SPEAKERS
Ray Ciafardini, Pete Mohr
Ray Ciafardini 00:00
I believe when we're coaching someone, the goal is to have the person we're coaching, keep their eyes on the challenge. And for me as the coach or whoever listens to this as the coach to keep their eyes on the person, they're coaching, because the moment both the person we're coaching and I as the coach starts to look at the problem, I become a professional problem solver. So my goal is to keep my eyes on them to help coach them through the challenge, rather than provide the solution to the challenge.
Pete Mohr 00:34
Hey, it's Pete, and welcome to another edition of the simplifying entrepreneurship podcast. This series designed to help you change your entrepreneurial worries and wants into wins by providing the tips and tools that will help you cut through the chaos, create clarity, using systems that will transform your business and life as a leader. And today, I had the opportunity to speak with Ray chaffer Dini, and Ray is an NLP coach, working with breakthroughs all the time. And today, we're going to talk a little bit about coaching your team instead of being a professional problem solver. As a leader, I really enjoyed my conversation here with Ray. And I'm very fortunate to often be with him in the morning, early mornings at 6am, eastern standard time on his clubhouse room called an empowered life. So you may want to take a little bit of that in some days to after you hear this great conversation. We'll dig right into it. Hey, Ray, it's great to have you here on the simplifying entrepreneurship podcast. Thanks, Pete, I appreciate you having me. Good to see you. It's great. I mean, we get together often in your room on an empowered life on clubhouse in the mornings. really enjoy our chats there. And I'm so glad that you came here to join me on the simplifying entrepreneurship podcast. And today, we are going to talk all about how to coach your team to find their own successes and not dig in on top of them all the time. Right. Absolutely love the topic. Yeah. And I know that's something that's near and dear to you just kick it off here for us. Right? And why do you think it's so important to let your team members tackle their own issues and not sort of be on top of them on that?
02:14
Yeah, that's a great question. He years ago, when I started out as a coach, where I think this thought process started was I used to want to be the hero in other people's stories, that there was this idea that I wanted people to need me in their stories and, and then a little bit later in my career, I heard someone make the statement that we never want to deprive someone of the opportunity to handle their own challenge. We never want to deprive someone of the opportunity to handle their own challenge. What I realized was that that's how we develop leaders, rather than people dependent on me. So if I ever wanted to grow a business, or help people go out and do the cool things that they wanted to do, I didn't want to have them be dependent on me. So I think it develops businesses faster. I think it develops leaders faster, it creates freedom for the business owner, so many positive outcomes, I think, from allowing people to handle their own challenges.
Pete Mohr 03:07
Yeah, I couldn't agree more. And I know, you know, I'm a business Made Simple coach, and we talk about that, too. You know, you don't necessarily want to be the hero, you want to be the guide, you're there to guide them along and help them make those wins, right. And that's the job of the leader. It's not, it's not to be there saying I'll do it, and I'll get it done and all this sort of stuff. It's more like, how can I help you? How can I remove the roadblocks so that you're making the progress? And you're able to advance through all of those kinds of things?
03:36
Absolutely. And I think that the way that we ask questions being that guide, right, that there's a huge difference between telling and teaching all the time, which I think in some cases is absolutely necessary, right. Everyone needs to be for sure. How did you initially, and I think it comes to allowing them to figure that out and asking the appropriate questions that allow them to uncover their own genius.
Pete Mohr 03:58
Yeah, I love that area of genius. And when we maximize all of those different areas of genius with our team, then the team really becomes powerful and strong. I mean, it really just starts to do things on its own. And that idea of one plus one equals three becomes reality, right? Absolutely. What's your idea in behind leadership, that micromanage things versus allowing those people to grow? Like, in your time back when you were leading a team? And I know, now you're doing a lot more coaching, but I know you lead big teams as well, right? How did you deal with that when you felt the need? Because I know a lot of people will say, you know, I can just get it done easier myself if I knock it off, right? That's sort of a common entrepreneurial, especially small business sort of trend, and thought, what would you say to somebody who's saying, Hey, I can just get this done myself, and I'll push through it.
04:50
So it's funny, because if I knew then what I know now I would have made drastically different decisions. Yeah. So what I would say to that now is absolutely you probably can do it quicker, faster and better. Now, the question is, do you want to do it quicker, better and faster forever, because I'd rather teach other people to do those things. And while I think delegating is important, the goal isn't to necessarily delegate just because I don't want to do things. It's delegation for the sake of allowing other people again, to live in their zone of genius and allow people to live out their strength and not deprive people of that. So yeah, my response to that would absolutely be, you may be able to do it quicker, better, faster. Now, do you want to do it quicker, better, faster forever? Or would you rather create some freedom for yourself,
Pete Mohr 05:35
right, and then you can work in your zone of genius, right, as opposed to dealing with all of those other things. And that is such a big thing, allowing those others to take on those pieces, that is their genius may not be yours, you may be able to do it better right now. But it might not be what you love to do as the leader either, right? and allowing that to be passed on is going to allow you to work in your zone of genius, so that you can really, truly do what you love. And when that happens, then things start to happen and the business grows and everybody else grows. My biggest thing when I look at this is if you don't let people find their own solutions, and you don't coach them through those things, you don't let them win at those kinds of things, then they're probably just going to leave because everybody wants to feel as though they're part of the decision making process. And they want to be a part of the growth of the business. What's your take on that?
