Choosing Self Love

In today’s episode, I sit with Marcy as she discusses “Self-Love”. Marcy narrates her challenging journey to self-love, gives an in-depth understanding of the concept, and shares tools as well as other principles that can guide people towards attaining it.

Episode Key points:

[00:06] Introducing today's guest, Marcy Neumann. 

[02:16] About Marcy's background. 

[06:50] Marcy's 'it might be me' moment.

[20:00] The impact of Marcy's moment on her relationships. 

[25:50] Defining Self Love

[30:50] Reconnecting with your true self.

[44:25] Self-forgiveness, and other beliefs that affect self-love.

[54:15] About Marcy's book, "Self-Sabotage to Self-Love in 5 days".

[56:56] How to connect with Marcy.

 Resources Mentioned:

Connect: 

Find | MARCY NEUMANN

LinkedIn: Marcy Neumann

Website: www.selfloveuniversity.com / www.heartshiftcoach.com 

Find | IT MIGHT BE YOU

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Thanks for listening!

Transcript

Leah McIntosh: 0:00

Welcome to it might be you podcast. I'm your host, Leah McIntosh. I'm here to help you learn that on the other side of that pain and trauma is your transformation. There may be some limiting beliefs, negative emotions, and private struggles that have led you to having your it might be me moment, I'm here to help you learn to adapt, because we were created to be limitless. My hope is with each episode you feel more understood and willing to accept that although some of our past decisions landed us in a place of uncertainty, we're only one decision away from living our best lives. Now. Let's heal. Hey, everyone, this is Leo, welcome to another episode of it might be you. I have a guest with me on this episode. Marcy Newman, she is known as the heart shift coach, and has helped 1000s of clients, or how to identify the energies that most greatly influenced them, how to release toxic, dense energy influencing their thoughts and how to open and start living from their hearts. She teaches how to let go release and how to heart shift to allow the energy of light love and creation to flow in this transformation results in living every day, on a higher level of energy frequency. In other words, building an unshakable lasting self love that sustains sinners and keeps you coming back to your authentic self. So, how are you today? Marcy?

Marcy Neumann: 1:42

LEAH, I'm so happy to be here with you, first of all. And second of all, I'm just so excited to be able to share what my messages with your audience. And I want to thank you for really preparing this platform so that women everywhere, right and get what they need to start to reshape their lives. As you said, when you were introducing me, my focus is on self love. And what I find so often is that there's a lot of confusion about what self love is. And so what I have found and working now with 1000s of women around the world, is that self love is typically the main issue that each of us has, and how it affects us. sabotage is us from really becoming everything that we are here to become. So I'm so grateful to have this opportunity. Thank you.

Leah McIntosh: 2:45

And I thank you for coming on and sharing your it might be me moment, I'm looking forward to learning what that was for you. But before we get into that, tell us a little bit more about you like what, where are you from? Kids married? Just the logistics.

Marcy Neumann: 3:03

So yeah, thank you. So I've actually been in this field and this work for over 45 years. I started back in the early 70s as a graduate nurse, and was ordained as a spiritualist minister. So I was trained in advance on healing mediumship and channeling. And so my entire career has been kind of as a bridge or a liaison between the worlds of conventional medicine and conventional thinking. And of course, metaphysical healing, metaphysical thinking. So I've had a foot in both in both worlds, but my heart is really in the world of knowing that energy is we are energy beings is actually our first language. And so as we learn that language, we can really start to heal all the different aspects of us and bring ourselves back, we might say bring ourselves back home, back to our truth, back to all of our power, our abilities to deliver the gifts that we've come here to deliver, and to live life the way I believe we're meant to live, and that's happy and healthy and total. So my personal story is one where I was married for a long time. And I'm no longer married. And that's part of my story. Today, four children, one of them who now lives in spirit. And I have had the most interesting and adventurous life, I think that anybody could ever imagine for who was one day, a soccer mom, and the next day was starting a manufacturing company.

