Peace & Prosperity Podcast
In the Peace & Prosperity Podcast, Jason Phillips, licensed therapist and life coach, shares personal experiences that force you to think deeply about your values, beliefs, and behaviors to ensure you achieve peace, happiness, and success in your life.
Peace & Prosperity Podcast
New Year, New Vision: Create Your Action Steps - Episode # 74
The Peace & Prosperity Podcast is a bi-weekly conversation with Jason Phillips, LCSW, licensed therapist and confidence expert in Raleigh, NC, discussing all things related to self-love and self-confidence, and how we can improve ourselves personally and professionally.
Unlock inner peace and prosperity with Jason as he guides you through overcoming obstacles like fear of failure and unrealistic expectations while crafting a clear vision for personal and professional growth. Jason offers practical strategies for managing high-functioning anxiety, setting specific goals, and cultivating a supportive network to thrive under pressure.
What You'll Learn:
- How to Set Clear Goals
- Overcoming Fear of Failure
- Strategies for Long-Term Success
- Managing High-Functioning Anxiety
- Building a Supportive Network
- Creative Problem-Solving
This is just a SNIPPET of what we covered during this episode!!!
To stay connected with Jason and learn about coaching, connect with Jason on social media:
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jphillipsmsw/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jphillipsmsw
Visit Jason's website for a consultation:
Website -https://www.jasonlphillips.com
If I know, I want to achieve a goal of, let's say, you know, getting married and having kids, right, so I'm a new dad and proud to be a new dad, but that was a journey. So I've been married 10 years, but a father less than one. If I was only thinking in the short term, like it had to happen now, then I would have given up on that goal a long time ago. All right, all right. Welcome to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity Podcast. I'm your host, jason Phillips, licensed therapist, confidence expert, and today we are talking about the importance of having vision. This is one of those topics where we have to revisit, because the language around vision changes and we learn more about ourselves and how to apply these different concepts so that we can have vision for ourselves. Now, before we talk about, like, how to acquire vision and what it looks like, let's talk about some of the things that get in the way of you really having the vision that you want for yourself. The first thing that gets in the way is lack of clarity or lack of focus, but then they bounce around to something else and something else and something else, and they continuously start over. Or their vision or their goal is so broad that they can't ever narrow it down. So if I'm talking to you, you may be thinking like dang Jason. That's kind of where I've been at Right. I know I want something, but I don't know exactly what it is. And that lack of specificity I killed it right there. Right, I know I want something, but I don't know exactly what it is. And that lack of specificity oh, I killed it right there. Right. But that lack of specificity it really does get in the way of you being able to acquire and achieve the goal that you want. For instance, let's say you want to make a certain amount of money or you want to be successful financially. Let's just use numbers, but you don't know what that number is. You don't know truly what that number looks like. So it's going to be hard for you to have that vision, to make it plain, because you're confused or you're not sure about exactly where you want to go. Or you may be in your career you've been in a career for a while but it's like you know what you want more, but you're not exactly sure what more looks like. You're not clear on where you want to go. So this means an opportunity could be right in front of you, but you're not sure what you want, so you can't take it, you can't seize the opportunity. The clearer that you get, the easier it's going to be for you to attain vision and really have a clear path for you.
Speaker 1:Let's also say the second thing is going to be when you are just a little bit too, maybe too overzealous, like you know what you want, but you you're not realistic. Yeah, let's say that you're unrealistic about what it's going to take to achieve this goal or to play out this vision. So then, what this looks like is you become scatterbrained, or you may become frustrated with yourself because of the lack of progress getting in the way of you being able to execute, progress getting in the way of you being able to execute Because, again, you know, you have a concept of it. Like, we've heard that term, I have a concept of what I want, but you don't know exactly what it is, or you're just unrealistic about the work that it's going to take to achieve what you want. Now, let's say we talked about lack of clarity. We also talked about being a little bit too overzealous Another thing that can get in the way, truly, of you having vision or being able to play it out is the fear of failure.
