All About The Joy
All About The Joy is a weekly hang-out with friends in the neighborhood! We share insight, advice, funny-isms and we choose to always try and find the positive, the silver lining, the "light" in all of it. AATJ comes from the simple concept that at the end of the day we all want to have more JOY than not. So, this is a cool place to unwind, have a laugh and share some time with friends!
All About The Joy
The Psychology of Pet Peeves: What Everyday Annoyances Say About Us
What does it say about you when someone's failure to use a turn signal sends you into a rage? Or when the sound of someone chewing makes your skin crawl? In this engaging conversation, we dive deep into the psychology behind our pet peeves and what they reveal about our values and expectations.
The hosts share their most triggering annoyances – from drivers who don't signal to people typing loudly on keyboards, from inappropriate workplace attire to individuals taking loud personal calls in public spaces. What emerges is a fascinating pattern: most pet peeves stem from a fundamental desire for consideration from others. When someone cuts us off without signaling, they're breaking an unspoken social contract that prioritizes collective safety and predictability.
We tackle the awkward conversations nobody wants to have – like addressing hygiene issues in the workplace or enforcing dress codes without crossing lines. How do you tell a coworker they need to shower more frequently? Is there a tactful way to suggest someone's outfit might be inappropriate for the office? The hosts share their real-world experiences navigating these delicate situations with empathy while still maintaining necessary boundaries.
The discussion expands to modern irritations in our digital world – from delayed text responses when we know someone is glued to their phone, to people walking across streets while texting, endangering themselves and others. These behaviors trigger our frustration because they represent a perceived devaluation of human connection and safety.
Take a moment to reflect on your own pet peeves as you listen. What might they reveal about your values? Perhaps they're not random sensitivities but meaningful indicators of what matters most to you in your interactions with others. By understanding the psychology behind our irritations, we gain valuable insights into ourselves and the implicit expectations that help society function smoothly.
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Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth
DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.
Hey everyone, welcome to All About the Joy. This is the private lounge. We have Cynthia in the house, rick Costa's in the house. How you guys doing what's up? So today we're going to talk about a subject. I think we touched on this before on one of our lives. We talked about pet peeves and I really want to talk about it because I want to think about what it says about us. About what it says about us. So I think it could be both a positive and a negative. So first I wanted to see what you guys thought. Maybe the definition of pet peeves are for you.
Cynthia:I guess something that just annoys you, that you know kind of is like a tick or something that just triggers you type of thing. I've got plenty of those.
Carmen Lezeth :Right, yeah, it's something that a particular person finds especially annoying or frustrating. It might be something big or small, but it's not like something general that everyone, that it bothers everyone. I mean, rick, would you kind of agree with that? Yeah?
Rick Costa:To me. I would say it's something that is annoying to you, but the root of it is in consideration on the other person's part.
Carmen Lezeth :Oh, you made that all like that. Yeah, it's the other person's fault, right? I think one of my big we've talked about this. I cannot stand people who don't use directionals. I can't stand it. Think one of my big we've talked about this. I cannot stand people who don't use directionals. I can't stand it. Uh, when you're driving in some places they're called blinkers right blinkers in in connecticut. What do you guys call them?
Rick Costa:turn signal, I think turn signals right.
Carmen Lezeth :So I have gotten so frustrated and I just want to apologize in case this person is ever watching this show. I don't know who you are, but you were driving a Lambo. Is that what they're called the Lamborghinis? Is that what a Lambo, 21 years old, that's in mint condition. And I went to the stop sign and they were like here and I, and that's a red light, the red light. And I went and I rolled down my window, cause I had that window open and I was like, does your car not come with a direction? They couldn't hear me, but I was like, and they didn't hear, they could care less, like, and I realized like that's bad, like that's road rage, but I was so annoyed. Is that what the Lamborghinis are called? Lambos?
Rick Costa:Yeah.
Carmen Lezeth :Oh, they are Okay. But I said it with attitude and angry, but they didn't hear me. But they also probably heard me and just ignored me, because why would you respond to me? Do you know what I mean? But I felt they knew that what they did was wrong. I'm just going to say yeah.
Cynthia:Oh yeah, oh yeah. I'm the same way Today. Actually, as I'm driving home, I'm thinking about like the pet peeves and I said, oh yeah, this is one of them, people not using their blinkers, cutting in front of me, and of course they can't hear me in my car and I'm cussing them out. And, juan's, like you think you have road rage?
