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50 Things to Do in Baby's First Year | The Dude Mom Amanda Rodriguez | MomCave LIVE

• Mom Cave Jen / Amanda Rodriguez

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Prepare for a laugh-out-loud journey through motherhood with Mom Cave's Jen and Amanda Rodriguez, the brilliant mind behind "50 Things to Do in Baby's First Year." In their discussion, they'll share Amanda's personal experiences of raising her three children (now 21, 18, and 15 years old) and the ups and downs of parenthood. Their must-read book is brimming with hilarious stories, clever illustrations, and practical advice on how to maintain your sanity during your baby's first year. Discover how to balance your relationships, keep the spark alive, and hold onto your humanity amidst the chaos. This survival guide is a must-have for new moms who want to keep it real and find humor in the madness of motherhood!

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Jen:  So, welcome to Momcave Live, where we may have lost our minds, but we haven't lost our sense of humor yet. I'm Jen from Momcave, and my guest to hang out with us tonight is Amanda, who is @thedudeMom. Hey, Amanda. 

Amanda:  Hello. Thank you for having me

Jen:  Of course. So, dude mom makes me assume that you have dudes as opposed to dudettes in your life. Is that it? 

Amanda: That is an accurate but funny story. I have had people email me and like see, like little pitches or something. They're like, Oh, hey, dude, you see that as my name. And I even had somebody once think that I was a dude who was a mom. So clarify, I am not a dude. I am a mom.

Jen:  Yes, right. But you did tell me you're from California originally. So that's very like dude, like, yeah. Cool. So I heard about your book. And I thought that would be fun to talk about. So, everybody, Amanda has a book, which I could probably put on the screen at some point. But we'll get to that. It's on Amazon, of course, where all the books are. And tell us about the book, what's it called, and what's in it.

Amanda:  It's 50 Things to Do in Baby's first year. And it is a book that is written more, not from like, the 50 Like milestones that you need to cover as a parent or anything. It's more about keeping your sanity as a mom, and yeah, that you should do to maintain yourself and your humanity because I don't know about the rest of you guys, but that my mother, my early mothering days nearly snatched the humanity away from me...

Read more at https://www.momcavetv.com/50-first-things-to-do-in-babies-first-year-amanda-rodriq

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Welcome to momcave live where we may have lost our minds, but we haven't lost our senses of humor yet. I'm Jen from mom cave and my guest to hang out with us tonight is Amanda who is at the dude mom. Hey, Amanda.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Hello. Thank you for having me

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

of, of course. So, the dude, mom makes me assume that you have dudes as opposed to do that in your life.

Amanda Rodriguez:

That is accurate, but funny story. I have had people email me and like see, like little pitches or something. They're like, Oh, hey, dude. Usually, my name right. And I even had somebody once think that I was a dude who was a mom. So well. To clarify. I am not a dude. I am a mom.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

You're a mom. Yes. Right. But you did tell me you're from California originally. So that's very like dude, like, yeah. Cool. So I heard about your book. And I thought that would be fun to talk about. So everybody, Amanda has a book, which I could probably put on the screen at some point. But we'll get to that. It's on Amazon, of course, where all the books are. And tell us about the book, what's it called, and what's in it.

Amanda Rodriguez:

It's 50 Things to Do in baby's first year. And it is a book that is written more not from like, the 50. Like milestones that you need to cover as a parent or anything. It's more about keeping your sanity as a mom and yeah, that you should do to maintain yourself and your humanity because I don't know about the rest of you guys, but that my my mother, my early mothering days nearly snatched the humanity away from me. You know, keeping yourself mentally physically emotionally attached to your partner managing like all of the other relationships that having a baby throws into disarray at times. And really just like focusing on being your best self while also being the best mom that you can be. But tons of humor thrown in some, you know, funny illustrations not done by me than by an illustrator.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Nice, nice.

Amanda Rodriguez:

It's just a lot of humor, little side stories, anecdotes, stuff like that. So

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

that's what we're all about here on mom cave, you know about the humor, because that's really the way that I deal with stuff. Otherwise.

Amanda Rodriguez:

I'm not laughing I'm crying

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

You're a little further down this parenting role than I am. So how old are your children?

