Alchemising Education - Leap Takers

 What if the only thing standing between your child and a thriving education… is everything you were taught to believe about school?

In this gutsy, permission-giving episode, QuantiMama Jodi and QuantiMama Kerri get honest about what it really took to become Leap Takers. They lay down the five biggest fears parents face when considering a shift—fears they know intimately because they’ve lived them:
“I’m not qualified.”
“What if my kid resists?”
“What if I stuff it all up?”

This is not a step-by-step how-to. It’s a balls-and-all invitation to reimagine parenting without outsourcing your power. To question the narrative that says stress is normal, resistance is defiance, and the curriculum is king.

Along the way, they unpack:

• How to know if your child’s school resistance is actually a signal—not a flaw
• What ‘uncoercible’ parenting looks like when no one’s watching
• Why socialisation is wildly misunderstood (and often overdone)
• How de-schooling isn’t just for kids—it’s a total parental mindset shift
• And why starting before you're ready might just be the most honest move you make

There’s no blueprint here—just a deep belief in the capacity of families to course-correct. And a loving reminder: You’re not alone. This path might be non-linear, but it’s faarking worth it.

If your inner knowing’s been nudging you toward something else, hit play. And if you’re curious about the course Jodi and Kerri built while walking this road, you’ll find it here: quantimama.com/take-the-leap

Loved this convo? Come deeper.
This is the tip of the iceberg—and you’re not meant to navigate birth, parenting, or education alone. We’re here for the ones doing it differently.

Find our free resources, self-paced courses, monthly gatherings and more at quantimama.com

High Vibe Birth Course
Learn how to birth ecstatically—from someone who’s done it. Four times. This isn’t just prep—it’s a reclaiming. Breath, mindset, partner work, and the power to shift your whole story.
Includes the Hello Baby birth film, guided meditations + Birth Mind Movies.
→ quantimama.com/highvibebirth

Take The Leap (to Homeschooling)
Deschool yourself. Tune into your child. Rethink everything. This is the course that helps you decide if homeschooling is right for your fam—without the fluff.
→ quantimama.com/take-the-leap

Come sit with us
Our Cuppa, Conversation & Connection circles run monthly about birth and homeschooling. You’ll find the humans you’ve been looking for.
→ Upcoming dates at quantimama.com/events

Follow along on IG, YouTube & FB—search @quantimama and come say "howdy".

Chapters

• 2:36 The Importance of De-schooling Parents
• 3:15 Kerri's Experience: Choosing to Homeschool
• 9:15 Questioning Qualifications: Are Parents Qualified?
• 17:01 Learning Needs: How Will They Learn Everything?
• 24:21 Addressing Resistance: What If My Child Resists?
• 33:03 Socialisation: What About Friendships?
• 40:14 Overcoming Fear: What If I Mess It Up?
• 46:01 Empowered Parenting: The Journey Forward

