Health, Fitness & Personal Growth Tips for Women in Midlife: Asking for a Friend

Ep.185 Loneliness Is the New Smoking: Why Midlife Women Need Strength & Community

• Michele Henning Folan • Episode 185

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Midlife can feel like a perfect storm—menopause, stubborn weight gain, bone loss, shifting identities, and an unexpected rise in loneliness. In today’s episode of Asking for a Friend, we’re digging into one of the most overlooked drivers of women’s health in their 40s, 50s, and 60s: disconnection—and why rebuilding community may be as powerful as lifting heavy or optimizing your hormones.

My guest, Terry Tateossian, is a Harvard-trained, ISSA-certified personal trainer, nutritionist, emotional-eating coach, hormone specialist, and founder of THOR: The House of Rose Retreats, where hundreds of midlife women have transformed not just their bodies—but their confidence, connection, and sense of purpose.

We talk about:

  • Why loneliness is the new smoking for women in midlife
  • How community improves metabolic health, adherence, motivation, and emotional resilience
  • Terry’s personal transformation from obesity, burnout, and hospitalizations to becoming a leader in women's wellness
  • The recurring struggles she sees in midlife women—under-eating protein, chronic dieting, hormone confusion, and the pressure to stay small
  • How retreats create safety, belonging, and joy—often sparking lifelong friendships
  • The smallest, simplest steps you can take today to feel less alone
  • Why lifestyle foundations matter more than ever—protein, strength training, stress reduction, and nervous system regulation

If you’ve been feeling isolated, stuck, or unsure how to reconnect with the adventurous, vibrant woman you used to be, this conversation is going to speak straight to you.

You can find Terry Tateossian at:

https://www.thehouseofrose.com/womens-wellness-retreats/

https://www.instagram.com/thor.wellness/

 https://www.instagram.com/how.good.can.it.get/

_________________________________________
1:1 health and nutrition coaching or Faster Way - Reach me anytime at mailto:mfolanfasterway@gmail.com

If you’re doing “all the right things” and still feel stuck, it may be time to look deeper. I’ve partnered with EllieMD, a trusted telehealth platform offering modern solutions for women in midlife—including micro-dosed GLP-1 peptide therapy—to support metabolic health and longevity.

https://elliemd.com/michelefolan - Create a free account to view all products.

✨ Sign up for my weekly newsletter:
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🎤 In addition to coaching, I speak to women’s groups, moderate health panel discussions, and bring experts together for real, evidence-based conversations about midlife health.

Transcripts are created with AI and may not be perfectly accurate.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of medicine, nursing, or other professional healthcare services. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified healthcare provider with any questions regarding a medical condition.

Michele Folan:

The new year is coming, so let me ask you something. Are your goals the same ones you made last year and maybe the year before that? If you're a midlife woman navigating menopause, stubborn weight gain, bone loss, and low energy starting over every January isn't the problem. The plan is. One that needs protein to protect muscle, strength training to support bone density, and smart nutrition to keep your metabolism working with you, not against you. Because this isn't about looking good in a dress for one event. It's about staying strong, mobile, and independent for decades to come. I'm not coaching you for your 40s. I'm coaching you so you're not in a nursing home at 80. If this is the year you stop chasing skinny and start building strength for life, welcome to Faster Way. Check the show notes for more details. Health, wellness, fitness, and everything in between. We're removing the taboo from what really matters in midlife. I'm your host, Michelle Folan, and this is Asking for a Friend. Today's episode goes straight to the core of an issue affecting more midlife women than we realize: loneliness, disconnection, and the health consequences that come with losing our sense of community. As we move through our 40s, 50s, and 60s, life shifts. Kids leave home, careers evolve, aging parents need us, friendships change, and our own bodies begin a new hormonal chapter. Those transitions often leave women feeling more isolated than ever, even when surrounded by people. And the science is clear. Chronic loneliness significantly increases the risk of cardiovascular disease, depression, anxiety, and even early mortality. That's why today's guest is the perfect voice for this conversation. Terry Taddiosian is a Harvard-trained, ISSA certified personal trainer, nutritionist, emotional eating coach, hormone specialist, and the founder of Thor, the House of Rose retreats, where she has helped hundreds of midlife women rebuild their health, confidence, and most importantly, their connections. Terry's expertise sits at the intersection of community and healing. She understands how working out alongside other women boosts adherence, reduces stress, elevates mood, and brings back something most of us have been missing. Joy. Her retreats are known not just for physical transformation, but for the deep lasting friendships women carry home with them. Terry Tatiosian, welcome to Asking for a Friend.