Carmen Lezeth :Oh, my God, oh, he's in the car with you. Yeah, whenever I'm driving he's in the car. You know what's so ghetto about me? If somebody's in the car with me, especially one of my god daughters or something I'm so composed like, all the rage is inside. I'm totally that person like in the car, I'm totally happy and joyful, but inside, dying, I would never wow.
Rick Costa:Okay, you have the same road rage thing I do oh yeah, I think my son may have said something to the same effect once or twice in the past before. Like Dad, you're really angry. I'm like because it's stupid.
Carmen Lezeth :You know what would be great though I know this sounds weird I've always wanted to have a little sign Like is your blinker broken? No, you're so bad, no, but just a sign that you could just put up or whatever. Or you could press a button and it could come out of your car and be like a flag or something and say is your blinker broken, or something. I just don't understand why. Well, okay, so this is what I think it says about me. Clearly I have issues with road rage, I think no, but I. I think it says about me. Um, clearly I have issues with road rage, I think no, but I. I do think it's about consideration.
Carmen Lezeth :That was one of the things I wrote was I don't like people who aren't, because people who are doing that are not thinking about the people behind them, right? They're not being considerate that other people don't know where they're going. And when we don't know where you're going, we're assuming you're going to go straight and so we're going to behave that way. And then somebody else would be like well, you're supposed to be one car behind. I am, I am. That's not the point, you know.
Cynthia:And this week all the school, college schools are moving in, so of course you have people from other states and it's like dude, if you're going to move into this state, use your blinkers. Know the rules of Boston.
Carmen Lezeth :You know what I mean. Boston is crazy. Drive is like LA. True but true, but still use your blinker right, exactly.
Rick Costa:You know, what always makes me madder is not that they didn't use their blinker at all. It's when they slow down. They're already starting to turn, and then they turn on their blinks.
Cynthia:They already knew.
Rick Costa:That pissed me off even more.
Carmen Lezeth :They're already in the turn, they're already almost there, and then they put on the blinker. That one's a good one. It's hilarious, yeah. What other pet peeves do you guys have?
Cynthia:Oh, I hate the sound of people chewing. Do you really? It's really? Oh my God.
Carmen Lezeth :Wait, so that's not an ASMRmr thing you want to listen to wow, I didn't know that.
Carmen Lezeth :It really bothers me, yeah so what do you think it says about you? I know people who haven't seen our episode where we did asmr for like the whole hour, all all three of us. It was so random, it was one of our Friday night lives. It was very funny actually, right, yeah, what do you think it says about you? That I have anger issues? No, no, it probably means that, like you don't like kind of ambient noises like that.
Cynthia:Yeah, there's certain noises that really bother me, like very, very high-pitched noises bother me, like alarms, like a fire alarm. That really bugs me. Okay, that's supposed to bug you. Well, yeah, I know, I know it is, but there's certain ones that are just really, really high pitch and it really hurts my ears, but chewing sounds.
Carmen Lezeth :Sounds is interesting, because how do you get around that when you're at dinner with somebody?
Cynthia:Yeah, you just kind of your face yeah Hard.
Carmen Lezeth :Is it anybody chewing, or certain like people who, like you know, do the chewing thing very loudly, very loudly, or is it just chewing?
Rick Costa:Very loudly yeah.
Cynthia:There's another person that, like they chew with their mouth closed, but it's almost like you can hear the teeth hitting each other and it's like why are you chewing like that? Wow.
Carmen Lezeth :Is the food that hard? Wow, I've never. I mean, I know there are people who don't like that, but okay. But Rick, what were you going to say?
Rick Costa:I think this is more like an old movie thing, but there used to be like characters would be like chewing gum Hang, hang a gun, don't want you to die.
Carmen Lezeth :Look at Cynthia's dying dying.
Cynthia:That's annoying.
Carmen Lezeth :You know, there's so much ASMR videos and stuff on YouTube and TikTok where that's all they're doing. They're like licking their lips, really.
Cynthia:She just keeps swiping. I know someone else who eats fruit and they're always like and I went.
