Inspired Budget

#134: Building Self Control To Reach Your Money Goals

November 30, 2023 Allison Baggerly Episode 134
Inspired Budget
#134: Building Self Control To Reach Your Money Goals
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Are your financial goals often derailed by a lack of self-control? Ever wondered why your brain fixates on the immediate rush of impulsive buying instead of the long-term satisfaction of financial security?

Don't worry, you're not alone! It's a common struggle, tied to the reasons behind our shopping habits. This episode is all about unpacking this challenge and providing practical steps to improve self-control and regain control over your spending habits.

We'll tackle topics like the danger of justifying one-time exceptions, how these small indulgences become a snowballing financial strain, and how to avoid this pitfall. We'll share personal experiences and success stories, along with proven strategies for setting clear, achievable goals. The focus is on setting boundaries, resisting temptation, and the essential role of a supportive accountability system.

So come join us, let's take control of our financial journey together. Remember to share your key takeaways and goals with us on Instagram at @inspiredbudget and let's overcome our financial struggles together!

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Speaker 1:

Now, I will never forget when we were first paying off debt, I had an obsession with Target. I will admit now that my obsession with Target, my love for Target, has lessened over time. I'm almost sad to say that because I loved Target so much. But I really had an issue with Target. I was that cliche person. I would walk into Target with my baby on my hip or in the stroller and I would buy a latte and I would stroll up and down the aisles of Target. I really was a cliche.

Speaker 1:

Hey, this is Allison, and welcome to the Inspire Budget podcast, where we talk all things budgeting, debt and saving money. Today we're diving into a topic that, let's be real, can be a bit challenging for many of us Self control, specifically how our sense of discipline impacts our ability to stick to our money goals, like becoming debt free. Now, I'm not gonna sit here and pretend that during our debt free journey, I had 100% control over any of my desire to impulse spend. In fact, I really struggled when it came to self control. My husband, on the other hand, he really didn't. He was very focused, but I tend to get a little, let's say, sidetracked and tempted. So if you're like me, if you struggle with having self control to stick to your money goals and maybe you get started and you tend to give up, well then, this episode is for you. Before we dive into the step by step or the how to behind this podcast episode because you know I love leaving you with actionable things that you can do to help you manage your money better let's talk about the behind the scenes.

Speaker 1:

Mentally, what's going on when it comes to self control and the slippery slope behind it, our brains are wired for immediate rewards. This made sense in early human history, when instant decisions could mean life or death. I mean, think about it whenever a caveman was running around, he had to make an instant decision whenever he saw a bear or a lion. Fast forward to today and we don't have those types of threats, but this instinct translates into a desire for instant pleasure, be it from food, entertainment or impulse spending. When we see something we want, our brain releases this dopamine.

Speaker 1:

I want you to picture yourself just scrolling on Amazon right now or wherever you like to shop online. You're scrolling through Amazon and you see something that you want. What's happening is your brain releases dopamine. And then, when we buy it, guess what the pleasure we get from buying. That is real. I feel those dopamine hits. I get that high. The only issue is that feeling it's short lived. Now, when you compare that with delayed gratification of saving for the future, hello, there's not gonna be a dopamine hit there. I know which one I wanna do.

Speaker 1:

I want that instant gratification, even though mentally in my brain I know that it's better to be saving for those long-term goals. This is why we often find it much more challenging to save rather than to spend money, and I probably don't even need to tell you about the financial impact of instant gratification. I mean, many of us have that financial impact looking back at us in the form of credit card statements. This instant gratification can completely derail our long-term financial goals when we consistently choose that short-term dopamine hit by making purchases over saving money and paying down debt, and over time, as those choices accumulate, we are being led into higher debt, credit cards and just a financial strain that keeps our goals further and further away. Gosh, this is starting to sound a little depressing, isn't it? That's okay, I'm just here to call it what it is.

