S3:E2 F#CK Hustle Culture: The New Flex is Flow

This just in 😱 .... HUSTLE IS KILLING WOMEN!  (jk I'm being a bit dramatic)

But, true Queens now that to slow DOWN is to speed UP. 

Wanna watch instead of just listen, go here: https://youtu.be/7YIsXjLM97g?si=pZVrOIcgFTdrU4rz

On this episode, I invite listeners to really look at their relationship with work, productivity and success.  And I ask them to explore the importance of rest, self-acceptance, and creating boundaries in order to reclaim our time and mental health. 

• Stress and overwhelm as universal American expectations 
• The mental load of doing it all and its impact on well-being 
• Questioning productivity and its association with women's self-worth 
• The necessity of setting boundaries and saying no to others and yes to you
• Embracing rest as a new form of success 
• The importance of community support in personal journeys 
• Normalizing struggle to encourage open discussion 

Redefining success without burning out is possible, and we talk about how to achieve it. Reflecting on traditional notions of success, we highlight the importance of rest and self-care, sharing personal stories of intentionally slowing down. Prioritizing happiness over relentless productivity, we look at the new and transformative mindset of how the younger generations are not willing to work themselves to death. Join us as we honor struggles and find balance, advocating for living authentically and finding joy in the present moment.

Send this to a woman that you think is addicted to hustle culture and you want her to stop.

Transcript

Hustle Culture and Self-Care Boundaries

Speaker 1 0:08

Hello , beautiful souls , my sisters of humanity , my bitches . So it's about 9.30 on a Thursday and I normally record to my co-host I love saying that my co-host , abigail Rebecca , for the Audacity Experiment . We record every Thursday , 9 am my time in Arizona , so it's currently mountain time and obviously I'm not recording that episode . I'm recording this episode . Let me share the story as to why . Because , man , I am up against it , and not just me , but Abby and some other friends who are saying shit and sending me shit . I'm like what the fuck is going on ? Is it this Leo moon , new moon , full moon ? I don't even know what the fuck I'm saying . Is it this Leo full moon ? We just had yesterday , literally yesterday , at eight 30 something Eastern standard time . Frida Kahlo says what the fuck , motherfuckers ? That's what she says . I don't know if you know that , but I don't know how to say that in Spanish . Well , I'm just making shit up , you guys ? Obviously Obvi , all right .

Speaker 1 1:38

So here's what ended up happening . I have been in just this soupy mess of stress and overwhelm . I think I posted something on Instagram . I saw a reel of this beautiful man holding a sleeping toddler in his hands , in his arms , in bed , and the toddler's just sleeping and he is just recording this reel because his wife has been out of town for eight days and he has actually had the experience of what it looks like to be a single parent . And you know he , you know he . Why would you , why would you , criticize someone who is admitting hey , I had no idea . This is what single parents go through . Moms who stay home with kids go through right , the whole story .

Speaker 1 2:38

I watched the reel and felt validated , like you , and especially because it's one thing having it come from another single parent , another single mom . But for for it to have that , for that message to be delivered by a married man , husband , who is outright acknowledging the work that his wife does , unbeknownst to him . And the thing that he pointed out that was the hardest , the most challenging thing for him was the mental load . And he talked about the mental load and I was like , yeah , I'm going to check every once in a while just to make sure my audio's working on my mic . It is , it's beautiful , yeah , that's . That's the thing that , like you , just can't even wrap your mind around is how mentally exhausting and crushing and all-consuming it is all-consuming . And so here's this beautiful man , this beautiful husband with his beautiful baby and he's these snapshots of him throughout the eight days , throughout you know all the things that single parents do and he was acknowledging it and he was really just like . I just felt I was just , and so I reposted it with a couple of slides and I have what I'm noticing .

