All About The Joy

Gen Z, Big Decisions, and the Myth of the ‘Right Path’

• Carmen Lezeth Suarez • Episode 250

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What if the “right path” isn’t a single lane but a series of smart experiments? Carmen sits down with Juliana, her 17‑year‑old goddaughter, for a candid Gen X–Gen Z conversation about big choices, bigger pressures, and the real work of growing into your own voice. It’s equal parts heart and homework: career dreams, changing majors, family expectations, and how to support teens without smothering them.

We dig into what post‑high school planning actually feels like - four possible routes, clear ambitions, and the fear of picking wrong. Carmen shares how winding roads are normal, even strategic, when you stack skills and let experience refine your goals. Juliana keeps it real about why money matters, how saving builds confidence, and the bittersweet truth that some dream jobs (hello, teaching) don’t pay like they should. Along the way we talk resilience - learning from a tough swim season, naming hidden strengths like karate and skiing, and shifting from comparison to growth.

There’s a message here for parents and mentors: advice lands better when it maps pros and cons, respects autonomy, and focuses on capability over control. We unpack generational differences around work and safety, practical ways to try paths without getting stuck, and the quiet power of giving space after conflict so relationships can reset. If you’re navigating the leap from high school to what’s next - or guiding someone who is - you’ll find a grounded, hopeful playbook: choose a next step, iterate fast, save smart, and keep joy in the loop.

If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who’s choosing their next step, and leave a quick review to help others find the conversation. Your stories and takeaways keep this community strong.

Thank you for stopping by. Please visit our website: All About The Joy and add, like and share. You can also support us by shopping at our STORE - We'd appreciate that greatly. Also, if you want to find us anywhere on social media, please check out the link in bio page.

Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth


DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.

Carmen Lezeth:

Hey everyone, welcome to All About the Joy. This is the Private Lounge. I'm Carmen Lisa, your host. And this is the aforementioned, is that how you say it? I think so. I don't even know. The love of my life. Is that good? Is that embarrassing you? Okay, like my goddaughter. Oh, wait. Juliana. Juliana's in the house. Hi, Julie. How are you doing? I'm good. How are you? We have to tell people what that is. You taught me. Okay, I'll tell them later.

Julie:

Oh, you do it with me. I painted my nails for you, so I can do this.

Carmen Lezeth:

Well, I didn't paint my nails. So just so you know, it might seem like can you see me okay? It might be a little blurry or whatever, but I'm using a new system. So I don't know. I don't know. We're just testing it out. I know. You're you're on your are you on your iPad or your computer? My mom's computer. Oh, totally cool. Look at you're all smiley. Are you nervous? Yeah. Okay, so let's just say that we hung out the other day. We had you you took me to lunch for my birthday, and we were at the beach and we were chatting, and then I asked you if you would come on the show, and you said yes. And so I wanted to ask you some questions as the representative of all Gen Z in the world to talk to Gen X.

unknown:

Okay.

Carmen Lezeth:

I'm gonna represent all of Gen X. You're gonna represent all of Gen Z. Okay. So, but we were talking about like making plans because you were 17. I can't believe you're 17. That's just not gonna make some sense. I'm sorry. Well, I couldn't believe like because when we were hanging out, wasn't it like I felt like we haven't seen each other in a while? Yeah, but I felt like it was like there was no time that passed between us, wasn't it? Just fun.

Julie:

And that's what happens every time.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah. Why is it like why do you think that happens? I think okay, how many times did I say remember when we were little? Oh my god, I'm such an idiot. I'm in denial. Oh my god.

Julie:

But why do you think it is? I think we just we just click. So when it you always say it's the quality, not the quantity. So I think whenever we see each other, we do have that quality.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, that's true. I didn't think about that, but you're absolutely right. But it was kind of like, and it's so weird because you and I have disagreements about a lot of things, but it's almost like it's not even that we're avoiding those conversations, it's like we can have those conversations, and then we get right into the jam of the fun stuff, which is like the silly, girly. I kind of love that. And I think it's because I'm not your parent. I mean, I think that's part of it, is that I've always been like the auntie, you know, that's the benefits. So I wanted to talk about one thing specifically because you're in this space right now where you have to make all these plans for your future. And I wanted to know what is like I'm gonna ask you some questions and you can answer. And anything you don't want to answer, I'll just delete. So don't worry about it. Yeah. What has been the hardest thing for you about this time in your life? You're about to graduate from high school and you have all of these choices in front of you. What do you think has been the hardest part for you during this time period?

