{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":0.0,"endTime":3.54,"body":"Beauty is actually"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":0.0,"endTime":3.54,"body":"an invitation to walk in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3.54,"endTime":7.8,"body":"goodness, to walk in truth, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3.54,"endTime":7.8,"body":"know, and to see beauty in that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":7.8,"endTime":12.78,"body":"way. I definitely see God in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":7.8,"endTime":12.78,"body":"that you not just as the creator"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":12.84,"endTime":20.3,"body":"you know, which is wonderful,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":12.84,"endTime":20.3,"body":"but as a beckoner you Joshua,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":29.36,"endTime":31.04,"body":"hello and"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":29.36,"endTime":31.04,"body":"welcome to the shifting culture"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":31.04,"endTime":33.38,"body":"podcast in which we have"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":31.04,"endTime":33.38,"body":"conversations about the culture"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":33.38,"endTime":36.26,"body":"we create and the impact we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":33.38,"endTime":36.26,"body":"could make. We long to see the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":36.26,"endTime":39.98,"body":"body of Christ look like Jesus."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":36.26,"endTime":39.98,"body":"I'm your host, Joshua Johnson,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":40.34,"endTime":44.98,"body":"today I'm talking with Amy bird,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":40.34,"endTime":44.98,"body":"an author who often pushes us to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":44.98,"endTime":48.7,"body":"question norms we usually take"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":44.98,"endTime":48.7,"body":"for granted. If you've ever felt"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":48.7,"endTime":52.48,"body":"the pressure to put on a mask or"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":48.7,"endTime":52.48,"body":"hide parts of who you really"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":52.48,"endTime":55.9,"body":"are, you'll find this"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":52.48,"endTime":55.9,"body":"conversation meaningful. In her"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":55.9,"endTime":59.14,"body":"latest book saving face, Amy"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":55.9,"endTime":59.14,"body":"dives into the masks we all"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":59.14,"endTime":62.4,"body":"wear, the ways we conceal"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":59.14,"endTime":62.4,"body":"ourselves and what it takes to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":62.4,"endTime":66.6,"body":"discover our authentic selves"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":62.4,"endTime":66.6,"body":"underneath it all, we'll unpack"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":66.6,"endTime":70.14,"body":"some thoughtful questions. What"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":66.6,"endTime":70.14,"body":"stories do our faces reveal?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":70.32,"endTime":73.68,"body":"What changes when we drop the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":70.32,"endTime":73.68,"body":"act and allow ourselves to be"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":73.68,"endTime":77.46,"body":"seen? Amy shares honestly from"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":73.68,"endTime":77.46,"body":"her experiences with spiritual"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":77.46,"endTime":81.2,"body":"abuse through theological"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":77.46,"endTime":81.2,"body":"reflection and her personal"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":81.2,"endTime":84.86,"body":"journey toward healing and"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":81.2,"endTime":84.86,"body":"authenticity. We also discuss"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":84.86,"endTime":88.28,"body":"journaling, encountering Jesus"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":84.86,"endTime":88.28,"body":"in surprising moments, and why"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":88.28,"endTime":91.4,"body":"truly seeing each other might"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":88.28,"endTime":91.4,"body":"hold answers for a deeply"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":91.4,"endTime":94.82,"body":"divided society. If you're"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":91.4,"endTime":94.82,"body":"navigating issues of faith,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":94.82,"endTime":98.42,"body":"identity or just interested in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":94.82,"endTime":98.42,"body":"genuine connection, I think"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":98.42,"endTime":101.92,"body":"you'll find this episode"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":98.42,"endTime":101.92,"body":"insightful and practical. So"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":101.92,"endTime":105.64,"body":"let's get into it. This is about"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":101.92,"endTime":105.64,"body":"what it means to save face by"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":105.64,"endTime":111.64,"body":"choosing to show our real faces."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":105.64,"endTime":111.64,"body":"Here is my conversation with Amy"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":111.76,"endTime":115.36,"body":"bird. Amy, welcome back to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":111.76,"endTime":115.36,"body":"shifting culture. So glad to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":115.36,"endTime":117.04,"body":"have you back on. Thanks for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":115.36,"endTime":117.04,"body":"joining me."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":117.34,"endTime":119.26,"body":"Yeah, it's great to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":117.34,"endTime":119.26,"body":"talk again. Joshua, thanks for"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":119.26,"endTime":122.16,"body":"having me. Yeah, let's talk"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":119.26,"endTime":122.16,"body":"about faces"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":122.28,"endTime":126.06,"body":"today. We're"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":122.28,"endTime":126.06,"body":"we're gonna dive into your book"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":126.12,"endTime":132.6,"body":"saving face. So why faces? What?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":126.12,"endTime":132.6,"body":"What drew you to the face? What"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":132.6,"endTime":136.26,"body":"drew you to this? This topic,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":132.6,"endTime":136.26,"body":"why do you think that our faces"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":136.26,"endTime":138.06,"body":"are so important? Ah,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":138.06,"endTime":140.36,"body":"that's a good"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":138.06,"endTime":140.36,"body":"question. I believe that it's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":140.36,"endTime":144.32,"body":"theme that's kind of been"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":140.36,"endTime":144.32,"body":"working its way in my life and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":144.32,"endTime":148.52,"body":"in my thought life. It's a very"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":144.32,"endTime":148.52,"body":"existential kind of theme. But"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":148.52,"endTime":153.74,"body":"Your faces are so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":148.52,"endTime":153.74,"body":"confrontational, and I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":153.74,"endTime":158.12,"body":"there are such a good metaphor"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":153.74,"endTime":158.12,"body":"too, for you build, like, the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":158.12,"endTime":160.96,"body":"first half of your life. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":158.12,"endTime":160.96,"body":"really build this kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":160.96,"endTime":165.7,"body":"persona, right, this ego of the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":160.96,"endTime":165.7,"body":"person that you want to be, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":165.7,"endTime":168.46,"body":"you want other people to see you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":165.7,"endTime":168.46,"body":"at and you know what you define"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":168.46,"endTime":172.72,"body":"as goodness, even, and what you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":168.46,"endTime":172.72,"body":"believe Scripture teaches about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":172.72,"endTime":177.76,"body":"that. So we try to be that. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":172.72,"endTime":177.76,"body":"then often it's later in life"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":178.18,"endTime":183.6,"body":"when we realize that, oh, like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":178.18,"endTime":183.6,"body":"I've been putting all this on."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":183.6,"endTime":187.68,"body":"I've been in this hustle. I've"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":183.6,"endTime":187.68,"body":"been striving so much, but maybe"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":187.68,"endTime":192.6,"body":"a lot of what I've constructed"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":187.68,"endTime":192.6,"body":"isn't real and isn't really me."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":193.08,"endTime":198.3,"body":"There is a philosopher, Emmanuel"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":193.08,"endTime":198.3,"body":"Levinas, who has written about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":198.3,"endTime":202.1,"body":"the face and the naked face and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":198.3,"endTime":202.1,"body":"the blessings that we give in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":202.1,"endTime":207.74,"body":"our face. And I was fascinated"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":202.1,"endTime":207.74,"body":"by his writing, but it's very"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":207.74,"endTime":212.6,"body":"academic, and so I wanted to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":207.74,"endTime":212.6,"body":"bring that down into a more"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":212.6,"endTime":217.34,"body":"contemplative writing style. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":212.6,"endTime":217.34,"body":"so this book of mine is is a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":217.34,"endTime":220.9,"body":"different writing style, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":217.34,"endTime":220.9,"body":"it's really about encounter,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":221.32,"endTime":225.82,"body":"encounter with yourself,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":221.32,"endTime":225.82,"body":"encounter with other people and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":225.82,"endTime":227.08,"body":"encounter with God."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":227.32,"endTime":230.2,"body":"Well, then take"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":227.32,"endTime":230.2,"body":"us into an encounter. What are"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":230.2,"endTime":235.42,"body":"some of our first encounters, of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":230.2,"endTime":235.42,"body":"faces? How does that help us as"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":235.42,"endTime":238.0,"body":"we first enter this world?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":235.42,"endTime":238.0,"body":"Right?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":238.0,"endTime":242.16,"body":"I mean, we come into"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":238.0,"endTime":242.16,"body":"this world looking for a face."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":242.52,"endTime":249.24,"body":"We come looking for a face that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":242.52,"endTime":249.24,"body":"is delighting in our face, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":249.24,"endTime":252.42,"body":"that really tells us something."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":249.24,"endTime":252.42,"body":"When we see that delight, when"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":252.42,"endTime":256.14,"body":"we make that connection, it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":252.42,"endTime":256.14,"body":"tells us that we matter. It"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":256.14,"endTime":261.98,"body":"tells us that we're loved. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":256.14,"endTime":261.98,"body":"so we learn about who we are by"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":262.28,"endTime":267.98,"body":"the faces that we encounter. We"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":262.28,"endTime":267.98,"body":"can't see our own face, so we're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":267.98,"endTime":271.04,"body":"learning about who we are"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":267.98,"endTime":271.04,"body":"through the faces of others. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":271.04,"endTime":274.1,"body":"you know, it's interesting,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":271.04,"endTime":274.1,"body":"because before we develop"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":274.1,"endTime":277.64,"body":"language and everything, we're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":274.1,"endTime":277.64,"body":"really good at using that right"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":277.64,"endTime":282.1,"body":"brain that can read a face and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":277.64,"endTime":282.1,"body":"really know what's going on in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":282.1,"endTime":286.06,"body":"that face and and what they're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":282.1,"endTime":286.06,"body":"communicating to us. And you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":286.06,"endTime":290.26,"body":"know, ultimately, we're looking"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":286.06,"endTime":290.26,"body":"for God's face. Our great"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":290.26,"endTime":295.42,"body":"longing is for us to be face to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":290.26,"endTime":295.42,"body":"face, you know, the vision of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":295.42,"endTime":300.72,"body":"God and for him to delight in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":295.42,"endTime":300.72,"body":"us. And so. Believe that our"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":300.72,"endTime":305.46,"body":"faces are, in a sense, like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":300.72,"endTime":305.46,"body":"mirrors showing ourselves to one"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":305.46,"endTime":308.7,"body":"another, but also like God is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":305.46,"endTime":308.7,"body":"hiding in the face of a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":308.7,"endTime":312.24,"body":"neighbor. And so Emmanuel"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":308.7,"endTime":312.24,"body":"Levinas does say, he says, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":312.24,"endTime":316.8,"body":"know, theology begins in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":312.24,"endTime":316.8,"body":"face of a neighbor. And it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":316.8,"endTime":322.1,"body":"really brings home what Christ"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":316.8,"endTime":322.1,"body":"said about I never knew you kind"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":322.1,"endTime":325.94,"body":"of thing. I was thirsty and you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":322.1,"endTime":325.94,"body":"didn't give me water. I was in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":325.94,"endTime":329.66,"body":"prison and you didn't visit me."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":325.94,"endTime":329.66,"body":"You know, I was naked and you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":329.66,"endTime":333.92,"body":"didn't clothe me. And so I just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":329.66,"endTime":333.92,"body":"think of, I'm trying to live my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":333.92,"endTime":338.06,"body":"life now, more picturing like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":333.92,"endTime":338.06,"body":"Christ in that person I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":338.06,"endTime":339.86,"body":"talking to and encountering"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":340.22,"endTime":342.52,"body":"that makes all"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":340.22,"endTime":342.52,"body":"the difference. If you see"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":342.52,"endTime":347.98,"body":"Christ in that person, even if"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":342.52,"endTime":347.98,"body":"they're not emulating Christ, if"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":347.98,"endTime":350.98,"body":"you could see Christ in that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":347.98,"endTime":350.98,"body":"person, we are all made in the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":350.98,"endTime":356.56,"body":"image of God. Since we come into"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":350.98,"endTime":356.56,"body":"the world seeking a face and we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":356.62,"endTime":361.56,"body":"we know who we are for like the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":356.62,"endTime":361.56,"body":"delight in others faces, it"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":361.56,"endTime":366.96,"body":"seems to me that we forget that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":361.56,"endTime":366.96,"body":"right away when we're growing"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":366.96,"endTime":371.04,"body":"up, and then we're we're"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":366.96,"endTime":371.04,"body":"constantly striving to get back"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":371.04,"endTime":375.48,"body":"to the place of seeing the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":371.04,"endTime":375.48,"body":"delight of other people's faces"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":375.54,"endTime":379.38,"body":"when they see me, so we could be"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":375.54,"endTime":379.38,"body":"truly known. We have our"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":379.38,"endTime":383.18,"body":"identity and we have belonging."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":379.38,"endTime":383.18,"body":"Where does this brokenness come"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":383.18,"endTime":387.32,"body":"into? Where does this face?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":383.18,"endTime":387.32,"body":"Where we we forget about the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":387.32,"endTime":391.1,"body":"delight in others, and we forget"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":387.32,"endTime":391.1,"body":"that God is delighting in us."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":391.28,"endTime":393.32,"body":"How do we be? How did we become"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":391.28,"endTime":393.32,"body":"broken?