Leah McIntosh: 5:24

So,

Marcy Neumann: 5:25

I've had so many different experiences that actually happened, what appeared to be like in the blink of an eye. But, you know, there's this beauty in 2020 hindsight. And as I look back on my life, I can see how every step, every experience, every occurrence, really brought me to where I am today. And that's something that I hope that every single one of our people in our audience today is really going to take in. So often, Leah, and I'm sure you found this yourself, you know, there are things that happened that we just want to forget, right. And we very often are weighed down by them, they are the baggage that we carry in our lives. And what I have found, and I hope to share with everyone is how we, when we come to this place of recognition that everything is significant. Everything has affected us and giving us an opportunity to become a greater version of ourselves, we can start to embrace it all, and actually come to a place of gratitude for it. And I know it sounds lofty. I know, it sounds like maybe to some too far fetched because they're already thinking, oh my god, I'm never gonna forgive them. I'm not gonna, you know, this happened. And they're the ones who are to blame all of that stuff. And I think that life is really here to give us lots of opportunities to see things differently. So I think that's what our discussion is about. Right?

Leah McIntosh: 7:17

Is and so I think this is a good time to segue into, like, what was your, it might be the moment that kind of changed the path from you being a graduate nurse, the manufacturing, CEO, all the things to where you're at. Now,

Marcy Neumann: 7:38

back in the early seven days, I really was propelled into this incredible opportunity to bring these worlds together, right. But as time went on, I got married, I had my children. And I was living what most people would consider to be a very idealic life. I also was living a life where there were parts of me that seemed to be unacceptable. There just really wasn't a place for it. But yet, my heart was still yearning, right to experience all those things. And so what I would do is, I would take this course and that course and do this and that, but what I began to notice was that they were like little band aids, that I was putting on my spirit, and hoping that it would be enough to placate it, just be quiet, don't make so much noise. And I became masterful at living like that for a long time. But one day, we were out in Montana, at a family wedding. And I had always had this really strong affinity for the Native American. And I'm going to tell you that the minute my feet, like were planted on the ground, I started to feel this really strong connection to where I was. And that night, we went to this pre wedding party. And lo and behold, I look in the backyard. And here's an authentic tip. Where you can imagine my delight, right? And of course, you must also understand that I couldn't help myself. And I snuck out of the party as quickly as I could, so that no one knew I was gone. And I went out into the yard. And I went into the teepee and I started to feel Lee It was almost like I had come home. And I was just so at home there. And so I pull back the ceiling flap and It was as if the whole night sky just filled the teepee. I mean, I was really having this sort of cosmic and magical moment. And I decided to just lay down on the beautiful mats that were inside. And I started to think about how lucky I was. My husband and I were celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary. Our four kids had also come for the weekend, and they had presented us with a beautiful memory book filled with photos. And, you know, so many messages from our friends and family. And, as I said, we were surrounded by so many people, I also started to think about how ideal like my life was, in truth. I had everything in anything anybody could ever imagine. We lived in a very affluent neighborhood, from somebody else's eyes, truly, it would appear that I had it all. And I was marveling at this, like, how did this all happen? And I started to make an actual gratitude list. And I was seeing like how long this list was, of all the things that I was so grateful for. When all of a sudden, like a ticker tape across my mind's eye. It says, How much longer do I have to do this Lord? Well, I'm going to tell you, I bolted up, right? And I jumped out of the teepee and I vomited in the bushes. I broke out into such a sweat. And I had this deep feeling of dread. Like, what in God's name just happened? Where did that come from? And then layout, I started to experience something very familiar. And that was these feelings of being guilty. feeling shame. And I started to think to myself, who are you to think that there should be more for you? Look what you have? How could you be so ungrateful? Who are you to even believe that something more is out there? And what could it possibly be? And it was this constant barrage, right, this attack on myself, and I started to feel myself actually shrinking down. And Leah, I was so afraid to go back into that party. I was afraid that everybody would be able to see in my eyes that I was this awful person. And so ungrateful. And who did I think I was. And I noticed also over the weekend, I avoided having conversations with people. Now, I'm a very gregarious person. I love people. I love talking to everybody. But I couldn't look them in the eye. I felt so ashamed. And so finally, the weekend ended and we went back to Long Island, which is where I was living at the time. And I did my very best to, well, to do what I become very masterful a lot. And that was sweep it under the rug. So every chance I got every little question that came up or feeling I would just keep sweeping it under sweeping it under and pretended that it never happened. But it wouldn't allow it. It kept coming up and kept coming up until finally, you know, somebody had recommended to me, a woman, you know, who worked with women in transition. And the moment I heard that I just had a feeling in my body. Like, I think that's for me. And I went to see her and while it wasn't very long before what came up was that not only was I really unhappy in this perfect life, but I was also unhappy in my marriage. And in fact, everything that was the major part of my life. And how I expressed myself was really a facade. I had become so masterful at being what everybody else wanted me to be living up to their expectations, squashing down those most important parts of myself that made me who I am.