Julie:

Okay, so I think for sure it's been what my steps are directly out of high school because I have a very good idea of what I want to do. Like I know what career and like how I've envisioned my future, but the problem that I've been struggling with is coming out of high school. Where am I gonna go? What am I gonna do? You know that I have multiple plans, and so deciding which one to actually stand by, I haven't even done that yet.

Carmen Lezeth:

Right. And I'm I'm laughing because you have I'm gonna say four. Four ideas. Okay, well, we're not gonna discuss what the plans are because I don't want to get in the middle with her and her parents about nothing. I ain't even touching that with a 10-foot pole. But my whole deal was my whole thing was the reason why this came up is because I kept saying to you, like I kept kind of laughing because you have these exact plans of how it's gonna happen. Whatever those three, yeah, I'm gonna say full. Because I'm still hoping for the one that I want her to do to happen. But I'm just saying, like, you have a concrete idea of how, and and and if you choose A, it's gonna be do do do do. And I was like, like, because it never works out, but you know I wasn't laughing at you.

Julie:

No, I know, but yeah, it's like I know what I want and I'm gonna get it. Just need to know how to start.

Carmen Lezeth:

Well, okay, so what is the worst thing that adults are doing besides laughing at you when you're trying to make decisions? But like, what's one of the worst things that maybe not just your parents, but I assume you're talking to counselors and all these other people, advisors or whatever. But even me, I mean, I haven't really this was our first time really talking about your plans with each other without anyone else involved. And I support whatever you want to do 100%, even if two of those ideas I don't love. You know what I mean? You know what I mean. But what's the worst thing that adults are doing?

Julie:

I don't know, just like instead of trying to be like encouraging, they'll say like all the negatives, and I feel like something you're good at is saying like both sides, like you will see the good and the bad from everything. But a lot of the people I've talked to are just like, no, this is bad, and I don't think you should do that. But this on the other hand, like this other option that you have is good, and that I like more, but like it's me, not you.

Carmen Lezeth:

It's like I'll tell you what I would rather you do, but I'm not gonna tell you not to do the thing that you want to do. Yeah, right, and I'll support whatever it is you choose to do, even if I hate it. And you know which you you know how I feel about like I think something adults do that I see them do, I mean, it's because I'm not a parent, right? I'm not 24-7 with you. Is that your mama there? Is it just it is she knows she's behind the door, she wants to listen in on our conversation. I think she's walking away. Oh no, she's here. Come here. Just come and say how she's gonna because she doesn't want to be on camera, probably.

Julie:

Yeah, she's sold her PJs.

Carmen Lezeth:

That's all right, that's okay. But I think one of the things I watch adults do, not just to you, but to other kids, is imposing what they want you to do, yes, and at the same time negating what you want to do. Is that fair? Yeah, that's what I think. What is something you're looking forward to after high school? Whatever choice you make working. Well, you're working now, which is kind of cool.

Julie:

But I'm because I mean, like, if we're talking directly out of high school, I'm already planning on working like full time, and I don't know why. I'm just like excited for that.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, because you like working.

Julie:

I do.

Carmen Lezeth:

But yeah. I'm just gonna warn you that will end soon.

Julie:

Like, I know when the first two weeks I was working, I was like, I love this, I want to work forever. But then now it's like, I don't know, but I'm still excited because that'll kind of give me a glimpse into the future. Right.

Carmen Lezeth:

But you were talking about, and I love this, like you have your money, you're saving your money, you're you know, you're spending money on classes that you want to take, like you're doing some Pilates or whatever it is. And and I kind of like for me, it's still hard because I still think of you as a little kid, which is I it's it's more of an endearing thing. It's not meant to be like you're not mature, but when I hear you're like, oh no, I'm saving money and I'm doing this, and I it freaks me out, you know what I mean? Because I'm like, no, no.

Julie:

It freaks me out too because I love spending my money. So knowing that I have like a part that I can't use is like no, but I love that you're doing that.