Speaker 1:

Then we have the slippery slope, and this is where I really fall prey. Personally, it's that feeling of when you're buying something and you say, oh, just this once, just this once, I'm going to buy this item or just this once. We're not going to send our extra money to debt. However, as we start allowing these one-time exceptions or two-time exceptions, it becomes really easy to continue justifying it, and when this happens, we find ourselves on a slippery slope and that looks like being able to start justifying this extra spending and ultimately losing our self-control when it comes to our money.

Speaker 1:

Now, recognizing when we're on this slippery slope is crucial. That's one thing I do really well, I feel like I do is I'll get on that slippery slope. I'll notice my overspending, I'll notice my impulse spending and I'm fully aware of it. In the past, I would. I was totally unaware. I would lock those thoughts or that, those feelings, in a closet and I didn't even know that I was on this slippery slope. These days, it's different. Do I still struggle with self-control when it comes to my money? Absolutely. Do I still struggle with impulse spending? Yes, I do. However, I recognize when I'm on that slippery slope and whenever I do recognize it, I can make choices to help me get back on track, because I know that our money goals are important, even if they don't come with that lovely dopamine hit.

Speaker 1:

So what are we going to do? How do we boost our self-control to stick to our money goals, especially when your money goal is to pay off debt, which you probably have some emotions about in the first place, right? Well, here are five things that you can do to boost your self-control when it comes to reaching your money goals. The first is to set clear, specific goals. It's really easy to set a goal, to say, hey, I want to pay off debt and assume that this goal is going to be in and of itself, enough of a reason for you to actually stick through with it and it is. But also it's not. Because it's not clear, it's not specific. So, instead of doing that, set very clear goals. Maybe you want to say I want to pay off $1,000 of debt a month, or I want to pay off $500 of debt a month. By setting these clear, specific goals, you know exactly what you need to do to reach that goal. You have a dollar amount tied to it. You have a timeline tied to it. This is exactly what my husband and I did when we were paying off debt.

Speaker 1:

Now we started with a large amount of debt $111,000. We knew it would take us a long time. Our original timeline was about five years. We also knew that our life would be changing during that time. We knew we would be growing our family. We knew we were going to buy a home. We knew that we couldn't set a goal that was so detailed. So, instead of setting this long-term five-year goal, we set yearly goals. So we would say, hey, we want to pay off $24,000 of debt a year. If we decided we wanted to pay off $24,000 of debt in the year, then we could just divide that across 12 months. Now we have our monthly goal. By having that monthly goal, it allowed us to really have more self-control over our money, because we didn't have this far-fetched goal that just was off in the distance. No, we knew exactly what we needed to do that month within the next 30 days.

Speaker 1:

Those clear and specific goals can help boost your self-control because they also act as little wins. They act as momentum and motivation, and sometimes that's enough to say you know what? Amazon, not today. The second thing you can do to boost your self-control and stick to your money goals is to give yourself a visual reminder. Now. I'm very much a visual person and from the very beginning of paying off debt, I had created this thermometer because I knew I would need to physically see how much debt we were paying off. Just going in and logging in or seeing it even on a spreadsheet, it wasn't enough of a motivation for me. So take your goal, whatever it is, your money goal that you're working towards, whether it is to save a certain amount, invest a certain amount, pay off debt, set up your emergency fund, whatever it is and look for a chart, a graph, create a vision board, something that you can track your progress on. By tracking your progress, it gives you motivation and it actually boosts your self-control. In fact, this is exactly what Jodi from my Inspire Budget Inner Circle did. She wrote a post and said I made an extra debt payment. I love using the debt tracker sheet to track my progress. She loves it because she can visually see it. It is a reminder there for her seeing hey, this effort, this work, it is not going unnoticed, there is a purpose and a reason behind it and that, in and of itself, can help boost that self-control and keep her going on to the next step when it comes to paying off debt.

