Imagine having a rich auntie who can impart financial wisdom, help you pay off debt, and guide you towards building your wealth. Today, we have the privilege of chatting with Bernadette Joy, a renowned money expert, who is just that—a rich auntie—and she takes us on an incredible journey of her transition from a staggering $300,000 debt to a whopping $1 million net worth, all in her 30s.
We take a peek into her tough journey, her slip-ups, and her money smarts, showing us how to wipe out debt, stash some cash, and invest with confidence.
One of the most enlightening aspects we delve into is Bernadette's bold decision to close her business in 2019, right before the pandemic hit. It's a raw and honest conversation about the real essence of financial freedom and how it goes beyond just the number game—it's a whole emotional odyssey.
We unpack the pressures of continually increasing net worth even at the point of financial freedom and discuss the role money plays in the pursuit of happiness, but without being a surefire recipe for joy.
Transitioning from financial to physical well-being, Bernadette shares insights on how nutrition impacts mental and physical health. Always mindful of her missteps, Bernadette helps us understand how learning from our money mistakes is an essential part of the journey.
Crush Your Money Goals Website
Get Bernadette Joy's Free Money Guide
Follow Bernadette on Instagram: @berndebtjoy
You Might Like:
Imagine having a rich auntie who can impart financial wisdom, help you pay off debt, and guide you towards building your wealth. Today, we have the privilege of chatting with Bernadette Joy, a renowned money expert, who is just that—a rich auntie—and she takes us on an incredible journey of her transition from a staggering $300,000 debt to a whopping $1 million net worth, all in her 30s.
We take a peek into her tough journey, her slip-ups, and her money smarts, showing us how to wipe out debt, stash some cash, and invest with confidence.
One of the most enlightening aspects we delve into is Bernadette's bold decision to close her business in 2019, right before the pandemic hit. It's a raw and honest conversation about the real essence of financial freedom and how it goes beyond just the number game—it's a whole emotional odyssey.
We unpack the pressures of continually increasing net worth even at the point of financial freedom and discuss the role money plays in the pursuit of happiness, but without being a surefire recipe for joy.
Transitioning from financial to physical well-being, Bernadette shares insights on how nutrition impacts mental and physical health. Always mindful of her missteps, Bernadette helps us understand how learning from our money mistakes is an essential part of the journey.
Crush Your Money Goals Website
Get Bernadette Joy's Free Money Guide
Follow Bernadette on Instagram: @berndebtjoy
You Might Like:
just from, like all the people that I've coached over the last couple of years and people that I've talked to, like behind closed doors, like it is really interesting to me how many people, like outwardly looking, feel like they have like quote, unquote, made it and have it all, and then behind the scenes, like have said similar things to me as well, and so I'm always grateful for people who are honest about that too.
Speaker 2:Hey, this is Allison, and welcome to the Inspire Budget podcast, where we talk all things budgeting, debt and saving money. Today, I am thrilled to welcome Bernadette Joy, the rich auntie we all wish we had. Bernadette is a money expert featured on platforms such as CNBC and Good Morning America. Bernadette's journey to financial freedom is nothing short of inspiring. She's paid off an astounding $300,000 in debt within three years and she has built a net worth of $1 million in her 30s. As a first generation Filipina American and she has since dedicated herself to teaching others to conquer their money goals. Bernadette, or Joy as she is affectionately known, is the founder of Crush your Money Goals, a money media company that serves up fun and practical educational content. In this episode, we'll be diving into planning for financial freedom. Bernadette will share her wealth of knowledge on paying down debt, saving money, investing with confidence and why you don't have to be perfect, just ready to learn. So, without further ado, let's welcome the fabulous Bernadette Joy. Bernadette, welcome to the Inspire Budget Podcast. I'm so happy you're here.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for having me. I'm so happy to be here too.
Speaker 2:Yes. So tell me, because you have such an inspiring story about your journey towards financial freedom, including how you paid off over $300,000 of debt, so I want you to share how you got that debt when you realize like, oh, this, this is no fun, I don't want this anymore and then your journey towards paying that off.
Speaker 1:Okay, so hello everyone.
Speaker 2:I am Bernadette Joy.
