The Illusion of External Peace: Why Avoidance Isn’t the Answer

Time to hit block on those annoying people?

You've probably been there at some point... wanting to hit "block" on someone or something that annoys you!

Maybe it’s a person on social media, a challenging friendship, or even an unfulfilling job and you believe that eliminating these annoyances will bring you peace. But will it really?

Whilst it may seem like the obvious thing to do, blocking or discarding things we don’t like might not be the best solution.

While it’s true that your environment - including who with, where and how you spend your time - plays a crucial role in your support and growth, simply blocking out the things that bug you without addressing the underlying issues won’t bring lasting peace.

The external world is a reflection of your inner state, and those unresolved triggers will follow you wherever you go.

In this episode, I share why it's important to face and resolve these triggers head-on.

Taking responsibility for your internal state is the inner work, and when you do that, you’ll find that your external circumstances start to change as well.

Creating change begins with creating the life you want from where you are right now, rather than waiting for external changes to make you feel differently.

Although they don't always feel like it, the challenges and triggers we face are actually gifts. They reveal where we need to release resistance and align more closely with our true desires. By mastering our emotions and beliefs, we can navigate any circumstance without being thrown off course.

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Transcript

Sian 0:26

Hey and welcome to the Vibrant Mind Vibrant Life podcast. for those of you who are new here, hello! I'm Sian, I'm your host. I love and share all things mindset, emotions, and more recently breathwork as well. So anything that is going to support you in creating the life that you want and getting out of your own way, because everything you want, you already have access to. when you believe that it is possible. so let's dive into today's topic then. Oh, and sorry, I didn't welcome those of you that aren't new here. So for those of you that come here regularly, hello to you too, and welcome back. So today's topic is all about when something annoys you and you decide that you're going to discard it from your experience. You're going to hit block, metaphorically, or maybe even literally, on the thing that you don't like. So to use a real life example of this, let's say there's somebody on social media that you don't like and so you decide to hit block to negate them from your experience. It could be that you decide to step away from a friendship because you don't like them. the way they behave, or you, you leave a job because you don't like the, the way that the, the company runs, or the people that you work with. Whatever it might be, there's something in your life that is annoying you, that you, you don't like, you don't want to experience anymore, so you metaphorically or physically hit block. Now, the reason that I want to talk about this, and the reason that it's important, is because there can be a lot of encouragement to almost eliminate anything out of your life that isn't serving you. To get rid of it, to close the door on it, to step away from those people. And whilst I'm a big believer that your environment is fundamental to your support, to your growth, to the kind of results that you can produce. I also believe that if your environment isn't what you want and you just block it without dealing with what it is that you didn't like about it, then it is going to follow you wherever you go. Think about it. You, your energy, your beliefs, they all go with you. So it. They are going to find you wherever you are because the external isn't real. The external is a reflection of you. So thinking that I'm going to step away from this or I'm even maybe going to hide away. Maybe you found yourself thinking, I just want to hide away to get some solitude. I just want to, I'm going to go looking for peace outside of me. I'm going to go live in In the jungle. In nature. I'm just gonna find my own place where I don't have to see anybody or anything. So I can curl into a ball and then nothing will impact me. Well, that is never gonna be the case. Because the things that irritate you, the things that you don't like, They're not outside of you, they are within you. And the triggers that you experience aren't going to disappear just by removing them from your life. The only way that they won't trigger you anymore is if you actually face them head on and you resolve them. Now you only have to think back to times in your life, and I'm sure that everybody has had an experience like this, where you leave a situation, a circumstance, a friendship, only to find the very same thing in the next breath. And that is because you have taken yourself with you. Nothing changed internally. So the external reflected different faces, different places, same feelings, same emotional responses to the external world. And in fact, it can reinforce any beliefs that you may have that aren't serving you.'cause it's like, hang on a minute, I thought that I, if I did this, if I achieved this thing, if I left this person, then I would feel differently and I don't. So now I. Really feel empty. Now I really feel like a failure or now I know I'm not good enough because I've even got this thing and it still doesn't feel good. The key to really creating change, to really stepping into that new embodied version of you, is about creating what you want, whatever your situation, whatever circumstances you're in right now, create it from where you are. If you wait for things to