Transcript

0:05

in a maths class. I mean, I do basic maths, you know, I can do budgeting, I can do my tax, all that sort of stuff now, so I'm not completely, you know, useless in that area. But I sat there in the class and the teacher was giving instructions and it's like, I don't know how to help these kids. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not following you. And I felt like this adult student in this class with these grade sixes going, ugh. And it put so much fear into me. Like, I just felt absolutely out of my mind with fear and anxiousness and worry that I was going to be seen as not understanding. And so when you get those little feelings, it made me think about what other kids are in Hello, quanta folks, and welcome to another episode of Alchemising Education, our little sister podcast to fark the shorts. I am Jodi from Hello. Hello. Hi. I feel Many may not remember that. You're showing your age. No, and possibly it's Well, possibly, but also like where we're from in terms of maybe it was a Victorian ad. No idea. Yes, but it's well loved, not. Well, completely off topic. We were talking yesterday about all the ads we remember and still reference. All the jingles that we used to love. Yeah. Completely not to do with today's topic. So today we are talking about taking the leap. And the reason why we're talking about taking the leap is obviously our signature. program for parents is called Take the Lead, which is all about, I guess, getting clear on whether changing your kid's education is right for you. It's predominantly a de-schooling the parent program, isn't it? We sort of use the kids as a Trojan horse, but essentially that's what's happening, is as parents we look at our belief systems and how we can support our kids and be clear about what we're doing. So a bit of a shameless reference to our program, but we actually thought it might be useful to actually have a conversation about it because we are Take We really are. And I think in the people who have taken the program and the people who are interested in it, there's lots of different reasons why they come across our path. But it really is supportive of. A very big process, when it's going against society's norm, even if we feel like things aren't working for us, it's a very big leap of faith, and one that we can wholeheartedly, hand on heart, say is so worth it, even And look, the reason why we called it Take the Leap is literally we wrote this program as we went through the process. So we have lived and breathed it, so we actually know the value and we know how important it is that when you're looking to change your child's education, whether that's wholesale or just a little bit for an interim period or for a forever change, these are really valuable techniques and tools to go through. But what I want to do, is obviously put Kez in the hot seat, because I love that space for her. She loves it quietly too, she just won't admit it. We're actually going to talk about taking the leap and what that has been like for us. I think some reflection there, but we're also going to talk to the top five concerns on why parents are resistant to taking the leap. Kez is not even aware of these. She tried the, just let me know what those. We don't do that here. I've barely looked at them. I mean, I've researched it, but I've barely looked at them because we're going to talk to those as take the leap graduates. So we can offer a perspective on what our idea is around that as a question, which feels so potent and so consuming. before you move through this, before you move through discomfort. So while I'm getting those questions up, why don't you give us a little bit of your experience in Choosing to take the leap like was there one moment that made you decide to you know Upend your Yeah, son wasn't well It was driven by my son, but it was also driven by my daughter It was also driven by just what was going on in society And I sort of had a few I was very curious about it. I I wanted to be open-minded I wanted to think about what it was that we were creating for our children. You know what we wanted for our kids and And I just started to sort of think about the fact that we have, as parents, given our power away to other people. to raise our children and to influence our children, and I went, I actually want to take some of that back. And I wanted to sort of start to say we've got a bit of a belief that we can actually do it. And yeah, I think it was really looking first of all at my daughter who, you know, overall great student. loved school but was just, you know, on a downward spiral. And then my son who's kind of going, oh, this is just not really much fun. And so I just had to question it. I had to get curious, I had to get open-minded. So that was really, I wanted to know, well, what is the process? What do I need to think about? Why do we school? Why do we send them to school? And what do we want? It does pull that thread of curiosity in society's jumper, doesn't it? Because when you start pulling that thread, you're like, huh, what about this? And what about that? And yeah, I mean, it can snowball, or it can not. But I feel like for us, same thing. And it's really funny, because I could not have predicted that the Out of our four kids, the quanta kid that would lead us choosing to homeschool would have been our fiery youngest because obviously I was in the habit of breaking my children's spirits so they would actually do what I want, you know, successful parenting. on the superficial level, obviously creating a whole lot of work for the psychologist later on in life, you know, circular system. Keeping everyone employed. Keeping everyone employed. But yeah, he led the charge and I was like, oh, there's no wiggle room on this. And obviously we'll talk to, I guess, what it's like now and why we're so passionate about exploring this. Our program, as we've talked about, and we are not here to recruit you to homeschooling. We are here to talk to that voice inside of you that is feeling all the feels that we squash down day after day, and we never give oxygen