Speaker 1:Just some quick background. I'm first generation Filipino American. I'm the eighth of my dad's nine kids and I currently live in Charlotte, north Carolina, but group in New York City, and I think that's important stuff to share just to give you some context of how this all came to be. And so I would say that my personal finance journey where I really started taking money seriously was in 2016. And that was when I had accumulated what you refer to, the $300,000 of debt between kind of normal stuff that I think a lot of older millennials like me have, like mortgages and student loans, and then, just like the run of the mill bills, like you know, the ongoing credit cards and car stuff.
Speaker 1:I mentioned my background earlier because I, up until that point, thought I was doing everything right, like, according to my very traditional Filipino family, it's like, yeah, I got a good job, I bought a house, I even got my master's degree. Oh, you know, I was doing check, check, check, check, check, check, check, check did all the things I was supposed to do. And one day and I remember very specifically, it was January 2016. I had 10 weeks left in my MBA program and I had no clue really what I wanted to do with my life. Still, I had gone to the MBA program because I wasn't in love with my previous career and I was just like wait a minute.
Speaker 1:But I did everything that my parents said I should do. I did everything that society told me to do. Why am I so stressed out and and like unsure of myself? And that day I was like well, you know what, let me figure out how much I own my student loans, because I know I've been paying some along the way, but I really had no clue how much I had accumulated. And so I was actually in class at the time and I was like looking on my computer, like okay, like login, the first time ever that I've even looked at my student loans. Oh gosh, it was like over like $72,000. And I was just like wait, what? Like how, how did this happen? Like I didn't realize it was that much because I had, at the time, been paying payments all along as well.
Speaker 1:And so I was just like oh no, this, this cannot come to be like, this cannot happen. So I was totally in denial phase for a little bit. And then I went into anger. Like you know, the five stages of grief.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Now I'm angry and then it's like now I have to like come to terms with it.
Speaker 2:Wait, I have a question who were you angry with? Were you angry with yourself? Were you angry with your parents? Were you angry with the school system? I'm just curious.
Speaker 1:Honestly, I would have to say I was probably the most angry at myself at the time, because I was like I clearly signed off on this, and to be shocked about something that I had willingly agreed to, apparently yeah, read the fine print. In particular, I was really mad at myself about the fact that I did not understand that my student loans were occurring interest all along the way. In my brain for some reason at the time I thought like oh, it doesn't start occurring interest until after you finished school, right?
Speaker 2:Right, I don't know why I thought that.
Speaker 1:But that's like what I thought. And so when I saw, it's like, oh, it's been incurring interest for the last three years, like since day one.
Speaker 1:Oh, I just didn't know that, and so I was really mad at myself. And then I basically decided that day I wanted to do something Different, and I'm sure we'll talk more about it. I am married. I have a great husband who has been really supportive. But I went over to talk to him and I said look, I think I really messed things up. I signed up for this. Much, Tina, no either.
Speaker 2:Were you married at the time? Yeah, we were married at the time and you're like oops my bad, yeah, my bad, like.
Speaker 1:And his response was like but everyone has, everyone we know has student loans, everyone know has debt. Like, like, we'll figure out how to be okay.
Speaker 1:And I was like, no, this cannot be okay, because everyone else I know is also like working their butts off and like having a hard time making ends meet. And so I was just like, okay, well, I need to figure out how to do this. And fast forward to now, which is now seven years later. Right, Since then I've paid off all of this. I need $2,000 of student loans. We paid off multiple houses.
Speaker 2:Wow.
Speaker 1:And then we built our first million dollars of net worth, and I say that to say, like you know, when I even as I'm saying it out loud right now like seven years, felt like it was a it sounds like it could be a really long time, but it feels like it's flown by really, really fast.
Speaker 2:See, that's interesting, because well, in the middle of it did it feel like it was going fast?
Speaker 1:No, no. For me it never did, Especially the first year. The first year felt like, oh my God, like I like. When will this be over?
Speaker 2:Yes, okay, thank you. Yeah, and hindsight, looking back, it feels like it's flown by. But I remember being in that debt payoff time period for five years and I remember thinking like this is taking forever. I very much liken it to like right after I had a newborn and everyone's like the days are long but the years are short and I'm like everything's long, it's taking forever, yeah, okay. So I just want people to know like that's totally normal and you'll get to that point. Once you kind of have gotten through the tunnel, if you will, you've driven through the tunnel, you look back, you're like, oh, that tunnel wasn't so long, but it can feel long in the process. Okay, okay. Basically said oh, this seems kind of normal, but then you say that you guys worked together to build up your first $1 million in net worth. So was there ever a time when you had to get them on board? Or how did you approach that? Were you always on the same page?