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":395.66,"endTime":398.36,"body":"A lot of answers to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":395.66,"endTime":398.36,"body":"that question, right? You know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":398.36,"endTime":402.64,"body":"there's the obvious Christian"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":398.36,"endTime":402.64,"body":"theological answer about Sen,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":402.7,"endTime":406.54,"body":"which is very true and real, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":402.7,"endTime":406.54,"body":"I try to frame it in the book"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":406.54,"endTime":411.34,"body":"too, just about like the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":406.54,"endTime":411.34,"body":"fractures in our faces and and I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":411.34,"endTime":414.58,"body":"feel like you, so I have a whole"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":411.34,"endTime":414.58,"body":"part in the book on that, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":414.58,"endTime":419.68,"body":"what I try to do is, like, with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":414.58,"endTime":419.68,"body":"each chapter, they're shorter"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":419.68,"endTime":424.32,"body":"chapters, I Have a little kind"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":419.68,"endTime":424.32,"body":"of storied memory of my own, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":424.38,"endTime":426.84,"body":"it's like going back and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":424.38,"endTime":426.84,"body":"visiting my face at different"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":426.84,"endTime":430.62,"body":"stages of my life. And so I do I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":426.84,"endTime":430.62,"body":"capture some of those, those"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":430.62,"endTime":434.7,"body":"fractures, and some of those"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":430.62,"endTime":434.7,"body":"were when I was harmed and and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":434.7,"endTime":437.58,"body":"other times it's when I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":434.7,"endTime":437.58,"body":"harming other people too, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":437.58,"endTime":441.56,"body":"know, in these memories, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":437.58,"endTime":441.56,"body":"what can we learn in them. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":441.56,"endTime":446.24,"body":"so I think to go back and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":441.56,"endTime":446.24,"body":"revisit memories that have stuck"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":446.24,"endTime":450.38,"body":"with us for some reason, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":446.24,"endTime":450.38,"body":"why? Why is that? What I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":450.38,"endTime":454.46,"body":"remember about when I was eight,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":450.38,"endTime":454.46,"body":"what was it that was significant"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":454.46,"endTime":459.68,"body":"there, that it's made it like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":454.46,"endTime":459.68,"body":"implicit in my mind still? So I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":459.68,"endTime":463.6,"body":"think there's a lot of fractures"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":459.68,"endTime":463.6,"body":"going on in our psyche and our"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":463.6,"endTime":469.0,"body":"souls. However, we try so hard"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":463.6,"endTime":469.0,"body":"to hide them and stuff them"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":469.0,"endTime":472.6,"body":"down. They might be parts about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":469.0,"endTime":472.6,"body":"us that we don't like, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":472.6,"endTime":475.48,"body":"sinful parts that we're like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":472.6,"endTime":475.48,"body":"Okay, this isn't good. I can't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":475.48,"endTime":478.36,"body":"be this person. I want to be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":475.48,"endTime":478.36,"body":"this person. But instead of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":478.42,"endTime":482.28,"body":"actually being curious about why"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":478.42,"endTime":482.28,"body":"it's there, you know, and what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":482.4,"endTime":486.54,"body":"we can explore and do about it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":482.4,"endTime":486.54,"body":"and honest with ourselves and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":486.54,"endTime":491.22,"body":"other people, we stuff it down"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":486.54,"endTime":491.22,"body":"and pretend like we're past it,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":491.28,"endTime":495.24,"body":"we're over it, and those things"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":491.28,"endTime":495.24,"body":"kind of pop back up later in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":495.24,"endTime":498.72,"body":"life, you know. Or we jack it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":495.24,"endTime":498.72,"body":"onto other people, you know."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":498.72,"endTime":501.86,"body":"What I'm trying to do in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":498.72,"endTime":501.86,"body":"book here is be able to, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":501.86,"endTime":504.92,"body":"know, what I kind of describe as"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":501.86,"endTime":504.92,"body":"dig up our secrets to these"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":504.92,"endTime":508.28,"body":"encounters with Jesus in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":504.92,"endTime":508.28,"body":"Scripture. Isn't he doing that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":508.34,"endTime":513.2,"body":"over and over again? He is this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":508.34,"endTime":513.2,"body":"kind of mirror, you know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":513.26,"endTime":518.9,"body":"and he helps people dig up their"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":513.26,"endTime":518.9,"body":"secrets about themselves. That's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":518.9,"endTime":521.92,"body":"been there all along, but we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":518.9,"endTime":521.92,"body":"just won't look at it. You know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":522.1,"endTime":523.48,"body":"that's the naked face"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":523.9,"endTime":526.36,"body":"I'm I'm working"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":523.9,"endTime":526.36,"body":"on a one man show at the moment,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":526.42,"endTime":531.04,"body":"and it's all about the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":526.42,"endTime":531.04,"body":"encounters with Jesus, and how"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":531.1,"endTime":535.54,"body":"when we encounter Jesus, he"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":531.1,"endTime":535.54,"body":"encounters us, it can shift"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":535.54,"endTime":539.08,"body":"everything in culture that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":535.54,"endTime":539.08,"body":"there's cycles of revenge will"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":539.08,"endTime":542.94,"body":"actually be stopped, because"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":539.08,"endTime":542.94,"body":"there's love and forgiveness,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":542.94,"endTime":546.96,"body":"and it's the encounter of Jesus,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":542.94,"endTime":546.96,"body":"and it's really important. But"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":547.02,"endTime":550.5,"body":"you said something before that's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":547.02,"endTime":550.5,"body":"really, really key, is that when"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":550.5,"endTime":555.24,"body":"we actually get hurt, or we hurt"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":550.5,"endTime":555.24,"body":"others and we stuff it down,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":555.54,"endTime":559.86,"body":"then we have a a face that we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":555.54,"endTime":559.86,"body":"put on. We have a put on face,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":559.86,"endTime":564.86,"body":"right? We we don't project who"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":559.86,"endTime":564.86,"body":"we truly are to the world. What"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":564.86,"endTime":570.14,"body":"happened to you when you started"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":564.86,"endTime":570.14,"body":"to stuff down the fractures in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":570.14,"endTime":570.74,"body":"your life?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":632.8000000000001,"endTime":635.2,"body":"I think I became"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":632.8000000000001,"endTime":635.2,"body":"pretty self righteous, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":635.2,"endTime":639.4,"body":"like I started to leave my own"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":635.2,"endTime":639.4,"body":"story about myself. And it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":639.64,"endTime":642.96,"body":"interesting, because, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":639.64,"endTime":642.96,"body":"it really took, you know, I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":642.96,"endTime":647.04,"body":"ashamed to say it took for me to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":642.96,"endTime":647.04,"body":"go through terrible spiritual"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":647.04,"endTime":649.74,"body":"abuse in the church. And you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":647.04,"endTime":649.74,"body":"know, I've written about that,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":649.74,"endTime":654.0,"body":"I've spoken about that, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":649.74,"endTime":654.0,"body":"I've, you know, come to see"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":654.0,"endTime":657.72,"body":"like, as evil as it was, and as"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":654.0,"endTime":657.72,"body":"cruel as it was, and how it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":657.9,"endTime":660.66,"body":"completely led to like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":657.9,"endTime":660.66,"body":"disillusionment and rocking my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":660.66,"endTime":663.62,"body":"world. Held in a lot of ways,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":660.66,"endTime":663.62,"body":"there was a point where I had to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":663.62,"endTime":668.0,"body":"really do some work on myself,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":663.62,"endTime":668.0,"body":"like, what attracted me to a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":668.0,"endTime":671.0,"body":"church like this in the first"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":668.0,"endTime":671.0,"body":"place? You know, what? Why"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":671.0,"endTime":675.02,"body":"wasn't I looking at some things"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":671.0,"endTime":675.02,"body":"that were obviously there and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":675.02,"endTime":679.34,"body":"wrong, you know, until this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":675.02,"endTime":679.34,"body":"happened to me? Why did I hold"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":679.34,"endTime":682.4200000000001,"body":"on for so long thinking there"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":679.34,"endTime":682.4200000000001,"body":"would be reform and change and,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":682.78,"endTime":689.08,"body":"you know, all these things. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":682.78,"endTime":689.08,"body":"so it was this evaluation of my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":689.08,"endTime":693.7,"body":"own self then, like, I need"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":689.08,"endTime":693.7,"body":"better self awareness. And so I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":693.7,"endTime":698.5600000000001,"body":"realized that I did have, I was"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":693.7,"endTime":698.5600000000001,"body":"attracted to this denomination,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":698.62,"endTime":702.48,"body":"particularly because it made me"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":698.62,"endTime":702.48,"body":"feel very secure. It made me"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":702.48,"endTime":705.0600000000001,"body":"feel like there was this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":702.48,"endTime":705.0600000000001,"body":"certainty, you know, there was"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":705.0600000000001,"endTime":708.0,"body":"kind of an elitism in that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":705.0600000000001,"endTime":708.0,"body":"theology, that system that they"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":708.0,"endTime":713.4,"body":"had. And it made me feel safe"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":708.0,"endTime":713.4,"body":"and secure and right, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":713.4,"endTime":719.64,"body":"and good. And then when I saw it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":713.4,"endTime":719.64,"body":"all blow up and and was led to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":719.64,"endTime":722.66,"body":"such disillusionment, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":719.64,"endTime":722.66,"body":"I was seeing some of that in my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":722.66,"endTime":727.16,"body":"own self, on my own character as"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":722.66,"endTime":727.16,"body":"well. No, and one memory I've"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":727.22,"endTime":731.24,"body":"revisited in the book is of one"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":727.22,"endTime":731.24,"body":"of my oldest, dearest childhood"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":731.24,"endTime":735.6800000000001,"body":"friends, whom I harmed a couple"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":731.24,"endTime":735.6800000000001,"body":"times, but one time, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":735.6800000000001,"endTime":738.8000000000001,"body":"in my 30s, when she was going"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":735.6800000000001,"endTime":738.8000000000001,"body":"our 30s, when she was going"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":738.8000000000001,"endTime":744.04,"body":"through a divorce, and I looked"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":738.8000000000001,"endTime":744.04,"body":"back and saw just how clueless I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":744.04,"endTime":748.84,"body":"was to her pain, how self"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":744.04,"endTime":748.84,"body":"righteous I was. You know about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":748.84,"endTime":752.5,"body":"this divorce? We both came from"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":748.84,"endTime":752.5,"body":"divorce homes, so, you know, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":752.6800000000001,"endTime":755.32,"body":"believe that she would do that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":752.6800000000001,"endTime":755.32,"body":"like, like I was putting it on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":755.32,"endTime":760.54,"body":"her, though, and it really"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":755.32,"endTime":760.54,"body":"fractured our friendship. And I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":760.54,"endTime":763.26,"body":"will say, like being able to go"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":760.54,"endTime":763.26,"body":"through that memory, work and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":763.26,"endTime":766.62,"body":"share it with her, like we've,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":763.26,"endTime":766.62,"body":"we've been able to grow some"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":766.62,"endTime":770.64,"body":"more together. But it's, it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":766.62,"endTime":770.64,"body":"because I was able to look at my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":770.64,"endTime":774.72,"body":"own self and be like, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":770.64,"endTime":774.72,"body":"what's the matter here with me?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":774.72,"endTime":778.38,"body":"How did I do that to my friend,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":774.72,"endTime":778.38,"body":"you know? And truly torn up and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":778.38,"endTime":784.1,"body":"broken over it. So, yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":778.38,"endTime":784.1,"body":"mean, this is not easy work to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":784.1,"endTime":788.0600000000001,"body":"do, but it's very freeing,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":784.1,"endTime":788.0600000000001,"body":"because then you realize, like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":788.0600000000001,"endTime":793.16,"body":"all the work that you're doing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":788.0600000000001,"endTime":793.16,"body":"to keep that hustle going, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":793.16,"endTime":796.64,"body":"know, false person that you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":793.16,"endTime":796.64,"body":"thought you were. One"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":796.64,"endTime":798.02,"body":"thing that you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":796.64,"endTime":798.02,"body":"said in there, I think, is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":798.02,"endTime":801.76,"body":"really key. I could see if, if"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":798.02,"endTime":801.76,"body":"you get disillusioned, you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":801.76,"endTime":804.94,"body":"experience spiritual abuse, you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":801.76,"endTime":804.94,"body":"see the system that is not"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":804.94,"endTime":809.5,"body":"right, and then you just go"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":804.94,"endTime":809.5,"body":"against the system, get out of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":809.5,"endTime":812.98,"body":"it, and you don't do your own"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":809.5,"endTime":812.98,"body":"work and have any self awareness"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":812.98,"endTime":816.58,"body":"of who you are. In the midst of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":812.98,"endTime":816.58,"body":"it, you can start to perpetrate"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":816.58,"endTime":822.6,"body":"the same absolute things that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":816.58,"endTime":822.6,"body":"are happening within the church,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":822.78,"endTime":828.0600000000001,"body":"and so like doing that work is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":822.78,"endTime":828.0600000000001,"body":"really crucial and key if we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":828.0600000000001,"endTime":831.3000000000001,"body":"want to see any healing within"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":828.0600000000001,"endTime":831.3000000000001,"body":"the church and with each other"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":831.3000000000001,"endTime":835.38,"body":"as as a community. What led you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":831.3000000000001,"endTime":835.38,"body":"to some of this work? How did"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":835.38,"endTime":839.52,"body":"you start to say, I actually"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":835.38,"endTime":839.52,"body":"have to start to excavate what's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":839.52,"endTime":844.7,"body":"inside of me and not just put"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":839.52,"endTime":844.7,"body":"everything on other people,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":844.7,"endTime":849.02,"body":"which they perpetrated horrible"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":844.7,"endTime":849.02,"body":"things, but it's I have a part"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":849.02,"endTime":852.08,"body":"to play in this too, and I need"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":849.02,"endTime":852.08,"body":"to figure out who I am. Yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":852.08,"endTime":855.14,"body":"think multiple"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":852.08,"endTime":855.14,"body":"things led me to that. My time"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":855.14,"endTime":858.6800000000001,"body":"in the Word definitely, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":855.14,"endTime":858.6800000000001,"body":"know, I've spent significant"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":858.6800000000001,"endTime":862.54,"body":"time in the song songs, and I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":858.6800000000001,"endTime":862.54,"body":"feel like that, that intimate"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":862.6,"endTime":865.96,"body":"book in the Bible, you know that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":862.6,"endTime":865.96,"body":"is kind of this intimate"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":865.96,"endTime":869.26,"body":"encounter with God, you know"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":865.96,"endTime":869.26,"body":"that I think was able to help me"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":869.26,"endTime":874.9,"body":"to feel like loved enough by"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":869.26,"endTime":874.9,"body":"God, to be able to do that, how"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":874.9,"endTime":879.28,"body":"and develop my own longings and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":874.9,"endTime":879.28,"body":"desires. However, our family has"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":879.28,"endTime":882.12,"body":"really struggled in finding a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":879.28,"endTime":882.12,"body":"good church home ever since,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":882.12,"endTime":884.52,"body":"like, we're still working at it."