Carmen Lezeth :I wonder, what that means. Right like I wonder, because I don't know, it's just okay, but wait, I have something similar, rick, we're gonna get you in a second, that's what? But just because we're the same thing, I don't like when people are typing too loud or their phones like, and to me it's like. I don't like noise pollution. I don't know if that's a thing, but I don't like. I like it quiet. So I wonder if there's something similar there.
Rick Costa:But I don't like clickety clackety keyboards, like when my boss gave me the last computer I was like, oh no, got rid of it.
Cynthia:I hate that, it's just annoying what about the when they have the long nails and they're typing no? I hate that, it's just annoying. What about the typewriters?
Carmen Lezeth :When they have the long nails and they're typing.
Carmen Lezeth :Oh, I don't get the long nails thing and typing and I don't know who said wiping their ass. One time I was like it's too much information. But now, whenever I see somebody with long nails it doesn't matter who it is, celebrity, anything I'm like it's the. It's the only thing that comes to my head, like that must hurt. Or you're not wiping fully, or maybe you have a bidet. I don't know. You must have a bidet Because you can't. You know, like Cynthia Erivovo, who we all love, her nails are longer than she is tall. I mean, she's like a little thing and her nails are like clam, clam, clam. You know, um, but yeah, oh.
Rick Costa:So you don't like an old school typewriter, though, rick that's like a vintage thing, yeah, like that's almost on purpose. So that was almost. That would just take me back. I wouldn't be annoyed, unless I had it here every day. Then I'd be like, okay, it's giving me a headache, where's my aspirin?
Carmen Lezeth :Okay, what other pet peeve do you have?
Rick Costa:People that can't clean a bus to themselves. I can like their normal house and their mother works there. You expect me to clean your mess?
Carmen Lezeth :No, but you don't just tell them, I tell them.
Rick Costa:I guess it depends on my relationship with them.
Carmen Lezeth :Let me be very clear. If you are ever invited to my home, you will pick up after your damn self, because I am not your maid. I'll tell you to your face I don't care, that's where I'm mean, or whatever. Do you know what I mean? What do you think it says about you?
Cynthia:He's a neat freak.
Carmen Lezeth :I don't know. I don't know if you're.
Rick Costa:Are you a?
Carmen Lezeth :neat freak.
Rick Costa:I wouldn't say that.
Carmen Lezeth :No, I think it's what you said earlier. I think all these things come down to maybe some type of being considerate, you know. So the thing that I was researching a little bit I didn't do a lot of research on it, but it's micro truths that come out right. There are things that we learn about ourselves, and here's the thing Do you ever do the same pet peeve that annoys you? Do you actually do it as well, is the next question or do you have any things that you do that other people might consider a pet peeve? So I use my directional all the time. I'm just going to say straight up all the time, whatever.
Carmen Lezeth :However, I do sometimes, like all humans, make mistakes when I'm driving. So I love that. Most people think they're like everyone thinks they're the best driver on the planet, and I'm the complete opposite. Like I am going to drive the actual speed limit. I am not good. Like I might go five above or five under or whatever, but I'm not going to go 85 just because that's how the traffic's going, and I know that annoys people, but I don't love to drive. I'm a careful driver. The speed limit says 75, used to be 65. Now you're all going 85, 90. I don't understand, so I know I can see.
Cynthia:Something is like uh-huh I know, but you keep the one behind you, like oh.
Carmen Lezeth :They're going at me right, because I'm never going to be in that left lane over to the, you know, the one that Terry K always talks about. Don't be in this. The what's the, that's the lane he's in the travel lane.
Carmen Lezeth :No, no, but he calls it the ticket money lane because you got ticket money. What? No, no, but he calls it the ticket money lane because you got ticket money. What was great about him when he did that? He's the. He's an influencer on TikTok Police officers. This was before ICE, everyone before ICE. But the police officers came out and you know and did, they did stitches with him on TikTok and they were laughing.
Terry Kaye (Influencer) :I thought this was common knowledge, but obviously not. So let me teach some of y'all. The left lane, also known as the fast lane, it's for people who have ticket money. It's for people who have ticket money. If you are going to follow the rules, follow the laws as you should. That middle lane is reserved just for you. It's yours. If you are scared, if you're going to tiptoe, if you are hesitant, that far right lane is just for you. Nobody else wants to be over there. That is your area. But by golly gee, do not get over in that far left lane, also known as the fast lane, tiptoe, because we're trying to him. We have ticket money and even if we don't have ticket money, look, that's our burden to bear. Don't get over here holding us up because you scared. Now, middle lane if you're going to follow the rules. Far right lane. If you're scared, left lane, look your back.