to because it feels too big, but it's not, and it warrants examination, doesn't it? Okay, you're going to love this first one. Oh, am I? Great. Let's go. So, number one for the top five questions on whether to take the leap or not is... What Oh, I do love this question. Oh, yes. Do you know what I was thinking about, though, the other day is that I think people feel that they have to replace a teacher, that we have to be the teacher. We definitely do not. We are not taking that role. And I know when we did the remote learning, I realised exactly what was going on then and I thought, well, if we're going to homeschool, we're not doing any of that. We're not doing any of that. So, I just feel like Everyone's qualified because you know your kids best. And what is the beautiful opportunity of it is that you get to know them even better. You get to really start to understand what motivates and what lights them up. And you can be part of that. You actually get to be part of it. You get to facilitate it. You get to actually be part of the the learning process and sometimes you're learning alongside them. Yeah. So it's showing this collaboration around the learning process, not just that, you know, the person up the front of the classroom giving all the instructions and then giving the worksheet at Especially when they're sort of getting success or their eyes are lighting up or they're kind of, you know, or the lights are coming on or, you know, it's just, it's quite remarkable and We do not have to be qualified in the traditional sense. To be honest, teachers are qualified to teach, as in impart information, but they're not experts on everything. They're general practitioners in that sense. Often, they'll get the curriculum and be one or two steps ahead of the kids. They'll have maybe an adult knowledge base on a certain curriculum. There'll be things that come easier to them than the kids, obviously. If we're talking primary, then the basics need to be experienced for those kids, and they need to get a familiarity. I think about high school, and I think some of those kids are probably more versed in those subject matters than the adults who are supervising them. there's this power in being assigned as the teacher identity, then we don't tend to question that. But definitely, when remote learning came into our household and I had an awareness, I was like, whoa, I can do this. This is straightforward. This is literally worksheets from a third party and we're just working through them. And I think now that with obviously thinking about our high vibe AI conversation that we had a few podcasts ago, the potential of learning how to communicate with these AI agents is a game changer for anyone wanting to home educate their kids or just reduce the pressure on what's happening for our kids because I think sometimes we get caught up in am I qualified, am I not qualified, but one thing you are qualified to do is make decisions for your child because you know them the best. You see personality changes, you see them perhaps being worn down by anxiety and stress. You know that that's not a pathway to health or a thrive state and so you are absolutely qualified to ask those questions and And help the kids do that for themselves. That's the other part of it is that you can witness where they are in overwhelm or where they're feeling really tired or they're just not enjoying the topic and you can pivot with them or you can empower them to make their own decisions. Okay, how are you feeling today? Is this really what you want to be doing? And I know that there's times that we don't always have a choice around what we do. Sometimes we just have to get shit done, right? Yeah, completely. But I think there is value in allowing them to say, I want to learn more about this, or hang on, I'm ready to move on to something else. And so to give them that ability to control their own learning at Oh, I love that. You know, something that happened this morning that really is relevant to this, and this is why I'm saying I've healed myself from needing to be qualified per se. is that QK2 said, okay, I want to do something that looks like schoolwork. And I'm like, sure, okay, fine, we'll call it that. Anyway, so she's doing a report. And I said, what do you want to do the report on? Well, she said, give me the questions first and then I'll decide. And I'm like, no, no, that's not how this works. you decide on the subject matter, because you get to decide what you're interested in diving in deeper on, and then we'll create some interesting questions. And of course, I was working on the premise of, you know, a bit of recruitment of ChatGPT to assist in this, because in fact, when you understand how to communicate with ChatGPT, it's an amazing ally. Again, not a sales thing for ChatGPT, but I'm like, holy smokes, it is helpful. So it's making this job a lot easier, but I could have done it myself too. I digress. So, she's gone, okay, well, I want to research Aphrodite. I'm like, shit, I know nothing about Greek mythology. In fact, I wouldn't even know if it was Greek, Norse, or Egyptian mythology, to be honest. But the other kids are interested anyway. So we go through the process with QK2. We get 10 really juicy, interesting questions, not your bog standard, you know, when did this happen? What was this related to? None of that stuff. We're talking how does this relate to society? How does that make you feel? And all the questions I love asking, because I said to the kids, You need to consume the information, but then you need to work out what you think about that, what rings true for you, because we are raising, to borrow a term from Parents with Questions and Adam Gibson, uncoercible children. They need to marry all this stuff based on what they think, and it might be right, it might be wrong, but I said to her, look, you can't get the answer wrong. We got a little bit further down the track and we hit a roadblock. Of course, I've got no idea about stuff. I'm like, let's research it. Anyway, QK3's listening in the back. He loves this stuff. He absolutely loves Greek