Leading Each Person, Not Just the Team

Leading a team and leading each person on it are two different things. The second is where the real impact lives.

In this episode of The Career Edge, Leslie Ferry explores what happens when the interconnected skills from the last two episodes are applied to each individual on a team over time.

The result is not just better relationships, but trust. And trust, it turns out, is what earns the right to do the most important parts of a leader's job.

Through two scenes, a motivational speech that reached the whole team and feedback that finally landed, you’ll hear what becomes possible when a people leader leads each person rather than just the team.

Ability. Integrity. Benevolence. These three things are what trust is made of. And once trust is present, something becomes possible that was not.

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Transcript

Welcome to the Career Edge, where we unpack how work actually works. I'm Leslie Ferry. In the last two episodes, we talked about putting human knowledge to work and the interconnected skills that make that possible: active listening, critical thinking, intellectual humility, strategic communication, each one strengthening the others. Today we're going to look at what those interconnected skills produce when a people leader.

applies them to each individual person on their team over time. Not just better relationships, but something more specific and more powerful than that that they build. Trust. And what trust earns the right to do. Think about a scene we explored a couple episodes ago. A people leader had gathered their whole team together and had delivered the same motivational message to everyone. They were really energetic and genuine.

And focused on the big goal and what achieving it would mean for the team. In the room, half the team lit up. Questions flew and energy was visible. The other half nodded politely, attentive, but not activated. The meeting ended well enough and everyone left. And then the weeks that followed told the real story. The half that lit up moved with urgency. The other half moved at their regular pace.

The goal the leader had painted so vividly had not yet connected to something personal enough to change how they showed up every day. So the leader paused on that question. The message was right. The delivery was genuine. So why did it only reach half the room?

That question is where something shifted. Instead of delivering the same message again or louder or more empathetically, the leaders started following up differently. One on one conversations after the team meeting. Not to repeat the speech, to understand what each person heard, what connected for them, and what did not, what they were thinking about when they nodded. And from those conversations, a a picture started to form, not of a team.

Of each individual, each one driven by something different. One person needed to understand how the specific contribution connected to the outcome. Another needed more data that led to the decision about what they were trying to achieve. And a third was motivated by the challenge itself, the chance to prove something to themselves. The leader started asking themself after every significant interaction, the same questions, what did I hear from the individual?

What did it reveal about them? What does this person need that I have not yet been giving them? And what small adjustment would change our next conversation? That's the performance loop applied to each person intentionally over time.

And something started to build. Not rapport exactly, something more durable than that. Each team member started to feel something that they may not have been able to name, but could absolutely feel. That their leaders saw them, not as a role, as a person. That's the depth of trust.

The next time a big push came, the leader's approach was a little bit different. The team meeting still happened, but it was followed by individual conversations specific to each person. For the one who always asked ⁓ how a change would affect the team and the people doing the work, the leader shared their own thinking about those impacts, but then went on to ask what the individual thought and what the leader might be missing. That invitation did something the team meeting could never do.

It made that person feel like their perspective was not an obstacle to progress, but essential to it. For the one who needed evidence before they could commit, the leader walked through the data behind the decision, not defensively, but transparently. Here's what we know. Here's what we're still testing. Here's why we are confident enough to move. That conversation gave the individual what they needed to move with the team rather than following behind.

Research tells us that an idea or a message sometimes needs to be heard up to seven times before it truly lands. It needs to land differently for different people. The leader who understands that stops expecting one conversation to change everything and starts building the rhythm of smaller, more personal touches that compound over time. The same goal communicated the way each person needs to receive it.

So that a whole team can move. What the leader had been doing over those weeks was applying these interconnected skills that we've been talking about. Listening to understand what each person needed rather than what the leader assumed they needed. Using that understanding to think more clearly about each individual, what drives them, what they fear, what they need to feel trusted and motivated, staying humble enough to let what they heard and

What was being revealed genuinely changed how they showed up with each individual and communicating back to them in a way that reached each person rather than addressing the group. Those interconnected skills built something specific. Trust.

And trust is built on three things working together ability, integrity, and benevolence.

When a people leader communicates clearly, and in a way each person can understand or get clarity, they demonstrate competence. When their thinking is sharpened by genuine listening and intellectual humility, their judgment earns respect. That is ability. The team members start to believe and know their leader knows what they're doing. And then there's integrity. The most visible and most concrete of the three, probably.

It shows up not in grand gestures, but in the smallest commitments. I'll get you that information by Thursday. I'll follow up on what you raised in our last conversation. I will look into that and come back to you. Every one of those promises is either kept or it is not. And team members notice, not always consciously, but over time the pattern accumulates into a feeling. This person does what they say they will do.

Or they do not. The leader who wants to build trust keeps track. Not because they're performatively organized, but because they understand that integrity is built in the small moments that are the easiest to forget. A simple note after every one-on-one, what did I commit to? And then following through before it needs to be asked about again. When a people leader genuinely listens and adjusts based on what each person needs, they demonstrate care.

Not performative care, care rooted in real understanding of who each person is. That's benevolence. The team member starts to believe their leader is on their side. Ability, integrity, benevolence. These three together are what trust is made of. And once trust is present, something becomes possible that wasn't before. Because trust is needed.

To earn the right to provide feedback. Let's take a look at an example. A leader had a team member whose work was consistently good, but whose communication and cross-functional meetings was creating friction. Other team members were starting to notice, so it needed to be addressed. The leader sat down with the individual and shared with them the feedback clearly and directly. The team member listened and said thank you, and then continued.

To do exactly what they had always been doing. Nothing changed. Not because the feedback was wrong, not because the team member didn't hear it, but because the relationship had not yet had enough trust to carry it. The team member heard the words, but they didn't feel seen enough by the person delivering them to let the words matter. So the feedback stayed on the surface.

It didn't reach the place where behavior actually changes. So the leader reflected on why their feedback hadn't created the expected change. They asked, How well do I actually know this person? What motivates them? What do they need to feel valued? The honest answer was that the relationship was thinner than it should have been to have feedback this important get accepted. So the answer wasn't better delivery.

It was more trust. So the leader kept building, more genuine listening, more one-on-one conversations that demonstrated real understanding for what this person cared about and what they were working toward. More moments where the team member felt that their leader was genuinely invested in their growth, not just their performance. And then that same feedback delivered again in a different moment and a different relationship.

And the way the individual could clearly see the intent behind it, helpful growth was received completely differently. The team member they didn't just hear it, they received it. And they acted on it. Because by then, they trusted the person delivering it genuinely saw them and genuinely wanted them to succeed. The feedback topic didn't change. How it was delivered.

And trust it traveled through did.

Trust is not built in a single conversation. It builds in the accumulation of small moments where each person on a team feels genuinely understood by the person leading them. Active listening, critical thinking, intellectual humility, strategic communication, the same interconnected skills apply to each person over time. That's what earns the right to lead each individual in the way that it enables them to perform at their best.

And that's how work actually works.

The thinking in these episodes is designed to provoke a question. Zandra is built to help you answer it personally in the context of your own work at Zandra.app forward slash wiring gap Thanks for listening to the Career Edge. I'll see you next time.