Carmen Lezeth :They're like yeah, don't be in the ticket because we're going to get you. So if you don't have ticket money, don't be in the because we're gonna get you. So if you don't have ticket money, don't be in that fast lane. So I I use my directional all the time, but I do go the speed limit.
Rick Costa:Fight me and I actually stop at stop signs. Fight me, yeah, I do in california.
Carmen Lezeth :That's against the law. It has to be a rolling stop sign. I'm kidding, Nobody stops it. I mean we stop it Like, we kind of stop, Like we stop, but we're still rolling. You don't pause. It's a rolling stop sign. It's just. You know, everyone kind of does it. It's kind of the lie air, but you guys stop at your stop signs. Oh my God, this is so boring but kind of funny conversation.
Rick Costa:One thing I will say, though, about the blinkers is maybe the only time I won't do.
Carmen Lezeth :It is if you are in a lane and there's only you can only turn one certain way. I think you should use it all the time, because I think that's where you make the mistake. If I'm coming out of the parking lot and there's only one way to go, it's habit. I'm not even thinking about it and I think the problem is people pick and choose when to use it. But if you just use it all the time, you're never going to not use it.
Cynthia:But I think that's come naturally to you at that point.
Carmen Lezeth :I'm sure the person in the Lamborghini was like ah, it's just a Honda, she's going to make sure she knows where she is around me. No big deal, I won't use it. I think if you start making excuses about it, that's what we get in trouble. Any other pet peeves?
Cynthia:My old coworker, the one that got laid off. She used to burp like a truck driver. That's just bad manners. It's like, okay, everybody burped. You know what I mean. But there's also a little discreet way to do it. Sometimes you might let out a burping. Maybe she has a problem. She had a problem, all right, I bet you she watches our show. Just kidding, but she used to do it constantly and so loud and it was just like at some point it was just like okay, you know, you're doing it, you know.
Carmen Lezeth :I just think people don't have manners and etiquette. I think that's what it is right Like, or people get too comfortable.
Cynthia:Yeah, yeah, I made the one thing. You can do it around you know, family, friends, whatever you know but it's like you're doing it at work, I know, but I think she probably has a problem.
Carmen Lezeth :I'm not defending her. I'm like that's kind of embarrassing, that's like farting or whatever, like pretending you're not. You know what I mean. Like you know, I don't know if you ate something bad. Okay, this is going down a really bad way, I don't know whatever okay, rick, share with us your bodily issues.
Rick Costa:I'm just kidding well, I was gonna say I know some people they do have a problem and they almost can't help it.
Carmen Lezeth :But if you always stink, I don't think people know they have a problem?
Rick Costa:no, you generally don't.
Carmen Lezeth :But uh, like, I don't know, like, if you have to take a shower a few times a day, then do what you gotta do but people don't know, okay, the reason why I bring this up, because somebody came to me in one of the offices I worked in, I'm just gonna say, in the last few months, and they said that one of the other co-workers stinks all the time. I was like really, I never smell him. And they were like no, because you're not around him. We work with him all the time. And I'm like I don't think so. He's given me a hug before whatever. And then I'm like maybe an eye stick, maybe they're trying to tell me something.
Rick Costa:The smells are combating each other.
Carmen Lezeth :I was like wait a minute, I was freaking out. But then I realized, because I made it a point to like stand next to him in the kitchen or whatever, and I was like, oh, I see what they're saying. Now I smell what they're saying now I was like I don't know how to tiptoe on that one. I don't know how to deal with that one, like I don't know. And they were coming to me like can you take care of it? I'm like let me see my contract.
Rick Costa:You had a hygiene tweet.
Cynthia:I don't know. That's part of my job description.
Carmen Lezeth :I know I'm here to fix problems, but that's a weird one. But, I started thinking about it. I've have conversations, like I've had conversations with women and men regarding dress attire. Like we've had some women in the couple and I'll say in the past few years where they've gone into, like they've come in to start a job and they're dressed in a way that is probably not. It's like it's like walking on eggs. Basically too much cleavage, too much ass, like just too much. You know what I mean.
