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pools podcast with hump days with
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Heather I hope you're having an amazing
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day well
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on this episode I want to talk about how
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you handle your self-identity during the
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busy season
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so
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when I do business coaching that's one
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of the big topics that comes up and
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um
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I guess a lot of people I'm finding
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don't know themselves like you get lost
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in yourself you don't know who you are
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internally without that business with
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that being said
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you can join my Facebook group if you
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want to it's Integrity Consultants
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um feel free to join and Rudy and I will
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be happy to
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help you with this because it's it's a
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it's a big thing
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and it took me a while to figure that
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out because I mean I built this business
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with Chris
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God how many years ago was this
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um let's see Chris and I got married in
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2010
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we started dating in 2008
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so we started the business in 2009
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so I've been running this business since
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2009
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and of course everybody knows when you
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start a business it's all business
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business at the very beginning and it's
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tough because you're working so hard to
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build that business to build that Legacy
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and in this process with doing it in
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this many years you're solely focused on
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that business and you lose yourself
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so how do you how do you help reclaim
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yourself and understand that hey
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this happens during business and
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how do I how do I set myself back and
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how do I separate the the two identities
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of myself because everybody has two
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identities right you have your work
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identity and you have your personal
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identity it's the same as your disc
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profiling
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every one of my coaching clients get
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disprofiling I do two different disc
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profiling I do a personal profile and I
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do a business profile that lets me know
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where they're at personality wise
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because everybody is different like mine
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though I'm be honest my personal and my
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my business are pretty much in line
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because of the individual that I am so
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I'm a high D so that means I'm a take
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charge person I'm gonna get you the
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results that we need
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so how do you identify who you are so I
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always tell my people step one what
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makes you the happiest
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what do you do whenever
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you have to de-stress that's the biggest
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aspect the first thing that pops your
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mind what do you love to do to de-stress
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is it family time is it gaming is it
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reading a book is it turning off your
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phone and sitting in the hot tub with a
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glass of wine and just chilling is it
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shopping
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um those of you that have shopping as
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these stress in this industry is
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probably a bad idea I'm just gonna tell
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you that
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I've started picking up shopping a lot
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more and I've had a
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I've had a cut back since I've had my
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weight loss I actually enjoy you know
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getting close hubby took me to the store
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for anniversary to try on a dress from
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Dolce and Gabbana I think that's the
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correct terminology for it I'm not a big
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I'm not a big name brand person so I
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don't know I'm actually not any brand
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person at all this dress was 2 500 or
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2800 whatever it was I posted it on my
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Facebook so go check it out but I looked
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hot in it I was like I need a sugar
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daddy to to buy me this dress
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but anyways um so for me it was like
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shopping to decrease but that's not who
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I am right so who I am as an individual
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is going to be that's just how I
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de-stress right it's going to be like
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I'm a Mom first and foremost
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and sometimes my my mom comes out of my
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business and my business comes out of my
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mom and I have to learn to separate
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those two because without putting that
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like my son is seven so I can't be like
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fire and Broomsticks with my
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seven-year-old who's got ADHD that is
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over stimulating overwhelmed at times to
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access that and be like okay mom step
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back this is not business right so I
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have to identify the issues that I have
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inside of me at the present moment is it
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Mom Voice or is it work voice
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secondly I'm a wife
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obviously
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I've gotta rain that in I think I've
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done a lot better and Stephen will I
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think vouch for me on this
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um I've been a lot better on the whole
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Steven's uh one of our good friends by
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the way uh well vouch for me that saying
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I've done a lot better on the
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the husband and wife Dynamic inside of
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the business with respect of my husband
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a lot more than I had in the past
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um because that's a tough one if you
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work with your spouse and you were
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constantly
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every day with your spouse and you feel
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whatever way that you feel about your
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spouse it's hard sometimes to separate
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that too
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so I think the biggest issue for me is
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who I am outside of my business I used
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to think that if I didn't have my
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business I was a failure if I didn't
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have my business if I didn't Thrive I'm
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a failure and I can't start over or I
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can't I can't be the person that people
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perceive me as because my business isn't
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where it should be or I've or I've ran
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across issues in my business and that