Speaker 1:Now, this is the thing with failure does come risk, or with success comes risk. But if you're so scared that you don't actually take the step, the first step, then you will stay stuck. Now this looks like playing it safe. Think about the area in your life where you know like, yes, I need more here, I want more in this area, I actually deserve more in this area of my life. And you got the vision, but what you don't have is the confidence to go after it, because you tried to go after it before and it didn't work. So now you deem that as a failure and now you can't try it again. It hurt too bad, but you know what that is truly a part of life.
Speaker 1:Turn that failure or that loss, or however you want to frame it, turn it into a lesson. What mistakes did you make? Or maybe it just wasn't your timing? But when you are so afraid to put yourself out there to actually get what you want, you're going to find yourself really lacking clear vision and being able to have that inner peace and prosperity for you. So, like I'm you know if you haven't listened to the podcast. I'm married, been married almost 10 years now.
Speaker 1:So in order for me to date my wife and propose to her and get married all of that there had to be a risk, because she could have said no. Would that have stopped me? Probably so no, I'm joking Like it wouldn't have stopped me, but I would figure out. What do I need to do to get her attention? How can I find out if we're compatible or not? How can I step my game up? Not just taking the man is not going to work out or start beating myself up because it didn't go how I wanted the first time around. That is what you call being afraid of taking that huge risk.
Speaker 1:So don't let fear of failure stop you from being great in the specific area of your life, especially if you know that you want more and you deserve more in that area, even when it comes to your you know, not just your personal romantic life, but when it comes to your career. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there and be rejected. Maybe you're not as good as you think you are. Maybe you need to step up your credentials. Maybe you've been rushing it in certain areas or aspects and really you need to redefine your skill set or figure out a better way to position yourself. All of these things just mean you need either more data or maybe you need to try harder. You need more skills, more education, more credentials, whatever it means. But it does not mean that, because you didn't get what you thought you deserved or you failed in one area, that you just give up. When you do that, that's how you just lose your vision altogether. You don't even try.
Speaker 1:Another thing that will get in the way of you having great vision is you will have what we call short-term thinking. You're only thinking about tomorrow, or you're only thinking about the next day Like it's very well, it's the same thing, right, but you're only thinking about the next day Like it's very well, it's the same thing, right, but you only thinking like this far ahead, you're not thinking long-term. So, for instance, if I know I want to achieve a goal of, let's say, you know, getting married and having kids, right, so I'm a new dad and proud to be a new dad, but that was a journey, so I've been married 10 years, but a father less than one. If I was only thinking in the short term, like it had to happen now, then I would have given up on that goal a long time ago. But I was thinking the future. I was thinking I'm in this for the long haul and I'm going to do, or we're going to do, whatever it takes to achieve what we want in that area. That's where the faith comes into play, but also that's when you put in the work and your behaviors make a big difference too.
Speaker 1:Sometimes we only get stuck in the right now phase, like if I don't have it right now, then maybe it's not in my vision or my vision board is off. That is definitely what we call a black and white thinking. Or again, it's just short term thinking. We got to start thinking long term. Down the field For you, you are the quarterback of your life and sometimes, if you watch football, sometimes they are running it two yards, three yards, five yards, and then they'll throw that thing up out there for like a 50 or 60 yard game. But the quarterback sees like I'm trying to get down the field, despite how long it takes, or despite if I'm passing, running whatever play is being called, think about your life. You may have to call different plays depending on what players you have to work with or what the circumstances are. You're going to call a different play if you're feeling real up in this area in your life, or you're going to, you know, run this different play if you know. Hey, I'm struggling right here, so let me go back to the drawing board, but I'm not going to quit and I'm not going to think that just because I'm not moving the ball down the field right now that I'm not going to get a touchdown. Sometimes we get so caught up on just trying to throw up a Hail Mary, right, you just throw up a wing and a prayer that you can't even be strategic about what you need to do for you. Be the quarterback, be patient and execute, and if you notice this one thing about quarterbacks they're making split second decisions, but they're being calm all at the same time. All right y'all.