06:28
I agree. And in my experience, I've experienced three different scenarios. I guess there are absolutely the people that want more, right. Those are the people that leave and quitting and leaving just to be clear, is better than quitting and not leaving. And that is a second scenario, right? It is wet, and they don't need the business. And then the third scenario that I experienced, was that if I had people on my team that wanted me to solve everything that wanted me to be that person, what I realized, and unfortunately, in some cases realized it too late, was that they weren't the right people. Yeah. So I think those three scenarios are things that I was constantly juggling. And absolutely, yeah, they do leave or they quit and don't leave, which is not a good scenario for the business. Or they could just potentially not be the right person. So I want people that want to handle their challenges
Pete Mohr 07:15
out of those three. What do you think is the worst situation? I'd say quitting and not leaving? Yeah, me too. I mean, it's dreadful. It's dreadful for the morale, because all of the rest of the team knows that person has already quit, they know that person has given up. And a lot of that sort of stuff has ripple effects throughout the entire organization. And it becomes another leadership issue again, right?
07:39
And it's not fun for that person. No, I think very few people like to be in that scenario. And for whatever reason, they choose to stay in. It doesn't benefit them. Right?
Pete Mohr 07:49
Can you give us one or two tips on how to coach your team to find their own solutions? Like, tell us one or two things that that you might suggest to an entrepreneur that's having issues, letting them tackle some of that sort
08:01
of stuff? Yeah, I think that's a great question. I think two things come to mind when I hear that one. I think identifying where that person is in their development is crucial for this. Because some people, especially when they're new in the business, or in any business, need to be taught, they don't necessarily need to be coached. I used to recruit, train and lead salespeople. And if I asked a new sales representative who never been in sales, when do you want to get on the phone? Well, they would just pick when convenient, not necessarily most productive, right? So coaching does follow some teaching. Otherwise, you just have people who are motivated that don't know what they're doing. So I think recognizing where that person is, and once you move into that coaching phase of their career, this made the biggest difference. And if there's one takeaway that I hope anyone to take away from this, it's this. It's the idea that I believe when we're coaching someone, the goal is to have the person we're coaching, keep their eyes on the challenge. And for me as the coach, or who's ever listened to this as the coach to keep their eyes on the person, they're coaching, because the moment both the person we're coaching and I, as the coach, start to look at the problem, I become a professional problem solver. So my goal is to keep my eyes on them to help coach them through that challenge, rather than provide the solution to the challenge.
Pete Mohr 09:16
I love that I think that's wise advice, for sure. You know, Ray, believe it or not, we're already coming to the closing of this particular podcast Time goes really quick. And what I wanted to ask you as well on top of this, in your work, how do you help entrepreneurs and business leaders simplify entrepreneurship and what you do every day? Absolutely. Great question,
09:37
Peter. Thank you for asking that. So my zone of genius, if you will, my skill set is help freeing people from the limiting beliefs and past negative emotional baggage that allows them to go on to implement the strategy. So yes, I do coach people and the part where my clients I think, see the biggest benefit is prior to the strategy, releasing everything that's holding them back. So whatever they choose to do, that strategy is more impactful in their business. Yeah.
Pete Mohr 10:05
I love that. I love that. And I mean, I appreciate all you do. And love speaking with you on the morning at an empowered life on clubhouse regularly, you know, right. Can you let everybody know who's listening to the conversation here today? How they can get ahold of you? And if they want to find out a little bit more information?
10:23
Yeah, another great question. Thank you for asking. So my website, you can go to my coach Ray, that's m ycoachray.com. And the part that's probably most interesting, if I could direct people when they go to the site, it's to learn about how the release works, that allows people to go on to do all the cool things they want to do. So I appreciate you asking that. Pete.
Pete Mohr 10:46
Yeah, I think that's great. And I encourage everybody to also join clubhouse Right, right. Tell them about clubhouse as well.
10:52
Sure. Yeah. And, Pete, you've been a huge part of that over the last couple of months. And it's crazy to think it's been a couple of months now. So every morning at 6am eastern time, we have a room, myself and Pete and a few other people moderate they're called creating an empowered life, where we talk about the habits, the rituals, the mindsets, the things that we do each and every day that allow us to create and live the empowered lives that many of us desire to live. So it's a great conversation, different topic every morning, roughly 90 minutes, seven days a week every day. So it's it's a good conversation.
Pete Mohr 11:22
Glad to be a part of it. Well, thanks so much for spending some time with us here, Ray and appreciate it. And we'll see you again probably tomorrow morning. Thank you, Pete, I appreciate you having me on today. Well, thanks for spending some time with me here today and think about how you can apply some of Ray's great tips on simplifying entrepreneurship, and all around the idea that you should be coaching your team instead of being a professional problem solver. Some of the stuff we went over here today, you know, the difference between telling and teaching and not to deprive others of handling their own challenges working in your zone of genius and the idea of quitting and leaving is better than someone who has quit and stays around. Lots of great wisdom here from Ray today. So if you like the podcast, please share it with your friends, invite them to listen and most of all, subscribe to the podcast so you can hear future episodes. I see every review and will personally respond to each one and for more information on my coaching and leadership programs visit www.Mohr.Coach or email me directly at Pete@Mohr.Coach. Until next time, make it a great day. an ironic Media Production visit us at www.Ironickmedia.com.