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shouldn't happen like what are people
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going to think you know what are people
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going to think first off because if my
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business not succeeding that tells me as
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an individual I'm not as you know being
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successful and in fact that is the
5:35
complete opposite of how you should
5:37
think
5:48
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5:50
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5:53
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5:55
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6:02
[Music]
6:09
[Music]
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it should be individually how am I
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individually first and foremost because
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you can't operate a business if you
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individually if you don't know who you
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are individually if you don't like the
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person that you perceive yourself
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individually and you don't want people
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to perceive you individually in a
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certain manner then change it you have
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the power to change that and for me
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that started with my weight loss I've
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lost 110 pounds and I'm sure if you go
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back on the videos If Rudy's posted you
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know the videos before I haven't even
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looked at past I'm sure he has because I
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did videos you can see like even in my
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face and you know everywhere else the
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difference and that's
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I I ate I ate who I was that like I was
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eating food not hate like h-a-t like ate
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like food I was eating myself to death
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literally if I was stressed if I was
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bored if I was doing whatever because I
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thought that
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my individual self didn't matter it was
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my business self
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and once I understood that and I
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faced my issue head on I could
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understand that okay it's person it's my
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person it's not my business
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you have to take whatever that issue is
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starting out and tackle it head on
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example if I have I don't have it with
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me but if I had a cup of water right
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let's say imagine me holding a cup of
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water
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how much do you think this cup of water
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weighs 16 ounces eight ounces whatever
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it may be and in fact the longer you
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hold on to it the more that that water
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is actually going to perceive you to
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weigh right your arm's gonna get tired
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it's gonna get
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shaky it's gonna get
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like worn out right because the longer
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that you hold it the more that your arm
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weighs because it's heavy over time
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obviously you don't hold a cup of water
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for an hour you'll be right but like I'm
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talking about hours on end it's the same
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thing the longer that your body holds on
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to something the heavier it begins to
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weigh on you the heavier it begins to
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make you think that okay this is you
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individually when in fact it's not
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so you have to think really hard as the
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self-help how am I going to separate
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myself from my business and only you can
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answer that nobody can answer that for
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you as much as I can coach you and teach
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you what to look for the signs what to
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look for for me it was definitely my
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weight because I perceived myself body
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as nothing and I was perceiving my
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business as everything and so I was
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turning around I started having fatty
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liver
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I was passing out when I was bending
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over putting my shoes or my boots on to
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lace them up if I didn't wear flip-flops
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I couldn't breathe in my pants you know
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so I was at a size 22 which meant if you
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don't know that that's a very large size
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right
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um that's pass 2XL I was 3XL in shirts
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and now I'm you know down to a six in
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pants and I'm a small to extra small and
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tops
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because I took time to understand that
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self-help girls guys I can't stress that
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enough
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learn your identity get to know your
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identity and start focusing on that
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identity outside of the work your worth
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is worth more
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than just your business
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guys and gals learn that
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be respectful of your body and the
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people around you to help with that and
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it's hard guys I'm not gonna lie
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my first process during this journey was
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was hard it was okay
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for me
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it was me passing out putting my shoes
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on and that's I mean that for me just
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instantly clicked like okay I have to do
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something myself worth my business is
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killing me literally my business was
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killing me because I was stressed all
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the time so because I was eating all the
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time I was stress eating
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that's not who I wanted to be and that's
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not who I wanted people to perceive me
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as
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so I'm very thankful that it took it
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took a very
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a very dramatic as I like to say
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um dramatic dramatic thing to help me
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realize that but hopefully I can help
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you realize that before it gets to that
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point in your life
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um reach out to me let me know what you
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need help with um I'm there Rudy is the
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same way you know Rudy's been a a very
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godsend with me with certain aspects of
11:00
my business as well and personal life to
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I don't have the Judgment you know you
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want to find somebody that's not going
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to judge you first and foremost like
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that is your support system has to be
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your support system
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period
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make sure you find somebody for that
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because it is
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It's A Hard Road to go by yourself
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learn who you are outside of your
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business
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once you figure that out your business
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will thrive
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well I hope you've enjoyed this episode
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until next week bye guys



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