Terry Tateossian:

Michelle, thank you for having me. It's an absolute pleasure.

Michele Folan:

Well, I am so happy you're here, and I'm even happier that I learned how to pronounce your last name. So I'm it's it's a good start to the day.

Terry Tateossian:

I love it.

Michele Folan:

You know, and I told you before we started, I said, you know, I've been following you for quite some time, and it was because of your own personal transformation that was incredibly powerful. And I always love to know what was the moment, or maybe even that rock bottom place that you said to yourself, something has to change.

Terry Tateossian:

Great question. So there were multiple, multiple rock bottom situations and events that led me to finally get my act together. And let me tell you, it was the most difficult thing I have ever achieved in my life, despite considering myself to be very hardworking, fairly intelligent, and kind of a little bit of an overachiever. And um, yeah, that this was one of the most mysterious uh journeys of my life. But I ended up in the hospital twice. So I thought I was having heart attacks at the time. The first one did not get through to me that I was living in a very unhealthy uh type of way. I was uh working 16, 17 hour days. I had had two children, one at 30, one at 35. And I was still wearing maternity clothes at 37, two years after I had my son, um, because I refused to buy normal clothes. And so little by little I just kept gaining more and more weight. It um, no matter what how many diets I tried. And you know, I've tried over probably about over 30 different diets, you know, from keto to Atkins to South Beach to Fruitarian to carnivore, vegan, don't even get me started on vegan. I did that for six months and I failed. Yeah, so it was a lot of trial and error, a lot of struggle. And um eventually I got brave enough to hire a coach. And you know, Michelle. Yes, so Michelle was my first coach, yes.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, so let's explain. Okay, Michelle McDonald is Joan McDonald's daughter, and many of you already know train with Joan. Joan was also a guest on the podcast, but the two of them are really a powerhouse combo. And um, how lucky for you, I will say, that you got to train with Michelle McDonald because I know that's not easy, but you clearly had some amazing results. So I'll let you go ahead and finish your story. Well, it's a really funny story, okay.

Terry Tateossian:

So this had to be 2016, maybe. Okay. I had been yeah, 2016 or 17 or in that time frame, I had started following Michelle uh because I had a friend who did a competition, and that's and I mean, okay, I'm 210 pounds, okay. My dream is to look like a fitness model, but I am 50% body fat, right? And so I have a and I picture this, right? I have a friend who did a competition and she was showing me her photos and her footage, and so I went down the rabbit hole and I looked at the the top competitors um for that competition, and I followed every single person because I thought I was gonna get a clue on how to get my act together and how can I look like that, right? My vision bored. And I started following Michelle, and I probably stalked her about a year, and in that uh course of time, she had a challenge and she said, Hey, I'm doing a challenge. Anybody that is interested, uh, here's you know an application. I'll let you know if you get accepted. And I don't know, I don't know what got into me. Okay. I was a marshmallow, okay. I was very overweight and I was struggling. I did not, I was completely out of my league, jumped in the deep end of the pool. I filled out the application, and in my mind, I thought to myself, there's no way in hell I'm getting in. So forget about it, right? This is like professional level stuff, okay? Yeah. And she sends me a message, like, you know, uh a week or two later, like, hey, you know, you got accepted. And I was like, what?

Speaker 2:

What are you talking about?

Terry Tateossian:

So I got in. That's awesome. I got into her, I got into her cohort. She had a very uh limited uh space, and everyone in my cohort was prof they were professional. Okay. They were uh they've been in fitness there the majority of their lives, they competed previously. I didn't know what a dumbbell was, okay? That's awesome. I mean, that's how I started out with Michelle. And so she was sent, she would give me my program and it would say like D B R D L, right? I mean, now obviously 10 years later, I know exactly what that is. It's a dumbbell Romanian deadlift. But back then, I was like, what language is this? Like, like, can somebody translate to me what this means? Because it was so far from my expertise, right? So I didn't even know what DB meant a dumbbell. I didn't know what macros were. Okay, so macros to me 10 years ago was an Excel software function.

