Awake at 3 a.m.

You know how you go to bed determined to get a good night’s sleep. Here’s what it’s like when I find myself awake at 3 a.m.

Oh, it’s only 3, I’ve got a few more hours.

That’s plenty of time before the alarm goes off. 

[Sheets ruffling]

It’s only 3:10 now, maybe I’ll get a drink of water.

[Water pouring sound]

Ah, yes, perfect. Now I can sleep.

It’s cold in here. I need another blanket. That will help.

[Footsteps]

What now? My back is itching. Why for no reason does my back start itching. 

I’m still cold. One more blanket will help. Okay, maybe 2 so I don’t have to get up again.

[Footsteps]

That’s better. I’ll be warm in a minute and I can fall right back to sleep.

Ugh my back hurts. I’ve been laying in this position too long. I’ll just turn over. 

[Sheets rustling]

So tomorrow when I get to work I’m going to ask about that new policy…stop! 

I’ll ask for a written copy? Stop, no more scripting!

I need more water. I’m too thirsty to sleep.

[Footsteps]

[Water pouring sound]

I’m all hydrated now. On to dreamland.

What time is it? Don’t look at the clock, don’t look at the clock.

[Clock ticking]

Maybe ear plugs will help.

I think I’ll talk to Bob when I get to work tomorrow…stop!

What if I don’t hear the alarm with these ear plugs in? I’ll turn it up.

Meditating works, right? Listen to your breathing. In, out.

[Deep breathing]

It’s only been about 5 minutes, right? I have plenty of time to get to sleep.

My nose is stuffy. I’ll get up and get a tissue.

Ah yes, that’s better. 

I don’t think I’ll hear the alarm. I’ve got to take these ear plugs out.

My right knee hurts when I lay this way. I need to change sides again.

[Ruffling sheets]

That’s not helping. I’ll get up and put on that knee brace.

[Footsteps]

Now my feet are cold. I need socks.

What? It’s 4:15!

Why is this song stuck in my head?

What time is it now? Don’t think about the time.

There’s no way I’ll stay awake until the alarm goes off. I have to fall asleep right?

What’s wrong with this pillow? Can’t they make a comfortable pillow? 

[Pillow fluffing]

I went to bed at 10, woke up at 3, that’s enough, 5 hours is enough right? 

I have to get up and go to the bathroom.

[Footsteps]

Ah, yes, so I’ve taken care of everything that could keep me awake and now I’ll fall asleep.

Maybe if I lay on my back.

[Sheets ruffling]

My back hurts. It’s this mattress. It’s got to be. What else would keep me awake.

[Car door close]

I think I heard the front door. No that was a car door. Who is driving around at this time of night? Can’t they be a little quieter?

It’s been an hour, right? Ugh.

It’s too bright in here. I’m getting my sleep mask.

[Footsteps]

That’s better. Now where was I? Meditating.

[MEOW.]

I’m sleeping. MEOW. You’re not coming into this room when I’m sleeping.

Maybe just resting is good enough, right?

I’ve heard that you can actually be asleep and think you’re awake.

What am I supposed to take to work tomorrow?

Hush!

I’m going to feel tired today. I need sleep!

I’m about to fall asleep I just know I am.

[Alarm rings]