Carmen Lezeth:

A lot of people don't. I I've I didn't do that at your age at all.

Julie:

I mean, yeah, I got my paycheck today and I'm saving that.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, okay. For the gift that you're buying me on top of taking me out for my birthday. So I'm gonna get that gift when? Are you mailing it to me? Sending a list. Do you feel pressure that you have to take the right path? Whatever that right path is.

Julie:

Yes, yeah. So I think especially in the past at least six months since being a senior, that's like been the time that I'm considering all my options. And I've tried to look at every option, think of the best, think of the worst, see how it can help me out in general.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay, what is the thing that stresses you out the most about your future?

Julie:

What stresses me out is not being on the right path, like career-wise, that because my two options would be being a lawyer or working in marketing, and those are two completely different things.

Carmen Lezeth:

But I said it because they can mesh together, right?

Julie:

I know they can both use like what I'm majoring in, so it's fine. But what stresses me is that I'm gonna pick one of those and then realize I wish I picked the other one, or just not be able to decide and just make the wrong decision.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay, so I'm just gonna tell you when I went to college at UVM, I started off as an economics major, then I was a political science major, right? Because I I came from an industry of people who worked in finance, and then I wanted to be, I thought, like, oh, I I took one class in politics or whatever, and I was like, oh, I want to be a political science major. And then I was like, oh, but theater, I love theater. And then I started taking film classes. So the reason why you bring this up is I made so many changes, and I would tell you that most of my friends started off doing one thing and ended up doing something else. And I ended up because I had made so many changes, I ended up with a degree in English and film. I ended up, though, that's those were my studies. That was not what I started in with. I thought I knew what I wanted to do, and then I was able to experience the world in a different way, that I could find my way back to performing in some way, shape, or form, right? With film and stuff and studying. I mean, I didn't study film in college as a performer, but that was what was leading me to coming back to Hollywood, right? To finding my way back here and then moving out here. I had no intentions when I first went into college thinking that I would end up back where I always wanted to be, because you have all those pressures and weirdness or whatever that guide you the wrong way, or you don't know if it's the right decision. So I guess what I'm saying is, and this is where I know maybe your parents would want to hit me upside the head, but I think you just have to be open-minded. That's why I was laughing, open-minded to the possibility that change is inevitable. You know what I mean? Like you're you might have a that's why I was laughing. Like you might have a focus of what you think is going to happen. And hopefully all the changes you get to make are your choice, right? I mean, that's what I hope. Because sometimes things happen, like, you know, I hurt my hip. I cannot dance anymore. That's not something that was a choice, you know? So I just want you to not be so stressed about the choices you're making.

Julie:

Yeah, I know. I've I mean, I've heard so many stories of people like changing their majors and doing all that. So that's not what scares me. It just like the end result of what career, you know, not not necessarily what I'm studying.

Carmen Lezeth:

Right. But you're gonna be fine. I think what's interesting is how much you've thought about this. And yeah, you know, you don't want to just be a lawyer, you want to be a corporate lawyer, like you're very specific on what it is you want to do. And so I kind of love that and I applaud that. I think what I'm most afraid of is when people put so much pressure on teenagers to make a decision and almost forcing them to do like I see a lot of parents wanting their kids to do things because they didn't do them. You want to give your kids everything you don't have, but if you're not paying attention to what the kid wants, you can't live vicariously through your kid. Does that make sense? Yeah, yeah. I mean, of course, you're gonna be like, yeah, totally makes sense, totally.

Julie:

No, but I do understand. Oh, am I boring you? No, I every time I yawn, I think about you like how you're gonna say that I'm I'm make you're making me sleepy.

Carmen Lezeth:

I woke up at 5 30. Because you went to your class, right? Yeah, go ahead. How do you handle it when something you plan doesn't go the way you thought?

Julie:

Um, everything goes my way.

Carmen Lezeth:

No, I'm just kidding. I think you're kind of a go-with-the-flow kind of person.