Speaker 1:One more thing that gets in the way of us being able to have clear vision and I would say this is probably one of the bigger things too is we lack support and resources. What do I mean by that? That means that the people you have around you or the areas that you spend the most time in they're not conducive to what your vision looks like. They don't see you getting where you want to go. So their behaviors, the language, how they interact with you, it keeps you right where you are, and you, you're a part of that too, right? So don't think you can just point the finger and blame this person, blame your partner, blame your coworkers, blame your boss. No, you're a part of that circle as well. But look at your circle, look at your support system, look at your resources. Am I using them to the best of my ability? Are these the people that are going to help me get down the field, or do I need to get different resources? Do I need to tap in to other things that I know I have access to, or I need to learn more about? These are the things that are going to help you reach that long-term success.
Speaker 1:And I'm telling y'all I think vision is something that we underestimate, we don't give enough credit to, because we think certain things are just supposed to happen. Right, it's not going to take work. I was talking to somebody a couple of weeks ago and I talked to them about like you know, I'm in school right now and they're in school and I said listen, we know it's end of semester, we got papers due, we have reports due, we have exams all of that you have to lock in. You have to tell yourself, no, I can't do X, y or Z until I have this done. And they're like, really, you have to be that strict with yourself. I'm like, yes, again, I'm my biggest support to me. But then also the people around me, they know, like my wife knows, if I have an exam due or something she knows like, hey, go ahead, knock it out. We're not, don't think about trying to take me out or do extra chores. Get what you need to get done. That is support, and you need people in your life that are going to be again conducive and helpful for you getting where you need to go.
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Speaker 1:All right, let's get back to the episode. So, now that we talked about some of the things that get in the way of us having vision, what are some of the things that we need to help us with the vision? I talked about support and you being the biggest support. Also, you have to value yourself, meaning don't look for other people to give you that validation, to be your cheerleader. You have to value you, affirm yourself. Y'all can't see behind me. I don't think. Yeah, but there's any type of trophy that I've won certificates that I've achieved my degrees. I keep them. So, as a reminder, like I know I've put in a lot of work, and it's not to brag or be cocky. I know I've put in a lot of work and it's not to brag or be cocky, but it's to let me know like I'm still valuing me and I'm going to validate. I'm going to validate me before I look at to you to validate me.
Speaker 1:So let's get into like, why vision is so important, one we talked about when you don't have vision or when you don't have clarity or focus, it throws you off. But when you do have vision, it clarifies your purpose. So the vision that I have for my family was always to have longevity, have security, have love, and because I wanted those things that made me go that much harder we were having a disagreement, having a fight. I knew this is temporary, this is not long-term, it's not permanent. If I knew we were struggling in a certain area, okay, let's figure it out. But because I had the vision for us, the long-term vision, it made my purpose just be defined that much more. I'm not about to give up just because we're having a rough time or we disagree about something.
Speaker 1:Sometimes we let small things get us way off track and we're like well, how did you even get there? Oh, you forgot about your purpose. You forgot that there are things that are bigger than you or things that you have committed to that keep you grounded, even when you don't feel like it. Another reason why vision is so important it does keep you motivated too. We don't do anything without purpose, values, but also being motivated, even the bad things, the things that we're not proud of, the things that we're like. Man, why do I keep doing that when I'm working with somebody to change their behavior, I always look at what is the, what is the outcome that you're getting, what is the reward? Before I'm not judging you before we look at like why do you do that? What is the outcome like, what is driving you in that area? So having the vision keeps you intrinsically motivated.
Speaker 1:Sometimes when I'm working out, I don't feel like working out. If I'm being straight up, honest with you. There are times, especially now, with like juggling work, school, life stuff, fatherhood, all of that. I'm like I got to work out too. But I know, because I know where I want to be and how I want myself to look and feel. I know because I know where I want to be and how I want myself to look and feel. It keeps me motivated, even when I'm like don't feel like it, that that vision is there. I know when I, when I eat healthy, when I follow my workout regimen, I know what I look like. I know what I feel like. The vision is there. So it keeps me going, even when I don't feel like it. I tell my swim coach all the time I don't I don't feel like it. I tell my swim coach all the time I don't desire to do it, but when I get into it it's like, okay, cool, I'm so happy afterwards. But that's when you have vision. I can see the outcome before it even gets there. I hope that makes sense.
