Who Really Benefits When Power Gets Sexual

Your best friend sleeps with your boyfriend, the hookup happens at work, and somehow there’s a video floating around online. Then she gets promoted. That’s the letter Jennifer sends me, and it hits a nerve because it’s not just about cheating, it’s about humiliation, workplace power, and what people will do when careers and desire get mixed together.

I talk through the revenge impulse and why it can feel satisfying for five minutes but haunt you for months. When a workplace affair turns into favoritism or fast tracked promotions, it creates a toxic culture where hardworking people feel invisible. We also get into the uncomfortable reality of how power dynamics and workplace harassment can show up in subtle ways, and why “using what you got” often ends with somebody getting burned.

I also own my part of the conversation by sharing my own history: I cheated years ago, I wasn’t proud of it, and karma collected. That honesty is the backdrop for the real takeaway I want you to sit with: protect your future more than you chase payback. Keep your head, keep your boundaries, and keep your focus on the next door that opens.

If this story made you feel anything, listen all the way through, then subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review. What would you do if you had the video, keep quiet or speak up?

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Transcript

Opening Groove And Mindset

SPEAKER_00 4:05

Yes, yes, yes. How are we doing out there, y'all? Y'all doing good? We're gonna get this thing started just a second here. That y'all do a little groove in this. On this lovely, beautiful, fun day. I'm having a good day. You know, it's uh been a good week. Uh, you know, just getting back in the swing of things, you know, just uh stand up on my shit, stand up on my grind, stand up on my hustle. But it's a good day, you know. I hope you guys are doing well. Hope everything is going the way you hoped it would go. But as for me, you know, I'm just out here grinding, you know, working both my jobs, you know, trying to keep this this thing afloat. Because we all know that this world is just crazy, you know. It's definitely not going the way I thought it was gonna be going, but hey, it's what it is, it's what it is. We gotta learn to deal with it and move on. You know, we can it can be a good day or it can be a bad day, just depending on your situation. In order for me, every day is always a good day, so it's what it is. In any event, we have a letter from a young lady who is uh didn't know really what quite to think of this one, but you know, whatever. Seemed kind of short to me, but in any event, we're gonna get right into it and we're going to talk about it.

Jennifer’s Letter: Betrayal At Work

SPEAKER_00 6:10

So, for those of you who don't know me, my name is the icon. The show is called Let's Talk About It, and we're gonna get right into it. So, without further ado, this letter is entitled Women Have Got to Do Better. Hello, Icon. I wanted to reach out to the women that follow or listen to your show because I have some things on my mind that I don't understand why we as women do what we do or use what we got to get what we want, because that doesn't seem to work in our favor. With that being said, my name is Jennifer. I'm 27 years old and I work in a retailer in Utah. I was currently dating a guy that I worked with only to find out that he's been seeing a co-worker, which is also my best friend. But here's the crazy thing. They don't know that I know that they've been secretly seeing each other because another co-worker of mine caught them in the bathroom and filmed them having sex. Not sure how that works, but whatever. Uh but the video is being circulated online on a sex app or website, but you can't see their faces. I think I know where you're going with this, yeah. Oh. But I know the shoes that he was wearing because I bought them for him. And it's crazy because this asshole told me that he was gonna be working some serious hours talking like he's taking like he's taking a lot of responsibility, yeah. Yeah, he doesn't know about the sex video at work, workplace, but I think someone is blackmailing him. Let's hope not. And I don't care because he deserves everything that he's getting. But this is why I have to say that we as women have to do better. No sooner than she screwed my boyfriend at the time, she got promoted to assistant manager. Well, that was fast track. And though she told me I never wait, and though she told me I never said how she got promotion, because the crazy thing is I applied for the assistant manager position but didn't get it, because they had said that Scott, my boyfriend, and that is now my ex recommended Stacy because she is a goal getter and her work ethic are her work ethics are in line with the company wants and needs. I bet you they are. Yeah, I bet you they are in line. Of course I was mad, but I didn't decide to take my revenge just yet, so I figured every dog has his day, even the tramp will get it as well. So I'm carefully plotting my revenge because I deserve to be manager, and for him to do that to me is just not fair. I feel that I should do something about it. So I received the whole video of the uncut version, damn there's an uncut version of the workplace sex that only lasted every bit of a minute and a half. Damn, you call that? Okay, whatever. So I come, before I come in hot with this evidence, I just want to ask, I just want to ask why men like this are and why do women think that they feel that they can get away that they can get their way to the top, or why do they why do they think that using what they got to get what they want, because honestly, it's a dick move, no pun intended. I also want to clarify that we work at the same place but work two different shifts. I work days, he works nights. But recently, he was moved overnights due to management issues, and the restroom that he was using isn't supposed to be used at night only in special cases. Yeah, I guess it was a special case in this case. But I've been with this company for two years, haven't missed a day or a beat for that matter. But am I doing something wrong? Because I don't understand why would someone why would you want someone who tried who doesn't even know the job? And I'm not throwing shade on my soon-to-beat ex, but damn, how in the hell does this happen? I mean clearly, she doesn't have what I have because she made manager wait, because she made manager, she is nothing more than eye candy to the other male dogs of management to look at. At least I wanted to fight for the people that I work with because I felt that there should be some changes that I know that won't happen because of her, and now I'm just pissed off. So I wanted to know what would you do in my situation? Being hurt by someone wait, being hurt by the one you love hurts, but being hurt by your own best friend is even worse. And she didn't sign it, but she I know she's pissed off.