Speaker 1:

Today's episode is brought to you by my budget to build wealth. Here's the truth. I do not believe actually I refuse to believe that wealth is just for the rich. I believe that wealth can be built on a budget without sacrificing what you love to spend money on. I fully believe that budgeting is the quickest, most effective way for you to reach your money goals. So, whether your goal is to stop living paycheck to paycheck, pay off those student loans that have been hanging over your head, or find room in your budget every single month so that way you can start investing for your future, you're going to need a guide, a plan to get yourself there, which is exactly what I'm sharing in my free training budget to build wealth. In this training, I'm going to be sharing three massive mistakes that people make with their budget and their financial plan, so that way you can avoid them. I'm going to be sharing with you the secret to freeing up more money in your budget each month, so that way you can send extra money to your goals, and I'm going to be sharing with you my tried and true four step framework to budgeting your way to wealth without giving up what you love. Plus, there is a very special free gift for anyone who stays until the end. You can sign up by going to inspiredbudgetcom slash class or just click the link in my show notes. You'll be able to choose a time that works for your schedule and I'll see you there.

Speaker 1:

The third thing you can do to help stick to your money goals is a big one, but thankfully it is the easiest one of all, and that is to automate your money. Let's say that you want to send an extra $400 to your car loan every month, instead of just hoping you get around to it, instead of just saying, oh, I'll go ahead and send that whenever I have the time. No, set it up as an automatic payment that's coming out every single month on top of your regular car payment. This is what our family does now when it comes to setting aside money for Christmas, our HOA dues and flood insurance. On the fifth of every month, we have money transferred out of our checking account because it's right after we get paid. So we have money in our checking account. We have $175 transferred out to go to a Christmas fund and $175 transferred out to go to a separate HOA dues fund, because we pay our HOA dues annually.

Speaker 1:

I want to set aside money for that. They're $1300. I have no desire to be hit with a $1300 bill that I forgot about. So we have that money taken out of our checking account automatically every single month on the fifth of the month. Why? Because if that money is sitting in my account and it's up to me to sit there and make the transfer, there's a chance I'll forget.

Speaker 1:

I am human. I make mistakes, I forget things. But guess what? A computer is not. A computer is not human. It's not going to forget, it's not going to miss that transfer. It's not going to get sick or have an emotional breakdown or whatever it is that keeps you sometimes from following through with some of the things that we say. And maybe it's not an emotional breakdown I'm speaking from experience here but it's not. And that's why automating your finances is so easy. It gives you that money goal and it says, ok, come hell or high water, this thing is going to happen and we're going to be setting aside money for these savings. So automate your finances as much as you can. I'm not talking just about your bills. I mean, obviously you can easily automate all of your bill payments every month. I'm also talking about your money goals, your savings, your investing and, yes, your debt payments too. The fourth way to boost your self-control and stick to your money goals is to avoid temptation.

Speaker 1:

Now, I will never forget when we were first paying off debt, I had an obsession with Target. I will admit now that my obsession with Target, my love for Target, has lessened over time. I'm almost sad to say that because I loved Target so much. But I really had an issue with Target. I was that cliche person. I would walk into Target with my baby on my hip or in the stroller and I would buy a latte and I would stroll up and down the aisles of Target. I really was a cliche and I had this issue where I felt like I had to walk out of Target with something extra or something pretty almost and I know it's not something I'm proud of.

Speaker 1:

But I got to the point where I realized, hey, I have this pool, I have this draw to Target. I need a detox, I need to detox myself and my habits from this temptation, from this store that I gave too much of my power to and I needed to avoid it completely. And so I took time away from Target and it was hard and that seems so silly for me to say that. Now I realized that, but it was my truth and I just remember saying like, hey, it's gonna be there. Like Target's not going anywhere unless unless you live in Canada. Sorry, my friends up North, target left you, but it wasn't gonna go anywhere. So I had to say, hey, I'm just not gonna go into the store for a while, while I take back some of my self-control, while I regain self-control. It doesn't mean I'm gonna be gone forever from Target, but it means for right now I am going to be, and it really helped me almost break some of that habit.

Speaker 1:

So this, for you, might not look like no longer going into a store. Maybe it looks like unsubscribing from specific store emails or avoiding certain stores. Maybe it means deleting the Amazon app off of your phone or unfollowing people on social media that encourage you to buy and you are tempted after you see what they have, whatever it is, find one thing, just one thing you can do to avoid temptation. Remove it, take it out of sight, out of mind, so that way you can be focused on your money goals. This is exactly what an inner circle member did.