mythology, right? And I hadn't even thought to call on him and he's like, oh, it's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and blah, blah, blah, blah, and blah, blah, blah. And so we both got schooled in that moment. But one thing I wanted to say was that if I had Zoom back four years got stuck on the idea that I wasn't qualified, I would have missed out on the magic of that moment where I got to see one sibling imparting information and lighting up the other sibling. It wasn't even an age thing because QK3 is younger than QK2, but he got to explain his passion, his interest to her and get her interested. Oh my God, she'd kill me if I shared it. But the stuff she shared on her reflection was epic. And I was like, this is what I'm after. So I guess in a very long winded way, that's been my experience of am I qualified? How could I miss this stuff is my answer to it. How could I miss these rich moments? And because of the efficiency of learning at home, We smashed that out in an And then the kids get to go and do learning by fun way, you know. QK2's busy doing chemistry and food tech right now as she makes our dinner. Yay. Go girl. Yeah, so I think it's really awesome to kind of, I guess just look at those and just think how can I reimagine this as an idea and this idea of qualification, which is really so linked to the permission-based It is, as we know. And I just want to just say there... you know, just that collaboration that took place in that moment, and the fact that what we are doing is we are raising lifelong learners so that they know that they can learn from anyone at any time. So you're witnessing that and you're creating that for them, which is amazing. Yeah, and I want to I mean, we're learning all the time, aren't we? So, you know, I just kind of think this ability to kind of model that and say, It doesn't stop when you get to, say, end of high school or uni time. Literally, you just And it's so empowering. But we love that. We love that. It's what lights us up. You're right, it doesn't stop at year 12. Okay. Go on to Mama Kerri. How will they learn everything they need to know? That's the worst. I know, I feel like all these like a laughing yoga invitation. I mean... According to whom? What the? What the? I know. Like, who knows what you need to know until you're in the moment, right? Like, again, I was thinking about this the other day, like the curriculum that is set up for the schooling environment, like, Who says that that's what they need to know? Most of it we Even the basics, as we've talked about, you don't come out of school knowing how to do your tax. Absolutely. That's exactly right. That becomes real as soon as you start working. Absolutely. Even if you're doing a part-time job. Suddenly you've got this life skill. You can argue until you're blue in the face about whether it's legitimate. It's like something that we essentially agree to do, and living in society, and there's no framework for learning that. I'm like, I think I did some accounting in high I can't really remember it, other than I was really crap at touch typing and Apparently. I have no idea. I mean, we're talking like I just wonder, like, who dictates and who is the who's the most qualified, but no, who is it that needs to determine what they've got to know in a period of time? I just think about recently when Jill was talking about her education and how she said that she I think McGill was much the same too in terms of the way he would right Yeah, right, okay. So you kind of go, well, we can still learn those things later in life, whatever it is that's going to be relevant to the path that we end up going on. So what we're doing, I think, within a curriculum-based schooling environment is that we're giving them everything that someone else thinks they need to know. But really what I think is going to be most empowering is to learn as you go and to determine as you're going what that child needs or is interested in. And they will learn to do math and science and all of those other things intertwined with those topics as they show interest in them. So I just kind of go the value of the home learning environment is that you get to decide the topic in that moment, and then you just intertwine all the things that you feel that might be relevant for them. But we can't know what we want to know in the future. Like, gosh, if I look back at what I learned at school versus what But the thing that we're doing now, and I think this is where I really want to encourage people to look around them, because we know that there's a whole bunch of intelligent people listening to this conversation and starting to relate it to their life. Look at how you learn things. Do you learn things in context or out of context? Because that's my experience now, is that we learn in context, and in fact, we learn, learn, learn, learn, learn until we hit a saturation point or a satiation point. And the difference of those two things is saturation, you've got all the information you can basically take on board and you need to assimilate it, right, or create understanding and internalise it. The satiation point is you've hit the point of knowing what you need to know in order to do what you want to do. Yesterday, McGill and I are on the tools, because we love that. That's one of our bonding things, to shoot shit with power tools. Why would you use a hand screwdriver if you could use a battery-operated one? That's my belief in life. So much faster. And satisfying. Anyway, one of the kids, we basically enticed him outside, because we were like, seriously, you're turning into an emo, or whatever the current term is now. I felt like it was way too much black being worn, way too much time inside. I'm like, you're starting to look pasty, let's go outside, get some sun, get some fresh air. And he's like, no, no help. And I'm like, all right, we're going to take our time and explain what we're doing. Anyway, what naturally happened was obviously safety conversation about using the power tools, but then also consideration of angles, measurements, working out spacing