Revenge, Promotion, And The Tape

SPEAKER_00 10:43

So Miss Jennifer, Jennifer, you are in what I call a long list of line of woman scorned. Um and I don't mean that term very lightly. I think Jennifer that you are really pissed off about this promotion, but and I think you're I mean you have every right to be pissed off and angry, but it seems like uh Scott, which is your boyfriend, your ass soon-to be ex-boyfriend, kind of did you a favor. I mean, I'm not I can I can only guess what retail you work for, but I don't really know. Um I've never been to the state of Utah, but I understand that you're mad. Um I understand you want revenge, but you said there's a somebody sent you the sex the sex tape that it lasted every bit of a minute. Wow. Talk about minute, man. Jeez, come. I don't know where you're gonna go from here, but I would say revenge is not the way to go. Karma shows no mercy. The pain that you give someone else, the lies, betrays, and disrespect always returns home harder and louder. So let that sink in for a minute. I know you're upset because you didn't get this remote because you were passed over by your best friend. By the way, um the crazy thing is I don't even know, because I don't even think you say it here that if you're co-workers if they know each other. I'm trying to find that. Give me just a second. Um, so clearly they may know each other through you. I mean, if you guys all work at the same company and you guys are working split shift, he's working uh you work days, he works evenings, and you said he was putting in work or he's been taking a lot of responsibility. I bet you he has been taking a lot of responsibility. A lot of responsibility on keeping your best friend um well informed and well happy. But here's the thing when you say women have got to do better, I think women are already doing better because women in this day and age, and like I said, in some messages, that some use what they got to get what they want.