Michele Folan:

This is so funny, you know, and I and I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at this situation only because, you know, I work with women that are mostly 50, 55 plus, and they all think, oh my gosh, you know, this is so overwhelming. The macros, I what do you mean I have to lift weights? My pink dumbbells are no good anymore, you know. And you did it though. You did it. You were you were obese and you did it.

Terry Tateossian:

You know, there were times Michelle uh like figuratively was dragging me by the hair through the process because I failed a lot, right? So and I and I had a great coach and I still failed. And eventually she realized I was and I was like a child, right? So I would have a binging episode and I would hide it, and and I would check in and I would say, you know, you have to report, like, you know, what are your measurements? How much do you weigh on the scale? And I would be like, oh, you know, I gained three pounds while I'm in a caloric deficit that has been working before. All of a sudden I started gaining weight. So she would say, Well, what the hell's going on? And I'm like, ah, I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I I don't know. I did everything right, and this is just what's happening, right?

Terry Tateossian:

And so eventually she's like, you know, you you're having like emotional binging episodes here, right? So that there's more here than just training in your macros. You're having a lot of self-sabotaging behaviors. And so I kept going back to the drawing board, back to the drawing board, trying over and over and over again until I could get my head straight. And uh, that's when things really settled in.

Michele Folan:

So a couple things here. I think you going through this process yourself has allowed you great empathy for working with your own clients.

Terry Tateossian:

You know, I'm so grateful for that whole experience because it really gives me perspective for how many battles we have to fight as women in order to come out the other side, right? So things like body dysmorphia, let me tell you. You're looking at the poster child here, right? Things like having to learn that uh at some point getting there's a such a thing as getting too skinny, right? Learning that there's an addiction to the number on the scale, there's a dopamine hit to seeing the scale go down every week, and then oh my gosh, what happens when it doesn't, right? Our identity being tied to that. Uh, there is a an anxiety, panic, and depression uh association to the scale going up, right? So there's so there's so much nuance here that um I went through myself that I am so grateful for because I had to learn how to sit in all of these uncomfortable spaces for an extended period of time in order to have things really settle into me. Like for me to fully embody this lifestyle, I spent, I would say, probably about 90% of it being very uncomfortable. Like uh working with Michelle, I did multiple builds, right? So I had to intentionally gain weight in order to build muscle. And the reason why I went through that is because when I lost 80 pounds, my glutes fell down, right? There was nothing there. And so I would ask my coach and say, Well, what can I do? What do I need to do? And she said, You need to do a build and you need to focus on training the glutes more. And so I did that, but I had to gain weight, so the the scale had to go in the opposite direction, right? Yeah, and I had to stay there, I had to stay at 150, 155 pounds for prolonged periods of time. I couldn't be 125 pounds. Like I was at the end of my uh weight loss.

Michele Folan:

Did you find a sweet spot where your weight now you're where you're comfortable at your age now?

Terry Tateossian:

So I I find myself to be comfortable anywhere under 160 pounds. As soon as I approach 155, I just don't feel as energized, I would say. Uh, but my body composition is very different now at 150 pounds than it was 10 years ago at 150 pounds. And so um generally in maintenance, I like to be at 150, 155 pounds is where I feel good, where my hormones are feeling good. I have enough energy, I'm not underweight, I'm not overweight, I'm just functioning as good as as well as possible.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, and you know what? I think this is a great message, Terry, is that we have to find that sweet spot with our weight. And I don't like people to be obsessed with the scale, but there is so much tied to that weight on the scale and just that feeling of well-being that is so important, our make making sure our hormones are in check. And so I think there's a looking at body composition rather than weight is a much healthier way to be. You agree? Absolutely, but it's so hard to untangle ourselves from the scale.

Terry Tateossian:

Yeah, diet culture. And so this is something, oh, for sure. And we're we've been conditioned, right, for so many years. I mean, our whole lives, really, from what I can remember, is that you had to be, I I had to be 120 pounds, or I wasn't worth living, you know, it wasn't worth being here at all. Like, don't even talk to me because I'm just a waste of space if I'm not 120 pounds. And so I had to unlearn all of that and really understand that muscle, muscle weighs more than fat, right? And body composition trumps everything. It matters the most, right? Because the the scale does not understand how much of that weight is muscle, how much of that weight is body fat, your organs, skin, water, digestion, etc.