Julie:

A lot of the time I can do things and it doesn't end up going my way, but honestly, that does push me to get better. Like, I can give an example that in swim, I started swimming my sophomore year. Everyone in swim started when they were like five years old, and I was not good at it. And if I went back right now, I still wouldn't be good at it. But I can say that I'm better now than I was back then, and it's something that I've just come to accept. I think that's like when I'm not good at something and something doesn't go my way, like I've learned to accept it and then like branch out from it. I'm still like trying my best to be active now, and I go to the gym and I go to Pilates, and I'm being active in different ways, and I'm still like training my body and helping me in like different ways. So I think being like, if it doesn't go my way, I can learn from that. And like I didn't start going to the gym until last year.

Carmen Lezeth:

No, but I'm gonna disagree with you on something. Surprise. Okay. Because here's what you're doing that you're leaving out. You were amazing at karate, you're a great skier, right?

Julie:

Well, that's new.

Carmen Lezeth:

I know, but I'm just saying it's kind of interesting, right? That you don't even like you're not even that that may not be your love, but for some reason, I think it's because you had so many friends who were swimmers. Swimming became kind of this weird bar for you that you wanted to excel at it, and then you realize it's not my jam. But you're really a great skier. You were great at karate, even if you didn't love it, you were really good at it. I went to your competition, was very proud of you. But okay, go ahead. I just wanted to throw that out there.

Julie:

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I do agree. Like, also my dirt bikes, like, I've I'm gonna be but but I'm just saying, like, as an example of like something I wasn't good at for a long time, not being good at swim made me think that I wasn't able to be good at anything, and I didn't really realize how much potential I had in different things. Like, even if it wasn't being athletic, I could be good at different things. Like I'm creative or I can read a lot of books and make a lot, yeah. Like I can be all of that and then still be good at that. That doesn't mean I have to be good in every aspect of everything, you know? Like, so it's kind of just realizing what you're good at and what you're not, and trying to work on that.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, I love that. I love that about you. I think it's really good. It's a hard thing for people to understand that you don't have to be good at everything. There are adults who don't understand that, you know. And you can try things, you try a lot of different things, and then you excel at some of them, and some of them you don't, and then you figure out a way to move through it. And I think you did that very well with swimming. Wait, didn't I donate a lot of money to your swimming club? You did. You did. Well, that won't ever happen again.

unknown:

Wait, wait, wait.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay, we'll tell people later what that means. Okay, I didn't know it was both. You can do both. I think I like the one. Okay. All right, all right.

Julie:

I have to do the kissy face.

Carmen Lezeth:

I don't like that part. I think it's weird.

Julie:

We're going like this.

unknown:

Like this.

Julie:

We're going like this.

Carmen Lezeth:

Oh, really? This is the old people way.

unknown:

Okay.

Carmen Lezeth:

People gonna be like, this is weird. But this is, I just want you to know, she's telling me what's going on in the Gen Z world. That's what she's just giving me some. But here's the thing like, I kid around with you, but I would never watch me be doing it with all it like in the future. It's like when you see old people trying to be like cool with like it doesn't work, you can't know that. Yeah, yeah. What do adults misunderstand about Gen Z decision making?

Julie:

I don't know. I feel like as a like as a whole, we've really modernized in a way, you know what I mean? Like us compared to 50 years ago or whatever, like completely different. So I think being in that era of time before and seeing it now is just very different, and you they might not grasp that, but yeah, I don't really know.

Carmen Lezeth:

But like like technology, you mean you have more access?

Julie:

Yeah, I was thinking that when it comes to school, for example, everything's online now, and that's just completely different. You don't have to know everything about it, you know. It's a lot of things.

Carmen Lezeth:

You were doing great the other day. Do you get nervous and you start saying like a lot? No, I just say like, yeah, stop saying I like like no, you don't want to like like you not see you. This is where you pull a shit. I think it's I say uh, and I told you this. I say um and uh a lot, and those are like weird placeholders in our conversations, and so but for you, it's not that like is bad, it's I used to say like all the time too.

Julie:

I say when I'm being asked a question, I don't know how to answer.

Carmen Lezeth:

Right. So just say I don't know how to answer that, and then I don't want to answer it. Instead of being like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, just cut it out. Oh, but you know what? Because here's why. If I do it that many times, you're gonna look like this in the picture. That's why I'm telling you. You know how you see those edits? Like, like, like, like, like, like it's it's too much, and then you're like, there should be like uh you're gonna be self conscious about it. I love it.