Speaker 1 4:08

There's a point to this and I think I'm going to name the title of this episode fucking hustle culture , right , or something about this hustle that we , we just , especially as women , we just have to stop doing it and commending it when women have 75 things on their back . That that's actually progress . What's what's ? I believe what's bigger step toward progress is for us to say no , it's for us to carve out time for our own wellbeing , is for us to put ourselves first . None of that is normal , natural , you know , acceptable . We are in this hustle culture that is killing us .

Speaker 1 5:02

So let me tell you what happened over the last , you know , week of my life , and even when Abby and I got on our , we do a , an episode like we do a jam sesh to kind of feel into like , what do we want to talk about on Thursday ? And I know the time between Tuesday and Thursday . That's a whole lot of time for things to shift , and so I'm actually going to look for my notes because I don't have them . So give me one second , I'm going to . I'm going to just put you on pause so you don't have to watch me do this . Oh man , are you glad I paused , cause that was probably like three and a half minutes of me searching for this .

Speaker 1 5:38

So when Abby and I talked on Tuesday , we thought she goes . We said let's talk about you know how do you get yourself ready for that next big leap , energetically and practically ? Because what I was explaining to her we both kind of you know it's like anything I would say we operate in the same sort of mindset . We operate in the same sort of energetic , you know alignment . Obviously we're doing this podcast together , so we believe a lot of the same things , and so we we tap , we're tapped into a lot of the same things . I'll just say it that way . And so she .

Speaker 1 6:15

I can't remember what she was feeling , but I know what I was feeling on tuesday , and what I was feeling on tuesday was I want the world to fucking stop . I want everyone to go away . I can't do this anymore . I'm up to , I'm like drowning in just everything , just everything , and everything feels horribly , um , hard , hard , and and then , and then I and I know I'm not alone . The reason why I talk about this is because I know I'm not alone and I know this is what you also deal with . Why ? Because you're listening to me . There's something about what I say that resonates with you and you're like oh yeah , I feel that same way too .

Speaker 1 7:13

We feel bad about that . We feel bad about wanting space from our kids . We feel bad about not wanting to be around anybody . We feel bad about just telling the world to fuck off , like we shouldn't do that . How dare we the audacity for us to fall apart , the audacity for us to be overwhelmed , the audacity for us to say no , to put up fucking boundaries , to say that's enough , I've , I've enough on my plate and listen , kettle pot me black calling the kettle , whatever the fuck that whole thing is .

Speaker 1 7:58

I struggle with this so much . I struggle with this so much and it's much less than it was , but it's still . It's still there . So strong , just ridiculously strong . I should do this , I should do that . I want to do , I want to do this , I want to support this cause . I want to work with these people . I want to do this volunteer . I want to work with these people , I want to do this volunteer stuff . I want to support that , I want to work with her , I want to collaborate , I want to create .

Speaker 1 8:40

And then there's , like my own personal , physical , the standpoint of am I okay ? What do I need outside of anyone else , outside of any commitment , outside of any need to fucking pay bills ? Anyone else that I'm responsible to that ? I'm committed to that . I'm in , you know that . I'm committed to that . I'm in , you know , indebted to whatever . I just press pause because my cat is scratching at the door . Like I don't want to be indebted to a cat , I'm responsible for myself , my two children , two cats , a dog and then everyone else out there in the world , right , everyone else that I'm responsible to .

Navigating Overwhelm and Imperfection

Speaker 1 9:31

So this morning , so I was saying that on Tuesday I was really bumping up against shit , like feeling so overwhelmed , and when I feel overwhelmed , I get scared . Feeling so overwhelmed and when I feel overwhelmed , I get scared . Or when I get scared , I get overwhelmed . Where I'm getting worried about money or the future , or what I'm doing or what I'm not doing , or who , who I owe money to , or what I should be doing , all the fucking things . When I'm in that space , I'm a mess . And then every little thing is like just the feather on the like . It's the feather , it's the straw that breaks the camel's back , it's the whatever the fucking analogy is , whatever the saying is , and it's real . And so by Tuesday , by Tuesday , I was like fuck it all , I'm done , I'm tapping out , I can't buy , see you later . And I feel bad . Because I feel bad , I'm conscious that I feel bad .