My Confession: Cheating With A Coworker

SPEAKER_00 13:26

Now, I I want to tell you my own personal experience because I used to do that. Um but not how can I put this delicately. When I was working at Wally World, I took a shine to this cashier, and she was just the beautiful thing I've ever seen. Um and at night we would do cash pickups. We would do, we would take the cart around, we would go down to different departments, and we'd pick up um the money from the um outlying registers and then transfer them up to the cash office. But I always had to have like an employee with me, not another manager or an employee with me. But I took this young lady and oh my god, she was like, oh boy. I'm trying to stay on track here. Let me stay on track. She was so beautiful, she was blonde hair, blue eyes, oh my god, every bit of things only weigh like maybe a buck oh five. And this was back when, this is way back when, and yes, I did cheat on my wife. So I'm not afraid to admit that, because I'm only human, but I understand where Miss Jennifer's coming from because even though this young lady wasn't um trying to seduce me, and I wasn't trying to seduce her, and I can honestly say that and it's gonna be a bullshit thing to say, but shit happens, but shit did happen. So I kept taking her around every night uh that I worked, and she would always just be with me, and then eventually we just end up sleeping together. And my wife did know, I did she well, she did find out about it. Um I'm not sure how she found out about it, but she was pissed off, as was every woman should be. So I'm not totally blameless in this, and I'm not totally not I get what Jennifer's trying to say, that some women use what they got to get what they want. But and I'm not making no excuses for your ex or whatever. I think for me, the young woman that I was escorting around the store, she was just attracted to the whole management, the whole idea that I was a manager. And I guess some women get off on men being in power. I mean, I was the head um I was a head customer service manager, and that basically meant that I was over the front end of all cashiers, I overseed customer service, overseed scheduling, and let's just say that's and I've had more responsibility. So and what I did was completely wrong. So I'm not justifying what your ex did, but what I did was completely wrong. Because not only did it overlap in my judgment, but uh my marriage also often also suffered for it. And the other crazy thing is that the dude that she was seeing, she left this guy, I left my wife, and we moved in together. Well, that was an explosion just waiting to happen because it only lasted every bit of two months. Two months. So while your best friend is climbing up the pole, and not literally, figuratively speaking, Jesus, I gotta choose my words more carefully. But while she's trying to climb up the pole, I'm not sure, but you say her worth ethics are not, you know, if you've seen her work, you don't think she's a good fit for the job. Well, and that's and that's fine. But here's the thing: I understand you're upset about this, but you got to either say you're going to do something different, either you're gonna stay in the same position because it seems like this door is closing, but when that door closes, another one eventually will open, and you're not with your ex anymore. I'm not sure how you feel about your best friend, because clearly, and I can honestly say that it doesn't last, it doesn't last. I think that for me, I felt so good about doing what I was doing. I was like, Oh, yeah, I'm gonna leave my wife and we're gonna be together. Well, that shit didn't even happen, you know. It turns out I was the one that got left, and when we moved in together, the chick took the rent money, forcing not an eviction, but I had to leave because I was paying rent uh to my wife, and then also paying rent with my mistress. I can't say girlfriend because I was married, so you know, and like you say, every dog has his day, and karma did come back for me, and I felt bad, I felt low, and I just felt really horrible about it because it doesn't matter if you think you can get away with it, it's always gonna come back to get you, it's always gonna come back to bite you in the ass, it's always gonna come back to haunt you. So while I think that your ex Scott was kind of doing this, trying to push this girl through, is because I don't know the kind of relationship that they have, but when you're working at Wally World, it's unit's unfounded that you can be in a relationship with a co-worker of the same department. You can date them outside a department, and this is what I didn't know that Walmart has like different departments. They have a front end, they have a grocery, they have a uh dairy, they have a deli, they have a clothing line, they have a houseware and TLE. I didn't even know none of that shit even existed until I started working at Wally World. I didn't. I thought Wally World was just even though it's one big entity, but there's departments, and I understood that. Um and I understood that. But my thing was and I think when we do this, we're on this high, like, oh my god, this is gonna last, and this is gonna be the best thing ever. Because when I left my wife, um, she did have two of my kids, but I never stopped loving my kids. I think that's that at that time, just me and my wife were we weren't really having any issues. I just wanted to basically just be a dickhole and asshole man and be a dog. I mean, I can admit that. Because I'm not afraid to admit that because I'm human and I'm flawed. So what I did to my wife was completely wrong, and I can admit that. I mean, I'm not sure how many males can say that they have done this shit and actually apologize for it and admit that it was wrong, because no, men want to justify that what we do, we want justification behind it. So say that so it's trying to make it seem like we're the ones that are right and that your girlfriend or your wife is wrong, and that's not never the case because we're the ones who initiated it, even though I knew I was married, I decided I wanted to do it. In this case, um, if your best friend is the new assistant manager, and you're still low-key, not the assistant manager, but you got your ducks in a row, let it go, let it be. Because here's gonna happen she's gonna eventually either get tired of him or working with him or working because I don't know, I don't really know enough about this young lady to say, well, this is what's gonna happen, but I'm gonna give it my shot. I'm gonna I'm gonna give it a try. I think what's gonna happen is that either they may end up being together or they may not end up being together because they work in. I'm not even sure if they're gonna be kept on the same ship if he works overnight. Well, hold on, you didn't say she's an assistant manager, but that could be an overnight position. I'm not sure. Kind of wish I had a little bit more in the slider, but I'm gonna try to do the best that I can with what I got. So