Julie:

It should be an app that blurs out words that you don't want to use, right?

Carmen Lezeth:

But you know what? You'll learn to stop. I used to say it all the time, that's why I know.

unknown:

Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth:

It's not a bad thing. It's just part of being a teenager and growing up. I know. Do people know what that means? They don't know what this means either. Right, right. They look the same. We do look the same. Should we tell them? Keep it a second. I don't know. I don't know. It's like September 9th. I think, right? Or 6th? I think it's September 9th. This is gonna be a weird video. I mean, this is gonna be a weird private lounge because people can be like, okay, so we have, okay, so when you were little, and I was younger, not when we were both little. Um, because I've known you since you were born. I think you were two days old when I met you. When you were little, I used to say we were like twins. I forget why we brought it up or whatever, right? And I said we were twins because look at our elbows are exactly the same. That was what we came up with, and so it became a thing. And then we have our our day, our day, and it's in September. That's Carmen and Juliana Day. Or I should say Juliana and Carmen Day, because you should probably go first, but whatever. Well, it's our day.

Julie:

If it's alphabetical.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, I guess it would be Carmen and Julie Day.

unknown:

Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay.

unknown:

All right.

Carmen Lezeth:

Do you think your generation approaches work and life differently than mine did at your age? I mean, I already know the answer is yes, but yeah.

Julie:

Work and life differently? I do think so in many ways. Because I think work was in like teenagehood. It was like more looked on back then, I think, because I know like what do you mean by looked on? It was more like people were working more.

Carmen Lezeth:

Like oh yeah, we we were work. I mean, I was working when I was 12.

Julie:

Like I was gonna say, my dad started working when he was 12. I didn't start until I was almost 17. And no, I was 17, yeah. So it just it starts much earlier, and so it that's very different from now. I think, and especially considering how many laws there are like stopping teens from working young. Okay, that's way before our time though, too.

Carmen Lezeth:

I think I know, but now, like it's just Oh, but you mean now people you mean parents don't want teenagers working.

Julie:

No, it's that. I mean for my school, you can't work until you're 16 because we have to give work permits.

Carmen Lezeth:

Oh, okay, you're right. I was wrong. You're right.

Julie:

There's very big restrictions on how many hours you can work, when you can work. So I think that's very different now compared to when you were a kid and you could work whenever, right?

Carmen Lezeth:

Right. Well, I think there's two different things you're talking about. I think this is the difference. I wasn't officially working at 11 and 12 years old. Yeah. I was working at like Little Peach, which is like it's a corner store, like 7-Eleven, I guess, here, because I knew somebody who worked there and they would pay me like five or 10 bucks, you know, to put the cans on the whatever. And so it wasn't like an official job. It's not like I was getting social security and money taken out or anything. I mean, I didn't get probably my first real job till I was like 16 or 17 years old, too. But I'm just saying I think the culture is probably very different. Like, I don't remember your mom and dad being like, she's got to start working at 12.

unknown:

Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth:

Like, I think also But you worked for your dad doing bookkeeping. You know QuickBooks better than a lot of people I hire. And I didn't get paid for that. Well, he would say you have a roof over your head. I was gonna say exactly that. He would totally say that. So, you know, in a lot of ways, you were doing the same thing. You were just doing it for your dad and you were doing bookkeeping, which is amazing.

Julie:

Yeah, I do agree on that, but at the same time, it's still like I think we also grew up under different circumstances, and needing a job was more needed than for me. But it's still, I think still in general, there is a big difference in that even I agree with you just for anyone.

Carmen Lezeth:

I think there's also a lot of like on the bad side of it, there's a lot of, and this is not your fault. This is, I think, parents' fault. This a lot of protecting their children from doing anything, you know what I mean? Like we we talked about this in the past, like even just being able to go outside and play or whatever, it's like you know, that's not even an option or whatever.