Speaker 1:

I wrote down this person's win every every week. I love it. Every week we have a weekly win where people share their wins, and I ask for wins that aren't just money related, because we're working on our money, but Our money isn't always just our dollars and cents, right? Sometimes it is our habits. So, anyway, this inner circle member said in her weekly win I put stuff in an online cart, reviewed the budget, realized I could make it work, but that I didn't really need it and so I didn't buy it. That's a big win for me. Oh my gosh, I love that win so much because you can see. You can see the progression here. She's adding things to her online cart. She says, huh, wait a minute, I wrote a budget, let me see if I can make this work. She looks at the budget, realizes, yeah, I could make this work, I could buy this, but I don't really need these things right here, and then doesn't buy them. Like, think about that process. That's the mental process. Those are the steps that I could not do at the beginning of my journey, and I'm guessing she couldn't either. But now she can and she can stick to those money goals when we can pause, have that internal dialogue and then make decisions based off of our values and our money.

Speaker 1:

Okay, the last tip I have for you to boost your self-control and stick to your money goals is to stay accountable to someone. Here's the deal. We do not all need accountability partners. Some people are super disciplined. That's my husband. He doesn't need an accountability partner, he doesn't need a workout buddy, he doesn't need anyone to check in with. But that's not me. I personally need and look forward to having some sort of accountability when it comes to the goals I'm reaching. That's why, after years, years of working out from home and never being part of a gym, I am now shelling out almost $200 a month to go to a local gym that I love. And why do I love it? I work out well, but I have accountability. There are coaches there that know me by name and I wanna show up. I have friends that go to the gym with me, go to these workout classes, and I am more likely to show up and be there for myself when I have that accountability, especially when I was getting started. And the same is true when it comes to your money and your money goals.

Speaker 1:

Find someone that you can share your goals with, your dreams. Tell them hey, this is what I'm working on. I'm working to pay off this much of debt in the next 12 months. Can we text each other? Do you mind if I text you just to help hold myself accountable and let you know whether or not I was able to send extra money to debt? Just because you have an accountability partner doesn't mean they need to know the ins and outs and the details of your goal. It's just someone to encourage you. Now, obviously, your accountability partner can be your spouse, your partner, a family member, a friend, and sometimes your accountability comes from people you don't even know, especially when you feel like it can be very vulnerable to share your finances and your money goals with those closest to you. Sometimes that feels a little vulnerable and if that's the case, then you can find a group online. That's exactly why people join. My membership is they are looking for encouragement, accountability and a step-by-step system. So having that accountability can help boost your self-control and truly stick to your money goals. Before we wrap up, I do wanna share this because I am so excited. Someone from my inner circle we're gonna call her Anna she joined the inner circle and in October she actually posted this, she said.

Speaker 1:

Since joining this group, I am aware of where my money goes, how much I need each month, and have a realistic I love this realistic debt payoff plan. I had a 560 credit score and now I am at 680. I was able to consolidate debt with a lower interest loan. I went on vacation without having to dip into savings and had enough money to cover all the bills when we came back. I set up an emergency fund and I am still able to enjoy nights out with my mom and husband. Through it all, I am excited to finally be debt free by 2026.

Speaker 1:

I mean, think about that. Is she debt free? No, but is she living a life where she has self-control, motivation and she is still reaching her money goals? Absolutely, and she's doing it while still taking vacations. That is what I want for you. That is what is possible out there. That is a beautiful example of balance and determination.

Speaker 1:

So congrats to you, anna. I'm so excited for you and I can tell that you're truly proud of yourself. So there you have it Five things that you can do to boost your self-control and stick to your money goals. Those are to set clear, specific goals, include a visual reminder of what you're working toward, automate your finances, avoid temptation and finally stay accountable to someone. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and, if you're inspired, I want you to do me a favor. I want you to go onto Instagram and send me a DM at inspiredbudget, and I just want you to tell me what one of your money goals is, or one takeaway from this episode. I cannot wait to hear from you, and I'll be back next week with another brand new episode. See you then.

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