Rick Costa:Like too much tightness. It's an office, not a club.
Carmen Lezeth :Right, and here's the thing you have to be very careful because you can't you know what I mean. Like, people have the right to dress however they want, and but not in our office. There is a dress code and we have it as part of our handbook that there is a dress code a lot of places. Don't you know what I mean? But it's still something. You have to be careful because everybody has their own style, and I have to say, like one woman that we had a conversation with and I say we because I had somebody else in the room with me right, there's a way you do it. You don't do it by yourself or whatever, you know.
Carmen Lezeth :Um, she fabulous, if she was going to a club, you know what I mean like she was going out, you know like, she just like, but there was no need. You know, now I can't tell her not to wear. She was wearing like stilettos every day to work, like just, but you, I can't, you do you. That's fine, whatever, but the cleavage down to here. You know what I mean. And so it was so difficult to have the conversation, but then she was like no, I get it, I get it, I'll do it.
Carmen Lezeth :She was totally cool about it, because she wanted a job so badly. You know what I mean. She had already gotten a job and she wanted to keep it. And I said here's the thing. You should be able to wear whatever you want. Whatever you want to wear should be the way it is, unfortunately, because we live in a country full of crazy people. So I turned around I said we need to be more aware of how we dress so that we don't have to deal with the crazy people. You know what I mean and I'm so good at my job like, because it's true and but she was also very receptive, like I was lucky one of the men that came in.
Carmen Lezeth :He was just wearing half shirts and he was like it's like, but I just came from the gym. Well, we don't, I get it. But I was like no, you have to wear. She's like no, but I have. I said not a. Well, we don't, I get it. But I was like no, you have to wear shades, like no, but I have.
Carmen Lezeth :I said not a half shirt. No, I don't need to see your belly, like we need to, you need to clean up or something Like just, you have to have consideration. Going back to that word, people in the office, you know, if you don't have time to take a shower and get dressed or whatever, then you need to change the time you go work out because you need to be here at work. Is your gym paying your bill or are we paying your bills? I'm just trying to figure it out, because he had a little bit of an attitude and I was ready to be like that's all right, it's warning number one and we're going to fire your ass because you're not that great anyways, motherfucker, that was all deep down inside.
Cynthia:I. That was all deep down inside. I hope you're not watching the show. Speaking on how to dress at work, I remember people coming in for an interview and wearing flip-flops and I'm like really, but what's your job?
Carmen Lezeth :Where are they working in At a?
Cynthia:hospital. Well, you can't wear open-toed shoes at all, right? You know what I mean. You're dealing with patients, you're dealing with medicines or whatever Like they're sharp objects, and you're wearing flip-flops to an injury.
Carmen Lezeth :Can you say my feet smell? No, I'm just kidding, yeah, yeah, I mean, oh God, those are just bad fashion Cause they're ugly. Okay, um, no, but it's in the handbook. Like, I think the mistake people make is that people usually just take any and I'm not a hospital wouldn't do this but they'll. You know, people start a business and they'll just pull any random handbook off the internet to start their business or whatever, and they won't really read it and they won't really talk to a lawyer about it and you act.
Carmen Lezeth :I mean, if you're having an at-home, remote job or it's different, but if you have an in office and you're hiring people, you need to make sure you cover all the bases. You know, now, I can't tell someone you're dressing too sexy, see, I can't say that because that's not, that's not objective and you know people may think me wearing a gap t-shirt is sexy. I don't know. Ooh, carmen, that wrinkled neckline. That's why you can't say something like that. You have to be very objective about it, you know.
Carmen Lezeth :But if you have it in the handbook and if you can put it towards the idea that, like we, we need to be able to be considerate of everyone in the office, you know, and this needs to be a place like as much as I love your outfit for the club where everyone be like hey, who's that here? We need to be like hey. We need to just work together and not be worried about the flashiness of it all. She still kept wearing her heels though. Hey, go ahead. Is there a day when you won't be able to still knock that shit out?
Carmen Lezeth :I know because I used to wear them all the time. I never wore heels like that, though Three or four inches was enough for me.
Rick Costa:This is actually an issue that comes up not to be religious, but in church too. It's like girl if you bend over a little bit, something might pop out. What are you doing? You're in church, really.