Julie:

So I think that's very big on safety too, yeah, of just everything.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, you know, and it's weird because it's my generation of people who are the parents we're talking about. And I think when I was growing up, I think there was the other extreme where we were left alone all the time, we were gone in the morning, we didn't come back till late at night because you know, the lights went down or whatever. It was a very different time, and so it feels like the pendulum went the other way, which is really protective and really overbearing. And so they both have their faults and their pluses and minuses, but I think that's what you're talking about, too. And yeah, same thing with work. I mean, I don't think any of the adults in my life were concerned that I was working at 12 and 13 years old. What matters most to you when you think about your future? Money, stability, passion, or freedom.

Julie:

Okay.

Carmen Lezeth:

Can it be all of those or none of those?

Julie:

Yeah, I think it is all of them. I can go into what like is most most though. I think money is very important because I think especially with how the economy looks, making more money is more important.

Carmen Lezeth:

I'm sad about that, but you're right.

Julie:

Yeah, it's not really about I want to be able to be happy in what I do while making money. And I think the only way I can do that is really working towards it, you know.

Carmen Lezeth:

And look, everybody wants to make money doing something they love, it just doesn't always work out that way. Yeah, but I want it to work out for you.

Julie:

If I really like if money didn't matter and I got to do whatever I wanted, like I'd be a teacher, but oh my god, that's so sad because you know what?

Carmen Lezeth:

A lot of my friends would say the same thing. Yeah. And I I'd be a great teacher.

Julie:

I think I would be too.

Carmen Lezeth:

That's so sad that we don't pay teachers enough money. I don't know. Give them a quality of life so that people like you would want to be teached. See, you'd be an amazing teacher.

Julie:

I know. Like I would drop everything to be a teacher.

Carmen Lezeth:

That's so sad. No, I mean, I think it's great, but that's so sad that we're gonna lose out on someone like what grade would you want to teach to? Little elementary, yeah. Yeah, see, I knew that. Yeah, oh Julie, you'd be a great teacher. I'm just I'm just sad about the state of our of our country and the way in which we treat teachers because um I think about all my friends who are teaching, like Billy was a teacher and left because he could make money. Andrea was a teacher, she left. You know, these would be great, great teachers. And now you're saying that. That's so sad. I'm so sorry. Okay, no, I'm sorry for us. I think we're losing. But yeah, I love that. And and I I'll say this I hate that money is an important part of it, but yeah, you're not wrong. But I wish the answer had been passion, you know. Yeah, because in the real world, our passions would be what we would add, but we can't live without money here. You can't live in California. It was so funny because when you were here, you were like, Oh, I wish I lived here. And I was like, if I get a two-bedroom, you know, like, but it's so expensive, everything is so expensive. Yeah, what are the things you know you want in life, no matter what path you take? A family. So cute, and that's changed since you were like eight. What did she know? You know what was so cute. I remember I don't know how old you were, but you were, I don't know, you were like maybe nine or ten, I don't know. And you were like, I don't want to have kids either. It's like I was still a kid. Like, why are you even thinking of this? I think it was also because of the dolls and whatever, you know what I mean? And now you want a family. I love that. Yeah, yeah. Okay, cute. All right, but you know, we're gonna wait till you become that lawyer and everything, right? We're gonna and I need to meet everyone. There is no one. Okay, I just want to be clear. I know your mom and dad have dibs on whatever, but the real deal right here, okay? All right, I'm just saying. Okay, what's one thing you've learned about yourself this year that surprised you?

unknown:

Ooh.

Julie:

This year just started.

Carmen Lezeth:

Say in the past 300 and whatever yeah that surprised me.

Julie:

Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth:

Um that's not the right time to use it, is it? It's not the right time to use it.

Julie:

Um, I don't know. Okay. No, because that is a good question, and I do want to figure out the answer.

Carmen Lezeth:

I think something that surprised me the other day is how quickly after we haven't seen each other for a while and we haven't talked, because we used to talk at least, I would say once a week, but then I would see you once a month because we don't live that close to each other. She found out driving home for three hours. Four. It was four hours.

Julie:

I got home at 7:40.

Carmen Lezeth:

That's crazy. Yeah. Something must have happened though.

Julie:

I don't, I don't know.