Speaker 1:Oh no, we were never on the same page for most of the time. So my husband and I we've been married for now 12 years and so at the time we were married for about five. I also bring up my upbringing, the sense of like. My husband is also Filipino-American, but just because we're both Filipino, we actually grew up very, very differently. Like I grew up in New York City, he grew up in like very country like South Carolina. We had to have a lot of conversations about what we wanted to do as a couple, but also what our individual goals were.
Speaker 1:And so one of the challenges that we had that we weren't on the same page about initially, and why I was so urgent about wanting to pay off my student loans was at the time I had been working in corporate HR for almost like 10 years at that point and I really wanted to make a career change.
Speaker 1:But I knew that corporate wasn't going to be for me in the long term and I really wanted to figure out how to become an entrepreneur, whereas, like my husband is like he's like kind of the ideal corporate employee, like it doesn't bother him, like he doesn't tie his identity to it, like stuff doesn't stress him out about working for a larger company, and so in his mind he was just like well, the solution is simple, just go get another job and like we'll pay off the student loans and I'm like, no bro, I don't want to go. There's no way I want to do that. Like you and I are just wired differently, and so a lot of the conversations we've had to have, and even up until this point, is like always just recalibrating what. Well, what do you want to do, what do I want to do? And then, what is it? Where's the cross section of things that we wanted to do together as a couple.
Speaker 1:And the biggest way, which I know you're a big proponent of, of like how we were able to get in the same page is doing a budget every single month and like forcing ourselves to sit down and have those tough conversations while we're doing those budgeting sessions.
Speaker 2:Because he was fine with the way things were.
Speaker 1:He was totally fine. Yeah, his name is AJ. Like I love AJ for the fact, like that's why he's a good husband for me, because he's usually fine with most things. Like he's like okay, whatever you want to do. Like that sounds good to me. I'm like oh. I want to do this. I want to do that I want to do all these things.
Speaker 1:Where I really decided I wanted to pay down the debt more aggressively was that I also knew that, even though I wanted to take a risk and being entrepreneur, I wasn't going to try to like put both of our like well-being at risk and trying to pursue that dream.
Speaker 1:So I wanted to at least be at least student loan free at the time and it felt like, okay, well, if I can pay off my student loans then and I think this is also, like you know, me wanting to be somewhat independent in the sense of saying like I don't want to make it feel like he has to solve this problem that I kind of created- when, I didn't, when I wasn't sure what I did with the student loans, and so really the impetus of really getting on the personal finance journey and really on the road to financial independence started off with just wanting to pay off the student loans, and so my goal at the time was to pay off the $72,000 of student loans in like two years, which was impressive.
Speaker 2:And that's while you were working full time. Still yeah for corporate America.
Speaker 1:I was. I was working full time. I was also like starting up this side hustle. That was actually like a retail business I had at the time and I was still finishing up school at the time as well. Oh my gosh, when did you sleep? I didn't like to be honest, like I love to tell you. It's like, oh, I had an amazing balance and I had like the perfect morning routine. Like no, I just didn't sleep a lot for that.
Speaker 1:It was very unhealthy for two years yeah like 2016 was like a really hustle year, but I'm so grateful for having that journey back in 2016. And like it was really hard, like, like you said, like it felt really long at the time. But I, if I could go back like I still wouldn't trade one year of like really intense focus or and I was able to pay off the student loans in a year instead of two.
Speaker 2:Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I just like it was like really a lot of hustle there. But if I could go back in time, I don't think I would trade off like doing it in a longer period of time, because I think I probably would have quit by then. And that's just me Like I. Now I think I'm in a more mature mode of life where I can spread things out a little bit more.
Speaker 1:But at that time I was so hungry to get out of my corporate job that I was almost willing to like you said, almost like not sleep in order to do that. But now like and I'm also a lot older now Like I don't know that I could do that same kind of intensity.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I want to get the timeline straight. You decided OK, these student loans have been racking up. I want to start paying them off $72,000. I'm working in corporate America. I'm also finishing up my masters. You started paying them off. It took a year, so you continue to work full time during that year, right so?
Speaker 1:2016 is when I so. January 2016 is when I figured out like I need to start paying these off. I graduated in middle of 2016. Ok, my graduation was that year, and then I was working full time at my job and while I was in school, the one of my MBA projects was actually what turned into my side hustle at that time.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay.