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yeah, two of them, I guess can't be classified as children anymore because I have a 21 year old an 18 year old and a 15 year old now. Yeah, my 18 year old is a senior this year. And my 15 year old is a freshman my 21 year old is in college so

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Okay, sidenote, you look amazing to have children that so I don't know like if you had them when you're chatting but you love

Amanda Rodriguez:

I did it sunscreen.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Sunscreen. But yeah. I also

Amanda Rodriguez:

I consider myself an indoors man in indoors woman. Like you I don't get a lot of

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

keeps you young. I actually made a video this week for a brand. I won't say who it is because the videos not out yet. But they do like UV protective stuff. And the joke was like, I don't want to dress like Morticia Addams at the beach is how I end up dressing. Oh, that's great. Anyway, no wrinkles, no. Anything, anything to stop the wrinkles. So the age spots. I had my kids a little later, I have my kids in my mid 30s. So they're still young ones pretty much. I've got a seven year old and a 12 year old. But I love the fact that you have this book about the 50 things that every parent should do the first year that they are parent and that you've come out you've kind of come out the other end. So like whatever the advice was, it might be pretty good because I survived. You survived. Your kids survived. They grew up yeah, you're still here. You're still laughing and you look fab. So

Amanda Rodriguez:

I would say it and I wrote this book in 2019. Literally, like right before the pandemic happened. My book came out on December 31 2019. Wow. Which was like the most random date and like the publisher came with that date. I was like, who's gonna be paying attention? A baby book on New Year's Eve. But yeah, we had this plan about you know, I had book like Conversation set up at different bookstores like in the DC area and all that kind of stuff. And then the global pandemic came along, and I never did a single books. I had my book release party, like I had like a launch party in January of 2020. And you know, that was great. It was, you know, lots of people came out, whatever. And that was like the last time I saw anybody in person for a long time so, but I will say that at that time, my kids were older. So I feel like when I wrote that book, I actually wrote that book at an AAU basketball tournament in Florida. Yeah, they were like, the deadlines were super tight. And they were like, well, you know, you want to publish the book, we have to have it done at this time. So I remember saying, like, well, I have this vacation plan, and they're like, We really don't care. And so I was like, Well, I can do this, I'm gonna go to Florida. And I'll watch basketball tournaments, I'll take my laptop, I'll sit beside the swimming pool while the kids are swimming and doing all their thing. And I'm writing and I am sweating, both like drenched, I wanted to get in a pool so badly. I've never been so hot. But I gotta died. And I feel like I wrote it a time. Like, I feel like I could not have written this book. When my kids were toddlers, when they were babies for sure when they were toddlers, like I had to go through it and sort of get far enough removed from like, the trauma of early parenting, to sort of move it to a space and be like, well, here's what I wish I would have done. And here are the things that I think like, are realistic, because, you know, we all have read all these things about like, oh, you know, you have to put your mental health and like do all this, like, sure we all know those things. But at the same time, it's like actually doing that in the midst of having like a newborn and a two year old and a five year like, it's hard. So I really wanted to just focus on things that like you could do, and they're not, you know, have a cookie, you know, that's like nobody had to tell

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

me to have first year my baby was born or ever before after that, no. I already know about half the cookie. Like that's yes. That's my mantra.

Amanda Rodriguez:

And, like, you know, I remember reading this thing, I nursed all my kids. So I remember, you know, have a healthy snack while you're nursing. Like, why would I have a healthy snack? I mean, I get it. But also I'd rather have a chocolate chip cookie. It's the only time that kids not paying attention to me and trying to like bat the food out of my head. I'm enjoying my cookie. And I'm sorry if that means that the milk tastes like chocolate. I mean, maybe it's that's probably

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

probably my baby. Yeah. Yeah. And if if your baby is still at an age where they are not like eating cookies themselves, yeah. Then take advantage of that and have a cookie. Because as soon as they start eating the real food, like, your food's always cold, and they always want whatever you have,

Amanda Rodriguez:

right? Yes. I always say my foods always wet. Because Oh, I know. They want to taste it. And then they're like, oh, they put it back. And

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

you? No, no, I that's something nobody told me about. flops, saliva and not in the making of the baby. Works, right? Just,

Amanda Rodriguez:

yeah, it's not not.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Not fun swap swapping of saliva at all. What's one of the surprising things in the 50 things people should do?

Amanda Rodriguez:

Oh, um, oh, you caught me there? Because I don't. I don't know. I don't think anything is really surprising. I would say it's more things that you don't necessarily think about, like one of the tips is about mainly, being upfront with your in laws about the relationship that you know, you want to have with your new family. And I think that's a really hard thing. And something people don't really think about when you know, it's like, oh, everybody's happy the baby's coming. But like, do you want your in laws in the birthing room with you? Like, you need to have that discussion in advance if you don't, because it's otherwise? You know, and like really talking through how it not just like your in laws, but like talking to your partner about why that may or may not be something you want. I mean, some people want that, like it's a party and everybody can come but like for me, I was like, I don't know. An audience for this.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