Carmen Lezeth:

No, no, but I'm just telling you that it's usually like an hour and a half at most. I know. Yeah. But what surprised me is how easily within I think it was, I don't know, five minutes, we were back to the way it's always been. Yeah. And I love that. I love that. And I love it because that to me means we have a real friendship. Because my real friendships, that's how it is. I might not talk to people for years. And the reason why we haven't talked, I just want to let the audience know, is not for any other reason, but except that you were you were being a teenager. You were growing up, you had to do what you had to do. And she's busy. I don't know, she's busy, boy. I don't know, she's busy, but we had a slight disagreement, and I let you do what you had to do. Wasn't that the best way to handle it? Or would you have preferred that I kept No, yeah. Well, no, you I mean, you can we don't have to talk. I mean, I'm just curious. We had a disagreement. I didn't like something she did, and I just let her be.

unknown:

Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth:

But I'm not a parent. What would you have preferred? No, this is good. You don't want to talk about it. Okay.

Julie:

Well, just exactly it's just like what happened was what it was good the way it happened. I think if anything else would have happened, it would have been different now.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, I think you're right. I think this is interesting for people to hear. Are you gonna be mad if I leave it in?

unknown:

No.

Carmen Lezeth:

I think what's interesting, because I wish a lot of parents would hear this too, is again, it's easy for me because I'm not responsible for you 24-7, so I get it. But I think badgering people over and over and over again and trying to force you to be something you're not, or trying to force you to believe what I believe, or trying to, you know what I mean, is never, it never works, especially when somebody's a teenager. Like I always say to you, you have to figure out whatever it is you need to figure it out. I told you where I stand. I'm a grown woman, I'm not gonna fight with a teenager, right? And I think that gave you the freedom to do whatever you needed to do, but you tell me what you think about that.

Julie:

I think like the it was everything's like handled properly.

Carmen Lezeth:

I'm not trying to make you give me kudos, I'm trying to make you teach people what works for someone like you. It's different for parents.

Julie:

I think for parents, if there is something that goes wrong, the parent should reach out and make sure that everything's okay. Especially even though it's everyone's first time living, I think the parent is older and should have a more mature view on the situation. If the child is being more mature, then there's something wrong.

Carmen Lezeth:

Wait, are you saying that you think you've been more mature than your parents? Be careful how you answer. I'm not saying anything. You think you were more mature than me in this situation? I'm giving advice. Just giving advice. Okay. Yeah. No, no, no. You're right. I think sometimes, sometimes adults, I'm not just gonna say parents, but sometimes adults react a certain way to teenagers. And I always say this, forgetting that they were once teenagers themselves. Like teenagers are gonna act like teenagers, they're gonna do that. That's not a bad or a good thing, it just is what it is. You have to figure things out on your own. And my whole thing has always been when you are ready to come to the table, we can have that conversation. And I think that's what we did the other day, which I thought was amazing because it was kind of cool. And there was no like, I'm sorry I did this, I'm sorry. It wasn't that. It was just like, you know what? Right? We didn't do that. It wasn't even, yeah. I kind of think that's what bothers me about parents when I watch, and it's because I don't have kids. When I watch parents and I see them just badgering kids over and over and over again, and I'm like, you're not listening. Yeah. In all fairness to parents, it must be really hard to have somebody who's four or five years old, right? Or baby, whatever, and you have to do everything for them. And then they turn into a teenager, and then there's like this clash of like, no, I want to do it on my own. You know, which I think you're gonna experience when you have that family. I can't wait. I can't wait because I'm gonna laugh my ass off, girl. No, I mean I can wait. I can wait a long time, like in your 30s or some. Okay, let me be clear. If you could give advice to your 14-year-old self, what would you say? Get off TikTok. Oh, really? I'm off of TikTok right now. Are you being serious? No.

Julie:

No, I love TikTok, I'm on it every day.

Carmen Lezeth:

Um, I was on, remember, that's why I when it was musically. Remember? Because you were on it, you introduced me to it, and it was so cool back then. Now it's a lot. Yeah, no, the real advice I would give is I think just listen to your godmother always. Just kidding. Okay, you should make this your logo. Yeah, okay, go ahead.