Speaker 1 10:42

There are certain things that are a non-negotiable for me , and not not not feeling bad , but being aware of that . I don't ever want my children to feel like they are a burden . They are not a burden . The circumstances that other people in our life chose , that , the choices that someone else in our life made , have created more work for me . Have have created me to be a full-time single parent with zero co-parenting help Fucking zero . I didn't sign up for it , I didn't want , it Wasn't my choice .

Speaker 1 11:14

And now here it is . Have I worked through all my anger ? Obviously not . It is so much better because I'm speaking , because I'm now speaking and not talking about it . I was racked with anger fury . I mean , we're talking like rip your throat out , yeah , yeah , it's the kind of anger that comes from having zero control over what's happening because of someone else's actions . That's the kind of shit that drives me nuts . Now that's my next like thing to break through . Awesome , I've a fucking laundry list , trust me .

Speaker 1 11:53

And so Tuesday I was just . I was just , you know , we , we had our planning session and Abby , I show up in a ball cap , I think , probably still my pajamas , and like haven't brushed my teeth , like . And then Abby is looking like this you know , goddess , like she always does , she's always put together , she's gorgeous . Then I have to like , look at myself . Why are you fucking ? Fuck it all , fuck it all , fuck it , I don't fucking care .

Speaker 1 12:20

So I'm like really kind of worried about Thursday . I'm worried about it Cause I'm like am I going to be ? Am I going to be okay ? And I said to her Abby , I need to know that I can show up , fucked up . I need to know that I can show up and be like I am fucking struggling because I don't want to see another perfect person on a podcast telling me what I should do to look and feel and experience more perfect when I don't . I don't feel okay , I am not okay , I am overwhelmed , I am stressed . I have gotten to my limit . Trust me , I have been stressed the entire time . I just haven't been talking about it , I just haven't been giving it like it hasn't gotten to the . You know that point of like it just shot me right over the right over the fucking cliff . So I'm worried .

Speaker 1 13:21

When I'm having my conversation with beautiful Abby sitting there in her beautiful , curly blonde hair and her fabulous , phenomenal , huge earrings , I'm like what kind of earring I'm going to try and look like I wanted to have , like this , like my earring just got caught on my hair . I mean , I wanted to try to try to have this like , like red , like bright red lipstick . I can't find any , couldn't find any . So I have to go with this brown shit that I normally do and this was just whatever it is . But I wanted this like bold tearing the house apart . Couldn't find it . This is what you get . I wanted something more like this . Huh , huh . This is great . This is good enough .

Speaker 1 14:12

So Tuesday rolls around , I get through Tuesday and let's just , let's just look a little bit . I just want to show you Cause I'm if , if this , if your experience of this is me complaining , then fuck off and don't listen to my podcast . I'm not kidding . Like I'm so tired . I'm expired in my patience and tolerance for people judging or criticizing other people for having a hard time . Like I am actually a proponent of people getting this shit out . Get it out . Do I want you to live here ? No , I don't . I don't want to live here . I don't want to live in um , overwhelmed and stress because I don't . But what I do , do I said , do , do what I do , do what I do .

Speaker 1 15:14

Practice is allowing that shit , allowing myself to be overwhelmed and stressed and at my fucking breaking point and talking about it and getting it out and having a tantrum if I fucking need to , and then coming in here and being like you can do that too . You get to fall apart . You get to fucking have a have a limit , and so I'm just going to show you real quick . Come on , this is what this is what my like . This is what my schedule looks like . This isn't a normal oops , cancel . Trying to do this . This isn't like a normal week . This is a normal week . This is a normal week . It's a lot . It's a lot . And I'm volunteering at a athletic foundation and I'm on a women's association founders , you know committee , and I'm working and I'm , you know .