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":882.12,"endTime":884.52,"body":"You know, a lot of it's our own,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":884.76,"endTime":888.66,"body":"not ready to be that vulnerable."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":884.76,"endTime":888.66,"body":"Other parts of it are like, What"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":888.66,"endTime":893.52,"body":"the heck's going all the church"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":888.66,"endTime":893.52,"body":"right now? And in some ways, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":893.52,"endTime":898.14,"body":"feel a little stranded and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":893.52,"endTime":898.14,"body":"alone. And yet, I think God has"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":898.14,"endTime":902.24,"body":"me in that liminal space. Maybe"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":898.14,"endTime":902.24,"body":"I wouldn't do that work, if I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":902.72,"endTime":906.5,"body":"was able to rush right back into"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":902.72,"endTime":906.5,"body":"another community. And so I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":906.5,"endTime":909.62,"body":"think that's another area. I've"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":906.5,"endTime":909.62,"body":"been doing a lot of journaling."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":909.6800000000001,"endTime":913.52,"body":"I think that's been, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":909.6800000000001,"endTime":913.52,"body":"you really can get to some self"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":913.52,"endTime":917.72,"body":"awareness when you when you do a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":913.52,"endTime":917.72,"body":"practice like that. And then,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":917.78,"endTime":922.48,"body":"you know, I've also had more"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":917.78,"endTime":922.48,"body":"interest in psychology, because"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":922.48,"endTime":928.6,"body":"I felt like one surprising thing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":922.48,"endTime":928.6,"body":"to me was how immature the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":928.6,"endTime":932.44,"body":"leaders in the church were when"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":928.6,"endTime":932.44,"body":"I went through this problem. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":932.6800000000001,"endTime":936.4,"body":"in a way, that's embarrassing to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":932.6800000000001,"endTime":936.4,"body":"even talk with unbelievers"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":936.4,"endTime":939.82,"body":"about, because it's such a poor"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":936.4,"endTime":939.82,"body":"witness of the church to see"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":939.82,"endTime":944.34,"body":"like the name, the level of meme"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":939.82,"endTime":944.34,"body":"calling and coming after, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":944.34,"endTime":948.1800000000001,"body":"know, my reputation online, and,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":944.34,"endTime":948.1800000000001,"body":"you know, taking my kids"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":948.1800000000001,"endTime":952.02,"body":"pictures and doing stuff with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":948.1800000000001,"endTime":952.02,"body":"them, and terrible, terrible"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":952.02,"endTime":957.0,"body":"things, and the way, none of it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":952.02,"endTime":957.0,"body":"could really be addressed in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":957.84,"endTime":962.12,"body":"like the process of church"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":957.84,"endTime":962.12,"body":"order. So. So odd, very"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":962.12,"endTime":967.58,"body":"disillusioning to see the level"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":962.12,"endTime":967.58,"body":"of immaturity and these leaders,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":967.58,"endTime":972.6800000000001,"body":"spiritually, emotionally, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":967.58,"endTime":972.6800000000001,"body":"know, in trying to address some"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":972.6800000000001,"endTime":978.8000000000001,"body":"of this and in a mature way and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":972.6800000000001,"endTime":978.8000000000001,"body":"not have that reciprocated. So"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":978.86,"endTime":982.48,"body":"that led me to really, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":978.86,"endTime":982.48,"body":"look more into things like, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":982.48,"endTime":987.1,"body":"know, like Carl young, he, he"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":982.48,"endTime":987.1,"body":"talks about the shadow, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":987.1,"endTime":989.6800000000001,"body":"know, a lot of that is like, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":987.1,"endTime":989.6800000000001,"body":"build this persona your whole"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":989.6800000000001,"endTime":991.84,"body":"life, and then you're stuffing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":989.6800000000001,"endTime":991.84,"body":"these other things down. That's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":991.84,"endTime":995.02,"body":"the shadow. But there comes a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":991.84,"endTime":995.02,"body":"time in life where we got to dig"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":995.02,"endTime":997.48,"body":"that back up and look at it, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":995.02,"endTime":997.48,"body":"unpack it, see what it's all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":997.48,"endTime":1001.26,"body":"about, and how does that get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":997.48,"endTime":1001.26,"body":"integrated into our whole self?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1001.38,"endTime":1006.5600000000001,"body":"I feel like the church has a lot"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1001.38,"endTime":1006.5600000000001,"body":"of shadow work to do now, for"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1006.5600000000001,"endTime":1011.48,"body":"sure, but even like in looking"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1006.5600000000001,"endTime":1011.48,"body":"at our history. So these are all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1011.48,"endTime":1015.08,"body":"things I think that got me on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1011.48,"endTime":1015.08,"body":"onto this topic and wanting to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1015.08,"endTime":1015.9200000000001,"body":"do that work."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1016.16,"endTime":1017.78,"body":"Thank you for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1016.16,"endTime":1017.78,"body":"doing that work and showing us"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1017.78,"endTime":1020.78,"body":"that we actually have to do some"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1017.78,"endTime":1020.78,"body":"of this shadow work. How do we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1020.78,"endTime":1024.76,"body":"start? How do we move towards a"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1020.78,"endTime":1024.76,"body":"place where we could start to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1024.76,"endTime":1029.08,"body":"find our identity, not in the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1024.76,"endTime":1029.08,"body":"scars that we have, the things"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1029.08,"endTime":1033.1599999999999,"body":"that we've actually been"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1029.08,"endTime":1033.1599999999999,"body":"fractured by, the striving that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1033.1599999999999,"endTime":1036.34,"body":"we do, the masks that we put on,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1033.1599999999999,"endTime":1036.34,"body":"but actually then take them off"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1036.58,"endTime":1039.6399999999999,"body":"with each other. What is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1036.58,"endTime":1039.6399999999999,"body":"something like incarnational"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1039.6399999999999,"endTime":1043.3799999999999,"body":"listening or like being involved"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1039.6399999999999,"endTime":1043.3799999999999,"body":"with somebody like that we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1043.3799999999999,"endTime":1047.3999999999999,"body":"open up in safe places. What"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1043.3799999999999,"endTime":1047.3999999999999,"body":"does it look like to open up"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1047.3999999999999,"endTime":1049.92,"body":"safe places so that we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1047.3999999999999,"endTime":1049.92,"body":"start to do some of this work"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1049.92,"endTime":1051.3,"body":"together. Close"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1051.3,"endTime":1054.48,"body":"relationships are so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1051.3,"endTime":1054.48,"body":"important, right? Relationships"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1054.48,"endTime":1060.18,"body":"where you really feel like you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1054.48,"endTime":1060.18,"body":"can be open and so what I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1060.18,"endTime":1063.74,"body":"trying to do in this book is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1060.18,"endTime":1063.74,"body":"help start a conversation, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1064.04,"endTime":1067.7,"body":"really help us develop within"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1064.04,"endTime":1067.7,"body":"ourselves to be that kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1067.7,"endTime":1072.26,"body":"person, to be the kind of person"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1067.7,"endTime":1072.26,"body":"who is a safe person to talk to,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1072.26,"endTime":1075.86,"body":"who isn't going to shame you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1072.26,"endTime":1075.86,"body":"right away, but is going to help"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1075.86,"endTime":1080.8999999999999,"body":"us to dig out our own secrets,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1075.86,"endTime":1080.8999999999999,"body":"and you know, not secrets like I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1080.96,"endTime":1084.76,"body":"did this terrible crying or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1080.96,"endTime":1084.76,"body":"whatever, but just things that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1084.76,"endTime":1089.74,"body":"we haven't faced about ourselves"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1084.76,"endTime":1089.74,"body":"and to encourage that encounter"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1089.8600000000001,"endTime":1095.56,"body":"with where God is meeting us in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1089.8600000000001,"endTime":1095.56,"body":"that so I think that friendship"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1095.6200000000001,"endTime":1098.2,"body":"is so important. And you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1095.6200000000001,"endTime":1098.2,"body":"that's something I have written"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1098.2,"endTime":1102.48,"body":"a lot about in my books and in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1098.2,"endTime":1102.48,"body":"my blogging and sub stacking,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1102.48,"endTime":1106.32,"body":"and it's something I was also"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1102.48,"endTime":1106.32,"body":"disillusioned with a little bit"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1106.32,"endTime":1109.8,"body":"after the church experience I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1106.32,"endTime":1109.8,"body":"had. Because, you know, we small"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1109.8,"endTime":1113.76,"body":"groups are great in church, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1109.8,"endTime":1113.76,"body":"sometimes they can be deceiving"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1113.76,"endTime":1117.72,"body":"as well. You know, like I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1113.76,"endTime":1117.72,"body":"thought I was in the small"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1117.72,"endTime":1120.1200000000001,"body":"group, that was one thing, and I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1117.72,"endTime":1120.1200000000001,"body":"found out it was another thing,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1120.1200000000001,"endTime":1125.48,"body":"huh? But I still have some"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1120.1200000000001,"endTime":1125.48,"body":"really close friendships from my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1125.48,"endTime":1128.24,"body":"small group at church as well."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1125.48,"endTime":1128.24,"body":"Some were very painful, and then"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1128.24,"endTime":1134.42,"body":"some have made it through, and I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1128.24,"endTime":1134.42,"body":"believe those were the ones that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1134.48,"endTime":1137.54,"body":"functioned with more maturity"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1134.48,"endTime":1137.54,"body":"and being able to be like these"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1137.54,"endTime":1140.48,"body":"are couples, married couples"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1137.54,"endTime":1140.48,"body":"that we can talk to about our"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1140.48,"endTime":1143.8,"body":"own struggles, you know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1140.48,"endTime":1143.8,"body":"know that they're not going to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1143.8,"endTime":1146.08,"body":"gossip about it somewhere."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1143.8,"endTime":1146.08,"body":"They're not going to be like, Oh"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1146.08,"endTime":1149.08,"body":"my gosh, can you believe, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1146.08,"endTime":1149.08,"body":"know, and that kind of thing,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1149.5,"endTime":1153.88,"body":"but that we're truly able to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1149.5,"endTime":1153.88,"body":"help one another imagine God's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1153.88,"endTime":1159.28,"body":"goodness and vision for us even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1153.88,"endTime":1159.28,"body":"when we can't feel it ourselves."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1160.3600000000001,"endTime":1163.74,"body":"You know, to be able to be that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1160.3600000000001,"endTime":1163.74,"body":"for other people is such a gift."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1164.22,"endTime":1167.46,"body":"And I mean, I'm thinking of my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1164.22,"endTime":1167.46,"body":"own self, and I'm thinking about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1167.46,"endTime":1172.5,"body":"my friends who you know, have"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1167.46,"endTime":1172.5,"body":"been in the pit, you know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1172.5,"endTime":1176.4,"body":"you know, whether it's a spouse"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1172.5,"endTime":1176.4,"body":"leaving them, you know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1176.82,"endTime":1180.54,"body":"completely heartbroken and not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1176.82,"endTime":1180.54,"body":"knowing, like how they ever are"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1180.54,"endTime":1183.56,"body":"going to have a future without"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1180.54,"endTime":1183.56,"body":"that person, and to be able to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1183.56,"endTime":1187.46,"body":"sit there with them in the pit"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1183.56,"endTime":1187.46,"body":"and remind them of their"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1187.46,"endTime":1191.3600000000001,"body":"goodness, but also to be like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1187.46,"endTime":1191.3600000000001,"body":"Yeah, this sucks, you know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1191.78,"endTime":1195.68,"body":"to grieve with them, but then"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1191.78,"endTime":1195.68,"body":"also be able to remind them,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1195.8,"endTime":1201.22,"body":"imagine for them the goodness"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1195.8,"endTime":1201.22,"body":"that is ahead, and then To be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1201.22,"endTime":1205.0,"body":"there when it happens, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1201.22,"endTime":1205.0,"body":"and when somebody's in the pit,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1205.1200000000001,"endTime":1208.54,"body":"like your brain can't hold all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1205.1200000000001,"endTime":1208.54,"body":"that stuff together, like Diane"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1208.54,"endTime":1211.3,"body":"langberg talks about this a lot."