Your Unconscious Patterns Are Costing You

I couldn't risk waiting and losing the inspiration, so this week's podcast was recorded from my car!

I had something important to say and I didn't want to wait... not after what I recently discovered.

I've been running an unconscious pattern of hesitation and it's been costing me!

In this week's podcast, I share a personal story about how I recently missed out on a fantastic opportunity because of this pattern of hesitation I didn't know I had, and how a simple moment in a Brighton coffee shop brought this pattern into sharp focus for me.

These patterns often run on autopilot, influencing our thoughts, feelings and actions without us even realising it. But once we bring them into our conscious awareness, we have the power to change them.

I offer practical tips on how to start identifying these patterns in your own life. 

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Transcript

0:01

Welcome to the Vibrant Mind, Vibrant Life podcast. I'm your host, Sian Hill. My mission is to help you become the best version of yourself and live a life you truly love. I'll be sharing with you inspiration and practical tips on how you can use your mind to unlock your potential and become the vibrant person you were born to be.

Sian 0:26

Hey, hey, and welcome to the Vibrant Mind Vibrant Life podcast. Now, today's episode is actually being recorded from my car. So apologies if the sound quality isn't great, but inspiration hit and I thought I'm going to jump on it while it's fresh and I'm raring to go. So, let's dive on in then while it's fresh. Now the thing that I want to talk about, which I've spoken about previously, is patterns of behaviour and starting to recognise your own. And the reason I'm sharing about this is because it was brought into my conscious awareness only the other week, a pattern that I have that I was completely oblivious to. And it came about in a couple of different ways over the space of a few days. So firstly, what do I mean by patterns then? Well, as people, we have patterns. You may have heard the saying, what we do in one area, we do in all areas. So we take ourselves with us wherever we go. So, it may be that you have a pattern of procrastination and you keep putting things off until the eleventh hour. Maybe you have a pattern of self sabotage. Maybe you have a pattern of things needing to fall to pieces before you get up and go and go and fix them. And the patterns that we run, the behaviours, the thoughts, the feelings, the actions that we take, they tend to go across multiple areas of life. so it may be that they're more obvious in one area than another, yet you can usually find themes or similarities. So that's a very brief overview of a pattern, and our patterns are usually unconscious to us. So they run on autopilot, in the background, and because they're so unconscious to us, we don't even realize that we're doing them. Now, from the outside, looking in, it can be easy to see other people's patterns. This is why it's so valuable working with a coach, because a coach has a different perspective. And by bringing them from your unconscious into your conscious awareness, you then have the opportunity to change them. And awareness is key. If you don't know something exists, how can you possibly change it? Now, the pattern that was brought into my awareness became evident in a couple of different scenarios. So let me tell you the first experience. There was a contract that had come into my awareness for some work that I would like to have done. It was work I enjoy. It was something that I'm really good at and the pay was really good. I saw the contract and I saw the closing date for when they were making a decision. end of the day and I'd had a pretty long day So my immediate thought was, I'll get all the information together right now, And send it off, and then it's done and dusted, whilst it's front of mind, And I can go to bed happy. And I put it all together, I even recorded a video. I thought I'm going to record a video of myself doing the thing that it is that they're asking so that I can show them that I'm able to deliver. I did it all. I packaged it all together and I thought, do you know what? I look a bit tired. I'll sleep on it. I'll probably do a new video in the morning and I went to bed and that was that. So I woke up in the morning, fresh faced. I had a client call first thing in the morning, so by the time I'd actually recorded the video and uploaded it, it was knocking on for kind of midday lunchtime. By that point, I was feeling pretty hungry, so while it was uploading, I thought I'll go and have my lunch. It will have uploaded by the time I'm back, and then I can send it over. And I did that. So by the time I actually got the video off, it was about, I don't know, 2 o'clock, something like that. Anyway, about an hour or so later, I received a reply. Which said, I would have been perfect for the job, but the deadline had been brought forward, they had to make a decision quickly, and they'd given somebody else the job a couple of hours before. So I missed that job by a couple of hours. Had I have sent it the night before, when I felt inspired to actually do it, the job would have been mine. So that was the first indication. Then, roll forward to last weekend. My partner Dan and I went to Brighton for a few days. When we arrived we headed into a lovely coffee shop. If you haven't been to Brighton there's so many nice places to eat, it's fabulous. And anyway we went into this coffee shop and there were a lovely huge A pair of seats. A pair of seats? I don't know if that's what you call them. Anyway, there were some seats in the window, overlooking the, the view. Really comfortable. They were really nice. We went to the coffee counter to decide what cakes we were gonna have. And I saw these chairs and I went to walk towards them, to go put my bag on them and sit down and instead I hesitated about 10 seconds later somebody else came in and went straight over to the seats and sat down Dan said to me a throwaway comment, which really landed and that was if you hesitate you lose out and BAM it was like