Speaker 1 16:32

So yesterday rolls around . I had to get up early , take a friend to the airport , came home , sat in on a uh a meeting , on off camera , on zoom , but off camera , because I was in the middle of eating my breakfast , getting my kid ready , eat um , getting myself ready , driving her to school , all of this . I'm on a zoom call where there's screen sharing and there's I can't , I can't , I'm not seeing that on my phone , there's no . So I'm halfway there . I'm halfway there , you know , physically , and then at some point I'm like this is not how we're supposed to do this . This is not how we are supposed to do this . It isn't about more . How do I know ? Cause it fucking doesn't feel good . It fucking doesn't feel good . And there is a limit , physiological limit . There's a limit in hours of the day . There's a limit in actual physical energy , there's a limit with mental energy and space and bandwidth , because when , when , there's more and more and more than who , who or what gets canceled . You do guess what didn't happen yesterday .

Speaker 1 18:02

I got my look . It's telling me to stand up , stand up and move a little for one minute , okay , so , so I'm just going to like stand up and I'm just going to , I'm just going to stand , I'm going to do my thing , but I want you to also like talk . You know we'll , we'll talk . So , hopefully , this this up . Hey , can't you just tell that I'm up ? All right , hopefully it can tell that I'm up . Um , maybe what I can do is go like this Okay , great , and here's my thing that I'll get out of my face for a second , all right , so , so I'm standing up , here's my , the top of my office . Um , there we go . Um , and that's I need .

Speaker 1 18:45

I got this watch . I've had it forever . I reactivated it , I set it up , I downloaded all the things because I am committed to moving my body and I'm committed to . I got this watch . I've had it forever . I reactivated it , I set it up , I downloaded all the things because I am committed to moving my body and I'm committed to having feeling like myself in my body . I'm committed to getting this 30 extra pounds off of me , not because there's anything wrong with that , but none of my clothes fit because there's anything wrong with that , but none of my clothes fit these pants right here . They're these huge , like gaucho-y , like pants . They , they're , they're uncomfortable . I'm uncomfortable , okay , so maybe just give me a minute . You did it . Thanks , apple watch . Thanks , apple watch . Okay , let me get my butt down here now . I'll figure it out . Thanks , apple watch . Okay , let me get my butt down here now . I'll figure it out .

Speaker 1 19:44

Okay , and see , this is what I'm talking about , like having it be messy , having it be , I'm fucking struggling . Having it be imperfect . Why , fucking ? Because that's what life is , not a fucking robot . I'm not a robot and I don't want to be . I don't ever want to lose touch , ever from my emotional self , ever .

Speaker 1 20:06

I read somewhere a year or two ago that they're saying I don't know , I'm going to botch it . Listen , maybe what I get to get better at is coming up with , like , if I hear something , to write it down so I know what the source is . So it's actually legitimate . But fuck that . I heard something , or read something , or heard someone say something that human beings are are evolving out of emotion . I'm sorry what ? Yeah , we're evolving to not feel , as I don't know if it's not feel as many emotions , or not feel them , as I don't know what the Google it . Google it and then do this . Tell me if I'm wrong , kristen , you got it all botched up . That's not what they said . Or , oh my God , I found it . Yeah , you're right , here's what they're . Here's what they're finding said or oh my God , I found it . Yeah , you're right , here's what they're , here's what they're finding . I have two words for that Fuck that . Fuck that . That's fucking ridiculous . It's unreal . What makes us human ? Is it our ability to reason ? Maybe Is it our ability to contemplate our consciousness ? Yeah , maybe . Is there an ability to fucking feel a vast array of emotions ? Hell , yes , it is . Hell , yeah , we give up that , then we literally are robots , we are AI .