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1208.54,"endTime":1211.3,"body":"When somebody's experienced"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1211.3,"endTime":1215.32,"body":"trauma, they repeat things over"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1211.3,"endTime":1215.32,"body":"and over because it just doesn't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1215.32,"endTime":1219.52,"body":"make sense, and their brain"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1215.32,"endTime":1219.52,"body":"can't hold it. But not to get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1219.52,"endTime":1223.2,"body":"tired of it, just continue to be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1219.52,"endTime":1223.2,"body":"there for them through that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1223.2,"endTime":1226.2,"body":"they'll get through it to be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1223.2,"endTime":1226.2,"body":"that person who who stays in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1226.2,"endTime":1226.56,"body":"room."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1227.1,"endTime":1229.26,"body":"I don't, for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1227.1,"endTime":1229.26,"body":"some reason, this has reminded"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1229.26,"endTime":1232.98,"body":"me of the movie Sing, sing,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1229.26,"endTime":1232.98,"body":"which it's it's a beautiful"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1232.98,"endTime":1236.04,"body":"movie. Not many people have seen"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1232.98,"endTime":1236.04,"body":"it. It didn't make very, very"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1236.04,"endTime":1241.08,"body":"much money, but it's a true"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1236.04,"endTime":1241.08,"body":"story about Sing, sing, prison"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1241.08,"endTime":1245.1200000000001,"body":"and arts program and sing, sing."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1241.08,"endTime":1245.1200000000001,"body":"So they put on plays, and it's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1245.18,"endTime":1248.3600000000001,"body":"one of the best recidivism"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1245.18,"endTime":1248.3600000000001,"body":"programs. And in the United"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1248.3600000000001,"endTime":1252.5,"body":"States, more people stay out of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1248.3600000000001,"endTime":1252.5,"body":"jail when they go through this"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1252.5,"endTime":1256.28,"body":"program than any other program"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1252.5,"endTime":1256.28,"body":"in the US. But the thing that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1256.34,"endTime":1260.24,"body":"Coleman Domingo's character does"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1256.34,"endTime":1260.24,"body":"in the in the movie is he calls"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1260.24,"endTime":1264.28,"body":"people Beloved. COVID, they call"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1260.24,"endTime":1264.28,"body":"each other Beloved. So as"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1264.28,"endTime":1269.98,"body":"they're in a group together,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1264.28,"endTime":1269.98,"body":"they're seeing each other for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1270.22,"endTime":1276.22,"body":"their true identity as beloved"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1270.22,"endTime":1276.22,"body":"children of God before whatever"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1276.28,"endTime":1281.94,"body":"they did, you know, and we often"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1276.28,"endTime":1281.94,"body":"put whatever we did on us, and"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1281.94,"endTime":1286.74,"body":"so the belovedness is hidden"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1281.94,"endTime":1286.74,"body":"underneath all of the shame and"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1286.74,"endTime":1290.46,"body":"all of the the hurts and all the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1286.74,"endTime":1290.46,"body":"loss that we have in our life."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1291.0,"endTime":1295.98,"body":"And so we have to recover our"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1291.0,"endTime":1295.98,"body":"belovedness. And when we do"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1295.98,"endTime":1298.8,"body":"that, then we could actually see"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1295.98,"endTime":1298.8,"body":"belovedness in others, where we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1298.8,"endTime":1304.88,"body":"can see the face of Jesus in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1298.8,"endTime":1304.88,"body":"others. For you, where did you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1304.88,"endTime":1308.72,"body":"start to discover some of your"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1304.88,"endTime":1308.72,"body":"belovedness? Like, what does it"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1308.72,"endTime":1313.82,"body":"look like in Scripture to to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1308.72,"endTime":1313.82,"body":"unfold the belovedness of Amy?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1314.42,"endTime":1317.72,"body":"Well, again, the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1314.42,"endTime":1317.72,"body":"Song of Songs was administered"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1317.72,"endTime":1320.78,"body":"to me deeply. You know, going"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1317.72,"endTime":1320.78,"body":"through what I went through, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1320.78,"endTime":1324.88,"body":"know, a huge part of it was"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1320.78,"endTime":1324.88,"body":"being a woman, going through"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1324.88,"endTime":1328.42,"body":"that right, and speaking in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1324.88,"endTime":1328.42,"body":"these dynamics in the church of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1328.42,"endTime":1332.74,"body":"men and women, and being shamed"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1328.42,"endTime":1332.74,"body":"as a woman. And the words used"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1332.74,"endTime":1335.98,"body":"to shame me, you know Jezebel,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1332.74,"endTime":1335.98,"body":"the great whore of Babylon. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1335.98,"endTime":1339.34,"body":"know these you don't say that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1335.98,"endTime":1339.34,"body":"about men. The Song of Songs is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1339.34,"endTime":1343.32,"body":"like the woman is the dominant"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1339.34,"endTime":1343.32,"body":"voice in that book, and she"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1343.32,"endTime":1348.18,"body":"represents Christ's people, his"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1343.32,"endTime":1348.18,"body":"beloved, right, his church. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1348.18,"endTime":1352.26,"body":"she opens and closes the song."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1348.18,"endTime":1352.26,"body":"She rushes in immodestly from"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1352.26,"endTime":1356.46,"body":"the beginning, like saying what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1352.26,"endTime":1356.46,"body":"she wants. And there's also"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1356.46,"endTime":1360.54,"body":"parts in there, though, where"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1356.46,"endTime":1360.54,"body":"she can't find God, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1360.54,"endTime":1362.9,"body":"she's looking for him. There's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1360.54,"endTime":1362.9,"body":"these night scenes. She's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1362.9,"endTime":1366.74,"body":"abused, you know, by the the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1362.9,"endTime":1366.74,"body":"keepers, the the gatekeepers,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1367.28,"endTime":1372.5,"body":"the guards. And where, where is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1367.28,"endTime":1372.5,"body":"he? She can't find her lover,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1372.5,"endTime":1375.74,"body":"you know. And why isn't he there"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1372.5,"endTime":1375.74,"body":"for her? But then, you know, she"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1375.74,"endTime":1380.1200000000001,"body":"finds him again. So I love that,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1375.74,"endTime":1380.1200000000001,"body":"because I just think it really"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1380.1200000000001,"endTime":1385.54,"body":"takes you through so much of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1380.1200000000001,"endTime":1385.54,"body":"life, those words I take truly"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1385.54,"endTime":1389.56,"body":"to be like these. This is Christ"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1385.54,"endTime":1389.56,"body":"speaking to me, you know. And so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1389.56,"endTime":1395.56,"body":"he says, You are beautiful, my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1389.56,"endTime":1395.56,"body":"love. There is no flaw in you."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1396.28,"endTime":1401.94,"body":"And I just think, wow, like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1396.28,"endTime":1401.94,"body":"those words, I long to hear that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1401.94,"endTime":1406.02,"body":"from God, and it's because of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1401.94,"endTime":1406.02,"body":"Christ that he, you know, will"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1406.02,"endTime":1409.6200000000001,"body":"say that to us. And there's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1406.02,"endTime":1409.6200000000001,"body":"sense of receiving that right"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1409.6200000000001,"endTime":1413.52,"body":"now. You know, in the beginning"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1409.6200000000001,"endTime":1413.52,"body":"of the story, she says, Don't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1413.52,"endTime":1416.94,"body":"look at me, you know, I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1413.52,"endTime":1416.94,"body":"swarthy, and she's got the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1416.94,"endTime":1422.78,"body":"shame, and at the end, she's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1416.94,"endTime":1422.78,"body":"very different voice. It's so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1422.78,"endTime":1426.68,"body":"emotive, which is interesting,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1422.78,"endTime":1426.68,"body":"because I was in a denomination"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1426.68,"endTime":1430.04,"body":"that really took that away. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1426.68,"endTime":1430.04,"body":"know, it was so super"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1430.04,"endTime":1436.64,"body":"theological and so left brain"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1430.04,"endTime":1436.64,"body":"and analytical. And I think that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1436.94,"endTime":1441.08,"body":"one thing that attracted me to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1436.94,"endTime":1441.08,"body":"that was that I do have a more"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1441.08,"endTime":1444.82,"body":"contemplative, mystical kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1441.08,"endTime":1444.82,"body":"personality. And so I thought, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1444.82,"endTime":1447.82,"body":"need to hone this in, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1444.82,"endTime":1447.82,"body":"I need to be this, this, this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1447.82,"endTime":1453.16,"body":"and this, to go back and see,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1447.82,"endTime":1453.16,"body":"oh, man, this is in Scripture,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1453.58,"endTime":1460.06,"body":"and it's beautiful. There's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1453.58,"endTime":1460.06,"body":"reason why metaphor is used to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1460.06,"endTime":1463.68,"body":"teach in Scripture. You know it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1460.06,"endTime":1463.68,"body":"does more than just the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1463.68,"endTime":1467.4,"body":"prepositional statements. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1463.68,"endTime":1467.4,"body":"know it does more than the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1467.4,"endTime":1472.32,"body":"dogma. It directs our desires,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1467.4,"endTime":1472.32,"body":"it develops our longings. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1472.32,"endTime":1477.78,"body":"know it, it gives us this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1472.32,"endTime":1477.78,"body":"picture of, oh, you know, it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1477.9,"endTime":1483.56,"body":"beautiful. So, you know, poetry"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1477.9,"endTime":1483.56,"body":"can teach us in ways that just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1483.56,"endTime":1487.94,"body":"stating doctrine cannot"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1483.56,"endTime":1487.94,"body":"obviously, we need both. I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1488.0,"endTime":1491.24,"body":"that's something that really"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1488.0,"endTime":1491.24,"body":"helped me to know that unbeloved"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1491.48,"endTime":1498.02,"body":"that, and then coupled with, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1491.48,"endTime":1498.02,"body":"know, people in my life who the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1498.02,"endTime":1501.88,"body":"gig was up like, you know, even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1498.02,"endTime":1501.88,"body":"if people were saying horrible"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1501.88,"endTime":1506.8,"body":"things about me that weren't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1501.88,"endTime":1506.8,"body":"true. My reputation was publicly"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1506.8,"endTime":1511.66,"body":"ruined. I had to deal with what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1506.8,"endTime":1511.66,"body":"how do you live? Then do you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1511.66,"endTime":1515.56,"body":"keep defending yourself? I know"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1511.66,"endTime":1515.56,"body":"I had to look to myself, Okay. I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1515.56,"endTime":1517.78,"body":"know I'm not the things that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1515.56,"endTime":1517.78,"body":"these people are calling me, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1518.32,"endTime":1522.54,"body":"how am I going to respond? Who"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1518.32,"endTime":1522.54,"body":"Am I? And so the conflict itself"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1522.54,"endTime":1526.44,"body":"and the confrontation, the many,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1522.54,"endTime":1526.44,"body":"many confrontations I had to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1526.44,"endTime":1530.7,"body":"have, both with others and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1526.44,"endTime":1530.7,"body":"myself, I think, is another way"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1530.7,"endTime":1534.3600000000001,"body":"of saying, okay, even while now"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1530.7,"endTime":1534.3600000000001,"body":"I'm in the pit, Jesus is right"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1534.3600000000001,"endTime":1535.8,"body":"there beside me, it"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1535.8,"endTime":1538.14,"body":"reminds me."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1535.8,"endTime":1538.14,"body":"Well, it doesn't remind me, but"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1538.14,"endTime":1542.24,"body":"it tells me that if people are"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1538.14,"endTime":1542.24,"body":"going through what you went"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1542.24,"endTime":1546.08,"body":"through. If I'm your friend, I'm"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1542.24,"endTime":1546.08,"body":"important to you like I need to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1546.08,"endTime":1549.92,"body":"speak life and truth into you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1546.08,"endTime":1549.92,"body":"during that time. A lot of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1549.92,"endTime":1552.92,"body":"times, I don't know, a lot of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1549.92,"endTime":1552.92,"body":"times we everybody else ignores"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1552.92,"endTime":1555.44,"body":"it. We have to be very"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1552.92,"endTime":1555.44,"body":"intentional with the people in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1555.44,"endTime":1560.06,"body":"our lives, to move towards them,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1555.44,"endTime":1560.06,"body":"to see them for who they are,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1560.06,"endTime":1566.02,"body":"and then to help. Them see who"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1560.06,"endTime":1566.02,"body":"they are and not believe all the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1566.02,"endTime":1569.8600000000001,"body":"lies that are being thrown at"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1566.02,"endTime":1569.8600000000001,"body":"them. Because I think that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1569.8600000000001,"endTime":1570.64,"body":"happens a lot,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1571.0,"endTime":1573.28,"body":"right? And I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1571.0,"endTime":1573.28,"body":"another thing that happens a lot"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1573.28,"endTime":1577.1200000000001,"body":"is you look at people who are"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1573.28,"endTime":1577.1200000000001,"body":"like, who we'd call strong, who"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1577.1200000000001,"endTime":1580.3600000000001,"body":"can handle conflict well, who"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1577.1200000000001,"endTime":1580.3600000000001,"body":"you know, seem to hold"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1580.3600000000001,"endTime":1585.0,"body":"themselves together well, who"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1580.3600000000001,"endTime":1585.0,"body":"lead well? And you think, Okay,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1585.0,"endTime":1587.52,"body":"well, they're okay. And I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1585.0,"endTime":1587.52,"body":"a lot of times you don't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1587.52,"endTime":1591.3,"body":"realize, like, what that kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1587.52,"endTime":1591.3,"body":"strength takes and what is going"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1591.3,"endTime":1595.8,"body":"on in their inner world, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1591.3,"endTime":1595.8,"body":"know? And I know, for me, even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1596.4,"endTime":1600.0,"body":"see this started in 2020, all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1596.4,"endTime":1600.0,"body":"the horribleness when my book"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1600.0,"endTime":1603.6200000000001,"body":"recovering from biblical manhood"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1600.0,"endTime":1603.6200000000001,"body":"and womanhood came out. It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1604.1,"endTime":1611.72,"body":"2025 and I am still, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1604.1,"endTime":1611.72,"body":"like even now, is when my body"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1611.72,"endTime":1614.48,"body":"is telling me more about the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1611.72,"endTime":1614.48,"body":"trauma I went through. You know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1614.48,"endTime":1617.48,"body":"I've been holding on to it for"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1614.48,"endTime":1617.48,"body":"so long. So it's just like, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1617.48,"endTime":1622.6,"body":"think, for years, just trying to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1617.48,"endTime":1622.6,"body":"be like the mature one, trying"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1622.6,"endTime":1625.9,"body":"to address this in the best way."