Leah McIntosh: 14:50

And

Marcy Neumann: 14:52

about one year to the day I was asking my husband for a divorce from our perfect marriage and perfect life. Needless to say, it caused a lot of pain and suffering, in my life, in his life in the lives of our children, our friends in our family, they couldn't believe it. They saw us as like a pillar, right of the community, people used to come to us for marriage advice. And here, I was saying, I'm not happy. I need something else in my life. And I had no idea what it was where all I knew was that my spirit felt like it was dying. I had, I had started to have all of these medical issues that I kept trying to just brush off as part of my aging, right? So I was 50. And it's normal, right? normal to have constant digestive problems, normal to have constant headaches, where you couldn't ever leave the house without medication, normal to have those recurring nightmares, where I would be ripping everything apart, looking for my wedding ring. Well, it wasn't normal. No. And those were panic attacks. They were not recurrent nightmares. They were panic attacks. And the most miraculous thing happened. After a very acrimonious divorce, there was a lot of anger right from those around me. I disappointed a lot of people. But when I got into my own lease my own space, and I started to ask my spirit, what it wanted. What was for my highest good, what was I here for what was my heart yearning for? Well, guess what? The universe just laid itself at my feet. And all of a sudden, I started to get all of these creative ideas about products that I needed to manufacture, about programs that I needed to create about books that I needed to write. And I dove in. And I just kept following all of the guidance that I got from the inside that I could now hear, I couldn't hear it before. I couldn't feel what was right for me, because I was so busy trying to figure out what was right for everybody else. And one day, I sprung up out of my chair, and I realized I hadn't had a headache. I hadn't needed a Tums, my back was great, my hips were fine. And I hadn't had a nightmare in a year.

Leah McIntosh: 18:09

So what I've got from what you've shared that you were just not in alignment with yourself. I was so far away from who I was, yeah, I was lost. And I know that a lot of the listeners can relate, you know, this might be the path that they're on right now. I can definitely relate to that. Being so out of alignment, that illnesses start to manifest in your body. Just time after time when people come on to share their stories, that is a major part. And that was a major part for me as well. And it's still ongoing thing I know I'm not in complete alignment. But when you do take the time out, to listen and to honor yourself. transformation, you know, instant it can instantly happen I think instantly. Yeah, you know, and I think a lot of people are fearful of being brave, does take bravery, which you did to into marriage to have, you know, people that you loved and admired. upset with you. That's That's hard. You know, that's hard. And I guess my question for the backtrack with that particular situation where some of those relationships just damaged beyond repair, or were you able to mend some of those fences? And they understand that she did it for your highest good.

Marcy Neumann: 19:54

It's such a great question, and it's an important question, Leah and I want to thank you for asking it. It's a difficult conversation. And we have to have difficult conversations. So yeah, there were relationships that never recovered. There were relationships that were based on what people needed me to be for them. And I couldn't be that any more relationships based on these parts of me that I didn't want to be involved in anymore. I didn't want to spend my time my energy doing that I was here to be in service in a completely different way. And so many of those relationships were based on my ability to show up for them. And when I realized that, it was me, I needed to start showing up for I did have some guilt and remorse. But here's what happened. What I realized was that, with each and every relationship, whether it was one that was repaired and held reestablished on a different level, or lost, every single one of them, I realized what a gift I was giving them, the gift of giving them the opportunity to also love themselves in a way that they had never done before. Because that's what I was doing. And when people saw me, and you're right, the courage that it took, walk away from nearly everything that it defined me for almost 30 years. to, to say, this is who I am, and almost like love it or leave it kind of a thing. I'll tell you what happened inside of me aside from Yeah, all those medical issues, repairing themselves. I also started to develop this new level of intimacy with myself into me see, where I really started to listen to my heart. And like I said, the messages that were coming from my higher self. And what was so apparent was that it knew exactly like what I was here for. It knew what I needed to do, and it just laid itself out in front of me. I want you to imagine, everybody, I literally was a soccer mom, PTA made that. Okay? What I did, and all of a sudden, I have a manufacturing company. I didn't even know how to send an email at the time. I had to I got an office, I had to hire someone to teach me how to email. And here's what happened. In six months, I had eight products on the market. These were all manifestation kits. I didn't know the first thing about manufacturing. I didn't know the first thing about packaging, and yet, everybody that I needed to accomplish all of this just kept coming to me coming to me coming to me, teaching me showing me what needed to be done. I was manufacturing in other parts of the world. In that six months, those eight products hit the market laya I started to win international awards, bring good products on the market. I won an award for a health and wellness program that I created that was based on self love. I mean all of these things, and it has never ever stopped. It changes form. So as I become more in alignment, and I love that you used that word, as I become more in alignment with my heart, like who I really am. And more committed to just being that because it takes commitment doesn't you does, yeah. You have to be so loyal to you. And so loyal to what you know that you're here for and what you're meant to do. That everything else kind of takes second seat that just has to And but what's happened is, here I am. I'm talking to and helping 1000s and 1000s of people all around the world.