Julie:

No, but I think honestly, just staying like true to myself, I feel like okay, that's obviously the most basic advice to give, and I think every person has given that advice, but I truly do believe that because I've gone through a lot of phases in my life, and going through all of them built me to who I am today. If I didn't stay true to that and I didn't be like if I wasn't who I was, then I don't know how I would be now. I think it's just very important that we all trust the timing that we're given, and everything will end up falling into place because back then I was 14 when I was a sophomore. I think back then I was definitely making new friends and being introduced to a lot of new people, and if I saw who I am now, it would have been I don't know if I would have been happier or sad, but you know, I think if I was talking to my 13-year-old self, that would be a little different because when I was 13 I just started high school.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, because your birthday's at the end of the year.

Julie:

Yeah, yeah. But 13 was a very like, I don't know, that that year I was I didn't really have any friends. I was starting a new school, so I think that's kind of similar to where I'm at now.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, because you're made it's a it's a change. Yeah, making a change in your life, you know. So not getting off of TikTok is not what you would tell yourself, but you would tell yourself. Yeah, no, no, no. I mean, but it you would tell yourself what comes to mind right now. Your 13-year-old self. Just grow. It's gonna be okay. Yeah, you go, girl. You go, girl, yeah.

unknown:

And listen to your godmother.

Carmen Lezeth:

I think if I could change one thing about our relationship, I won't say it. Oh, say it. Say it. No, I can't. No, please say it. I can't. It's controversial. Well, now you have to say it because I don't know what it is. I'm not gonna say it yet.

Julie:

Can you text it to me? No, I think if I would change one thing about our relationship, is that I live by the beach.

Carmen Lezeth:

So you so you live near me. No, you're gonna have to tell me because now. Am I gonna be sad? Is that why? No, I don't know.

unknown:

Okay.

Carmen Lezeth:

But if there was one thing I could change, yeah, I was gonna uplift, but see, you you have to dig down. You see how it is punching down. I I I lift up. Okay, that's the difference between you and me. Okay. If I were to change one thing about our relationship, I think is um yeah, it's controversial. I don't want to say it either. You're right. I don't want to say it. No, you're just teasing now. I realize now, like that could be painful. I don't know. No, now you have to. Oh no, oh, see how that feels. Doesn't that feel horrible? Okay, okay, better yet, what is one thing that if you could change about your own life, what would it be? If I could change one thing about my life, I'll start with me. I would have moved out to California when I was much younger. I would have done it, I would have come to college here because I love this town so much. That's the one thing I wish I had done. But I didn't know. I didn't know what I didn't know. What about you?

Julie:

I've just asked to be older, so then I already know what I'm doing with my life.

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, that's not how it works. No, absolutely not. That's not how it works, but this is the most exciting time, Julie. I know, I know it sounds weird coming from older people or whatever, but wow man, 17 and 18, this is the fun time. This is this is the good stuff. Yeah, so okay, do we want to tell everybody what this means? Do we want to? Or we'll it's just a it's just a heart, right? So she was explaining it's a heart. See, it makes a heart. Yeah, but what's with the kissy face?

unknown:

I don't like that part.

Julie:

It's so goofy. I can't even do it when I laugh.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay, I I'm leaving this all in because it's gonna be so goofy, but I love it. Well, look at it. Thank you so much for hanging out on the private lounge with me. I appreciate it. Look at I always think it's cool to have uh people from a different generation, whether older or younger, on the show. So you didn't even hesitate. You were like, Yeah, I'll do it. I thought you weren't gonna want to do it. Why are you so tired? I woke up at 5 30. I get up every day at 4 30. You're supposed to be like me.

Julie:

What time did you go to sleep?

Carmen Lezeth:

Yeah, okay. All right, all right. Twins. I went to sleep at midnight. Okay, so yeah. And you went to Pilates. And then I'm going to the gym tonight. Okay. Well, don't overdo it, okay? But I love you for doing this. Thank you so much for being on the show. I will edit it so you look good.

Julie:

And um Yeah, because I'm looking a little wrecked.

Carmen Lezeth:

Okay, I can't, I don't okay. You're ridiculous.

unknown:

Okay.

Carmen Lezeth:

All right. Everyone, thank you so much for stopping by. I appreciate it. And remember, at the end of the day, it really is all about the joy. Bye, everyone. Thanks for stopping by, all about the joy. Be better and stay beautiful, folks. Have a sweet day.

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