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1622.6,"endTime":1625.9,"body":"You know how? You know not that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1625.9,"endTime":1629.5,"body":"I didn't make mistakes and sin"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1625.9,"endTime":1629.5,"body":"and that and everything else."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1629.5,"endTime":1635.8600000000001,"body":"But now I feel like, wow. It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1629.5,"endTime":1635.8600000000001,"body":"not like, Oh, let me just take a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1635.8600000000001,"endTime":1640.96,"body":"year to heal. Here does some"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1635.8600000000001,"endTime":1640.96,"body":"real damage. And so those"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1640.96,"endTime":1645.42,"body":"friendships, who, who were"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1640.96,"endTime":1645.42,"body":"there, who made me realize too,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1645.42,"endTime":1649.2,"body":"like, it doesn't matter. Doesn't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1645.42,"endTime":1649.2,"body":"matter that they say you're the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1649.2,"endTime":1652.44,"body":"great whore of Babylon. It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1649.2,"endTime":1652.44,"body":"horrible. They're doing that."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1652.44,"endTime":1655.5,"body":"That matters, that they're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1652.44,"endTime":1655.5,"body":"church leaders. We still love"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1655.5,"endTime":1658.68,"body":"you like, you know, like, that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1655.5,"endTime":1658.68,"body":"not that doesn't matter what's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1658.68,"endTime":1659.58,"body":"being said there,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1659.82,"endTime":1662.3,"body":"you said"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1659.82,"endTime":1662.3,"body":"something right there that your"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1662.3,"endTime":1665.9,"body":"body is just keep catching up."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1662.3,"endTime":1665.9,"body":"And a lot of times, I mean, you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1665.9,"endTime":1669.08,"body":"were in denomination that you're"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1665.9,"endTime":1669.08,"body":"almost like heads on a stick,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1669.08,"endTime":1674.6,"body":"like it's, it's about the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1669.08,"endTime":1674.6,"body":"intellect and and the mind. How"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1674.6,"endTime":1677.96,"body":"have you started to learn that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1674.6,"endTime":1677.96,"body":"actually, trauma and all of this"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1677.96,"endTime":1681.02,"body":"actually, is stored in your"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1677.96,"endTime":1681.02,"body":"body? Has there been any"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1681.2,"endTime":1684.82,"body":"anything that you've done with"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1681.2,"endTime":1684.82,"body":"your body, that what we can do"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1684.82,"endTime":1690.82,"body":"to actually move us to to take"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1684.82,"endTime":1690.82,"body":"off the masks, to say, Oh, I am"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1691.3,"endTime":1695.8600000000001,"body":"me, because I could actually"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1691.3,"endTime":1695.8600000000001,"body":"heal. Because Jesus is an"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1695.8600000000001,"endTime":1701.7,"body":"embodied God. He came in flesh,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1695.8600000000001,"endTime":1701.7,"body":"the body, I think is really"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1701.7,"endTime":1705.66,"body":"important, and you suffered. So"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1701.7,"endTime":1705.66,"body":"what, what has the body been for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1705.66,"endTime":1707.64,"body":"you, and how have that helped"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1705.66,"endTime":1707.64,"body":"you heal?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1708.3,"endTime":1710.04,"body":"You know, even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1708.3,"endTime":1710.04,"body":"though I was in that kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1710.04,"endTime":1713.16,"body":"denomination, I've always been"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1710.04,"endTime":1713.16,"body":"very much an embodied person. I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1713.16,"endTime":1716.88,"body":"grew up with my dad teaching"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1713.16,"endTime":1716.88,"body":"martial arts and jiu jitsu in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1716.88,"endTime":1722.06,"body":"our home. You know, my mom, even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1716.88,"endTime":1722.06,"body":"in the because we had a dojo, my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1722.06,"endTime":1725.06,"body":"mom used it to teach aerobics to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1722.06,"endTime":1725.06,"body":"the neighbors in the evenings,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1725.06,"endTime":1729.38,"body":"you know, like, very physical"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1725.06,"endTime":1729.38,"body":"family. So, you know, that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1729.38,"endTime":1733.88,"body":"something I've carried through"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1729.38,"endTime":1733.88,"body":"my adulthood. Is a physicality"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1734.24,"endTime":1737.66,"body":"is very important to me. So I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1734.24,"endTime":1737.66,"body":"thought I was doing good,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1737.84,"endTime":1741.02,"body":"Joshua, I thought, like, I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1737.84,"endTime":1741.02,"body":"doing this, like I'm I'm reading"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1741.02,"endTime":1744.34,"body":"books, The Body Keeps the Score."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1741.02,"endTime":1744.34,"body":"You know, I'm like, doing all so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1744.34,"endTime":1748.6,"body":"I felt like, you know, I'll do"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1744.34,"endTime":1748.6,"body":"some yoga here, there. I felt"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1748.6,"endTime":1752.5,"body":"like I was doing well. But the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1748.6,"endTime":1752.5,"body":"thing is, I think, which is the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1752.5,"endTime":1755.92,"body":"craziest trick you can play on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1752.5,"endTime":1755.92,"body":"yourself, is like I was trying"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1755.92,"endTime":1760.78,"body":"so hard to be okay and tell"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1755.92,"endTime":1760.78,"body":"everybody I'm okay, but inside"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1760.78,"endTime":1764.7,"body":"my body was like, you're not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1760.78,"endTime":1764.7,"body":"okay. You know, you have got to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1764.7,"endTime":1768.72,"body":"be able to say this to yourself"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1764.7,"endTime":1768.72,"body":"and to others. And you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1768.72,"endTime":1773.1,"body":"it's hard when people you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1768.72,"endTime":1773.1,"body":"even leaders who you like, to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1773.16,"endTime":1777.54,"body":"repair some things with, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1773.16,"endTime":1777.54,"body":"know, or friends, will say"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1777.54,"endTime":1780.3600000000001,"body":"things like, well, you know, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1777.54,"endTime":1780.3600000000001,"body":"was going to say this, but I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1780.3600000000001,"endTime":1783.44,"body":"didn't, because of your trauma,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1780.3600000000001,"endTime":1783.44,"body":"you know, like people like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1783.44,"endTime":1787.22,"body":"afraid, tiptoeing, like you're a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1783.44,"endTime":1787.22,"body":"bomb that could explode. But"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1787.22,"endTime":1790.7,"body":"really, it's a manipulative way"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1787.22,"endTime":1790.7,"body":"of not moving towards repair."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1791.54,"endTime":1795.32,"body":"And wanting you to put on this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1791.54,"endTime":1795.32,"body":"face so they can feel better"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1795.32,"endTime":1799.16,"body":"about themselves. And I think I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1795.32,"endTime":1799.16,"body":"was doing that in a lot of ways."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1799.22,"endTime":1802.72,"body":"You know, putting on this I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1799.22,"endTime":1802.72,"body":"okay face, and, you know, you do"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1802.72,"endTime":1805.96,"body":"it for your kids and and all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1802.72,"endTime":1805.96,"body":"that as well, and you want to be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1805.96,"endTime":1809.56,"body":"able to just move on with your"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1805.96,"endTime":1809.56,"body":"life. Yeah, my back and my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1809.56,"endTime":1813.52,"body":"shoulders are like, no, no. It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1809.56,"endTime":1813.52,"body":"not that easy. You know? I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1813.52,"endTime":1816.88,"body":"that's a blessing in a lot of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1813.52,"endTime":1816.88,"body":"ways, right? Because this stuff"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1816.88,"endTime":1822.18,"body":"can you can hold in and lead to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1816.88,"endTime":1822.18,"body":"heart attacks. So my muscles are"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1822.18,"endTime":1828.42,"body":"telling me, No, actually, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1822.18,"endTime":1828.42,"body":"are tense as can be because"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1828.6,"endTime":1832.68,"body":"you've been trying to be okay"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1828.6,"endTime":1832.68,"body":"this whole time. Help other"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1832.68,"endTime":1836.64,"body":"people be okay. But you know, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1832.68,"endTime":1836.64,"body":"think that's another thing too."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1836.64,"endTime":1840.1200000000001,"body":"Is I'm trying to learn to listen"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1836.64,"endTime":1840.1200000000001,"body":"to my body better, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1840.1200000000001,"endTime":1844.76,"body":"journaling has really helped"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1840.1200000000001,"endTime":1844.76,"body":"with that is to not keep acting"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1844.76,"endTime":1847.1,"body":"like you're okay when you're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1844.76,"endTime":1847.1,"body":"not. Then"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1847.1,"endTime":1849.14,"body":"let's get into"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1847.1,"endTime":1849.14,"body":"some journaling. Because I think"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1849.26,"endTime":1854.1200000000001,"body":"you've mentioned a few times"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1849.26,"endTime":1854.1200000000001,"body":"it's been very key for you take"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1854.1200000000001,"endTime":1857.66,"body":"us through a journaling"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1854.1200000000001,"endTime":1857.66,"body":"practice. What what's a good"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1857.66,"endTime":1860.9,"body":"journaling practice and why is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1857.66,"endTime":1860.9,"body":"it healing? What's helpful?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":1860.98,"endTime":1862.6,"body":"Within journaling for us."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1863.32,"endTime":1866.74,"body":"Ah, man, well, I've"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1863.32,"endTime":1866.74,"body":"always been, you know, I'm a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1866.74,"endTime":1871.54,"body":"writer, so journaling comes"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1866.74,"endTime":1871.54,"body":"pretty naturally for me. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1871.54,"endTime":1875.68,"body":"not one who likes to follow a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1871.54,"endTime":1875.68,"body":"program, you know, I like to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1875.68,"endTime":1880.06,"body":"have a place that it kind of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1875.68,"endTime":1880.06,"body":"mentally gets me ready and, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1880.06,"endTime":1884.58,"body":"know, 1530 minutes, depending on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1880.06,"endTime":1884.58,"body":"what's in your head that day."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1884.58,"endTime":1887.76,"body":"And some of it's just getting"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1884.58,"endTime":1887.76,"body":"out dumb stuff that's circling"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1887.76,"endTime":1891.0,"body":"around your head, you know. But"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1887.76,"endTime":1891.0,"body":"then other parts of it are like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1891.0,"endTime":1894.9,"body":"getting out things that you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1891.0,"endTime":1894.9,"body":"you're afraid to say out loud,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1895.44,"endTime":1900.24,"body":"you know, it's okay, nobody's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1895.44,"endTime":1900.24,"body":"reading it out there. Or getting"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1900.24,"endTime":1904.22,"body":"out like things that you're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1900.24,"endTime":1904.22,"body":"afraid to say to God, as if he"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1904.22,"endTime":1907.04,"body":"doesn't know what's in there,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1904.22,"endTime":1907.04,"body":"you know? And I think that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1907.04,"endTime":1910.04,"body":"where the Song of Songs has been"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1907.04,"endTime":1910.04,"body":"so helpful for me, too. Because,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1910.04,"endTime":1912.44,"body":"you know, here we have this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1910.04,"endTime":1912.44,"body":"woman's voice representative of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1912.44,"endTime":1916.7,"body":"ours. And I'm like, wow, you can"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1912.44,"endTime":1916.7,"body":"talk that way to God. She lays"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1916.7,"endTime":1919.76,"body":"it out, you know, she talks"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1916.7,"endTime":1919.76,"body":"about things. So I've been doing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1919.76,"endTime":1923.8,"body":"that more, and so it's weird, my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1919.76,"endTime":1923.8,"body":"journaling is kind of in and out"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1923.98,"endTime":1927.1,"body":"with conversation with God as"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1923.98,"endTime":1927.1,"body":"well, and trying to listen"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1927.28,"endTime":1930.58,"body":"during that as well. So it can"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1927.28,"endTime":1930.58,"body":"be very prayerful, but not in,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1931.0,"endTime":1933.16,"body":"you know, I kind of, I was just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1931.0,"endTime":1933.16,"body":"writing something about the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1933.16,"endTime":1937.06,"body":"book, and it was kind of a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1933.16,"endTime":1937.06,"body":"summation thing for my sub stack"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1937.06,"endTime":1939.82,"body":"that I'm going to place later."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1937.06,"endTime":1939.82,"body":"But I remember growing up being"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1939.82,"endTime":1945.1200000000001,"body":"taught like, you know, how to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1939.82,"endTime":1945.1200000000001,"body":"pray using acts and affirmation,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1945.1200000000001,"endTime":1948.9,"body":"confession, thankfulness, or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1945.1200000000001,"endTime":1948.9,"body":"whatever, as supplication. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1948.9,"endTime":1952.6200000000001,"body":"I'm like, what bull crap, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1948.9,"endTime":1952.6200000000001,"body":"know, like, so manipulative and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1952.6200000000001,"endTime":1956.04,"body":"fake and like, you know, it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1952.6200000000001,"endTime":1956.04,"body":"just, like, do you talk to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1956.04,"endTime":1959.04,"body":"anyone else that way? You know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1956.04,"endTime":1959.04,"body":"it's, we're not taught to pray"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1959.04,"endTime":1962.48,"body":"like that in Scripture, like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1959.04,"endTime":1962.48,"body":"it's just, it's it's just not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1962.54,"endTime":1966.2,"body":"personal. It's, you know, like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1962.54,"endTime":1966.2,"body":"worksheet you're filling out or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1966.2,"endTime":1969.5,"body":"something. It's formulaic. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1966.2,"endTime":1969.5,"body":"so, you know, another thing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1969.5,"endTime":1973.16,"body":"that's really helped me is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1969.5,"endTime":1973.16,"body":"Teresa St. Teresa's the interior"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1973.16,"endTime":1977.06,"body":"Castle is that what it's called"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1973.16,"endTime":1977.06,"body":"her book really good. It's more"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1977.06,"endTime":1980.78,"body":"mystical. But, you know, the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1977.06,"endTime":1980.78,"body":"premise behind it too, is that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1980.9,"endTime":1986.6200000000001,"body":"if God is within us as believers"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1980.9,"endTime":1986.6200000000001,"body":"through His Holy Spirit, then in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1986.6200000000001,"endTime":1994.96,"body":"our being, somehow is God's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1986.6200000000001,"endTime":1994.96,"body":"tabernacle where he delights to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1994.96,"endTime":2001.58,"body":"be in. You know, he delights to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":1994.96,"endTime":2001.58,"body":"be there. And so you know, her"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2001.58,"endTime":2008.84,"body":"book is about helping you get to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2001.58,"endTime":2008.84,"body":"that core of communion with God"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2008.84,"endTime":2016.58,"body":"who delights to dwell in you and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2008.84,"endTime":2016.58,"body":"in your neighbor. How amazing is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2016.58,"endTime":2021.2,"body":"that? And so there's another"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2016.58,"endTime":2021.2,"body":"book called entering the castle."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2021.44,"endTime":2024.58,"body":"I want to say the author's name"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2021.44,"endTime":2024.58,"body":"is Carolyn, miss, but I might"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2024.58,"endTime":2028.48,"body":"have that wrong. That book is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2024.58,"endTime":2028.48,"body":"actually about doing the work."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2028.9,"endTime":2032.44,"body":"And so she's got a lot of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2028.9,"endTime":2032.44,"body":"journaling questions in there,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2032.92,"endTime":2036.04,"body":"and they're hard. They're facing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2032.92,"endTime":2036.04,"body":"yourself, kind of journaling"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2036.04,"endTime":2039.28,"body":"questions. And you know, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2036.04,"endTime":2039.28,"body":"remember one of them was like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2039.28,"endTime":2042.84,"body":"name eight times you humiliated"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2039.28,"endTime":2042.84,"body":"someone else or something like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2042.84,"endTime":2045.54,"body":"that. And I'm like, Oh, we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2042.84,"endTime":2045.54,"body":"better do that, you know? And I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2045.54,"endTime":2048.96,"body":"start writing, and I'm like, Oh,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2045.54,"endTime":2048.96,"body":"my goodness. Like, what have I?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2049.74,"endTime":2056.58,"body":"Who am, a lot, I found that kind"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2049.74,"endTime":2056.58,"body":"of stuff extremely helpful. You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2056.58,"endTime":2060.72,"body":"know, it's just amazing. Like we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2056.58,"endTime":2060.72,"body":"all know that. You know, in your"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2060.72,"endTime":2064.16,"body":"friendships and your even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2060.72,"endTime":2064.16,"body":"acquaintances, you can know"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2064.16,"endTime":2066.44,"body":"something about someone that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2064.16,"endTime":2066.44,"body":"they don't really don't get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2066.44,"endTime":2070.2799999999997,"body":"about themselves pretty quickly"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2066.44,"endTime":2070.2799999999997,"body":"and pretty easily, you know. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2070.7599999999998,"endTime":2075.3199999999997,"body":"I mean, that's so crazy, isn't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2070.7599999999998,"endTime":2075.3199999999997,"body":"it? And to try to get in touch"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2075.3199999999997,"endTime":2078.98,"body":"with that how other people"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2075.3199999999997,"endTime":2078.98,"body":"perceive you, you things that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2078.98,"endTime":2082.72,"body":"you're projecting, that you just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2078.98,"endTime":2082.72,"body":"have no clue. And that's really"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2082.72,"endTime":2085.72,"body":"where my face part gets into it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2082.72,"endTime":2085.72,"body":"too, you know, like that weird"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2085.72,"endTime":2092.56,"body":"want. It's our honorable duty,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2085.72,"endTime":2092.56,"body":"special privilege, to help"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2092.62,"endTime":2095.7999999999997,"body":"people dig their own selves out."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2096.04,"endTime":2098.2,"body":"That's so good."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2096.04,"endTime":2098.2,"body":"I think we we need to do that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2098.2,"endTime":2105.54,"body":"work. And if I thought early on"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2098.2,"endTime":2105.54,"body":"that my body is a is a temple,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2105.54,"endTime":2109.14,"body":"right? This is what was told. I"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2105.54,"endTime":2109.14,"body":"was like, Okay, I can't put"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2109.14,"endTime":2112.5,"body":"anything bad in my body. I gotta"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2109.14,"endTime":2112.5,"body":"be clean. I gotta make sure that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2112.5,"endTime":2117.12,"body":"I work out and God's gonna be"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2112.5,"endTime":2117.12,"body":"okay with my body. But when"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2117.18,"endTime":2121.94,"body":"Theresa vavila is talking about"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2117.18,"endTime":2121.94,"body":"that, he delights in you already"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2121.94,"endTime":2125.9,"body":"that the tabernacle is inside of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2121.94,"endTime":2125.9,"body":"you, and he already delights in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2125.9,"endTime":2131.96,"body":"you. That puts me in a different"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2125.9,"endTime":2131.96,"body":"starting place of I'm already"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2131.96,"endTime":2136.58,"body":"delighted in, and then I could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2131.96,"endTime":2136.58,"body":"start to move and figure out who"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2136.88,"endTime":2142.66,"body":"I am, who I am, the one that God"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2136.88,"endTime":2142.66,"body":"delights in. That's a huge"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2142.66,"endTime":2146.2,"body":"different starting place than,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2142.66,"endTime":2146.2,"body":"isn't it what we were taught"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2146.2,"endTime":2146.92,"body":"growing up?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2147.52,"endTime":2150.52,"body":"I know, I know, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2147.52,"endTime":2150.52,"body":"it's, it's like, almost like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2150.52,"endTime":2154.12,"body":"we're afraid to teach that, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2150.52,"endTime":2154.12,"body":"know, but I don't think it leads"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2154.12,"endTime":2157.06,"body":"to bad behavior, you know, or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2154.12,"endTime":2157.06,"body":"Senate opposite. It"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2157.06,"endTime":2160.84,"body":"makes me want to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2157.06,"endTime":2160.84,"body":"do better, right? But it's also."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2160.98,"endTime":2161.22,"body":"Freeze"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2161.22,"endTime":2164.94,"body":"you to like, not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2161.22,"endTime":2164.94,"body":"judge yourself in all that, be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2164.94,"endTime":2170.46,"body":"more curious and and to be able,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2164.94,"endTime":2170.46,"body":"I think, to truly be repentant,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2170.46,"endTime":2175.98,"body":"you know, because you can make"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2170.46,"endTime":2175.98,"body":"that turn, and it's okay to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2175.98,"endTime":2179.4,"body":"relearn and say, Oh, got that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2175.98,"endTime":2179.4,"body":"wrong, you know,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2180.48,"endTime":2182.72,"body":"I don't know why"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2180.48,"endTime":2182.72,"body":"that's so hard, right? It's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2182.72,"endTime":2186.68,"body":"really hard. How can we, how can"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2182.72,"endTime":2186.68,"body":"we physically work on our faces"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2186.92,"endTime":2191.78,"body":"that we can start to be a face"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2186.92,"endTime":2191.78,"body":"that delights in other people,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2192.02,"endTime":2196.4,"body":"that is the face of Christ. I"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2192.02,"endTime":2196.4,"body":"know that some people see my"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2196.4,"endTime":2200.66,"body":"face and I look angry. They"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2196.4,"endTime":2200.66,"body":"think I'm mad at them or"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2200.66,"endTime":2205.18,"body":"something, because I have, you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2200.66,"endTime":2205.18,"body":"know, a face that doesn't always"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2205.2400000000002,"endTime":2209.92,"body":"project delight and love. How"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2205.2400000000002,"endTime":2209.92,"body":"can I work on my face? How could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2209.92,"endTime":2212.5,"body":"I get it better so I could be"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2209.92,"endTime":2212.5,"body":"better for other people? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2212.5,"endTime":2212.68,"body":"well,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2212.68,"endTime":2214.6,"body":"I won't think you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2212.68,"endTime":2214.6,"body":"want to put something on that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2214.6,"endTime":2219.16,"body":"not there, right? But one thing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2214.6,"endTime":2219.16,"body":"I talk about in the book is this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2219.16,"endTime":2223.2,"body":"idea of benediction. And you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2219.16,"endTime":2223.2,"body":"know, we have that as part of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2223.2,"endTime":2226.98,"body":"our worship service. The end of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2223.2,"endTime":2226.98,"body":"the service, you see it in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2226.98,"endTime":2231.36,"body":"numbers where, you know, one of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2226.98,"endTime":2231.36,"body":"the great blessings in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2231.36,"endTime":2238.08,"body":"benediction is May God's face"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2231.36,"endTime":2238.08,"body":"shine upon you. And what does"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2238.08,"endTime":2241.88,"body":"that mean? You know, why do we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2238.08,"endTime":2241.88,"body":"really want that like that makes"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2241.88,"endTime":2245.3,"body":"my heart kind of leap a little"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2241.88,"endTime":2245.3,"body":"bit to think about. And so, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2245.3,"endTime":2248.84,"body":"know, even if something is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2245.3,"endTime":2248.84,"body":"simple, I think, and Emmanuel"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2248.84,"endTime":2253.52,"body":"Levinas talks about this, when"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2248.84,"endTime":2253.52,"body":"we encounter another face, we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2253.52,"endTime":2257.9,"body":"actually can strip that face"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2253.52,"endTime":2257.9,"body":"naked and get behind their"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2257.9,"endTime":2262.42,"body":"countenance. But what we find is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2257.9,"endTime":2262.42,"body":"they're vulnerable, right? Like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2262.42,"endTime":2266.08,"body":"in that moment, we could"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2262.42,"endTime":2266.08,"body":"liquidate that person, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2266.2,"endTime":2270.28,"body":"everybody holds that, and we all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2266.2,"endTime":2270.28,"body":"know it, and that's why we put"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2270.28,"endTime":2274.48,"body":"these defenses up, right? And so"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2270.28,"endTime":2274.48,"body":"he calls the commandment of God,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2274.48,"endTime":2277.96,"body":"and the face is, Thou shalt not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2274.48,"endTime":2277.96,"body":"kill. When we see another face,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2278.08,"endTime":2281.58,"body":"we are awakened to that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2278.08,"endTime":2281.58,"body":"commandment. And that's what he"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2281.58,"endTime":2284.82,"body":"calls like. Our whole"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2281.58,"endTime":2284.82,"body":"righteousness of being like the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2284.82,"endTime":2287.7,"body":"book is called, is it righteous"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2284.82,"endTime":2287.7,"body":"to be like? That's a question,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2287.7,"endTime":2293.52,"body":"right? And for him, it is yes,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2287.7,"endTime":2293.52,"body":"because my face awakens you and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2293.52,"endTime":2296.58,"body":"really to love, right? The"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2293.52,"endTime":2296.58,"body":"opposite side of Thou shalt not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2296.58,"endTime":2302.48,"body":"kill is to bless, to love, which"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2296.58,"endTime":2302.48,"body":"is what God does, which is what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2302.48,"endTime":2305.66,"body":"we are to do, and it's the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2302.48,"endTime":2305.66,"body":"greatest commandment, right? The"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2305.66,"endTime":2309.14,"body":"second one like it is to love"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2305.66,"endTime":2309.14,"body":"your neighbor as yourself. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2309.56,"endTime":2313.64,"body":"that's because that is loving"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2309.56,"endTime":2313.64,"body":"God with all our and with all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2313.64,"endTime":2317.18,"body":"our mind, because he's in them."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2313.64,"endTime":2317.18,"body":"I think that something very"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2317.18,"endTime":2322.12,"body":"simple is in our benediction,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2317.18,"endTime":2322.12,"body":"when we meet faces with somebody"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2322.12,"endTime":2326.62,"body":"else that to really show It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2322.12,"endTime":2326.62,"body":"good that you're alive. I'm"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2326.62,"endTime":2330.64,"body":"happy to see you, to give that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2326.62,"endTime":2330.64,"body":"kind of blessing. And I even"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2330.76,"endTime":2333.94,"body":"that sounds fabulous, but what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2330.76,"endTime":2333.94,"body":"does that look like for your"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2333.94,"endTime":2338.56,"body":"enemies, you know, being real,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2333.94,"endTime":2338.56,"body":"you know. And so I journal like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2338.56,"endTime":2341.58,"body":"I share journal entries in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2338.56,"endTime":2341.58,"body":"book. And, you know, I journal"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2341.58,"endTime":2345.2400000000002,"body":"through that a little bit like,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2341.58,"endTime":2345.2400000000002,"body":"what would it look like if I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2345.2400000000002,"endTime":2349.02,"body":"were to see this elder who said"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2345.2400000000002,"endTime":2349.02,"body":"this about me when I ran into"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2349.02,"endTime":2352.08,"body":"them, you know, like, and, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2349.02,"endTime":2352.08,"body":"know, even some basic"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2352.08,"endTime":2356.46,"body":"recognition. And I had to do"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2352.08,"endTime":2356.46,"body":"that work before I would run"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2356.46,"endTime":2362.2400000000002,"body":"into them, basic recognition,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2356.46,"endTime":2362.2400000000002,"body":"that God is kind to this person."