Speaker 1:There was like about like a six month period where I was doing all three and then the MBA program luckily fell off, like at the in the middle of 2016. So then I was just focused on my full time job and my and my side hustle and then towards the end of 2016 I was able to, I actually ended up paying off the student loans by November of that year and and then the following January and 2017 I actually quit my day job to go full time into my business.
Speaker 2:That's awesome, and is that the business that you have today?
Speaker 1:No and it's not, which is crazy. Like as we're saying this out loud, I'm like, oh my gosh, it sounds like I'm super all over the place, but in hindsight again, like I think it was such a great journey. So that business was actually a retail dress business. It was like a local run-through runway, if you know run-through runway, like women could come to my store and like actually rent out dresses but like try them on in the store I did that because I've always had a love for fashion.
Speaker 1:But I realized when I was doing that and I did that business for three years that one I retail business is really challenging, Like you work nine to two weekends. I had 10 at one point that was like part time people that would work for me and stuff.
Speaker 1:But, I realized that actually the thing that I love the most about doing that business was helping women save money. Oh, I loved when women came in. They're like oh my gosh, I was about to buy this dress for like $300. I can rent it from you for like 99 bucks. And I also used to take women's dresses and like I would rent them out to other people. So like women would bring me like consignment yeah, like consignment, but they could have the dress back whenever they want.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It was so fun for me to see these women who are like oh my gosh, I made like 30 dollars from the dress that was hanging in my closet and, like I met so many incredible women through, that too, because a lot of women came for like gala and weddings and like fun things.
Speaker 1:But what is really interesting about doing that? I was styling a lot of these women and just being with them, like for you know, 45 minutes an hour, like dressing them for these events, like I learned so much about their lives and about like what was stressing them out, and it kind of became like a pseudo therapist sometimes, because they're like oh my gosh, I'm going to this wedding and my ex is going to be there, or like I'm going, you know, like I'm going to this gala and like you know, like I'm really nervous because I'm like the chair of the event.
Speaker 1:And that's really what started to get me interested in of like. Well, how can I help these women in a more meaningful way other than fashion? And that's when what is now Crusher Money Goals like really started to work, you like.
Speaker 2:Today's episode is brought to you by my budget to build wealth. Here's the truth. I do not believe actually I refuse to believe that wealth is just for the rich. I believe that wealth can be built on a budget without sacrificing what you love to spend money on. I fully believe that budgeting is the quickest, most effective way for you to reach your money goals. So, whether your goal is to stop living paycheck to paycheck, pay off those student loans that have been hanging over your head, or find room in your budget every single month so that way you can start investing for your future, you're going to need a guide, a plan to get yourself there, which is exactly what I'm sharing in my free training budget to build wealth.
Speaker 2:In this training, I'm going to be sharing three massive mistakes that people make with their budget and their financial plan, so that way you can avoid them. I'm going to be sharing with you the secret to freeing up more money in your budget each month, so that way you can send extra money to your goals, and I'm going to be sharing with you my tried and true four step framework to budgeting your way to wealth without giving up what you love. Plus, there is a very special free gift for anyone who stays until the end. You can sign up by going to inspiredbudgetcom slash class or just click the link in my show notes. You'll be able to choose a time that works for your schedule and I'll see you there. Oh my gosh, okay. So tell us about Crusher Money Goals.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so Crusher Money Goals. It's my company that does financial education and media related to financial independence, particularly targeted towards women. Crusher Money Goals the predecessor to it was a podcast called Crush this Debt. That really started out because when I was in the business, people would always ask me well, how did you start this business? And I would tell them the story of how I paid off all my student loans and I was in corporate and I quit, and now I do this and they're like and so then people started asking me well, how did you pay off the student loan so quickly? And it became like oh, can I get you, can I take you for a cup of coffee? Now, before I knew it, I was having like 10 cups of coffee a week and like I don't need more coffee, I don't necessarily need any more caffeine, right?