so that things would be structurally correct and, you know, engineered to a satisfactory level. And it was such a relevant conversation for him. He got all of that stuff and it was all math related. Amazing. But all the different kind of parts of math but in a really practical sense because by the end of it we had something to show for it, you know. And I just think how often is it that we are expecting kids to absorb information that somehow will serve them later on, like I'm thinking like Pythagoras theorem and stuff like that. If you learn that on a building site, completely different scenario than learning it in the classroom and answering some, they're probably on computers now, but you know, They might do some practical stuff, but it's not the same as building stuff. And even this opportunity for lateral learning, like I think about woodwork. Why wasn't woodwork basically math? Because it actually is. When you're building stuff, it really is all math. So, I just kind of think what happens when you think about ways to learn and will they learn enough? You need to think more laterally about it and there are so many things that we learn in school. I remember when our boys were starting out their business and we were kind of going, crap, they're not doing any report writing and stuff. And they ended up writing a business plan and doing a business presentation. All of that was like a massive, I mean, that feels like a million years ago. It does feel, I've forgotten about it, yes. Yeah, but that was one of the things I thought, oh, it was when the penny dropped and we'd gone, okay, well, you need to write a business plan, you need to write a proposal, you need to write you know, a request if you're looking for support with this business. And the penny dropped for me and I was like, ah, this is like report writing But it had real relevance and they had skill in the game. Had real meaning. Yep, absolutely. And they had to present that. Yeah. They had to take it into almost a boardroom environment and present it. And they were confident with it because they believed in But they also got examined on that. And by way of being examined was the level of success that they actually got out of their meeting. So now you're talking relevant assessments as well, not just So good. Okay, this one's a little bit of an interesting one and I think that I can probably talk to this a little bit more than you can because I've had it in my household, but the question is, what if my child resists? What Yeah, you've had a lot more experience in that. But look, if I start off, I really feel like you've got to try and understand where the resistance is coming from and understand just have you approached it from the right angle. Sometimes it takes a few goes to make things happen. It may not happen straight away. you just keep going at it from different angles or you give it a break and you go maybe that's not the way it's meant to be, maybe it's something else. So I think again when you compare the homeschool environment to the mainstream schooling is that they don't have that ability to be as flexible and to come back and to try it a different way. In this case, you can actually appeal to the individual student and what it is that's going to work for them. But there will be resistance, and there is always resistance. But in school, you're It's actually about compliance and conformity, and actually doing it on a timely manner as well, so there's no spaciousness to And that comes with the stress, and that's where the stress starts to build, and the anxiousness starts to build. lack of belief in their ability starts to I think it's a total erosion of the individual. Naturally, What do you think? I've got a couple of thoughts around this. there will be resistance because this is uncomfortable and it's new. One of the things that I've talked about for a long time and we really do have a focus on in Take the Leap program, unabashed reference again, is that You need to factor in that if this kid has had any stress, they need a circuit breaker. And a circuit breaker is you do sweet FA for a period of time and for me it became clearer and clearer that that period of time was dictated by the kids. And so they all came in at varying times and some of it was kind of this self-shaming thing of going, I probably need to learn something. I'm like, okay, your choice, just so you know. The other side of it was they'd come in, they'd go, I'm bored. And I'm like, well, only boring people are bored. So, you know, you have the flexibility and the agility to learn whatever you're interested in. So, you know, that can be anything. But, I mean, I've said this many times before, our kids spend an impolite amount of time listening to audio books. And I've actually lost count. It could be four to five months, or it could be 18. I've actually lost track. It was It's irrelevant though, right? It doesn't matter. Because Quantiquid 2 came to you, and they do come to you and say, I Yes, that's right. Well, that's where she started writing her book. And I mean, the thing is, I've got to reflect on the fact that we started, we changed her education, and she essentially was not reading. But more than that, she thought she was dumb as dog shit. And I'm like, That is the greatest. Tragedy for a child to think that they are dumb because they are not they just aren't smart by someone else's measure, but this kid is Intuitive and she's articulate and she's writing books now like yeah, that's been her thing now I'm not saying she's gonna get published and people gonna read them, but the level of creativity and the The thing that's coming from her is a choice to use her own voice, which I absolutely love right so Yes, there will be resistance. Expect that. But these kids have had an erosion of trust that has been built into them for many, many years. So just like any psych and their patient, you must re-establish trust. That is critical, absolutely critical in the process. When you think about a parent, you want to have trust with your kid. You want your kid to know they can come to you. Not