Michele Folan:

So, yeah, absolutely. Terry, we're gonna take a quick break, and when we come back, I want to talk about the science and reality of loneliness. I want to talk about peptides for a moment. Yes, weight loss peptides are everywhere right now, and when used correctly, they're very effective and backed by years of clinical data. But peptides are not just about weight loss. There are peptides that support metabolic health, energy, muscle, your sleep, skin, hair, and long-term healthy aging, the things midlife women are actually struggling with. That's why I partnered with a trusted telemedicine resource. My clients were asking for more because eating well and lifting heavy sometimes still isn't enough in midlife. LEMD is physician-led, medically supervised, and uses an FDA certified compounding pharmacy. No internet hacks, no self-prescribing, no guessing. This isn't about chasing a smaller body. It's about preserving muscle, protecting your metabolism, and supporting the body you want to live in for the next 20 to 30 years. If you want real options, not trends, you can learn more through the link in the show notes. Okay, we are back. Before we went on break, I told you I wanted to talk about the science and reality of loneliness. And I think I read this maybe a couple weeks ago. We talk about sitting as the new smoking, but they also talk about loneliness being the new smoking for midlife women. And I'm curious why you think that isolation hits so hard in this particular season of life. It's so interesting, right?

Terry Tateossian:

So if we look back at our roles, most of our roles as women have been as caretakers, right? So either children, aging parents, family, household, maybe even career, right? So if we've dedicated our whole lives to our career and we're reaching retirement age, our whole identity is changing, right? And so we're approaching our midlife, 50, 60 years old, and these identities no longer apply, right? Maybe the children have moved out, maybe parents are no longer around, maybe we're retiring, maybe we got a divorce. All kinds of things have shifted around. And so when we have spent our whole lives being the emotional backbone for everybody else, who is there for us in that period of time, right? So we wake up and we go, Well, who's here for me? Right? And sometimes, you know, people just assume that because you we have been the caretaker and the emotional support for them, that we don't need that, right? So usually the strongest people have very little support emotionally because everybody just assumes that they they have it together, they don't they don't need my help, right? But that's not really the case. And so women are conditioned to not ask for help, not take up space, just be silent in their own uh emotional state. So I feel like in midlife they kind of take center stage a lot of times. And you know, we see I see it all the time.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, we know the data, and women with strong ties socially tend to live longer. But emotionally, what does community do that's so low health efforts simply cannot?

Terry Tateossian:

So I I'll tell you from first hand experience, because I've I literally live that that is the secret sauce. So any time, and it doesn't just apply to health, it applies to Business. It applies to any type of goal, any type of project, any type of venture or activity or whatever it may be. Health is uh where I experienced it in the most dramatic way. So when you're in a community or in a group that has the same goal and intention as you do, all of a sudden you feel like um you don't have to carry your shame alone. Right? So people sharing their own struggle, their own challenges, their own failures, quote unquote, right? Embolden you to say, oh wow, you know, I'm not alone in this. I don't have to carry the shame on my own. You can share it with a group. Uh people winning in the group, people winning in the small pod of community that you've joined. It gives you more courage and hope, like, oh my gosh, I can do this too, right? And so you you become a little bit more brave. At the same time, maybe your pain tolerance increases, right? Maybe you're seeing as a collective, the whole group lifting heavy and you know, really working hard on their macros and uh figuring things out. And you're like, well, you know, maybe I can do this too. You know, I don't have to, I don't have to be afraid of um going to the gym. If so-and-so can do it, I can do this too, right? It gives you a little bit more uh tolerance to being uncomfortable. Yep. Your motivation goes up, right? You're seeing people taking action and moving and doing things, and you're like, yeah, you know, there's like a dopamine hit to that, right? And so uh your oxytocin increases, right? Because now you have somebody to talk to and you have the same interests and you're doing the same things, and maybe they they live on the other side of the world. It still doesn't matter. You have a common bond and you have that connection, right? Your dopamine goes up because now you start doing new things, you're learning new things, you're experimenting, you're doing all this stuff, your hormones stabilize, right? So when you're in a connected type of situation, you feel like you have a little bit more purpose, right? And it your biology starts recalibrating. You just you feel better, you you feel um less alone, right? Yeah.