You never know how it's getting go? No. Different families do you think so differently, and sometimes it doesn't become apparent, a parent that was like a little, little, it doesn't become apparent until you are a parent, that your spouse's family is totally weird, and different. Or in my case, my family is totally weird. And I never you know, it's just different. So yeah, just

Amanda Rodriguez:

to like think about that stuff. You know, before you have your first baby and then you're like, everybody's like, you know, you should you talk about what kind of a parent you want to be. We'll sure it but you don't talk about what kind of a parent you want your kind of a grandparent you want your in laws or your or your older parents to be. So, you know, the just thinking through some of those things and like trying to maintain those relationships because you know, your high emotion at that time your hormones are all out of whack and like, you know, you're crying and you're yelling, and you're happy and you're sad and like all that stuff. And then pairing it with the fact that you have all these other interpersonal relationships going on at the same time you just figure out

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

totally social media is full of young gorgeous women giving makeup tutorials, I guarantee you they've never tried putting their face on with a baby on one boob and another kid shooting Nerf guns at them. Moms want to look great, too, but we just don't have the time or the energy to put all that effort into it. Meet Mommy Makeup. Yep, it's a thing. Mommy. makeups motto is clean Beauty for Busy Women take advantage of their free color consultation programs. Send in your selfie and which products interest you and Mommy Makeup will reply back with shade suggestions and a $10 gift card to use towards your order. Mommy makeup.com/freecolor consultation promo code mom cave for 20% off your first order. Start your Mommy Makeup journey today. Or as soon as the kids go to bed. Um, one of the ones in there that I really like is put yourself in. I don't know how you phrased it, but put yourself in the picture. Make sure that you you're in the picture because we take so many pictures of our babies, and then pictures of our babies with other people. And then sometimes we're not in the pictures years later, there's not that many.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yeah, yeah. And I'm still sort of guilty of that, because I also owned a photography business. So I'm always one who's like, Give me the camera. Yeah, I'm not doing it. Right. But do you want the pictures to be good?

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

I understand. Totally.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Right. So I have to make an effort to get myself in pictures with my kids. And just even without my kids taking pictures. Yeah, I think like, the birth of Instagram really helped with that.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

I see. I feel like it kind of hurt me. Because now I'm like, Oh, if I take this picture, it's not gonna look good. Like, I'm sure it's on Instagram. Or, you know, I look so awful. There's no way I'm putting this picture on Instagram. So why you would take it but you know, yeah, just about that.

Amanda Rodriguez:

No, no, yeah, in Yeah, posting every picture. But like making sure. I mean, at this point, I feel like I'm to the point where not just actually being in the picture, but like printing the pictures. Because how i Looking back now, I don't think I've printed pictures for like, the last like five to seven years. So all the pictures I have of my kids. They're little and I'm younger, which no problem there. But you know, I haven't printed a picture recently. And I discovered we recently remodeled our basement. And so I'm down like going through all the photos. And I'm like, there's not a single picture from like high school from any of my kids. It's printed on my computer, and they're on Instagram, and they're on Facebook, but like, I don't have a physical copy of any of these pictures. So all of a, I have tons of these photo albums and all that filled with pictures of my kids and pictures of me. But from when they were little so

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

yeah, it's a different way than when we were growing up. Um, just because of the technology. But this this is not sponsored at all, but I have a solution. I have an app on my phone. It's called Chatbooks. I don't know. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So what you can do is like, you know, how you can put a heart a favorite of a picture, like, it pulls you just as you're, you know, going about your daily life, and you take pictures and you're like, that one's really good. You know, I'm gonna favorite that one. And then as soon as it gets enough to print and one of these little books, they just charge you 999 or whatever it is 19, ah I forget, it's not a lot. And they send you the book of all your favorites. And so like we have all these little, little books now and at least that way, like I get a physical copy of a picture. That's the only way because if I had to do it and like pick it and then go to Walgreens and up and do it.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Right, right, so So clearly, I'm not doing that clearly. But that

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

wasn't a commercial or anything.

Amanda Rodriguez:

But I have I have used chat books before. I think like when it first came out, I did like a sponsor thing with them. And I remember not favoriting but setting it up in a certain way where like after I got to a certain number of pictures just printed them. And it is like the most random array of what was I thinking.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Yeah, because you know, it's like think about the things we take photos of parking space. So we remember it at the airport. A book full of those. Yeah, we have mommy and color TVs watching us and she says Hello ladies. Am I late to the party? You're never late. It's always a party. Always party. Better late than Never right? Only moms can have a party at quarter of eight It's not even, like, you know, real party time. I am talking with Amanda who is the dude, Mom, I'm gonna put her book in the comments. It's baby's first year 50 things that every mom should do. I think it went to the comments. Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes this thing is, is rough. If it doesn't show up in the comments, you all let me know. And I'll deal with that afterwards. And I will put it there. Okay, what about are there any of the um, the 50 things in the book? Are there any that people have disagreed agreed with you? Or said like, No, that's a bad idea.