Speaker 1:Being in school right now, I'm like man. I'm finishing up my second year. It's flying by Soon. You know writing and get ready to graduate. I saw that even when I first enrolled in the first class. That's what happens when you have the purpose, when you have the motivation. It helps make everything like crystal clear for you. When you have vision, it also aligns the goals that you have with the actions that you're taking.
Speaker 1:So now everything makes sense. It's still all strategic. So I'm thinking long term. I'm not thinking just like in the here and now phase, which, again, sometimes we get caught up doing that, we get stuck just like how we feel right now, today, and life is not about that. It's not all about instant gratification right now, today, and life is not about that. It's not all about instant gratification.
Speaker 1:If you look at study, delay, gratification, y'all the biggest and best things that we can accomplish, they don't happen overnight. It takes some time and this is no knock to you if you've had something just kind of given to you or you lucked up on something, but think about the things that really took work and effort. You value it much more, that relationship that you, you've worked through the hard times. You value it much more the degree, the business, the relationships with your family members. You value that much more than something that you can just like, buy or just kind of it comes at you without any work being involved, buy or just kind of it comes at you without any work being involved. Y'all vision for yourself, vision for your life. When you put it all together, you can really sit back like dang. I've been working super hard but I'm so proud of it because now I see the fruits of my labor.
Speaker 1:Last thing I want to say about vision and why it's so, so important Having the vision. It pushes you and forces you to be creative, because sometimes you might be doing something and you're like man, I'm feeling stuck. But when you know, okay, this is just a temporary moment, you got to get creative and figure this out, like now, you go into your toolbox how do I work through this problem? How do I get over this issue? Who do I call to ask for support. It pushes you out of your comfort zone because, again, you know what the long term goal is and what that long term success looks like for you.
Speaker 1:Of vision boards If you have not created a vision board, I would just encourage you to do so, because it's going to bring out that creativity. It's going to force you to be specific on what you want. Vague terms are cool, you know, kind of like all right, I want happiness, I want faith, I want more prayer, but then how many times do you want to pray? What are you praying for? How can you get a little bit more dialed in on what you want for you? When you do that, it makes the vision just come to life.
Speaker 1:I'll share some things that I put on my vision board. They really started to come into fruition and I wasn't even thinking about that the car that I drive. I did a vision board a couple years ago and I was just like picking out different cars. It's not like I was thinking like, oh, this is my car. But then, lo and behold, I got that car and it looks exactly like you did in the vision board. Other things where I wanted to travel, that was on the vision board, not me thinking like, oh, I want to travel to you know this state or this city or this country, but it was just I was really putting it on the vision board. But then it came, it happened, it came to fruition. I was like, wow, this really works. Not saying I didn't believe in it before. I've been doing vision boards, for I think my first one for sure was like right out of grad school, but each time it gets more and more specific. So I've seen the value of having vision boards, having vision period.
Speaker 1:But then I also know what gets in the way when you're around people who don't believe in you, when you're not affirming yourself. All of these become roadblocks and stop you from living and enjoying your life If you don't take anything away from this episode. One, have the right people around you. Two, make sure you have clarity on what you want. And then three, don't be afraid to fail. Failure is not that it's a part of life in aspects, but really you're learning from every single failure and every loss. Don't let it get in the way of your vision. If you really want it like, if you for real really want it, work at it. Get creative, get disciplined, get consistent, but do not, by all means, do not, give up. Don't give up on your vision, y'all. All right, be blessed Peace. Be blessed Peace.
Speaker 1:Thank you all for listening to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity podcast. Again, if you are feeling like, hey, I'm experiencing high functioning anxiety, don't beat yourself up about it. It is OK. We all experience anxiety from time to time and I gave you a couple of things that you can do on your own, but don't hesitate to reach out to a professional to better manage what you're going through. Okay, and lastly, make sure, if you have not like share, subscribe to the podcast and send this out to a friend, and if you want to hear certain episodes or have certain conversations, let me know. You can shoot me a DM or just leave a review and I will definitely follow up. All right, y'all. Be blessed Peace.