Forgiveness

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

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I'm Alexa Lauren and welcome to my podcast, Heart of a Seeker. Today's episode is about forgiveness. I didn't really come up with a super fancy title, but honestly, the heart of the episode today is about forgiveness, something that I feel the Lord really wants us to all talk about and really allow that to sink in. So, Father God, we just open up in prayer right now. We invite you to be a part of this message today, Lord, that your Holy Spirit would guide us and give us the wisdom. I pray that you would move through us and in us. I pray that no weapon formed against us shall prosper. I pray your word would fall on good soil, Lord, and that it would take up root and bear beautiful fruit. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Forgiveness. Hmm. Something I feel like we all can struggle with at times, especially when we have felt offended or wronged by somebody. Sometimes we feel like we have the right to hold on to our pain and the right to want revenge or to get back at someone. But really, is that the heart of God? Is it the heart of God to seek revenge? As I was studying this, it was actually a harder message for me to write. I realized so many scriptures that talk about forgiveness and really seeking the heart of God. And if you think about it, one of the first things that stood out to me is the whole purpose of the reason why Jesus came onto this earth was so that we could have eternal life with them in heaven. In Romans 5, 8, it says, But God demonstrates his own love for us in this. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. I just want to think about that. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. And what is sin, an offense towards God, not keeping his commandments and doing things in spite of what he teaches us because of our flesh? Because sometimes we're selfish and we want to do what we want to do. So if Christ came to this world to die for us while we were still sinners, forgive us and give us forgiveness, so that we could have an eternal life with them in heaven, then why are we so quick to hold on to offenses when we're wronged? Even if we were right, even if what they did to us was wrong and it was grave. You know, sometimes there are some serious offenses that can be done against us. And I'm not saying that you are not a victim, but I am saying that even then God has commanded us to forgive and to love one another and to even bless our enemies when they curse us. So I just really want to marinate on this and think about it. And truthfully, I know this is a very tough topic. And I think even more reason why we need to discuss it. Because the heart of God is forgiveness. He has forgiven us time and time again. When we don't deserve forgiveness, he's forgiven the sinner over and over again, regardless of what your sin is. And that's the thing. Sometimes we think, oh, I didn't sin as bad as that person, or I don't do that. But I read this quote many years ago and it always stuck with me. The quote said, Some sin more loudlier than others. And it got me thinking, that's so true. Some people's sin is easier to identify and see and to point it out and be like, oh my gosh, I can't believe they did that. But yet, what are you doing in secret when no one's watching? What are you doing? What secret sins have you committed that no one really knows you committed because they can't see it? And that really stuck with me and convicted me many years ago when I sometimes, I'm not gonna lie, was a little judgmental. I think sometimes it's in our flesh to want to compare ourselves so we can make ourselves feel better as if we're not that bad. But the word of God says that there is no good in us, and that's why we need repentance, and that's why we need to seek God for forgiveness. And so a few things I want to really point out is beginning to dive into the word and how God can change our hearts, because unforgiveness is a matter of the heart, and sometimes it can cause a root of bitterness. And unforgiveness can hinder our prayers sometimes if we don't go asking forgiveness. And I'm gonna cite exact scriptures, but there's many times in the Bible throughout where it says to go reconcile with our brothers, to go leave our gift at the altar and ask for forgiveness. There's scripture upon scripture that points us back to forgiveness, even if someone sins against you and they come and ask you for forgiveness seven times, then you forgive them those seven times. You know, there's even another passage in the Bible that says, Jesus, how many times should we forgive someone? And he says, seven times 70, meaning forgiveness is constant. We have to constantly forgive. That doesn't mean we're gonna let people walk over us and we're not gonna create boundaries, which is a whole other topic we'll talk about later on as we continue diving into God's word. But I really want to focus and stay focused on the topic of unforgiveness and forgiveness. Something that really stuck out to me and was like a fire verse was Ecclesiastes 7, 21 through 22. It says, Do not take to heart all the things that people say, lest you hear your servant cursing you. Your heart knows that many times you have cursed others. I was like, wow, if that's not a fire verse, I don't know what is. Literally, it's saying and calling us out in our own heart of what we've done. It says, Your heart knows that many times you have cursed others, meaning none of us are perfect, and we've all at times have offended someone in one form or fashion, even might have offended someone without even purposely meaning to. And that's the thing. That's why one thing that really stuck out to me is the motives of the heart. Sometimes one thing is someone didn't mean to offend you, they honestly did not mean to hurt you. Now there are people that maliciously hurt you because they're evil and they want to hurt you because they find joy in that, sadly. And the truth is we don't know the heart, but God does. And even then, God forgives us. It says, even while we were sinners, going back to Romans, Jesus came and died for us for our sins. So I want us to really grasp that as our basis of God sending his son to deliver us from our own sin and offenses and evil towards him. Then it says in Luke 17, 3 through 4, pay attention to yourselves. So what is God doing? Again, redirecting us to ourselves. The first verse just told us that in our heart we know many times we have cursed others. And then in Luke 17, 3 through 4, it says, pay attention to yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day