Speaker 1:No, you don't. So I was like I went to my husband one day and I was just like oh my gosh, like people keep asking to pick my brain and stuff, like I wish I could just record the answer and just like send it to them. And he was like you know, that's called a podcast, right? And I was like, oh, okay, so that's what I'll do, and so I just intended to do. It was a one season podcast, like here's exactly how I paid off my student loans. Like you can still find it online. But what I didn't expect was that people started reaching out to me and saying like oh, I listened to your podcast, like would you be willing to meet with me? And like coach me, or like Do you offer any classes or is there anything else I can do to work with you? And so that ended up evolving into crush your money goals, which I lost in 2020. And that was I made a really tough decision in 2019. And I think you'd appreciate this, because you're a FinCon kind of like community member, too, is.
Speaker 1:I went to my first FinCon in 2019 and I was thinking like, okay, like I just want to learn more about what people do in personal finance and like is this something I want to do and my podcast was doing pretty okay at the time and I saw the main stage speakers that day and I went to all these breakout sessions and I was like such the nerdy girl there where I was just like just had my little backpack and I was just like taking all these notes. Oh, I can picture it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I can see it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was like I didn't know anyone like I. It was in Washington DC. I think it was the first time I traveled by myself in a while too. I was like I think I'm going to try this, and so I decided to close my business to go.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow.
Speaker 1:Well, not knowing that the pandemic was obviously going to happen in 2020.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:Again in hindsight, like I actually feel like I'm not a real person, but I think someone was watching out for me because my business would have died anyway in 2020.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It would have been no events for people to go to. So, like I think it was, I'd like to say this is all like. Oh, I'm so skilled at things, I think. A lot of luck, god, I'm going to try my way too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean the fact that you showed up there, you decided to take that leap of leaving your business and then start this online business that a lot of people also see as like a crazy leap. I don't know how your friends and family reacted. I mean, you would already kind of had that entrepreneurial spirit, I guess because you had started your own business before that. But I know, whenever I started my business, people were like wait a minute, what are you doing? Like you're going to post on social media? This isn't a real thing. Who's going to tell her? Who's going to tell her that this isn't a real job? Right? So that shows a lot of courage. My question is, now that you have reached these goals, you've paid off this debt. You and your husband are maybe someone on the same page. You've grown your net worth. You're in a completely different position from where you started many years ago, back in 2016, like you said. So my question is would you say that you've reached what one would call financial freedom?
Speaker 1:Ah, I'm so glad you're asking this question now and I think it's really on top of mine.
Speaker 1:My honest answer is no, I don't think so, but it's less so from like the mathematical, like do I have enough money?
Speaker 1:Thing. I think I still have so much to work on in terms of kind of a cliche things people talk about, like mindset and stuff, and what I mean by that is and actually before we started recording, I was mentioning to you I've just had some stuff going on with my family recently and I realized this especially this last couple of weeks that I still struggle with prioritizing, like truly prioritizing like health and mental health and mental wellness first. I'm still very much like in that mode of like well, I want to grow my net worth, I want to grow my net worth, and this past year in particular, I've really had to take a step back and say, okay, like, why, like how much more do you really want to grow your net worth? To say that you've had enough money and then also, like when are you going to really start prioritizing, like the things that you said that really matter, and so I've gotten really good in terms of like my work schedule is not crazy anymore.
Speaker 1:Like.
Speaker 1:I do see a lot of friends and family. I travel a ton. But if I had to be perfectly honest, do I feel like I'm exactly where I want to be from like a health perspective and from a mental wellness perspective? Probably not. And I think to say that I'm truly financially free would be inclusive of that. Like I think that financial freedom really means that you spend the money to put your mental health and your physical health first, without like feeling guilty about it, without feeling like you're wasting money, and I feel like I'm like 60% of the way there. I don't think I'm 100% of the way there.
Speaker 2:yet oh my gosh, I appreciate your authenticity and your honesty, because it could have been really easy for you to be like I love all this money. I started a job. Of course, I have reached this financial freedom, and it makes me wonder, because I would not say that I've reached financial freedom by any means yet. But I wonder how much people struggle with working towards this goal, working towards this goal and that becoming so ingrained in their process and their habit and their personality that, once they reach the goal, they don't know how to stop working towards it and making it bigger than they need to be, yes, than it needs to be. And that's where I'm almost like okay, allison, like Step very cautiously into this. But I just wonder how many people feel that but don't know how to voice it or don't feel like they can voice it.
Speaker 1:I Think if I, if I had to put a number on it, I probably say like 75%.