that you're dictatorial and you're going to stomp out any flame that they have just to get them to comply. because that is what is happening in households everywhere right now. This school resistance and these kids saying no, no, no, no, or not right now, and it being just squashed and ridden over all the time. Now, I'll tell you right now, I suspect there'll be many kids that won't know how to say no to peer pressure. when the time comes because they haven't had experiences of their being able to use their voice. Absolutely. I agree. Totally. And look, if this makes you uncomfortable, in the most loving way, good. Because it's wrong. It is wrong to force our will on other people. Now, there are times as a parent where I pull the parenting card off. So this is before, right? Of course. Otherwise, we would have bloody pizza for dinner every And we'd all feel sick. Yes. And sometimes I let that play out and sometimes I don't. But mostly I pull the parenting card on that stuff. No, you may not drive the car, you don't have a license yet. Like, you know, obvious things like that, you pull the parenting card. But where there is spaciousness to enable a different way for the excuse me, the experience or the whatever to unfold, whatever that might be. Where there is an opportunity, then I love doing that because it just takes away that constant momentum of do, do, do, do, do, and it brings in the being, which is a richness. I don't even think I can possibly articulate to people what that's like Absolutely, but just to see when they get lit up by something and just to see their confidence build because I do know there are a lot of kids out there who are resisting learning and should they ever come back to wanting to learn again, you know, when they finish year 12 or whatever year they get to. It could take them a long time to ever feel confident enough to want to learn at their pace, in their way, giving themselves permission to say, this is what I want. Because a And I really would encourage you to think about times where you've been super stressed and just think if you actually learnt anything in that moment. I mean certainly the way the brain works with stress hormones, you turn off your learning centres. So it makes no sense that stressed kids learn, they just are basically being babysat for And it sticks with you again, because I think about when I did some parent helper in grade six in a maths class. I mean, I do basic maths. I can do budgeting, I can do my tax, all that sort of stuff now. So I'm not completely useless in that area. But I sat there in the class, and the teacher was giving instructions. And it's like, I don't know how to help these kids. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not following you. And I felt like this adult student in this class with these grade sixes going, And it put so much fear into me, like I just felt absolutely out of my mind with fear and anxiousness and worry that I was going to be seen as not understanding. And so when you get those little feelings, it made me think about what other kids are in this class that might be feeling the same as me and Yeah, because probably you would have been fine in there, but it's like this old belief system that raises its ugly, uninvited Absolutely. Absolutely. That's right. I'm in deep water here. I'm unqualified. It's like, why didn't I figure out what subject I was going to be helping in before I agreed to this parent-helper slot? Yes, that's right. Yes. Next time, choose interpretive Yeah, exactly. Exactly. All right, so you'll love the next one, and I obviously always am very opinionated with the next one. So the next one is basically what about socialisation? What about social circles and friendships and things I think, again, we've got to go lateral and think about where do we socialise? What does that actually look like? Where are we getting that socialisation skills from? A I mean, you actually get along with the family. It really is. Totally. And if you learn to communicate clearly and you learn to find out how to problem solve together or how to compromise or how to work together and taking responsibility, it's all of that. Sometimes you're the leader, sometimes you're the follower. It really does begin at home. It's like how many people do you need to interact with in order to actually get those skills? Do you need to interact with 100 kids? No, you actually only need one or two really good positive interactions, and you get it. You get the lesson really quickly. Then, of course, it takes maybe, if you want to, one or two activities in the week and that again with people outside of your family is enough to understand what socialising Yeah, I mean, I've said it before, I think kids are over-socialised these days, or over-scheduled. They must be bloody exhausted. I And exhausted, but also just, where do they get to just sit with themselves? I was talking to a student just yesterday, doing year 12, and she was sort of worried that she wasn't socialising enough with all of her cohort. But she was okay with that. I said, well, that's amazing. If you're happy with that, you don't have to be out there always socialising. It is actually really healthy, really positive to just sometimes sit and be on your own. The socialising thing is not overrated, but there's too much of an Oh, I just don't think it's necessary. In fact, I know that I've shared this with you before, but my fridge magnet when I was a teenager was I don't need a certain number of friends. I need a number of friends I can be certain of. And what I've seen without trying to curate my kids, because in fact one thing I decided not to do when we moved to this home education model was I decided not to force social engagements. Like, we do none. So, as in... Well, that's not true. No, no. As in, we do none that are generated by me. I don't go and catch up with people so the kids can have a play. It's all based on what the kids drive, right? So, we have one thing that we do that's a weekly thing with our homeschool peeps. But even that, which we call Wacky Wednesday because we're