lesson the That's what I did That's what I've been doing and I recognized a few times lately where I've hesitated Where I've maybe waited a moment before doing the thing and then it's ended up costing me Now, the reason that I think I became consciously aware of it this time is because it was more painful. this job would have paid me well. So to know that my hesitation was the reason I didn't get it, it stung a little bit more than it usually would. And although the coffee seats were neither here nor there, it was where I wanted to sit. It would have been a really lovely place, and instead we sat on the wooden chairs out the back, which was still very lovely, yet that would have made the experience, and I thought, oh my gosh, how many other times have I hesitated and maybe missed out on what it is that I really wanted? So, something to think about. I invite you to consider this in your life. Where are you maybe running the same patterns without recognising it? Even though the signs are all there, you're not seeing them. If you're working with a coach that knows how to uncover those patterns, to bring them into your awareness, and then also help you to resolve them, that's great, you've got the support. Otherwise, if you're doing it solo, You can absolutely do it. It will probably take a lot longer. Let's be real. As much as I want to say, you can do all of this stuff by yourself. It helps to have support. It helps to have that mirror being reflected back to you. Now the way that you can approach that is something as simple as at the end of each day, or maybe even if you have the opportunity a couple of times a day. Stop and look back at your day so far. So what are the events that occurred? What are your thoughts? What are the things that preceded it? And then just look for themes. Are there similarities throughout the day? So you can begin to bring into your conscious awareness what is currently unconscious. Now, if you want to dive even deeper than that, if you want to get into the, not just the unconscious stuff that's at the surface level, that only takes a bit of probing to bring it up into your awareness, but the even deeper stuff than that, the stuff that you've maybe repressed Because you think they're not okay to be there. You don't want to acknowledge them, and so they're hidden out of sight, yet they are the things that have the most control over your life. So if you are ready. To dive deep into the depths of your unconscious mind and in a safe and supported environment, bring that stuff up to the surface so that you can heal it. And only as much as you're ready to heal. Your unconscious mind, its main function is to protect you, so it's only ever going to give you what you're ready for. And then working with me, holding that space for you, taking you through processes to integrate all aspects of you, release any from the past that are driving your behavior today so that you can start living from a place of empowerment rather than living from a place of disempowerment where your present day and your future is determined by the events that have already happened. You can take back your power. You can step into your true power, into your authentic you and begin to live from a place of empowerment where you are in the driving seat. You are an embodiment of the change that you are creating in your life because until you embody it, until you have the space within your nervous system, until you have the capacity to receive what it is that you want, you're always going to push it away. And that is what my upcoming Reflective Alchemy programme is all about. And this is the beta round. So this is only 397. For 12 weeks of coaching with me. And I'm also offering payment plans. So if you want to spread out the payments, you can do that as well. This is a one time offer. This is only going to be for this group programme. So if you want to be part of the founding members who will really be part of bringing this program to life, I know what it is that I want to deliver and I also want your feedback to tell me what it is you want more of, what is the support that is going to help you the most to create that expansion within so you can go into the world with the tools to continually work on yourself, to continually up level and create what it is that you want from a place of empowerment. So this isn't about becoming reliant on me as a coach. This is about me sharing with you the way that you can do that yourself time and time again. Now I wanna mention here the one-to-one coaching that I do with people, the, the breakthrough coaching, the alignment activator that I offer, that is an intensive program, and it comes with a higher price ticket that is going in really deep fast to get dramatic transformation quickly, and supporting you over the months that follow to integrate that. So those are the. Big, big shifts. The Reflective Alchemy Program, you are going to have some transformational shifts, trust me. we're going to be doing breakthrough breath work, we're going to be doing some really powerful hypnosis, we're going to be doing an abundance alchemy to to essentially turn rubbish into gold. so there will be some really powerful transformations. And this is about being in it for the long game. This is about learning how to use the reflections of the world outside of you, how to use the world as a mirror to get feedback, to know what it is that you need to work on, to be able to break through, to be able to up level. And that is a continual process So this is about building on things over time. Having those small changes day by day, that compound to the big things. So I'm not gonna pretend to you that if you come and join this program, you'll be making a hundred K by the end of the 12 weeks, you might. may well be doing that, yet that's not what it's about. It's about expanding your capacity, so if that is your desire, you'll know the route to get there. If you want to come and join me, there are only ten seats available, and some have already been taken, so drop me a DM, head to the link in the show notes to find out more, And in the meantime, have a fabulous week. I'll see you soon.