change, you're always going to be waiting and you'll probably always be disappointed when you get there. The triggers that you experience, they are showing up for you. They are revealing to you what it is that you need to release. What is the resistance to life that you're experiencing? Where are you not free or in alignment with your very desires? Where is it that you need to break through? They are the gifts. This is the work. This is where the emotional mastery comes in. It's about being able to navigate whatever circumstance you're in without it rocking the boat, without suddenly going down the rabbit hole of catastrophizing everything. Because if you really truly hold the belief that everything is working out, and you can handle whatever comes at you, then it doesn't matter what the world presents to you, And, you know, it's life, we have challenges, the challenges are there to support us in our next level of growth, being able to navigate your emotions, that is what's within your neurology. as in your nervous system, your beliefs, they are what cause you to see the world in the way that you do. So if you're coming up against a challenge and the thought that comes to mind is, I can never overcome this, I'm never going to be able to do it, that is presenting to you, that is bringing from your unconscious into your conscious awareness the very things that you need to resolve to be able to break through that, to be able to overcome it, to align with what it is that you desire. and when you are stable, your reflection changes, So you can use it as a tool to check in with yourself, you know, asking yourself, what must I believe to be true? For this to be my experience of reality. And that is the work. This isn't about brushing stuff under the carpet, pretending that it doesn't exist, because it won't go anywhere. And if anything, it's only going to get louder. So instead of maybe putting a plaster on things and focusing on the opposite and pretending that it's all okay, when really the undercurrent, the undertone, is your unconscious mind is saying, uh uh, no it's not. Instead, give yourself permission, be willing to go there to lift the carpet up and see what it is that needs to heal. So instead of me deleting these people out of my experience only for them to show up again, it's like, what is it that I need to learn? What is the lesson within this? What is it about me that attracts these people? And if you deal with that, then you'll find that you no longer attract those people anyway, or if it is the same people, you get a different version of them. You know, everybody has a different version, a different interpretation of the same person. Some people will say they're wonderful, other people will say they're so mean. And it's like, is the person different or is it our interpretation, which is the lens that we see them through, which are the attributes, the qualities, the personality that we're then aware of. And also, are those the parts that they're sharing with us? Because that's what we're a match for. So this works both ways, and the key is that the power is within you. You're the only one that can do anything to change that, which is empowering, because you're the only one that you have any control over anyway. So trying to control the external is never gonna work. You may as well focus on what you can do, which is the inner work, with you. So whilst this is a short one, maybe it's an opportunity to pause for a minute and check in on your own life. Are there things that I am pretending don't exist, or am I removing things, people, situations, thinking that they'll go away without resolving what created them in the first place? Now if you want to start doing the inner work if you want to begin releasing that resistance Letting go of the friction in life The things that keep rubbing up against you that stop you from being in alignment with what it is that you truly want Then you are welcome to come and join me this Wednesday online. It's 8pm UK time, so it's available for all time zones for a Breakthrough Breathwork Session. Now the Breakthrough Breathwork Session is really powerful. This isn't just working with the breath, it's also working with the beliefs that you hold and using it as a tool to release any negative beliefs, any limiting beliefs and install new empowering ones. Using the body to create that change. If you can make it live, that is amazing. If not, that's okay. I can send you the replay and I will also send you some questions in advance to make it personal to you. So whilst this is a group session, it's still going to be personal to you. And it's something that you can come back to again as you continue to evolve. Now, this is the most exciting bit. This session is only 10 And it is a one time offer. so if you're curious, if you want to experience it, then get it at this price whilst you can. Breathwork has been transformational for me and I use a lot of mental and emotional release tools. The wonderful thing about it is that it's tapping into the body's knowledge. Every memory, every belief, every emotion that we've ever felt is stored on a cellular level. The body holds onto it. So using the breath, you can release some of that stuff. Maybe things that you don't even know are present. And the experience in and of itself is mind blowing. You know, the, the sensations that you go through, the, the shakes, the tingles, the emotional release, the crying, the, the laughing, it's all welcome. It's a safe space. I'll be supporting you through the whole thing. So if you want to join me, Click on the link in the show notes, say this Wednesday the 12th of August. So there's only a couple of days to sign up. Any questions, let me know. Otherwise, I will see you next time.