and turns to you seven times saying, I repent, you must forgive him. It's a commandment at this point. We must forgive our brother or sister or whomever committed the offense against us, especially if they come to us and say, I'm so sorry that I offended you, or please forgive me for what I did. I recognized what I did was wrong. And you may question, well, why would I keep forgiving you? Keep doing the same thing over and over again. Well, because we all fall short and we're not perfect human beings. And the Bible even tells us that we all fall short of the glory of God. So why would you expect someone to not continue maybe committing an offense or realizing, you know what, I'm wrong in this, and maybe they're truly genuinely struggling. You we don't always know. And that's why I'm saying sometimes we have to look at the heart and we have to ask God and pray, is this something they're purposely, maliciously doing to me? You can forgive them, but you can set boundaries. Or are they truly needing help and God wants to use you to maybe encourage them? That's something that you're gonna have to seek God on to help you give you wisdom on how to proceed with different people. Just because someone says, Hey, forgive me, doesn't mean necessarily you're gonna keep them in your inner circle. It could mean that you forgive them, but you also set a boundary of where now that person is going to be in your life. So I want to keep that in mind, and I do want to stress that because I don't want to say, hey, just let people keep hurting you and bringing negativity. There are gonna be times that you're gonna have to walk away from certain people and situations, but that doesn't mean you don't give them forgiveness. So again, hold on to these scriptures as we read them. There's another part that really is important, and it's about anger. So sometimes what can manifest when we leave things with unforgiveness is anger can can begin to manifest and harvest. So it says in Psalms 4:4, be angry and do not sin. Ponder in your own hearts on your beds and be silent. I was listening to that this morning, and it really stood out to me because I've read other verses where it says, In your anger, do not sin, do not let the sin go down while you're still angry, which is in Ephesians 4 26. But what really stood out to me in Psalms 4.4 was be angry and do not sin. Ponder in your own hearts on your beds. So two things that really stood out to me is your own heart. Again, God wanting us to look at the matter of our own heart and not focus so much on what how we were offended or what someone did to us, but to really think about why that anger is manifesting. Why are we so offended? Why are we hurt? Why are we mad? And then it says on your beds, which what does that tell me? That tells me we need to develop a prayer life. We need to begin to seek God in matters when we feel hurt, angry, whatever the matter is. There are scriptures that talk about praying about everything. Pray about everything. So when it says to go to ponder in your own hearts on your beds, it makes me really think about developing that prayer life and seeking God when we are going through something and wanting Him to help us because some, again, going back to what I said earlier, some offenses can be really grave. Maybe you were abused, maybe you were taken advantage of, maybe you were used. I'm not saying that, oh, get over it, because honestly, those are very difficult things, but we do have a good father that loves us and does vindicate for us. And I do believe that if we trust him, he can turn things around and he can help us forgive. And one thing that came to my mind when I was reading all these things is God even forgives a murderer. God even forgives some of the most atrocious things we can ever think of and be like, how can God forgive that type of person that committed that type of sin? But that's the point, is when we don't know Jesus and we don't know God, we will continue to do things whether on purpose or unknowingly, because there is no good in us. We're not perfect human beings. So we have to remember that we sometimes get so angry and frustrated, but we have to look at our own heart and understand that do not take to heart all the things that people say. Sometimes people say things out of anger or their own hurt or their own pain, or they do things because that's all they ever knew. Or maybe they were abusive because their family was abusive to them because they didn't know any better. And, you know, you might sit there and say, oh, that's an excuse. Well, you know what? Before we knew Jesus, what did we do? How did we behave? Why are we so quick to quickly judge someone based on what they've done to us without really looking at the heart? And that's why God looks at the heart. And it's our job to look at our own heart and allow God to heal us and change our hearts so that we can be ones that extend grace and forgiveness because it is a commandment to forgive others. In Matthew 6 6, it says, But when you pray, go into your room, close the door, and pray to your father who is unseen. Then your father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. So again, going back from Psalms 4 4 where it says to pondering your own hearts on your bed, then in Matthew 6.6 it tells us to pray in our rooms, to go to that place of intimacy with God and seek him and pray for him to guide us, for him to heal us, for him to bring the wisdom that we need to be able to handle different types of situations. And also remembering that we must always be in a place of forgiveness. In Matthew 11, 23 through 25, Jesus is speaking and he says, Have faith in God, truly I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, be taken up and thrown into the sea, and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, forgive if you have anything against anyone, so that your father also, who is in heaven, may forgive you of your trespasses. So if you notice, several things are pointed out here in Matthew 11, 23 through 25. It talks about first off the importance of prayer and believing and having that faith in God, but believing and believing you've received it before it's even happened. So there's your act of faith. And then from there, as you continue reading, it says, And when you stand praying, forgive if you have anything against anyone. So if sometimes forgiveness can hinder our prayers if we don't release things, if we don't forgive people and just say, you know what, God, this happened, it hurt me, it wounded me. Please bring healing into my life. I forgive that person, I release them to you, and