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2362.96,"endTime":2367.52,"body":"God is kind to this person. How"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2362.96,"endTime":2367.52,"body":"can I recognize that in my face?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2367.58,"endTime":2370.82,"body":"How can I recognize that in my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2367.58,"endTime":2370.82,"body":"interaction, in my countenance,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2370.82,"endTime":2374.9,"body":"even in an exchange, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2370.82,"endTime":2374.9,"body":"even if there are no words"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2374.9,"endTime":2378.86,"body":"given, but you know, there's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2374.9,"endTime":2378.86,"body":"humility that happens when I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2378.86,"endTime":2382.12,"body":"think about that right, and I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2378.86,"endTime":2382.12,"body":"have the opportunity to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2382.12,"endTime":2385.84,"body":"liquidate that person, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2382.12,"endTime":2385.84,"body":"that's the blessing, is just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2385.84,"endTime":2389.44,"body":"recognizing, you know, in that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2385.84,"endTime":2389.44,"body":"relationship God is kind of that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2389.44,"endTime":2394.78,"body":"person. So I think that it's not"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2389.44,"endTime":2394.78,"body":"as easy as just saying this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2394.78,"endTime":2398.14,"body":"everybody with your face, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2394.78,"endTime":2398.14,"body":"know, but it's real work, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2398.14,"endTime":2401.16,"body":"it's different, because we're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2398.14,"endTime":2401.16,"body":"humans and we're unique and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2401.16,"endTime":2404.76,"body":"wonderful and complicated and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2401.16,"endTime":2404.76,"body":"complex. So I think it's great"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2404.76,"endTime":2406.68,"body":"to be able to think through"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2404.76,"endTime":2406.68,"body":"those things"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2407.16,"endTime":2414.0,"body":"help us as"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2407.16,"endTime":2414.0,"body":"fighting polarized American Oh,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2414.0,"endTime":2420.36,"body":"man, people, yeah, to be to be"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2414.0,"endTime":2420.36,"body":"better, to figure out how we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2420.36,"endTime":2423.86,"body":"could, how we could see"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2420.36,"endTime":2423.86,"body":"everybody Well, the problem"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2423.86,"endTime":2426.8,"body":"everybody's an enemy at the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2423.86,"endTime":2426.8,"body":"moment, like everybody's an"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2426.8,"endTime":2433.28,"body":"enemy, and we're starting, we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2426.8,"endTime":2433.28,"body":"start out shouting, and so what?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2433.28,"endTime":2437.6,"body":"What's the work that we have to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2433.28,"endTime":2437.6,"body":"do to counteract that? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2437.6,"endTime":2441.02,"body":"come in a different posture to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2437.6,"endTime":2441.02,"body":"then maybe diffuse something so"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2441.02,"endTime":2442.78,"body":"we could start to see each other"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2441.02,"endTime":2442.78,"body":"again."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2443.68,"endTime":2447.7,"body":"Yeah, see each other"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2443.68,"endTime":2447.7,"body":"again. I like that. I mean, this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2447.7,"endTime":2453.34,"body":"is above my pay grade, but you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2447.7,"endTime":2453.34,"body":"know, each one of us really does"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2453.34,"endTime":2456.64,"body":"have to do that individual work."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2453.34,"endTime":2456.64,"body":"And you know, I have some strong"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2456.64,"endTime":2459.34,"body":"conviction, convictions"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2456.64,"endTime":2459.34,"body":"politically. And you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2459.34,"endTime":2462.36,"body":"within my own family, there are."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2459.34,"endTime":2462.36,"body":"Are strongly different"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2462.78,"endTime":2467.58,"body":"conviction and extended family."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2462.78,"endTime":2467.58,"body":"So I think that's where I start"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2467.58,"endTime":2472.62,"body":"first, because that's the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2467.58,"endTime":2472.62,"body":"hardest and within myself. But"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2472.62,"endTime":2477.48,"body":"then also to be like, All right,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2472.62,"endTime":2477.48,"body":"here's a person that I know and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2477.48,"endTime":2484.34,"body":"love, and I don't think they're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2477.48,"endTime":2484.34,"body":"idiots. They have many, many"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2484.34,"endTime":2488.84,"body":"great values and intelligence."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2484.34,"endTime":2488.84,"body":"And obviously I can't understand"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2488.84,"endTime":2494.48,"body":"how these things go together,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2488.84,"endTime":2494.48,"body":"you know. But to try to see like"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2494.48,"endTime":2499.94,"body":"okay, where to ask good"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2494.48,"endTime":2499.94,"body":"questions, you know, and to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2499.94,"endTime":2506.62,"body":"recognize what values do connect"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2499.94,"endTime":2506.62,"body":"and then to say, like, well, we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2506.62,"endTime":2510.46,"body":"share this value however, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2506.62,"endTime":2510.46,"body":"know, this is how I see it play"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2510.46,"endTime":2515.38,"body":"out. And this is how you see it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2510.46,"endTime":2515.38,"body":"play out, you know. But I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2515.38,"endTime":2518.62,"body":"that's it is so hard. Like, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2515.38,"endTime":2518.62,"body":"mean, there are plenty of times"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2518.62,"endTime":2522.84,"body":"where it's just like better to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2518.62,"endTime":2522.84,"body":"not talk about politics with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2522.84,"endTime":2528.9,"body":"some people so that I can still"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2522.84,"endTime":2528.9,"body":"love them. You know? Well, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2528.9,"endTime":2533.94,"body":"feel like I can also say I still"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2528.9,"endTime":2533.94,"body":"value this person so much."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2533.94,"endTime":2537.84,"body":"There's other things I can learn"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2533.94,"endTime":2537.84,"body":"from this person still too, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2537.9,"endTime":2539.1,"body":"God is kind to them."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2541.38,"endTime":2543.56,"body":"So this is what"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2541.38,"endTime":2543.56,"body":"happens when, when our identity"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2543.56,"endTime":2547.82,"body":"and belonging happen and we get"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2543.56,"endTime":2547.82,"body":"caught up into something that is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2547.82,"endTime":2551.84,"body":"fleeting, that could actually go"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2547.82,"endTime":2551.84,"body":"away. Then when it does go away,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2551.84,"endTime":2555.68,"body":"then we have to try to figure"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2551.84,"endTime":2555.68,"body":"out who we are again and again"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2555.68,"endTime":2560.3,"body":"and again and again, and so we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2555.68,"endTime":2560.3,"body":"get scared. I think we're"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2560.3,"endTime":2564.34,"body":"running on fear, like the whole"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2560.3,"endTime":2564.34,"body":"the whole world is running on"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2564.34,"endTime":2568.2400000000002,"body":"fear at the moment, and so,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2564.34,"endTime":2568.2400000000002,"body":"because we are so fearful, how"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2568.2400000000002,"endTime":2571.2400000000002,"body":"do we move towards the face of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2568.2400000000002,"endTime":2571.2400000000002,"body":"Jesus, and how does that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2571.2400000000002,"endTime":2578.14,"body":"encounter help us dispel some of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2571.2400000000002,"endTime":2578.14,"body":"that fear and to receive His"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2578.14,"endTime":2582.06,"body":"love so that We can be people of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2578.14,"endTime":2582.06,"body":"love,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2582.12,"endTime":2586.56,"body":"yeah, well, and we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2582.12,"endTime":2586.56,"body":"have to face our fear. I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2586.56,"endTime":2588.96,"body":"we covered like we stuff the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2586.56,"endTime":2588.96,"body":"fear down, and we cover it up"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2589.02,"endTime":2591.78,"body":"with all these things that we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2589.02,"endTime":2591.78,"body":"think will fix it, but we don't"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2591.78,"endTime":2595.2,"body":"actually face the fear itself."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2591.78,"endTime":2595.2,"body":"What is the core of that fear?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2595.5,"endTime":2599.76,"body":"And sometimes we'll face the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2595.5,"endTime":2599.76,"body":"surface of it, but not really"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2600.36,"endTime":2603.92,"body":"what's behind it, and that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2600.36,"endTime":2603.92,"body":"where I think the journal work"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2603.92,"endTime":2609.56,"body":"is really helpful, too. But to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2603.92,"endTime":2609.56,"body":"be able to say I'm terrified,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2610.28,"endTime":2615.86,"body":"why am I? Why am I terrified?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2610.28,"endTime":2615.86,"body":"And and to really work that out,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2616.28,"endTime":2620.06,"body":"and let's go worst case scenario"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2616.28,"endTime":2620.06,"body":"of what I'm terrified of, who"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2620.06,"endTime":2625.0,"body":"will I be then, and will God be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2620.06,"endTime":2625.0,"body":"there? Who will be there? You"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2625.0,"endTime":2631.06,"body":"know? So I think that we get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2625.0,"endTime":2631.06,"body":"caught in this loop of fear and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2631.06,"endTime":2635.08,"body":"trying to get past the fear,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2631.06,"endTime":2635.08,"body":"when really we need to face the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2635.08,"endTime":2639.1,"body":"fear, you know, ask some of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2635.08,"endTime":2639.1,"body":"those more existential questions"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2639.1,"endTime":2643.62,"body":"that we can even find"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2639.1,"endTime":2643.62,"body":"meaningfulness there where we"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2643.62,"endTime":2648.36,"body":"are now, and we have to be in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2643.62,"endTime":2648.36,"body":"this place now. We can't get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2648.36,"endTime":2651.18,"body":"past it. So what does that mean"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2648.36,"endTime":2651.18,"body":"for us? You"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2651.2400000000002,"endTime":2653.46,"body":"talked about"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2651.2400000000002,"endTime":2653.46,"body":"journaling a lot, and that's one"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2653.46,"endTime":2656.58,"body":"way that we could start to find"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2653.46,"endTime":2656.58,"body":"the face of Jesus and that he"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2656.58,"endTime":2659.16,"body":"could encounter us. Are there"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2656.58,"endTime":2659.16,"body":"any other practices that could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2659.16,"endTime":2662.6,"body":"help us find his face, where he"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2659.16,"endTime":2662.6,"body":"could find us, and we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2662.6,"endTime":2666.14,"body":"actually realize that he's, he"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2662.6,"endTime":2666.14,"body":"is actually looking at us."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2666.26,"endTime":2668.9,"body":"Yeah. I mean, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2666.26,"endTime":2668.9,"body":"would hope church, you know, I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2668.9,"endTime":2673.4,"body":"would really hope church. And,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2668.9,"endTime":2673.4,"body":"you know, even in our liturgies,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2673.7,"endTime":2677.66,"body":"it's designed to do that right,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2673.7,"endTime":2677.66,"body":"to show us Christ, to give us"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2677.66,"endTime":2682.3,"body":"Christ, and the, you know, means"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2677.66,"endTime":2682.3,"body":"of grace in his preached word"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2682.3,"endTime":2686.44,"body":"and in the sacraments, that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2682.3,"endTime":2686.44,"body":"something I really valued from"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2686.44,"endTime":2692.56,"body":"my other denomination. But now I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2686.44,"endTime":2692.56,"body":"see as well that he's not just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2692.56,"endTime":2696.52,"body":"contained in these sacraments."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2692.56,"endTime":2696.52,"body":"He's walking on the street right"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2696.52,"endTime":2701.7,"body":"next to me, you know, my my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2696.52,"endTime":2701.7,"body":"neighbor and my neighbor. So I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2701.7,"endTime":2707.82,"body":"think is in that loving others"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2701.7,"endTime":2707.82,"body":"that we're called to do. It's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2707.82,"endTime":2714.72,"body":"hard, you know, and so looking"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2707.82,"endTime":2714.72,"body":"for Christ is really helpful,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2714.9,"endTime":2721.1,"body":"but it is also the blessing. So"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2714.9,"endTime":2721.1,"body":"I in our relationships, in our"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2721.1,"endTime":2725.78,"body":"encounters during the day, to be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2721.1,"endTime":2725.78,"body":"awakened, to see Christ at work,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2725.9,"endTime":2730.22,"body":"and then such a huge thing to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2725.9,"endTime":2730.22,"body":"help me in healing and growing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2730.64,"endTime":2737.18,"body":"is beauty. You know, it's all"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2730.64,"endTime":2737.18,"body":"around us. It's so powerful. And"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2737.9,"endTime":2742.12,"body":"you know, some others and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2737.9,"endTime":2742.12,"body":"philosophers talk about beauty"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2742.12,"endTime":2746.32,"body":"is actually an invitation to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2742.12,"endTime":2746.32,"body":"walk in goodness, to walk in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2746.32,"endTime":2751.42,"body":"truth, you know, and to see"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2746.32,"endTime":2751.42,"body":"beauty in that way. I definitely"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2751.42,"endTime":2754.78,"body":"see God in that you not just as"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2751.42,"endTime":2754.78,"body":"the creator you know, which is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2754.78,"endTime":2760.2400000000002,"body":"wonderful, but as a beckoner,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2754.78,"endTime":2760.2400000000002,"body":"you know. And sometimes beauty"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2760.2400000000002,"endTime":2763.86,"body":"is. As simple as me being out on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2760.2400000000002,"endTime":2763.86,"body":"my front stoop and, you know,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2763.86,"endTime":2767.88,"body":"seeing some animal, like, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2763.86,"endTime":2767.88,"body":"know, funny bird thing or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2768.06,"endTime":2772.56,"body":"squirrel or, you know, beautiful"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2768.06,"endTime":2772.56,"body":"sunset. But other times it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2772.56,"endTime":2777.0,"body":"beauty and moving out of my"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2772.56,"endTime":2777.0,"body":"comfort zone and and sitting"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2777.0,"endTime":2781.34,"body":"next to somebody suffering, you"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2777.0,"endTime":2781.34,"body":"know, and finding beauty"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2781.88,"endTime":2787.1,"body":"happening in that, in the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2781.88,"endTime":2787.1,"body":"witness, you know. I think with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2787.1,"endTime":2791.72,"body":"this is holiness, you know. So"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2787.1,"endTime":2791.72,"body":"to really look at, okay, it's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2791.72,"endTime":2795.2,"body":"not just the bread and the wine"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2791.72,"endTime":2795.2,"body":"that's been blessed on Sunday"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2795.2,"endTime":2799.04,"body":"morning. That's holy, you know."