here he is, unofficial. In Egypt, they just couldn’t fathom that. 

Verse three says they could not answer him, for they were terrified in his presence. The Hebrew word translated here, means disturbed, alarmed, anxious, nervous, afraid. These poor brothers were terrified, they’re standing there. Dumbfounded, but it’s much more than that they are terrified as well. They’re afraid because at this point, they know they sold this guy in the slavery, what will he do to them? They are helpless he has all the power he could have them killed on the spot and they just stood there in silence, terrified, anxious, nervous about what would come next…. Verse four 

Then Joseph said to his brothers, “Come close to me.” When they had done so, he said, “I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no ploughing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. “So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God. He made me father to Pharaoh, lord of his entire household and ruler of all Egypt. 

(Genesis 45: 4-8)

Now this is this little speech to his brothers and what he basically says is, it really wasn’t you that was behind all of this. Now what I’m about to say is very, very important. Three times in his explanation he says, “God did this”. 

Look at first five, for God sent me ahead of you to save lives”. Verse seven, But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. Verse eight. “So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God.

By the way, the use of the term “Lord of the houshold” in verse 8 is a term that means he was something like a pastoral advisor.  It’s a word which almost means he is like a parental figure, he listens to me, and I give him advice. So, a pagan king has a Hebrew believer as his spiritual/pastoral advisor… Amazing. I want you to see is that three times he said to them, it was not you, it was the Lord that was behind this.

Let me pause here and make an observation. Is Joseph bitter, is he angry? If no, why not? Why not? And the answer is the discerning hand of God was visible to him. Even though they had done something wrong to him, in fact you could call what they did evil, you could call it wickedness, you could call it horrific, yet he saw beyond that, and saw that God could use even the wickedness they committed to bring about good. That’s incredible. I would like to suggest that discerning the hand of God in human affairs is the real basis for reconciliation. 

Let me repeat, for this is important. Discerning the hand of God in what has happened in all difficult circumstances is the basis of all human reconciliation. He could forgive them, he could be reconciled to them, not because of anything they said or did or didn’t say or didn’t do. However, he could be reconciled because he understood that God could use even a wrong done to him to bring about good.

That is a profound thought, roll that around in your brain for a while. Can I say that is a very different way to look at life compared to most people, that’s an unusual way to look at life, but it’s a biblical way, it’s a spiritual way, and it’ll save you from anger and bitterness and vindictiveness. Without holding on to this perspective all you are left with if someone wrongs you is bitterness and blame, resentment and revenge. The principle is that true spiritually perceives the hand of God in the course of all events even negative ones and therefore enables us to forgive what others have done. No one who truly believes in the sovereignty of God in the affairs of everyday life can really bear a grudge or seek revenge. Joseph confronted his brothers with this reasoned truth, but he forgivingly confronted his brothers with this spiritually coherent truth.

If all you do is look at the wrongs done to you, then the natural thing to do is be angry and bitter and maybe even want to seek some kind of revenge, but if you can see beyond that and see the sovereign hand of God working in life, then you are able to seek reconciliation and forgiveness rather than vindictiveness and revenge.