Speaker 1:This statistic is completely made up, but we're gonna go statistically not significant number at all, but like just from like all the people that I've coached over the last couple of years and people that I've talked to, like behind closed doors, like it is really interesting to me how many people like outwardly looking, feel like they have like quote-unquote made it and have it all, and then behind the Steve's like, have said similar things to me as well, and so I'm always grateful for people who are honest about that too. Where there's a saying like money can't buy happiness and Like, to a certain extent, I like disagree with that same in the sense of like money has been able to buy me, you know, like security and like the right place to live and Therapy and all the things that I need in order to pursue happiness. But I would say a couple of years ago I would have looked at certain people and be like well, they have all the things like, what reason did they have to be stressed out about things? And now that I've reached a certain level of financial security and I still feel like I struggle particularly on like I would say like mental health types of things, and part of it is genetics like I like there's like Bipolar and depression things like run in my family. But part of it also is like, like you said, like there is a lot of like Things that people are maybe grappling with but don't know how to, how to express I.
Speaker 1:I made a very clear decision for myself that I had to, this year in particular, really have to start figuring out how to, how to flip that switch from always wanting to grow my network it's a really focusing very cliche but on my self-worth and and sometimes it's, it's been hard for me, I would say, in the sense of like a lot of people look at me externally, even close friends of mine. They are like oh you're, I've been, I've been described as like fierce and like fearless and like thing. You know, people expect that like, oh I'm, you're so strong when I see you, but like there are days where I'm just like I don't want to do this ish either, like you know.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I.
Speaker 1:Definitely and I think that needs to be a conversation more particularly in personal finance of where, really, at the end of the day, like you can, you can pursue all the money that you want, but if you're not healthy and you're, and you don't feel like you earned it, like how much does that work?
Speaker 2:No, I love that and I think the same can be true when people are doing things like setting goals for paying off debt, because you can work and work and work towards this goal. And then you get there and you're thinking it's gonna be like balloons and sunshine and the clouds are gonna open up and the Light's gonna filter through and everything's gonna be different and it's the same. The only difference is that monthly payment, which that monthly payment can Can buy convenience. It can give you choices and options, but that doesn't mean that, like, your mental health is different.
Speaker 1:So yeah, I would tell you this, like one of the things that I've really materially changed in how I coach other, like other people Is no, back in the day, when I first started doing pressure money goals like I was very much like pay down all your debt as quickly as possible, like cut everything, like I was, I was pretty much on that like like go all all in on that. Mm-hmm. I figured out for myself like what that ended up doing for me was that once I did actually have money and I was able to afford things like I was scared to spend it. Like I was Like I, it was really hard to make that mental switch. So now what I do when I teach other people personal finances like I actually Like force, people have force.
Speaker 1:That doesn't. That's not that sounds like, but like actually I would say I probably do force a lot of my clients to do this, where when I look at their budgets, like they have to put at least 25% Towards, like joyful things, like towards spending money on stuff that they don't need, and people are often really surprised when they're like, but wait, you're wanting to pay off all the stuff, but you still want me to go to the movies.
Speaker 1:You're still want me to go to Beyonce. Like, like, what is that allowed? Is that okay? It's like, and so I've explained to people. Like, yeah, it might delay your debt payoff a little bit longer, but I would rather you build the healthy habit of learning how to spend money Without so much guilt now Because you try to do that all now. If you try to pay off all the debt now and then you don't leave any room for joy, then it like spending becomes joyless later on, when you actually can afford it.
Speaker 2:So yeah, and it leads to burnout.
Speaker 1:It totally leads to burnout. And I think the other thing too is like especially for women is Like oftentimes we're reprimanded for the things that we want to spend money on because they seem, or whatever, like y'all can't see me right now, but I have like very pink hair and and it looks amazing, by the way.
Speaker 1:And you know some personal finance folks would say, like, oh, you're trying to tell people to pay off debt, but like you're saying it's okay to get your hair done and like I just learned over the years that Different things mean different things for for different people. Like, for example, like I have a lot of clients who are African American and like, for them, getting their hair done is like a very different, like cultural and like, like very like visceral experience than maybe for somewhat for someone for another ethnicity right.
Speaker 1:So I've learned that, like, part of this journey of learning how to budget well and spend well is also to really Honor what is valuable to you, but like, not just Like, oh, this is what self-care looks like for women, like or this is why I will tell us we should do like Part of the journey is figuring out what, what you really enjoy, because the flip side and I've seen it with both my parents and my In-laws is that once you do have enough money and you can potentially retire like I've seen them both, I've seen my my in-laws be like, well, I don't know what to do and I'm afraid to spend money, though they work so hard.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm. And then I go back to work, maybe longer than I need to, because I have this fear, I have this lack of purpose or I don't really know what you know I'm going to delay retirement because of the fear around it.