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2795.2,"endTime":2799.04,"body":"But it's this encounter with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2799.04,"endTime":2803.44,"body":"this person right now, or this"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2799.04,"endTime":2803.44,"body":"encounter with nature right now,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2803.5,"endTime":2807.64,"body":"like God isn't just contained in"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2803.5,"endTime":2807.64,"body":"those other things. Well,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2807.64,"endTime":2809.44,"body":"thank you for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2807.64,"endTime":2809.44,"body":"encountering me in this holy"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2809.44,"endTime":2813.28,"body":"space, and this is a holy"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2809.44,"endTime":2813.28,"body":"encounter, and so I appreciate"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2813.28,"endTime":2817.0,"body":"that. What would you have hopes"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2813.28,"endTime":2817.0,"body":"for for your readers that would"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2817.0,"endTime":2819.58,"body":"pick up your book? Saving Face?"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2817.0,"endTime":2819.58,"body":"I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2819.58,"endTime":2821.46,"body":"would love for"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2819.58,"endTime":2821.46,"body":"people to do book clubs with it,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2821.46,"endTime":2825.42,"body":"because I just feel like it's a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2821.46,"endTime":2825.42,"body":"stimulator of conversation. I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2825.42,"endTime":2828.6,"body":"feel like it can be such a good"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2825.42,"endTime":2828.6,"body":"tool to get people to start"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2828.6,"endTime":2832.2,"body":"journaling, to get people to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2828.6,"endTime":2832.2,"body":"start thinking about their own"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2832.2,"endTime":2836.16,"body":"memories and why they're"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2832.2,"endTime":2836.16,"body":"significant in their life, and"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2836.16,"endTime":2839.04,"body":"how, you know, help them become"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2836.16,"endTime":2839.04,"body":"the type of person they are, or"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2839.04,"endTime":2843.62,"body":"to want to be able to talk with"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2839.04,"endTime":2843.62,"body":"others in a safe place about,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2844.22,"endTime":2848.9,"body":"oh, you know, I'm starting to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2844.22,"endTime":2848.9,"body":"see too, like this persona"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2848.96,"endTime":2853.76,"body":"versus what's down deep in me."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2848.96,"endTime":2853.76,"body":"And I want to be some of that"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2853.76,"endTime":2860.12,"body":"out, you know. So I hope that it"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2853.76,"endTime":2860.12,"body":"can really promote also just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2861.32,"endTime":2864.34,"body":"reaching out of our own little"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2861.32,"endTime":2864.34,"body":"bubbles of whatever"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2864.76,"endTime":2869.86,"body":"denominations we're in, even,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2864.76,"endTime":2869.86,"body":"even how it's so connected to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2869.86,"endTime":2874.84,"body":"politics now, but to to reach"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2869.86,"endTime":2874.84,"body":"out of our little bubbles and to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2874.84,"endTime":2878.32,"body":"see the goodness that's around"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2874.84,"endTime":2878.32,"body":"us as well, and to be able to"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2878.32,"endTime":2879.88,"body":"communicate better in that way."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2880.54,"endTime":2883.8,"body":"And people will"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2880.54,"endTime":2883.8,"body":"love the cover of the book. I"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2883.8,"endTime":2887.16,"body":"love the cover. It's so good."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2883.8,"endTime":2887.16,"body":"It's so good. Wayne"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2887.16,"endTime":2889.68,"body":"brzezinka, we hired"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2887.16,"endTime":2889.68,"body":"an artist out of Tennessee. He's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2889.68,"endTime":2894.06,"body":"amazing. It was actually three"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2889.68,"endTime":2894.06,"body":"dimensional. What he made? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2894.18,"endTime":2896.58,"body":"he's a cool guy, man, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2894.18,"endTime":2896.58,"body":"that's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2896.58,"endTime":2900.54,"body":"amazing. Uh huh,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2896.58,"endTime":2900.54,"body":"yeah, if Yeah, can people get"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2900.54,"endTime":2903.02,"body":"that too? Can they get a print"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2900.54,"endTime":2903.02,"body":"of that cover?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2903.08,"endTime":2906.8,"body":"Oh yeah. Wayne"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2903.08,"endTime":2906.8,"body":"brzezinka Art maybe.com or just"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2906.8,"endTime":2910.04,"body":"waynebrazyka.com and he's got"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2906.8,"endTime":2910.04,"body":"some really amazing work on"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2910.04,"endTime":2910.7,"body":"there to look"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2910.7,"endTime":2914.18,"body":"at, awesome"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2910.7,"endTime":2914.18,"body":"that's good. Any recommendations"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2914.18,"endTime":2916.4,"body":"for us, anything you've been"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2914.18,"endTime":2916.4,"body":"reading or watching lately you"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2916.4,"endTime":2917.54,"body":"could recommend, of course."},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2917.6,"endTime":2920.48,"body":"Well, I mean, I've"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2917.6,"endTime":2920.48,"body":"just been really digging deeper"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2920.48,"endTime":2923.98,"body":"into the mystics, like I would"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2920.48,"endTime":2923.98,"body":"love for people to read Teresa"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2923.98,"endTime":2928.0,"body":"of Avila, like that would be"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2923.98,"endTime":2928.0,"body":"really helpful, I think, but"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2928.0,"endTime":2931.9,"body":"also a book that I another"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2928.0,"endTime":2931.9,"body":"foundational book for writing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2931.9,"endTime":2935.32,"body":"this one was CS Lewis's novel,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2931.9,"endTime":2935.32,"body":"till we have faces and the"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2935.32,"endTime":2937.96,"body":"encounter there at the end of"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2935.32,"endTime":2937.96,"body":"the book, but the whole novel is"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2937.96,"endTime":2941.4,"body":"so good, so it would be a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2937.96,"endTime":2941.4,"body":"really, I think you're better"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2941.4,"endTime":2944.58,"body":"than a companion to reading"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2941.4,"endTime":2944.58,"body":"saving face, it's really what"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2944.58,"endTime":2947.64,"body":"provoked me. So, yeah, there's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2944.58,"endTime":2947.64,"body":"two things"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2948.18,"endTime":2951.06,"body":"nice so, so go"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2948.18,"endTime":2951.06,"body":"get saving face. It's a"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2951.06,"endTime":2956.82,"body":"fantastic read. I really love I"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2951.06,"endTime":2956.82,"body":"mean, as you have always, I love"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2956.82,"endTime":2960.36,"body":"your writing, and love the way"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2956.82,"endTime":2960.36,"body":"that you write, especially in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2960.36,"endTime":2964.52,"body":"this book that the journal"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2960.36,"endTime":2964.52,"body":"entries and just the way that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2964.58,"endTime":2968.96,"body":"you've put things in there, it"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2964.58,"endTime":2968.96,"body":"just feels very It feels like"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2968.96,"endTime":2972.5,"body":"we're encountering your face in"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2968.96,"endTime":2972.5,"body":"the midst of this book, which is"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2972.98,"endTime":2977.0,"body":"is wonderful. It helps us open"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2972.98,"endTime":2977.0,"body":"up and free ourselves to know"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2977.0,"endTime":2979.58,"body":"that we could be a little bit"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2977.0,"endTime":2979.58,"body":"more vulnerable, that we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2979.58,"endTime":2983.56,"body":"say, Hey, we've actually put on"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2979.58,"endTime":2983.56,"body":"faces that are not our own, that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2983.56,"endTime":2986.5,"body":"we need to figure out how to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2983.56,"endTime":2986.5,"body":"take those off. And it's a"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2986.8,"endTime":2990.52,"body":"wonderful, wonderful book that I"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2986.8,"endTime":2990.52,"body":"hope a lot of people get. How"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2990.52,"endTime":2993.82,"body":"can people get it? And is there"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2990.52,"endTime":2993.82,"body":"anywhere else you'd like to"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":2993.82,"endTime":2994.48,"body":"point people to?"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2994.66,"endTime":2997.18,"body":"Yeah, well, I mean,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2994.66,"endTime":2997.18,"body":"I have a landing page for it,"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2997.18,"endTime":3001.82,"body":"saving facebook.com, you can go"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":2997.18,"endTime":3001.82,"body":"on Amazon, you can go on Barnes"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3001.82,"endTime":3004.88,"body":"and Noble, but there's, I think"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3001.82,"endTime":3004.88,"body":"all the links are on there. If"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3004.88,"endTime":3008.54,"body":"you do pre order it before April"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3004.88,"endTime":3008.54,"body":"8, you can be a part. You get"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3008.54,"endTime":3011.96,"body":"some different bonuses. But one"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3008.54,"endTime":3011.96,"body":"of them that I'm excited about"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3011.96,"endTime":3015.62,"body":"is you get to be a part of a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3011.96,"endTime":3015.62,"body":"book club on my sub stack, which"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3015.8,"endTime":3019.58,"body":"is bird in your box at sub"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3015.8,"endTime":3019.58,"body":"stack.com but I think that's"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3019.58,"endTime":3021.98,"body":"going to be a lot of fun. I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3019.58,"endTime":3021.98,"body":"think it's going to bring people"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3021.98,"endTime":3024.4,"body":"together and get them talking"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3021.98,"endTime":3024.4,"body":"like the way it's the way, ways"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3024.4,"endTime":3026.86,"body":"that I'm hoping that people will"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3024.4,"endTime":3026.86,"body":"when they read the book. So"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3026.92,"endTime":3027.52,"body":"nice."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3027.7,"endTime":3030.28,"body":"That's good."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3027.7,"endTime":3030.28,"body":"Well, I subscribed to your sub"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3030.28,"endTime":3032.98,"body":"stack, and so I think other"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3030.28,"endTime":3032.98,"body":"people should do that as well."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3033.1,"endTime":3036.04,"body":"Amy, thank you for this"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3033.1,"endTime":3036.04,"body":"conversation. Thank You that we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3036.04,"endTime":3038.38,"body":"could figure out how we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3036.04,"endTime":3038.38,"body":"actually encounter the face of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3038.38,"endTime":3041.88,"body":"Jesus, so that we can figure out"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3038.38,"endTime":3041.88,"body":"who we truly are, that we could"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3041.94,"endTime":3046.14,"body":"become people that reflect his"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3041.94,"endTime":3046.14,"body":"face, that then we could see the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3046.14,"endTime":3048.6,"body":"goodness in other people's"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3046.14,"endTime":3048.6,"body":"faces, that we could know that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3048.6,"endTime":3051.66,"body":"they are made in the image of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3048.6,"endTime":3051.66,"body":"God, that there's belovedness"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3051.66,"endTime":3055.32,"body":"within them as well, and the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3051.66,"endTime":3055.32,"body":"graciousness and goodness of of"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3055.32,"endTime":3060.3,"body":"Jesus, even when they're our"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3055.32,"endTime":3060.3,"body":"enemy and it's difficult for us,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3060.48,"endTime":3063.68,"body":"and thank. For, for diving into"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3060.48,"endTime":3063.68,"body":"like practices, like journaling,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3063.68,"endTime":3068.18,"body":"and how that has helped heal our"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3063.68,"endTime":3068.18,"body":"yourself. And then it could help"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3068.2400000000002,"endTime":3072.14,"body":"heal us as we walk through the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3068.2400000000002,"endTime":3072.14,"body":"places where man, these are the"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3072.14,"endTime":3075.98,"body":"places we need healing. And we"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3072.14,"endTime":3075.98,"body":"could have some, some prayer"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3075.98,"endTime":3078.92,"body":"time, listening to God in that"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3075.98,"endTime":3078.92,"body":"space, and we figure out, hey,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3078.92,"endTime":3082.3,"body":"how do I heal? And where do I go"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3078.92,"endTime":3082.3,"body":"from here you were on a year"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3082.3,"endTime":3088.18,"body":"ago, and something has has"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3082.3,"endTime":3088.18,"body":"shifted in you from a year ago"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3088.2400000000002,"endTime":3093.58,"body":"that has given you there's a"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3088.2400000000002,"endTime":3093.58,"body":"little there's a little more"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3093.58,"endTime":3099.04,"body":"softness and love in you than"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3093.58,"endTime":3099.04,"body":"before, which it was there"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3099.04,"endTime":3103.86,"body":"before, but I've seen, I don't"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3099.04,"endTime":3103.86,"body":"know, maybe you have encountered"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3103.86,"endTime":3106.7400000000002,"body":"the face of Jesus in deep, deep"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3103.86,"endTime":3106.7400000000002,"body":"ways, a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3106.7400000000002,"endTime":3110.28,"body":"little bit. Thank"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3106.7400000000002,"endTime":3110.28,"body":"you. I appreciate you noticing"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3110.28,"endTime":3114.12,"body":"and telling me that, because I"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3110.28,"endTime":3114.12,"body":"sure you know, can't measure"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3114.12,"endTime":3117.96,"body":"those things. Yeah, it's quite a"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3114.12,"endTime":3117.96,"body":"compliment to hear that. Thank"},{"speaker":"Aimee Byrd","startTime":3117.96,"endTime":3118.7400000000002,"body":"you. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3118.86,"endTime":3120.78,"body":"well, thanks for"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3118.86,"endTime":3120.78,"body":"this conversation. That's great."},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3120.78,"endTime":3122.9,"body":"All right, hopefully we'll talk"},{"speaker":"Joshua Johnson","startTime":3120.78,"endTime":3122.9,"body":"again. Yes, you."}]}