Blackmail Fears And Bathroom Video Fallout

SPEAKER_00 21:28

um the sex video, which is just diabolical, I'm not even sure how the how the hell that even came about or how that would even happen, but I guess I could see that happening because if you're in the passion of the moment and then somebody's videotaped, clearly they didn't know nobody was in the damn bathroom. What bathroom do y'all not have that you can't use at nighttime that somebody was in? I mean, I'm not sure where the hell you were working at. It's a re the only person I could think. Of would be a retailer, would be Walmart because I know Walmart likes to close off some of their bathrooms at nighttime, and then they don't allow like certain people in there. My crazy fast thing is what co-worker of yours is scheming, or if they're trying to blackmail your ex into doing because let's just say I don't know where this guy works at, but clearly blackmailing is not gonna be in this in his favor because well, maybe it is, maybe it is. I don't know. He clearly I don't have any kids, and I guess it's just relationship. Now, I don't I just don't understand how you could get the video. Well, maybe I can hold on. Let me picture this. Picture this for a minute. Come with me, come with me on this journey. So you're in a bathroom, in walks the young lady, then the male walks in. Did the bathroom have a lock on what couldn't have? How the hell did you even get this off? I'm just trying to think about this shit. This is crazy. I'm not gonna spend too much time on it, but damn, I'm trying to figure out how this even worked. Did you you gotta be short or you were in the next all over and they didn't maybe didn't know that anyone was in there? They decided, well, let's go ahead and get this on. But you said it lasts every bit of a minute. I mean, talk about your mini-man because your minimum didn't even put the work in. He was only in there for a minute and then he dipped. I mean, clearly. Clearly, this can't be this can't be the chick. Your best friend. I mean, I get why you say women gotta do better. Maybe your friend is just trying to angle for a better position in the company, but that's clearly not the way to get it. Um now if he put help pushed her through, then I guarantee it's going to backfire on him. Because I've seen this before. I've seen that when you have somebody that is unqualified for the position, they get pushed through, well, then it kind of backsfire. Because then if she's eye candy for the company, like the other male managers, I don't really think so. Um, because not everybody's on that same path of what your ex is going to be on. Now, what I'm thinking is that he fast-tracked her through because either she's blackmailing him, but I don't understand what job that you can have in retail that this would be the go-to thing to blackmail somebody. I can't see it. I'm sorry, I just can't see it. I can't. I don't I'm just not seeing it. I mean, maybe some of you guys can see it, maybe I just can't see it because I'm thinking that this retailer, well, it could be other retailers, but I don't know. I'm not just gonna I'm just gonna leave it at Walmart for my own for my own absolute because that's what happened to me, but I didn't get caught screwing no girl in the bathroom. No, we was actually out um out somewhere. I'm not sure where we was at. But you know, enough about me, not about me. Let's stick to the story at hand because I'm trying to get to this. So, and you said you've seen the video, and you said you know it's his shoes because it's the shoes that you bought him. Well, if that isn't diabolical enough, I'm not sure what it is. I'm not sure what you plan to do with this kind of revenge or this kind of the fact that somebody videotaped it and then you watched it, which is just even more diabolical, because I don't know if that was me, I probably would have gone on ahead and snitched him out and been like, so this is what your co-workers do with their time. Yes, this is a video of my ex having sex with a co-worker in a bathroom. Yeah, I mean, would you would have got a position? I'm not sure, but still, you can't be screwing around on company time. Come on now, people. I mean, as much as that thrilling, this as much as that thrilling and exciting, I've never done nothing like that. Never ever in my life. Well, hold on, hold on, hold on. Well, there was this one time. No, I'm just joking. I'm just joking, I ain't never done nothing like that. Um, I've done some crazy shit in my day, but never nothing like this. I mean, not to where somebody's actually gonna be videotaping you and either you got the I mean, I wish I could have seen that video though. Anyways, if it's on if it's trending on a sexual site, which I don't know what site that is because she didn't really tell me, but hey, whatever. In any event, Jennifer, I think the revenge that you're seeking, I think you just let this ride out because, like you said, every dog has his day. As far as a trap, I'm not sure. I only know the saying of every dog has his day. Now, people who create their own drama deserve their own karma. So, in this case, your ex has created this whole thing, and now he's with your did she even say her name? I think she did say her name. Oh, Stacy. Okay, so it's Scott and Stacy. Okay, got it. Um the fact that he pushed her through as an assistant manager is just crazy because that's just saying that I just don't think it's gonna last. I think it's gonna be more trouble than what this is worth because I don't really know if she has this guy by the balls, so to speak. But if she's trying to climb the corporate ladder, this damn sure ain't the way to get it done. And I understand now but what you're saying that women gotta do better. Now, this doesn't go for all women. Now, and this doesn't pertain, but she wants to keep it on women, so we'll keep it focused on women because I've experienced this too. But um, oh man, my goodness. There's a young lady that I used to work with, and I thought she was so beautiful. We never never fooled around, never known. I just thought she was just a beautiful young lady, and for her to um, she would come in, she would come to work, and she was just so beautiful. She had this this brown caramel skin, this long black silky hair. Oh my god, she was every bit of like four foot nine, maybe a little bit taller, but she was just so beautiful, and the store manager had this friend, and I guess that he had heard that she kind of turned a few tricks back in her day or whatever, I'm not sure. But she pretty much do anybody that she wanted. But anyways, a guy came to the store, they went to the back, and I was like, dude, are you serious? He's like, What? You're not gonna say anything. I was like, say my store doesn't say anything, it's your store, but you got her back here doing one of your homies? I mean, that's just what what what's the what's the point? What what is she gonna get for this? And the guy came out, I mean, just like he laid it, he was just like over cloud nine. He's like, Yeah, thanks for that, you know. I'll hit you back up. And the crazy thing is the chick had a whole boyfriend. He was in another state, but the next state over, but still. Now I have no right judging what this young lady did, because I have done that, but I've never done this in my home or a place where I work. I've always been outside my home or outside the place that I've worked. Now, I know cheating is cheating, and there's no justification for it, but still, have some kind of decorum because you know, when let's just say this video does leak, and I'm not sure if you can see the girl's face, but just their face were blurred out. You didn't even mention if there was any moaning or any, oh yeah, yeah, girl, you know, you're gonna take this pipe, I'm gonna give it to you to write. I don't know, just some sex talk. I don't know, I don't know. But I think women, and some women have it worse than others, because I think some women that are just if women are just so beautiful that a male can't control himself around a woman, then you shouldn't be in that position.