Leah McIntosh: 25:15

Very true. And it is now I want to kind of touch on the self love. Yeah. Some of our listeners and even myself may struggle, you know, with doing that. So how do you define it? And how do you start to practice that in order to, you know, get more in alignment with with yourself?

Marcy Neumann: 25:44

Yeah, such a great question again. self love, from my perspective, is all about action. It's when we have cultivated that courage that you spoke of, when we cultivate the courage to take action that's in alignment with our true self. And I say, that's our divine self. So self love is when we come into this place of acceptance, we really do have to accept that we are divine beings. We are here to co create with this energy of love. That is, at the very core of our nature. Until we accept ourselves as Divine Will never treat ourselves as divine, will never look upon ourselves as divine, we will never accept that as a divine being. We also have a divine mission. Now their divine mission doesn't mean that you have to be like you and I talking in a podcast, right? or doing this or doing that. But it does mean that you have one, you have a unique way that you're meant to deliver love. But until you come into alignment with accepting that about yourself, how could you give it the other issue is until you accept yourself as that divine being as that love, you also won't receive it, because you'll keep like pushing it back saying, Oh, no, I'm not worthy of that. Now, I don't deserve that. You know, it's so interesting. But when I look back to when I was married, and so busy living everybody else's life, do you know, Lia that I would never let anybody take my picture. Because my sense of self was so eroded. I lost who I was, how could I be connected to it and, and allow myself to be photographed with joy. And now I live in front of the camera. Every single day, I'm in front of the camera. And it's because I have reunited with the divine within me. And I want to express that divine in every way possible. And so I am joyful in radiating it out and sharing it with every opportunity that I have. And in sharing the difference in my life that literally went from this place of really forgetting who I am. Today, this place of knowing who I am. And all the confidence and the courage and the clarity that I need

Leah McIntosh: 29:06

is mine. Right and you just touched on something big, which was you know, forgetting who you are. That is unfortunately kind of an easy thing to do, especially as a woman because you have to wear so many different hats on a daily basis. I know you know, just me personally. I wear three or four different hats on a daily basis. Now that sometimes I don't get to a moment to check in with me. Yeah, and I'll look up and I'm just completely depleted. And I'm someone who is I need what I need that quiet time to recharge my batteries and to get back in touch with me. Because if I don't it manifests itself in different ways physically. And that's when I know. Okay, I'm not, you know, I'm not honoring me. And so you know, for the ladies that may be listening right now, who can relate to that? What piece of advice would you give them? around, you know, getting back in touch, and love. Yeah, being aware of that energy.