Michele Folan:

You know, I I have to say this. I worked out at home for a very long time. And then earlier this year, I rejoined the gym. I had always gone to the gym, and for some reason, I just decided I was just gonna work out at home. I've got a lot of equipment in the basement. It has been so enjoyable to go to the gym, but not only for my own purposes, but to approach older women. And when I'm saying older, I'm saying 65, 70, 75, and chatting with these women to find out what motivates them because I'm always so amazed. You know, they're doing the machines, they're doing weights and all of that. And it's really helped me. Like I look at them and I say, well, gosh, you know, what am I complaining about? You know, here's here's this woman who's, you know, 15 years older than I doing, you know, doing all the stuff. And and so I see where that can be very motivating and bring, you know, you can laugh with these women. And, you know, I think that's something that we don't get enough of is that kind of community. Um, I don't know these women, I always ask their name, but why do you think that that joy that you get in that moment is so critical for adherence and results in the long run?

Terry Tateossian:

Well, it kind of gives you a mirror, you know, it it reflects back to you parts about yourself that maybe you are not giving enough credit, right? So you see somebody that's your age doing, you know, incredible things in the gym, being consistent, and there you are too, but you're never really giving yourself credit for that. But it's easier to give credit to her because she's doing it, but then somewhere in your mind, you're like, ah, I'm doing this too. So yeah, I'm associated with this person, and I feel really good about it, right? And so it gives you a bit of a mirror, it interrupts the shame spiral a little bit, right? Because we tend to beat ourselves up a lot, you know. As women, we do it all the time. But somehow, when our friend is having a challenge, we're a lot kinder, and somewhere, hopefully, in their mind, it comes right back to us because we give that back to ourselves. But there's so many, so many reasons, right? Like gives you hope. Like if you see when I see somebody in in their 80s going to the gym and doing all these things, I'm gonna be 50 next year. It makes me really happy. It makes me really happy that I'm still showing up for myself because it's so easy, right? Like the big five-oh, it's so easy to get into my head about it and say, Oh, you're insignificant, nobody cares what the heck you're doing at this point. No, that's not true, right?

Michele Folan:

Right. Oh, yeah. You know, and I spoke to a woman the other day at the gym. Her name was Carol. Carol was 68, close to 70. And she was kind of nursing a knee replacement. And I said, Well, that's fantastic, you're here. She goes, Well, last year I had both shoulders replaced. She's at the gym, you know, and I I love that community. You know, she was chatting with other people, and and you have to think that that not only helped her get back to the gym, but helped with her healing process of having that community around her.

Terry Tateossian:

Absolutely.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, yeah. I just think it's fantastic because I think so often we have those types of major surgeries, and we take we take a few steps backward. And that we don't have to do that. You have to have something to drive you forward because, you know, um, it's like getting, you know, having a broken hip or something like that. That can be devastating. It's it's keeping moving. So, what motivates you? And I think what you're saying is, you know, you lead these retreats where women form these friendships that last long after the trip. Talk a little bit about why you started these retreats that you do and what was that environment that you were trying to build. Absolutely.

Terry Tateossian:

So the retreats are kind of like um a fully immersive experience into this lifestyle. And uh, it's five days, four nights. We do yoga every day, restorative yoga for the emotional regulation, nervous system regulation at night. We um eat nutritious whole foods. We talk a lot about that. We do have some lifting sessions and plotti sessions, talk about the benefits of muscle and just a full all-around lifestyle type of immersion into this particular lifestyle because I know how difficult it is and how intimidating it can be uh initially to get started.

Michele Folan:

So, what themes or struggles do you see come up repeatedly among midlife women at your retreats?

Terry Tateossian:

A lot of the struggles that I I do notice is just misinformation on what to eat and how to eat. Specifically, most women are under-eating protein and overeating uh fat and carbs. That's the a lot of what I do see. Chronic or under eating is another one where women are stuck in a cycle of uh constant dieting. That's another common thing that I noticed is being underweight or overweight. There's it's one of uh the two usually. And um, you know, some misconceptions on hormone health and things like that. Uh there's lots of noise out there right now, and what to do, and you know, which medications to take to lose weight, and which GLP and which HRT. It's so there's so much going on where it's disguising the natural things you could do before uh attempting any of these other things.