Speaker 2:Yeah Right, okay. So I have a question that is totally going off script. Not that you actually have a script I didn't give you a script but my question for you, after being so open and honest and you saying, like, 2023 is the year when you're going to kind of scale back and focus on your mental health, your personal health, I want to know what's one thing left in the year that you want to spend money on that will help benefit that area of your life. Like you, bernadette Joy, how are you going to, like, put that into action?
Speaker 1:Ooh, I like this because now it's going to be recorded and I'm going to have to do it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's right, you are.
Speaker 1:Honestly, the first thing that popped into my head is probably hiring some sort of like nutritionist, health coach in particular, which, like in my brain again like as, like an Asian American, like I could hear my Asian family being. Like you need to pay someone to tell you like what to eat. Like what the heck like you?
Speaker 1:know, and and for me like managing my like how I eat has been always, has always been, a challenge for me, and it's more on the preventative side. So like in my family like diabetes runs a lot and then a lot of my the women in my family have had like kidney failure and stuff, and so I and I've been hospitalized twice for like my kidneys in the past and so I know I can't like outrun my genetics completely but I can't really help the situation and I know that I was a big piece of it and I will be totally honest, like I would eat like chocolate for breakfast, lunch and dinner if I could.
Speaker 2:I know you would. I would do the same thing, and diabetes also runs in my family. And so I feel like, maybe like that craving of the sweets, like I mean, I'm no scientist, but I feel like maybe there's like something in common there, oh.
Speaker 1:I went when you and I are in Puerto Rico is like I'm going to order all the desserts and you're like, haha. I was like no, I'm really serious yeah well then, I did too.
Speaker 2:I was like, okay, let's go on this.
Speaker 1:So, you know, I think that's something that I really want to focus on in particular, because I also know that and I've noticed this too with like personal finance stuff, like there's always like this emphasis on like oh, don't eat out and like don't waste money on food and stuff. But I've actually had some clients who've taught me like how, how, like nutrition and how their food habits affect their overall like mental health and well-being, and so I've never really spent a lot of time or energy on on doing that, and so, like you, asking me that question today actually is like really good for me. So thank you.
Speaker 2:Oh, my God, you're welcome. Well, I hope that you do. Another thing, I will say that there was a period of time more, whenever my life, my kids were in school and it was just chaos. I was trying to eat really healthy, was. I would actually go to a place that prepared the foods and I went twice, twice a week, to pick up all of my meals and it was freaking expensive. But it was good for me during that period of time to know like, okay, I'm eating foods that are good for me and that are going to be good for my body. So I think that it's, and I did it. I mean, even my husband was like, do it. Like, if this is what, what you need to be healthy and to live longer and to be in a better you know mood, because your food can impact all those things, it was an easy yes, so we're gonna, I'm gonna be checking up on you. This podcast airs on November 9th, so you have some time because we're recording August 1st.
Speaker 1:So by November 9th, I would love for you to let me know if you literally put in my calendar right now, and I will like send you an email about how.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, because I want to know I really, I really do, just as your friend. I do want to thank you.
Speaker 1:I appreciate you saying that just because, like, even though you just bringing up that idea of just like, okay, like you know I can, there's multiple ways to go about this and I forgot about, like, the dropping thing, and there's literally one like not that far away from me, so I think, yeah you can exactly.
Speaker 2:You could do that. You could say okay every day, for, like, I did it for lunches and dinners every day. Actually, I did three weeks of everything I ate was from this place and then I slowly like scaled it back and now I can just go in whenever I just need something, when I, when my life is chaotic and I know I'm, I know my choices are either I'm not going to eat at all until I get really hungry and I'm going to binge, or I'm going to eat McDonald's or some macaroni and cheese or something like that. Like when I know I'm at that point, then I can just like run in and grab something. So and they're healthy. But At the end of our podcast episode I like to ask my guests three questions, just to get to know you better, although I feel like we know you so well for you being so open, thank you. But the first question is what is one thing you are looking forward to?