Marcy Neumann: 30:32

Because this is so important. So we've all had these experiences, layout where we know that we're shrinking down, right? You're talking to somebody, all of a sudden, you're thinking about my hair is a mess. You know, my shirts too tight, my you know, and you're wondering what they're thinking of, or what they're thinking about what you're saying. And you're trying to anticipate what they're going to say. So you can be prepared and look like you're smart or funny, or, you know, you've got it on the ball, you're understanding everything. We've all been there. That is a moment where you have the opportunity to reclaim yourself. But I want you to just take a moment and take notice of what happens when we're doing that. You can actually feel your energy contracting. When you do that. You will notice your shoulders slump, you try to like protect yourself, because all of a sudden, you've lost your connection to yourself, and you've lost your confidence. What are some of the other symptoms you are your mind is racing, okay, it's trying to figure out how you can look your best to make that other person better or impressed. Or you start to convince yourself that what that other person might be saying is more important than what you have to say. Or you find yourself changing your mind about something, because you're embarrassed to give your opinion. So you just go along with them. somebody asks you, oh, what would you like? Would you like this, that you would like that and you say, oh, doesn't matter, you just pick one for me. Never. When we start to come into the self love journey, it requires an awareness about when you are throwing yourself under the bus. When you are abdicating your power, giving it to somebody else, when you are seeing yourself less than someone else. Or when you find that you're stretching too far. To live up to what you think their expectation of you is. Okay, this is symptomatic of a separation between you your truth, your true self, and your conscious mind. Now your conscious mind, okay, is 97% controlled by the ego that's always fearful. And it always has the message that you're not enough. You're not valuable, you're not worthy and definitely not lovable. Yeah. Okay. So whenever those thoughts come up, you have a choice. You can either believe that, or you can say, there goes my ego, again. Feel the difference. This is that you can just accept that whenever you're hearing those voices, it is the ego. And it's fearful because it's like this tiny little child that's so afraid that it's not going to be loved. And worse, it's afraid that it's going to be abandoned. And so what it does is it tries to prevent you from being exposed as not enough. So it has all those voices that come forward. So you have to accept that your higher self would never say those things to you. They would say you are a magnificent, magnificent child of God. You are divine. Look at you, you're amazing. You've been created to do all these wonderful things. And it would say to you, follow me, just follow me. Your ego wants you to go hide behind the couch. You're not enough, you're not smart enough, you're not pretty enough, you're not funny enough, you're not lovable enough. So we start to differentiate between those two voices. And we choose which one we're going to listen to.

Leah McIntosh: 35:34

And that can be a daunting task. Sometimes, because I still catch myself sometimes saying, or focusing on things that I don't want instead of things that I do want, right? But now I'm able to catch myself and realize, oh, let's reframe that. And this is what I want. And I'm not gonna worry about what I don't want anymore, that that makes no sense. I'm not going to manifest anything, if I'm focused on the wrong thing. So with that, you know, when people catch themselves or when the ladies that are listening, catch themselves operating from a place of ego? What is one of your go to thoughts to kind of smack, smack that self talk down that negative top now?

Marcy Neumann: 36:25

Yeah, so number one, I just have to make a comment that that was such a brilliant description, really, of what happens, Leah. And I also want our listeners to know that every single one of us experiences this, I'm a self love expert, I still get stuck in those spots sometimes, until I realize, right. So I want you to know that that's not your fault. That's really important. We are conditioned to think like this, and conditioned to respond to the egos fear based thoughts. So here's what I do. Number one, because I believe that love is all there is. I love my ego. If love is all there is, it just doesn't know that it's love. And so here's how I look at it. I look at it as actually a path. It's almost like a map for healing for me. So when I catch the ego, and it's business, I know what doesn't realize what it's doing. But it's showing me Leah, where I'm out of alignment. And I send it some love, and I send it some gratitude. So then I get this image, right of this ego, you know, expecting to be like, bombarded and, and, you know, thrown away and tossed out the door. And I see it with this expression of surprise. Oh, she's sending me love. And I realize isn't that what it was looking for all along. It was just afraid that it wasn't there for it. And so on my days when I feel the lowest, I love myself the most. I do whatever I can do to nourish and nurture myself, and also my ego. And I know that it's giving me these messages, it doesn't know what is right, because it's so stuck in its fear. It's in this dense cloud, it doesn't see itself. But I truly do believe that love is all there is. And I believe that the love that created me that divine love, created all things in that. And so my job is to find out how to love more. Now, it doesn't mean that I have to accept what it's telling me is truth. It just means that I can pivot, I can shine my heart in a different direction towards my higher self, that will remind me who I really am. And so that's my job. But you know, that journey of intimacy that we spoke of layer, that's how we find that information. You have to go through that journey of finding new and what will bring you back into alignment because it's different for each of us. We've all had these different traumas and different experiences. And so we have to understand what's going to bring us back One of the things that I have found is the fastest way I know to like So from my perspective, it would be raise our frequency, right raise our energy field, bring more light into it, is what I call becoming a love detective. And I say that each and every one of us should be carrying a tiny little notepad or journal, and you become a detective, you pay attention to all the things that pop up in your life that make you smile, that maybe make you feel soft, where you realize you can take a deep breath, maybe it has your foot tapping, maybe it has you wanting to sing, maybe it has you. You know, your imagination going off, and you're dreaming about wonderful things, whatever it is, you write it down. And every night, you read through that list, I guarantee you, if you do that, for 30 days, you're going to be living a completely different life. Why? Because we know that energy is always seeking out other energy just like itself. That's the basic tenants of the law of attraction. So if you are putting your focus on looking for all the things that make your heart sing, guess what? The universe is going to respond to you over and over and over again. And you're going to be singing at the top of your lungs.