Carmen Lezeth :You're loving the Lord. What are you doing? Do you tell people in church they can't wear something?
Rick Costa:If it's like a woman, they'll have a woman like an older woman say something. Or if it's a man, I don't want to be the man really.
Carmen Lezeth :So it usually would be like a young person wearing something out of line probably right.
Terry Kaye (Influencer) :That's funny.
Carmen Lezeth :It's always the young kids who don't understand. Yeah, so I never did go and talk to that person about them smelling, but I did have. Well, first of all, I didn't know he smelled, so I don't work with him. So I don't care, not my department, but um, but I did talk to the group of men who worked with him and said you know what, maybe you could do it one of two ways. The first way is to talk about your own showering habits. I don't mean like so, guys, what do you do when you shower? I don't mean like that, just be like God. I missed my shower this morning. Do I smell? I shower every morning without fail. You know what I mean. You do it like that.
Rick Costa:I just got a new body wash that smells so, so good. Have you ever tried this body wash?
Carmen Lezeth :exactly, yeah, that's how you do it, so that's how I told them all to go about it to be make it more about what we all, because some people just don't know.
Rick Costa:Yeah, you know, I at first one. Make sure it wasn't me it wasn't me.
Carmen Lezeth :Okay, you know it's him everybody. You know it's him.
Rick Costa:Go ahead I had a friend, that very large person, say that way and, yes, they did kind of have this issue and so somebody thought I'm gonna give him a big hint and be anonymous about it and they gift wrapped and when he opened that up he was heated that's not nice I was like that's what I'm saying. It wasn't me. He was heated.
Carmen Lezeth :I was like, oh, that's that's mean but also, I mean, first of all, it was a bad way to do it, but secondly, they probably still got the point. And I think when you're bigger and look, it's not even bigger. I have, as I've gotten older, some areas that flap over that never flapped over before my poor boobs. So you know you sweat a little bit, you gotta wipe a little bit and you know you gotta do some damage. But that's how I would approach that, right, I would go up to that person and and make it about I. But that's how I would approach that, right, I would go up to that person and make it about I think that's the thing is that the best way to help other people, especially when it's an embarrassing thing, is to make it about you.
Carmen Lezeth :But that requires empathy and we lack that in this country. I don't know if it's just this country, but this society. We are so divorced of having empathy and sympathy that we don't seem to be able to do it. We just get mad at other people in a Lamborghini. We don't think that maybe they were just having a bad day and they forgot, and maybe it's not really their Lamborghini. You know what dawned on me too. I was like because I work with so many people that own a lot of these stupid cars and I was like they don't drive them. Their maintenance people will drive them or bring them. Or I'm like what if it wasn't?
Cynthia:You know what I?
Carmen Lezeth :mean. And then I'm like you know what? Now I feel better about it. It's okay, go ahead, enjoy your fun drive. I don't know, but just being more empathetic and sympathetic about things I think would make it easier.
Rick Costa:One that's for me. If you use the last bit of toilet paper and you don't put the new roll in, it's going to be me and you. It's right there, You're not going to know it was me.
Carmen Lezeth :You're not going to know it was me.
Rick Costa:I hate that.
Carmen Lezeth :Okay, but do you do the toilet paper up or down?
Rick Costa:I had a feeling you were going to say that.
Carmen Lezeth :Because there's only one right way to do it.
Rick Costa:There was a whole episode about that.
Carmen Lezeth :It's over.
Rick Costa:Yeah, I do over.
Carmen Lezeth :Why do didn't do it? There was a whole show about that it's over.
Cynthia:Yeah, I do over.
Carmen Lezeth :Why do people do it under? That don't even make no sense. It doesn't whatever okay, very weird.
Cynthia:All right, another pet peeve of mine. Hey, um, cars that have sound systems that are just way too loud. People are sitting in the car. You cannot even hear the song. All you hear or feel actually is boom, boom, boom. You can't even enjoy the song I don't get that Okay.
Carmen Lezeth :So I'm going to say something. Okay, I agree with you. I agree with you. However, I have my old Honda Civic Hybrid and I don't have a new stereo system in it at all, whatever. But I remember when I lived on 21st Street. I think you came to my apartment when I lived on 21st Street I would always I had my own garage. That was the kind of cool part of that apartment complexes, it's like that was like a whole other. You can have a whole other apartment in there.