Power, Temptation, And Workplace Harassment

SPEAKER_00 30:02

Not talking about the woman, I'm talking about the male. Because women are most of the time not looking for those kind of sexual advances, they just want to come and do their work and go home. And if they're a team player or a good asset, no pun intended, if they're a good asset to the team, let them be an asset to the team. But as for a male, we don't have to go in and just kind of start saying, Well, you know, if you were to, you know, you know, you were to rub my back and I rub yours, things are gonna happen for you in this company. And it shouldn't even be like that. It shouldn't. It should be that if you earn this job, if you have the job and you earn the job, and you earn the position that you're going to electron advances, and then you earn it. I mean, the crazy thing is, I don't know if your um ex is going to have like a lawsuit or if this girl's threatening with a lawsuit or whatever. Um, couldn't she your best friend, so I'm assuming you guys are the same age. I mean, clearly she can't be that young if you guys are best friends, but I think that men should take a step back because let's be honest, I've worked with a lot of beautiful women, and not once have I thought to myself that oh, she needs me. She needs me to be in her. Yeah, we're gonna hit that. Yeah, I'm gonna get that. Because I've seen that before, but that's never my that's not what I do, you know. I mean, I don't even think I can be just that diabolical to look at a woman and be like, yeah, I'm definitely gonna hit that. Yeah, I used to do that in my mind, but that that was just me quietly thinking, but I don't do that anymore. Um, even when I was younger, I didn't really do that. I was just being well who I always is, and that's just a class clown, or somebody likes to joke a lot and like to laugh a lot and do all this other stuff. So what I'm saying is that women are already doing better, it's just the positions that men put them in. Again, no pun intended, damn it, no pun intended. It's just that men often want to try to make women feel like they are like inferior to them, and they want to always try to say that you know, in order for you to get this position, then I'm gonna need you to do some things for me, and I want you to do some things for me, and either you're gonna play ball or you're not gonna play ball, and that shouldn't even be like that, you know. And that's what that's what's the crazy screwed up thing in this society because there's a lot of qualified women in these jobs that deserve the money that they get or the position that they have, and it should be through no fault of a male trying to degrade her or debase her and to say that you know, well, she's good that she's good at this. No, it shouldn't even be like that. I mean, real talk. I don't even know how you're gonna get through this, but I know that you can get through this. So hang on, um, but women, as I keep saying, women, without women, there would be no men. So why do women feel that if they need to go to a job to show a little cleavage to get to try to feel the coming in? There are some women who are like that. Excuse me, there are some women who do that, and that's only like maybe one percent. That's not the other 99%. That's only one percent of women who do that because they're trying to use what they got to get what they want because they want to get so far in their career that they want to have something to show for. And I'm gonna take it back to like the I don't know. Let's just go back with to the meet hashtag MeToo movement. The hashtag me too movement was a big phenomenal movement, and though I thought it opened up a lot of doors for women that are like average women, it didn't. It didn't, it only opened up the doors for the women in Hollywood, but very little women that were experiencing this kind of behavior towards these men didn't get the just didn't get the justification, didn't get the damn it, I lost it, didn't get the justice that they deserved. They didn't. So, um and I don't know why, as men we have to feel the need that we have when we see a woman and she's very beautiful, why we have to go into you know dog mode or a dog in heat mode running around with our with a thing sticking out and our tongue panting and all this other shit. I don't know why we gotta do that. If you're a married man, then your eyes should only be on one woman only. It's okay to look. It's okay to look, but you ain't gotta touch, you ain't gotta make comments about her. Unless your wife asks you a specific question and be like, what do you think? You know, I think that if you're asking for like maybe an outfit, it looks good on you uh versus her. Because I remember me and my wife would go to Frederick's or Hollywood, and there were some models that were there was some stores that they would have these lingerie models that they would actually have the the um the attire on. And my wife would be like, Well, what do you think about this? Like, yeah, I think it would look good because you guys are both kind of the same size, and I didn't mean that in the sexist way. So if you're with your wife and she asks you a question, that's fine. But as far as you know, going to um I'm trying to think of the words here. I'm really drawing a blank right now. Um, it's okay to look. It's okay to look because as a man I look, and I'm pretty sure the women do the same thing, but they don't act on it as much as the men do. I mean, men can say that, oh yeah, she's gonna act on it. No, she doesn't, she doesn't, because women are much more stronger than men when it comes to relationships.