all about the fun, but even Wacky Wednesday was born from the mothers wanting to get together so they can have decent conversation. We go to a park, the kids run amok for two hours, basically leave us alone if we feed them enough. and so we can actually have high vibe conversations. But there are only cool people in there. Like it's a cool people zone And it's actually student-led anyway, because the kids are all on this particular little group saying, where are we going tomorrow, everybody? Who Well, that's what's morphed out of that, right? And in fact, they're not the same age. Like the age range, when we started, the age range was like five through to 15 or something like that. So it was a big range and basically it looked like a big extended family like you would if you were hanging out with your cousins. So there's something really beautiful about that because the little kids get to hang out with slightly bigger kids or much bigger kids. The big kids get to mentor the younger kids. And there's this beautiful cross-pollination that reflects society. Nowhere else in society, certainly once you get into the workplace, are you hanging out with 30 people your age. And in This is what I was hearing yesterday in relation to this. It's like the whole way through the schooling years, this particular girl has felt like she's never really belonged. So you kind of think, so for six years she's been navigating that and questioning herself around that. I think about when you finish school and when you go out into the workplace and you go and do different things, you are mixing with multiple ages. So this whole need to have everybody at the same level is not a guarantee that people are going to get along or And I think also with what you're saying and probably why she's done fairly well is that, as in she's sated by not doing the shoulds of having a shit ton of friends around you, is that when you know that your voice has relevance and, you know, it is welcomed, you don't need a lot of people around you because you're speaking your mind, you're speaking your truth. And so it doesn't get drowned out. And that in itself really just beautifully meets that belonging and significance that we all need. And so for a kid, they don't need a lot of people around them. And it's funny, I started working that out. I gave my kids one or two decent size birthday parties, and I think more so they went to them. This doesn't look right. So, two of the kids in particular would lose the plot if they had, say, more than who was in their family at their birthday and they'd go off in a half or tears or whatever during the birthday party and I realised it was actually really overwhelming for them. to be with kids and so there's so much of this as parents we put on kids going oh they'll love it and they'll know how much I love It's a big responsibility for those young kids to hold making sure because they want everyone to enjoy themselves and suddenly they feel this massive burden, the overwhelm. The overwhelm is huge and we just don't understand that. So I just wonder if we've been getting it wrong and we've been applying this sort of adult lens to it, but no one's actually asked the kids and you don't even have to ask them, you just give them different experiences and see what they're like. More than that, see what they're like afterwards. Because if they have no capacity for anything and anyone, they are just done and they're really ready and it's arsenic hour, as they call it. If you're having that experience and that's a child in overwhelm, so probably that was not a nourishing environment for them. It needed to be tweaked in some way. And it leads in beautifully to the last of the top five questions, which is, what if I mess it up? Oh, my God. I Moving on. Do you know what? I'm going to say this one thing. I keep looking at anyone who has chosen an alternative path for their child's education. They never regret it. They might pivot a few times to finally get to the right point, but on the whole, they're in charge. They get the choice. I'm talking about homeschooling as such, but even if you went to different models, You know, the kids are happy. The kids come out. Once they re-establish trust, it's a totally different scenario. Once they re-establish trust and they feel like they're back in control of their learning and they're doing things that engage them and they feel that belonging and significance, they are grateful. for the opportunity to have stepped away from You don't see them going back into the system. There's not many people that are getting in touch for a refund. No, that's right. They're really not. Exactly. There's that, but that's not a reason to say you need to take the leap. The other thing is that none of this is permanent. Like, you literally Exercise that right. But there is an agility in here, and sometimes all kids need is a circuit breaker. Sometimes they need a change of school environment. Sometimes they need to experience what the alternative options are. But the other thing is, In the home ed kind of environment, There is a shit ton of ways to do it. You can go academic, you can go fully managed programs, you can do slightly managed and have a tutor in there, you can go student-led and unschooling, you can do de-schooling, you can do activities-based. I mean, there are so many options. And then when you get to high school age, There's not a barrier. You can actually start taking uni courses Yep. So early. So suddenly you skip a lot of this need to do say the year 11, year 12 subjects that are such a barrier for university, it is not the case. You just don't know it. So, there are plenty of options in terms of that. There's something really powerful when we get to adjust what is the accepted model, and if you need a reason then just stop at your child and their welfare and just look at what your options are and give consideration. There will always be challenges, like balancing work around home education is Oh The kids get it though. Yeah, they do. It's just about boundary setting. It is. It's just about providing a structure. It's