Speaker 1 21:27

This is not the point of this podcast episode . It's not the point . The point of the episode , the point of me opening my mouth today was to talk about fucking hustle culture . So talk about hustle culture . Now , here's what I'm going to do . A friend of mine sent me , she sent me a reel and this is what she wrote , literally three minutes before I went to go hit record on this podcast episode because Abby had just and I haven't even gotten there yet Abby had just said I'm overwhelmed , I'm moving , I don't know why . I scheduled to record our podcast .

Speaker 1 22:11

I'm so sorry she felt so bad . She's crying , she's like I want you to know I'm so committed . I was like all of that bullshit . We don't , we don't need to do that to ourselves . That's fucking bullshit . If anyone knows , I know and I dealt with it yesterday and I'll explain that in a second . So there's this .

Speaker 1 22:30

I'm going to see if I can just screen share this too . I'm going to see if I can screen . No , I can't . That's okay . It's not meant to be not going to do it right now , but it's this little girl and it says empowered kids grew up to be resilient adults and she basically starts out the real . She's like seven , seven , maybe eight , and she's like listen , I'm a hustler . And my friend said , although we are leaving the hustle mentality behind , the collaborate , the collaboration piece is real . Haven't listened to it yet . Maybe , if I can , I will link to it in this episode so you all can see it .

Embracing Success Without Burnout

Speaker 1 23:14

But I really encourage everyone that's listening to this to take an inventory of your life as it is in this moment , right here , right now , and I'm going to tell you the greatest thing that I struggle with is wanting to make an impact and be successful and have a really successful business , and also not burn myself out and not be unhappy , unfulfilled , burned out , stressed out , overwhelmed , while I'm fucking doing it . Because because really truly , then why are we doing it ? Because because really truly , then why are we doing it ? What's the what's the point ? What's the point of me ? Why my earrings keeps getting caught , why , why would I ? Here's what I here's what I struggle with . There has to be a better way , there has to be a way to be hugely successful , to accomplish a lot , to make a really big impact , and I don't mean success for the sake of like , oh , look at her , she's so successful . I mean , I don't do this , I do this to get paid , right and like .

Speaker 1 24:29

The reason I'm doing a podcast is because I'm like man , if I could do anything and get paid , what would it be Be podcasting ? Man , if I could do anything and get paid , what would it be ? Be podcasting , maybe podcasting . So I'm , out of my mind , committed to monetizing this podcast in a very , very aligned way , not in a way that's like I'm going to become a sponsorship whore . I'm going to sell my soul . I've never , never , sold my soul . In fact , I sometimes wish I could fucking sell my soul . Let me just sell my soul for money . Let me just do it for five years , get a bunch of money and then just start doing the things that I really want to do . Nope , can't do it . Wish I could Can't , um .

Speaker 1 25:09

So yesterday I took my friend to the airport , came home , sat in on this meeting , where and I love these women but this is such an old school mentality that I don't believe . I believe we're we . We have got to evolve out of this mentality , and a lot of it comes from and I'm just going to , I'm just going to call this out because this is what I believe it comes from this personal development , um , background comes from this personal development mentality of like you know , what does it look like to live a really authentic life , and one that where you're fully self-expressed and live from possibility ? What it looks like to me , my experience of it was a whole lot of rigor , a whole lot of uh um , structure , structure , accountability , all that , and again you can I don't know if you can tell that I'm still struggling with this because I am in the inquiry what does it look like to be successful and aligned ? What does it look like to be rich and peaceful ? What does it look like to be really making a massive difference with people and also making a massive difference with and for myself not losing myself , not burning myself out , not overgiving , not destroying relationships , like not having whatever pursuit that I'm in impact my children , impact the people that are close to me that I love . That that's the quest , that's my quest . How can I do this and not overdo this ? And so , abby girl , I just want to tell you and I want to tell everyone listening , like , really , this is not just for Abby , this is for you . I think we get to , as a , as a gender , as women , as women , we get to stop apologizing for needing to slow the fuck down , for needing to cancel on people , for needing to break commitments , because we are literally on the edge of a breakdown .