Loyalty Tests And Friendship Boundaries

SPEAKER_00 36:06

I don't give a shit what none of y'all say in the comments. I know y'all gonna email me, like, well, how you gonna say some shit like that when I've been holding it down since day one? That's fine, that's all good. But women are the most strongest and they're the most loyal in a relationship, and I tell you why. Because if a woman, let's say a woman has like a banging friend or a dynamite friend and a best friend, well, she's gonna try to test you with their words, she's gonna try to test with that friend. And I think as we've heard in other recent shows, that you can get tested any given any given time to even get a point. But if you do that to a woman, no, no, no. Most women that I've seen or come across or that I've heard from always kept it a buck, they always kept it a hundred with the guys that they're dating. And that's like it's not a crazy thing. That's they're just they're just wired like that. But men, we're wired to say that if we feel that we've been married for too long and that we feel that we don't have the spark that we used to have when we first met our wife, well, we want to be challenged on that. We want to say that, oh my god, she said hi to me. I think I can go from here and see if I can make this work. No, no, she was just saying hi, how you doing? Yeah. So I'm just saying, you know, I know that a lot of my listeners are gonna be like, well, no, how can you say that because my girl cheated on me with so-and-so and so and so? Yes, I understand that, but I'm saying that women are more loyal because they put up with so much of the male shit that they don't want to be bothered with any more drama. Women are more loyal because they always stand by their man no matter what happens, depending on that situation, they always stand by their man. They do, they do. I'm just saying, but and I'm not saying that there are like there's a lot of men out there that are disloyal because there's a lot of loyal men out there too. But in Jennifer's case, I don't think this was a test. I think that this was something that eventually was going to um that spark kind of ignited, and she didn't even say if he was a bad dude or if he was a horrible dude, but she just said she screwed your best friend, screwed your boyfriend. Now, and I'm not sure where the boy where the best friend goes from here, but clearly if you two knew each other, or if they knew each other, they knew of each other, and that's the thing. I don't understand why that if women, if you know that you're you know if you know if your best friend has a guy and she's invested in y'all, what possibly motive or reason could you have to go sleep with her boyfriend? I don't know. I mean, because clearly he wasn't and I don't know, I'm just gonna throw this out there. Maybe, just maybe, hold on, y'all. Just maybe sometimes when you girls get together and y'all talk about, you know, what your man does for you in the bed, and though your best friend is playing out, like, ah girl, please, my man do this, that and the other, yada yada yada, whoop-de-woo. Well does he though? Does he though? Because what I've also found out is that because my wife used to brag about me. I mean, she would say I was like a stallion in the sack. I mean, she said I oh man, I used to get it in. Not a joke. No, I was just joking. She didn't say that, but you know, when you're with your girlfriends and you know you guys want to talk about what your what your other half does for you in the bed, well they kind of compare notes. And that hasn't really happened to me, even though I did get tested with that, because there was this one girl, oh her name was Marie, and she had this dude that was such an asshole. I mean, he was like the epitome of asshole. He was like lower than shit on a stick or shit on a floor or whatever. But she had asked me, she was like, Well, you know, I talked to your wife and she said that you really know how to take care of a woman. I said, Yeah, I do love my wife. She's like, So what are you thinking about me and you maybe just seeing where this goes? I was like, But you know I'm married. Hell, you're married, and she was like, Well, let's just see where it goes. I was like, Yeah, uh no, no. Because her dude was secretly a closet of racist, and she had one mixed kid uh by a black guy, and then she had two more. Uh the black the black girl was older, and then she had two more by him. So I was like, uh no, I can't, I can't, and I won't. And though, and though I was somewhat struck in, but I kind of thought in my mind, uh, this could be a setup. Because her and my wife were like really good friends. So how do I know my wife wasn't putting me up to the test and saying that, oh yeah, you're gonna take that big girl? Because number one, you white, you're a brunette, and white girls to me is like kryptonite and it's superman. I'm just saying, don't hate me, that's what it is. I was born this way. Oh, not really, but you know, it's just in my blood. I don't know why. I don't know. But for those of you guys who've seen my wife, she's mixed and she's got curly brown, curly, sandy blonde hair. So I was really in love with my wife. But getting back to this, I think that I don't know how you and your best how your best friend came to be doing your dude or whatever. I don't know what that may entail, but I just don't know. And for me, I don't seek revenge, I just want payback. What goes around comes around. Remember that. So I don't think don't put all your energy and effort into trying to ruin your ex or your best friend's um life. Because in the end, Carl will be a bigger, bigger than it ever will need to