just about making sure they know where's a place of rest or where's a place of stretch. It's just about setting them up for Being more adaptable, being more flexible, being I mean that is all part of it. So it is the ebb and flow and it is really fine because I think we over service kids. We provide so much for them these days and we don't let them luxuriate in discomfort anymore. And I'm not talking about being abusive, but I'm talking about a little bit of trying to work it out themselves, not saving them at the first pass, not providing the solutions immediately. You know, giving them some spaciousness to be curious and find out what that looks Yeah, and to feel for it themselves because that's where their power comes from. is when they do get to sit in that discomfort, knowing that it will pass, but knowing that they'll find the answers from within. Yeah, that navigation is just, we rob kids of We really do. misstep in my opinion because I can see what happens when you stop doing that for kids and how You know letting them find that opportunity to express themselves The potency of that is you know, we're on the other side of it and it's magical and I just keep stretching them now and In a really loving way, but I stretch them And I guess the difference also, if I now think about it, is that you're the one constant. Absolutely. what happens often for kids is they find some really good teachers and then they find some really bad ones. Or some that they really connect to and some that they don't. So I shouldn't say good and bad, but just it's about that connection point. And so that can make, that can really turn them upside down and can lead them down the wrong path. Whereas if you're that constant that they trust and that they know they will be stretched in and that they will be expected and asked to do that, but that they know that they will be safe and they won't be assessed and they won't be kicked out or they won't be given a grade that they have to then go home to their parent and explain, that constant is Yeah, we're definitely in the category of people who No, and I keep saying, I think if you've got a child who is not thriving in that environment, I mean, do we want them to not thrive? Even then, my It's kind of funny. I mean, I really want people to know I was a moderate and I loved the idea of school, but I'm on the other side. Excuse me. I'm on the other side of it, and I now appreciate how much richer my relationship is with each child. They're into relationships with each other as well, and with McGill. I couldn't have predicted that. I literally couldn't. The thing that has been the center point for that change is me shifting my beliefs. Like They really aren't. It's always the parents. It's always us. And this is why the program that we have, another plug, not intended, but it really does help you understand what your role is in their education. and what our beliefs and our expectations and our experiences, how much they influence what we expect of them when it comes to their education. work that out and once you sort of say, hang on, is that what I really want for my children? Is that the values that I want them to obtain at the end of it? Are they the skill sets that I want them to have in order to thrive at life? We can do that ourselves. In fact, that is the gift of being a parent. We Absolutely, and I think this is a framework for empowered parenting. It is the new version of empowered parenting. I talk about empowered birth and I say that Once you've had an empowered birth, you will never give that opportunity away ever, ever again. In fact, you might have more babies so you can have more empowered births, and that's a little bit of an issue. That is an issue. But the point is that once you've experienced empowered parenting, You won't go back. It is the very fabric of Yeah, really. And it's rewarding beyond measure. Yep. And I think just those connections that you develop that are lifelong are just, I mean, check back in in 20 years, my kids might hate me and then I'll be able to go, oh, misstep. Yep. Should have left them in the institution, should, intentionally planted Yeah, it's a great gift when you can actually be part of that, that part of their life, because before you And they're just... Baby birds are out of the hunt. They're flying, you know, and so it is a very small period of time. It really is. Because we're going to have long, healthy lives. Yes. And we Yeah, that's right. Yeah, all the other stuff fades away when you just soak in this richness. Thank you, Quantifolks, for joining us for this conversation. Obviously, we hope that it has just given you a pause for thought around what your options are. You won't know until you experience it yourself. We do our very best to shop authentically and speak with loving honesty and so if that has resonated then you will know somewhere in your body there is a registration of the truth and perhaps something that's something Absolutely and and again please reach out like you know ask us some questions yeah reach out and you know find out what's going on and and you know we're really we would love to have further conversations so yeah. That's what we're here for. That's what we're here for. The ripple effect. Definitely. Beautiful Quanti-folks until next time I get to have this beautiful woman Alongside me, we Hey, Quantifolks. You know, the conversations that we have about alchemising education are underpinned by our amazing Take the Leap course for parents, which is all about de-schooling the parents. If you're keen to deep dive more, then check out the quantimama.com website and find the Take the Leap course. This course is beautiful because it will give you an opportunity to examine where your programs are, where you're creating, limiting beliefs and expectations for your child. And it ultimately frees you to be the best advocate for your child that you can be. And that's all of us can ever want for our children. Just to love, nurture and watch them become the most incredible individuals that we already know them to be. For more info, head