Speaker 1 27:29

That was me yesterday . Yesterday , I posted my ass up on my couch . I ate shitty ass food on purpose . We're talking ice cream , popcorn , cereal . That's all I had . Woke up with a stomach ache . Feel like shit , like I . There's a reason I don't eat like that , cause it makes me feel bad , like really not physically feel bad , like I was like , oh , but in the moment I was allowing myself to do and to do an experience and and choose whatever the fuck I wanted to in that moment , and what I wanted to in that moment was canceling all my appointments . I canceled a physical therapy appointment .

Speaker 1 28:09

I did not go to the gym and I've been really committed like like loving going to the gym , loving it , really getting back into it . I took my Apple watch off because I knew I wasn't going . I didn't want anything buzzing me . My phone was . I just was like I am done and I had to manage my own guilt for a lot of the day and I noticed that what happened was while I'm in it . I'm like fuck it . And I noticed that what happened was while I'm in it . I'm like fuck it , but fuck , it actually comes due , like at the end of the day . I'm like , oh , now I'm one day behind and I'm not prepared for this and I didn't . I didn't get this done and I'm like that's a bunch of shit , that's a bunch of shit .

Speaker 1 28:51

So I'm , I am flying in the face of hustle culture , like flying in the face of it , like stop , stop , notice where it's operating your life . Notice , where you think that the more that you do and the more that you accomplish and the more that you like , the more boxes you check off , the more badass you are . Want to know what the new flex is ? Want to know what the new flex is ? Want to know what the new hustle is ? Rest I rest like a fucking baller . I fucking decompress and give myself space . Like a fucking ninja . I'm a gangster . I fucking sitting on my ass and being lazy and even saying it is empowering to me because I have .

Speaker 1 29:44

I was raised to always be moving . I was raised to like get up , get out , go do , get up , go do . Stop being like , get up . So for me , like the guiltiest , the guiltiest pleasure I can give myself , but I'll still feel guilty . I'm still working on it . Still working on it is being lazy , doing nothing , sitting on my ass watching TV , like that is like well , the big , the bigger one is actually reading a trashy novel . But then I get into the trashy novel and I'm like my mouth is like I'm drooling and I'm just like I feel so relaxed and it's just so fun and I'm just like it's like I don't have time for that I don't have time for that . I don't have time to read a trashy novel . I got to figure out where my next fucking paycheck is coming from . I got to figure out how to keep the lights on . I got to figure out how to blow this shit up . I got to figure out blah , blah .

Speaker 1 30:42

So my message to you is how , first of all ? First of all , look at where your , where your mind is around , what your beliefs are around getting more done , and I want you to question it . I want you to question those beliefs . I mean , I really do question those beliefs . Is it better if I do more ? Is it ? Am I going to be more successful ? Here's my . I'm going to be more successful's my I'm going to be more successful the more work I do . How do I know that's not true ? Because I worked like a motherfucker .

Speaker 1 31:23

You don't see me driving a Maserati , you don't . I don't want to drive a Maserati , by the way , don't ? A nice fat Land Rover , probably , but not a Maz , nope . A nice fat land rover , probably , but not a Moz , nope . Um , I also wanted to show you what was I going to show you ? Something that . So this morning I'm in it . This morning , I'm in it from the standpoint of like , oh , almost like a hangover from yesterday . Now my goal is to be able to take the fucking day off . Take the day off , not let it , not have it get to that point where it's that bad , where I'm just like under a blanket Netflix and I don't think there's anything wrong with it . I remember I was in , I was in um network marketing , hello , test test . I was in . Yeah , that's pretty good . I was in network marketing when I had my , my fitness bootcamp .