Carmen Lezeth :I didn't realize that when I pulled in and I had my music blaring or whatever, because I felt like I have my windows up, no one can hear it Like. My neighbors came down one day. They were like Carmen, we love you, we think you're a great person. I was like what happened? What? Like I thought they were going to give me a gift or something. I'm like. They're like, can you please stop listening to your music so loud in your car and then drive into the? I'm like. I had no idea. They're like I said, but the windows are up. They're like carmen, it's like you're in our living room. We can hear it. It's like a. Then the husband was like you bought a new, like a new surround system or something for your car, right? But all they hear is the boom, boom, boom, like, oh my god, old school, I shouldn't say that because people will try to steal it, but it is pretty loud so I don't do that anymore. I don't have it loud anymore, but I didn't know, wow.
Cynthia:Yeah, but see, you didn't know. These other people know They've got all the windows down and they're doing it on purpose. Oh yeah, no yeah. Like I was on the bus the other day and you could feel it through the bus, I was like, yeah, that's just way too much.
Carmen Lezeth :Unless it's a good song that I agree with and I'm okay with it.
Rick Costa:That's my problem. If this is like, this is my jam. If I can't hear myself singing, it's not loud enough.
Carmen Lezeth :I walked across the street the other day and somebody had their music up. What were they playing? I can't remember. Oh, did a little boo thing. I walked across like dancing. I was such a dork. I'm sure other people didn't appreciate it, but I was like that's a good sound Cause I got a bounce to it, you know.
Cynthia:Yeah.
Carmen Lezeth :I agree with you and people do. Yeah, it's too much, especially when people have it, you know. They clearly have bought a new stereo system so that everyone can hear the music they listen to. And how come it's never someone who listens to like classical or orchestra, you know what I mean. It's always like hard rock or rap or heavy metal. It's always something I don't want to listen to. So true, I'm sorry that's so true.
Rick Costa:I'm sorry. What about people that take forever to respond back to a text or email, when you know they are always on their phone? They're ghosting you with them. They're always on the phone.
Terry Kaye (Influencer) :I didn't see it bro, you was, I'm with you. You were always on your phone, which means you didn't see it right?
Carmen Lezeth :yeah, but people have different. I mean, I don't know, I shouldn't say what people do, but I have different chimes and different rings for everybody, so if I hear a certain one, I can wait. I guess that's not nice.
Cynthia:I know the reason why she doesn't respond.
Carmen Lezeth :I respond to everyone's texts at minimum within 24 hours, but I always. When have you ever waited for me to respond to your texts? Oh, never, never, I respond, Rick. Have you ever texted me and I not responded?
Rick Costa:Always.
Carmen Lezeth :Always, I always. Yeah, I'm, I don't know why people, you know people like oh my God, I get so many emails. That's why I didn't get back to you, shut the fuck up. I've had five or six clients at one time, staff offices of like 20 and 30 in each office people emailing me. You know what? I still get to my emails when my friends email me. But that's just me, you do, you. I have a system, though I don't think people because I'm ridiculously organized, but you know, from like 8am to four o'clock I do business emails and then anything after that is personal. So I close that off. I don't have emails mixing in. You know what I mean. So for me it's really easy. So that's why I always get back to my friends or whatever so, and I only do an hour each, like morning, and then hour at night and get back to emails, okay, so you all know my trick now.
Rick Costa:So there, it is why I think dios what if you're like in a doctor's office right, you're surrounded by strangers. You don't know any of these people. You're maybe already a little bit agitated and you hear what's that? Exactly somebody doing that. It's like, oh my god, please, for the love of god, stop. But it's a stranger. So it's like what do you do?
Carmen Lezeth :okay, wait, that really bothers you the sighing who does that?
Carmen Lezeth :do I do, that do I do that I do that sometimes yeah, rick does the sighing and I was like, and then I'm like is that what jesus would do? Is that what jesus would do? That's what that's always my rebuttal. Is that how Jesus would react? I don't know if tapping bothers me. I mean, I guess it depends on where I'm at. Like I told you, when I'm in an office, in an intimate office, like there's three of us sharing a shoebox and somebody's you know phone is ringing and they're texting and you can hear it click, click, Like I don't I text without the clicking. Like I don't I text without the clicking like I don't understand why you would do that.