Michele Folan:

So it sounds like you really stress lifestyle. So we're we're talking about stress reduction, moving our bodies, and eating whole foods. So I love that philosophy. I think that is such a great place to start because you and I both know that without good lifestyle, HRT and a GLP one isn't going to help you long term. Those are they're they're great help, but you've got you've got to do the the hard work on the front end. You agree?

Terry Tateossian:

Absolutely. And I'm not saying that they don't belong uh in the spectrum of uh ways to manage things, but there's a time and place for them and they're for specific people. So uh that's just my ideology on that.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, I agree. Can you share a powerful story of a woman whose life was changed as she joined your community and found herself at your retreats?

Terry Tateossian:

Well, uh, I mean, I'll tell you this much. I I don't want to single anybody out, but I'll tell you this much. So quite a few of my clients have been to a retreat and then have become one-on-one coaching clients. And uh it sometimes it starts that way and sometimes it goes in the other direction. So sometimes women start as coaching clients and then they come to retreats. But generally, what I have uh heard uh directly is that uh sometimes a catalyst is a retreat, but then what happens? The real work starts when you go home, right? And you go home and you apply these ideas and uh these habits into your lifestyle and you learn how to integrate them on a consistent basis? That's where the magic really happens.

Michele Folan:

How do you get women to open up? Because I would think sometimes people show up and they may be a little guarded. How do you get them feeling safe enough to really participate? It's such a good question. Am I right though? Are they do people kind of just like kind of a little tentative as they come in?

Terry Tateossian:

Yes, yes, and so I I might have a unique style with this where I don't ask a lot of questions, I don't really pry, I just let people be in their own space. I don't uh force the schedule, I don't force any particular activities. People can choose to interact with the group or not, and there's no judgment in that, right? Uh I I don't have any expectations. Wow, what a great question you just asked me like that. I I have no expectations for what I expect from the people that come into a relationship, right? So sometimes people come because they need more space in their lives, they they feel overwhelmed at home. Um, so the last thing I would want to do is uh make them feel more overwhelmed, right? Or more noised and chatter. And sometimes people come because they want they want that, they want entertainment and stories and jokes and activities and things like that. So it's a very different uh type of vibe for each person. Uh, but over the course of five days, what I hope to achieve is uh to provide whatever it is that is needed for each person, and each person is very unique, and so it's a little bit difficult to answer, but there are some groups that are very similar, and that's where a lot of magic happens, right? And um, when people synchronize their energies, uh we had one group where we laughed so hard our abs were hurting for five days.

Michele Folan:

That's awesome. Everybody was so funny. Yeah, that's great though. Yeah, that's and that makes you always feel good that people when people finally feel at ease to open up. But I totally understand that some people come to that needing that that space and quiet time to kind of reconnect with themselves, right? For women listening that may feel isolated, what's the first smallest step she can take today to feel less alone?

Terry Tateossian:

What a good question. So I'll tell you what I do, right? So if I start to feel that feeling, right? And it and it's I I mean, the best way I can describe it is it's like a mix of grief. So, what does loneliness really feel like if I had to break it down from my perspective? It's like a missing of something, right? You're missing someone, you're missing something, you're grieving, maybe your past life, maybe um your ex-husband, your children, maybe your divorced, maybe someone passed away, right? So there's a a bit of a uh grief mixed with a fear that I'm never going to have that ever again, right? Yep. And so uh that's I mean, I've never thought about this. I just just kind of try to dissect it in the moment because I'm like, what does it taste like to me and what does it feel like? And there's a a bit of a hopelessness in it, right? So I'm never gonna have that ever again. So you're grieving whatever you lost, and then you're afraid that you're never going to feel that way again, right? You're never gonna find another friend, you're never gonna be happy again. And that to me is loneliness. So, how how would I go about addressing it? I would say the grief is never gonna go away, right? So that's gonna be there for as long as it needs to be. Just feel it, sit with it, try to remember, you know, the the good parts of uh having the time with the situation, the environment, the place, the person. But then think about well, what can I do that is so different from this thing that I'm grieving, right? That it's gonna give me a new avenue to pursue, right? So hey, I've I've never gone rollerblading or whatever, something that you've always wanted to do, that you never had time to do. You were too busy with your family, your business, your friends, your your your household, your parents, whatever. But it's something you always wanted to do. So for me, that was yoga. Oh, interesting, right? Uh-huh. Um, so I I really uh in my 20s when people would ask me, what do you want to be in your life if you could do anything and you didn't have to worry about it financially? Uh my answer was always I wanted to be a yoga teacher at the beach. Of course, at the beach. Yeah. Don't ask me why. So I dived into that, right? And so I made a lot of friends through the learning process of yoga. And yoga is philosophical. There's, you know, uh the asanas are physical. So there's so many things to learn in that particular theme. Uh, that when you start connecting with other people that are studying the same thing, um, you make friends, and then little by little you don't feel as lonely. And you also have a purpose, right? Every morning you wake up, you get up, and you say, okay, how can I improve my handstand or headstand or my plank or my down dog or you know, whatever it is that those you're working on, and then you can connect with the people that you joined in the cohort or group, or let's say it's a lifestyle transformation group. It could be your macros, right? How do I make the best meal and you know, for my meal number three, for example? Or right, whatever it may be, do something new and join a community where they're doing the exact same thing on the exact same timeline. So they're not ahead of you and they're not really behind you, they're in the same spot. Yeah.

Michele Folan:

And you know, and I think we can we can translate this to all kinds of things. I mean, it's I I've had um an empty nest expert on my show before, and we talked about, you know, take the art class. You know, you've wanted to paint, you know, go go try, you know, a painting class. And I think we worry about rejection too. It's like we've already felt some rejection, and that that may be part of that loneliness that we're feeling, but you don't know till you try. And I think by this time, you know, it's be adventurous, don't let that that fear of rejection or not being good enough hold you back from having new experiences, because I think that's so important. And this is a good segue into my next question because I think more and more women are willing to invest in retreats. And is it burnout, loneliness, identity shifts, or is it something deeper that you're seeing?

Terry Tateossian:

I think what I'm seeing is we're just really tired. We're really tired, and we we are caretakers, right? So 90% of the time we're caretakers. So when you go on a retreat, especially ones where everything is included and somebody's taking care of you for those five days, you don't have to think about what am I gonna eat? What am I gonna cook? What is so-and-so gonna eat, what am I gonna cook for them, and all these things, and what am I gonna do, or what's my activity? You don't have to think about any of that. It's already the schedule's already created. You can choose the only decision you have to make is do I participate or do I not? And that's it, right? And so there's a lot of decision-making fatigue that I am seeing that, and then that's a common theme. And and it's doesn't matter your age, it doesn't matter if you're 30 or you're, you know, 95. It's the same kind of thing. And it's a little bit of a different type of environment, right? So change of scenery, change of environment, change of activities, and then no, you don't need to make any decisions, you just literally get to focus on yourself. Um, and I think we're lacking that across the board, all of us.

Michele Folan:

For sure. And your brand asks, and I love this. Tagline, how good can it get? So, for women listening, what does good actually look like in this season of life?

Terry Tateossian:

Anything you want. What a great season in life to be in. And I joke around about this all the time. You can do whatever you want. Yeah. Right. So, like, really, the only thing that is, and and I I know that I'm gonna get arguments. Well, financially, I can do whatever you want. Yes, you can. Yes, you can. You just have to um reposition the way you think about things, right? And you have to um try and see or find, be resourceful, right? So find ways to make things happen uh in a way that you you can afford to do them, you have the time to do them, you're willing to do them. It's an amazing part of life. We have more resources in our 50s, 60s, and 70s. We have more time available. Uh, we can join travel groups, right? So that's another uh thing I notice a lot. You know, we don't want to travel alone, but there's so many ways to go with a group or in a group where you're not alone, where other people are traveling solo as well. Um, we can choose to have just extraordinary experiences and see the world, yeah. Um make new friends. If if you're into traveling, you can sign up for a safari in in somewhere in Africa and go.