Amanda Rodriguez:

No, no one ever disagrees with me. What? No, Aren't you lucky? Yeah, agree either.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

See, I have an arguer I have debater. He loves, you know, the whole like devil's advocate. aspect. Yes.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yeah.My husband is pretty chill, but no, I would say I don't think anybody has specifically disagree. The book was very well received. So I get a lot of feedback. Like, oh, that's, you know, I wouldn't like unexpected things because people pick up the book and just assume that it's gonna be like 50 tips or 50 things that, you know, you have to do with a baby like, take, learn how to diaper. I don't know, I can't even think like those type of things. But so I haven't gotten I don't know, I don't read the comments. So maybe people probably a good thing, right people. Ton of negative feedback, and I have put it out of my mind. And it's amazing. Everyone's

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

positive that totally, I just thought, everyone if if I was going to add to the book, I just thought of one and it's kind of weird, but I will put it out there because I wish I had done this. I missed the way my babies smell so much, right? Like, every time I pick the baby up no matter where when, whatever I always would, like pick my child up. Sniff their head. Yeah, every single time. She's like, it was just weird. No,

Amanda Rodriguez:

I used to do that too. Just the

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

baby had smell is amazing. And every baby has their own smell, of course. So if there was a way to save the baby smell like I don't know, you know, a piece of their clothing in a ziploc that might continue smelling like them for a while. I would do that.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yeah, I would pick my babies up and smell their neck, which always wasn't always a great thing to smell. Yeah, even when I got that it was still better than what I get now at 15, 18 and 21. If I was to smell any part of their body, even as it passes me,

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

I'm learning that mine's only 12 I don't want to embarrass him or anything but wholy moly and then they resist showering.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yes. Be like, Yeah, I'm gonna shower tonight,

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

dude. Well, yeah, Got to dude, I'm like, my

Amanda Rodriguez:

My ears are burning. When you walk by you must take a shower. This is not optional.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

When ears that are of a different sense entirely are burning as opposed to the nose, you know?

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yes. Yeah. So like it's so pungent that it's coming.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

That's pretty much pungent. Mommy and caller TV says she was not a fan of the baby smell. Wow. Like there must be a study on this. We need to like MRI your brain or something? I feel like it's an evolutionary thing. That we want to smell babies and you don't so let's see why I would like to know. Lets do this study. Um, I want to tell everybody all the places they can find you on the internet.

Unknown:

All over the internet, the dude, I'm the dude bomb, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, tik tok. But don't be so my tik tok account now is pretty quiet. Because when 2020 was happening, and everybody's at home, you know, I did a bunch of dancing videos with my kids. They have since entirely moved away from that experience and not have anything to do with me. But even I was having a blast with that. But somehow I put two videos of my dogs that went viral on Tiktok. And I was like, well, that's great because I don't I'm not a dog account. So I have basically like three videos. There's two that are like crazy. And then you know I tried to make some other ones with my dogs well, they don't cooperate. They're literally like just like my kids. They are don't want anything to do with me or my camera in their face. They don't do any funny things that other dogs do. It was just these two particular videos and all these people followed me and I was like, well you're gonna be sad because I'm not a dog got a dog person tik talker so I

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

don't know to me that way it was thinks your something and then we're that my my most viral video on tik tok I was one where I was sort of making fun of certain dads that I know. And the way that they like, don't step up. Okay, and so that that went viral. And so all of a sudden, like my tik tok, every everyone that follows me is looking for things about how terrible men are and how terrible dads are. And that's really not like I'm mar. I'm married, happily married, for the most part. He's great. Like looking for a single mom who's all like empowered? And I'm like, Well, I can just say from what I've observed you know, I support the single moms anyway up so they

Amanda Rodriguez:

might know why. You can hear me right.

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

And yeah, mommy and cola was a huge fan of yours. Amanda, you have a fan

Amanda Rodriguez:

awesome. I'm telling my kids because they think I'm a dork. So tell

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

Tell them because no matter what you do, your kids will always think you're a dork. That's what parenting is. Thank you so much for hanging out with me. You guys go check out the dude mom on all the places and check out the book which I will put in the comments of the 50 things that you should do the first year you have a kid and be a good gift for people. So

Amanda Rodriguez:

just just just the lead I second that 100%

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo:

There you go. Okay, so thank you so much. And I hope we can do this again.

Amanda Rodriguez:

Yeah, sounds good. Thank you. Yeah.