Carmen Lezeth :It drives me insane. And then they get upset with me because I asked them to turn off the sound. Like I hate when you're here, I'm like, okay, well, I'm gonna still be here, so turn off your fucking phone, I don't care. Yeah, I don't care. Yeah, those are my things I don't know. I don't know. I think if it's a stranger and it's really bothering me, I might be cute about it. I tell people. I know I'm bad, I'm blunt.
Cynthia:My thing is early in the morning. Why do people feel the need to have a virtual or FaceTime and talk so loud?
Carmen Lezeth :Wait, I don't know what you're talking about.
Cynthia:Who's doing that? People waiting for the shuttle or on the bus or walking anywhere, and they're talking so loud in their FaceTime. It's 7am. Who the hell are you talking to? Shouldn't they be at work too?
Carmen Lezeth :Maybe somebody in another country, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I know, I don't know, I don't walk. So there are things I don't do that other people do, that I still. I don't even think it's about coordination. I just think I don't think people have learned how not to use their phones all the time. We always talk about kids. It's not kids, it's adults who have the problem. The problem. I see people walking across the street. I'll be in my car and they're. They haven't even looked up, they're stepping off the curb and they're still texting. And in my head I'm like I just don't trust car. I don't trust other people so much that I'm gonna be okay with you, hoping that you're gonna stop your car so that I can walk gracefully across the street. Like I don't trust nobody.
Cynthia:Like today I'm coming home and this girl is literally on the bus talking really loud on her phone to a credit card company about some charges that were on her phone, and then she's saying her credit card number out loud. Are you an idiot? These are personal calls.
Carmen Lezeth :There are no rules on the see, because when I used to take the bus and the trolling stuff, you didn't, we didn't have phones. Oh my god, there's no rules that you can like in restaurants. You can't have your phone on. You know what I mean. Like no, there's no rules. Oh see, but again, it's consideration. Yeah, but you're expecting people need rules then right, so I'm just saying this is one of those moments where I would personally send a letter to the mayor and to the mbta or whatever it's. What's it called in in massachusetts?
Cynthia:no, it wasn't even the regular t, it was our shuttle bus, the employee shuttle, oh, that's even worse.
Carmen Lezeth :Well, you should talk to. I thought you meant like public transportation, no, it was our employee shuttle.
Cynthia:It's like you have a bus full of people and you're saying your credit card number.
Carmen Lezeth :I'll allow you really trust these employees why don't you, just why don't you send the? You know what? You send them the link to the show. This is a problem, seriously. I mean, I thought you were talking about the regular tea, I'm like that. I think there were rules. You can't do that. I don't know. I haven't been on a on a. I haven't been in a in a long time, even in a place where normally people don't talk loud, in a bus in a long time.
Rick Costa:Even in a place where normally people don't talk loud, and I don't mean a library, that's obvious, but like a grocery store, for example, Like I don't need to hear that.
Carmen Lezeth :You know what Restaurant people do that, that I am. Don't be in the grocery store with me and be in line and get mad at the cashier because your ass is on the phone and you didn't hear her when she said 42, whatever. And then I have told like I cannot tell you. I almost wait for it. I get in line just to wait to see who the motherfucker is that's going to do this shit. I will defend the cash cashier. That drives me insane.
Carmen Lezeth :I tend to use my phone in the grocery store, not to be on the phone, but because I use my coupons with my phone. But I think, being on the, I don't. People try to multitask and people there's no such thing as multitasking. Everyone thinks they can multitask, but that's not how the brain works and what you're doing is everything half-assed at the same time. That's what you're doing instead of focusing on one thing. But I do think one of the things that we can take away from this is consideration, empathy, sympathy and just trying to be more considerate of other people, because you're annoying Cynthia with your chewing.
Carmen Lezeth :Hey everyone, thank you for stopping by. Remember we have our Friday night shows at 6 pm Pacific, 9 pm Eastern. We also have our Thursday night shows, 6 pm, called Culture and Consequence. So check out that show, but beware, it's heavy on politics. Anyways, remember, at the end of the day it really is all about the joy and we'll see you next time. Bye everyone, bye. Thanks for stopping by. All About the Joy. Be better and stay beautiful folks. Have a sweet day.