it says to pray for our enemies. So when something is done towards you, pray for them instead of cursing them. There have been times when I've felt offended and things have happened, and you know, I wasn't even going to share this testimony, but right now it came to remembrance. And a few years ago, many years ago, actually over 10 years ago, when I was about nine, actually, I was 21 years old, and around the age of 19, though, my dad was going through a financial hardship. It was during the recession in 2009, and he had borrowed my credit and done some things. And unfortunately, it did put me in a financial situation myself, without saying too much. But that did cause a lot of anger, and I felt offended and I felt used, and I was like, why would my own parent do something like this? Shouldn't your parents help you? Well, unfortunately, you know, my dad was in a very difficult situation. But of course, sometimes we don't look at the other person. And I'm not saying what he did was the right way to handle things, but that was the way he chose to handle that situation. And for years I kind of held it against him. But at the age of 21, God began to work on me, and I was very angry towards him. I did not trust him when it came to certain financial advice my dad would try and give me. What ended up happening was I remember receiving prayer for my anger because I was very angry along with many things in my past. And when they prayed for me, God told me, forgive your father for the financial situation that he put you in. Don't worry. I'm going to bless you and take care of you, and I'm going to help you resolve that matter. So I went ahead and I released forgiveness to my father. And the most beautiful thing happened throughout the years after God began to restore my relationship with my father. I did not realize that that matter, along with a few other things of unforgiveness towards him, was keeping me from having restoration in my relationship with my dad. And I'm very glad I did because during that time when I began to seek God and he began to heal me and deliver me of certain beliefs. I remember I began praying for my father that he would come to know Jesus one day the way I did, because I didn't know what my dad's belief was or if he was even truly a Christian. And so for years I prayed for him. And by the age of 27, my dad was not doing well. I was actually 26. And I remember God began to give me opportunity to minister to my father about six, seven years later. And one day I was able, three months before my dad passed away, to lead him through the prayer of salvation and ask him if he wanted to invite Jesus to come live in his heart. And it was actually very beautiful to have been given the opportunity to have released forgiveness to my father and over the years allow God, A, to bring restoration to our relationship and B, right before he passed away, three months before, meaning it's never too late to invite Jesus to come be a part of your life. And knowing that even though when he passed away, I know that he was able to have an everlasting life full of healing in heaven. And I really want to open up this opportunity to anybody that maybe has not had the opportunity to really invite Jesus to be a part of their life, to really say, Jesus, forgive me of my sins. I recognize that I've tried to live life without you. And I invite you to come be a part of my life. I believe that you died on the cross for my sins and that God raised you from the dead. I pray that you would be the Lord and Savior of my life. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen. And if you pray that, you have now allowed and invited Jesus to be a part of your life, and that now you can begin to unlock the authority that He has given us as believers. That's why forgiveness is so powerful, because sometimes we don't even know how God can use us to bring somebody else into knowing him. In Proverbs 19:11, it says, good sense makes one slow to anger, but it is his glory to overlook an offense. So sometimes overlooking the offense isn't acting like it never happened. Sometimes it's realizing that God is our vindicator, God is our healer, God is our peacemaker. And forgiving and extending forgiveness unlocks so many more things than revenge would. It only revenge and anger only brings more anger and hurt and bitterness. But forgiveness brings you freedom. And I think that's why when we read all those scriptures just a bit ago, God continues to redirect us to ourselves, to watch ourselves, to look at our own heart and to release forgiveness so that our prayers would not be hindered. So my prayer today is that if there's anyone that you need to forgive, I just pray that God would bring that person to your mind and to your heart and that you would release forgiveness to them. Sometimes that looks like calling that person, speaking to that person. Sometimes it's just as much as just praying and saying, God, I forgive and release this person to you. They may not be on earth anymore. They might have passed away. They might be someone that it is probably not the best situation to maybe open that door and speak to them again. So maybe it's just as much as going into your room, speaking to God into that intimate place, and just saying, Jesus, I release this person to you. I release this anger, I release this pain, I forgive this person for what they did. And just beginning to release everything to God at his feet and allowing him to bring healing into your life. Because forgiveness sometimes is more about healing ourselves than so much about the other person. And then I want you to say a prayer for them. I want you to pray for them that God would heal them as well and that they would come to know Christ fully as well. So, Father God, we just pray right now in the name of Jesus that this word would begin to just bring fruit into our lives, Lord, that you would bring peace into our lives. And also if we were the offender to anyone, if we did something and we feel like we need to go ask for forgiveness, I pray that we would go and ask for forgiveness or that you would forgive us as well for the things that we have done to others, Lord, because no one is perfect, Lord. And I just pray in the name of Jesus for healing. In Jesus' name I pray, amen. Before I sign off, I do want to say if you prayed that prayer earlier and asked Jesus to be a part of your life, please reach out to me on social media or my email. My email is alexa lauren at gmail.com. You can also find me on TikTok, Facebook, and Instagram as I'm Alexa Lauren. I would love to hear from you, and I hope you guys have a blessed week.