Michele Folan:

Yeah. And and and you know, but I think you there's there are things that we can do in our backyard as well. And but I think it's just saying yes, say yes to yourself and go and do the thing. Because how wonderful and gratifying it is to stretch yourself a little bit and be adventurous, you know. It's like I think sometimes, Terry, we forget that adventurous side that we have. You know, we we we were adventurous at eight. We were adventurous maybe even at 12. At what point did we stop, you know, having that lust for adventure? And uh I love I love that you do these retreats. Speaking of retreats, I was looking at your 2026 schedule. Oh my lord, please tell my listeners um some of the retreat locations that you have coming up.

Terry Tateossian:

Yeah, so we have, I think maybe 15 uh dates in the Smoky Mountains in 2026, right on top of a mountain hill, mountaintop, uh 50 acres of natural turkey forest land. Uh nothing around, you're literally in nature. So I think there's 15, 16 dates for that. Then we have two retreats in the south of France. Um, one is in April, one is in uh September, and then we have one in Sedona in June. And they all include hiking, they all include yoga. Uh, some of them include even gym passes uh to the local gyms to lift weights and get a good workout in. And yeah, there it I'm excited. I'm so excited. I cannot wait.

Michele Folan:

Yeah, you've got a big year ahead of you. I was really impressed. I want to ask you a personal question. What is one of your daily non-negotiables? What's something you do every day for yourself?

Terry Tateossian:

Oh, yeah, I have to lift weights. Okay. That's a non-negotiable thing. Yeah. And that doesn't mean going to the gyms. Uh, I over the years, so it's been over 10 years, I have built out a gym uh in my house uh in in New Jersey. There's also a gym in Tennessee as well. And so you really all you need is dumbbells, uh, maybe a cable machine and a barbell and a bench. And so uh it's a non-negotiable that happens every day. Uh maybe there's one rest day here and there, but I really enjoy it. It makes me feel good mentally, not just physically. And so that is uh the one thing I will not give up.

Michele Folan:

Oh, and I love hearing you say that because that that is probably one of the hardest things for my more mature clients to embrace is lifting weights. And it's because we come from that cardio mentality that it was all about the burn of the cardio and not necessarily the importance of lifting heavy. So thanks for thanks for saying that. I usually I get a lot of people like sleep and yoga meditation, that you know, that stuff, and which I think is all super important because I I think we carry too much stress, but lifting weights is I love it. Like I'd much rather do that than anything now. So I've done I've done total done a total 180 myself.

Terry Tateossian:

So yeah, I mean, don't get me wrong, I love yoga. I teach yoga every Wednesday in a local museum, it's 100 and art museum, actually. Oh, cool. Um, I do Pilates as well. I do cardio every day, but cardio really has a place and time. And so if I am in maintenance, my cardio is maybe 15 minutes tops per day just to get my heart rate up and to have good cardiovascular health. I don't necessarily do any more than that. If I'm in a season where I'm cutting, which um anybody who doesn't know what cutting is, it's being on a diet, trying to drop body weight, body fat specifically, I'm gonna keep my muscles. Thank you. I just, you know, if I'm trying to cut body fat, I will do more cardio, which is what I'm doing currently. I'm looking to cut down on body fat. Steps, obviously, are something that you get throughout the day. So just general movement throughout the day. You know, all these things, but really, if I don't anchor my day with uh the weights, everything else for me seems to kind of slide down into eh, you know.

Michele Folan:

Uh-huh. No, I know, I know. And and it's getting it in early too, which I'm getting better about, but still work in progress there. All right, Terry Tatiosian. Where can our listeners find you?

Terry Tateossian:

You can find me on Instagram. How good can it get is my handle, and you can find me on my website. It is thehouseofarose.com.

Michele Folan:

All right, Terry, thank you so much for being here. And uh check Terry out. And if you want to sign up for one of her retreats, oh she's got she's got some amazing locations and uh it sounds like it would be wonderful. So thank you so much for being here today. Thank you, Michelle. It was my absolute pleasure. Thank you for listening. Please rate and review the podcast where you listen. And if you'd like to join the Asking for a Friend community, click on the link in the show notes to sign up for my weekly newsletter where I share midlife wellness and fitness tips, insights, my favorite finds, and recipes.