Let Karma Work While You Level Up

SPEAKER_00 42:48

be. So I think for you, Miss Jennifer, I think the only thing you can do is just continue to do what you're gonna do, continue to work, and continue to succeed all your expectations, continue to focus on the task at hand. If you want to be management, be management. Now, that doesn't necessarily have to say you have to be management in that company because your skills are gonna take you far. And I know that you were hoping for change, but either it is gonna work out for your best friend or it's not. But in any event, because I know that when we get hurt by someone, we want we want instant karma, we want them to feel our pain, we want them to feel everything that they have done to us. It's kind of reaching back like when somebody used to beat you up or bully you in high school. You want to see that person get what they deserve. You can, but is it gonna make you happy? It may make you happy for the first five or ten minutes to see that person go down the Savage Hill, but I don't know. I'll give you an example. My auntie um dated this guy, and this guy was just he started out good, he was The real gentleman, or so we thought, or she thought, but he was just a player player, you know, he couldn't get enough of the women until one day that when him and my aunt decided to break it off. Well, I think it's either it was either six months to a year later, he tragically passed away. I don't know how, I don't know why. But I'm not sure if that was the kind of revenge because when she heard about that, because that was one of the last things she said to him. She said every dog has his day. And that must be some kind of a saying going around because it's very popular. But when she heard that he had passed away, share her heart just sunk. So while we don't want to wish death or anything that bad happens to them, but know that if somebody's done you wrong, what comes around goes around. Karma will have their day with them. But you don't need to focus all your energy and your efforts into trying to ruin somebody's life. Because when you do that, then that's just gonna send you further and further away from what your objectives are. I mean, you don't want to be that person. I mean, hell. I've been hurt before, and I have done the hurting myself, and karma has come to pay me a visit. So much bad that I've learned some error of my ways, I have done some things I'm not too proud of. But I can share that with you guys because even when my wife was alive, I think we did a show on this and we talked about this. It's one of my earlier shows. But I had to go back and dig it up in the archives, I might repost that. But every relationship is not perfect. What's perfect is that if you and the person continue to be together and work it out, sure there's gonna be bumps and bruises along the way. There's gonna be all kinds of temptation, all kinds of temptation. But it's important thing is that if you are steady on this course and that you are in love with the person that you say you're in love with, be with that person. A strong woman doesn't seek revenge, she moves on and lets karma do her dirty work. Remember that. So I'm just saying, you know, don't focus all your energy on to this particular incident because, and I hope this doesn't happen to you, but there's gonna be hurt along the way. You're only 27 years old, so you have a lot of life to live. You can't go through life thinking that every relationship is gonna be perfect. Now, I'm not saying it's gonna be flawed by cheating, but every relationship has its ups and its downs. And depending on the person that you get with, you can have more ups than you could have downs. And depending on the type of person that you come in contact with, don't take the past and put it in with the future. Don't do that. Don't say, well, he hurt me, so I know you're gonna hurt me because that's what's gonna be an even more stressful relationship for you and your new person, whoever that may be. I don't know. So you have to understand that in today's society, today's world, there's a lot of people doing a lot of payback online and social media, they're getting upset, they're going to as far as trying to kill a person, run a person over with their car, and I'm not with none of that shit. I don't, I don't believe in none of that. I think that you can't make a person stay in love with you. I think that you can't, I mean, unless you're kidnapping them, which I pray that's not going to be the case because that would be even more diabolical, but you can't make anybody stay physically with you or stay physically attached to you. That's just not the way it works. If you find that person and you guys have a good relationship, then keep that going. Keep that going. Because loving people is hard work. I've said this before and I'll say it again. It's very hard work. Excuse me. Loving people is hard work, relationships are hard work, they're 10 times harder than anything I know. I mean, it's like a full-time job loving somebody because you want to make sure that person is happy. I mean, a relationship in a nutshell is like a full-time job because you want to make sure that the customer you're providing service for is happy or your bosses are happy. So it's like a I'm not really gonna say a no-win situation, but it's it's kind of up there. You can