Leah McIntosh: 41:35

I love that idea. And it's great. Yeah, it's just something else to say another little tool you can use to really get in. That's right, you know, get alignment with you and really figure it out, especially if you struggle with that finding what really brings me joy. Yeah, I think many people really sit and ask themselves that question either.

Marcy Neumann: 42:01

I think you're right. And sometimes it's hard to even get through all the jumble to do that. But if you just start to pay attention to how you feel, like I know for myself, and I often say this, one of the things that I know, like just makes my heart burst open. And this is such a simple thing is when I'm driving down the road, and I see the light kind of streaming through the clouds, or streaming through the trees in a certain way, I know that it like I catch my breath. It's like, so beautiful. Or I'll pass something that really is, you know, beautiful. It could be flowers, it could be just something that catches my attention, and seeing the beauty that's all around us. overhearing a conversation between two kids, you'll laugh yourself silly, you know, right. And I believe these are all messages from our higher self that are meant to feed us to keep us in that vibrational frequency of love. Because love is all there is. And sometimes we just forget that.

Leah McIntosh: 43:21

Yeah, we do, we really do. And we really tend to forget to love ourselves. Yes, one of my big things, one of the pillars of this whole podcast, really, when I started it was self forgiveness. Learning is huge. And to me, self love goes hand in hand with it. It can be hard, a hard pressed journey for you to get to that place. But when you do, the piece that you have, is amazing. And it vibrates. You know you like you said, your energy towards people and around people they'll be able to tell, I look at who I was just 30 days ago, compared to who I am now. And I'm a completely different person. And a lot of that just has to do with asking myself the hard questions. Especially what brings me joy.

Marcy Neumann: 44:24

Yeah. Yeah. And you know, you bring up such a wonderful point. I also believe that self forgiveness and self love are like a marriage made in heaven. And I believe that one of the greatest aspects of self love is to learn self forgiveness. And it is the path to a freedom that we can't even imagine. I mean, it's just it's like this weight of the world is lifted off of us. And when we realize that it's how we're meant to live, we're not meant to be carrying that weight, we are meant to be joyful. So it's our responsibility to find out how to let go of that baggage that wait. It's always based on some false belief about ourselves, always 100%. So we have to find out what that is, and let it go. I do a tremendous amount of work with that with my clients, because I have never found anyone who wasn't held back in some way, by a false belief that they had about themselves. And I know for myself, it constantly comes up and I have to address it. And so you know, if you're experiencing any guilt, and shame, any remorse, that's a call for self forgiveness, you've got to let it go. You have to find out how to do that. The other thing too, with self love layer, and tell me if you'll find this too. And that is that so often, you know, people are caught up with this belief that it's selfish. Right? self love, Oh, there she goes. Again, she's so selfish. In a while she thinks about his herself. All of that. Well. That is a childish belief system that's been perpetuated by people who don't want you to change. They like the fact they liked that I was living for them, to make them happy to do everything the way they wanted, and that I was who they needed me to be. And that's exactly what's going on when someone else calls you selfish. There are times in this self love journey when we actually are creating a new lifestyle, where it may appear to be selfish. But when you accept yourself as a divine being, and it requires your commitment to be that you'll never call it selfish again. You will call it for what it is loving yourself, as you were meant to be loved, as you are loved by your divine creator. You see, in the eyes of God, there is not one person who's greater or lesser than the other. There's not one that's more important. But what is important is that each and every one of us become self actualized. So that we can be of our greatest service, to love and create the world that we all want to live in. And we deserve to live in. Because we are magnificent child, children of the universe. And we're loved. We're cherished beyond our measure. And so if I love and cherish myself, I finally can love and cherish you.

Leah McIntosh: 48:31

And that's exactly what I was gonna say now, can you truly love someone? If you don't love you? That's right. Just like with me, you know, I swore up and down that I forgave people for the trauma and all the things that happened to me in my past. But yet in steel for decades, I woke up daily with a vise grip around my heart. And I just got so good at ignoring it. I wanted to get rid of it. I tried so many different things. But it wasn't until I learn how to eliminate those negative emotions around those situations that I finally got the piece that I wanted, and I start feeling that heaviness in my soul. And God kept telling me for over a year you'll find your freedom in forgiveness. You'll find it you'll find it and I finally listened. And it wasn't just forgiving everybody else. I forgot to forgive me one time to apply that to myself. Everything else followed.