Speaker 1:I will be going to Korea in October and I'm really excited for that because it's an eight day tour where I get to visit all of the places where all these Korean dramas were on the show. I'm just going to be like a fan girl, like touristy person for eight days and I'm very excited about it, I love it.
Speaker 2:Is your husband going with you? Are you going alone? He's going with me too.
Speaker 1:He's actually like even more excited than I am. We went to South Korea. That's what he wanted to do, but we couldn't figure out how to do that, and so we are doing it this time like the right way, oh good.
Speaker 2:The second question is what's one money mistake you've made that you would tell everybody to avoid?
Speaker 1:This is both metaphorical and literal. Don't be the person that buys all the rounds of shots. So like back in my twenties. I actually don't like drink much at all anymore, but back in my twenties like I was definitely like big into drinking and I live in.
Speaker 1:New York City and like I had a good job, like I was that person back in the day, it's like round of shots on me, round of shots on me and like then have like hundreds of dollars of like alcohol, that. What for people that I don't even talk to anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what did it become? Like an expectation also, like they were waiting for you to buy a round of shots. Like did that impact your friendships?
Speaker 1:Sometimes, yeah. So sometimes I felt like people like did expect it, but also like I think it was me just like trying to like be somebody at the time.
Speaker 2:Right so.
Speaker 1:I look back on that now and just like I actually tried to calculate how much money I would have made if I had invested that money.
Speaker 2:No, don't do it. Don't do it. That can make you sad. It would be really sad. So I, yeah, no, not good for your mental health, we're going to X that.
Speaker 1:So, but I think, metaphorically, like, what I mean by that too is just, like you know, stop trying to be that person that's trying to like show up in a way that's like not actually like meaningful or whatever.
Speaker 2:If you're going to show up for people like.
Speaker 1:Show up in a way that actually like, is authentic to you want to be.
Speaker 2:I love it. Our third question is not a question at all. Just finish this sentence.
Speaker 1:My favorite thing I've ever spent money on is my home in Asheville that I lived in for just two years. Why did you only live there for just two years? Well, it was during the pandemic, okay, and my husband and I just wanted to get like away from the city and like from walking the same loop in our in our neighborhood, and so we moved to Asheville, north Carolina, for during the pandemic for two years to just like get a change of scenery, and I feel like it was like a really good time for me to just like reset and like also like get more into nature stuff. But that's also where I really started like thinking about how I want to live life differently, and so I went back to Charlotte after that. But it was a great. It was a it was a.
Speaker 1:It was kind of an impulse purchase Really.
Speaker 2:So did you move from New York city?
Speaker 1:down to Asheville. So I moved from New York city to Charlotte and then the pandemic hit. And then we moved from Charlotte to Asheville, which is about like three hours away, okay, but we had basically, we were like it was a pandemic thing where it was like I think July of the pandemic in 2020 and we're like we're going crazy. You know, like we have a left-over home in months and we're like, well, where can we go, where we can get more fresh air? And so we, luckily, because we had paid off all our debt and we had kind of built up some savings, we said, well, let's go see if we can find a place in Asheville. And we literally bought a condo Like we didn't even see it.
Speaker 2:Wow.
Speaker 1:And we bought it and lived there for two years and then we sold it out for the two years. So Okay.
Speaker 2:Well, there you go. As long as it was after two years, right? That's exactly why that's the tax, tax benefit there. Well, Bernadette, go ahead and tell our listeners where they can learn more about you and connect with you.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you so much for having me. This was super fun. I can be found at crushyourmoneygoalscom. I have a free guide if you want to learn the 10 tools that I use that help me become a debt free millionaire. It's on my website and then I'm primarily on Instagram at Bernadette Joy.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, we'll link to your Instagram and your website and we'll also link to the crushyourmoneygoals guide. Thank you so much, bernadette. This was fun and I can't wait to hear from you, to hear how you're prioritizing your physical health and getting your. What did you say you wanted? You wanted to hire a nutritionist.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes.
Speaker 2:I want to know how I'm eating. Yes, I want to hear all about it. Okay, thank you for joining us.
Speaker 2:I hope you enjoyed today's podcast episode and interview with Bernadette Joy. If you enjoyed today's episode, it would mean the world to me if you would actually leave a rating or review wherever you are listening to this podcast. What that does is it allows my podcast to actually be filtered out to other people that might like it as well. It's just a really easy way to support me on my journey of reaching more listeners. I'll be back next week with another brand new episode. See you then.