Speaker 1 32:24

I repped a product called Isagenix and I remember one of the millionaires got up on the stage and he just like rocked it . Because he goes , everyone , I , he goes . I'm sorry guys , everyone on the stage is going to tell you that you got to really work really hard and do all these things and whatever they were they were trying to tell us about like you know just how do you , how to build a business . And he was like my motivation , my motivation for building my business is I love watching TV . My motivation for building my business is I love watching TV . And like you could hear a pin drop Cause it was like everyone out there is talking about how to get more done , how to be successful , how to crush it in your business .

Speaker 1 33:13

No one's talking about how to rest like a motherfucker . No one's talking about how to decompress like a master , like a fucking motherfucking badass baller , ninja motherfucker . No one's talking about that . Why ? Because that's not what's valued in our culture . What's valued in our culture is work your ass to the bone . It , you know , like I mean even that .

Speaker 1 33:38

There's , there was this . There was a saying I don't remember it was years ago , but it was like like just even the sleep , I'll sleep when I'm dead . You're so dumb , I'm sorry , but like I'm not sorry . And of course , I say sorry meaning I'm not fucking sorry , but like that's the dumbest shit I've ever . Like you don't . You don't sleep when you're dead , come on . So let's stop .

Speaker 1 34:04

This is the one of the main reasons why I've never overscheduled my children . I've never been like now . We got to go to violin class and then we go to soccer , and then we go to Mandarin learning Mandarin , and then you're going to go to soccer , and then we go to Mandarin , learning Mandarin , and then you're going to go to a private school . Well , granted , I've never go to private school because that's a bunch of bullshit too . Excuse me , but stop Question your fucking actions , question your beliefs .

Honoring Struggle and Finding Balance

Speaker 1 34:31

If you're exhausted , check yourself . If you're exhausted and overwhelmed and overworked and overcommitted , start saying no . I literally have a workshop , I did and like it was like all about powerful boundaries and it was all about saying no , why Cause fucking , we're not taught that shit . We're not taught that shit . Hey , put one more thing on my back here . Yeah , I got it . Yeah , oh what ? My leg's breaking off . I'll sleep when I'm dead . So , ladies , abby , you're moving , sweetheart , and I love you and everyone listening to this , take a bit , take a , take a minute , take a breath . I literally have heard myself say , say , say and believe , as if it's real . I don't have time to take a breath , bitch , what the fuck do you have time for then ? What the fuck are you prioritizing over your own literal the body that's carrying you through life ? This morning I woke up . My sister had sent me a meditation .

Speaker 1 35:56

I use insight timer . If you don't know , insight timer it's fucking amazing . Plugs to insight timer . I like it way better than calm . I like it way better than the other one too . It starts with an H . I like it way better than the other one too . It starts with an H heel . I don't know something . Um inside timer is unreal , amazing . I use the plus um paid version and I want to show you . If you don't follow Sarah Blondin , you should , and I'm hoping that I'm not um , I'm mirrored and and backwards to myself , but it's it's showing correctly anyway . Too much it's over . It's called alchemy of the heart harmonize your inner landscape . This girl had me practicing gentle kindness toward ourself .

Speaker 1 36:47

Girl , sarah Blondin , B-L-O-N-D-I-N . Sarah S-A-R-A-H . She is a poet , she is a master , she is a master with words and her voice is unreal . 2.4 million plays that's going to tell you something . 2.4 million plays since September 2016 . I love her . I have to be in a certain mood for her because she's , her voice is very lulling and I don't always want lulling , but this one hit me in my heart . I'm sobbing and it was just absolutely , I mean beautiful . So insight timer Sarah Blondin , alchemy of the heart harmonize your inner landscape . And it absolutely did . I just was like , oh my God . And here's what . Here's what she said Give yourself permission to give yourself permission to pause .

Speaker 1 37:44

Give yourself permission to give yourself permission to pause . Give yourself permission to look at like , feel the sun on your face . Give yourself permission to like for me , enjoy the laughter and bantering and even the fighting that your children are , you know , participating in right now . Why ? Because someday that's this house is going to be quiet . Someday these , these girls are not going to be here . Someday it'll just be me someday .