Marcy Neumann: 49:58

You are 100 percent right on, always that must begin with us. And then everything else just falls into place. You're so right. Very wise.

Leah McIntosh: 50:12

It worked took a long decades of not understanding, you know, you know, just accepting it. But I knew it wasn't. Leah, you know, Lee as high as really as high as good. And I couldn't continue to go through that pain daily. I got really good plaster and on my little cheerleader smile, and, and being humorous and making jokes. Yeah, you know? Yeah. No one knew the private struggle. No one not even my husband. Yeah. And so, you know, once I got that, I haven't looked back. And I just, you know, I have to say, I'm a believer in God. And you know, so I know that. If he took me down that path, that Oh, you've been looking everywhere else when it was really within you, you wouldn't just look with them. I would have healed you a long time ago. You know, it's right then. So. So right. Yeah, you know, and it was a learning experience, but it was so worth it. Yeah.

Marcy Neumann: 51:28

And I just have to say one thing, Leah, I have to say to you, that wasn't your fault. Because you know, what? We're all taught from the minute were these tiny little things, we must forgive, forgive them, forgive them, you know, don't hurt their feelings, this and that. Right? forgive forgive everybody else is more important. I even have, like, you know, images in my mind of like, my grandmother's finger, forgive your brother, you know where you're going to go to hell, right? Yes. But nobody tells you how to do it. No. nobody teaches. How do you forgive? And that's why this work is so important. Exactly. Yeah. And it is it's, it's that marriage, that hand in hand journey, self love, self forgiveness. And it all really just revolves around letting go of any false beliefs that you have about yourself. And any false beliefs that, that God within you would ever abandon, you

Leah McIntosh: 52:39

know, massive body. Yeah, it's not always there. You just have to be quiet. And listen, and listen to that inner voice, because that's him talking to you. That's. So this has been an amazing, amazing episode. And you've already given so much advice, but I do want to bring up your book. Okay, great, so that the ladies listening, they want to learn more from you. They can so what's the name of your book? And how can they find it?

Marcy Neumann: 53:20

Okay. So, the name of my book is self sabotage, to self love in five days, filled with lots of tools. But most importantly, what I do is I teach you how to identify the energy of self sabotage. Once you learn to discern that you can then learn which energies to pivot towards, that will take you to self love. And it is, I have to say myself, it is an absolutely beautiful book. And it is written to help you to shift your heart. self love, is the method that actually shifts the energy of the heart. It gives us access to that God within what happens with all the trauma, the experiences of our life, the dense energy like the residue, right of those experiences kind of hovers around our heart and you said it best. You lived with that vise on your heart. You thought that was normal. It's not. So because we are energy beings, we have to shift that energy. self love is the method of raising the vibrational frequency of that energy by bringing more light In so that we can align with that God within us. Amazing. And that's in the book. And it's a wonderful beginning to that journey of into me see intimacy, letting go of the self sabotage and letting in the self love. And it's free By the way, I want everyone to know it is absolutely free. And it's for you.

Leah McIntosh: 55:33

Awesome. And I will make sure I include the link to her book in the description so you can get your copy. Thank you.

Marcy Neumann: 55:43

And the only other thing I want to say, if you are looking to connect with me, you can do so at my main website, which is heart shift coach.com and the my other website is self love. university.com so they're both dot coms, and they are there to lead you into your own journey of freedom.

Leah McIntosh: 56:13

Awesome. Well, I want to thank you for coming on and and share your it might be me moment and, and all your wisdom because it was amazing to think about as well. And so thank you for coming on and sharing.

Marcy Neumann: 56:31

It's my joy, my honor. And again, I want to thank you for providing this platform for sharing, because we're all in this together.

Leah McIntosh: 56:39

Yes, we are. And love this Authorize. Thank you. Okay guys. Well, thank you for listening to another episode. I will talk to you next week. Thank you for listening to another episode of it might be you. Please tune in each Thursday for new releases, then make sure to subscribe, share and review. If you enjoyed this episode. You can find me on Instagram at Perry thinker Inc. and as always remember to allow yourself the space for grace and give yourself the gift of self forgiveness.