An Evolving Man Podcast
An Evolving Man Podcast looks at leadership, peak performance, psychology, healing trauma, boarding school syndrome, spirituality and complexhealing. Every week there will be an interview or a podcast around topics ranging from self-development, leadership, relationships, spirituality, education, and peak performance featuring authors and leaders in these fields.
An Evolving Man Podcast
Boarding School Syndrome in Women: Trauma, Hyper-Independence & Healing | Kara Blackmore | AEM #147
In this episode of An Evolving Man, Piers speaks with Kara Blackmore — a trauma-informed coach specialising in the long-term emotional and nervous system impacts of boarding school experiences, especially for women.
Kara shares her personal story: choosing boarding school at age 10, the shock of early separation, and the reality of living in an environment with minimal adult supervision, rigid control, and peer-led power dynamics. Together, Piers and Kara explore how emotional neglect and chronic stress can shape adulthood — from hyper-independence and people-pleasing to perfectionism, difficulty resting, and challenges with intimacy, trust, and receiving support.
This conversation is honest, powerful, and at times harrowing — but it also offers hope. Kara speaks about the healing journey: awareness, learning emotional language, inner child work, nervous system safety, and building a life that makes your “soul sing.”
Key themes include:
- “I chose to go” and why childhood “choice” isn’t true consent
- emotional neglect, lack of nurturing, and chronic loneliness
- puberty, privacy, and missing maternal support
- perfectionism/control as a survival strategy
- why ex-boarders struggle to rest, receive, and ask for help
- healing through awareness, compassion, and nervous system repair
Find Kara: https://karablackmorecoach.com/
https://www.facebook.com/kara.thompson.589
https://www.instagram.com/kara__blackmore_coach/
If you found this episode meaningful, please share it — these stories stay hidden for decades, and speaking them is how change happens.
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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.
He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.
He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1
For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross
For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic
For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community
Many blessings,
Piers Cross
http://piers-cross.com/