you can still win it and you can still be in it, but as long as you keep your mind and heart free of that negative bullshit. So I know that you think it's not fair that you didn't get this promotion, but I think there's going to be other opportunities that's gonna come for you. Like they say, when one door closes, another one opens. A bigger and better and brighter opportunity for you will come. Now, let Mr. Scott and Miss Steaks let them be together. If they're gonna be happy, I was gonna say I was gonna say you can wish them well, but I don't think you're quite there yet. I don't I think you just want payback, and the payback is gonna come when you least expect it. I don't know what form that's gonna be, because how do you know that your friend can move on to the next higher up? I mean, she could really be climbing that corporate pole. Damn it, no pun intended, damn it. Yeah, no I'm trying to say. So, but as a man who did what Scott did, I was not happy about that. Um, because I've done that I think three three times in my work in my work life. Yeah, I did that at McDonald's. That was when I was younger, and then I did that was it at KFC? Ah hell, I don't know. But I've done only done that three times, but the other two times I wasn't married, and I didn't even have my wife, but the third time was with my wife, my late wife. So, but and I get it, you know. I know you want this kind of you want them to feel your pain. They're gonna feel the pain, alright. Because when Karma finds them, and in whatever form that may happen, because you never know what can happen. Just don't kid just don't sit and keep dwelling on this and thinking that, oh my god, I want this to happen today. It's not gonna happen when you want it to. I mean, you never know. This guy could have his career ended by tomorrow because of this leaked sectice, because I'm pretty sure that it's gonna all if it's circling around online, then it's clearly gonna get back to the higher ups, and they can either high-five him and say, Hey, yeah, that's the kind of dedication we want at this job, or they'll be like, No, you're gonna get the hell out of here. We don't do that here, and I'm hoping it's gonna be that second option that we don't do that here. So, you know. Oh, god, I love this fate. But Miss Jennifer, I hope that this podcast finds you well. I hope that everything is going to be okay for you. But I would encourage you to just it sounds like this is gonna be a fresh, but if you're focused and organized on the task at hand, stay focused and organized. Don't let no one, let nobody come between you and what your destiny has for you. Because you are going to be somebody. I mean that's very much what I got. And I know that we all as human beings are flawed in some kind of way, and I know that we as human beings can't sometimes resist the temptation of what comes our way. I don't know if it's as you get older, or if it's just something that you kind of grow up from, or it still stays with you, or if it's just purely ego. In my case, it was neither. My case, I just seen a pretty girl that I thought I had to have, and that she was falling for me and I kind of fell for her. Yes, even though I was married and it was wrong, I didn't see the wrong side of it. I just knew that what I was doing was happy and it was gonna be okay. But it wasn't. It wasn't. Because cheating on somebody, it hurts you, it stings you. You think about it, you can't keep it bottled up because eventually it will get out. And when it gets out, it gets out. It'll show its ugly head, it'll make a mess of things, it will ultimately end the one that you thought that you love, it will cause them more pain than anything. And I know that people say, Well, that's not gonna happen to me. Well, you don't know that. You don't know that. Anything can happen to anybody at any given time. So if you're cheating, you don't think you're gonna get caught, you think you are just this player player, or you think you can get it done, and hey, more power to you, but I'm not encouraging it. So I just tell you, you know, it's what it is. So, Miss Jennifer, as I get ready to close my podcast out, I'm gonna leave you with this.

Final Quotes, Thanks, And Where To Follow

unknown 54:16

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 54:17

Apparently, when you treat people like they treat you, they get upset. The best revenge is when you honestly don't care anymore. That's what I'm gonna leave you with. So, as I get ready to close the show out, I want to say thank you to all my loyal listeners. Thank you for allowing me to grace you with my presence. Thank you for the people that watch me and the people that download and support my show. I just want to say thank you. So, as I get ready to close it out, we're gonna leave you with this last track. It's called Winter Foilage by Just Normal. I'm gonna let y'all glue to this. Till next time, my friends. Y'all take care of yourself and each other. And Miss Jennifer, keep your head up, keep going strong. Tough times don't last forever, but tough people do. Till next time, you guys take care of yourself.

SPEAKER_01 56:17

Please follow me on TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook. Thanks for spending time with me today. Always remember. I can't control life, but I can control how I react to it. Stay sharp, and I'll see you soon.