Speaker 1 38:14

And while I clamor for my own space right on the heels of that is I'm so grateful for my life . But I want to tell you something that I think is going to fly in the face of a lot , of , a lot of the coaching , a lot of the rhetoric that we hear is yes , grateful yes , and also honor your struggle . To honor your struggle meaning acknowledge your struggle . Yes , I am struggling right now . Can we please normalize , breakdown , normalize I'm not okay , so that you can actually be okay ?

Speaker 1 39:05

The more we deny or close off or shut down or minimize or or downplay and then up play productivity and overdoing and accomplishment and success and being a badass , stop Fucking , stop , why , why , why do I want you to stop ? Because you're exhausted and it's manifesting in your mental health , your physical wellbeing . I have 30 pounds on my body for multiple reasons , but mostly I absolutely know it's from stress of the last three years 100% . It's just me being in complete survival mode . I am not at a place in my life where things are handled . It's Maslow's hierarchy of needs right Air , food , water , shelter , and then you go up the ladder . You need to have those base needs met , and I have been struggling to get those needs met on a consistent basis . And so please , please , please , honor yourself in everything that you're experiencing . Everything that you're experiencing and I'll be posting this on YouTube and you can comment on YouTube but I just it's not a popular opinion . It's not a popular opinion .

Speaker 1 40:45

We're seeing it more . We're seeing it in the younger generations . They're like fuck that shit . First of all , the workplace is is completely transformed , because young kids are not deferring their happiness until retirement , cause they see what we're doing , and by we I mean everyone else . I haven't . I haven't done that . I haven't taken that road where I'm going to grind and , grind and grind for the majority of my life so that I can one day , hopefully at 65 .

Speaker 1 41:13

And you know what ? This is what it looks like . It looks like . It looks like starting over . It looks like having nothing . It looks like , you know , literally starting from like ashes . Starting from like ashes .

Speaker 1 41:29

I'd rather have that . I'd rather have that . I'd rather struggle every month and be true to myself and live in life and be in life than go sell myself out for a dollar or a paycheck and hope and hope that when I'm ready to retire which is also a paradigm people then when I go retire , I'm able to even enjoy it . I'm able to even enjoy it . No , I want to enjoy it now and I will say this this is me calling myself out . I get to enjoy my process . Make it happen in whatever way I have to make it happen to enjoy my process . Make it happen in whatever way I have to make it happen to enjoy my process while I'm in it . Why ? Because this is not fun Overwhelm , burnout , stress .

Speaker 1 42:19

It's not fun . It's a part of it , but it's not the . That's not the end result . All right , I love you . I really do . I love you . I love everyone who's on a journey . It's a part of it , but it's not the end result . All right , I love you . I really do , I love you . I love everyone who's on a journey and I love everyone on the planet who's on a journey back to themselves or to themselves for the first time , doing the work to get right with you . And getting right with you means getting right with every part of you god , human , physical , you in relation to other human beings . Like getting right with you means getting right with with everything in the world , including your spirit self , your physical self , your emotional self . So I love you .

Speaker 1 43:03

Send this to someone that think , send this to a friend that you think is embedded in hustle culture and you want her to stop . And if that's you and a friend has sent this to you , let me help you . I don't know how I can help you , but like , let these words in , let them marinate , let them let them in and comment , comment in the section . Wherever this is , it's going to be on YouTube . So comment in the section comment . What the fuck do YouTubers say ? Comment below I don't fucking know you guys , I don't . I'm not trying to be curated , obviously , obviously All right . Me and my bun . Me and my little baby bun . It's getting there . I'm so excited my hair is almost like long enough to be in a baby bun . It's like , right here , my sides are grown out . No more Mohawk , I can pull it back . I love it , love it , love it . All right , thanks for listening . Send this , let's spread this message because it's important and I want the madness to stop for women . See you next time .